NinjaTaleFan19: Thank you! Yeah, I wanted to show more of Mike and less of his alternate identities. I too think B should've gotten farther, but he needed to go for story reasons.
Witchinmoonlight: My posting schedule may be a little spontaneous, but I always aim to post on Fridays so people know when to check for it. Actually, Dawn's scare was the only reference to Three Zones and a Baby; Cameron's thing was just canon info. Yes, Dakota is back and working her first job, which she had to learn wouldn't be as glamorous as she thought. You may have a point about Cameron apologizing for the shock, but I think he may have forgot in the heat of the moment.
VickyT36: Yep, no toxic waste means no Dakotazoid.
Acosta perez jose ramiro: Unfortunately, your greatest weakness can sometimes lead to your greatest downfall.
MemeKing the Third: I'm glad I could do him at least a little justice by getting him a bit further.
AnonBrowser: It's a little bit of both for B, Dawn's kindness and friendship led to an attraction to her. Yeah, I got the sense that Brick and Jo had feelings for each other too, but were trying to be too tough to admit them. Interesting story recommendation, too bad it was taken down. I loved doing the scenes with Sam and Dakota; they are such a sweet pair. Glad you enjoyed Sam's mineral water fart, I didn't want to do Sky's burp from canon, so I obviously could only do it from the other end.
SideshowJazz1: Happy to make Truth or Scare better for you. It is significantly easier to make more enjoyable without Rodney. Yes, I'm a Bawn shipper; I always found the juxtaposition of their pairing really interesting- big, tech savvy B with tiny, nature savvy Dawn. People can ship whoever they want, though there are some pairings, like Dott, I will conclude are toxic. Sadly for B, some eliminations are really transparent. Yeah, there's some Jock stuff going on. I always thought they had something going on, so I figured I would address that while I had the chance. Not to mention it helps their character arcs, Brick becoming more assertive and Jo becoming kinder. Canon hit us with Zoke really fast, so I thought with Pahkitew Island having a slower pace, it would be natural to slow them down too. I'm pretty proud of my jab at Scottney; it was the nicest way I could say I don't support the ship without offending my readers who like the ship.
Critica7: Sadly yes, barring some monumental screw-up on someone else's part, B was never going to survive Truth or Scare. Half the challenge requires talking, but he feels uncomfortable about doing that. Personally, I don't think Brick and Jo hated each other. They just had a friendly rivalry of being the two strongest members on their team. While I disagree on Scott's strategy, I do give him credit for being effective. His plan had more thought than Mal or Sugar's strategies did.
Luna: Thank you! Mike is definitely adorably dorky.
That British Guy: That's fair.
Joel Connell: Glad you liked the chapter.
Derick Lindsey: I never read TotalDramaFan14's Pahkitew Island fic, so that's a happy coincidence. Scott hating Courtney was me poking fun at the fact that I don't support Scottney; I think he likes Dave more because he got his heart broken on national TV, which he thinks is hilarious. Dawn and Scott having that little moment doesn't change the fact that I believe a relationship between them would only be toxic. Interesting prediction of how Dakota is going to leave again. Yeah, no insane Clucky means no dark line about cooking chicken. Fair point about Scott's reaction to the tarantula being slightly different from Sugar's. Oh well, missed opportunity is a missed opportunity.
SilentSinger948: Yeah, B was doomed from the start of that challenge. Unless someone screwed up more, or he got lucky with scares. Yeah, lovely development of relationships all around.
BaseballCapClyde: Even just one more episode of B can make a lot of difference. I think he had a few moments of inventiveness, like leading his team in the first episode on the treehouse construction and using the slingshot in episode three. But not a whole lot of challenges allowed him to utilize his ingenuity due to their simplicity. Interesting prediction about elimination, let's see if you're right.
Guest: Glad you're enjoying the relationship developments.
As always, a friendly reminder that Cast Swap has a TVTropes page, that is always looking for additions and improvements. If you think something can be added or fixed, please go ahead.
Now with reviews out of the way, let's get dueling!
Disclaimer: I do not own Total Drama, or anything within the franchise. I only own a DVD of season one and a couple shirts.
Episode 5- X Marks the Winning Team
"On the last episode of Total Drama," Chris narrated as footage of the previous episode played, "it was a battle of Truth or Scare, judged by Clucky the poultry polygraph." Clucky was shown perching on Jo's knee, followed by her activating the team's shock remote. "Where they had to tell the truth, or complete a scary/disgusting scare." Scares from the speed round were shown, such as Brick feeding the iguana and Scott eating the tarantula. "Failure meant this would happen." Both teams were shown getting electrocuted by their shock collars.
Mike and Zoey were then shown leaning in for the kiss scare. "Looks like something is brewing between Mike and Zoey," Chris commented right when Sam's absurdly loud fart ruined the moment. He chuckled as the footage switched to the sudden death round between B and Cameron. "But, in the end it was B's cowardly silence and sausage fingers that lost it for Team Maskwak, and got voted off." B was shown having trouble undoing the little bag, followed by his blast from the Cannon of Shame.
The recap footage ended, showing Chris in present time as always.
"Who's next to let their team down in a hilarious and hurty way?" Chris asked. "Find out now on Total Drama Pahkitew Island!"
(cue intro)
When the theme song concluded, the show faded in on the early morning sun. A militaristic tune played in the background as Brick jogged through the woods, breathing heavily with every other step.
