Finally, it is officially completed! The long awaited chapter nine! I swear, this is quite possible the most difficult chapter... scratch that, most difficult anything I've ever had to write, but hopefully, upcoming chapters won't take anywhere near as long for me to complete. Sorry if it's underwhelming, but I wanted this chapter finished and uploaded before everyone started to think I'd discontinued it altogether. And I apologize a bajillion times for that ludicrously long hiatus, writer's block is a b!tch. Alright, I bet you all want to jump right in, so I'll save my ramblings for the end (rhyme unintended). Please enjoy!
Night had since fallen as Jasper and Steven sat at the shore, idly watching the inky black waves splashing upon the sand, the half Moon creating milky ripples on the water's surface in the distance. Steven had kicked his sandals off and sat with his legs stretched out in front of him, allowing the water to splash upon his bare toes. The water felt cold at first, but over time, he became used to the temperature and it began to feel comfortably tepid. Jasper had her knees bent, her arms wrapped around her legs and pulling them against her chest. When Steven glanced up at her, he couldn't help but notice the eerily distant look in her yellow eye as she stared out at the ocean. Her breathing was slow and calm.
Steven couldn't tell if she, too, was hypnotized by the ocean's calming trance, or if she was remembering her time trapped at the ocean's floor within a toxic Fusion. He shivered as he remembered Malachite's face stretching and distorting as her component Gems struggled to pull her apart, just before she was pulled into the ocean and didn't resurface for months.
As if on cue, Jasper closed her eye and sighed softly, catching Steven's attention. He opened his mouth to say something, but didn't get the chance to when Jasper spoke up first.
"I… still remember it as if it were yesterday." she began, her voice low and solemn. "Blue Diamond feared for her safety, so she had Pink Diamond remain on Homeworld for most of the War's duration. That is, until a couple of weeks prior to the War's end. So many of our best soldiers had been bubbled away by the Crystal Gems' forces, and by that point, we couldn't afford to lose anymore Gems. Even the mass-produced Quartzes from Beta weren't enough. So, despite Blue's warnings, Pink Diamond travelled to Earth herself to put this War to an end once and for all.
"It was just me and three of her best Ruby guards accompanying her. At the time, she believed it would be enough. The original plan was to confront Rose Quartz personally and remedy the issue, amiably if possible, pugnaciously if not." Steven screwed up his face in confusion at the unfamiliar words, but made no move to question her. "If it came down to it, she would evacuate Homeworld's forces from the Earth and the Diamonds would set off the Corruption Song. She had hoped it wouldn't come down to that, but it was an option on the table from the very beginning.
"Just before we arrived on Earth, a Tourmaline messenger was sent to the Crystal Gems' base to inform Rose of Pink Diamond's arrival, that she wanted to meet with her in a peaceful setting and talk things out with her. After that, all we had to do was wait. When we first landed, Rose Quartz had yet to arrive, so Pink decided to pass the time by exploring the local area. I accompanied her in order to keep her protected, while her Rubies guarded her Palanquin. That was… actually the first time I'd ever heard Pink Diamond admit her true feelings about the Earth."
Steven looked up at her in awe as her gem glowed with an amber colour, flickering and glitching momentarily before it cast a tall hologram in front of them, standing just in the water but not bothering the waves. Stars entered Steven's eyes as he looked at the figure towering over him; despite the fact that she was a translucent gold projection, Steven recognized her almost instantly. Her thick, fluffy hair, her elegant but simple ensemble, her thin regal figure.
"Pink Diamond…" Steven whispered to himself. His whole body felt a little bit colder when the hologram opened her mouth, speaking in Jasper's low, raspy voice, a distinct contrast from the feminine, motherly voice he remembered Pink Diamond having. However, what she said was all the same.
"I have always loved the unique beauty of this planet… it's a shame we cannot have both." Pink Diamond said, a hint of solemnity in her tone. She glanced sadly at the sandy ground beneath her, then a small smile appeared on her lips as she chuckled softly. "Heh, what would my sisters think of me? Saying something like that? This is organic life, after all." She paused again, her smile disappearing. "And Homeworld needs their colony much more than they need short-lived lifeforms like these. Wouldn't you agree? Jasper?"
Jasper's gaze fell, trying to hide the downcast expression on her face. "Ye… Y-Yes, my Diamond." she echoed softly.
Pink smiled slightly at Jasper's response, then looked up, seemingly at nothing in particular. She started forward a couple of steps, much closer to the two of them than Steven felt comfortable with, then reached out her hand, palm facing the two of them. Steven remembered her touching that strange tree he saw in his dreams, but in holographic form, it looked a bit awkward. Jasper hesitated for a second, then reached up a trembling red hand, her clawed fingers outstretched as she attempted to push her own palm against the hologram's.
"M–My Diamond…"
The projection glitched at her contact, then fizzled out entirely, vanishing in a cloud of white sparkles; the glow from Jasper's gem disappeared in tandem. With that, Jasper's fingers curled into a fist and she slowly recoiled her arm, letting out a solemn sigh as she continued to stare at where the hologram used to be. Steven noticed the moonlight glinting off a tear forming in her eye, but she squeezed it shut with a soft, disgusted grunt.
Steven forced a small smile at her and tried to rest his hand on her arm, but she used her opposite hand to bat him away, snarling softly as she glared down at him.
"Don't touch me, runt." she warned, her voice low and dangerous.
"Sorry." Steven meekly apologized, looking away from her. "But, Jasper, it's okay. I know it hurts, but… it's okay to think about it. You need to think about it, or it'll just hurt more."
Jasper scoffed in response. "How can thinking about it ever make me feel better? Thinking about it won't bring her back. T-Talking about it won't make what happened any less… tragic!"
"I know it doesn't make sense, Jasper, but sometimes, Earth logic is backwards like that, y'know? And besides, that's what worked for me and Connie a while back, so…"
"What's a Connie?" Jasper interrupted, looking at Steven with a genuinely confused look on her face.
Steven's eyes widened at that question, momentarily thinking back to when Peridot made that same mistake and, more recently, how Aquamarine had referred to the "human specimens". He didn't want to go through this argument all over again, but he corrected her statement nevertheless with a bit a more irritation in his tone than he intended, "Not a Connie, just Connie. She's my friend, you've seen her before."
"Oh, the human." Jasper scoffed.
