Saturday 14 May, 1994:

"And here are the Gryffindors! Potter, Bell, Johnson, Spinnet, Weasley, Weasley and Wood. Widely acknowledged as the best side Hogwarts has seen in a good few years–"

At Lee Jordan's comment, there was an outburst of boos in the Slytherin section of the Quidditch stands.

Lena glanced at Maggie, who was sitting next to her. Her eyes were fixed on the Gryffindor Keeper, and she was nervously gripping the bench. Lena's eyes met with Rolf's, who was sitting on Maggie's other side, and both their lips twitched.

"I know you're excited to see dream-boy," Lena muttered to Maggie, as Jordan introduced the Slytherin team, "but maybe try and keep it on the down-low. We've already brought an enemy into the camp–" she jerked her head at Rolf, "–so don't add insult to the injury by letting on you're not only rooting for the opposition, but hoping to shag their captain too."

"Shut up, " said Maggie, not taking her eyes off Wood.

Rolf snickered, and Maggie smacked him over the head without looking.

Wood and Flint shook hands, and even from her position high in the stands, Lena could tell they were trying to break each other's fingers.

Madam Hooch told the players to mount their brooms, and seconds later, the game began.

While Maggie's attention throughout the game was firmly upon the Gryffindor goalposts and the boy protecting them, Lena mostly kept her eyes on the two Seekers: her cousin, and the boy who she'd much rather be related to. Both were high above the action, circling the pitch. However, Lena was kept in the loop of what was happening further down by Maggie's sharp intakes of breath and indignant sounds whenever Wood became involved. When she began to jump up from her seat after Bole and Derrick, the Slytherin beaters, hit both bludgers at Wood and caught him in the stomach, Lena had to pull her down.

It was well into what was perhaps the dirtiest game of Hogwarts Quidditch that Lena had ever seen when Harry first saw the Snitch. He put on a huge burst of speed, stretching out his hand–

Then Malfoy threw himself forward and grabbed hold of Harry's broom's tail, pulling it back. The Snitch disappeared, and as Malfoy let go of the Firebolt, a furious Madam Hooch zoomed up beside the two Seekers.

"Your cousin's a right little prick, Lena," commented Rolf, as Jordan howled into his megaphone, "YOU CHEATING SCUM! YOU CHEATING, FILTHY BASTARD!"

Lena snorted. "Tell me something I don't know."

Naturally, there was a penalty for Gryffindor against Malfoy's blatant cheating, but Spinnet was so angry that her aim was off, keeping the score at sixty-twenty in Slytherin's favour.

It was another twenty minutes before the Snitch surfaced again. This time, it was Malfoy who spotted it first. He dived towards the ground, a look of triumph on his face.

"Come on, Harry," murmured Lena, and at that precise moment, the Gryffindor Seeker streaked downwards, slowly gaining on his Slytherin counterpart. He flattened himself against the broom handle to dodge a bludger Bole sent at him. A moment later he was at Malfoy's ankles... then he was level, and threw himself forward, taking both hands off his broom. He knocked Malfoy's arm out of the way and–

Lena grinned as Harry caught the Snitch. Beside her, Maggie loudly whispered, "Yes!", while Rolf, momentarily forgetting where he was sitting, let out a whoop, drawing the attention of the surrounding and now angry Slytherins.

"Time to leave, I think," said Lena hastily, standing up. She quickly made her way to the stairs, closely followed by Maggie and Rolf.

By the time they had reached the bottom, the entirety of Gryffindor were streaming onto the pitch, their screams of joy deafening. The three of them watched the presentation of the Cup from there.

"It really means a lot to him, doesn't it?" said Maggie softly, as Dumbledore presented the Cup to a sobbing Wood.

Lena shrugged. "It's his passion, I suppose."

Maggie nodded slowly. "Yeah." She watched Wood for a few moments longer, then turned to Lena and Rolf. "Come on, let's head up to the castle, I'm starving."

Lena nodded. She'd leave her congratulations for Harry until the next time she saw him.

But just as they began to leave, there was a loud shout behind them.

"SKELTON!"

They simultaneously turned back around to the pitch. Wood was running towards them, although he clearly only had eyes for Maggie. Lena noticed that behind him, an awful lot of his housemates were curiously watching their victorious Quidditch captain sprint up to a girl from the opposing house.

He came to a stop a few metres away from them, gazing at Maggie. "Hey, Skelton," he said, smiling nervously.

Maggie just stared at him, her mouth slightly parted in surprise. When she still hadn't responded after a few seconds, Lena rolled her eyes and shoved her friend. Maggie stumbled forward, now only a metre away from Wood.

"Wood," Maggie greeted him at last, with an awkward nod. She cleared her throat. "Er, congratulations."

