C.J. walked towards her office. Her entire body ached from the heals she had decided to wear this morning, but being as tall as Simon had made it worth it. Although she had felt rather silly standing next to the president and Toby after this morning's Senior Staff. Her height had been the bane of her existence since she first towered over other children in kindergarten, but she could use it as well. Men got unruly when women towered over them. She needed all the weapons in her arsenal after yesterday's fuck-up. After she had stumbled in embarrassment into her apartment, she'd rushed into her bedroom, resting her head on the bedroom door, muttering "Idiot! Idiot!" as she banged her head on the cold surface.
What had she been thinking?! She'd tried to kiss him! What was wrong with her? He'd messed with her head, with his constant 'yes ma'am, no ma'am' and his constant… presentness. He was always there, invading her consciousness by being handsome and tall… Oh, so tall. And she'd tried to kiss him. She had banged her head again on the cold door, harder this time, only to be startled by the light knock on her door.
"Are you ok, ma'am?" Her in-house agent had asked.
"Yeah…" She'd said croakily, "just fantastic."
C.J. sighed at the memory. She had managed to not speak with him the entire day, and hopefully, she would be able to avoid him entirely. As she approached the familiar corridor that led to her office, she saw the very familiar tall figure lurking inside her office. Oh, God. I cannot deal with him now, not when I only want to take these damned shoes off and massage my feet. She turned on the spot and walked towards Toby's office.
"Hey," she said as she stood in the doorway.
"What do you want," Toby barked.
"Well, nice to see you too," she said with a raised eyebrow as she entered his office.
"We literally just saw each other," Toby said, enunciating every word clearly.
"What can I say, I missed your shiny head," C.J. quipped.
"C.J!" He warned.
"What?"
"I want to finish this," he said, gesturing the notepad in his hands, "then I want to leave. Preferably before midnight."
"I'm not stopping you," C.J. said as she sat down on his couch, taking off her shoes. Toby observed her as she began kneading her toes and sighed, knowing he wouldn't
get much done with her in his office.
"Why do you wear those?" Toby asked her after a long pause.
"My legs look great in them," C.J. teased.
"Your legs always look great," Toby replied, taking his time to look at her long legs. C.J. tried to suppress her smile. This was a game of chicken, and she was not about to turn away first.
"Well, in these they look better," she said.
"They actually don't," Toby said simply, looking her in the eyes now. "You only think they do."
"Is that so?" C.J. replied, staring at him.
"I know you like to wear these," he pointed to the pair of shoes on the floor, "whenever you want to impress," Toby continued.
He knew her too well, she thought, trying to keep an unreadable face. Toby dropped the notebook onto the table and stood up with a groan. He sauntered to the other side of his desk and sat on the edge, looking at C.J. as she massaged her foot.
"No, impress isn't the right word," Toby corrected himself. "These are your V.P. shoes," he said with a smirk.
"They are not!" C.J. exclaimed. Great, game over.
"These are the shoes you wear when you want to tower over the already tall," Toby sighed dramatically. "And never mind us mere mortals down here on the ground." C.J. couldn't keep it together longer and burst out laughing.
"Ouch," Toby said with his hand covering his heart.
"You never seem to mind," C.J. said as her laughter died out.
"You could wear stilts around me C.J., and I wouldn't care," Toby said.
C.J. smiled. He really could always make her feel better.
"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked quietly.
"No," she said softly.
"Do you want to stay on my couch?" he asked.
"Yeah."
"Well, tough luck, he said, pulling her up.
"Toby!" she yelled.
"I need to work," he said as he pushed her out of his office. He picked up her discarded
shoes and pushed them roughly into C.J. arms.
"Go deal with your tall problem," he said with a small grimace.
"Come on, Toby," C.J. said exasperatedly.
"Am I wrong?" he asked daringly. They stared at each other, and C.J. refused to look
away.
"Uhm…" came Bonnie's voice from behind C.J. "Toby?" she asked nervously.
"It's not about that," C.J. said through gritted teeth. Toby scoffed.
"I just like these shoes," she said and turned around and strutted away, holding her
shoes, leaving Toby shaking his head and Bonnie looking utterly confused.
C.J. was deep in thought when she walked into her office. Toby had completely seen through her, and she hated it. She threw the uncomfortable shoes on her sofa as she neared her desk.
"Hi there," said a familiar voice from behind her. She gasped and walked into her desk, stubbing her toe harshly.
"Why did you do that?!" she exclaimed.
"Do what?" Simon asked, innocently.
"Stand there, lurking in the darkness," C.J. said annoyed.
"Are you ready to go home?" he asked her, completely ignoring her comment.
She stood and watched her desk, entirely at a loss for what she had been planning to do.
"Yes," she finally said. "I won't get anything more done today."
She turned around to look for her bag, and as she turned back to Simon, he held out her coat for her.
"Thank you," she said softly, as he helped her put it on, gently brushing his fingers on the base of her neck as he straightened the collar of her coat.
"Your welcome," he said with a fiery look that made her pleased she wasn't still wearing those damned shoes.
"Shall we get going?" he asked.
"Yeah, let's go," she sighed, bending down to pick up her shoes. She didn't bother putting them on but held them in one hand as she walked behind Simon.