Steven looked up at her uneasily as she looked away, then sighed and decided to face the ocean again as well. "Yeeaaahh… anyway, a while back, me and Connie were having trouble fusing because I was upset about some of the things I'd done before, and she was too. But, after we learned that thinking about it was okay, then that made everything better. Well… not better, it still hurts a little to think about what happened to Bismuth and Eyeball and…" Steven trailed off for a moment, not noticing the weird look Jasper gave him at the mention of 'Eyeball'. He thought over his words before he continued, "…yeah, it still hurts to think about it, but… it doesn't hurt as badly anymore."
Jasper sighed, putting one of her arms behind her and propping herself up on it as Steven continued, "I think it'll help you too. You've kept that memory, your feelings, everything about what happened to Pink Diamond locked away inside you for such a long time, no wonder it's bothering you so much now." He waited a few seconds for Jasper to respond. She never did. "Jasper… when was the last time you talked about what happened to Pink Diamond?"
It took a few seconds for Jasper to finally acknowledge his question, and she did with an almost manic chuckle, tilting her head back just in time to see a shooting star streak across the night sky. "Over… five thousand years ago." Steven's eyes widened in shock, while Jasper said it as casually as ever, as if it were completely normal. "It was… right after Pink was shattered. I tried to speak to Rose Quartz, I tried to get answers out of her, but… I failed. Other than reporting the outcome of our mission to Yellow Diamond, I haven't spoken of it ever since."
Steven glanced at the gem on his stomach, lifting a hand and resting his palm against its faceted face. "What do you mean… you didn't get any answers out of Rose Quartz? What did she do? What did she say?!"Steven found himself becoming increasingly worked up and was beginning to gradually raise his voice, so he quickly stopped himself, closing his eyes and taking a few deep breaths.
"She didn't say anything. She didn't really do anything either." Jasper began, her voice eerily calm. "After the battle between us and Rose, it was only me, Ruby 4ND, and Pink Diamond herself left standing. By the time it was all over, I was alone. That Ruby was so injured that I'm surprised she lasted as long as she did. It wasn't until after Pink was shattered that she finally stopped fighting it and retreated into her gem. It was just me and Rose Quartz there, but I may as well have been alone.
"Once I recovered from the shock, I demanded answers from her. I demanded to know why she shattered her, why she gave up everything she had! Why she gave up… our friendship. I threatened to break her gem if she didn't tell me what I wanted to know, but… she didn't say anything. She stared at me for a few seconds, then she turned and walked away without a word. She didn't apologize or anything, she just… left me there, alone, with only Pink's shards and three Ruby gems to keep me company." Steven stifled a whimper at her words, digging his fingers into the sand beneath him.
"I don't know how long I stayed there on Earth, all I know is Ruby 8NB regenerated while I was there, but I didn't want anything to do with her. That was when we returned to Homeworld so that I could present the shards to the Diamonds, but that was the last I saw of her shards and the last I heard about her. Yellow Diamond seldom ever spoke of Pink after that and didn't like hearing about her either. I… guess that was just her way of mourning the loss. Forgetting she ever existed."
Jasper closed her eyes and breathed deeply while Steven squeezed his eyes shut, trying to come to terms with what he heard. "So… that's why you haven't talked about her since then? Because you thought it would be better to… forget it ever happened?" A couple of seconds passed and Steven looked up at her in concern, watching as Jasper stared at her clawed hand, flexing her fingers in and out.
"I tried to forget about her; a part of me knew it was wrong, but… it was either that or break altogether. Then, all of those memories and all of those feelings I thought I'd never feel again came back when I was sent back to Earth, when I thought I was facing Rose Quartz herself all over again. I hoped that I was, so that I could finally finish her off after all these years! But instead, I got her spawn in her place, bearing her gemstone, but not her memories, or her physical form or… anything."
Steven looked down ashamedly at his gem, or… Rose's gem. He wasn't quite sure whose gem it really was. Either way, he felt a bit nauseous as he looked at it.
"I… I'm sorry, Jasper." The Quartz glanced down at him, a skeptical look in her eye as he continued. "I'm sorry that you can't get revenge for Pink Diamond because of… because of me. But this was mom's choice, not mine! I never asked to take the blame for the shattering of Pink Diamond, I never asked to be blamed by the others for their leader not being around anymore!" Tears began to spill down Steven's cheeks as he continued, hardly thinking his words over before he said them, "I—I never asked to be born! I never asked for any of this!"
He subconsciously dug his fingers into the cloth bandaging covering his chest, much like he would have with his shirt, curling up as much as he could as tears seeped from beneath his closed eyes. Jasper glanced down at him for a second, but quickly looked away. She didn't want to admit it, but she felt a slight twinge of concern and sympathy in her chest when she looked at how upset the boy was. She hardly recognized that feeling, nor did she particularly like it.
She clenched her hands into fists, trying not to let Steven get to her. A few moments passed until she finally decided to change the subject, asking something she'd been wondering about for a while now. If anything, it'd get her mind off of this.
"Why do you keep calling Rose Quartz that?"
Steven sniffled a couple of times and wiped his eyes, looking up questioningly at Jasper. "Wha… What do you mean?"
"I mean, you keep calling her 'mom' instead of Rose Quartz." Jasper clarified, a tinge of irritation in her tone.
"Oh. Well, that's because she is my mom… or was. She's… the one who brought me into this world, she's the one that was supposed to take care of me and protect me, and… love me. But she can't, because she's gone now, and I'm here in her place." Steven glanced sadly at the waves splashing upon the sandy shore, but even the calming roar of the seawater wasn't enough to calm him right now. He wiped away tears he felt forming in his eyes.
"Oh." Jasper sighed, half to herself. Steven couldn't help but notice how dejected and gloomy she sounded.
He lifted his hand and tried, once again, to rest it on her shoulder. This time, she made no move to pull away from his touch.
"Jasper, are you okay?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
Jasper sighed. "Yeah, it's just…" She looked up at the half Moon, stars millions of light-years away sparkling around it in the dark night sky. "…my mom's gone too."
After that declaration, Steven was left speechless. A part of him wanted to say something, anything to console her, but another part of him was more content with staying silent for fear of saying the wrong thing. Jasper was silent as well, staring blankly out into the sea. Steven couldn't help but wonder if she even remembered he was there. He wasn't sure how long they sat there, but he decided it was time to go inside when he began to nod off. It took a bit of convincing before Jasper reluctantly gave in, using Steven as her unlikely crutch as they returned to the Crystal Temple.
As they walked, Steven happened to notice something peculiar about Jasper that he'd overlooked before. Her uniform looked relatively identical to its form prior to her regeneration, all except for one thing. The Yellow Diamond insignia adorning her chest wasn't yellow at all anymore. It was Pink.
