Spring Break snuck up on them. Root wasn't sure where the year had gone, but she was too happy to care. Shaw had stayed with her for a couple weeks before talking to Alicia and Mr. Ingram again. They'd made up. Apparently, they cared more about keeping Shaw close than they did about keeping Root away.
Shaw was staying at their house again, and Root had practically moved in, too. It was nice to be taken care of. She was also happy to escape the terrible feeling that filled her own house. Maybe she would look her parents up soon. The last time they'd taken money out of their bank account had been in Norway, just before they'd disappeared. She pushed the thought from her head, and focused on the trees outside the window.
They were driving out to the woods to camp for the week. Shaw was driving beside her, the boys spread out in the back two rows. Root was glad that Shaw had such a large car. They'd filled the truck with camping gear and left town early Saturday morning.
She shifted in the front seat, tucking a leg under herself and pushing her upper body out the window. She closed her eyes and smiled into the sun as the wind blew her hair. It was early April and the weather was perfect. Sunny, breezy, and warm. Root was more excited about this camping trip than she'd been about anything in a long time.
She felt a hand softly grab the clasp of her bikini top. She looked back at Shaw, eyebrows raised.
"Not with the boys here, Sameen," Root teased.
Shaw scowled. "I'm just making sure you don't fall out the window. This seemed better than sticking my hand down your shorts." Everyone laughed and Shaw let go, putting her hand back on the clutch. "Whatever, jerks."
Root smiled and slid back down into her seat, putting her seatbelt back on. "Thanks for not letting me die, babe."
John leaned forward from the back seat. "Relax, Shaw. It's spring break. If one of us doesn't get injured, we've failed."
"Not it," Lionel snorted. "It should be Shaw. She'll heal before we even get home."
Shaw slid her eyes to Root, meeting her gaze. They'd talked a little bit more about the weird stuff that had happened to them and come to no real conclusion. None of the 'magic' had been bad, and healing quickly was a bonus. It wasn't like Shaw could bring it up to her foster parents.
Root shrugged, smiling tightly. She wasn't sure what to say to that. They hadn't brought it up to the boys. What would they even say? 'We think Shaw might have magic'? Root had done some research into what was going on, but so far, nothing had come up. There wasn't exactly a lot of scientific work being done on spontaneously gaining magic powers.
Root thought about her house. Ever since Hanna died, and her parents abandoned her, she'd felt like the house was evil. There was something wrong, she felt, in that house, but Root could never figure out what. Root had cleaned the house top to bottom, but it still felt dirty. At least now that Shaw had felt it, too, Root knew it wasn't all in her head.
Root shook her head, snapping out of her thoughts, and caught the end of Shaw's sentence.
"…in the lake?" Sameen looked at Root expectantly.
"Sorry," Root blushed, "I was distracted."
"I asked if you wanted to go for a swim in the lake." Shaw repeated, glancing between Root and the road.
"Oh, sure!" Root smiled. "Will we have enough daylight?"
Harold nodded. "We're only about 30 minutes away. We'll have a few hours before sunset."
Shaw whooped loudly, surprising the rest of the group. She drummed her hands on the steering wheel. "Swimming, shooting, and s'mores!"
They all laughed at her enthusiasm. John had brought a couple of his father's rifles. They were going to teach Shaw to shoot, and do some target practice. John was the best shot she knew. Root leaned her head out the window and let the wind wash over her.
A little while later, they'd parked and set up camp. Harold and John went into their tent. Lionel went to his and Root and Shaw headed for the lake.
"I hope it isn't too cold," Shaw groused as they neared. "I'd still swim, but I would be grumpy."
Root laughed, stopping at the edge of the woods. The ground turned to rocky sand and sloped gently into the water. Luckily, it didn't seem too buggy. Root stepped forward and dropped onto the rough ground.
She started pulling her shoes off. "It's barely spring, I'm sure it'll be freezing."
"What?" Shaw stared at her incredulously. "Freezing? Why did you suggest this then?"
"Um," Root dropped her shoes and jumped up. She pushed her shorts off. "Swimming was your idea."
"Whatever," Shaw dropped their towels on the ground and ripped her clothing off. "Let's go."
Root looked her over. Shaw was in the same white bikini she'd worn at Harold's pool party. That party felt further away than three months ago. It was a different time. Shaw hadn't almost died, Root hadn't danced with a girl before, or fallen asleep in a field. She hadn't done all the things with Shaw that had brought them closer.