"Thanks," replied Wood, running a hand through his sweat-soaked hair. "Did you, erm, enjoy the game?" His expression suddenly became embarrassed. "I mean, apart from, you know, your team los– not winning," he quickly corrected himself.

"Oh no, it was a great game," said Maggie hurriedly. "I think the best team definitely won."

Wood looked at her like a puppy who'd just been given a treat. "You do?" he said, taking a small step closer.

Maggie nodded. "Yes," she said. "You're very..." she swallowed, as she looked him up and down. "...Damp," she finished distractedly.

"Oh sweet mother of Merlin," Lena muttered to Rolf, pinching the bridge of her nose exasperatedly. "This is excruciating."

Wood glanced down at himself. "It's sweat," he told Maggie, as if it wasn't obvious.

A small, strangled noise escaped Rolf that sounded somewhere between laughter and physical pain.

"Right," said Maggie, edging slightly closer to Wood.

"Yeah," said Wood, edging forward to her.

Lena groaned quietly. "Just snog already," she said under her breath.

Maggie gazed up into Wood's eyes. "You're really good at Quidditch," she said to him, her voice barely above a whisper.

"You're really great," breathed Wood.

'Here it comes,' thought Lena. She could feel Rolf holding his breath beside her.

Wood took Maggie's face in his hands, then crashed his lips down on hers.

"Yes!" Rolf punched the air. "Get it, girl!"

There was an outburst of cheering from the Gryffindors as Maggie, her hands gripping the front of Wood's Quidditch robes, kissed him back enthusiastically. One of the Weasley twins wolf-whistled.

Lena was beaming. As much as she had been teasing Maggie the past couple of months, she genuinely was delighted that her friend had got the boy.

But while everyone else was watching Maggie and Wood snogging each other's faces off, Lena suddenly felt there was one pair of eyes on her. She quickly identified their owner: Remus. He was standing by the side of the pitch with some of the other staff members.

'He must be feeling better, then,' thought Lena. She hadn't seen him since the previous morning, and was still feeling a mixture of concern and irritation towards him.

It was just guesswork on Lena's behalf, as she didn't really have the resources to properly examine the evidence, but she suspected that in order for the Wolfsbane to allow Remus to maintain control over his mind during a full moon, it was siphoning energy from when he was un-transformed. And Lena was very worried about the sustainability of this process.

But it seemed like Remus didn't want to listen to Lena anymore, which was incredibly frustrating. It also hurt a lot more than she would have liked to admit.

She stared back at Remus, and for a moment, she was tempted to march right over to him, and just have it all out with him. Make him acknowledge that he was uncomfortable about what she'd done to Irina, and her refusal to be broken by it. Make him see that of all the terrible things that could happen to a person, lycanthropy wasn't the worst.

But then Remus turned away from her, drawn into conversation with the other teachers, and the sudden urge to confront him dissolved.

After all, it was so much easier, so less frightening, to let anger and hurt stew inside, than to bring it out into the open.

Tuesday 24 May, 1994:

"Petrificus Totalus!"

Lena let out a small whoop as Maggie's Full Body-Bind Curse hit Robert Hilliard squarely in the chest, and the Ravenclaw Prefect went rigid, hitting the ground with a thud.

"Well done, Maggie!" Remus congratulated her, smiling warmly. He quickly performed the counter-curse on Hilliard, and helped him to his feet. "Yet another victory to Slytherin. What's the score now, Fakhir?"

Kahn grinned. "Six-to-two," he informed him, and there was a cheer from all the Slytherins.

They were in the Great Hall for their Defence Against the Dark Arts class today. It was their last week of normal classes before they began a three week long study period for NEWTs, and Remus had wanted to give the class a proper opportunity to practise duelling. So they had pushed the house tables to the sides of the Hall to create a decent space, and were having a small Slytherin versus Ravenclaw competition.

"Well," said Remus, "I think that was our last pair, which is just as well, since it's lunchtime in a couple of minutes. Very well done, all of you! Your duelling capabilities really are excellent, particularly with the, er, uneven standard of teaching throughout your time at Hogwarts–"

"Hold up, Professor," interrupted Aloysius Burke. "Not everyone's had a turn." He looked at Lena. "Lestrange hasn't duelled yet."

All heads swivelled to Lena, who was sitting on one of the house tables.

She shrugged. "There's an odd number in our class, someone had to be left over. Besides," she added with a dry smile, "I'm fairly confident in my duelling skills, I don't think I need the extra practise the rest of you do."

"Maybe you don't," said Terrence Higgs, "but wouldn't it be, uh, educational for us to see you in action?"

There were hurried nods and murmurs of agreement from the rest of the Slytherins. Even Maggie looked eager.

Lena looked across at the Ravenclaws, who were sitting on the tables on the other side of the Hall. "Any of you fancy another round?" she called out, quirking an eyebrow.