(Confessional- Brick)
"As the only soldier here with any military training, I've got a winning edge," Brick informed the audience. Putting a hand to his chin, he looked deep in thought. "My biggest competition out here is probably Jo since she's been wrestling with me over authority of our platoon, and she's the only other person I've seen go on morning jogs. Yeah, good thing we're on the same team." Raising a finger, he declared, "Like my drill sergeant always says 'Keep your enemies close and your rivals closer'- wait, I did that wrong. 'Keep your family close and your enemies at arm's length'? No, no, hold on…" Losing steam on his confident attitude, he put a hand to the back of his neck as he tried to figure the phrase out.
He continued to jog, closing his eyes to concentrate despite how hazardous that was. Unbeknownst to him, Jo was coming from the opposite direction several yards away. Also wanting to push herself harder, she screwed her eyes shut and sped up.
Somewhere above the two campers, a squirrel sat on a tree branch, inexplicably eating a chocolate bar while watching them. It watched the two joggers collide, and chittered in laughter at their twin groans of pain. Down on the ground, Brick and Jo were both sitting up and feeling their aching heads.
"Just did my morning 5K run. You?" Jo asked, hissing as she put her hand to her head.
Donning a cocky smirk, Brick pointed at her boastfully. "8K."
Not to be outdone, Jo got to her feet and clarified, "I mean I did an 8K warm up and a 5K on a full sprint."
Brick stood up and added, "My entire run was uphill."
"Yeah? Uphill with my eyes shut!"
"I ran backwards with earplugs!"
Jo gave him a weird look. "Why earplugs?"
"I dunno!"
Figuring she had won the little argument, Jo changed topics. "Team Kinosewak is lucky to have us. So far we've only lost one person compared to Team Maskwak's three." Resting a hand on Brick's chest, which the cadet was extremely aware of, she continued to say, "As long as we keep up the winning streak, we'll carry them all the way to victory."
(Confessional- Jo)
"I'll carry them to victory," the jockette corrected in the outhouse's privacy. "Just being nice so that aptly named clump of cadet meat will be loyal. But when the time comes…" she took a stick she had in both hands and snapped it into two. Letting out a quick yelp of pain, she snarled at one of her hands, "Ow, splinter! You little!"
Later that morning, Mike and Zoey were out foraging as they planned the previous day. Currently, the pair had found a cluster of blueberry bushes, and were filling up woven baskets with them.
"So yeah, waffles just have this texture that pancakes lack," Zoey was saying as she picked, "and this is going to sound really dorky, but when you get the round ones, it's really cool because it's a round food but it's got all the little squares inside. Know what I mean?"
Stationed at another bush, Mike dropped some berries into his basket. "Action movies, thinking waffles are better than pancakes… if you tell me that you like kickboxing, I may just have to marry you," Mike joked, smiling over his shoulder at her.
Zoey raised a hand to her mouth, giggling. Even the way she giggled made Mike swoon while she was distracted.
(Confessional- Mike)
The hopeless romantic sighed blissfully. "Zoey… she's all I can think about. I'm really glad that I volunteered to forage with her today; I could listen to her talk for hours."
With baskets full of food for their team, the pair began the long walk back to their campsite.
"Kickboxing is okay," Zoey said, throwing a teasing grin her teammate's way. "I actually prefer archery. There's just something about loading an arrow into a bow that feels so powerful." She sighed heavily, turning somber. "Too bad I'm the only girl in my school that likes it."
"Really? The only girl?" Mike raised an eyebrow at the claim. "You're exaggerating, right?"
"Sadly, no. In my town, unless a sport involves a ball, a field or rink, and going back and forth, they don't consider it a real sport. Which means if it's not baseball, basketball, soccer, hockey, or football," she ticked off her fingers as she listed the activities, "then support for that sport is pretty much non-existent. Except volleyball, that one is always under lots of debate."
"Yikes, my school back home is way more diverse than that," Mike winced.
"I think a lot of places are. My town just happens to be a jock town." Rolling her eyes, she added, "The jocks drive up and down Main Street every Saturday night, cheering for the football team."
"That sounds like it'd be fun," Mike said optimistically, trying to see the bright side of that.
"The first time you hear it you'd think so, but it gets old after a while if you're someone like me," Zoey replied. Stopping her walk, causing Mike to do so as well, she turned to face him and rubbed her free hand against her arm holding the basket. "While it'd be cool to win the show and get the money, I mostly came out here to make friends with other people that share my interests. You don't think that's stupid, do you?"
Mike's eyes widened. "What? No! I totally get it." Smiling gently, he continued, "In fact, you have made friends with someone else that shares your interests- me. Wouldn't you say that's a good start?" He gave her an encouraging smile. Zoey thought about what he said, and smiled back.
(Confessional- Mike)
"I understand how Zoey feels," Mike confessed, counting on his fingers. "Having no friends, uncommon interests like action movie sequels, reasons for joining reality shows not including the cash prize and fame… even if she doesn't want to date me in the end, I still want to be one of the friends she's looking for."
Zoey nodded her head. "Yeah, I'd say that's a great start. Thanks for saying that."
(Confessional- Zoey)
"Mike just… gets me," Zoey said, trying to use her hands to express how. "I was hoping that I'd find someone who wants to be friends with me out here because Total Drama is a magnet for oddballs. Mike happens to be the best result I could ask for. If he wants to be friends, then maybe the others will too?"
They continued to share a warm gaze until Mike remembered what they were doing.
Holding up his basket, he suggested, "We should get this food back to camp. Before Chris calls us for a challenge."
