Hey you guys, I'm sorry I haven't been able to update as much as you like but I just got a new job in a different city and I'm adjusting to everything.

I hope you like this one and remember to keep your minds open, there's more to the story and soon you will know more of Callie side of the story and if you don't like it, you guys know you can walk away and not read anymore.

Have a great rest of the week, will hopely see you on weekend.

Because of her

Chapter 6

I could feel her eyes on me and as expected she always gained a reaction from me, I hated it. I hated it then and I hate it now, how she with only one look can make me feel so many things ... Love, hate, anger, joy, sadness, surprise, desolation, hope, disappointment and let's not talk about the reactions that she gets from my body, those are in a whole different category.

My body knows her, it wants her, it yearns for her and sometimes I feel guilty and ashamed for it.

I am sitting in front of her in a luxurious restaurant to which she is a guest of honor, her best friend, Mark Sloan, is opening the restaurant and I am here as her plus one ... I should have said no, but when have I been able to say No to this woman.

"Are you going to ignore my presence all night?" Ah the joy of indifference, I think it's the only weapon I can use against her. In a battle that I feel so unarmed, ignoring her or at least trying to, it's the best I can do to keep up in this fight.

"Arizona? I'm talking to you." Her voice was calm, but during the time I've known her I can recognize the stiffness and annoyance of her tone ... Funny, she used to be so sweet and gentle when addressing me.

Now it's just a sway of whoever keeps control and I must admit, I'm getting tired ... enough to get away completely? I'm not sure about that, yet.

"And I'm trying to ignore you, can't you see it?" I pretend to read something on my phone, when I don't actually have any message or email, I just want to not have to see her stare at me or for sure, I'll be gone and before I know, I will be among her sheets under the touch of her sweaty skin and her panting breath.

"I can see that, but could you, please, look at me and talk to me like a normal person." With every word that came out of her mouth, her Latin accent was noticeable even more, I noticed that this happened when she began to lose patience and anger took charge of her, but at this point I could care less.

"I'm talking to you, Calliope." The use of her full name plus my tone of voice, is far from being an expression of affection and more as a way to let her know that I don't want to continue with this stupid conversation that keeps going on in circles ... But if I'm being honest, I'm really just provoking her and I'm not ashamed to say, that's exactly what I want ... What is adulthood, again?

"You're not even looking at me." She hissed annoyed, but still my eyes were glued to the screen of my cell, this was until her palm hit the surface of the table where we were sitting. This took me by surprise and effectively won its purpose, my eyes wide open almost afraid, because I had never seen this side of her, at least not in this kind of place and certainly not directed to me.

I put my phone on the table and I tilted my head to the side crossing my arms over my chest, letting her know that whatever she was going to say, I was not in the mood to listen.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Now you're letting your hot temper go wild in front of everyone here?" I say in a scolding way.

"You are the one who's ignoring me." In her eyes I can still see the blazing fire, but at the same time see the plead of someone who only wants attention. As I said, indifference is the best course of action I can find to keep my head up in front of her.

"Callie, you know I don't want to be here, I don't even like your friend Sloan and I'm pretty sure he doesn't like me either." I let her know my discontent for what seems to be the millionth time. "The only reason I'm here is because you said you had something important to tell me, so here I am Callie. What is so important that you have to tell me and that it was absolutely necessary to come to this thing? You know that this is not really my thing."

"As I told you the first ten times you asked me," She was exasperated, but really, I didn't care. "This is the only chance I'll have to talk to you because I'm going on a trip to New York tomorrow night, if you had taken any of my calls in the last few days, I would have had more time to explain -"

"Oh you going to New York? So it's Nick's weekend, then?" I interrupted her, jealousy boiling my blood just thinking that she will spend god knows how long in New York, doing god knows how many things with her other partner ... This It's stupid! She is not even my wife, oh wait ... She already has one!

This tumult of thoughts goes through my mind, while she just stares at me, she squints and stares at me. After what seems to be hours of looking at each other, she decides to continue.

"If you must know, no, I'm not going to New York to be with Nickolas, it's a business trip with the investors of my hotels in the city, happy now?" She copied the position I'm in, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Whatever." I rolled my eyes, just mentioning her "boyfriend" and the memory of that she, in fact, has a wife, in Miami, makes me want to shout a few truths to her face and then run away.

