Jon's lungs were on fire. His eyes shot open with a gasp. His limbs felt heavy and it took him a moment to get himself functioning properly. Slowly he sat up, his back sore from laying on the table...table? Wasn't Jon in his bed? Wasn't it all just a bad dream? He looked down and saw the scars on his body, along with a necklace. The dire wolf pendant he had made all those years ago. But how did it end up here?
Jon picked it up and looked it over, he moved to fiddle with his ring as he thought about all of this, but it was gone. No doubt one of his men took it from him after they...Jon cringed at the memory. It was then that the door opened, to revel Ser Davos and Melisandre, the red woman.
"You're alive," Davos says with wide eyes, him and the woman walking over to Jon.
"It seems so" Jon replies, glancing at the necklace and scars.
"Your woman will be pleased to hear it," Davos tells him with a smile. Jon only looks at him with confusion in his eyes.
"My woman?" he asked, not quite sure what Davos could mean.
"The silver-haired woman with purple eyes" Davos explains. It takes Jon a second to realize who he's referring to.
"That's impossible, she's dead," Jon says quickly, brushing off the idea before it can even fully form.
"No, she's quite alive, unless we all saw the same ghost. Which she was a bit of a ghost after having seen you. You would have thought she died with you" Davos rambles, reflecting on his encounter with the strange woman.
"She was here? For how long? When did she leave?" Jon asks, immediately looking around the room for things he might need on his journey.
"Days ago, and no one is really sure how she got here or how she left. They saw no horse and she wasn't wearing shoes. Her only traveling companion was the dire wolf" Davos says gesturing towards the other white wolf in the room.
Jon looked to the other side of the room and sure enough, saw Winter and Ghost sitting on the floor intertwined with one another.
"She took your ring with her, the one that matches her own, when she left" Davos continues as Jon grips the pendant around his neck.
"It was her who brought you back," Melisandre says, stepping towards Jon with amazement in her eyes.
"What do you mean she brought me back?"
"I used her hair and yours, along with your blood mixed together. Your bond is undeniable and I believe the Lord of Light saw that and brought you back to her" she says with absolute certainty in her voice.
"Well whatever it is, you're back now," Davos says with an attempt at a hopeful smile, placing a reaffirming hand on Jon's shoulder.
"Could anyone tell which direction she was heading in?" Jon asked, glancing over at the wolves. Would he have the same reunion with Rhaella as the wolves had with one another?
"Are you thinking about going after her?" Davos asked with a worried smile.
"Can we have this discussion after I get dressed?" Jon asked, feeling the anger start to rise in his chest.
"Of course" Davos replied, him and the red woman exiting his chambers. It was only Jon and the wolves. That's when it hit him most. She was here, she was here and she slipped right through his fingertips. It made him angry to think about.
That anger stayed with Jon as he dressed, and went out to arrest the men who had done this to him. Later in the day, they were all lined up with ropes around their necks, waiting for Jon to deliver the sentence.
"It's not right what you did! Bringing Wildings beyond the wall!" Ser Allister said with venom in his voice.
"Neither was killing me"
Jon unsheathed his sword and walked forward to cut the rope. Their last words offered no remorse, which Jon was thankful for because he would have let them live. If they were even the least bit sorry, Jon would have let them go. He hated that they did this to him, that they were making him do this.
But in some ways, he had them to thank. If they didn't do what they did she would never have come. He would never have known that she was alive and now she was here. Now he could leave and go find her. He would hold her again, feel her lips and her heart beating against his chest. But that didn't matter now. Jon shook off his moment of hesitation and swung his sword, cutting the rope in two. There was anger with the swing. Anger at not being able to be the leaser Commander Mormont thought he was. Anger that he took so damn long to wake up. That she was here, that she was within reach, and gone all over again. If only he could have seen her or felt her touch instead of the ghost of it. Now, he only had reminders of her presence, Winter and the dire wolf necklace. Which he wore tucked under his shirt. If only he could tell her he was alive, her emotions made her reckless as far as he could remember and there was no telling what she would do. His only clue was mumbling Davos overheard her say.
"Vengence for the family", but what could that mean? She only threatened the Men of the Nights Watch, a spectacle to behold, Davos commented. Would she go to King's Landing for Ned and the girls? The twin towers for Robb and Catelyn? The Iron Islands for Bran and Rickon? There was no way of knowing where she would go, or what vengeance she knew of that needed to be pursued. But he would find her.
He put his sword back in place and took off his cloak, handing it to Ed. Ed looked at him in shock and confusion.
"What am I supposed to do with this?" he asked.
"Wear it, burn it, I don't care anymore" Jon grumbled, walking out of the courtyard.
"My watch has ended" Jon mumbles, walking back to his chambers to begin packing. He had a long ride ahead of him, and he had no idea where he would go first, but he had to try.
Ed walked into his chambers as he was finishing up his packing. There wasn't much to take, he had very few items of his own. The one of true significance to him was on the finger of her.
"What are you doing Jon?" Ed asked.
