Kate and Bridie both remain motionless, even though the car has long since been parked, and Kate wonders if, like her, Bridie had been taken aback at their car trip already being over. After all, they'd seemed to arrive in no time flat and now they were both froze, Bridie's hands clutching at her seatbelt as though prepared to fight anyone that tries to remove it, and Kate, knuckles white against the steering wheel.
But it's Bridie to break the silence. Always Bridie, so much braver than Kate, and even though her voice is wobbly she keeps going. "It'll be okay, Mum." She murmurs, and it's this - the bizarre role-reversal that snaps Kate into action.
"I know you've said you want to meet her, but if you've changed your mind," Bridie makes to open her mouth, but Kate ploughs on, "or you find when we're in there that you've changed your mind, then we can leave, okay? You only do this if it's what you want."
Bridie nods solemnly, and Kate spies a pair of bumblebee earrings in her ears that she realises must be a loan from Rose. Bridie's finger touches each one of them as if they are a talisman.
"And... and Claire? She... she's not..." Bridie trails off again, fidgeting with a hole in the upholstery of the car seat.
"I don't know, Bee. Sav was going to talk to her." Kate sucks in a breath as she turns towards the building, and it's odd, really, how imposing a building can be, even in the bright sunshine of Cairns. "I never imagined I'd be doing this." She admits before she can really think about it. She can feel Bridie's gaze on her and she digs her nails into her thighs because she has to be the strong one here. "I always thought... well, that this was... a part of my life I'd closed. I never imagined..." She trails off once more. A second later, Bridie's hand reaches over and rests itself on Kate's, and in spite of her nerves Kate stops digging her nails into her leg.
"You did what you had to." Bridie murmurs. "And now, I've got to do what I have to."
"You don't have to do this." Kate hastens to assure her. "This was never something that you should feel you have to-"
"I have to do it for me." And despite the slight shaking of her hands and the slightly-quieter-than-normal voice, Kate has never seen Bridie's eyes so determined. "It's something I have to do, Mum."
Kate can't cry. Won't cry. Has to be strong. And so she nods and grips her daughter's hand a little tighter. "Then we'll do it together."
There is no tearful greeting, no instant connection. The girl - woman, Bridie supposes - sitting in front of her is not in a million years anything that Bridie would have imagined to be a sister.
For the most part, Bridie sits and observes as her mother and Savannah talk, all the while peering at Sav and trying to detect any similarities between them. But everything about Savannah seems at odds with Bridie. Sav's hair is sleek and shiny while Bridie's is a curly mess. She drinks green tea while the mere thought of it turns Bridie's stomach. She nibbles daintily while Bridie usually eats with gusto. And it's not just that. When they get past the awkward introductions and Sav fills them both in on her life, it's clear she's smart, concise and confident in a way Bridie doesn't ever feel she'll be.
No. All in all, Bridie feels she might just have more in common with Mike Flynn than she does with this woman who is supposedly her half-sister.
Bridie knows if she was as romantic and poetic as Rose, she'd be able to wax lyrical to herself about making your own family, or about how blood is not always thicker than water. But she can't deny the small pang of loss.
And it's not as though she's really starved for company. Sure, she'd always dreamt of siblings when she was younger, but she'd always had her Mum and Cal, plus the family that always surrounds a firehouse. And now that Rose and Mike were in their lives she was happier than ever. But even so, it doesn't mean she hadn't hoped for something... something more.
"Bridie?" Kate's voice breaks through her thoughts and she jumps so much she very nearly knocks over her drink. "Are you okay?"
"I... uh..." She tenses, then forces a smile, turning to Sav. "Uh, can I please use your bathroom?"
Kate watches her daughter disappear from view and almost has to restrain herself from following. Her fingernails once more find her thighs and she relishes in the pain of it, because it keeps her grounded. Biting her lip, Kate turns back to Sav, and is taken aback to see tears swimming in her eyes.
"None of this should have happened." She murmurs, more to herself than Kate. And in spite of the vagueness of her words, Kate knows exactly what she means. "What he did was... was evil. Pure evil."
"But if he didn't, then I wouldn't have her." Kate turns her gaze towards the spot where Bridie has disappeared. "And I'd never wish her away."
"So I'm supposed to be sad that he didn't get my sister pregnant too?" Sav snaps back. Kate blinks, and a moment later Sav deflates. "Sorry." She mutters, dragging a hand through her hair. "I just... seeing her. It's... it's made it all so much more real."
"We can leave if that's what you need." Kate makes to stand. "If it's too much for you having us here."
"That's not what I meant." Sav turns her gaze towards the hallway where, Kate knows, Claire is closeted in one of the rooms. "How do I help her Kate?"
Bridie washes her hands and looks up, peering at herself in the mirror. Once more, she finds herself taking in her reflection, trying to connect her features to her mother and aunt. She traces a finger down her nose, her cheeks. She fingers her ears, her hair, examines the shape of her eyebrows and her knobbly elbows. Everything that she is, this collection of cells and DNA seems to suddenly be in question, and she finds herself wondering what her mother sees when she looks at her. Does she see herself, or does she see the face of the man that must surely haunt her memories.
