VIII.

"Paul..." breathed Gwen, eyes wide open.

The young man was covered in mud and he seemed like he had been wandering in the forest for days.

He walked torward her and without saying anything, he took her in his arms.

Then, he receded a little and looked at everyone.

"You finally figured it out..."

"Yes." she smiled, receding from her friend. "And you were right Paul, I don't know how to thank you, you put so much at stake to help us and I know-"

"You don't know a thing." cut her sadly the young man, "Nothing at all."

"What was it to know? " asked then Arthur and he couldn't prevent the wariness in his voice because he still thought the man was looking at his Guinevere in a way he wasn't sure he liked.

Gwen looked at him for a few seconds, puzzled.

And then looked back at Paul,

"You're right, but you'll have time to explain. Come back with us at Camelot."

"What?" exclaimed both Merlin and Arthur,

Gwen ignored them and said again, taking Paul's hands in hers.

Okay, Arthur officially didn't like him.

"I beg you. You tried do warn me, you tried and I was too stupid to listen to you and I am... I am so sorry!"

Paul sadly smiled and was ready to take her in her arms again when he met the icy stare of the golden haired man on the horse behind her daring him to touch her again.

Arthur, if he remembered well.

"You only have three horses."

"You can take mine."

"Guinevere," Gwen jumped, she hadn't even noticed that Arthur had dismounted off of his horse to join her, "And how will you travel? On your dog?" He then held a hand to Paul, "Arthur Pendragon."

Paul's eyes widened.

"The King?"

"Himself."

A silence.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

Arthur sighed.

"It's a long story."

"I guess so."

Gwen noticed Arthur's protective hand on her back and almost rolled her eyes before she froze.

What if he didn't trust her anymore?

What if it was their life from now on?

"So, Guinevere? How are you planning on joining Camelot?" smirked Arthur, raising an eyebrow.

She blushed.

And rambled.

But didn't make any sense at all.

"You're gonna have to use words, my love." he breathed tenderly and she cleared her throat.

"I was thinking... maybe I could... you know... ride... with you." she ended shyly.

Arthur buried his eyes in hers and again, she would have sworn his eyes were darker.

Arthur didn't know if it was a good idea.

He would literally give anything to ride with her, but having her body against his for a whole day...

He was not sure he could control himself.

Not when he had been deprived of her for so long.

"Arthur, if this is too soon-"

"Of course I want to." he answered in a tender voice,

She blushed again before looking down.

Paul's eyes were coming and going between the two of them and Merlin saw the sad smile on his lips and reminded himself asking him later the reason why.

Morgana felt a pain in her head when she woke up her and she opened her eyes.

At first, she couldn't see anything about where she was but when she tried to rubb her eyes to see clear, she felt something restraining her wrist and a whimper of fear took her.

No.

Not again.

She was powerful now.

She couldn't be trapped again.

"Trying to get away is useless."

Morgana jumped and turned around quickly toward the voice before she said with a voice she would have loved more valiant,

"What did you do to me?"

"Oh so little..." the shadow got up and got closer.

Morgana noticed she had taken her former form again and she felt sick.

She was betrayed.

Again.

Was it her destiny?

Why couldn't people be loyal to her?

Arthur had Merlin and Gwen, against all odds.

No matter what happened and no matter what he did.

He was never alone.

She was.

Why was she always alone?

"Why did you do that? I'm on your side!"

Morgaine laughed and Morgana felt frozen in the bottom of herself.

"You are not on my side. You killed Morgause."

"And do you really believe I wanted to do that? Do you really believe I didn't beg her not to make me do this? She was my sister."

Again, Morgaine shouted and her eyes went gold while a scream of pain escaped Morgana's lips and she felt a warm liquid on her cheek.

"You're wrong about me, you idiot!"

"Oh worry not. Pendragon will pay. I will bring him here and then I will kill you both. And Morgause's death will finally be avenged."

They were all three gone again.

Paul was on Gwen's horse, Merlin on his and Gwen with Arthur.

Trouble was happily strolling behind them.

Gwen leant on Arthur and felt his warm and hard body against hers.

Her King.

"You can sleep you know." he whispered in her ear, "I've got you."

She tenderly smiled at this,

"I don't want to be a burden for you."

