Small Steps
A sleepy kunoichi—nicknamed the Narcoleptic Ninja—has big dreams. Wanting to save her teammates Obito, Kakashi, as well as her sensei and his love, the sleepy kunoichi will have to work hard to see her dream come true. Reborn!OC
academy akemi-chan: education
years til nine tails: 8 years, 6 months
akemi: 9 years, 11 months
location: hidden leaf village (spring)
"Still knocked out?" says Sayaka for the twelfth time this night.
Gramma gave me the fan hour ago to blow cool air on Mom's head. She regularly replaces the lukewarm towel on her with a towel soaked by cold water. "Please understand Hanae has had quite a fright today. Did you call your mother?"
Sayaka waves the wrinkled letter. "As soon as she got our letter, she said she bolted for Maple Village."
I shiver.
"Did you tell her what Akemi did?"
"Yup!"
"But not what she did, correct?"
"Yup!"
"I see." Gramma chuckles quite deviously. "If I'm correct, she'll probably forget to punch you, Akemi."
I wince on instinct. I've only ever made Mom cry three times:
Once, when I stopped spending all the day sleeping and truly woke up.
Twice, when I called her name for the first time.
And thrice, this whole affair.
Every time I make Mom cry, her twin sister, my aunt, Hisano Minakura punches me.
Before, she would punch an arm or knock her knuckles against my head. If she knows I'm going to become a ninja, she's not going to hold back anymore.
"Auntie is scary..." I complain.
"It can't helped, though," Sayaka laughs. "I think if you were rejected, Mommy would certainly punch you harder."
My aunt, who I call Auntie, is also Sayaka's mother.
She's not an abusive person at all. It just so happens Auntie made a vow to Mom she'll hit all who make her cry, which sort of meant she'd have to hit family members due to how vague her promise was. Of course, Mom told her to just redo the promise, but Auntie, as prideful as she was, refused.
Judging by her furious strokes and holes torn in the paper, I'm in line for a serious punch.
"I cant wait to go school shopping with An-chan!" Sayaka, having to be the spawn of Auntie, is way more used to the woman than me.
"Oh, that's right," Gramma adds gleefully, "she'll need a lunch box and a nice backpack." She has nothing to worry about. Auntie only modified her vow once: she'll hit anyone with the exclusion of Gramma. Gramma is the only person Auntie fears.
Mom, I beg, why did you have to cry?
Auntie arrives that morning, hollering so the whole house can hear, "Good morning! Guess who's back from her mission?"
Sayaka happily runs from Mom's room. "Mommy!"
Gramma walks slowly down the stairs with me behind her. When we get to the main room, Sayaka is rambling to Auntie... who locks her eyes on me.
I gulp.
Mom and Auntie are twin sisters, so they share the same charcoal eyes and hair. Auntie's bob is shorter and more angular, though, stopping in line with her nose. Unlike my mother's soft pink robe, Auntie loves her red cropped jacket she keeps zipped up and her ripped baggy pants with bandages that stop midway between her knees and ankles. From her stomach, she's lean enough to where her abs are exposed, which makes seeing her all the more terrifying.
"If it isn't An-chan!" Her voice is the perfect pitch of a stereotypical young boy bully. "Come give Auntie a big hug!"
I wince. "Um... what about an air hug...?"
She snickers. "Aw, so cute! An-chan thinks that hiding from me is gonna work knowing if I wanna punch, I punch."
"We understand Akemi made Hanae cry, but think about why she made her cry," Gramma says loud enough to be heard.
Auntie pouts. "Okay. Why?"
Sayaka jumps in without warning anyone, "Oh, An-chan passed the entrance exam to the Ninja Academy yesterday!"
"Woah, woah, woah, whatty?" Auntie swivels her head between Sayaka and me. "Did the standards go down? Is it pity? Did she bribe them?"
Sayaka shakes her head blissfully. "It's in the congratulations letter!" With that, she pulls the gold paper from out her sleeve...
Wasn't that in my pocket earlier?
Auntie reads it and her eyes grow comically wide. "H-H-H-Haaaa? Third year? Weapons Technique specialty? You sure this is the right girl?"
"It is! Gramma even showed me how much muscle An-chan's been hiding under those baggy clothes of hers when An-chan was sleeping!"
I give Gramma a look of betrayal. She only smiles. "Sayaka didn't believe me."
"Is that so? I wanna see!"
Gramma pushes me back. "Hisano, we know you're going to punch her."
"Can't I look and punch, Grandmother?"
At this point, I just want to get it over with.
Auntie breathes in deeply and huffs. "It's just so hard to believe our aimless and sleepy Akemi did something like this. I mean, what heck's pushing her to do something like this? It's like she's possessed."