In response, she received a lot of shakings of heads and various versions of, "Nah, I'm good, thanks."

"No, Lestrange," said Thaddeus Accrington. "Not against any of them." He turned and looked pointedly at Remus, who squirmed slightly as the rest of the class followed Accrington's gaze.

"Oh, I don't think so," said Remus quickly, studiously avoiding Lena's eyes. "As I said, it's lunchtime now and the rest of the school will be wanting to use the Hall to eat. So–"

"Oh, come on, sir," interjected Burke. "Just one quick duel. Doesn't Lestrange deserve the same opportunity to practise as the rest of us?"

"I'm sure it won't hurt her to miss it," replied Remus evenly. "Now, off the tables, everyone, so I can move them back–"

There were cries of protestation from both sides.

"Please, Professor–"

"But we've never seen a proper duel before–"

"Think how much we'd learn from watching both of you–"

"That's enough," said Remus loudly, beginning to look annoyed. "Class is over, collect your things and–"

"He just doesn't want to do it because he's afraid of losing in front of all of you." The words were out of Lena's mouth before she knew what she was saying.

The rest of the Hall went silent. For the first time since the Quidditch Cup, Remus looked directly at Lena, his eyes narrowed. He clenched his jaw.

"I beg your pardon?" he said coldly.

She was in dangerous territory, but a recklessness, born out of weeks of annoyance, frustration and hurt bubbling inside her, had quite suddenly overtaken Lena. She wanted a fight.

"I said," she answered calmly, inspecting her nails uninterestedly, "that you're scared of me making you look like a fool."

The tension that had filled the Hall could have been cut with a knife.

Remus slowly advanced towards her. "My refusal to duel you," he said quietly, "is not a matter of my pride. It is logistical."

Lena looked up at him, a sneer on her lips. "Sure it is."

Remus' eyes flashed in anger. "Are you suggesting that I'm a coward?"

She cocked her head. "Why yes," she said simply. "Yes I am."

There was a sharp intake of breath from the other students, and in the blink of an eye, Remus was standing right in front of Lena, gripping his wand tightly.

"Get your wand out," he hissed, "and get up." Then he spun around, and marched over to the centre of the Hall, the beginning position for the duels.

Lena could barely contain an expression of glee as she stood up. She had already discarded her robe earlier in the lesson, but now she also pulled off her school jumper. As she approached Remus, she rolled up the sleeves of her shirt and undid her top button to loosen her tie. Remus, meanwhile, had shed his robe and Banished it to the edge of the Hall.

Whispering in excitement, the rest of the class moved closer to the Hall's centre, forming two lines on either side of Lena and Remus. Kahn was allocated the position of referee.

"All right, then. Backs to each other," he told Remus and Lena. "Now, take ten paces..."

As they began to take their steps, Accrington began to slowly clap in time with their footfalls, and the rest of the class joined in.

"Now turn and face your opponent," Kahn called out over the clapping, which started to build in speed as Lena and Remus halted and turned. "On the count of three, you will fire your first spells. Remember," he added, "the duel is only over when one of you yields, or is incapacitated to the point where you can't make that decision."

Lena smirked at Remus, who glared back at her. "One minute," she said to him, twirling her wand in her hand. "One minute, and you'll be begging me for mercy."

Remus raised his eyebrows, and pushed his sleeves up. "Be careful, Lena," he warned her lightly. "Keep talking yourself up like that, and the only thing you'll prove yourself to be is a disappointment."

"Wands ready," said Kahn, and two opponents raised their wands, moving into their starting positions. "And one..."

The clapping ceased as the class collectively held their breath.

"... Two... three."

Remus knew Lena well enough to know that she would have a non-verbal spell ready to go the moment Kahn reached 'three', so he prepared himself with a Deflection spell.

Sure enough, a jet of red light shot out of Lena's wand, which Remus was able to deflect. Another two streams of red light followed in rapid succession, and Remus just managed to keep them at bay too.

Instead of continuing with the onslaught, Lena moved out of her attacking position, and assumed a defensive. Remus decided to hold back on an attack for a little longer, and the two began to slowly circle each other.

He had a suspicion that Lena had known exactly what she was doing by calling him a coward. She had wanted to rile him up. He wasn't an idiot – he knew she'd been mad at him since the Friday morning she had found him ill in his office. And he also knew that she thought he was angry with her.

He wasn't, of course. Frustrated by her inability to acknowledge that his lycanthropy was such a serious condition, and that it wasn't just a monthly problem, yes. But the only person with whom he was angry was himself. And he was doing his best to distance himself from Lena because she was the reason for his self-directed anger.

She was a deeply damaged young woman, and instead of wanting to fix her, he was attracted to that damage.