"Looks like you that you took my suggestion to heart." Steven joked with a cheeky smile at the Quartz. Once again, his attempt at comedy fell flat on Jasper and she simply glared at him, but said nothing.
On their way up the steps to the beach house, Steven noticed that Pearl was standing at the window just before she slinked away at his gaze. He "hmm"ed curiously to himself, then looked down at the steps as they passed by beneath his feet. He understood why she had been watching them: she was worried about him. Who wouldn't be? Not only had he just returned from the Gem Homeworld, but he was out there alone with Jasper as well. Regardless, he felt a touch betrayed, again beginning to feel like the Gems didn't trust him as much as they could.
When they stepped into the house, he noticed Garnet and Pearl standing near the couch, conversing softly before the door opened. Jasper slumped wearily against the wall and closed her eye with a soft moan, like she wanted to pretend she was anywhere but here. Steven decided not to say anything about how he felt about Pearl watching them out on the beach. Not yet, anyway.
"Oh. Steven, um… Jasper, you're back." Pearl said, her tone suggesting she was speaking through gritted teeth or biting back the urge to panic.
"Well, we never really left." Steven corrected her with a smile. "So, um… Jasper can stay here tonight, right?"
Pearl opened her mouth to respond, but Garnet cut her off, "Of course, Steven. As long as she doesn't cause any trouble, she can stay here for as long as she needs to." Pearl sighed softly, a hint of irritation in the sound, but only Steven seemed to notice. He looked at her for a second, concerned, then looked up at Jasper. Her eye snapped open abruptly, as if she hadn't even been aware of the other Gems' presence until now. With a grunt, she forced herself into an upright position, a hard look in her eye. Steven tensed, but forced a wide grin at her instead, hoping to get her focused on something that wasn't her resentment at the two Crystal Gems.
"Oh, cool! That sounds alright, doesn't it, Jasper?" Jasper didn't respond, and it took a second for him to realize that she was shooting her hard, bitter glare, not at both Gems, but only at Garnet, who simply stood there, unfazed. Steven's smile disappeared and he tried his best to distract her from the Fusion's presence. "Jasper?" The Gem in question growled softly, and Steven didn't need future-vision to know what she was about to do. "Uh… J-Jasper?" He reached towards her, but it was already too late.
With a furious roar, Jasper pushed herself from the wall and dove at Garnet, ignoring Steven as he fearfully cried out her name. Pearl had her spear summoned in an instant and Steven's gem glowed as he prepared to summon his shield, but before Jasper's clenched fist could land on its target, Garnet had her gauntlets summoned and held them protectively between them. With a metallic thud, Jasper's clenched red hand smashed into the two golden stars on the back of the weapons.
"Ah! Wha…? But—But how?!" Jasper cried out, recoiling a step and standing with her feet apart to keep herself balanced; she swayed dangerously regardless.
Garnet smirked slightly and slid a forefinger across her visor. "Future vision." was all she said. That only seemed to anger Jasper even further.
"Agh… I'll tear you apart!" Clenching her fists again, Jasper threw several punches straight at Garnet's face at just about every angle she could think of. Every last one was effortlessly blocked. At this point, Pearl had dissipated her spear and watched the one-sided fight in silence, while Steven still held his shield at the ready, just in case.
Garnet's smug smirk had since vanished and she said, in her usual deadpan tone of voice, "Not gonna happen."
Jasper let out a noise that sounded like a cross between a growl and roar. "You can't block forever, Fusion!" She lunged straight towards Garnet, arms outstretched and her clawed fingers open, attempting to latch onto the Fusion and pull her apart. Garnet grabbed onto Jasper's hands at the last possible second, interlocking her own fingers with the Quartz's and squeezing her hands, not allowing her to pull free from her grasp.
"Except I can, and I will if I have to."
With a forceful push against her, Garnet threw Jasper backwards. She staggered for a few seconds before she managed to catch herself on the wall just behind her. Steven jumped back with a startled yelp when she nearly crashed right into him. Jasper hung her head, breathing heavily, raking her claws across the wall and tearing four jagged marks into its surface. Steven noticed how uncomfortable Pearl looked, before she stepped over to Garnet and said something, too quietly for Steven to make out, but that was the least of his worries right now. Instead, he stepped over to Jasper and rested a hand on her shoulder, causing her to snap her head up to look at him, startled by his touch.
Steven was a bit unsettled himself by the unexpectedly cold look she gave him, but he didn't let her silent threat faze him. He didn't know why, but a part of him knew that she wasn't going to hurt him.
"Jasper, please, this has to stop." he softly pleaded with her. Jasper glared at him for several seconds more, then her gaze softened slightly as she looked at the floor.
"No… no, I—I won't let them beat me." she snarled quietly, half to herself. With an enraged cry, she ripped an entire chunk of wood out of the wall as she pushed off of it to face Garnet and Pearl again, where they held their ground. "Unh… agh… I will not… be beaten… by another, ugh… Fusion!"" She let out an enraged battle cry as she rolled into her spin-dash attack, barrelling uncontrollably towards the two Gems. Fear stabbed into Steven's heart as he watched.
"Garnet, Pearl, watch out!" was all he could say.
However, they hardly needed to. Garnet stepped forward and pushed one of her gauntlets against the fiery ball, holding her back before striking her hard with the opposite weapon and forcing Jasper to unfurl from her attack prematurely. She staggered backwards and would've fallen if she hadn't quickly caught herself on the wall yet again. And, with that, she was right where she was only a few seconds ago, except this time, one of her legs collapsed beneath her weight and she fell to the floor with a defeated grunt.
"Jasper!" Steven cried out, dissipating his shield and rushing to her side. She looked up at him and opened her mouth to say something, but hung her head again, deciding against it. "Jasper, please, you can't keep fighting them like this! Even if you could hold your own against them before, you're still weakened by your Corruption and you can't even summon your weapon! You're just going to get hurt!"
"Who cares if I get hurt!?" Jasper shouted at him. "I'll just come back anyway! And I'll keep coming back until that Fusion's gems are dust!"
Steven flinched at her words and he looked up at the other two Gems. Garnet clenched her fists, but said nothing, and Pearl looked deeply uncomfortable. He looked back down at Jasper who simply glared at the floor, not wanting to face any of them right now. "Jasper, come on, let's talk about this."
"There's nothing to talk about!" she snapped. "I have nothing to say to your Pearl orthat Fusion! They're traitors, they mean nothing to me!"
"But we can change that!" Steven said hopefully. "I thought you changed your mind about Fusion!"