"Yeah," Zoey agreed, realizing that their team was probably waiting. "We better hurry."
The loudspeakers whirred to life, getting their attention along with the other campers' scattered around the island. Dawn had been examining some pears, Sam beside her to help forage for their team. Back at camp, Lightning had been doing push-ups while Scott whittled at a hunk of wood near their fire pit. Brick and Jo had just rejoined Cameron back at their team's shelter when they looked up at the noise.
"Wakey wakey, campers!" Chris greeted loudly. "Everyone gather down by the lake!"
The teams walked along the beach, the last few players from each group downing the last of their breakfast. Sam had his backup console out and was playing as he walked.
"Man, we have got to get our sha-game together," Lightning complained to Dawn and Scott, who were closest to him. "We've had two challenges and lost three of them. This wouldn't have rolled back home with Lightning's team."
Dawn held up a finger to interject. "We've had four challenges, but I concur. We must endeavor to do better."
Scott shrugged. "Maybe now that we've gotten rid of the weak links, we can actually achieve a winning streak. Staci was annoying, Dakota was useless, and B, that guy couldn't even talk when the points counted on it."
(Confessional- Scott)
"Really, all I have to do now is get Lightning out and then Dawn and Sam may as well jump in the Cannon of Shame before the next challenge even starts," Scott boasted, whittling as he talked. "I just have to create or find enough reason to target him."
Dawn scowled at the devious guy. "Our teammates were not weak links. They may have had their faults, but they were good souls."
"Whatever, fairy princess," Scott shot back. "The truth of the matter is they were holding us back, and now we can finally get something done." As he sped up to match Lightning's pace, Dawn slowed down to a halt.
Too focused on his game, Sam stumbled right into Dawn.
"Oof, sorry," Sam apologized, fixing his glasses as they went askew. He looked down at his remaining female teammate, who was frowning in Scott's direction. "You okay?"
"I'm fine," Dawn assured him, still staring hard. "It's just for the first time since arriving on this island, I've gotten a look at Scott's aura and I'm not sure if I like how it looks."
(Confessional- Dawn)
The moonchild rested her palms on her knees. "Scott's aura is one of the murkiest I've ever seen. I'll have to examine it more in order to get a clearer reading on it, but as far as I know now, it means he is trouble. The question is what kind of trouble."
Cameron walked between his teammates, his short height making him seem more like a kid among teens. Glancing between the pair of Mike and Zoey and the pair of Brick and Jo, he decided to speak up.
"So, pretty quiet morning back at camp," Cameron said, trying to make conversation. "How was the morning run?"
Jo rolled her eyes at the bubble boy. "Not that it concerns you or whatever, but it was perfectly fine. At least it was until Commander Crash here," she jabbed her thumb at Brick, "crashed into me from the other direction."
Brick raised half his unibrow, feeling challenged. "I beg your pardon, ma'am, but I believe it was you who crashed into me."
"Uh, I went for my run while you people were still asleep. So I was the one running first, ergo you were the one who crashed into me," Jo argued.
Zoey awkwardly stepped in, looking over at her conflicted teammates. "Um, if you were both running, isn't it both your faults? And isn't the more important thing that you're both okay? We may have won more challenges than the other team, but if you both had to sit out the challenge, then we'd be the ones outnumbered."
"Zoey does have a point," Cameron said, "despite the win-loss ratio currently being in our favor, getting injured could jeopardize- oof!" He walked right into the back of Mike, who had stopped walking.
Noticing what had happened, Mike glanced down at his friend. "Oops! Sorry, buddy, but it looks like we're here."
The camera zoomed out to show Chris and Chef in a speedboat. Well, Chef was in the driver's seat while Chris stood on the boat's nose.
"About time too," Chris complained, annoyance on his face. "Seriously, you guys walk slower than my mom sending a text."
Still holding his handheld console, Sam happened to look up and noticed an absence of long, blonde hair and green eyes. "Uh, where's Dakota? Is she around today?"
Chris shook his head at the gamer. "Dakota won't be helping out with today's challenge." Pointing over his shoulder, he explained, "she's back at the production camp doing chores."
A flash cut to the production camp had Dakota walking into the area with a platter full of steaming hot coffee cups.
"Um, hey? I have everyone's coffee orders," Dakota awkwardly called out. Several interns, including the short, chubby one with glasses, the skinny girl with braces, and a new red-haired intern, all walked by Dakota while wordlessly taking their requested coffee drinks and going on with their work. Dakota noticed how quickly they came and went without saying a word, and huffed while putting a hand on her hip. "Wow, rude! Not even a thank you?" As soon as the words left her mouth, she blinked as if she had an epiphany. "Oh, now I understand how the help feels. I have some apologies to make when I get back home."
(Confessional- Dakota)
"So far I've had to fill Chris's toilet with spring water by bottle, take the other interns' coffee orders because I'm the newest, and handle creepy things like tarantulas," Dakota listed, still dressed in her intern uniform. "If I had gotten camera time for this, it'd probably be fine, but who would watch an intern fill Chris's toilet and hand out coffee orders? Exactly. Nobody!"
Now holding a megaphone in hand, Chris began to explain the challenge.