Distracted by these thoughts, Remus sidestepped Lena's next attack barely in time. He winced at the slight burning sensation the pale blue stream of light caused as it clipped his shoulder.

'Focus,' he told himself. He had no desire to hurt Lena, but he also had absolutely no intention of losing this duel in front of the class – or at least, not being humiliated in the quite likely possibility of defeat.

He quickly fired off several hexes, all of which Lena batted away effortlessly, her eyes never leaving his face. The corners of her lips turned up in what Remus thought was quite frankly a predatory smile, which sent a small shiver down his spine – a little out of fear, but mostly from anticipation.

He cocked his head slightly at her, silently asking, 'Is this the best you can do?'

Lena clearly deciphered the look, and arched an eyebrow in response. 'Are you sure you want to see the best I can do?' was the reply Remus interpreted.

A second later, there was a flurry of spells from both sides, accompanied by quick footwork, ducking and weaving to avoid the attacks they didn't have time to repel. And all the while, neither pair of eyes left the other. A split-second distraction was a split-second too much. Even the opening of the Great Hall's doors was not enough to break their concentration.

"What's going on?" said Ron, frowning as he pointed at the Great Hall's entrance. The doors had been left open, but a large crowd of students were blocking the way. They appeared to be watching something that was happening inside.

Harry tensed. What if Black had struck again?

"Come on," he muttered to the other two, and began to squeeze his way through the crowd to get inside the Hall. As he drew closer, he started to notice the occasional gasps from the other students, and their awestruck expressions, and he relaxed; surely anything to do with Black would inspire fear, not wonder.

Finally, Harry, Ron and Hermione found a gap in the crowd where they could see what was happing in the centre of the hall, and they joined the other students in their astonishment as their jaws dropped open.

Lena and Lupin were duelling. At least, this was what Harry assumed a proper wizard's duel to be – unlike his experience in Second Year with Lockhart's duelling club. And now, Harry could understand what all the fuss was about. This wasn't just desperately firing off jinxes and hexes at each other. It was... it was... incredible.

Both duellists had removed their robes and rolled up their shirtsleeves. They held their wands as if they were simply extensions of their own arms. They rarely ever said their incantations out loud; Harry assumed neither of them wanted to give away to the other what was coming next.

Lupin's wand movements were sharp and precise. Harry watched as he flicked his wand jaggedly up and down, sending a stream of green fire at Lena, his feet parted in a way that ensured he would be able to quickly sidestep anything she would immediately shoot back at him.

When the green fire was only a couple of feet away from Lena, she sliced her wand downwards through the air, and the fire split in two, both parts swerving around her and whizzing just over the heads of the Seventh Year Slytherins who were lined up on one side of the Hall and crashing into the wall. Lena, however, had not waited to see what happened to the fire – as soon as she had split it, she had in one swift motion brought her wand up again in a figure-of-eight, and shot a yellow jet of light at Lupin, who fired another curse at precisely the same moment. His red light and her yellow collided into each other and exploded, making a loud boom that echoed throughout the Hall.

Lena's wand technique was much more fluid than Lupin's, Harry noticed as they sent another round of spells at each other. She seemed like a very instinctive duellist, as opposed to Lupin's more calculated approach. It surprised Harry. Lena was usually so deliberate in her words and actions – of course, with the exception of when she was angry or upset.

"Bloody hell," murmured Ron, when Lena sent a volley of spells at Lupin in almost unbelievably quick succession, constantly moving as she did so they came from a slightly different direction each time. "How does she get them off so fast? Surely that's not enough time to say the whole incantation that many times, even if it's in her head."

"Perhaps there's a way to abbreviate them," said Hermione, not taking her eyes off the duel as Lupin only just managed to deflect all of Lena's attacks. "Do you think if we asked her after they've finished, she'd tell us, Harry?"

Harry opened his mouth to reply, but was beaten to it by someone else.

"I'm sure she'd be happy to give you a two hour-long lecture on the theory behind it."

The trio's attention was drawn momentarily away from the duel by the arrival of the newcomer. It was Rolf Scamander. He was standing next to Harry, watching Lena and Lupin. Harry couldn't help but notice that unlike everyone else, his expression was less awestruck, and more, well... odd.

Ron and Hermione's gazes were quickly drawn back to the duel as Lupin made a whipping motion with his wand, and what looked like a gold rope lashed at Lena.

But as she waved her wand and appeared to catch the rope, Harry looked back at Rolf, who was chewing on his lip thoughtfully.

Quietly, so as not to be overheard by Ron and Hermione, he asked Rolf, "Is something the matter?"

Rolf glanced down at him. "What makes you think that?" he responded mildly.

Harry shrugged. "I don't know," he admitted.

Rolf eyed him a little longer, then looked back at Lena. Just as Harry thought that Rolf wasn't going to say anything else, the older boy spoke.

