Warning: rated M for sexual content and implication of abuse

Chapter 11

When Anna awoke, her body ached in the most wonderful way and she couldn't help the flashes of the night before that played through her mind.

The picture of his body fully exposed.

Kristoff sliding into her for the first time, stretching her to fit him perfectly.

Her name on his lips, whispered like a sweet prayer.

His thumb on her to push her over the edge with him.

Waking him up a few hours later by taking him into her mouth.

Exploring each other's wants and needs in the darkness while surrounded by the raging storm outside.

All the images were stirring the familiar tightness in her stomach and Anna was eager to explore that again with her bedmate. But first, the bathroom. Who knows what she looked like and a quick toothbrush never hurt anyone. As she removed her bare body from the cocoon of warmth that was the bed, goosebumps spread down her limbs. The sun was up but the winter storm was still in its final stages so the room was washed in a somber light. But it was plenty to help Anna find her thick wool socks. After digging around a little more, she finally found Kristoff's t-shirt and brought it up to her arms. Just as she was lifting it to cover her head she heard the last thing she ever wanted to hear.

"What's that scar from?"

Anna wasn't as graceful as she had hoped when she got out of their bed. But losing her warmth was what stirred Kristoff awake completely. Watching her bare skin stretch in the dim light reignited his excitement from the night before. But then he saw it. A large scar on the left side of her lower back. The skin was still so red and angry that Kristoff could easily tell it was a recent wound, definitely less than a year old. Whatever caused that scar was major. But Anna has never mentioned it before. And Kristoff did not miss her body going rigid at his question.

Anna's body refused to move but her mind was flooded with old memories.

Getting to the hospital was a blur. She wasn't sure why the back seat of her Uber was wet but the guy driving just offered her some gum and played some shitty music so Anna ignored it.

A nurse met her before she could even make it to the check-in station. It must have been a slow night. The woman looked pleasant and was probably in her mid-30s but Anna was having a hard time listening to what she was saying. Her head was throbbing and her back was wet…? Her driver was definitely getting a bad rating for this.

Why was she here again?

"My back." Her mouth said without her brain's permission.

She doesn't remember how she got to the room she was now in. A wheelchair? Or did she walk here?

Lying face down felt nice, the table was cool, even with the crinkly sanitation paper covering it. She was just going to close her eyes for a second…

When she came to, the nice nurse was moving her into a sitting position on the table. Her shirt was gone and she was sitting there in her bralette and leggings. The fabric of her bottoms felt off, they were stiff and crusty and an unfamiliar shirt sat folded next to her. Her hands moved instinctively to put it on. It was scratchy and too big and was probably from the lost and found.

"How does that feel?"

"Um, fine." She wasn't about to complain about the shirt.

"I was able to get the remaining glass out of your back and sutured it. You're going to need to keep them dry for 24 hours. Here, this has all the details of what you need to know." The woman handed Anna a single white piece of paper. Trying to focus on the tiny words only made Anna's vision swim.

"Um, uh- thank you."

"What's your pain level?"

Anna looked up confused by her phrasing, "My what?"

"Your pain level: on a scale of one to ten how much pain are you in?"

Anna looked at the wall behind the nurse and tried to feel her body and what hurt. Her head, definitely her head. Her throat was a little rough but maybe she was catching a cold… And her back stung, especially when she inhaled. She wasn't looking forward to getting off this table and walking.

"A six I guess."

"Hmm." The nurse pursed her lips and eyed Anna. "Miss, do you need help?"

"I thought you already helped me?" This conversation was so weird. What was this lady's deal?

The nurse reached up and brushed her fingers near Anna's left temple. Pain flared around her eye and Anna instantly flinched back. That single reminder triggered the vision of Hans in his apartment. Now she remembered why her head hurt, why her leggings were crusty, why it was hard to fucking swallow.

Now Anna knew why the nurse asked if she needed help. Tears burned Anna's eyes at all the feelings flooding her system-anxiousness, fear, embarrassment.

"I don't know." It was the truth.

No one had ever seen the scar. Anna made sure of that. Avoiding any and everyone she knew while the bruise on her face healed had been the hard part (the nurse had written her professors asking for them to modify her finals due to medical complications), but hiding the scar was pretty easy. She had always worn an undershirt in the locker room or she changed in the stall after a shower. She only wore a one-piece in the summer, there were plenty of styles that were trendy. And she had been careful.

Until now.

Her scar, her past, Hans, they were all the furthest thing from her mind this morning. Sliding on the shirt the rest of the way down her body, Anna schooled her voice, "Oh I just fell." She made a grab for her shorts, all feeling of sexual desire gone from her self-confidence. Kristoff eyed her as she dressed, "You know I can tell when you're lying, right? But the fact that you're lying about an enormous scar is..." he didn't even have words to finish the sentence but his brain thought 'fucking terrifying'.

Anna's heart sank. "Kristoff, leave it alone." her back remained to him.

"Leave it alone? Anna what are you talking about? Look at that thing!" Kristoff was flabbergasted as he sat up all the way in their bed. He made a quick grab for his underwear and was standing in front of her before she could even process what was happening. Fucking hell. She couldn't even look at Kristoff—this man who had so truthfully told her he loved her and had proven it with his body—was giving her a look that broke her inside. How could she tell him about that night? How could she relive it to this beautiful man that looked at her as if she held the world in her hands? What would he think of her then?