"You know," Sayaka adds, "ever since her first successful mission, she's been slightly different. Maybe An-chan want to complete more missions?"
"But even the feeling I got from completing my first mission wasn't enough to change me."
"That is because you are not Akemi. One day when she is ready..." Gramma watches me. "...she will tell us what gives her this impossible strength. I already knew it all along... you've got the blood of a Hidden Leaf Village ninja within you."
I tilt my head to side. We live in Maple Village. They're aren't any Leaf-born ninja in the family. Is it just metaphorical? Is Gramma trying to sound wise again?
"Everybody, stooop!"
In the hallway is Mom, still pale, but moving around again.
"Nobody's... doing anything," Auntie says, awkwardly smiling.
"Oh, I guess I'm late, but..." Mom gets her resolve back. "Hisano... you can't punch Akemi!"
"Sorry, but it's my vow. I won't knock her lights out too badly." She punches her open hand so hard, the three zippers on her jacket rock and create a noise almost like a windchime.
...it's somewhat amusing to watch, so Sayaka helpfully stops the zippers. The bead of sweat rolling down the side of Auntie's face is wiped away.
"No, I mean," Mom continues, hands resting on he chest, "if you should punch anyone for making me cry, it's me!"
Auntie looks at my mother as if she'd grown a second head. "Huh?"
"That ultimatum..." Mom says meekly, lowering her gaze, "Akemi knew she'd pass. It was only a matter of time before I accepted it. Believe me when I say I don't want her to go down this path. But if this is her dream, then she'll just have to see if it's worth it. There will be so many chances for her to leave the field and if she does, I'll be right at her side. So, in the end, the one to blame for making me cry is my own fear and worry!"
Mom crouches down next to me and pulls me into a tight hug. I forget how special her hugs are. Only my cheek and hands can directly feel the warmth and softness of my mother while the rest of my body is stopped by clothes.
(I want to remember this hug.)
"I can't stand to see you hurting or aching—not after I spent so many years scared you were damaged. I'm so happy you're growing, but you can't forget who you once were. You were a sickly baby who refused to wake up for years. You only improved just five years ago, okay? For your mother's heart, please don't push too hard."
Her heart is racing. Maybe if the wind and birds and villagers were silent... I could hear her heartbeat.
Or maybe it's my own heartbeating as I hug my mother back.
"I understand, Mom."
The magic of the embrace starts wear off the longer it is and the more I hear Auntie softly clearing her throat and Sayaka's gushing.
Wait, how do I end a hug?
(Am I stuck here forever? Um...)
And as soon as I think that, Mom is trembling.
I say, "Are you... crying?"
Unmistakably, Mom responds, "Noooo!" in a tear-filled voice. "Okay, just a little...! It's my fault, though!"
(My mother is precious.)
The moment is of unforgettable sweetness until Auntie says, "Don't tell Hanae, but I'm gonna punch her for her birthday."
"Th-That's okay!" Mom pulls away and wipes at her eyes. "If it's her birthday, I'm fine..."
Oh.
(I think Mom is little mad, too.)
"...that's fine," I sigh, feeling my mother's warmth still lingering slowly fade away.
Auntie claps her hands together. "Okay, Minakura! It's time to do some school shopping! I got the mission money!"
Mom stands up quickly. "H-Hisano, you can't come!"
"Why not? This is an incredible moment!"
"Because you randomly steal things!"
Auntie is a bit of a klepto.
I was told that for a long time. However, I never noticed until it was my sixth birthday and had gotten a tank of fifteen goldfish. It was supposed to teach me responsibility and compassion... since little kids typically aren't the best at it when young... but I really screwed it up. Sometimes I'd forget I already fed them, so I could fed them up to twenty times a day. Sometimes I forgot to clean the tank good, so certain spots were impossibly dirty.
Within a month under my care, eight brave fish remained.
(Or, as Auntie says, the seven who died were lucky.)
I resolved to do better... but that was hard work and I gave up. I expected more dead fish but I found them to all be alive. No other casualties.
So I thought, Maybe I am doing a good job...
It wasn't until a year later when Satoshi entered my room to check up on my fish did I realize my fish were replaced with fake goldfish... and that the goldfish Auntie gave him to cheer him up were actually mine.
It wasn't like An-chan was using them, Auntie shrugged. Wasn't like the fish cared, you know?
"I'll tie my hands together so I can't do nothing," Auntie grins.
"That has never stopped you. I don't know how, but you still stole a snow globe with your hands tied and eyes blinded!"
Auntie looks off into the distance. "Me neither..."