"I did… until I realized that it was a poison. Fusion does nothing but break you down from the inside out… it strips you of everything you once were! I mean… just look at these two!" Jasper lifted a shaking arm and gestured in Garnet's direction. "A loyal soldier and a respectable diplomat turned into… into a couple of rebels that have forgotten who they are. They're starved for each other… starved for Fusion! It's sick!"
"Fusion is not a poison, Jasper." Garnet chimed in. Steven was surprised at how calm she sounded. "Fusion can be a wonderful experience for all Gems involved… as long as that Fusion is stable."
Jasper scoffed at her. "We have nothing to say to each other!"
"That's why you're so upset." Garnet continued regardless. "You know that Ruby and Sapphire formed the perfect Fusion on their first try, but all of the Fusions you have involved yourself in were toxic and unstable. Malachite, Tiger's Eye, and, a few eons ago, Rhodochrosite." Both Steven and Jasper's eyes widened at the last name she listed off. Steven bit back the urge to question the unfamiliar Fusion's identity. It could wait until later.
"H-How do you know about…?" Jasper trailed off with a disgusted grunt. "You know nothing about me! You act like you do, but you don't! And you never will!"
"I know more than you may think, Jasper, but you won't admit it to yourself. You're afraid to admit it." Jasper seethed as she glared up at the Fusion, but Garnet took a few daring steps in her direction despite the fact, dissipating her weapons as she went. "We don't want to fight you, Jasper. You're scared, you're hurt, you've been through a lot over the centuries." Jasper began to shake beneath her. "We just want to help you, that's what the Crystal Gems are here for."
Jasper growled. "I'll destroy you!" She lunged at Garnet with a battle cry, but she managed to dodge the Quartz's attack by moving back a couple of steps, causing Jasper's claws to rake through nothing but the empty air. For a couple of seconds, everyone waited in tense silence for Jasper to make another move, but she never did. She crouched there, snarling under her breath and raking her claws against the floor.
Steven took a daring step towards Jasper, but he stopped abruptly when Pearl bravely strode up beside Garnet, spear summoned and held at the ready.
"You can't win, Jasper." Pearl told her bitterly. "Whether you're the 'perfect Quartz' or not, you're outnumbered, and you're not on Homeworld anymore. You don't have access to your high-tech weapons or any back-up. Face it, Jasper, you have lost, and so will the rest of Homeworld when the time comes."
Jasper stared up at her with a wide, manic eye, breathing heavily, but she didn't say anything. With a growl, she tried to pull herself forward and latch onto Pearl's scrawny form, but Pearl had her spear pointed precariously at Jasper's gem before she could get too close. Steven knew she was bluffing to scare Jasper away, but the sight of Pearl threatening to shatter another Gem made Steven tense up and feel more than a little anxious.
"Not another move." she challenged the Quartz.
Jasper froze, her golden pupil snapping from the sharp spear tip hovering just over her gemstone to the Pearl behind its hilt. Then, she narrowed her eye at Pearl and her gaze suddenly hardened. Pearl seemed to flinch for a split second, but she quickly regained her composure and she retained her hard, serious glare at the Quartz that crouched beneath her. A couple of seconds passed as they stared each other down, then Jasper's frown curled into a thin, devious smirk.
"Those are some big words coming from a Pearl." she began, half to herself. "And what'll happen if I do try to make another move? What are you going to do about it? Shatter me, perhaps?"
Pearl's grip on the spear tightened. "Don't… don't give me any ideas."
"Then, go ahead, Pearl. Do it, shatter me!" Jasper said, her voice eerily calm. "If you have the audacity to threaten me, then surely you're brave enough to go through with it."
"Wh-What?"
"I think you heard me." Jasper snarled. "Do it, Pearl. I've got all night!"
Steven was tense and held his breath as he watched them and he wondered why Garnet wasn't making any move to stop her. That is, until Pearl shakily retorted, "I—I… no! I won't do it!" Her spear abruptly disappeared, and Steven finally relaxed, allowing himself to breathe again. "The Crystal Gems have never shattered their enemies, and we aren't going to start today!"
Jasper stared up at her, wide-eyed, for several long seconds, then she looked away, chuckling softly. "Heh-heh… should've known. You're just as much of a coward as you look. Just another Pearl trying to make herself look big and strong in front of the higher-ups." She grinned mischievously up at Pearl, revelling in her anxiety and increasing rage. "Unless, of course, you'd like to prove me wrong."
Pearl growled quietly at her opponent. "I could beat you just as easily as any other Gem!"
"Hm… then go on, Pearl. I've got all the time in the world!" Jasper retorted, her tone becoming increasingly frustrated.
With a cry of exasperation, Pearl's gem glowed and her spear was re-summoned in an instant. "Agh… I am not going to stand for this any longer!"
She pointed her spear in Jasper's direction. Steven opened his mouth and took a step towards both of them to intervene, but before anyone could make a move, a booming voice cut all of them off.
"THAT IS ENOUGH!"
Pearl let out a startled yelp and even Jasper flinched; both of them looked up at where Garnet stood, staring them down through her visor. Despite being unable to see her eyes, Pearl shrunk away from her furious gaze. Jasper looked stunned by the sudden outburst from the normally quiet, calm Fusion, and only Steven seemed to be relatively unfazed, if startled.
"Garnet?" he spoke up softly. A couple of seconds passed before she finally spoke again, sounding calmer now, but a hint of frustration remained in her tone.
"We are not here to fight each other!" Garnet stated, then she lowered her voice to a much softer, calmer tone as she said to Pearl, "This isn't what Steven wants for us. We promised him that we would give Jasper a chance."
Pearl snarled as she glared down at Jasper. "But she's just… so… ugh, insufferableand inconsiderate!"
Jasper opened her mouth to retort, but was cut off when Garnet spoke once more, retaining her stoic tone as if nothing had ever happened, "Perhaps we should give each other some space. Steven needs his sleep, so we can resolve this in the morning." She turned and started towards the Temple Gate without another word, only stopping when Pearl spoke up once more.
"Wait, we're just going to leave him out here alone? With Jasper?!"
"He's been alone with her before and she hasn't hurt him. Even before, when he and Connie were alone with her, they effectively held their own against her. Steven is will be just fine."
"Are you sure?" Pearl started after Garnet and she continued walking away. "M-Maybe one of us should stand guard… just in case?"
Garnet activated the Gate with her gems, then turned to look at Pearl. "If anything, that will only make matters worse. Jasper is still very uncomfortable and anxious around the rest of us. Steven is the only one she really trusts so far, that's how I know Jasper won't try to hurt him. She may be volatile and bitter, but she is more likely to direct any physical attacks to the architecture," They both glanced at the torn walls and floor around Jasper. "or one of us instead of him."