"Guinevere," he smiled, "You could never be a burden to me."

She leant a little more and closed her eyes, letting his smell soak in her.

His smell, so... masculine.

And she had not slept in so long…

If she just closed her eyes...

"Can I tell you something?"

He hummed and she smiled, eyes still closed.

"You are quite comfy for someone so well built, you know." she blushed and tensed in front of what her mouth told but then and he laughed cheerfully and she relaxed,

"I am glad to know that." then his voice went tender. "I already told you Guinevere, I am yours to enjoy for as long as you want.."

She noticed the hope in his voice and turned slightly the head so she could see him, his eyes laid on her her and they were shinning with such love and apprehension.

How could he do that?

How could he forgive her?

She wanted nothing more than saying yes to his implicit question, but she needed time.

Time to forgive herself.

Because if Arthur had, it was going to take a little more time for her, trust herself again.

She knew she loved Arthur, she would do anything for him to be happy, and if he wanted her then she would be here, but it would take some time before things could go back to the way they were...

"I just need some time, Arthur." she breathed and regretted it right away.

Because she saw a flash of rejection cross his blue eyes and he looked straight in front of him trying to control his breathing, but to where she was cuddled against his chest, she felt his heart beating so fast.

"Arthur-" she breathed,

"I'm tired." he whispered, looking slightly behind him to find Merlin and Paul, discussing. "We'll take a short break."

"Arthur," she said again, helpless.

"It's fine Guinevere, you don't have to explain. I got it."

But she didn't think he did.

He then stopped the horse, dismounted off of it and helped Gwen dismounted too, his hands tenderly on her waist.

He stared at her a few seconds then slightly smiled before walking away.

How was it that all she was able to do lately was hurting him.

Morgaine was sat at her table, she needed to think.

She had to find a way to get in Camelot.

First, she had to find a way to separate Arthur from this stupid servant of his who always was with him.

Not that he was a threat but for now it was useless to make others victims.

For now.

She then remembered a talk with Morgana, a few days before...

"Do you know Emrys?"

"I beg your pardon?"

Morgana sneered,

"Don't look so surprised. I know you're his ally."

"But what on earth are you talking about?""

The surprise must be so obvious in her face that Morgana stopped right away,

"Don't you know who he is?"

"I swear I don't."

Morgana's eyes narrowed for a few seconds before she sighed,

"My destiny and my doom..."

"Sorry?"

"Emrys is the one who failed each of my plans for as long as I can remember."

"Who is he?"

"I don't know." breathed Morgana with anger, "Someone close to Arthur, that's for sure."

Morgaine narrowed her eyes and got up.

She took a stair, opened a door and went down toward a cellar which she opened and found Morgana, sat on the floor the tray before her intact.

"Did you not eat?"

"I'm not doing you this pleasure."

"It's not poisoned, if it's what you mean, I have others plans for you..."

She saw the flash of fear crossed Morgana's green eyes but it disappeared as soon as it came.

"I'm not afraid of death."

"I know."

A slightly silence came between the two before Morgaine said,

"I want to know who Emrys is."

Gwen was sat with Trouble asleep on her foot, she stared at Arthur from where she was in front of the fire.

He didn't speak, simply staring at the heat, playing with a piece of wood.

And she knew that look.

It was the look he had had years ago when he came to rescue her and Lancelot at Hengist.

Merlin and Paul, feeling the tense atmosphere kept on talking to maintain a bit of normality.

"Where are you from Paul?"

"A small village, on Nemeth's borders."

"So far?" Merlin said, surprised. "But, what are you doing here then?"

He saw the young's man eyes become sad,

"It belongs to a story I attend to tell you once we arrive. A long story."

Merlin and Gwen nodded and Arthur suddenly got up, walking away from the rest of the group, to walk in the forest thoughtful.

Gwen hesitated, watching him leave, and then she met Merlin's stare and he nodded at her to follow him.

The young woman then got up and almost ran to catch the King.

"She really loves him, doesn't she?"asked Paul,

"Yes. And she means the world to him."

Paul nodded and looked down again,

"There was a woman, wasn't it?"

"There is a woman." only answered Paul.

Arthur walked away because he needed to think.

Put things clear in his head.

Why would Gwen need time for?