"Lena's holding back."

Harry's eyebrows flew up. "This is Lena holding back?" he said, a little stunned. "She's going easy on Lupin?"

"That's not exactly what I meant," said Rolf quickly. "Lupin is good – and that's the problem. She's not holding back her skill, but she's holding back from hurting him." Seeing Harry's quizzical expression, he elaborated, "If he was just average, let alone bad, she could have just Disarmed him or put him in a Full Body-Bind as soon as the duel began. And if it was anyone else who was this good – Snape, for instance – she'd have used some super powerful spell to incapacitate them by now. Nothing irreversible or too Dark, but something with enough behind it to make an opponent yield. But because it's Lupin..." he trailed off, seeming unsure of whether to continue.

Harry felt confused. "I know she likes him more than Snape," he said. "But it's duelling. Nobody goes into one expecting their opponent to be nice, to actively try not to hurt them. That would just be crazy."

Rolf snorted. "Which is exactly what Lena would say," he said quietly. "If she was, you know, thinking straight."

"Why isn't she?" persisted Harry, watching as Lena easily deflected another one of Lupin's curses.

"As I said," answered Rolf, his mouth twitching: "Because it's Lupin."

Opening his mouth to again ask why, Harry stopped as something clicked in his head.

He gaped at Rolf. "Are you saying," he finally whispered, now more than ever not wanting to be overheard, "that you think Lena is in lo–"

He was interrupted by the gasps of surrounding students as lightning suddenly flashed across the Hall's sky-like ceiling. Hastily turning his attention back to Lena as a rumble of thunder filled the Hall, Harry saw that she had raised her wand, rotating it clockwise, and this appeared to be having some sort of effect on the ceiling.

Lupin took this as an opportunity to send a jet of red light at her. But Lena, without ceasing the circular wand movement, held up her free hand, and just inches away from it, the stream of red hit an invisible barrier and rebounded straight back to Lupin, who managed to bat it away.

There were some gasps and many Oohs of surprise at the display of wandless magic. Even Lupin seemed slightly taken aback by it. He appeared to get over his surprise quickly, however, and raised his wand in preparation of another assault. But he paused, distracted, when a continuous stream of silvery-blue light shot out of Lena's wand and up to the ceiling, seemingly connecting the two. There was another flash of lightning, closely followed by more thunder.

Out of the corner of his eye, Harry could see that Rolf had started to grin.

"What's she doing?" he asked the Hufflepuff.

"Oh, I have no idea," said Rolf honestly. "But as Maggie would probably say: this shit's about to get real."

The ceiling-sky was swirling with purple-grey thunderclouds, lightning flashing behind them every few seconds. Rain, almost torrential, began to pour down into the middle of the Hall, causing some of the students to curse and shuffle back out of it. Lupin, who quickly became soaked, tried sending another few spells at Lena, but her wandless shield deflected all of them.

Then, without warning, Lena violently swung her wand downwards, breaking its connection with the ceiling. A huge, fork of lightning struck the floor between the duellists, eliciting shrieks and squeals and cries from the onlookers as their hands covered their eyes to shield them from the blinding light.

And barely audible, over the thunder, the downpour and the exclamations of panic, there came the cry of "Expelliarmus!"

Harry watched as the unprepared Lupin's wand flew out of his hand, and across the Hall to his opponent, who deftly caught it in her free hand. Her own wand was still firmly pointed at him.

"Do you yield?"

Lena's voice rang out across the Hall, clear and strong. Her gaze was intent upon Lupin as she stood there, drenched in the rain of her own making – which had not yet ceased, nor the thunder or flashes of lightning in the ceiling.

And Lupin, equally sopping wet, was staring back at her, his chest heaving. But despite having lost the duel, he didn't look dismayed. He didn't even appear shocked at how Lena had bested him.

No, to Harry, it seemed as though Lupin was looking at Lena as if he had never seen anything so beautiful in his life.

After a long moment, the Defence professor finally replied, "I yield."

"I'm sorry."

Lena shook her head. "No," she told Remus, "I am. I should never have called you a coward."

They were sitting on the edge of his desk in his office, each with a cup of tea in their hands. Lena had come there straight after dinner, not having had a chance to speak to Remus after their duel until then.

"I appreciate that," said Remus, smiling at her gently. "But I knew you were trying to, er, motivate me into duelling. And you wouldn't have felt the need to do that if I hadn't been trying to push you away these past couple of months. I..." he hesitated, before continuing, "I haven't been a very good friend to you lately, when I should have been."

"I told you I murdered my grandmother," Lena pointed out. "I don't think wanting to put some distance between me and yourself was unreasonable."

Remus took a sip of tea. "But that wasn't why I started avoiding you, Lena," he said quietly.