"But… I… h-how can you be so sure?" Pearl asked softly.
"When haven't I been?" Garnet said, running two fingers across the surface of her visor as she looked down at Pearl.
They stared at each other for a couple of seconds, then the red Fusion disappeared into her respective room. Pearl stared after her, watching the cerise Y-shaped design on the Gate's face fade into nothing, She stared at its empty grey surface for a long time before reactivating with the white glow of her own gem, a cyan design scrawling across it and opening once more. Just before Pearl stepped through the Gate, she looked towards Steven and Jasper, a sad, worried look in her eyes. He was standing beside Jasper, attempting to console her, to no avail. The Quartz herself was facing the floor, hardly moving and saying nothing.
She opened her mouth and stepped towards them, going to say something, but then she remembered what Steven had said to her before. He felt like she didn't trust him, he felt like she wasn't allowing him to grow up, and he felt like she didn't even care about him. Those facts hurt her all the way to her core; it felt like Rose herself was doubting Pearl's trust and loyalty to her, and the thought alone was enough to crush her from the inside out. With a quiet, shaky sigh, Pearl turned on her heels and stepped through the open Temple Gate, allowing it to close behind her.
Steven looked up momentarily, surprised that she'd actually left, then looked back down at Jasper. She continued to stare at the floor, saying nothing, doing nothing. She was still as a statue, not even moving in rhythm with her breaths. For someone who didn't know any better, she would've looked unconscious or even dead at first glance.
"Jasper?" he whispered to her. The sound of her name prompted her to slowly look up to face him, her face mostly hidden by her blonde bangs, only the dark green spike protruding from her right eye pushed through her hair and made itself visible. Steven tried not to make it too obvious that he was disturbed by the sight.
"Um… if you want, you can sleep on the couch for tonight. Or… don't, since… Gems don't need to sleep and all that." Steven suggested, forcing a smile at her. Jasper had little reaction to his statement, she only looked away with a bitter sigh. "Well, if you don't want to sleep, then… maybe you can watch TV or—or play video games in my room."
Jasper glanced up, giving him a skeptical glare. "I have no idea what you're talking about, runt."
"What do you mean? Don't you have TV on Homeworld? Or—Or even video games!?"
"If they do, then I never had any time for it."
"Ugh, no wonder the Gems left that place." Steven whispered to himself for a second, then he remembered when Peridot was still adapting to the Earth. He remembered the several strange, foreign names she had for things that were everyday objects to him and the other Gems. "Oh! Maybe it's not called that on the Gem Homeworld! Well, c'mon, I'll show you, and then maybe you'll recognize it!" He headed towards the steps up to his loft. He had one foot on the second step before he realized that Jasper wasn't following.
"Oh. Jasper, are you com…?"
She hung her head again with a grunt. "No."
Steven tilted his head in confusion, then walked back over to her. "Jasper, what's wrong?"
She looked up to face him, looking him dead in the eye. "You just don't get it, do you?" she asked coldly. Her gaze made Steven shiver and shrink away from her.
"Get what? C'mon, Jasper, you've gotta… you've gotta tell me these things!"
Jasper sighed in exasperation. "She was right. That… that confused, defective Pearlof yours."
"Right about what?"
"I… have lost. I lost five thousand years ago." Jasper deadpanned. "She mocked me with the threat of shattering. She knew that was what I wanted, what I've wanted for millennia! If I was in shards, then… at least I'd befree, but she couldn't even spare me that mercy! All because of that lie Rose Quartz told them all those years ago!" She dug her claws into the wooden floor a ripped up another chunk of it with a furious cry, making Steven recoil a step.
"But shattering isn't the answer, Jasper! It never is!"
"Why shouldn't it be?! All I do is suffer every second of every day! I'm so tired of it all!"
"But shattering isn't the answer!" Steven reiterated. "I know you're hurting and I know that you're scared and upset, but getting shattered won't make it any better! I've seen those gem shards, Jasper, all they do is crawl around, searching for the lost pieces of themselves after they regenerate. They're so broken and lost, that's all they really know how to do anymore!"
Jasper snarled. "Like it'd be any different from what I'm doing now."
"But… if you were shattered, then you'd never be able to get revenge for Pink Diamond, and you'd never get to know the truth." Steven pointed out.
"Oh, now you're just mocking me." Jasper scoffed. "Rose Quartz is gone… Pink Diamond… is gone. There's nothing I can do about it anymore."
"Come on, Jasper, there's gotta be… there's gotta be something!" Steven stepped towards her and took one of her huge hands in two of his smaller ones, surprising the Quartz. She tried to pull away a time or two, but he only held onto her tighter, limiting her movement. "You—You may think that your life doesn't have any purpose anymore, now that Pink Diamond is gone and now that you're Corrupted and you can never back to Homeworld again. But, trust me, it does! All you have to do is take the time to realize that!"
"Realize what?! That I'm a failure?! That I wasn't even good enough to save my own Diamond!?"
"No! You may not have been able to save Pink Diamond, but it doesn't mean you're at fault! You never could've seen it coming, Jasper, nobody did! Remember, those three Rubies weren't able to save her either, they were just as helpless as you were at the time." Steven fell silent, looking at Jasper as she stared at him, wide-eyed yet again. It took a moment for her to relax again and she looked away, snarling under her breath.
"But if I had been quick enough… if—if I had just been strong enough, I could've done something! Anything!" Jasper hissed. Steven quickly released her hand when she clenched both of them into tight fists. "But I wasn't… I just stood there and watched it happen like some lowly Pearl! And now, she's gone because I wasn't good enough. She's gone and I'll never get her back…" She clenched her fists so hard that the tips of her clawed fingers dug into and penetrated her palms.
Steven stared down at Jasper as she crouched there, head hung again. As nice as it was to have Jasper not attacking him at every given moment, a part of him wished that the "old Jasper" was back. He wasn't used to seeing her so mentally shattered like this, and it scared him almost. She needed to talk to him or someone about all of this; she'd kept it in for such a long time now that it was beginning to tear apart her mental state from the inside out. Steven was only relieved that she hadn't recorrupted in the midst of all this emotional turmoil, but that realization only made him wonder how long it would be until she did.
He hardly knew what to do or what to say. He'd never faced a real loss in his life; his own mother was gone, but he had to admit to himself that he didn't know how to feel about her. He'd never even met her, only heard about what'd she done in the past. Other than that, Steven didn't really know loss, and he hoped that he'd never have to. However, there was one Gem that did, and dealt with that feeling for over a decade now. Steven knew how dismissive Jasper was of Pearl, but he had to give it a chance. In the end, maybe they'd both be better off because of it.