"I'll watch Auntie if we go shopping!" Sayaka vouches.
"You'll just get distracted by fashionable things," Mom says, "or Akemi's adorableness."
Sayaka lowers her hand still smiling brightly. "Guilty is chaaarged!"
How we managed to go school shopping in the past for Sayaka and Satoshi, I'll never know. In the end, Gramma, Mom, and I go shopping (with Mom fighting tears in the checkout line) and by next week, Mom is walking me to the Academy for my first day of ninja school.
Should I be nervous right now? It's a bright and happy day and I don't feel the slightest bit anxious.
Mom, on the other hand, can't stop mumbling anxieties up until the Third Hokage appears before all Academy students and us, chakra radiating warmly in the air, maybe as a nice form of Killing Intent.
I want to sit in the small square with the rest of the kids, but Mom can't let go of my hand. I watch from afar.
Hiruzen Sarutobi is so much younger than I expected. His robes are just beginning to dwarf his figure. The smell of tobacco is very light and his dark eyes shine with warmth.
I don't stay awake for his speech long, however I do wake up to see the excitement on all the kid's faces. Mom hesitantly releases me.
"Be safe, okay?" she says. "I'll be here when you need me."
I nod, hug her briefly, and head upstairs to the third years floor. The door to my classroom is open and the kids inside are talking, not really paying attention to me entering. I can't help but to notice something very crucial.
(Oh bunny gods... thank you.)
The only teacher who wanted me... was the same teacher who believed in the son of the Eternal Genin. If that son was in this class, then...
Asuma, Kurenai, Anko, Hayate, Ebisu, Raidou, Rin...
They are all my classmates.
And... that means... Obito and Kakashi, although I don't see them. No... Kakashi should be already graduated.
Ah.
I'm very, very nervous.
Wh-Wh-Wh-What am I supposed to do with this knowledge?
I mean... I knew I was born before the Second Great Shinobi War, that it happened before I turned one, ended shortly before I finally woke up nearly six years ago.
But.
But.
I didn't expect to be born just two years prior to Kakashi, Rin, and Obito.
(Wh-What kind of luck is this...?)
Oh. Boy.
I'm sharing the same breathing space as important people, a future deadman, and a villain.
Oh, wait.
Where should I sit?
Most of the kids aren't sitting down. Some, like Asuma or Kurenai, are sitting with kids near their desk talking away. Even Rin sits alone, reading a sizeable textbook covered by a book cover, the ideogram for medical on its face.
Rin's a sweetheart, I'm sure she'll let me sit next to her. Thinking that, I walk up the steps to her bench, heart thudding harder and harder. I stop next to her, the window to my back, my shadow spilling over her. With her book in shadows, Rin slowly escapes from the text and looks up at me.
(Don't I seem a bit scary?)
Hurriedly, I lower my head into a small bow and place my hands in front of me. "Um... I'm new... and I don't have a s-seat... You seemed alone, so..."
(That kind of reasoning is horrible.)
"Ah, good morning! It's nice to meet you. I'm Rin Nohara. And you?"
(That kind of reasoning is genius.)
I stand upright. Rin is grinning genuinely.
I point to my chest. "Um... likewise... Akemi Minakura..."
"You're kind of shy, aren't you? It's okay, we're all kinda harmless."
Er, it's more like nervous.
(Isn't that what shyness is?)
Rin scoots over and pats the seat where she was. "Sit, sit."
I obey, trying to not bother her further. But I'm sitting with my backpack on. All the awkward little things inside like my books and lunch are pushing against my back.
"Sitting with your backpack on doesn't seem comfortable," Rin says with an awkward laugh. "I'll put it in the cubby next to my things. It has my name—it's spelled in Katakana."
I take off the teal backpack and hand it to her. "Thank you... sorry to be troublesome."
"It's fine! I was really shy when I first got here, so it's alright." Rin takes my backpack and leans close, whispering, "You should have seen how nervous I got around my crush, too."
She runs and puts up my backpack. I let out a great big sigh.
I'm so exhausted I want to sleep...
But my sleeping habits kinda got me kicked out the local civilian school and into homeschooling. Let's... not.
"Are you good in something?" Rin says once she's settled again. "I'm trying my best with Medical Ninja Techniques. Everyone says I have the best chakra control in the class, so it's only natural I learn this, right? And it makes me happy to help others, so this is perfect!"
I stare at my pencil. "...Weapons Techniques."
"Hm? So you're good at weapons? I would have never guessed! You look like you'd be great at..." Rin pauses for a while and laughs as the silence stretches. "I guess Medical Ninja Techniques? Because you're a girl, so..."
