AN: Aaaaaannnd, one more sorta filler. Sorry.

Three more weeks into her one-on-one lessons with Annah'so and Isa, Leia found that she had attracted a new audience of eager learners. Not more children, Leia was relieved; she dreaded putting any weapon in the small, innocent hands of a child, though Rewa had insisted she trusted her girls and wanted them to have the skills to defend themselves. No, her newest subjects were half a dozen of the community's mothers. Nakia, Rewa, Himah, and even Isab stood among this group, ready and attentive.

"It's a good thing to know," Rewa reasoned when she'd first approached Leia to present the small group's request. "It is a common skill in the bigger parts of the galaxy, yes?"

"Sure," Leia allowed, "but Casita isn't part of the bigger galaxy! You have no need for blasters and weapons here." Perhaps, it was because Casita reminded her of Alderaan that she's fought Rewa on the matter and wrestled with the idea of bringing tools of war into the lives of Casita's people. Casita was a peaceful place full of kind and good-hearted people— just like Alderaan had been. But following the Empire's conquest of the galaxy, Leia's father had been forced to surrender a part of Alderaan's innocence and lend arms to his people, train them to protect themselves to defend the greater peace which Alderaan had stood for.

Rewa's argument was much the same. "We appreciate that you did not bring the war with when you came to us. But evil is destined to spread. We must be ready to protect our children and our home and our culture before they come from our blindside."

Thus, Leia found herself once again instructing individuals in marksmanship— this time to stay-at-home mothers twice her age. If nothing else, they were much more attentive listeners than the children, of course, but Leia was taken aback by their grit and resulting burgeoning skills. None of them were quite ready to face even the Empire's newest legion, but such a fine skill was no easy thing to learn later in life, and Leia admired the women for their commitment.

So, Leia spent her afternoon pacing behind the ladies, keeping a careful watch on their activity until Rewa insisted they end lessons for the day if it would convince Leia to rest. Granted that, at thirty weeks along, she forgot what comfort was, she quite preferred the exercise to sitting still and noticing the aches that consumed every joint in her body. But Rewa was prepared to throw a holy conniption if she didn't sit down, and the other women suddenly grew tired and recalled a chore list awaiting them. "Come now," Nakia gently coerced her, taking her by her elbow and steering her straight back for the residential area of the village. "And let me teach you an important skill. It's called 'getting rest while you can because you aren't going to have time to rest for much longer'."

"You know, the coddling is the one thing I don't miss while Han is gone."

Nakia smirked to herself. "He made me and Rewa promise we'd keep an eye on you while he's away."

"Of course, he did."

"Come on! I'm sure we can find something to entertain you while you rest. How about that blanket you've been working on? Have you finished—"

With surprising grace, Leia spun on Nakia, her expression wild as she posed a finger against her lips. "I haven't shown Han, yet."

"A surprise, huh?" She chuckled to herself. "And it's not even for him."

Leia shrugged. "He's so worried about— providing. He's spent all this time away, making sure we have things for the baby and our home. And I'm grateful for that, but … He's doing so much. He's doing everything, and I want to help. I wanted to be useful."

Nakia laughed, erupted into boisterous chuckles. "Honey, I'll bet you he's thinking just the opposite. You're carrying quite the load here." She gestured to Leia's protruding abdomen. "He recognizes that, and he's probably trying to measure up to what he sees you carrying."

They had reached Han and Leia's home, and Leia led Nakia into the sparse living room. "Fierfek, we're hopeless romantics."

"Absolutely doomed. There will be sappy tales written in the far future about your star-crossed romance."

"How gross."

Leia left Nakia in the living room while she wandered to the kitchen for a snack and drinks. She ignored the urge to grab the bag of chips Han had brought in from the Falcon's rations and picked a round fruit from the counter instead.

"How is the blanket going?" Nakia's voice chirped from the living room. "Are you almost done?"

Leia couldn't help her smile as she recalled her accomplishment and informed her friend, "I actually finished it last night." She waddled out to the living room, pointed at the rocking chair Han had built for her. "It's down there if you want to look at it."

Nakia lifted a small knitted blanket from the floor to admire the simple purple and green stripes on the white background. "Leia, this is gorgeous! I can't believe you've already finished it."