Lena looked at him, surprised. "It wasn't?"

He shook his head. "It was what you said about my self-loathing," he explained. "It... well, it hit me a bit harder than I would have expected."

Lena's insides twisted in guilt. "Remus, I'm sorry, I–"

"Wait," interrupted Remus hurriedly, holding a hand up, "let me finish. It was particularly what you said about it being the biggest reason you found it easy being around me. And it got me thinking, what if that's what this whole relationship is built on – that we're both... damaged."

"And that bothered you?" asked Lena, after a pause.

After he'd taken another sip, Remus carefully replied, "I don't think it's healthy for the foundation of anything to be something that is inherently broken. Sharing in pain can be good for you, but not if that's all there is to share. So," he shrugged slightly, "I distanced myself from you. But when we duelled today, you reminded me that it wasn't everything in your life that has messed you up that initially..." he searched for the right phrase, "well, drew me to you."

Tilting her head curiously, Lena inquired, "Then what was?"

Remus looked her in the eye. "That you're brilliant."

Lena blushed and stared down into her tea. "Well," she said, taking a few seconds to find her voice, "you're not so bad yourself."

And he really wasn't. She had known he wouldn't be bad at duelling, but she hadn't been expecting him to be as good as he was. Which was foolish of her, really – he had fought in and survived a war, after all.

She had also been surprised by the feelings that had stirred inside her certain... lower places at the end of their duel, when he had stood there, slightly out of breath and soaking wet. Combined with how well he had performed in the duel, the whole effect had made her more attracted to Remus than she'd even been. And nearly eight hours later, those feeling were yet to subside.

The sound of Remus chuckling made her finally look back up at him.

"I try my best," he told her, his eyes twinkling.

Lena returned his smile, but not trusting herself to say anything else in that moment, simply took a gulp of tea.

"You must practise duelling with Valeriya a fair amount during your holidays," commented Remus. "I can't imagine you get much of an opportunity here."

"Principally with her, yeah," confirmed Lena. "But I've had a few chances to go up against some of her friends and associates."

"Lost any of them?"

"Not in the last few years, no."

"And before that?"

Lena wrinkled her nose. "Before then doesn't count," she said delicately. "And what about you?" she asked, intrigued. "Who taught Remus Lupin his moves?"

"I think it's mostly down to the fact that we just practised duelling more regularly in Defence back in my day," admitted Remus. "What with there being a war on and all. And with my most frequent partners being James and Sirius–" He broke off, a shadow passing over his face.

Lena considered quickly changing the topic, but an intense curiosity at the mention of Sirius' name had sprung up inside her. They hadn't discussed him much since she had told Remus she'd figured out his previous friendship with her cousin. Pretty much all she knew was that Remus, Sirius, James Potter and Peter Pettigrew had been the closest of friends at Hogwarts, but that had all been torn apart when the Potters had gone into hiding via the Fidelius Charm and made Sirius their Secret Keeper.

In the end, she was saved from having to make a decision when Remus made it for her.

"You really never saw him?" he asked her. "At any Death Eater meeting?"

"Well, not every single meeting was held at the Lestrange Estate," said Lena. "But most of them were, and he was never at any of them. And Bellatrix certainly didn't seem to know he was on their side. As far as she was concerned, he was a Blood Traitor like her sister Andromeda." She screwed up her eyes, trying to remember everything she had seen and heard when the Death Eaters congregated at her house. "But if I recall correctly," she told Remus, "most of them did know there was a spy in– what was Dumbledore's group called again?"

"The Order of the Phoenix."

"Right. I'm sure I heard on a couple of occasions Death Eaters mentioning there was a rat in the Order."

Remus suddenly went very still, his face paling.

Alarmed, Lena asked, "Remus, what's wrong?"

"They said that?" he said tightly. "They used that exact word: rat?"

Lena frowned. "I'm pretty sure that's the term they used. Why? It's not a particularly unusual metaphor."

Standing up, Remus put his mug down on the desk. "That's the thing, Lena," he said to her, his face grave. "I'm worried it wasn't a metaphor."

Thursday 2 June, 1994:

Lena strolled down the corridor leading to the Slytherin Dungeon's entrance, returning from her Prefect patrol. She would not, however, be heading to bed when she reached her dorm. No, for Lena, her night was only just about to begin – a night of making her next batch of Moramortis. She'd already set up a cauldron early that morning, and put in the first lot of ingredients.

Turning the corner, she came to a halt. Standing a few feet in front of her were an intertwined Maggie and Oliver Wood, saying a rather enthusiastic goodbye after their date.

Lena coughed loudly. "Ahem."

Maggie and Wood broke apart with a noise like a plunger, their faces panicked until they saw who it was.

"Oh," said Maggie, relieved. "It's just you."