"Today, we will be laughing as you risk your lives in the Smash, Splash, 1-2-3 X Dash!" The camera zoomed out to show two platforms floating out on the lake, each one of the team colors. The Confused Bears had the red platform closest to the camera that seemed to travel to the right, and the Floating Salmon had the green platform behind it that traveled to the left. "Players have to cross the beams, grab a dueling stick from the edge of the dock, bring it back to your team, and place it on your board." The team icons were shown rolling across the platforms' narrow sections to the other ends, where dueling sticks in their team colors laid in a pile. Back on the wider part of the platform where the teams were supposed to gather were a set of hooks for the teams to place the sticks on. "Two dueling sticks make an X. Three X's win the challenge!"
"That's it?" Scott asked, a conspiring smirk forming on his face. "Then it should be easy to-."
Leaning over, Chris popped Scott's thought before he could complete it. "Anyone who messes with the other team's sticks will result in them losing the challenge."
Faking a cough to cover up what he was going to say, Scott instead remarked, "At least there's no shock collars this time. That should make this easier for all of us."
Satisfied with Scott's canceled plans, Chris continued, "Only one member per team may cross at a time. If you land in the drink, that turn gets you no points. So use that dueling stick to swat, trip, or bat your opponent into the water. This will be awesome to see."
"What is your fascination with seeing us hurt each other?" Zoey inquired. "You were never like this in the first three seasons."
Chris shrugged at her question. "The show got bigger as time went on. More pain means more viewers."
Cameron raised his hand. "Is there a particular order we're supposed to go in?"
"You decide your own order," Chris answered, pointing a finger at Cameron. "But each team member must go at least once."
"And since our team is so small, some of us will have to go twice," Dawn noted to her teammates.
"No problem for the Lightning," the athletic overachiever bragged, flexing his muscles. "Lightning is used to doubling up and carrying his team to victory."
(Confessional- Lightning)
"Lightning is so used to winning things for his team, he might as well be a team of one. Those Salmon better watch out once Lightning gets his hands on a dueling stick because he's gonna knock them out!" Lightning bragged.
Sam played more of his handheld console until the dark-skinned hand of Chef Hatchet yanked it out of his grip.
"Hey!" Sam complained as the assistant host pocketed his game, and then slouched in dismay. "Aw…"
"You know the rules, Sam. No electronics out in the wild," Chris said as Chef climbed back in the boat and drove Chris past the campers to his own platform where he could watch the challenge under the shade of an umbrella and in the comfort of an Adirondack chair. "Now that I'm at my chilling spot, it's game time! Swim to your docks and wait for my signal to start."
(Confessional- Sam)
"It's a double bummer," Sam groaned sadly. "Dakota's not around to watch me compete for my place to stay, or humiliate myself on national television. Then Chef took my backup console. Ugh, I am going to have killer tech withdrawal tomorrow."
The Confused Bears were the first to reach their platform. Lightning arrived first, followed by Scott and Sam.
"Aw yeah," Lightning boasted as he clung to the platform, "first to swim out!"
"Not exactly." Dawn was heard saying.
The boys looked at the platform, and blinked as Dawn appeared to be standing on the platform completely dry.
"What the? How'd you?" Lightning stammered in disbelief. "You're not even sha-wet!"
Sam groaned. "Lucky. Swimming with all these clothes on is a real drag. Why'd we have to lose our swimsuits in that blimp crash?"
The camera panned over to the Floating Salmon's platform, where they all stood on it soaking wet. Mike's usual hair spike drooped down over his face, Zoey's pigtails and flower clip sagged from dampness, Cameron held up his arms as water dripped down from his hoodie sleeves, Brick removed one of his boots and tapped out the water while Jo wrung her hoodie dry without taking it off.
"I feel all icky," Cameron said, looking at his wet body.
"Spoken like a true baby, string bean," Jo remarked, swiping her hair out of her eyes.
Brick shrugged, putting both boots back on once they were emptied of water. "It's nothing I haven't experienced before. Back at cadet school, our clothes get soaked all the time while we're training. Sometimes even dirty because of the mud."
Squeezing water out of her pigtails, Zoey spoke up, "So does anyone want to go first? Do we have some kind of plan?"
"I can go first," Mike offered, stepping forward. "It'll be like the scene in Total Warriors 3 on the vine bridge with the giant mallets."
On the Confused Bears' platform, they saw who was going to play for the Salmon.
"It looks like they're having Mike go first," Scott noted, looking at his teammates.
"I'll go first if everybody wants me to," Sam said, gesturing to Lightning. "We should save Lightning for someone like Brick or Jo since they look pretty tough."
Before anyone could voice potential objections or other thoughts about Sam's idea, Chris sounded his air horn.
"Go!" The host declared.
"Best of luck, Sam!" Dawn encouraged as Sam jogged down the narrow path to the other side.
"Okay, Mike… you can do this," Mike assured himself softly as he ran from the opposite direction. "Just start this challenge out strong, and everything will be fine." He passed Sam at the halfway point, and reached the other side holding the dueling sticks soon after. He grabbed one of them, and began to make his way back across.
Sam did the same on his side, and both boys raised their dueling sticks while calling out battle cries. Unfortunately, both young men closed their eyes while they did so, and did not realize they passed each other without engaging in combat.
"Seriously?" Chris frowned at the lack of dramatic action, and lifted his megaphone to his mouth. "Start hurting each other, or I'll get bored, and that will be bad news for all of you!"
Sam returned to his team with their first dueling stick, and put it on the scoreboard.
"Sha-sweet! Stick number one!" Lightning cheered, pointing to Scott. "Go get stick number two, dude."
"If you insist," Scott quipped with false pleasantry. The devious guy ran across.
Mike jogged past his teammates with their first dueling stick. "You're up, Zoey!"
