Hellsing Chronicles

A Hellsing Fanfiction

Sapphirewyren

Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing

Hellsing Law & Order AU

Seras had always wondered about Sam's nicknames for the team, but she remembered the time that she threatened to start calling Alucard 'Fish Nets'. So Seras decided that she was going to find out once and for all. But Alucard was not happy to relive that again. But Sam decided to tell the story anyway.

LMPD Headquarters 2049 AD

Alucard strolled into Integra's office and said, "My beautiful Captain, I have wonderful news."

"You're going to finally stop fawning over me?"

"Even better, I have signed us up to be one of the couples in the couples costume theme for the department Halloween party."

The silence in the office was deafening, "You did what. ?"

Alucard repeated his 'good news' and the Captain exploded, "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?! WHY WOULD YOU DO SOMETHING SO STUPID?"

Alucard ran out of the office, but Integra followed him out, "COME BACK HERE SO I CAN BREAK YOUR BLOODY NECK, YOU HORSE FUCKING CUNT BUCKET!"

The rest of the squad looked up in surprise; the only time their boss swore like that was usually when she was talking to Maxwell.

"What the heck did you do, Alucard?" asked Pip.

"I just entered the beautiful captain and I in the couples…"

"Now why would you do that?" interrupted Sam. "I wanted me and Baby Cakes to go as a couple."

"Dare I ask what the costumes are?" asked Walter.

Why as Bride and Groom of course" came the answer along with an idiotic grin.

"IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOUR BRAIN, YOU ASS?!"

"It gets worse" said Pip, who had just read the email, "Once you sign up, you can't back out."

"And everyone is going to see that signup sheet" sighed Walter.

With a groan, Integra sank into a chair, "Alucard, I really want to shoot you."

"I thought that it would make you happy."

"No, it made you happy, Alucard. You weren't even thinking of Baby Cakes."

"Nor did you even ask her" said Walter.

Alucard looked ashamed, as he should be. For Integra there was no way of backing out and she didn't even celebrate Halloween nor go to department parties. But now it was practically expected for her to show up and in a costume, as a bloody bride! There was no way in hell she was going to do that! This would be so humiliating! What the hell was Alucard thinking? This would be embarrassing….embarrassing…Then Integra got an idea, a truly ghoulish idea. "Alucard, I will do this asinine thing with you -on one condition-I get to choose the costume."

"But I already…"

"You want me to go or not?"

Alucard's shoulders slumped, "Fine."

"Good. The next time you do something like this, you will be searching for a new job."

"So Sweet Cakes, what's the costume?"

Integra smirked, "You'll have to come to the party to find out."

Halloween- LMPD

It had been a whole two weeks of whispers and guesses of what Alucard and Integra would be for the costume part since the sign up sheet had shown that would be a change of costume. Many thought that the captain would simply not show up and just ignore the whole thing. No matter how hard people tried they could not get a word out of the captain about what costume she would wear, not even a hint. And since Integra kept even her squad in the dark, there was no help from them. At the party everyone was waiting for Integra and Alucard but after a half hour, it seemed as if they were a no show and the people went on with the party, with Maxwell saying that she was not worth waiting for anyway.

The party was in full swing when suddenly the doors were slammed open causing everyone to look in thsir direction. What they saw caused mouths to drop to the floor and I think Sam was panting like a dog. Integra and Alucard wore all black leather.

Integra wore a black leather corset top , with knee high boots, shorts so short they could be underwear, gloves that went up to her elbows, a black military hat cocked sideways, around her neck a leather choker with silver studs and smoking a thin cigar.

Alucard was the epitome of a tied up, masochist sex toy. He wore just leather straps and buckles strapped around his torso. He wore skimpy leather shorts, probably the same size as Integra's because EVERYTHING could be seen, along with fish net stockings and black sandals. To top it off, Alucard had a ball gag in his mouth and a collar attached to a long black leash held by his 'mistress'. And every time Alucard looked like he was going to rebel, he got a slap on the ass with the black riding crop Integra had, which was every ten minutes.

Pip was the first to speak or at least make a sound, which was a wolf whistle. "I like this way better than Alucard's original idea" said Sam. "Oh Sugar Hips, that costume is making me horny."

Walter sighed, "Really now Integra do you really think that is an appropriate costume?"

"There were no specifics on what costume a person could wear."

"True, but still …."

However Integra was no longer paying attention to Walter and had turned to Alucard, taking the leash off of his collar, she said, "Pet, be good boy and get me something to drink, I'm parched." The tall man nodded eagerly and pretty much ran to do Integra's bidding.

"Some reason I think he's enjoying this" said Pip.

"Of course he is; I'm showing a lot of skin."

Just then Enrico approached them, "Typical whore to dress in such a manner."

"Typical asshole to gawk" replied Integra. "Keep your eyes up here, pig."

The whole night was one of morons staring at Integra and Alucard and remarks both negative and well negative.

Back to the Present

By the time Sam had finished the story, Seras was red in the face, "You're making that up, and Sir Hellsing would never dress that way."

"I have pictures" said Sam taking out her phone. Pip grinned; "So do I."

"You guys are terrible."

"We were hoping that she would dress up again, but she was banned from all holiday functions at LMPD" said Sam with a sigh. "Well at least I have the pictures. And after seeing Alucard in those fish net stockings, I couldn't help myself"

"I would prefer the nickname "Captain Hellsing's Love Slave" said Alucard.

"I just hope she got rid of that ridiculous costume" said Walter as he and Integra entered.

As Seras scrolled through Sam's photos, she asked "Sir did you wear underwear under those shorts?"

Integra chuckled, "I had to sacrifice one article of clothing for the other."

"Sir!" gasped Walter.

"Stop worrying Walter, I disposed of the outfit."

"That's good to know."

As Walter left, Integra said, "I did keep the boots though."

Chapter End