Lena quirked an eyebrow. "Yeah, just me – the Head Girl whose job it is to report students she catches breaking curfew."

Wood began to look anxious again, but Maggie just snorted. "Oh please, like you would."

Lena sighed theatrically. "No, I suppose I'm far too much of a benevolent leader to do that." She looked at Wood. "But Weasley, on the other hand, is a megalomaniac and still out patrolling. So I'd hightail it back to the Gryffindor Tower before he gets there first and realises you're not there, if I were you."

Wood nodded quickly. "Right, thanks for the warning." He pecked Maggie on the cheek, smiling at her affectionately. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you then," replied Maggie softly.

As Wood was about to pass Lena, she shot a hand out, stopping him. "Just a second," she said pleasantly. "We haven't really had a chance to talk since you started dating Maggie, so we don't know each other very well."

"Erm, I suppose not," said Wood, looking a little confused.

"Well," Maggie cut in, "I'm sure that can be rectified another time." Evidently, she had an idea of what Lena was going to say, and was hoping to avoid it. "But now, Oliver really needs to be getting back–"

"Yes," continued Lena, ignoring Maggie, "so I would just like to take this opportunity–"

"You're just going to do it anyway," muttered Maggie, crossing her arms and adopting a long-suffering expression.

"– To tell you," Lena went on, "that if you ever hurt Maggie, I will rip out your larynx and let you drown in your own blood."

Wood instinctively took a step back.

"Oh my god," mumbled Maggie , "you're so embarrassing."

Lena smiled sweetly at Wood. "Just thought you ought to know that."

Wood stared at her for a couple of seconds, before looking between Maggie and Lena. Then, appearing to come to some sort of resolution, he swallowed and took a step closer to Lena.

"Lestrange," he told her, "if I ever hurt Maggie, I hope that's the least you would do to me."

Maggie made a small surprised noise, and looked at Wood as if she would very much like to snog him one more time before he left.

Lena simply winked. "Right answer, Wood." She jerked her thumb back. "Now, get a move on."

Wood flashed one more smile back at Maggie, then left.

"I've decided I approve of your boyfriend," announced Lena to Maggie as they walked up to the Slytherin Dungeon's entrance. "Astutia."

"And why would we need your approval?" grumbled Maggie as the wall opened.

"Oh, you don't need it," said Lena, leading the way through the passage. "But you want it."

Maggie didn't bother replying; there was no need for affirmation.

After they'd made their way through the common room and were heading down the stairs to their dorm, Lena spoke again. "However, as much as I'm supporting you in this – please tell me you've looked into contraceptive potions."

"Lena!"

"What?" said Lena, shrugging. "If that display I walked into back there is anything to go by, the two of you aren't having any trouble embracing the physical side of a relationship, and I just want to make sure you're prepared." Reaching their dormitory door, she opened it and walked inside.

Maggie shut the door behind them. "I appreciate that concern," she told Lena in a strangled sort of voice. "But Oliver and I aren't quite at that... stage, yet."

"Maybe not," said Lena, walking over to her bed to greet Mortimer, who was on her bedside table. After saying hello, she looked back at Maggie. "But it would be wise to at least start thinking about getting your hands on that sort of protection."

"Fine," replied Maggie, flopping down onto her bed. "I'll look into it." Then she added slyly, "Seeing as you and Lupin can't be that far off from shagging each other senseless, are you looking into it too?"

Lena, who was making her way over to the cauldron in the corner of the room, paused mid-step as she felt a twinge in her stomach. "That's really not a concern for me," she said quietly.

"Oh, come on," said Maggie. "In less than two months, you'll no longer be a student, and there'll be nothing to stop you from–"

"Maggie, I can't have children."

It was the first time she had said those words aloud, and the amount of weight behind them surprised Lena.

"What do you mean?" asked Maggie, frowning as she sat up.

Lena started walking to the corner again, glancing over at Maggie. "This," she said simply, pointing at the cauldron. "The Moramortis. One of its side-effects is that it causes infertility."

Maggie stared at her, seemingly lost for words.

"I mean," continued Lena, sitting down behind the cauldron, "it's not like I'd ever given much thought to, you know, being a mother. And on the rare occasion I did, it wasn't about whether I wanted kids or not, but just how bad a mother I'd make."

Getting off her bed, Maggie came over to sit on the other side of the cauldron.

Lena wasn't really sure why she was telling Maggie all this now. After the initial odd feeling she had gotten when Healer Ghali told her about the infertility, Lena had shoved the whole thing to the back of her mind, and hadn't properly thought about it at all over the last twelve weeks. But now that it had cropped back up, she couldn't stop talking about it.

"But then I just got this weird feeling," she explained to Maggie, "when Healer Ghali told me I wouldn't be able to have children. Not because I wanted them, but because I..." she paused, not sure how to put it into the right words. "But because," she said at last, "I always thought that it would be my choice to make."