I shake my head. "My chakra... is too weak for that. Using different weapons was to... make up for that difference. But, I guess... I really like it."
"Ah, interesting."
Rin asks a number of casual questions to get to know me. So far, I'm glad. To think of the inane conversations I have memories of as a child... I couldn't bare to repeat them. Can't bare to act so innocent and naive of the world just like my classmates who aren't even a decade old.
"I live in Maple Village... you know, the blood red trees."
"The Minakura aren't really a clan yet. But... we're trying."
"No... I don't really know much about the Leaf..."
"Me as Hokage? Hm... absolutely not."
Rin smiles ruefully. "You're one of the few people who'd say that. You... and Asuma over there."
"...it's 'cause... I'll definitely fall asleep doing paperwork... going to meetings... being a diplomat..."
"Do you think those things are that boring?"
"Uh, no... it's not boring, probably. It's just me."
"Hm?" Rin had always seemed interested in what I had to say, but she seems extra interested now.
"Good morning, everyone!"
Too bad the teacher is here and class is beginning.
The kids scramble to seats. Those already sitting down are saying hi to their teacher and asking about how his break went. After the commotion dies down, from behind his desk, he speaks.
"Welcome back, students. I will be your third year instructor, Kachime-sensei. I see many familar faces. But it seems we have one new student."
Rin tries to hide a giggle as the kids start to look. Some snap to me instantly. Other take a while. All are looking once my teacher Kachime looks directly at me and says, "Akemi, would you stand up?"
My body feels like paper in the wind. Not really wanting to, I rise.
"Thank you. Say your name and your goal, please."
(Would Rin save me...?)
"Akemi Minakura..." My voice is pretty soft but the class is dead silent, so it doesn't matter. "My goal? Um... graduate?"
Laughter... or maybe snickering... breaks the silence. I sit down soon after and whisper to Rin, "Did I mess up...?"
Rin shakes her hands. "It's fine!"
"Very realistic," Kachime says. "Now then, we'll begin our lesson."
Ten minutes into his lecture, I realize I'm not a fast writer. Mom would do all the hard work for me and would just be content if I remembered some of the stuff.
I think I'm going to need outside help with this.
An hour later, something loud slides the door open and runs in. Everyone pauses to see the commotion.
"S-Sorry I'm late!"
"Hurry and sit down somewhere," Kachime orders. "Next time, please arrive more discreetly."
Rin whispers again. "That's my friend Obito Uchiha. He's a little late and kinda funny, but he's so hard working. It inspires me."
Obito Uchiha laughs embarrassedly and searches the rows, only stopping when he sees Rin. His goofy smile is natural and Rin responds with a small smile. Then his eyes slide right. Me.
Oh. Eye contact.
He stares at me, confused and a bit angry.
Not knowing what to do, I wave.
His expression only sours more.
Obito ends up with a seat pretty far from Rin.
Once it's break time between classes, I plan to catch a few minutes of sleeping. It's ruined once seven, ten, twelve children run up to where I sit and start asking questions. Similar to Rin (though without most of the charm), my classmates interrogate me on my life and comment on my replies.
"Maple Village is pretty far, no?" says a girl, gazing at the ceiling.
"No way, it's super close! Though... why did you come so far just to become a ninja? Living outside the Leaf was probably a sign."
"Actually," a young faced Kurenai Yuuhi mentions, holding a finger up, "if she's managed to join us third years, I believe she might be very talented."
(Thank you, Kurenai...)
At her side, Asuma Sarutobi replies, "But... isn't this like that weird kid Might Guy who joined last year? He wasn't really talented."
Kids leap onto Asuma's assumption.
"Kachime-sensei probably felt sorry for her."
"That guy's really nosy like that."
"Who travels from way outside the village to here just to become a ninja who's bad at it? Are you being forced to be a ninja?"
"Look at how airy and slow she looks. She probably believes she can do it, just like that Might Guy."
One girl pats my shoulder, staring at me sympathetically. "Whatever Akemi thinks, she thinks. I mean, it's her life. She can just leave the Academy if she wants."
The kids... most are not malicious but are using logic without care of my feelings. Their self-centered brains and pick and pull my replies to form their own narrative. Why would a very weak-looking girl travel so much every day to be a ninja? If I'm in this class, wouldn't I be just as bad as their Might Guy? Is there any hope for me? The more they talk amongst themselves, the less of a threat I appear to be.
"I wonder how good Akemi says she is at weapons. I can't imagine someone that talks as slow as she does to be all that good."
"It's pity, pity's the reason she's here."
I look behind me, getting the sudden urge to hide.
But the seat next to me is empty. Rin Nohara is nowhere to be seen. And neither is Obito Uchiha.