"The point is, what I have to say, I have to say it now or it will be worse later, I'll be back in a few days, if you are willing and if you want, we can talk more calmly." Always trying to make me believe that who matters It's me, and you know something, for months I seriously thought it was true ... How does indifference play out really, ah?

"Callie, just say it!" I said whispering screaming.

"Ok!" She took a deep breath and looked at me with guilt in her eyes and I have to say, I had never seen such a thing reflected in her eyes more than when we discussed the initial terms of our relationship.

Yes, I remember that day, it was two days after she bombarded me with the wife, the open marriage and a third person involved in this, a man named Nickolas, who lived in New York who she met because he was one of the firm's attorneys that she'd hired to do the negotiations for her first hotel in New York, he was a divorced man with two daughters and no intention to formalize any relationship rather than having Callie.

Do you want to know how that went? My money is on yes, you do...

I was pacing back and forth in the living room of my 503 apartment, it was a good apartment, the building was in the middle of important places like my work place and the best hospital in the city, from which some of my psychiatric patients were usually referred to us, but that is not important for the story right now, the important thing is that sitting on my large black leather sofa, sat the woman who only a couple of days ago had told me that, not only did she have a wife, but she had another partner, since she was in an open marriage with said wife.

I couldn't believe it at first and after our conversation that day I just left, wanting to have some space, everything that was happening was crazy ... even to this day I don't think I can understand everything very clearly.

Today, I have only reached one conclusion, I am in love with a woman who is in love with two other people and one of them is actually her wife... crazy right? Do you know what else is it? Pathetic! Some people might say I have zero self - esteem and that may be true or maybe not, all I know is that day in my apartment I wanted to believe that I really could keep control of the situation, when in fact, I haven't been in control of anything since I met her.

Anyway, I think I strayed into my thoughts again. Back to my memories...

She was sitting on my couch, looking beautiful as usual, when her voice stopped me on my tracks, "Arizona." Her voice, the way she said my name, to this day, there's no way I'm not paralyzed when listening to her call my name that way. "Please, come and sit with me." She whispered once more, her voice low, delicate, gentle.

It only took one look from her to me, one look and I felt powerless. I walked towards her and sat next to her, my body and gaze trying, just trying to hold it back, but then she stroked my cheek with her soft smoothly hands, her hand went from my cheek to the base of my neck and started to play with my hair...

Jesus Christ! It was the only thing I could think of back then, my body was beginning to react in ways that I had only felt when being close to her and we haven't even had sex, for all I knew, she could be bad in bed - which was dubious - and even then, I would be perfectly satisfied with just one touch of her.

"Callie, I really like you." I said in a low voice, I closed my eyes as I enjoyed her touch a little more.

"I like you too." Then I knew that she was in my personal space, her breath was on my face, her breath on my cheek and then a light kiss at the base of my ear, put the nerve terminals in my entire my body on fire

That's when I opened my eyes, I needed to recover, to recover my composure and to think with my head and not with my lady parts - if you know what I mean - and even then, when all I wanted was to maintain a propitious distance, I found myself almost recessed to that leather sofa.

"But… I can't do this." Finally, I managed to say what my brain took so long to resolve, talk about malfunctional brain.

"Can't do what, Amor?" I remember thinking it was so unfair that she used her native language to continue seducing me, I mean, there I was, trying to do the right thing and she just said a word in Spanish and I was about to lose all reason ... it was not fair then and it is not fair now.

"Don't do that?" I said weakly, bringing my hands to my face and tilting my elbows on my thighs.

"Do what?" She then placed her warm hand on my bent back and I remember hearing the weakest and quietest of giggles.

"Seduce me!" I expressed almost exasperated, but in actually frustrated, "With the way you talk to me and your voice down and the Spanish, really?" I looked at her almost annoyed and she just smiled, which It bothered me even more, "This is serious, Callie, I'm serious, you have a wife! And a partner, a male partner!" I was not screaming, but maybe I was ... just a little.