"Hey, Jasper?" The only response he got was a soft, raspy grunt. Jasper didn't say anything else, so Steven continued. "Um… I was thinking and… maybe you can talk to… Pearl about this." Jasper looked up and opened her mouth, but Steven quickly cut her off. "Look, I know you don't like her and I know you don't want to talk to her, but she knows about the way you feel better than all the rest of us! She misses Rose Quartz as much as you miss Pink Diamond, and maybe you can talk to each other about the way you feel! It could benefit both of you!"
Jasper replied without missing a beat, "I am not going to waste my time with that Pearl, so you can forget it." She paused for a second, then said something Steven wasn't quite expecting. "You're the only one here that isn't a defective embarrassment. You're the only one who's worth even a second of my time! You healed me, you brought me back from that torturous, animalistic form… if only you weren't so weak, then maybe you'd prove to be a useful accomplice. But instead, you're just a tiny, soft… thing."
Steven winced, but he wasn't quite sure how to take that. One moment she was praising him, the next she was insulting him? How did that work? He put it to the side for now and decided to focus on the task at hand. As to be expected, Jasper refused to speak to Pearl, and he had a feeling Pearl wouldn't be too fond of the idea either. He knew Garnet and probably Amethyst were both out of the question, but if she didn't settle her differences with the Crystal Gems, then what would be the point of her staying here? There had to be something.
Perhaps he had to start off from a different direction. Instead of making peace with the Crystal Gems, maybe Jasper would have to make peace with herself first. How he would do that was a mystery, however; she blamed herself for Pink Diamond's shattering and, no matter what he tried to say, she wouldn't believe him. Then, he remembered what Garnet had been talking about before and what Jasper had said in response. She hated Garnet because she represented everything Jasper tried, but failed to be in the past: someone that was strong, untouchable, unbreakable. In Jasper's eyes, that meant being a Fusion, but all Fusion ever earned her was a lot of emotional and physical turmoil.
Steven thought about the mention of another Fusion that Jasper had apparently been a part of, Rhodochrosite. If Garnet's words were to be believed, which they usually were, Rhodochrosite was one of, if not, Jasper's very first experience with a Fusion, but she too was a toxic, unstable mess. Simply a prelude to the likes of Malachite and the Tiger's Eye Fusion that left Jasper in the state she was in now.
"So, Jasper," Steven began, a bit hesitantly. He rocked back and forth on his feet, putting on an innocent, naïve façade that Jasper clearly wasn't believing. "who is… or, who wasRhodochrosite?"
Jasper perked up at the mention of the name, looking half surprised, and half an emotion Steven couldn't quite read. "You…? Ugh… it doesn't matter. She's nothing but another mistake."
Steven somewhat brightened expression quickly fell and his entire posture seemed to droop at those words. Once more, Jasper evaded his question. At this point, it was becoming a little irritating. He made that fact unintentionally obvious with his words, "C'mon, Jasper, how am I supposed to help you if you won't tell me anything?!"
"You don't have to help me, you know." Jasper deadpanned.
Steven grunted irritably. "I know I don't have to, but I want to! You're lost and you're scared and you're suffering, and I can't bring myself to just let you stay that way!"
"Whether it's what you want or not, it won't change anything! I'm suffering… because it's what I deserve! Shattering is what I deserve… for letting her die!" Jasper's voice suddenly lowered to a whisper, and Steven barely caught her words. "But I'm too much of a coward… too weak to accept the consequences for what I've done. I'm just so—so…" She got out the first syllable before she broke off with a shaky sigh.
Steven's frustration finally gave way to sympathy as he looked down at her, lifting a clawed hand and fiercely rubbing at her single eye. Steven knew exactly what she was going to say, but she couldn't bring herself to admit it. Not to him, not to herself, not to anyone. So he decided to say it for her.
"Jasper… it's okay to be scared." he said simply, forcing a sad smile down at her. "Whether you're a big, bad Quartz soldier or not, it's okay to be afraid every once in a while, anyone would be in a situation like this. I mean… how do you think Pink Diamond felt in her last moments? She probably felt the same way you do right now: scared and… helpless."
Jasper snarled softly. "Quartzes don't show fear. It—It's weakness!"
"It's not weakness, it's… a feeling, and that's normal. Everyone gets upset or scared or something every now and again, not just you. But they try to hide it and pretend they don't feel anything to try and make themselves feel better, but, in the end, it doesn't. It only makes everything worse." Jasper looked up at him, a skeptical look in her yellow eye and Steven took a step away. "Jasper, is… that what Yellow Diamond told you? That feelings are weakness?" He thought of the song she had sung to Blue in the midst of her mourning.
"It's what I've known ever since the day I emerged."
"Because that's what the Diamonds wanted you to believe!"
"But what else am I supposed to go by?!" Jasper asked, raising her voice again. "All I've known is the Diamonds! Ever since I emerged from the Earth's crust, all I've known is what the Diamonds want me to believe, what purpose they had created for my kind! Pink Diamond was the only one who strayed from what the Authority believed… she was the only one who allowed her Gems any—any freedom! But Yellow called her wrong, defective because of that. Just because she was smaller and didn't think they way they did…"
Steven's eyes widened at those words, and he suddenly smiled down at her; Jasper's face screwed up in confusion at his expression. She opened her mouth to question him, but what Steven had to say was short and simple.
"Remind you of anyone?" His smirk grew a little when Jasper seemed to jerk as if she had received a quick jolt of electricity. Her breathing became audible again, and it quickened. Steven's smirk disappeared when she began to tremble, her gaze snapping around like she had forgotten where she was. "Um… Jasper? Are you okay?" He took a step towards her, but he recoiled again when she abruptly let out a bark of laughter, a sound Steven at first mistook for a growl or a roar.
"They're nothing like Pink Diamond." Jasper hissed, not even looking up to meet Steven's gaze. "They'll never be Pink Diamond!"
"An-And I'm not saying they are!" Steven clarified, putting up both hands as a sign of surrender. "You said that Pink Diamond was different, that she believed all of her Gems were unique. Like those Beta Gems that're guarding the Human Zoo now! There's another Jasper who's really skinny, almost like Pearl, and there's a Carnelian that looks a lot like Amethyst, she's… undercooked, I guess. But Pink still kept them around! They weren't defective, not to her!"
Steven waited for a response, but never got one. Jasper opened her mouth a couple of times, but both times, she simply closed it again. He decided to try something else.