(I guess... I'm alone in this.)
Rin does return a few seconds before Kachime enters the room, smiling brightly. I debate asking her where she went—it's not as if we're friends. I decide against it when she slides me a paper note reading, "My best friend pulled me away, sorry! I'm not going to eat lunch in here today, so I think this is a great time to find some new friends in class! I believe in you, Akemi!" with semantics more proper than her regular speech.
Once lunchtime comes and most of the students scramble for the cafeteria, I decide to each lunch all by myself. As I tear into my rice rolls, eyes are looking my way. But my body is stuck to this seat, and this rice is glue inside my mouth. Behind me, a girly voice whispers, "She's eating alone? Not even Rin wants to eat with her? That's kinda lonely..."
The afternoons are all ninja lessons. For the first day, we review the official rulebook and review hand signs, with a few classmates racing one another for speed. At the end of the day, all girls head to Kunoichi Class. I finally manage to talk to Rin again as I wait for her to get ready and head out.
"Hanabira-sensei is very beautiful," Rin tells me. "She's a bit of a tough grader, so try your best."
We just discuss what is expected of kunoichi and what our learning objectives are for this term, with tomorrow promising the revisiting of flower language. (To many groans.) After that, the day is done.
Rin spots Obito sitting outside, watching something not too far away. Grinning, she says, "Have a great day, Akemi! I'll see you tomorrow!" She runs off.
I watch her purple kimono-like tunic turn the corner.
The halls are empty and quiet, save for pairs of friends idly taking their time to leave. Backpack straps in hand, I trudge on, staring at the ground.
My first week passes without anything crazy happening.
On Sunday morning, I stop by Nishi-sensei's store. It's still not very active. Nishi-sensei is in the middle of dusting off her products when I step in.
"You know you have to tell me how it's going, right?" she says.
I tell her everything.
"That teacher is a godsend," Nishi-sensei confirms. "Unbelievable... he was the only person who wanted you? As if you were that bad."
(Eh? Sensei, you almost constantly called me hopeless...)
"At any rate, I'm glad you see your work doesn't stop there. As you said, you'll have to work twice as hard to get half as far. Saying it like that, don't those words sound nice? But when you add a little reality in, it's not as nice."
"...um, do you have advice?"
Nishi-sensei scratches her head, jostling her bun. It might actually topple over and spill silky black hair.
(But she stops before anything happens, having made up her mind.)
"Well... I expect to see you on weekends for practice. Since you have to be home by dusk, you'll just have to do a lot of it at home under proper supervision. Expect to be training during the breaks while other kids are slacking off. Besides that... well, since you're barely making it by, I think you should try to become the top kunoichi."
My heart nearly stops. "Eh?"
"It makes sense, doesn't it? If you're number one, there's no doubt you won't pass. Anything less than number one, and you'll probably won't pass at all, because there's always someone better who deserves to pass. If you're aspring for that spot... it won't be easy at all."
That makes total sense. Say if I were fifth kunoichi in class and I take the graduation exam, I could still do well but obviously I'd never have the same potential as number one. Doing well in fifth place is far more different than doing well in first place.
(But that sounds exhausting... I want to sleep...)
"Improving your sucky skills to decent and turning your good Weapons Techniques into great—that's how you'll become number one." Nishi-sensei narrows her eyes. "Ah... also, you'll have to excel in all subjects and in that kunoichi whatever. Most girls really hate that, so they slack off, but don't think that applies to you as well. In short, your life will be about fun as watching a rock walk and you'll have to grow up quickly. Sounds fun? Think not. You can still give up the ninja career whenever."
Nishi-sensei speaks quickly but after slowing her speech down in my head, I say firmly, "Can't quit."
She hangs her head and groans. "Worth a shot. Anyway, if you're serious, you'll be sponsoring my weapons after the first term."
"Why then...?"
"Because the class ranks will be posted. The friends you have now... tension will grow as soon as that poster is added. You're all working together until you discover the same girl who needed you to make an A on her paper is five ranks higher than you. Well... I hated all my classmates, so rank posting was always hilarious to me."
"That sounds... really difficult," I sigh.
"Like being able to be an Academy student wasn't difficult enough," Nishi-sensei says. "So is this where your dream ends? Or are you going to keep going?"
Hard work... is such hard work.
"No, Nishi-sensei..."
small steps chapter 5 | education
My fingers are still shaky and throbbing with pain. I spent all last night trying to take notes faster. Today's the first day to try it out.
Still, they hurt even though I got here early, took a fast nap, and woke up just as Rin sits down. I nod once at her, not eager to move my hands in a wave.