Maggie nodded. "I get that," she said quietly.

"Do you?" asked Lena, a little surprised. She started adding ingredients to the potion. "Because I'm not sure I fully do."

Pulling up her knees so she was hugging them, Maggie said, "Well, neither of us really had great experiences with our own mothers growing up, yours being an abusive bitch and mine..." She hesitated. "I might not have much memory of her, but I've learnt what happened."

Lena momentarily paused her potion-making, looking up at Maggie. "You don't have to tell me."

Maggie took a deep breath. "It's fine," she told Lena. "Basically, she had me when she wasn't ready to be a mother. She didn't know how to take care of a baby, never mind herself." She stared down at her knees. "She overdosed. That's how she died." Before Lena could say anything, Maggie looked back up at her, and continued, "What I'm trying to say is that our childhoods taught us that not every woman has maternal instincts. A mother's love for a child, particularly one that overpowers everything else, isn't universal. That's why–"

"That's why it being a choice has always been so important to us," finished Lena, resuming her potion-making. "Knowing whether we want children or not is supposed to be a moment in our lives that becomes a part of who we are. Now I never have to make that choice, it feels like something is missing." She glanced up at Maggie, half-smiling. "When did you get so smart about emotions and shit?"

Maggie laughed softly. "I guess that after seven years of being friends with you, I was bound to start thinking about this kind of stuff on my own." Her face brightened. "But going back to this summer–"

Lena sighed. "Oh, here we go," she muttered.

"–are you thinking of trying to start something with Lupin?"

"Maggie, I don't even know if he's interested," said Lena exasperatedly.

"He is!" insisted Maggie. "Seriously, how can someone as smart as you be so thick about this?"

"Because I know he's not an idiot!" argued Lena. "I'm hardly a catch, what with all the pretty undesirable family connections, emotional and physical health instability, and the, you know, murder stuff."

Maggie shrugged. "Lots of people are into some weird and freaky shit."

"Thanks," said Lena wryly, "I feel so much better already."

"Look," said Maggie forcefully, "are you in love with him?"

Although Lena kept making the Moramortis, her brain temporarily froze. In love with Remus?

At least after the duel, she now knew she fancied him a bit. And she could deal with that. But love, compared to 'fancy', was such a big word. A messy, complicated and quite frankly dangerous word to Lena. To care about someone was all right. She cared about quite a few people: Maggie, Rolf, Harry, Valeriya, and certainly Remus. But she had only ever really loved one person. And of all the things in her life that had screwed her up, loving him was probably the biggest.

Not that the past week had given her much opportunity to investigate possible romantic feelings towards Remus. She was too concerned about him. He'd been acting strangely ever since she'd told him about how the Death Eaters had referred to Sirius as the 'rat in the Order', and he wouldn't tell her precisely why this had upset him so much. But now they were finally back on good terms with each other, Lena had no desire to push him away again so soon by pressing him on the matter. She'd find out what the problem was eventually – of that, she was certain.

"No," she finally told Maggie, "I'm not. But he's important to me." She cleared her throat. "As is making this Moramortis – you know, the life-and-death kind of important. So if you could finish pestering me and let me get on with it, I'd greatly appreciate it."

Maggie rolled her eyes and huffed, but stood up. "Okay," she said, "but we will be resuming this conversation tomorrow."

"Oh joy."

Maggie picked up her stuff for her shower. Just as she was about to go into the bathroom, she paused. "Lena?"

"What now?" replied Lena, not taking her eyes off the measuring cup she was using.

"Thank you for telling me about the... the infertility thing." She gave Lena a small smile. "It means a lot that you felt like you could share that with me."

Lena finally looked over at her, and returned the smile. "Thank you for understanding. And helping me understand too."

Maggie nodded, then disappeared into the bathroom. But a moment later she popped her head out again. "And Lena?"

"Yes?"

She grinned. " I'd rip out a guy's larynx for you too."

Fun fact: To Be Human is now longer than Goblet of Fire. So, that's... something, I guess.

Thank to everyone who reviewed the last chapter, and who has followed/favourited this story. As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts/feelings/criticisms on Chapter 31, and any predictions. Feedback is incredibly useful :)

Just a quick response to QuirkyMurderSubject: Believe me, I was concerned when I started writing this that nobody would be interested in reading a story where one half of the main pairing doesn't show up for 17 chapters. But that was a good motivation for me to make Lena as compelling a character as I could, and I'm delighted that she didn't bore you :) Regarding Sirius and Remus, all I'll say for now is that there was never an actual romantic relationship between the two, and Snape was just referring to the fact they were very close friends. But there is, perhaps, more to it than that... which, yes, will be explored later.