"Uh… I remember you saying something about those Quartzes before, Jasper. You were asking about them, you said that Yellow Diamond shattered them… or she said she shattered them, but she didn't. But don't you remember them still? Didn't you serve with them on the battlefield once?"
A moment of silence passed, then Jasper began snickering softly to herself. "Of course I remember them. They were… they were…"
Steven hesitated after she fell silent again. Finally, he was getting somewhere, but a part of him already knew what she was going to say. He asked, nevertheless, "They were… what?"
Jasper clenched her hands, lowering her head and not looking at him anymore. "They were… ugh. Those Gems, they were like… like sisters to me." Okay, maybe he didn't know what she was going to say. "They were defective, but… it's hard not to feel something for the Gems you emerged with. They were wrong… but when you were grown in the same Kindergarten, formed from the same material, then you see a bit yourself in all of the other Gems like you."
Steven took a moment to situate himself on the floor in front of her. "Do you… ever… miss them?"
"…Sometimes. We're all that's left of Pink Diamond's army, we were meant to represent her, keep her legacy alive. I try to tell myself that they're defective and that they'd be better off shattered… but it doesn't work. For a long time, I thought they were shattered, and trying to make myself believe that it was what they deserved, it… it only made me feel worse."
"But you know they're not now! They're okay! You're okay, everything's fine!"
"It's not fine!" Jasper roared, leaning forward and getting almost nose-to-nose, or nose-to-gem with Steven. He tensed, but tried to hold his ground. "They are millions of light-years away! Our Diamond is still gone, I…" She relaxed her position a bit and her voice suddenly fell again, sounding much more devastated and quiet. "…they probably don't even think about me anymore. They probably forgot about me a long time ago."
"What do you mean?"
Jasper rose her voice again, as if scolding a disobedient animal. "I was always the 'big, bad, perfect Quartz soldier' to them! In their eyes, I was never like them! Not that I would want to be… ugh, they never understood the way I felt about them, they never really knew. I… never told them the way I felt. It's not like anyone really cares about the way you feel, not on Homeworld."
"They probably would have, though." Steven said, looking at the floor a bit sheepishly. "They were all really nice and outgoing, I'm sure they would've understood if you had just let them know! Instead, they probably thought you didn't care for them. You were the big, bad, perfect Quartz soldier from Beta, while they were the small, weak Gems that could never add up to the likes of you. They never paid you any mind because… they thought you didn't have time for them. They thought they were just useless defects in your eyes."
Jasper blinked rapidly a few times, then situated herself against the wall, hissing as she covered her face with one hand. "I remember… after Pink was shattered, I returned to Homeworld with her Ruby soldiers and her Palanquin to inform Yellow Diamond of the tragic occurrence. I remember seeing the… lesser Betas there, waiting for Pink's troops outside the Diamond Spire." Steven thought of that towering white thing he saw in the distance on Homeworld. "They thought I was returning to report our victory on the Earth and the rest of Pink's court remained on the colony. They followed me up to the throne room, they were so excited, so… naïve.
"But, instead of reporting a victory, I reported a tragic failure to the Diamond Authority. Yellow Diamond reacted accordingly, I was punished because of our defeat… I guess that was just her way of letting off steam. Those Betas, they weren't supposed to be there, they never should've been there. But they were, and they all could've lost their lives because of it."
A tall, bulky Quartz soldier stood before where the towering figure of Yellow Diamond. Jasper's own form was swathed in a pink ensemble, a rose-coloured insignia adorning the centre of her chest. She lifted and crossed her muscular arms in front of her, forming the Diamond salute in front of the insignia, her eyes closed and bowing her head slightly. When she spoke her voice was low and unstable as she struggled to keep her tone steady.
"Mookaite Jasper Facet… F-Facet-1A9L Cut-3XN, reporting."
Yellow said, with a dismissive wave of her hand, "Let's not make this take any longer than it needs to. Was your mission on Earth a success, Jasper?"
Jasper dropped the salute and put her arms firmly at her sides, looking up at the Diamond with a stoic expression on her face. Well, as stoic as she could manage at the time. She hesitated for a second, then closed her eyes again, sucking in a deep breath through clenched teeth. "I—I can't say that it is… my Diamond."
Yellow raised an eyebrow at the inferior Gem. "Oh?" Her gaze hardened significantly, making the Quartz flinch beneath her. "And why is that?"
Jasper suppressed a nervous whimper and glanced behind her, where six Beta Quartzes stood in a straight line in front of the tall double-doors leading out of the throneroom. "I… I—I…" She took a moment to steady her voice, then continued, "The… amiable confrontation with the Crystal Gems' leader proved unsuccessful, my Diamond. We had to use force against Rose Quartz, she managed to poof all but one of Pink Diamond's Ruby soldiers and impaired the third. But, Pink Diamond, she… she…" Jasper stifled a whimper and tightly clenched both hands into fists. Her breathing quickened.
Yellow, however, wasn't taking her repeated hesitations. "Get on with it, Jasper!" she snapped, her voice stern and powerful.
Jasper grimaced, then closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. She said it quickly, like ripping off a band-aid, "Pink Diamond is… gone. Rose Quartz shattered her."
Six collective gasps sounded from behind Jasper and Yellow's eyes widened, then suddenly narrowed again. Jasper held her breath as the towering, authoritative Gem stepped towards her, leaving barely a foot of space between them. Jasper hastily lifted her arms in the Diamond salute once more, struggling to hide her fear. She heard a few scared whimpers and mumbles come from behind her, but she remained frozen.
"This had better be a joke, Jasper." Yellow said. Her voice was eerily low and calm, which only frightened the Quartzes even more.
"I—I'm afraid not."
Jasper hesitated for a second, then reached around, pulling an amber gem bubble from her blonde hair and shakily lifting it in front of her, presenting it to Yellow Diamond. There was a pause, then Yellow reached down and lifted the bubble to eye level in order to examine it more closely. Within its confines were several small, jagged pink gem shards, a weak pinkish glow radiating off of them. Jasper squeezed her eyes shut as tears formed within them; she couldn't show weakness, not in front of a member of the Diamond Authority.
A long moment of silence hung over the eight Gems, until finally, Yellow tapped the top of the bubble and sent it away, much to Jasper's surprise. However, the peace didn't last long before she reached down once more and, this time, latched on tightly to Jasper's form. Jasper let out a strangled whimper as she was suddenly lifted to eye level with the Diamond, her furious golden gaze burning into the tiny Quartz in her grasp.
"You… you failed her!" Yellow seethed. "How could you let this happen!? She was your Diamond!"