"I'm leaving"
"You gave a vow, Jon"
"Aye, I did. And I gave my life as my vow required. As far as I'm concerned I'm no longer bound to the men of the Night's Watch" Jon grumbled.
"Jon,"
"No Ed, I tried to do right by Mormont. I did what I thought was right and I got a knife to the heart for it" Jon snapped at Ed. Ed stayed silent, he couldn't force Jon to stay.
"Where will you go?" he asks softly. Jon remained quiet.
"Are you gonna go after her? The white-haired woman?" he presses.
"She has a name"
"And why should I know it? You've never mentioned her before, not to me or to Pip"
"What was there to tell?!" Jon snaps, abruptly turning around to face Ed.
"That you loved her, that the ring on your finger didn't belong to your mother but bound you to that woman. That you had a child with her. There was a lot you could have said, Jon. You chose to keep quiet about her, why?" Ed asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Keeping calm despite Jon's quick temper.
"Because...I didn't want to bring life to the ghost I saw every day. It wasn't like there was anything I could do. I couldn't help her, or save her. I failed her, and it wasn't something I wanted to admit" Jon answered with a heavy sigh.
"That night, when you got word about your father...you weren't leaving to go to your brother were you?" Ed asked, a look of realization on his face.
"I wanted to go to her. I had heard she was with child...my child. And knowin she was all alone in King's Landing, with no one to protect her or the babe. I thought that maybe I could get to her, that I would save her and we could have a life together. Even if I would be a deserter and despite her being called a traitor for it"
"I'm sorry, that you couldn't have stayed with her" Ed said, which caused Jon to give him a confused look.
"Sam may have mentioned a girl who couldn't handle the cold," Ed said with a smile. Jon gave a half smile in return. Of course, Sam would tell them, he couldn't keep a secret to save his life.
"Looks like she can handle the cold now though since she came here without shoes" Ed mumbled with a chuckle. Jon's smile grew a little and he couldn't help but give a chuckle in return.
"You know why her hair is white then?" Jon asked.
"A mark of the Targaryens, who could forget?"
Their conversation was interrupted by the sound of the bell. The sound that meant someone was coming through the gate. Jon's heart leaped in his chest. Did she come back?
Jon and Ed walked out of his quarters to see who had come through. It was people on horses, and riding amongst them was Sansa.
Jon was shocked and overjoyed at seeing his sister. And the look on her face said she thought the same about him. Jon quickly ran off the platform as Sansa moved to get off her horse. Neither spoke as they engulfed one another in a hug. Jon held her tightly while she just relished in the nearness of him. Although she never said it, Jon was her brother, as much a brother to her as Robb and Bran and Rickon.
Once the horses were put away and the small party of riders settled into their chambers it was nightfall. Both Starks had so many questions to ask the other but decided to wait until morning.
I didn't want to be back here. So soon after seeing his lifeless form lying on the table and the gods were tormenting me with another dream?
We were in the field of snow. I was sitting in my patch of burnt grass with my red silk dress spread out around me. But there were tears it in. I slowly reached my hand up to my left cheek and felt the cut Ramsy had left me earlier today. Even in my dreams, I couldn't escape the bruises or cuts he left me. Even my red dress was torn and frayed in places. The gods wanted to punish me, by not allowing me to escape Ramsy in my dreams and by seeing Jon, to be reminded of my failure.
But this wasn't the Jon I normally saw in my head. This wasn't the younger Jon from the past who normally visited me. And it wasn't an older Jon from the future, who I saw as a teenager. No...this was the same man I left back at Castle Black.
"Why are you here?" I shouted to him as he walked closer to me.
"Emylea?" he asked, confusion overtaking his features. I felt the tears well up in my eyes at the sound of his voice and that name.
"I haven't heard that name in a long time" I mumble, trying my best to keep my voice even.
"Are you here to mock me?" I ask, trying my best not to choke up from the pain in my throat.
"Mock you? Why would I..." then a realization come over his face and he slowly sat down next to me.
"What happened to you?" he asks, looking me over with pain in his eyes. I let out a little laugh as a few more tears roll down my cheeks.
"What didn't happen?" I reply. I try my best not to look at him. To not look into his chocolate eyes, but I do. He seems almost terrified when he looks at me. Like he has words to tell me but he can't, or doesn't know how.
"I miss you Jon" I cry, trying to move closer to him, but I was confined to my grass as he was confined to his snow. I see tears start to form in the corners of his eyes as well.
"I know, I miss you too" he answers, his eyes continuing to roam over me. I felt he was drinking me in like a fine wine. But was it for the last time? As much as I hated his haunting me I couldn't live without it.
"I hope I'll see you soon, you and our daughter" I mumbled, but he stayed silent.
"I'll try to stay alive because I know you would want me to. But I can't guarantee it. I don't know what he'll do to me next...or how much longer I'll be able to endure it but I promise to try. For you" I continue, the words falling out of my mouth in a jumble.
"I would take your place. I would take all this pain from you and put it on myself if I could" he says, trying his best to get to me, to touch me.
"I know you would" I answer, not having the strength to say more.