She felt Shaw take her hand and looked down. She looked up at Shaw, confused.
"The water is fucking freezing. Let's go up to that ledge and jump in." Shaw point at a rocky platform jutting out above them.
Root nodded and let Shaw drag her up the hill to the platform. The area they were in was beautiful. Spring had come early to Connecticut, so all the trees were lush and green.
Shaw leaned forward, peering over the edge. "It looks higher from up here."
"Scared, Sameen?" Root teased.
"No," Shaw grunted petulantly. "Ok, count to three and then jump."
Root adjusted her grip on Shaw's hand and started counting. "One…two-"
"Three!" Shaw screamed and launched them over the edge.
Root grinned as they fell, feeling weightless. They hit the water with a loud splash and Root let go of Shaw's hand as she spun underwater. She shook her head to reorient herself and swam to the surface. Shaw's laugh reached her ears.
"That was amazing!" Shaw hooted, smiling like a maniac.
"Yeah, but it's so cold." Root shivered in the freezing current.
"Come here." Shaw tugged Root toward her and wrapped her legs around Root's waist. She put her arms around Root's shoulders. "Huddle for warmth!"
Root treaded water, trying to keep them both afloat. "I think you're just trying to drown me again."
"Nope. Just testing your abilities," Shaw joked, pushing her hair back and looking around. "Do you think we could make a swing? We brought that extra rope."
"Maybe," Root said. "We can ask the boys when we're done swimming." Root suggested, keenly aware of Shaw's chest against her own. "Do think this water is sanitary enough for sex?"
She looked at Shaw's face, gasping softly when she met Shaw's eyes. They were so close, Root thought, and the droplets on Shaw's mouth made Root lick her lips. She watched Sameen do the same.
Shaw's face dipped down, her breath tickling Root's face. They kissed softly, and Root felt like they had all the time in the world. Her legs moved through the water, keeping them up. The water seemed to warm around them as they kissed, and Root smiled.
Pulling her head back, Shaw looked at her, a small smile on her own lips. "What?" she asked, quietly. Around them bird song filled the trees. Shaw ran a hand over the surface of the water. "Did it get warmer?"
"I don't know." Root's smile widened. "Maybe our kisses sparked your magic. That's new."
Shaw rolled her eyes fondly. "You're just calling every coincidence 'magic' now."
"My girl's got powers!" Root laughed. "Maybe we can spend the summer testing them out. Some experiments would definitely help us figure things out."
"Yeah," Shaw muttered. She frowned at Root. "We still haven't talked about what I'm going to do. My birthday is in a month."
Root's heart beat hard in her chest, and she pushed Shaw away, watching her dip into the water as she lost her hold around Root's waist. Every reminder that this could all end physically hurt her, and she hated how vulnerable she was. She had thought now that Shaw had seen her house, they could just be roommates. It seemed the easiest solution until college, but apparently Shaw still needed to decide.
Shaw resurfaced, pushing her hair back. She was keeping her face carefully blank, and it made Root's stomach twist into knots. Everything had been going so well, and now she was afraid Shaw was just going to break up with her to get it over with.
"Root," Shaw started, "I like you a lot. I'm just not sure I want to spend the rest of my life in your shitty town."
"Neither do I," Root answered. She swam backwards, putting some distance between them. "It's only another year. I turn 18 right after graduation. My birthday is in August, by the way. Not that you've asked."
Shaw winced. "Sorry."
"Whatever." Root angrily kicked her legs underwater. "I know we're young, and barely girlfriends, but it'd be nice if you thought of someone other than yourself."
"Hey," Shaw snapped. "That's uncalled for."
Flushing, Root sighed. "I know. I'm sorry. I'm just… It feels like I never get a say in what happens to me. Hanna was an accident. My parents just left. Now, you're thinking about your future, and leaving, and I'll just have to deal with your decision."
Shaw swam to her, taking Root's hands, and putting them around her shoulders. She lifted Root, letting her wrap her legs around Shaw's waist. Staring up into Root's eyes, Shaw smiled. "I'm trying to talk to you, dummy. I'm not breaking up with you, or telling you that I'm leaving. I'm trying to talk to you about what I'm going to do."
Root took a deep breath, resting her forehead against Shaw's. "Thank you. Maybe we can talk when we get back? I want to have fun this week before we have to deal with the real world."