"I told you -"

I interrupted her immediately, "Yes, you have an open marriage, but Callie, still, you're married, open marriage or not, you're cheating on your wife, don't you feel any remorse? And you're cheating on her with a man? Like, are you a real lesbian or are you just one of those women who just pretends to be a lesbian for a while before going back to men again?"

"Ok, I'm going to have to stop you right there," she put a hand up in a stop sigh. "First, let's clarify this, I cannot be a 'real lesbian'" Her expression in quotation marks, "Because I'm not a lesbian, I identify myself as a bisexual woman and this does not mean I'm promiscuous or unable to choose between two genders, I am completely able to sustain a relationship with any gender, female or male." She said calmly, but almost defending herself. "And just so you know, it's a bit offensive that you ask those things, I don't go around, asking people if they are golden star lesbians or any of this nonsense that exists today."

"You say you can have a relationship with any person, woman or man, so what do you do now, is just your version and explanation to be with both at the same time?" I know, it wasn't my best moment, I admit.

Callie took a deep breath and narrowed her eyes, "I'm going to choose to ignore that comment, just because I know you're upset and confused and you're trying to pick a fight." I just shrugged, not answering anything, because I knew deep down, she was right.

"And second," she continued after a few minutes, "I'm not cheating on my wife because she knows everything and she agrees on it." She said as if that solved everything.

"That does not make it right, Callie." I refuted in a low voice.

"Who says so?" She asked and I remember that I just couldn't believe that she saw this as something completely normal, "Nickolas knows about my wife, Sarah knows about Nickolas or anyone else I've been with since our marriage is open, you, Arizona Robbins, you're not going to make me feel ashamed or guilty, I'm not doing anything wrong."

"You are so arrogant." It was the only thing I could answer.

"And you as stubborn as a mule." She mumbled back to me. "Look, I'm not saying that you should get into this deal, it's your decision, it will always be your decision, I cannot force you to do anything you don't want to do, but you should know that I would love to know you more and spend time with you, but If you don't even want that, then I will understand it too." You know the drill, she always making me feel like it was my decision, but the penetrating and defiant look on her face told me that she already knew what my answer would be.

So at that time I decided that I should keep some control in the situation so, "Ok." I said simply and she couldn't even conceal surprise, on the contrary, she smiled from ear to ear, as if she just had won the jackpot and when she bent over to kiss me, it was the moment when I thought I would be winning for once ... Ha!What a fool was I.

"But," I stopped her advance with a hand on her lips before they made contact with mine, her face mere millimeter of mine and her breath on my fingers, "If we're going to do this, we will do it on my terms," I paused to see if she wanted to add something and when she didn't, I kept talking. "You just said that you just want to know me more and spend more time with me?" At my question, she nodded, my fingers still on her lips, "Well, then no kisses or any caresses and most importantly ... no sex." Her eyes didn't change their intensity and for a moment there I thought that she hadn't listened to me well.

Then she kissed the tips of my fingers and took my hand, "It's a good thing I'm not just looking for you for those things, then." It was her response and I remember feeling confused and almost disappointed, I clearly wanted to gain a reaction from her and that didn't happen.

"Seriously? Is that all you're going to say?" She shrugged as if dismissing it. "Callie, I'm telling you we'll basically be just friends and you telling me you don't care?"

She laughed, "I did not say I didn't care, but if those are your terms, I'm willing to accept them just to be with you." She said, certainty in her words. "You're more than just a body, Arizona, I don't want to be with you just because of what your body can offer me, I'm not like that and you, Amor, are more than just that." She got up walking to the door to leave, not before saying, "Although, I'm not going to deny that I've imagined in my mind multiple ways to please you." She leaned over the couch, speaking directly into my ear, giving me a sonorous kiss on my flushed cheek, "Good night, Arizona."

That was then and this is now, do you think that deal worked for me? Yeah, don't answer that, it's just a rhetorical question.

"Arizona, where did you go just now?" Callie's voice brought me back to the present, a present in which she is about to tell me something that will surely be dramatic. What can I say, you chose to stay for the drama and now you must keep up.

"Just say what you have to say, Callie." I said bored and frustrated with so much detour.

She gave me a guilty look once more before continuing, "Well ... Sarah wants to have a baby."

You see, dramatic ...

Wait… WHAT?