He forgave her.

He wanted her.

And now what?

She wanted time apart?

He shook his head

At this moment, he felt her behind him but he didn't stopped.

"Arthur..." she called him and he felt a hand slipped in his, he didn't prevent it and did nothing to break free.

It felt so right having her hand in his.

It just felt so right being with her, protect her, cherish her, marry her!

Why wasn't she feeling the same?

He knew she loved him.

He didn't doubt it anymore.

So maybe her feelings wasn't the issue...

His were.

And the strength of them had frightened her.

It could.

Sometimes, it frightened him.

There wasn't a thing on Earth he would not do for her.

"Arthur," she slowly said, making him leave his thoughts. They kept on walking, her hand on his, their hearts beating in a same beat. "You know I love you."

"I know." he breathed,

"But..." he closed his eyes a few seconds, not sure he could handle what was going to happen,"I need time."

Here it was again, her wanting time.

She had said it and Arthur felt his heart stop.

Time? What for?

What would she want time apart from him when all he wanted was spending all of his time with her?

Gwen understood what was upsetting him and said right away,

"Time to forgive myself, Arthur."

He stopped and buried his bright blue eyes in her chocolate's ones.

"Forgive yourself?"

"Do you think... " she looked away, trying to chase tears that she felt pricked at her eyes, "Do you think it's easy for me, leaving with the idea I cheated on you? You, the man I love more than anything? Because after all, I did kiss him even if we were not together anymore.."

In front of the sadness of her look, Arthur would have wanted to be able to comfort her totally.

But truth be told, he didn't really want to think about the fact that she did kiss Lancelot.

He had truly thought this chapter of their life was over.

Had not given it a single thought since his return.

He should have realized she would be torn...

"I forgave you Guinevere. You must have had a reason for..."

"A reason?" she said with a laugh without humor, "I have no excuses! We were about to get married Arthur! If I hadn't been so stupid, we would be husband and wife by now."

Tears pricked at his eyes too.

"I know..." was all he could manage to say. The wound still too fresh to put it into words. "Maybe... Maybe it was my fault after all..."

"Your fault? No Arthur it-"

"I should have known Lancelot here would upset you."

"But it didn't! Not at first..."

"I should have seen marrying me in front of him would be complicated."

"No, please don't-"

"Maybe I am not enough for you or I'm not making you happy and-"

"Shh" she cut him off, letting go of his hand for laying it on his cheeks, stroking it tenderly, "Listen to me, I love you. You make me so happy Arthur, I swear it. And you are more than enough for me."

And then it fell on him.

Maybe what they needed to do was talk about it.

Even if neither of them wanted to.

And God if he didn't want to.

But he would.

For her.

So he took a deep breath and tried to keep an open heart and mind.

"Then what happened?"he whispered and she understood their talk slightly changed,

She was grateful of him to try and talk it out.

That proved how much he loved her, how much he wanted this to work.

And so did she.

Even if talking about it would break her heart and her self-esteem all over again.

For him?

She would do anything.

"I don't know... I can't understand why but each time I saw him, I couldn't prevent the images in my head, nor the desire of being with him or kiss-"

She stopped when she felt a tear rolling down her finger, she looked up and saw Arthur, with that same look he had when she first told him the truth.

"Gwen, listen to me." he murmured "These couple of days before our wedding, I could only think about you..." he whispered with a broken voice."And of our life together, the fact that I would be able to hold you in my arms forever… What our children may look like." he looked down before burying his eyes in hers, "Maybe there is a reason to all this Guinevere. And believe me this is breaking my heart to admit it, but maybe your heart was trying to make you understand that you were making a mistake, that you were choosing the wrong man..."

She saw it killed him to say that.

And he receded a little, against the heart but she walked toward him, she didn't want to let him go.

"No-"

"I forgive you Guinevere, you know I do. With all my heart. There is nothing in the whole world I want more in Earth than you and me, together, forever. But... if it's not what you want, if you don't know what you want anymore," he took a deep shaky breath. "I would understand, I… I would let you time to decide." he closed his eyes, "I love you. I want you to be happy. With or without...me."

Fresh tears rolled down her face and Gwen realized how their love was true.

A few days ago, she was the one ready to sacrifice her happiness for him to be happy with someone else.