"I got bored last night."

"Bored?"

Leia pointed across the living room to where she'd set the cradle Han had also built. He'd carved out smooth rockers with columns lining each side, and Leia had taken to painting over the light wood with common Alderaanian motifs in pastels. "I also did that yesterday."

"How on Coruscant did you have time to do all this? I swear you spent most of the day outside—" Nakia's smile quickly vanished from her face, and she turned to Leia with a fair hint of frustration in her eyes. "Goddess, Leia! You haven't been sleeping?!"

"It isn't like I purposely stayed up all night! I couldn't sleep! I tried!"

"Oh, Leia!" Her voice echoed in her horror.

Leia shrugged, absentmindedly. "It's just a fact of my life. I sleep better with Han there."

"You have to tell him about the nightmares."

"There isn't anything to tell him. He already knows, and there's nothing more he can do about it. He can't prevent them."

"You have to get more rest, hon. You still have a couple of months before you get to stay up all night."

"I'm doing what I can."

Nakia gave the most dramatic sigh Leia had seen, and she hurried to help Leia into her rocking chair— another piece of Han's handiwork. "I should have known." She collapsed onto the floor, stared distantly across the room. You seem more tired when he's gone. And you're always looking for distractions."

Defeated, her shoulders slumped. "Don't tell Han. Please. He's going to start losing sleep if he knows I still have nightmares."

"He worries?"

"Too much. He loves worrying over me. And he doesn't need to."

"But you aren't sleeping when he's gone."

Absentmindedly, she continued to pick at her fruit, eyes downcast. "Han is the only person I've ever been able to discuss those matters with." Hoping she would get the hint that this wasn't a conversation Leia wanted to share with her, she added, "So, trust me, if I need to talk to him, I will."

Apparently taking the hint, Nakia nodded. "Well, anyway, I really like it. Are you painting the room, too?"

"Han doesn't even know I can paint. Not that I'm that into it. But we were only able to get so much done before he had to leave."

"Did you guys finish the nursery?"

"For the most part. Han finished the crib and the dresser, and he made a little toy box, too. It just looks so plain, and I want to decorate it more. Han said he would try to find what he could while he's away."

Nakia smiled brightly, encouragingly. "And then you're all set."

"Stars, I'm not so sure about that."

Appearing merely amused by her doubt, Nakia reassured her, "It's scary for a long time, but you're more prepared than you think you are. First time 'round, no one really knows what they're doing. Mistakes are inevitable, but I have faith in you that you won't let Han screw up your kid too much."

Leia shot her half a glare just for Han's sake, but she was sure her twisted grin was enough to betray her amusement. If his labors over preparing the nursery were any sign, Leia had no doubt he was going to make a wonderful father. Besides, it wasn't him she was so worried about. But she decided it was best to drop her anxieties for the time being. They still had plenty of time to prepare.

Before she could even prepare a defense in the father's honor, her and Nakia's exchange was interrupted as Rewa came hurrying in, demeanor and expression alight with excitement. Without any greeting or explanation, she laughed, "Guess who's back!"

The Falcon was still blowing stream from between her struts when Leia made her way over. Cub was resting right on her bladder, but stars be damned, she wasn't going to miss Han's first moments back home.

The first person she saw wasn't Han, but Dundu— unloading different crates down the boarding ramp. It was a surprise to see him returning at this time as well, and Nakia rushed forward to embrace her husband. He dropped his load to catch her, and Leia smiled as she watched the couple immediately meet at the mouth, entirely occupied in each other's presence. "What are you doing back?" the wife cried.

"I missed you and the children. So, when Han told me he could use some help transporting some cargo …"

Right on cue, Han came strutting down the boarding ramp, and Leia would have run if she could. In her shape, her best was a waddle, but she hurried for him, and he grinned when he saw her below. His smile was cocky as ever, that same mischief reflected in his eyes. The rogue face was framed in windswept dark hair and at least a week's worth of stubble— and Leia didn't even mind. He took three long strides— Leia counted them— and swept her into his arms, gently squeezing baby between. She struggled to stand on her toes, met him for a kiss, and his calloused hands ran a path from her face down her sides to her belly, as if reacquainting himself with her form. At last, Han's gaze wandered to their baby's current residence. "Cub's done a lot of growing since I left."