"Good morning, Akemi. Did you not sleep well last night?"
"Huh? I do... I just get sleepy a lot," I say.
"Oh. I heard you sleep during lunchtime and stuff, too," Rin adds, fiddling with her pencil. "I was worried all that traveling was exhausting you."
Nope. I prefer to sleep walk here. "Not at all..."
"Wow," Rin laughs, "you're a human sloth! That's so cute! Your face is just as cute as one of them!"
I... can't complain. "I haven't heard that one..."
Obito always pulls Rin away from me during breaks, leaving me to snooze alone. As I stack my notebooks together in preparation of sleeping, someone's hand grab my wrist. Slowly, I gaze up.
The girl's hair is unnaturally black and shiny, as if ink spills from her head like a waterfall. With the sun being bright outside the windows, her sky blue eyes are shining. A small smile adorns her pale face.
"Are you lonely?" says she, voice high-pitched and girly.
"U-Um..." Not expecting that, I start to think of a response.
"You don't really make an effort to talk to us. Are you shy? Or is there something more?"
Maybe, I think while I can't manage to make eye contact with her, I am shy. Huh. "Sorry..."
"You know what? It's okay. I'll become your friend! Just... tell me what things you're really good at so far! Besides your weapons."
The girl is sming brightly.
"Ah... um... I'm good at history..."
"Oh, that's cool! I really hate how boring history is," she says with a roll of her eyes. "How about you be my friend and help me with it? In return... you won't have to be lonely anymore!"
"Um..."
In the back of my mind, I'm thinking no way. I can't balance all this training and studying with tutoring. On the other side, maybe the whispers will stop and I'll actually enjoy coming here. It's okay if I have to tutor her so I'm not so alone.
But... this friendship... seems too cheap and one-sided. Too superficial.
I breathe in. I say, "...thank you, but... I don't want this kind of friendship..."
"Eh? You do get you don't have any kind of friendship, don't you? You shouldn't be so picky, yunno. If you're not gonna talk to us, why should we do something for you? I'm kind enough to be your friend. This is how you treat me?"
People are beginning to stare. It won't be long before the whispering starts. I need to end this now.
"Let's be friends normally... I'm Akemi Minakura. My goal is to graduate here. Then... you tell me your name and goal. Maybe we can talk about things... we both like."
"Ah, I understand."
Her expression is as frosty as her eyes.
"You're too dumb to get anything," she clarifies. "Let's be friends normally? You being normal isn't getting any friends. Do you even get what that means? Totally not. All you get is how to sleep and make that confused face. Even if we were friends, I couldn't ever like you at all. Next time we meet, could you respond a little faster, too? Don't waste my time."
She walks away all coolly, sits with four other students, obviously ranting. I get the feeling my words are being misunderstood, and that the kids who watched and listened take me even less seriously.
I think I made things worse, not better.
(Beggars can't be choosers. I should have taken her offer.)
Later that day in Kunoichi Class, we're crafting our own weapons to hide within rings. Rin opts for a needle to inject a liquid to make the target sleep. I'm trying to get my ring to unravel and form a shuriken.
"Oh, please, Akemi would forget this was a weapon and'll hurt herself!"
I stare intently at my ring.
"Won't her face be cute though? Accidentally killing herself with her own weapon?"
"Hey, look, she's hardly done anything. Guess something like this is harder than sleeping."
"What has she been good at so far?"
At this, Rin turns around at her desk, saying, "Why are you all talking about Akemi?"
"Ah, Rin... you're too sweet! You wouldn't understand! So don't worry!"
"We'll stooop!"
Rin nudges me. "Sorry. They say they'll stop talking..."
Obviously, that only meant they'll stop talking about me to her face. Because whenever I'm in the general area with classmates, they start talking about me. Eventually, a few boys start to join in. They aren't as sly as the girls, preferring to accidentally throw things at me.
Is this bullying?
I'm being bullied?
Hm... it's been a while, but this isn't unfamiliar. I was certainly picked on because I sleep too much. Now the cycle repeats with clever ninja children.
The Academy isn't much fun at all.
small steps chapter 5 | education
Sayaka enters my room without knocking. "Haven't seen you in a while, An-chan."
I show her my textbooks and papers. "Studying..."
Sayaka crouches next to me, peering at the mess on my table. "Are you sure you're not possessed?"
"Distracting..." I point to the door. "Out."
"Wah, so domineering! But you know... if you need help, just say, 'Big Sister Sayaka, I need you!' and I'll be there!"
"I won't say that... so go."
"Ehhh? I've been through this before, though! I wasn't top kunoichi, but I wasn't dead last."
"Sayaka... please go."