Shaw frowned, but she nodded, her wet forehead sliding against Root's. "Yeah, ok. We are going to talk about it, right? I'm not going to just disappear on you, but I need to figure my life out."
"Yeah, Sameen," Root breathed. "We'll talk about it." Her stomach clenched again, and she leaned away from Shaw. "Do you think I could have some time alone? I just need quiet."
Pursing her lips, Shaw nodded, letting Root untangle herself. "You're ok?"
Root nodded, and Shaw gave her one last look before swimming to shore. She climbed out of the water, squeezing her ponytail and releasing a surprisingly large splash of water. Despite being sad, Root smiled. Shaw stepped back into her shorts, and slipped her feet into her shoes. With one last look at Root in the water, she started back through the forest to their camp.
Taking a deep breath, Root sunk into the lake, letting the warm water swirl around her. She hated how crazy she felt. She wasn't usually overly emotional or sensitive, but something about Shaw brought that out in her. She wanted to be with Shaw more than she'd ever wanted anything before.
That wasn't healthy, though, and the logical part of Root's brain knew that. She knew that she couldn't pin all her happiness on one person, make them her reason for living, but that's what she was doing. It felt like something had changed in her the first time that they'd kissed and she didn't know how to go back. She closed her eyes.
If she really dug through her mind, she could remind herself of the other important things in her life. She wanted to work with computers. She wanted to invent something no one else had even thought of. She wanted to experience the world. If her focus wavered, even a little bit, her mind was flooded again with thoughts of Shaw. Root didn't know if this was love, or something else.
She just wanted it to be over. High school, heartbreak, hardship. Root wanted to be an adult, and live somewhere other than her house that felt like death. She knew she was better than pining after someone and waiting for her life to start. She just didn't know how to move forward.
Why did Shaw get to be the only with magic powers? Why did everything come so easily to her, and so hard to Root? Shaw was athletic, and beautiful, and calm. Everything Root wasn't. Root wished she could make the snow stop or crush metal or lift bigger people off the ground. Anger started to fill her, making her heart race, and her body feel hot.
She realized that it wasn't her body that was hot, but the water around. Panicking as her skin began to burn, she gasped, forgetting that she couldn't breath underwater. Instead of choking, though, she breathed easily, the water feeling light as air. Root looked around, realizing that her skin wasn't burning at all. There were strings of red light around her, wrapping around her body and pulling her downwards.
She relaxed for a moment, letting them gently tug her down. A soft voice filled her head like a thought, unfamiliar and familiar at once. It told her how nice the bottom of the lake would be. She wouldn't have to worry about Shaw anymore, or school, or her parents. Wouldn't it be nice to just rest for a little while? Everything didn't have to be a fight.
Root closed her eyes, smiling. She really was exhausted, tired all the way to her bones. It would do her some good to get some sleep. She could worry about the future later, when she wasn't tired anymore. She let the voice fill her, accepting it into her mind and letting the warmth fill her veins. The water around her seemed to hold her gently, lulling her like a warm bed.
Her hand jerked up on its own, and Root opened her eyes again, watching as her body pulled itself up. She kicked her legs, struggling to go down again. She wanted to sleep. The red light was so kind; it wanted what was best for her. She tried to pull her hand back.
Then, another hand appeared above hers. As soon as their fingers touched, the red light disappeared from around Root, and her exhaustion disappeared. The fog in her mind cleared and she gasped again. This time, water poured into her lungs and she felt like she was drowning. The hand closed around hers and hauled her upwards.
They surfaced and Root started coughing. She was overwhelmed, arms and legs splashing helplessly as she tried to breath and stay up right. Something wrapped around her waist, pulling her back and she let it, focussing on getting the water out of her lungs and replacing it with air. After a moment, her legs dragged against an uneven surface and she turned, collapsing onto the rocky sand of the small beach.
She coughed up water, throat burning as it worked. Feet appeared in her vision and then gentle hands were pushing hair out of her face. Root sucked in air, trying to calm down, but she wasn't sure what had happened or how long she'd been underwater. When she could breathe again, she collapsed onto her side, lying on the rocks.
Shaw kneeled beside her, looking worried. Root almost smiled at the fact that Shaw looked something other than calm, angry, or amused. Instead, she put a hand on Shaw's thigh, curling her legs up to her chest.
"What were you doing?" Shaw breathed, taking Root's face in her hands. "You've been gone for almost an hour."