She covered his hands with hers. "You didn't miss much. There's still plenty of time for you to catch up." Leia reached to take hold of his face and pulled him down to her for another kiss, this one long and searing. Long, so she could savor the taste of him, the pleasantly rough caress of his lips interlocked with hers …

"Easy, Princess," he chuckled against her lips. "Like you said, we've got time." He laid one hand on her belly and Leia moved it to the lower swell where she was positive the head was facing. "Twenty—"

She shook her head, pressing his hand more firmly against her skin just as she felt movement from Cub. "Thirty exactly as of yesterday. Two and a half months to go."

A kind of warm and bewildered smile danced on his face just as they both felt motion there, something pressing back as if to say 'hello'. "Meanwhile, I brought back a few things I think you'll appreciate."

"Such as …?" His rugged face was shadowed in light stubble, and Leia was tempted to make a joke about him bringing back a razor, but she was too relieved that he was alive and in her arms to truly feel like making the jest.

He pulled her closer, roped her in with his arms, and offered a smile that looked more like a tease. "I got a few things for the nursery I think you'll like."

"I can't wait to see!"

"But that's not even the best part."

Leia raised a suspicious brow. "It gets better?"

He only grinned back as he turned to a particular crate and knocked on it. "Take a look."

To say she was curious was an understatement, and Leia could hardly stifle her excitement to see what treasure Han had returned with. She opened a crate and dug through packaging paper until she found its contents: just a few small bags of a lavender powder. All she could do was stare. Though she wasn't sure what she had been expecting, this certainly hadn't even been a thought. This has to be a joke. Alright, so she'd let him have his fun, but she couldn't find amusement in it.

"Han, these are drugs."

"Well, you don't have to say it like that." He reached in and cleared out the extra packaging and hefted a small baggy in his hand. "Painkillers."

She blinked.

It took her a second. Two, three, maybe six. She blinked again as if she hoped it would clear away this moment and Han would assure her he was only kidding. Surely, he wasn't serious. But she needed the clarification if only to provide Han his last chance to save himself. "For the birth?"

He nodded slowly but didn't appear any less confident and proud. "Yeah! I've been thinking about Rewa said when we got here about arrangements for the birth, and I know you've been worried about something going wrong. I don't have a solution to all those things, but I can at least fix one of them for you."

"With drugs."

She saw it— a flicker of understanding dawned on him as he at least realized that something was wrong. Bless his heart, he really was trying.

"Sure, if that's what you want to call it."

"That's what it is."

"What's wrong with it? I found you painkillers for when you go into labor, and you're mad at me?"

"I'm not mad at you, Han; I'm just trying to understand— or, make you understand. I'm not going to take spice while I'm in labor."

"Why— okay, yeah, it's spice, but it works as a painkiller. They use it in medcenters."

"And how much do you know about prescribing spice to patients? Or dosages? How could we begin to guess what that would do to the baby?" She turned her chin, glanced at him sideways. "You do realize that it could affect the baby."

She hadn't meant to attack Han so harshly, but Leia still felt like she'd had the rug pulled out from beneath her. It was a protection thing, too; she wouldn't let any harm come to her child. If anyone else had been the one to suggest this, she knew she would have been hysterical. But this was Han, and she stopped to remind herself that she knew Han wouldn't even suggest something like this unless he had a reason— and a good one, at that.

Stop. Breathe, Leia. Hear him out.

"Haven't you been through enough? Fierfek, Leia, you've been through hell how many times—"

"And I'm here, aren't I?"

"You've been through hell and back. Over and over and over. I got you medicine so this doesn't have to be like that."

"You got me drugs that are illegal in almost every civilized planet."

"You've heard Rewa tell you what it's going to be like—"

"Han—"

"And I don't want you to have to go through that—"

"Han!"

"I can't just sit there and watch that happen—"

"Han Solo, will you please shut up and listen to me!"

Leia became aware of their audience the moment the air turned still between her and Han. Chewie, Nakia, and Dundu were only left to stare at the couple, stand amidst the harsh tones and frustrated voices. In the same moment, while everything was silent, Leia's awareness flashed with anxiety, a confused, scared sort of anxiety, and she forced herself to take a breath, resting her hand on the curve of her belly. Slowly, the anxiety eased.