She sits in silence, staring me down. I try to ignore her and continue my notes. Halfway through my sentence, my pencil disappears. Where did it—
Sayaka picks me up and drops me into me bed, falling on top of me. She's heavy and is crushing me. I can't say anything.
"You know, you've been really quiet lately," Sayaka says, voice no longer bright. "Moody... private. You're not my brother, so you shouldn't be doing these things. I bet there's something wrong at the Academy, huh? Something's spoiled the color and glamor and it can't be academics. You're not fervent in your studies. It can't be ninja stuff, because you keep practicing. So what is it?"
She leans away, allowing for me to talk. At first, I don't say anything. With her chin on my head, my cousin has trapped me inside a hug. A hug that I can't say I don't want. But she'll probably never leave or will continue to do this until satisfied. She can be annoying like that.
"It's lonely."
"Lonely?"
Continuing to talk is like an admission of defeat. "I don't have friends... I thought it wouldn't matter, but I don't blend in. I didn't know I was shy... I didn't know just how weird I seem to be going to the Academy... so many things are off about me, so I can't blend in and so I get talked about."
"Ahhhh... people in this world... really dislike things that don't fit."
Sayaka sighs.
"When I was in the Academy, I did everything possible to be just like the prettiest and bestest kunoichi there. She was a Yamanaka, beautiful with a special femininity. Boys loved her, girls who were her friend were on top of the social chain.
"I became her friend for three years, even though it meant losing things that were important to me. To this day, I can't really remember what I used to be like nor can I ask Mommy to remind me. Because then she'll remember and maybe it'll hurt her.
"I think your story can end differently," she murmurs, hugging me tighter. "I don't want to see you change, Akemi. So you have to find someone who'll accept you no matter what. If not that class, than that floor. If not that, that building. As much as I want to rescue you... I can't defeat this enemy. This is yours."
I don't respond.
(It sounds like I'm off to battle a boss.)
I can't say I listen much to Sayaka's words, however. I mean... physical threats are a bit easy to fight. Simplistic. The enemy I face is not only invisible but inside of me.
small steps chapter 5 | education
Much to my dismay, we don't cover weapons lessons during the first few weeks. It's nothing but basic physical conditioning, swimming, and basic martial arts. It's hard for my talent to shine through. Even harder: making top grades doing something I'm lousy in. Girls are graded more leniently than boys, which only leads to boys teasing us when Kachime isn't paying attention.
I'm not terrible but it's still embarrassing. Only girls who know they aren't going to be field shinobi or couldn't care less about grades do worse than me. Once I finally finish the cool down lap after running two kilometers, I drop to the grass and yawn.
"—hey, hey, wasn't she running while she was asleep?"
"She's still sleepy! What kind of girl is she?"
I find myself briefly unable to doze off. Two girl are walking past me, hands covering their mouths. Meaning... Rin's nowhere near. Yup, she's currently cheering on Obito who is the last of the boys.
I nod off while watching, but an intuition wakes me up from the dreamless nap expecting to still see Rin cheering.
It's break time. Kachime is going from student to student giving detailed analyses. There are relieved faces that Asuma and Kurenai (always together) make, some mock horror faces, but most are carefree. Every person is surrounded by another or two, to reminiscence over their scores. Even Rin cheers on the disappointed Obito.
I sit with my folded arms on my knees and white anemone flowers sprouting from the ground near my toes.
"Akemi?"
I have to tilt my head way back to see Kachime's face. He adjusts his glasses at the bridge and holds his lime-colored clipboard with grass stickers closer. "Um... I don't have previous results to compare to, however... you performed very average for the age of your peers. At your age, you are below average."
Huh.
That's not too surprising.
"Additionally..."
I drop my chin on my arms, thinking of scheduling in running practice in my already busy life.
"...you still haven't made any friends."
Woah...
Kachime is quieter now, looking away at Might Guy doing some enthusiastic exercising.
"You're similar to him. Though he's probably the exact opposite of you, if you're lonely, he could use a friend as well. You're both rather eccentric! Don't think I didn't see you run while sleeping today!"
I look back at Might Guy—urging the exhausted students around him for some elaborate post-exercise routine—with a drop of sweat trailing down the side of my head.
Me?
Friends with him?
Guy is such an incredible person—why should he be hindered by a hopeless sleepyhead like me?
Even though his first introduction wasn't the most flattering, I still respected that man. Might Guy's unwavering determination... his enviable perseverence... his willingness to sacrifice his life to stop a great evil just like his father...
If I'm friends with him... I'll definitely bring him down with me.
"On the surface, maybe..." I murmur , looking at the flowers around me. "But actually... I'd..."