"Thanks, Mike! I won't let the team down," Zoey said, running out onto the narrow path.
"Prepare to be eaten, salmon!" Scott jeered as he passed Zoey at the halfway point.
"You'll have to catch us first, bear!" Zoey shot back.
Both players grabbed one of their dueling sticks, and ran back in the direction they came from. Meeting at the halfway point again, and unlike Mike and Sam, they clashed sticks against each other.
"Ugh, do us all a favor and take a dive," Scott sneered as he fought to overpower Zoey.
Scott pulled back and tried to take a swing at Zoey, but she ducked in time to prepare a strike of her own that Scott barely managed to block.
"Sorry, but I'd rather not," Zoey said, grunting from effort.
Chris watched the duel with an amused expression. "A little better, but I'm still bored." Pulling out a walkie-talkie, he said into it, "Release Scuba Bear!"
Scott jumped over a swing from Zoey, and raised an eyebrow. "Scuba who?"
To the surprise of both players, a bear wearing scuba gear jumped out of the water onto the platforms. It let out a roar that frightened Scott and Zoey, and swiped Scott into the lake while he was frozen with terror. Zoey managed to recover her instincts, and ran past the bear with a yelp of fear.
Chris chuckled as Zoey returned to her team with their second dueling stick, the whole team staring at Scuba Bear with wide eyes. Scuba Bear made the 'I'm watching you' motion with its claw, and did the same to the Confused Bears as Scott swam back to his teammates. It put the rebreather to its mouth, and dove back into the lake to wait for its next attack.
"Zoey completes Team Kinosewak's first X," Chris announced as Zoey put the second dueling stick with the first on the scoreboard.
"Alright, string bean. You're next," Jo said, pointing at Cameron.
The bubble boy raised his eyebrows in shock. "Me? But what about the bear? That could eat me as an appetizer."
Jo shrugged. "You aren't wrong, but it looks like they're saving the best player for last so we should do the same. See?" She gestured to the other team, who was sending Dawn out next, convinced she could do something about the bear since she liked animals. "Plus that little animal fairy of theirs is the only other person here your size. You'll be an even match."
"I guess you have a point," Cameron admitted reluctantly.
"Of course I do, now move it!" Jo gave him a hard shove forward. Cameron stumbled a little from the force, but began to jog across on his own.
"Greetings, friend!" Dawn said as she noticed Cameron coming from the other side.
"Hi to you too!" Cameron replied hurriedly, running to his team's pile of dueling sticks. He picked up a dueling stick, but the weight caused him to stumble. "Whoa-whoa-whoa!" Thrown off balance by the stick, Cameron fell off the platform into the water. His dueling stick floated beside where he fell in, and he soon resurfaced, splashing wildly. "H-Help! I can't swim!"
"Hold on, soldier!" Brick dove in without thinking twice.
Dawn had started to run back when she saw Cameron's situation, and gasped softly, "Oh my…"
"Keep moving!" Scott yelled at her. "He fell in so his stick doesn't count anymore."
(Confessional- Scott)
"Hopefully that kid's embarrassment of not knowing how to swim will keep everyone's mind off how I got taken out by a freaking bear," the devious guy said. "Come to think of it, how'd he get out to the platform in the first place?"
(Confessional- Cameron)
"I just saw my life flash before my eyes," Cameron said, his eyes wide with shock. "A lot of it was in my room." Putting a hand to his chin, he thought back. "Huh. It wasn't that eventful until I came out here. Funny."
When the confessional static cleared, Chris was shown at his supervising station.
"So Kinosewak gets no points," the host stated, "and Dawn ties up the score again for Team Maskwak."
Dawn set the second stick on her team's scoreboard, completing their first X.
"Will a team come out ahead? Who will face who in the matches to come?" Chris continued. "See for yourselves after the break right here on Total Drama Pahkitew Island!" The show faded to commercial.
As the show faded back in, Mike and Zoey were watching in concern as Brick swam back to their team's platform with Cameron's arms looped around his neck and the bubble boy himself draped on the cadet's back.
"Cam! Are you okay?" Mike asked, kneeling down as Brick laid Cameron on the floor.
Cameron spat out some water, opening his eyes weakly. "I severely misjudged the weight of that stick."
"And I clearly misjudged the weight of you," Jo quipped snidely, earning hurt looks from the rest of the team. "Hey, I'm calling it like I see it. And since super soggy here just had to rescue you and the other team is sending out Lightning now, I'm going to go next."
(Confessional- Jo)
"It might sound like I'm being harsh on the kid," Jo said, "but it's his own fault for not learning how to swim before he came out here and for not picking up a dumbbell once in his life."
Jo and Lightning ran past each other on the narrow platforms, each going the quickest either team had gone so far.
"You're going down, dude!" Lightning shouted to his opponent, quickly reaching the other side and grabbing a dueling stick.
(Confessional- Lightning)
"This is Lightning's comeback match," the athletic overachiever told the audience. "After Joe shamed Lightning on that slippery wall, he's been looking for a rematch. No dude gets the best of Lightning!"
Lightning raised his dueling stick high as he ran back, letting out a roaring battle cry. Jo saw his attack coming from a mile away, and allowed herself to smirk confidently. Right as they met at the halfway point, Lightning swung his stick, but Jo moved quicker to lower herself into a feet-forward slide. Lightning evidently swung too hard, because he went flying into the lake on his own.
(Confessional- Jo)
"Typical meathead," she shook her head in amusement, "always charging in with the heaviest swing they can throw. Thanks for the easy win, Swing and a Miss."