Han sighed, more from embarrassment than anything else, and stepped aside with her.

"Han," she spoke gently now, reached for his chin and forced him to look at her. "We're talking about pain. I've faced pain before. You know what I've been through." She gave him a moment, and she watched as his eyes followed down her frame until they settled on her hip. There on her skin was tattooed a six-digit number in red— the day she was supposed to die in the color of her threat level. The most permanent scar she had from her time on the Death Star. "I've dealt with unimaginable pain throughout my body, and I survived. I can handle a little more pain."

"You shouldn't have to suffer again."

"This isn't suffering, Han. It's just the way it goes, and, to be honest, I can't wait. Han, I have very few expectations for this birth. There is one thing I want out of this birth, and that's a healthy baby. That's it. I couldn't care less about the pain. If our baby is born healthy, I'll call the day a success."

"I want to— be useful."

She'd never heard his voice so soft, so broken though he still fought from showing it. He was scared, just as scared as she was.

Leia sighed. "I can't believe this makes me love you even more."

"Huh?"

She took his hand and started back for their home, pulled him to her side. "I have something I want to show you."

"I have a better gift. I promise. It's— useful."

"Hush, my scoundrel. It's my turn to trade gifts."

"Have you forgotten you're carrying it?"

Leia stopped just outside their home and turned back to face him. She could pick out the guilt, frustration, and helplessness all swimming in his eyes, dampening his trademark confidence. She hated that look on him. "Let's talk about everything you've done in the last thirty weeks. Okay? You've found us a home, a place where we're safe and we can raise our child without a worry, and a community full of support. You sacrificed your new clean record to provide for us." Stepping inside, Leia took him through the living room and began pointing out each piece of furniture. "You built that chair for me, and that cradle for the baby. You built everything in the baby's room: the crib, the dresser and changing table, the toy bin." She turned back to him and took his hands in hers, drew him closer. "I just want to show you how much I love you for it. Fierfek, Han! I love you for smuggling spice for me! I'm not taking that risk. But I still love you for it. And, I know it isn't much, but I got you something. A little piece of me trying to do my half."

"You don't have to do anything, Princess." His hands encompassed her belly, cradled their child in his sure palms. "You're doing more than I could ask for."

"That isn't how this works. We're equal partners, end of the story. This is our family, and we both give. So, just let me show you." She retrieved the knitted blanket from where she'd abandoned it on the couch and held it up by the top corners to show Han. "I made this. For the baby. Now, we have a baby blanket."

"You made that?" Leia gave herself a bonus point for his slack-jawed expression. His eyes roamed the small knit in wonder.

"While you were gone. I wanted it to be a surprise, but now seems as good a time as any to surprise you. See? I got one thing on our list taken care of."

He reached to touch the small blanket, rubbed the feather-soft wool between his fingers. "It looks great."

Leia draped it over her belly, smoothed out the folds. "Maybe just big enough. How about that?"

He nodded, eyes still stuck on Leia's handwork. "I bought a blanket from a shop on Kuat."

She laughed shortly. "We'll need more than one."

"I bought it from an Alderaanian refugee. I wanted it to be special. I wanted it to be the blanket. But this one is just as special."

Something about that made it all feel even more right, but Leia could hardly care if Han had gotten his blanket from a back alley on Coruscant. The knit fell from her grasp without a care, and she became consumed by the look in Han's eyes, the understanding of what this was all about. She was grateful— so grateful for the man before her, for the loving and devoted partner and father that he was. Oh, Cub, you lucky little one. You are the luckiest one of them all to have the daddy that you do. As am I.

"Equal partners."

He took another step closer to her, and Leia thought he was coming for another kiss, but he took her by surprise when he gently picked her up into his arms. "You're right. I've done a lot around here for you."

"You certainly have, flyboy."

"I think it's about time you pay me back some."

Her heart fluttered an extra beat, and she could feel the heat rushing to her face. She'd missed him. She'd missed him so much, and she'd longed for little else in the last several weeks than this … "You're right. What can I do to make it up to you?"

"I think you already know."

"But we'll be unequal again. We've both been deprived, I think."

"Then, let's see who wins."