Nadine and Ralph Fangmeyer were at the head of the procession of cops making their way to motorpool after morning brief. They began checking out their cruiser before heading out on patrol. "Say what you want Naddy, it was a good zinger."
The tigress paused to give her step-brother a flat stare. "It wasn't a zinger 'Rolph'. You know how much Hopps loathes parking duty. Just because it's April Fools Day..."
The large wolf pointedly ignored his step-sister as he examined the wheel-wells. "And as a result, Leo Johnson gets partnered with Nick? You can't tell me that isn't a joke on the Chief's part. Who knew he had it in him."
Nadine just shook her head as she settled into the driver's seat and began testing the various electronics. "Needs of the Force, Little-Bro. Besides, Leo needs to learn a little respect, and having a Fox whose ten years his senior..." Whatever else she was going to say was drowned out when she tested the sirens.
"Move, Bitch! Get out the way!
Get out the way, Bitch, get out the way!"
Ralph all but smashed his paw on the center console shutting the sirens off. The step-siblings had their ears pinned to their heads as they panted for a moment. Glancing around, they saw nearly the entire first shift staring at them. A huge yellow paw snuck in Ralph's window and flicked the siren switch.
"Oh no, a fight's out!
I'm gonna punch yo..."
Nadine swatted the offending appendage away from the controls, turning the siren off in the process. Officer Johnson chuckled and looked to his temporary partner as they headed to their own assigned vehicle. "I'd definitely move if I heard that coming down the road. Good one, little buddy."
Nick snorted without looking up. "This right here? This is why we won't see another fox on the streets all day today." He started on the undercarriage and wheel inspections while Leo checked the top of the car. "Foxes get blamed for shit all the time, especially when it comes to anything considered, 'sneaky', like pranks." He hopped through the open passenger window as Leo settled into the driver's seat. "Hell, when I was a kit, mom would call me in sick for school any time April First was a weekday. I'd have called in SOTS today, but all my medical leave was chewed up after that 'Moose-&-Squirrel' nonsense."
Leo just chuckled. "Yeah, sure it is." He flicked on the sirens.
"Hey hey, Mister Fox, can you be my lover boy?
"Hey hey, Mister Fox, will you be my Foxy toy?"
"RRREEEEEEEEEEE!"
"AAAHHHH!"
Once again the entire motor pool was fixated on one patrol car as Officer Leo Johnson, former ZU Thunder's Tight End and decorated SWAT Officer, scrambled out the driver's side window of his car while clutching at the tattered remains of his right shirt sleeve.
Frank Wolfard and Daniel Snarlov headed over to the panicking lion. "You okay there Leo?" Frank swiftly and efficiently checked over his fellow SWAT Officer's arm for injuries.
"I don't know! That song started and Wilde just spun up to like 150 Mew-le-Hurtz! Am I missing any digits?" Johnson's breathing was starting to level out as he stared at his arm.
Daniel got on the cruiser's running board and looked inside. Nick was clinging to the center console by his claws, his uniform inflated by his puffed out fur. When he noticed the wolf's curious gaze, he began gekkering angrily with bared fangs. Snarlov slowly backed away from the car so as not to alarm the agitated fox. "Well Nick's right freaked out. Wonder what it is about that song?"
Frank patted Leo's arm. "You're fine buddy, why don't you head back to the locker room and get a fresh shirt?" Once the lion was making his way back to the main building, the two wolves headed to their own cruiser. "'Foxy Boy' was a Carrot-Pop song from the late 90's. One hit wonder by 'The Weaver'."
"I thought 'The Weaver' was an inter-species porn studio over on Pack Street." Daniel absently remarked to his partner as they started looking their own vehicle over.
Frank settled into the driver's seat. "Oh it is; they tried branching out, but I think all it really did was recruit new 'Talent' for their studio."
Both Wolfard and Snarlov looked at the center console in mild concern. Daniel glanced at his partner. "Oh stop being a sissy and push the button, Frank." Officer Wolfard snorted at the jab and hit the siren button.
"Who let the Dogs out?
"Who, who, who, who?
Daniel groaned in frustration. "I should have kno...Knock it off, Moon-Moon!"
"What, I like this song!" Frank Wolfard happily bounced in his seat as he sang along with the tune blaring out of the cruiser's sirens. Daniel had just shut the siren off when a new song filled the motor pool from McHorn And Francine's vehicle.
"Don't stand so,
"Don't stand so,
"Don't stand so close to me!"
"Grahhh." The entire cruiser shook as Frank McHorn threw his head back in frustration.
Francine looked at her partner in concern. "Frank?"
He lolled his head to the side to look at her. "It's, 'The Police'."
Various officers were now standing outside their vehicles, hesitant to be the next victim of the music based Precinct-wide prank when a tiny form in a high visibility vest strutted through the midst of them. All conversation ceased as Judy performed her check of the infamous 'Three-wheel-Joke-Mobile' without any seeming concern to the scrutiny she was getting. She popped her Meter-Maid vest taut before she calmly sat in the driver's seat, then turned her head to face the rest of the squad with her paw poised over the control console.
Officer Anderson's jaw was almost hanging open. "No, way." Judy raised her eyebrows, causing a pair of sunglasses which had rested on top of her head to settle onto her muzzle, and hit the switch.
"A, S, S, H, O, L. E!
Everybody!
"A, S, S, H, O, L, E!
"Woof, woofwoof woof, woofwoof woof, woofwoof woof!"
Everybody gaped as the tiny traffic control vehicle made its languid way towards the exit.
"I'm an asshole, and proud of itEE-OO-EE-OO-EE-OO"
The entire shift startled as the normal siren began when the cart paused near the roll-up door. A tiny paw stuck out the side of the cart and wiggled a black Thumb-Drive for all to see before heading out. There was a mad scramble as the assembled shift located and removed the offending media devices from the Mobile Data Terminals in their vehicles.
"Frank? Get over here!" Officer Wolfard looked towards Leo Johnson who was in a new shirt standing outside his cruiser. "I think Nick just ate the USB."