Lightning surfaced, gasping for air. He noticed a big brown figure next to him, and swam away with a scream when he realized it was Scuba Bear.
With a smug look on her face, Jo put up her team's third dueling stick.
"Jo starts Team Kinosewak's second X!" Chris announced. "Now it's Sam's turn to go against Brick!"
While Dawn helped Lightning out of the water, Sam gulped and began his second run across the platform. On the Salmon's side, Brick seemed to have dried out enough to run across without issue.
(Confessional- Brick)
"Now's my chance to put my team in the lead, or let the other team catch up to us again," Brick noted, "I hope it's the first one. That way I can earn more respect from Jo, I mean, the team. Yeah, definitely earn more respect from the team," he corrected himself at the last second, though he didn't look like he bought his own words as much as the audience would.
Brick collected one of his team's sticks, and began his run back to his team. Halfway there, he crossed paths with Sam.
"Uh," Sam struggled to find something to say as he held up his stick in defense, "stop! I'm the boss of this level, and I'm not going to let you pass."
Brick raised his own stick. "Sorry, soldier. You're the enemy, and I'm not going to let you win this battle, or this war."
Both boys swung their sticks, but Brick's swing was more accurate, sending Sam into the lake with a big splash.
"That's another one for the Salmon Squad," Brick boasted as he returned to his team. Including Cameron, who was back on his feet, his team went into a brief moment of cheering.
"Team Kinosewak makes their second X," Chris updated from his chair, "which means they are now one hundred percent ahead of the competition!"
Treading water, Sam sighed, "and Dakota's still not here to see any of it."
Somewhere in the woods, Dakota was walking through with her hands cupped around her mouth. "Come back, little monkeys! Here, little monkeys! Your challenge isn't until tomorrow!"
(Confessional- Dakota)
"Some genius intern thought it would be a good idea to have the new girl watch the monkeys," Dakota pointed herself out as the new girl, and sighed heavily. "If it weren't for the little deal Chris has with Daddy, I would probably be fired."
Looking around, Dakota pouted. "Where am I? This place looks familiar. I'm pretty sure the spring I got Chris's toilet water from was around here… but what happened to the spring?" Folding her arms over her chest, she continued to look for the monkeys while muttering, "this island is, like so confusing."
"My turn," Mike said to his team, then looked over his shoulder at their opponents. "Looks like I'm going up against Scott. Maybe I need to pack a little extra muscle this round. Sorry if Vito does anything stupid." Willingly pulling off his shirt, his hair slicked back and the absence of his shirt revealed Vito's little necklace.
"Ey, yo," the alternate identity greeted, tossing his shirt to Zoey, who caught it to keep it safe. "What's the deal?"
Walking over to him, Jo explained, "I'll tell you what the deal is, Shirtless Stuart." She pointed to the other team. "The freckled fool over there and you have to duel. Grab a dueling stick from across the way and bring it back here. Feel free to take a swing at the guy, but don't fall into the lake, or we can't receive a point. Clear?"
"As a window. Be right back," Vito said, turning on his heel and doing as Jo instructed.
"Ooh, you took your shirt off? I'm so scared," Scott wittily remarked upon seeing his opponent, rolling his eyes.
"You'll be even more scared when you get a close look at my abs, buddy!" Vito snapped back.
The two boys arrived at their respective platform, and picked up a dueling stick. They began to run back to their teams, but Scuba Bear jumped out of the water for another visit. This time, the bear landed on Vito's side of the platform.
Vito glared at the animal. "Hey! Move, pal! You're blocking my way!"
Scuba Bear responded with a roar, and picked Vito up in its claws.
"I didn't say to move me!" Vito shouted right before the bear threw him into the lake.
With one player taken care of, Scuba Bear turned its attention on Scott, who screamed as he ducked under a paw swipe, and booked it for his team's platform.
(Confessional- Scott)
"This is the first time I've dealt with a bear twice in one day," Scott noted, holding up two fingers before switching it to one. "Let the record show I didn't like it, but I am glad that there weren't sharks waiting for us in the water too."
Scott arrived back at his team's platform, staring wide-eyed over his shoulder with the rest of his team. Scuba Bear somehow snapped two claws together in a 'darn it' motion, and dropped back into the lake to wait for its next attacking opportunity.
"Team Maskwak is catching up," Chris announced as Scott added the third stick to their scoreboard.
Vito swam back to Mike's team, grumbling as he pulled himself up onto the platform. Laying on the floor, he glared up at Jo. "You didn't mention there was a freaking bear out there."
"If I did, would you have even tried to duel?" Jo countered with a raised eyebrow.
"No," Vito shot back, hesitating a moment before correcting himself, "okay, maybe I would have."
Zoey crouched down, handing Vito the blue shirt Mike always wore. "Here's your shirt back. I'm up. Wish me luck!" Rising to her feet, she jogged out to the narrow path.
"Try not to get mauled!" Vito called after her.
"She asked you to wish her luck," Cameron said, looking down at Vito as the alternate identity sat upright.
"Yeah, and telling her not to get mauled is my way of saying that," Vito reasoned, pulling on the shirt. Mike's hair spiked back up into normal position.
Once the shirt was fully on, Vito gasped sharply and Mike returned. "Did I score a point?"
The next match was between Zoey and Dawn. Being two friendly girls, neither young woman was up for trash-talking one another, and so focused on reaching the other platform to retrieve a dueling stick. On their way back, they clashed batons, but didn't put much power behind it.