Kachime doesn't respond for a bit. Lethargy pulls at my eyelids.
"You say that," Kachime says, " but that isn't true. The fire I acknowledged within Might Guy is the very same I saw within you. Maybe your fire isn't as bright or bold, but... a fire is a fire. If you two nurture that fire, I have no doubt you'll go very, very far. And the first step to nurturing those flames is through a bond. Nobody in this world can get far without bonds. Be it positive or negative. So... don't give up. Sometimes you have to take the first step."
Kachime smiles so kindly, just like that day at the entrance exam. Back then, he smile did nothing to assuage my fears.
Now...
Something indescribable forms within me. It chases away my lethargy and makes me impatient. Indescribable yet so familiar.
"Understand..." I say, nodding even, "Kachime-sensei..."
small steps chapter 5 | education
With fear, I slide open the door. Eyes look at me, mocking smiles subconsciously form.
Rin is still reading her medical textbook.
I sit next to her, already exhausted for the day. As I yawn, Rin taps my shoulder.
"I've been hearing things," she says. "Some people call you silly and airheaded. I told them to stop."
"Names don't bother me," I tell her.
Rin nods, a bit troubled. I don't let that finish our conversation... I refuse to let Rin return to her book with nothing solved. "...I haven't made a friend, though."
"Oh! Really? Do you need help?"
My heart is thudding. "So... apparently... I'm shy."
Rin snickers. "I could've told you that!"
"And... of all the people here... I would want to be your friend most of all. If you don't want to, that's fine."
"Oh... oh! Y-You mean... you want to be my friend?"
(Doesn't Rin sound kinda like me?)
Rin scratches her head. "I mean... I guess... I thought you understood that without my best friend, I'm kinda lonely. I mean, I'm always the odd one out in even groups, you know? So with you here, I haven't been struggling to fit in! B-But I thought... I didn't know you wanted to be my friend. You never really did anything..."
So she thought I was keeping her away, or something.
That's completely wrong.
Although my silence is mostly the fault of my shyness, I genuinely have no clue what a kid would talk about. I can understand adults and teenagers, at a lesser extent. But a kid's mind is the antithesis of my own.
Surely a kid wouldn't care about things such as morality, people watching, and the scientific reasoning behind chakra. Don't they talk about simple things like funny stories or play games?
(How could we misunderstand this badly?)
"I'm sorry... I'm new to this," I say. "If it helps... I'm really, really sheltered. You're the first person near my age I've talked to. So... the things you expect from normal people... is expecting a bit much from me."
"Ah, that makes so much sense! Mh-hm... so that's why you were always so close to me. I get it. But next time... it's okay to talk more. Not being alone is nice, but it's really awkward when the silence never ends..." Rin laughs.
(I thought it was peaceful. That's probably where the problem is.)
I try talking to Rin about anything I can think of until class starts. Rin obviously humors me. Come lunchtime and Rin is introducing me to:
"—the future Hokage, Obito Uchiha!"
(In real life, he's a bit loud, huh?)
I lower my head a little. "Akemi Minakura. Um... I'll be a ninja in the future... probably."
"Eh? Why are you doubting yourself? Are you that bad?"
"Obito, don't say things like that," Rin mildly scolds. "Akemi says she's good at weapons, right?"
I nod more towards Rin than to Obito.
"That's it?" Obito doesn't seem too impressed. "Well, I'm from the Uchiha Clan! I've got Fire Release and Sharingan, you know! I'll be super strong one day!"
"Ah," I say, "you will."
(Oh, I did not think that.)
Obito blinks, mouth agape. Before long, his grins returns, brighter than before. "Y-Yeah! Exactly! See, she gets it!"
Rin laughs. "I'm glad you two are getting along! Obito was really worried about you. He said you two probably wouldn't!"
"W-Well, that's history, Rin," Obito interrupts. "So... do you really sleep that much?"
Obito hangs out in the classroom while Rin and I go to the Kunoichi Class. At the end of the day, as we walk the fenced off path to go home—I behind Rin and Obito—I steel myself and say, "Hey... er... let's hang out after school together... someday..."
That sounded a lot better in my head.
Rin and Obito trade a look.
"That's sounds like fun," Rin smiles. "Let's all hang out one day! As best friends!"
small steps chapter 5 | education
Actually, from February 10 to May 19, Akemi is 2 years older than Obito. For the rest of the year, she's three. It's the case for a few others, so it's more accurate to say she almost 3 years older than her classmates. The age counter is put there to address future awkward birthdays and ages to fit timeline as close as possible. For example, if Obito is 12 years and 10 months, his age of death will be rounded up as 13 years though official records will have 12 years.