Root looked up at the sky and saw that it was darkening, the sun just above the treeline. She didn't know where the time had gone. It had felt like seconds. How long had she been sinking in the lake?
"There was a light," she rasped, voice hoarse from coughing. "It wrapped around me. It was so warm."
"Wrapped around you?" Shaw repeated, brushing her thumbs over Root's cheeks. "I saw a light in the lake, that's why I went in. It didn't see it wrapping around you, though. It was…"
Shaw's voice trailed off, and Root dropped her head to the side to look at her. "What?"
Shaw hesitated, licking her lips. "Your eyes were red. Really bright. Just like my nightmares."
"I've got magic, too," Root cheered weakly. "Magic girlfriends."
"Your magic tried to kill you, Root." Shaw sighed, her shoulders slumping. "My magic protects us. What brought it on? Were you angry?"
Root didn't answer immediately. She didn't want to tell Shaw about how she felt. 'I'm unhealthily obsessed with you, and I know it, but I can't do anything about it,' probably wouldn't go over well. She wondered, not for the first time, if their emotional connection was what triggered the magic. Why was Shaw's protective and hers harmful?
"I was stressed," Root said instead, only half-lying. "You can be stressful."
"I'm sorry," Shaw murmured, sounding sincere. She gave Root a small smile. "I was setting up the s'mores before I came to check on you. Want to go back to camp and get warmed up? I'll put marshmallows right into your mouth."
Root sighed, nodding. "Ok, Sameen. That sounds nice."
Shaw helped her up carefully, wrapping an arm around her waist. "Leave your stuff. I'll come get it later."
They crossed the rocky beach, and Root felt a little bit better. She didn't want to think about what would have happened if Shaw hadn't come to check on her. What was that voice that she'd let into her head? Would she have drowned in the lake? She didn't know why her magic wanted her to die. It almost seemed like the opposite of Shaw's. Maybe it was. Maybe they were polar opposites, drawn together like magnets. Maybe that's why Alicia wanted to keep them apart.
Root couldn't think about that right now. Instead, she focused on Shaw's arm around her, and the crunch of leaves under their feet. They would have a good spring break and then talk when they got back. Root wanted a little more time with Shaw before Shaw decided to leave her. She just needed time.
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Shaw lay awake in their tent, Root curled up against her side, and the sound of the woods filling the air. She was still thinking about what had happened at the lake. Root had been exhausted when they'd gotten back to the camp, only eating a couple of marshmallows before going to sleep. Shaw had just told the boys that Root wasn't feeling well.
After the boys went to bed, Shaw climbed into her tent, and tried to sleep next to Root, but she couldn't fall relax. When she'd gone to the lake, it had been almost boiling, and Root was nowhere to be seen. She'd almost turned back to go to camp and see if she'd just missed Root walking back, but something had made her stay.
Something had pushed Shaw forward, so strongly that she'd almost fallen to her knees. She'd somehow known that Root needed her and that the hot water wouldn't hurt her. When she'd run into the water, she could see a red light at the bottom. From underwater, it had almost been blinding. The closer she'd gotten to Root, the more a sense of dread had filled her, and she'd had to push herself forward against the feeling.
It had felt like anger, but it wasn't Shaw's. It was like when someone was listening to music on headphones and the music was so loud everyone else could hear it, too. She'd found Root panicking at the bottom of the lake, teeth bared, struggling even as her hand reached out to Shaw. Her eyes wide open and glowing red.
It was impossible now to deny that something was happening to them, Shaw just didn't know what. It had something to do with their being together. She hadn't been able to get anything else out of Alicia or Nathan. She'd only gone back to stay with them because she wanted to find out more about what they knew, but they'd been tight lipped about the whole thing.
Maybe it would be best for them to spend some time apart and get their feelings under control. Shaw could take a trip over the summer to give Root some space, and then come back for senior year. She wasn't willing to give Root up entirely. Shaw wasn't really sure what her life would be without Root now.
She didn't really want to leave anymore. It seemed like Root needed her, more than she needed a break. Shaw wasn't sure if that was enabling Root or taking care of her, but either way, it was the only thing she could think to do. Maybe they could take a trip together, and take Root out of their tiny town. They'd joked about going to Disney months ago.
Shaw sighed and rolled over, facing Root. Root frowned, whimpering in her sleep. Pulling her close, Shaw tucked Root's head under her chin. She was going to keep Root safe, in whatever way she could. Closing her eyes, she listened to Root breath until she fell asleep.