The door is pushed open and Bridie jumps, spinning around so suddenly that she knocks a jar of handcream to the ground. "Crap! Sorry!" She mutters, stooping to pick it up. "I was just-" She freezes, because the face of the girl in front of her isn't that of Savannah or her mother. Claire is nothing like her sister, half-hidden behind dark hair and an oversized hoodie, and Bridie takes a step back. "Claire?"
Claire's hands reach out to grip the basin, staring at her fingers. "I didn't realise anyone else was in here. You didn't lock the door."
"Oh." Bridie takes a step back. "Sorry."
"You're... you're her aren't you?" She spits the words like poison, and Bridie takes another step back. "His daughter?"
"He'll never be my father." Bridie's words escape her before she can stop them, and she's surprised at the venom in her tone. For a moment she and Claire simply look at each other, then Bridie gestures towards the door. "I'll leave you. Sorry to... you know... exist." She's unable to keep the bite from her tone as she makes towards the door, but before she's made it two steps, there's a sob, and Claire's black locks have whipped past her and out of sight.
Bridie leans against the wall in the bedroom, her eyes scanning the single bed pushed up against the opposite wall, and the nest of blankets and pillows beside it that Claire has sunk back into, still shuddering and shaking. The blinds are drawn, and the lack of light makes it difficult for her to discern whether Claire has reacted at Bridie following her.
She wonders whether she should just go back to get Savannah, or her own Mum. Anyone would be better at trying to speak to her, and yet there's some sort of pull she can't quite put into words that spurs her closer. Bridie stops at the pile of Manchester and tentatively kneels down. "Claire?" She murmurs. "It's... it's Bridie. Do... do you want me to get Savannah? Or... or my Mum? I..." She throws another look at the door, but no one else has come to rescue her. Edging slightly closer, Bridie rests a hand on Claire's shoulder, realising all too soon that this is a mistake.
"I don't need anything from you!" Claire snaps, and although her voice is muffled by the bedding, it does nothing to distinguish the anger.
Bridie swallows and withdraws the hand. "I... I want to help, Claire. I... I can-"
She doesn't even see it coming. One minute she is kneeling beside Claire. The next she is knocked flat on her back as a hand pushes her backwards, and she's faced with Claire's furious face. "You're a mistake! Don't you see that? You're worse than that! You're evil! Disgusting! And-"
"Claire!" A clatter of footsteps and several moments of confusion as people move all around her. "Claire, get off her!" The next thing Bridie knows is her Mum dragging her backwards, pulling her back into the hallway.
"Are you okay? Did she hurt you?" Kate turns Bridie's face to look into her eyes. "Bee, what happened?"
"I..." Bridie turns towards the door but catches only a glimpse as Savannah closes it behind her, disappearing from view.
"Come on." Kate mutters, tugging her by the hand back towards the lounge room. "Come on." She repeats, as Bridie hovers, looking back. Kate's hand is shaking, her voice quivering with fear. It isn't until they are standing on the front step outside that Kate wraps her in a tight hug, tears splashing into her hair. "I'm sorry, Bee." Bridie says nothing, still ridiculously numb. Taking in another shaky breath, Kate straightens up. "We... we need to go."
I'm so sorry, Kate. She's still getting overwhelmed, and seeing B was probably too much today. She's sleeping now. Thanks for making the effort. - S
Kate pockets the phone without replying, her hands still shaking and barely comprehending anything else that is happening around her. A moment later a hand touches her and she flinches, very nearly spilling her coffee down her. "Shit." Mike mutters, taking a step back and holding his hands up as though she is brandishing a gun. "Sorry. Kate... I was just..."
She deposits her coffee none-too-gently upon the coffee table, liquid sploshing from the mug and settling upon the glassy surface. But she doesn't care. Can't bring herself to think about anything other than her daughter down the hall. "She got hurt."
"Bridie?" Mike frowns, kneeling in front of her and tucking a finger underneath her chin so that she looks more directly at him. "Kate, what-"
"Claire attacked Bridie. She said... awful things. And Bridie..." She sucks in a breath, eyes shut tight against the memories of the day. "I don't want her thinking that it's true."
"Bridie or Claire?" Mike questions. Kate twitches as though trying to shake off an irksome fly, not quite able to deduce just which one she feels more pity for, or which girl she feels more worry for. "Kate, Bridie knows you love her. Hell, I think it's the first thing she ever learned. And the words of someone who is..." Kate jerks her head up, ready to defend Claire against some slight upon her character. "Well, the word of someone who is suffering just as much as you did with nothing good to drag her from the darkness. You... you had to deal because of Bridie. But she... she's stuck."
"I can't help her." Kate murmurs. "I have no idea how I can help her."
"Sometimes..." Mike moves forwards and this time she permits him to hold her. "Sometimes Kate, all you can do is be someone who helps pick up the pieces."