And now, he was standing there, telling her that no matter how much it would hurt him, if she was in love with another man, he would let her go.

She walked forward again, and hugged him tightly, burying her face in his neck.

"Oh Arthur..." she breathed and she felt his arms tighten around her waist. "My heart wasn't wrong." she whispered in his ear and he shivered,"I know who I want. And it's hard to understand for me. I only ever loved you so why, the night before our wedding, it would have been any different?"

He didn't answer but held her closer to him.

If this had to be the last time he held her in his arms, he wanted to remember it.

She receded too quickly for his taste, and his heart started to beat a hundred miles and hour, his arms refusing to let her go.

He had to find something to say or do for her not leave him.

Not again.

And he'd rather not think about a life where she would chose Lancelot over him and he would have to see her live the life he had imagined with her, with someone else.

With him, of all people.

But for her, he would try.

It would kill him,

But he would try.

But it would break his heart so entirely.

Especially now that he had believed that all was back to normal, and that perhaps, oh perhaps, she still loved him and...

His thoughts were cut by Gwen's lips on his.

The young woman kissed him passionately and her hands grabbed themselves behind his neck while he responded to her kiss, bringing her to him a little more.

When the need for air came up, they had to separate and with ragged breaths, his blue eyes bored in her warm chocolates.

"I want you Arthur. I'm sure of it. I just need time to forgive myself, but I don't want to be away from you. I can't anymore."

A small smile lit up the King's gorgeous face while he laid his forehead on hers, and whispered, in a barely audible voice,

"I love you so much..."

"What do you want from me?" said Morgana again,"I already told you, I have no ideas who Emrys is."

"You're lying." said calmly Morgaine,

The young witch burst out of laughter,

"I'm lying, huh?" before she said, with an angry voice, "Do you really think I would have all this nightmares if I knew who Emrys is? Are you really as stupid as you look?"

Morgaine got closer and met her stare,

"Don't you dare talk to me like that."

"And what are you going to do? Kill me? It's already on your list anyway."

On these words, she nonchalantly took a piece of bread laid on the tray in front of her.

Morgaine kicked the tray, but Morgana stood still.

She didn't move.

Then she left, slamming the door behind her and Morgana sighed.

She looked at the handcuffs and resumed what she was doing before Morgaine came.

She knew this was what altered her magic, but she also knew she was more powerful than that.

So, for what seems to her like the hundred times, she closed her eyes, and said the same spell again, until she passed out from exhaustion, exhausted by the energy it demanded.

Passing out, Morgana didn't notice the slight spark on her left handcuffs...

Once back with the others, Arthur, Gwen, Merlin and Paul resumed their road.

On the leader horse at the back of the file, the atmosphere was clearly warmer.

Arthur and Guinevere were on the back, hidden from view from the others – or so they thought...

Arthur, who was holding the reins, had the arms tighten around Gwen and from time to time, he hugged her a little more tight and she felt his heartbeat, same as hers.

On her side, Gwen was nestled against Arthur, the head in the crook of his shoulder and by moments, she would slightly turned her head and lay a small kiss on his neck, making him shiver with pleasure and bit his bottom lip, which drove her crazy and she kissed his jaw. Then, Arthur, couldn't take it anymore, turned his head a few seconds and kissed her hard before focusing on the road again.

"God, take a room." grunted Merlin when it happened for the fourth time.

Paul laughed merrily at this, and Merlin smiled.

Even if he was groaning , he was glad to see his friends finally reunited.

It was as if nothing could tore them apart now, they were strong.

Invincible.

'Love is the most powerful magic' had once said Kilgarrah.

Thinking about his old friend, Merlin made a mental note to remind himself to ask him about the Sophia/Morgaine thing.

"Are we soon in Camelot? " asked then Paul,

Gwen, who was having fun with Arthur's neck again, looked up at him and met his ocean eyes stared at her with... desire.

Such desire she felt suddenly like she could melt.

"Clotpole?"

Arthur jumped and glared at Merlin before he looked at Paul and smiled, nodding a bit ahead of them.

"Paul, welcome to Camelot."

The young man then looked in front of him and caught glimpse of a wonderful castle, nestled against the trees.

"Camelot..." he whispered, didn't believing his eyes.