The pressure in her chest was building to the point of agony. Imagining Kristoff's reaction cut her breath short and momentarily blurred her vision. "I-I, I fell." Her voice was weak and stammered. Her wrists burned as if acid ran through her veins. Before her mind could understand what was happening, she was running.

Kristoff was stunned at her sudden disappearance and stared at the spot she had just been while the external door vibrated off the jam. Quickly his mind jumped into gear, "Anna!" He threw on his clothes as fast as he could and he took off after her.

She was fast, he could give her that. Kristoff was immediately met with an icy blast of wind as he left their cabin. Snow had been falling since yesterday afternoon and had quickly turned into a winter storm. It was supposed to subside this afternoon but they were still in the thick of it now. Of course he grabbed his jacket because Anna was wearing his shirt...his mind flashed back to exactly what Anna has been wearing—a t-shirt, shorts and socks. Kristoff's mind spun in urgency knowing he had to get Anna back inside as soon as possible.

"Anna!" He screamed into oblivion. Snow swirled around him, clouding his sight line. It was impossible to see more than 20 feet in front of him. Spinning in circles, he couldn't even see the huge path that had been shoveled the night before. Moving away from the cabin-Kristoff's running shoes doing little to combat the fresh powder-he continued to scream her name. Staggered movement to his left caught Kristoff's eye as he instinctively moved towards it. Through the flurry he could make out the shape of Anna and sprinted towards her, "Anna!"

Finally hearing her name, Anna turned towards the voice. Without any further conversation, Kristoff swooped her up and ran back towards the cabin.

"My feet hurt." Anna weakly said.

Kristoff squeezed her tighter to his chest, "Good. That means you can still feel them."

Anna just wanted to close her eyes for a bit, especially when the frigid cold was replaced by comforting warmth. Kristoff knew from his Physiology courses that Anna was suffering from superficial frostbite and he needed to rewarm her skin with a warm bath. He placed her gently on the bed to turn on the tap in the tub and then quickly returned to undress her. Although they had been intimate the night before, this felt different to Kristoff. Anna was not all the way conscious and he didn't want her to think he was taking advantage of her. "Anna, I need to take your clothes off to get you in the bath." He spoke loudly and clearly but received nothing in return. Once he removed all of her sopping clothes, he took her into his arms again, cradling her. The bath water wasn't too hot—he knew that shocking the system with too hot of water could be detrimental. Kristoff continued to support Anna's head as he straightened her out in the tub. Now he could only wait. If she didn't warm up after 15 minutes he would have to call a ranger.

Thankfully, it only took about 4 minutes for Anna to regain consciousness. Kristoff had never taken his eyes off her face.

"Hey," his relief was palpable and he couldn't help if his eyes got a little misty.

"Hnnnn." Was the most he got from Anna as she sat up on her own.

After a beat, Anna whispered harshly, "I'm so fucking stupid." then she covered her face in embarrassment. She had always prided herself in keeping her emotions in check when her inner monologue tore her apart, but this was her breaking point. Hot tears streamed down her face as her body shook in silent sobs. In the four short months of knowing Anna, Kristoff had never seen her like this. Not even a shadow of this. Something had scared her to the point of risking freezing to death to avoid telling him about it. Kristoff had no words. He had pushed her the first time and she bolted. He knew something was terribly wrong but he could not force it out of Anna. She cried for what felt like forever. But Kristoff remained solid. Not moving, not speaking. Just being a presence for her, silently telling her he wasn't going anywhere.

As her sobs subsided, Anna began to breathe again, deep full breaths. Months of fear and self-loathing were released in those tears. And still Kristoff stayed.

And now she knew it was time. Gathering all her courage she released it, "The ex boyfriend I told you about at my junior college, one night he lost his temper and hit me. I thought he was going to- to kill me. But instead he threw me into his glass coffee table. When it shattered a large piece stabbed me in the back. It cut through my latissimus dorsi but I was lucky enough that it didn't hit my kidney. So that's what the scar is from."

A few seconds passed between them as Kristoff took in everything she just said. So many thoughts swirled through his mind but he filtered them all out for future conversations, "I know that was hard to say out loud. I'm so grateful that you trust me enough to share that with me. Whatever you need, I'm here." He was so calm. So solid. Where she felt like the howling snow storm outside, he was the sturdy mountain that did not waiver.

"Can you get me a towel?" Tears were still rolling down her face but she was looking at him for the first time now. Her large blue eyes were rimmed in red from all her tears and her nose and cheeks were burned from the weather outside. She was the picture of a broken woman, but Kristoff knew she would fight this.

"Will you let me check your toes first?" His eyes searched hers. Without questioning him, Anna lifted her feet from the warm water. Kristoff pitched each toe to make sure there was proper capillary refill. When each one passed his appraisal, he reached for the large white towel on the shelf. Turning to give her privacy, Kristoff was surprised by the embrace he then felt from behind. He felt her mumble more than he heard it, "What?" Kristoff asked as he turned to face Anna. She easily accommodated the shift.

"I said...I'm fucked up." She paused to take a deep breath, calming her voice, "Ever since that night, my mind has been...against me. Any and every mistake is magnified and vilified. What you told me last night, the words you said, I want to return all of that. You deserve to be loved so fiercely Kristoff. And I think I can do that, maybe I already am... it's all just going to take me some time. And I hope you'll give it to me. I know I've already asked for a lot but-."

"You take as much time as you need. My love is not fragile."

AN: These last two chapters were outlined very early on in this story. But sometimes typing it all out takes a while. Thanks for waiting!