She sat in the car, and her thoughts swiveled inside her head. They were going to New York tomorrow, and as nothing seemed to be happening in the investigation of her stalker, he was most likely going as well. The thought burned her. Today she had managed to keep busy and ignore him as best she could, but in New York, he would be a constant presence, like an orbiting moon. She didn't trust herself around him. He made her head cloudy. She guessed that was his job, but somehow he seemed to be more present than the other agents. When she left the press room, she could feel him behind her, like he radiated strength and security, just like before in her office, and she hated it, and she loved it. She didn't want to be taken care of, but she felt like she didn't have a choice. She turned to her side and watched out the car window as they
sped towards her home.
Later that night
Simon stood and observed his bedroom. The bed was neatly made, military style, and the room was free of clutter. Very few photos and personal items. He was still an army guy although he was no longer in service. In fact, it had been quite a while since he served. He wondered if it was finally time to settle in, truly for the long haul. He wondered if being around her had this effect on him. He smirked at the mirror as he thought about the night before, certainly not for the first time that day. She'd tried to kiss him... His heart beat a little faster at the thought of it. He'd kindly turned her down, but if they'd been truly alone, not with agents in front of them and following by car, he would have grabbed her and kissed her until she was breathless. Today she had avoided him, but he could still smell her perfume from their close proximity as he held her coat for her. Somehow she smelled excactly like he'd imagined; like rain in the spring and freshly sprung flowers. How he longed to hold her close and breath in her scent. He wondered if it was just her perfume or a mixture with her shampoo or some other decadent scent women adorned their bodies with. He looked around his neat but impersonal room and imagined her belongings mixed with his scarce ones. The thought made him smile.
The next day
Carol sat at her desk, typing. She'd arrived early, or even earlier than usual, much to Katie's chagrin. Today was New York and Carol needed to prepare C.J. schedule. She liked to be hyper-prepared, and she knew that C.J. had come to rely on it. In order for C.J. to be most effective at her job, she needed everything filed and organized to a particular system. The two of them had developed a shorthand that made it almost unnecessary to speak. Carol knew precisely what C.J. needed and tried to know before she did. The senior assistance's all had their own method to this madness. Bonnie and Ginger delegated assignments between the two of them and ran a tight ship with the interns and assistance's; Donna seemed to do about half of the work and got none of the praise — but that's what you did when you were utterly and absolutely in love with your boss. And then it was her. Carol and C.J. probably had the closest assistant-senior staffer relationship, excluding the unhealthy bond between Josh and Donna. She was in no way judging Donna, maybe she was judging Josh a little, but their relationship was in no way healthy for either of them. Josh had a girlfriend, but that only seemed to egg Donna on, or at least it in no way seemed to make her back off a little. But Carol's and C.J.'s closeness was based in mutual respect and a great affection for each other, and ok maybe a little attraction from Carol's side - but completely harmless. In fact, it was hard to be around C.J. and not be drawn towards her. Carol couldn't really explain it, but something about C.J. was captivating. She was beautiful and had a great body (good God those legs), but that wasn't what drew you in. Something pure and real was deeply rooted in her core, and it was so enticing that you just wanted to know more, to get more from her. But because of that, Carol had to protect her. She was the guardian of her haven, and she needed to keep people away, lest they drink her up. Carol had hypothesized that that's why she shortened her name to C.J. because otherwise, people would use up her name. It was one of her self-preservation mechanisms. She also dressed more masculine than was natural to her; broad shoulders and straight legs, which then became a stark contradiction whenever she dressed up for a formal event. Carol noticed the look some gave C.J. when she walked down the bullpen in a flowing gown that seemed to be painted on her — she wouldn't quite say the looks were leering but almost. She noticed, for example, hunger in Toby's eyes but she also knew that C.J. liked it. Carol tried to schedule her days so that C.J. had a moment to breathe every day. But she did this without C.J.'s knowledge, because if she knew she would work through her breaks. These were tiny moments, where she delayed a phone call or needed to copy something again.
No one got past Carols' defenses. Well, except Danny. His quiet calmness and boyish charm melted away Carol's protectiveness. Now, no one came past her defenses. Not even the tall secret service agent, although she could tell he wanted to. He had succumbed to C.J.'s draw as most did. Although he seemed to be fighting it, she noticed him watching C.J.'s office as he appeared to be debating with himself in silence. He always knew where C.J. was and seemed never to grow tired of simply standing guard. Perhaps they were the same? Two people who longed to protect her at whatever cost. Carol suspected that C.J. wouldn't mind him protecting her.
Carol walked into C.J.'s office and put files on her desk and arranged memos in a neat order by her computer screen. As she carefully pulled a file from the middle to the top, her hand accidentally brushed against the mouse. At once the bright light of the desktop beamed at her, showing an open application on the new computer screen, that had been brought in after the old one was taking as evidence. That's peculiar, Carol thought. C.J. always turns off her computer. She had even returned from her car one time, just to turn off her computer. This bothered Carol. She couldn't really put her finger on it why this bothered her so much, but the thought was pushed from her mind as she heard the phone ringing. Quickly she turned off the screen and walked to her desk to answer.
tbc.