Jasper opened her mouth to speak, but was suddenly squeezed so hard she thought she was going to poof right then and there, but, just when she thought she'd had enough, she was dropped, allowed to free-fall towards the floor. A powerful blow to her chest stopped her descent, sending her flying back and smashing against the far wall, hard enough to form cracks across its surface. Her fellow Quartzes looked on in horror, but all of them were too afraid to make any move to help her. There wasn't anything they could do, this was a Diamond attacking her.
Jasper stared up weakly as Yellow strode towards her, continuing to seethe with rage. Bolts of neon electricity crackled around her massive, clenched fists.
"You should have protected her! You could have prevented this!" Jasper flinched at her seething words, and tensed up hard when she lifted a hand, electrical bolts crackling between all five fingers. Jasper had only seen her wield her electrokinetic powers once before: all it took was a split second of contact to make a Gem, no matter how powerful, retreat into her stone. She'd never expected to be right there in front of the attack herself.
"You should be shattered! Punishment for a failure as grievous as this!" Yellow roared. "You're lucky you're as well-made as you are! You're too perfect to throw away, so I will take you myself. You have to serve somebody." Jasper only stared up at her, too sore to move or make any attempt at fighting back. She felt deep resentment stab into her chest at those words, but said nothing. "You will bear my insignia once you reform, and if you don't, I will continue to destabilize your physical form until you do!"
"N-No…" Jasper barely managed to choke out. Moaning painfully, she lifted a hand and pointed at where the other Quartzes cowered on the other side of the room. "Th… The others…"
"Those embarrassments will be disposed of in your absence, there is no need to worry about that." Yellow said, rather casually. Her tone became cold and hostile again when she turned her attention back to Jasper alone. "For now, take the time to think about what you have done. And, don't forget, your gemspace is the only semblance of peace and freedom you will have from here on out."
With that, Jasper looked on in horror as a neon yellow bolt discharged from Yellow's fingertips, fired straight towards at her chest. She could only scream in indefinable agony as the energy tore apart her entire body with glowing yellow veins, separating her arms and legs from her torso and splitting her chest and stomach into two halves. Only her gemstone was left intact. The last words she heard was Yellow coldly proclaiming, "You deserve to suffer for such a disgusting disposition."
Then Jasper disappeared in an explosion of orange smoke.
"That was the last I'd ever seen of them and I thought they had been executed, that those Betas were just a few more Gems I could add to the list of those I had failed to protect over the centuries, failed to save from their fates. She would've shattered me had I not formed as perfectly as I had, but those Betas… they weren't. I can't imagine would it took to convince her otherwise."
Steven sniffled, glancing away and rubbing one of his eyes. "Blue Diamond wanted to keep them, to preserve Pink's legacy. Yellow would've destroyed the entire Zoo if Blue hadn't intervened."
"Hrm." Jasper looked down at her teal-splotched arm, running the opposite hand down her appendage's length. She could almost see the glowing yellow veins arcing across her physical form, cutting her apart, destroying her. Steven looked up to see her shaking and breathing rapidly, lost in her thoughts. The sight disturbed him and he crawled forward, resting a hand on her shoulder. He softly spoke her name, and in response, got a sharp blow to the chest that sent him flying back. Fortunately, he landed safely upon the couch, but…
"Ah! Wha… J-Jasper?!"
She gasped in almost the same instant, and she stared at him, wide-eyed. She lifted both hands and looked them over, taking in reality once more. She let out an exasperated sigh and buried her face in her hands, muttering something incoherently under her breath. He situated himself into a more comfortable position on the couch and stared at her, concerned. This wasn't the first time he'd seen a Gem zone out like that, especially when recalling a bad memory, but he thought better of bringing up Lapis to her right now.
He lifted a hand and put it against his bandaged chest, pushing against it a little. The bandages had cushioned the blow, likely saving him from a few cracked ribs, but he knew that blow wasn't doing the healing injuries there any favours.
"So, uh… it—it's getting late. I need to go to bed soon or Pearl'll kill me." he said with a smile. "Like I said, you can sleep on the couch… if you want, that is." She peeked at him through her fingers, and Steven's smile disappeared. He got down from the couch and started up the steps, "Maybe not, okay. Just, uh… you can do what you want, just don't try to leave or kill me in my sleep or anything, okay?" Jasper remained silent, still glaring at him eerily. "Okay."
Kicking off his sandals, Steven got into bed and pulled the covers up over his body, but he didn't go to sleep, not yet. He watched Jasper, where she remained on the floor, covering her face and saying nothing, doing nothing. He wasn't sure what she decided to do in the end or if she just sat there all night, he fell asleep before he found out. As abnormally eventful as this night had been, Steven expected his dreams to be plagued with Jasper-induced nightmares, as per usual. But, contrary to his expectations, he didn't dream at all really.
He got what he'd been longing for for a couple of weeks now: a peaceful, dreamless night's rest.
I mentioned this before, but I'll say it again: Jasper looked up to Pink Diamond as a mother figure in my headcanon, hence why she referred to her as such at the end of the first section.
Now, it may seem like Jasper is warming up to Steven a bit too quickly, but allow me to explain the logic I'm going by here. Even though she's too stubborn to admit it, Jasper partially feels like she owes Steven for (mostly) healing her Corruption and he's the first one she's met to ever treat her with genuine kindness, he's the first one since Pink Diamond to actually care about her feelings and listen to what she has to say. She respects and admires that about him, but she refuses to admit it aloud.
Steven can see right through her, however, hence the way he occasionally snickers at her, knowing that she cares about him and feels thankful for what he did for her, but will never admit it. That's why he continues to give her the benefit of the doubt, despite nearly shattering Pearl and attacking Garnet at first glance; she has potential to be a good, civilized Gem, he just needs to encourage her to be one. And Steven is still trying to cope with what he's learning about his mother; you know what they say, it's gonna get worse before it gets better.
Alright, two more things before I go. You may have noticed that Jasper's memory (the one about Pink's shattering, depicted in chapter one) doesn't line up with what we know in canon as of the Wanted arc. That's the point. Just a little clue, what Jasper is reciting and what Steven remembers from his dream is not accurate to the actual incident, but that's all I'm going to say. Don't worry, I have that aaaalllll planned out before the Crewniverse smashes my headcanons into a fine paste. That's all you get to know for now. The second thing is brief. The two Rubies that Jasper mentioned in this chapter, 4ND and 8NB, are Eyeball, from the canon show, and the non-canon Ruby with the same gem placement as Lapis, seen in Steven's dream sequence way back in chapter one.
Enough said. Stay tuned for chapter ten! It won't take as long this time, I promise!