"So sorry about this, but it's for the challenge," Dawn apologized, pushing her stick against Zoey's.
"Don't worry. No hard feelings," Zoey replied, giving the moonchild a friendly smile.
On the Confused Bears' dock, Scott stood back as Lightning and Sam cheered for their teammate.
"Go, Dawn! Show her your strength!" Sam encouraged.
"Take her down, creepy girl! We need to catch up!" Lightning added, hands curled into tense fists.
Behind them, Scott watched the duel while tapping his chin thoughtfully. An idea coming to mind, he donned a sneaky grin. Putting on a false look of shock, he pointed.
"Dawn, look out! The bear!" he shouted.
Hearing the warning, Dawn lowered her stick as she looked around. "Where?"
Biting her lip regretfully, Zoey took advantage of the opening and shoved Dawn off the platform. "Sorry," the indie chick hollered over her shoulder as she ran to her team.
Lightning and Sam stared at Scott, the former annoyed while the latter was aghast.
"Why'd you go and say that?" Sam asked. "She got distracted."
"I'm sorry, but I really thought I saw the bear coming around for another attack," said Scott, wearing a remorseful grimace. "It's been able to get the jump on us the last two times, so I thought warning her could help her win the duel for the team."
(Confessional- Zoey)
"I really hope Dawn will want to be friends after I knocked her into the lake like that," Zoey said, tapping her index fingers together nervously. "Dawn doesn't seem like the kind of person that would hold that against me, but you never know."
"That's Team Kinosewak's fifth stick," Chris declared from his station, "they only need one more to win it while Team Maskwak needs another three. This could be the final match, people!"
"Not if Lightning has anything to say about it," the athletic overachiever vowed, "he's gonna give his team a sha-comeback!" Sam, Scott, and a soaked Dawn cheered for him as he ran out to the platform.
"Looks like Mister Charge and Swing wants another humiliating defeat," Jo said with some amusement before pointing at Cameron. "Bubble Baby, I'm taking this one."
"No arguments here. You can have him," Cameron replied, watching Lightning on the other side.
Nodding to herself, Jo ran out to collect a dueling stick. The two athletes ran to their respective platforms, grabbed a baton, and started heading back. Lightning seemed to have learned from their previous bout because he wasn't charging and preparing to swing already. They met halfway, and started batting at each other. Blows were deflected, positions were held, and swings were dodged.
"Why don't you just give up?" Jo grunted, holding her ground. "You're hopelessly behind, anyway."
"And miss out on a chance to score against another dude? No way!" Lightning shoved his stick against hers.
Jo blinked at him in confusion. "Um, what?"
Chris yawned into his hand. "Bor-ing! Turn up the action a little!"
Managing to force Lightning into stumbling back a little, Jo pointed a demanding finger at him. "Get your eyes checked, jockstrap. I'm not a dude!"
Rolling his eyes, Lightning moved back in to make another swing. "Please. I can see you're a guy."
"Seriously? If you think that, you're an even bigger idi-!" Jo's retort was cut off by Scuba Bear's return.
The bear jumped onto Jo's side again, and swiped at her with a roar. Yelping, Jo jumped onto Lightning's side in an effort to dodge.
"Hey, get back on your own side!" Lightning snapped at her, attempting to jab at her with his baton.
"There's no rule against it! And in case you haven't noticed, there's a bear on my side!" Jo shot back, blocking it.
Zoey grasped her pigtails in concern. "Jo, get out of there!"
Dawn held her hands to her face. "Oh my…"
Sam stared in awe. "Whoa, this level just got a difficulty spike."
"Don't give up, Jo," Brick encouraged.
Jo and Lightning were both being attacked by Scuba Bear now, and the two campers alternated defending themselves against the bear then against each other.
"Dude, you're cornered," Lightning said, keeping his attention on Scuba Bear, but briefly flicking his sight over to Jo while he spoke. "Face it. You're not winning this one."
Frowning in annoyance, Jo stared at her stick, and tightened her grip. "I… am not… a dude!" She spun the stick, briefly confusing Lightning, and managed to bop him off the platform with the end of her baton. As he splashed into the water, she planted one end of the baton on the dock, and used it as a stand while she kicked Scuba Bear in the gut. The bear did not anticipate the move, and was knocked back into the lake. Planting both feet back on the platform, Jo hefted up the baton and carried it over to her team.
"I believe," she put on a smug grin as she put the stick with the others, "that's game point."
"Team Kinosewak wins!" Chris declared, to the cheers of the Floating Salmon. The Confused Bears groaned at the idea of losing for a fourth time, including Lightning who was treading water.
A flash forward showed Dawn, Sam, and Scott all sitting on their team's treehouse balcony, eating the food that the moonchild and the gamer had managed to forage that morning. Down below, Lightning was working out next to their fire pit.
"Look," Scott said quietly to the teammates he was sitting with, causing them to glance up at him. "I know we all had a pretty bad day, and we all screwed up somehow, but I think we need to cut Lightning. He's the only one of us who lost all of their duels, and he's not exactly the sharpest piece of wood on this island if you catch my drift."
"I dunno," Sam spoke up, swallowing a bite of a pear. "He's the strongest guy around. We need him for the more physical challenges."
"Dawn, what say you?" Scott asked the last girl on the team.
Dawn pursed her lips. "Forgive me for being skeptical, but I don't exactly trust your word. Your aura appears very troubling to me."
"Is this about distracting you during your match with Zoey? I said I was sorry," he defensively replied, tossing berries into his mouth. "I really thought it was there."
"Or you could have been acting under false intentions," Dawn argued, rising to her feet. "Excuse me, I need to meditate before the ceremony. I need to make my choice." She walked into the girls' side of the treehouse, leaving the two boys to look at each other and share looks of confusion.
(Confessional- Dawn)
"Meditating hasn't given me the clear answer I was looking for," the pale girl said, sitting in a meditative position. "It has given me three different perspectives. Scott's is the most haziest for reasons I can't understand, Sam's would be the easiest to deal with as it would make the least waves, and Lightning has unresolved issues with his father that won't be fulfilled even if he wins." Raising a finger, she continued, "I'm not a selfish person, and each vote I make, I make with the thought of how it'll benefit me and my fellow players. I just hope I make the correct decision."
When the static cut, the show faded into the elimination ceremony that night. The remaining four members of Team Maskwak sat spread out on the stump seats at the bonfire. Lightning sat in the seat closest to Chris, Scott sat in the front row as well but a space away from Lightning, Dawn sat in the back row behind the empty seat between the two boys, and Sam sat off to the far corner away from the host. Chris stood by his oil drum podium, and Team Kinosewak were next to him.
"To the victors go the spoils," Chris began to say before taking out a fast food bag with the depiction of a rotten apple on it, "courtesy of Spoiley's Secondhand Food Emporium, where one man's trash is another man's tapeworm. Think fast!" He tossed the bag to Jo, who caught it with ease. Turning his attention to the losing team, he picked up his plate of marshmallows from the podium. "Now, one of you has gots to go. Dawn, Sam, you're both safe."
Though the two named campers were unhappy with eliminating yet another of their teammates, they both smiled a little upon receiving their immunity symbol.
"Scott, you messed up today in one of your duels and one of your teammates' by crying bear," Chris said, and Scott had the decency to look ashamed. "Lightning, you lost both of the duels you participated in. Not a good track record, bro." Lightning scowled at being reminded of his failures. "The last marshmallow goes to…"
Scott glanced at Lightning, who glared at him. Not liking the look on the athlete's face, he chose to glower back.
"…Scott!"
Lightning broke off the frowning match when he heard his name not be called. "What? No way!" Jumping to his feet, he pointed at himself. "Without Lightning, this team will have no sha-muscle!"
Sam awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. "Sorry, man."
Dawn stood from her seat, and said, "I apologize too, Lightning, but I am led to believe this will provide you with a better outcome than winning would've given you."
"Yeah, right! What could losing possibly have for Lightning that winning don't?" Lightning scoffed.
"For one thing, you wouldn't keep embarrassing yourself getting your butt kicked by a girl," Scott suggested with a smirk.
"What girl? Who're you talking about?" Lightning blinked in confusion.
"Me!" Jo shouted, reminding the Confused Bears that their opponents were still there. She shoved the fast food bag in Brick's hands, and waved her arms above her head. "He's talking about me, jockstrap!"
"Wait…" Lightning squinted at her for a moment before his eyes went wide. "You're a girl?!"
A flash transition cut forward a few minutes to a stunned Lightning loaded into the Cannon of Shame with a helmet on his head. Unlike the helmets people wore when being shot out of a cannon, Lightning's looked more like a football helmet, most likely to reference his status as a football jock.
"Man, this reeks," Lightning complained, "Lightning never finishes any place but first!"
Chris shrugged cheekily. "Look at it this way. At least it's not last."
"That does not make me feel better," Lightning retorted in annoyance right before the cannon shot him into the night sky with a scream.
Chris made a show of holding his hand above his eyes as if he was trying to see as far as he could. "He's going long! Want to find out who will come up short? Tune in next time on Total Drama Pahkitew Island!"
(cue end credits)
Lightning- 9th
B- 10th
Anne Maria- 11th
Dakota- 12th
Staci- 13th
Lightning is one of my least favorite characters to come from the second generation. Like Max, I will admit he's hilarious to watch, but he overstayed his welcome in the competition. To this day, it still baffles me he never came up on Scott's radar after eliminating threats like B and Dawn. With him being so athletic, he seemed like someone Scott would want to get eliminated before the late merge. Him making Zoey's worst fear of being eliminated by a jock happen, and being such a petty butthole about Cameron winning the final four immunity when HE was the one to break their deal first, doesn't help matters.
Onto the challenge. Since the original title, Blast from the Past, was in reference to Amy's return, I had to come up with something different. I decided since making an X is how the challenge is won, the new title was pretty straight forward. As evidenced in the episode, I arranged duels in pairs where I thought the strength level would be pretty equal so no match appeared too one-sided. This is where I decided Lightning's run in the competition would finish. Using the rule of three, he faced Jo a total of three times (the first being the greasy wall in the second episode, and now two duels), and failed all of them. With him being an athlete, I thought it would be fitting to apply the 'three strikes and you're out' rule. Shawn's canon subplot of ditching the challenge to hide from the zombies was changed to more of Dakota experiencing life as an intern to give her a little camera time for her interning subplot.
The pre-challenge scenes were for building the chemistry between two of the remaining couples. I enjoyed the canon scene of Brick and Jo colliding on their runs and deciding to one-up each other, and decided to use it here too. As for Mike and Zoey, we've previously had scenes focusing on Mike's disorder and who Mike is outside of that, so I figured it was time to give Zoey her focus and show her uncommon interests she mentioned in her audition video and online bio, explaining why she was an outcast in her hometown.
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