But all too suddenly I was ripped away from him and the dream. I awoke with a start on the Lord's chamber floor. My ankles still chained to bed posts. I was shivering uncontrollably. Ramsy had me dressed in the thinnest silk he could find.
After finding out about the heat I could bring to the surface of my skin, Ramsay made it his personal mission to keep me weak and cold. Which meant cold water being dumped over me whenever my clothes were dry. No fire. An open window. Along with his nightly visits which would leave me weaker and in more pain than the night before. I was tired, cold, weak, and starving. I barely slept and when I did it was always brief. My limbs were sore from sleeping on stones and my leg hurt even more because of the break in it. The break he made when he captured me.
I sat up on the cold stone, trying to summon my heat, but it was flicker and did nothing to warm me up.
"Emylea" a voice whispered from behind me. My body winced with fear, thinking it was Ramsay. I slowly turned around and held a scream in my throat.
There, standing before me plain as day, was Robb Stark.
"R-Robb?" I stuttered, the chains clinking together as I moved.
"Well who else would it be?" he chuckled, crouching down to eye level with me. He looked older than when I last saw him. He had a small beard and his curls were longer now. His face seemed a bit harder than the man I knew before. But I suppose war does that to a person.
"I must be going mad" I mumble, quickly rubbing my eyes with my hands and keeping them there. It must have been sleep deprivation or the lack of food. Robb Stark was dead, and there was no way I could be talking to his ghost. But I felt his hands take my hands and lower them so I was forced to look at him. I still winced at his touch.
"You aren't going mad," he says softly, smiling at me. I feel tears well in my eyes as he continues to stare at me. He moves his hand up and wipes away a few of my tears with his thumb.
"Why are you crying?" he asks calmly.
"I'm sorry I told you I was dead. I'm sorry I never came back and I'm sorry...that I wasn't there when..." I couldn't finish that sentence. My voice caught in my throat as I tried to shake the thought from my mind.
"Hush now. It's alright. My fate was decided the moment I chose to leave Winterfell, no one could have changed it. Not even you" he tells me with a smile, lowering his hand from my cheek.
"Then why are you here? If not to blame me for your death?" I ask, still feeling very confused by all of this.
"I'm here to tell you that you're going to be okay," he says, which only brings more tears to my eyes.
"I'll never be okay. Not after what he's done to me, and not after losing him" I state, letting the tears freely fall down my cheeks. He gives me a knowing smile and rises back to his feet.
"You're going to be okay. I can promise you that" he says, taking steps backward until he fades into smoke.
Jon took his seat at the breakfast table across from his sister. They exchanged smiles as he did so. Neither one wasn't quite sure who should speak first, or what should be said first. But Sansa being Sansa started the conversation first.
"I'm so sorry, about Rhaella and the child" she began. She knew it was his child after she took some time to think about it. After she had grown away from the silly girl she once was.
"She's alive," Jon says as he takes a drink of ale.
"What?"
"She's alive. She came here not too long ago after I was...injured" Jon said, deciding it was best not to tell his sister about his dabbling with death.
"She was here...well, where did she go? Why would she leave you?" Sansa asked, trying to wrap her mind around the idea that her sister might actually be alive.
"She thought I was dead when she saw me. The only thing we know is that she said she would get vengeance for the family" Jon explained.
"I wonder what that could mean" Sansa mumbled, trying to piece the puzzle together herself. Jon continued on with his breakfast, a memory of breakfasts at Winterfell flashing into his mind.
"We need to take back Winterfell" Sansa stated, making Jon almost choke on his food. She had told him earlier that morning about Ramsay Bolton and what a monster he was.
"I'm done fighting Sansa. That's all I've done for 5 years. She's here and alive. I'm going to go find her"
"The Northmen will rally to our sides and-"
"Sorry to interrupt, but this came for you in the night," Davos said, walking over to Jon and handing him a scroll. Jon took it hesitantly and unraveled it. When he did, a lock of silver-white hair fell out onto the table. The whole table went silent as everyone looked at the lock of hair. Slowly Jon began to read the scroll.
"To the traitor and bastard Jon Snow,
You allowed thousands of wildlings past the Wall. You have betrayed your own kinda and you have betrayed the North. Winterfell is mine, bastard, come and see.
Your woman is locked up here in my chambers and is keeping my bed warm at night. Shivering violently on the floor, come and see.
Your brother Rickon is in my dungeon. His direwolf's skin is on my floor come and see. I want my bride back. Send her to me, bastard, and I will not trouble you or your wildling lovers. I might even send you back your woman. Keep her from me and I will ride North to slaughter every wildling man, woman, and babe living under your protection. You will watch as I skin them living. You will watch as my soldiers take turns raping your woman and sister. You will watch as my dogs devour your wild little brother. Then I will spoon your eyes from their sockets and let my dogs do the rest. Come and see.
Ramsay Bolton, Lord of Winterfell and Warden of the North"
Jon could feel his heart stop in some places as he read the scroll. He had Rickon and he had her. He had no idea how Ramsay found out about him and Rhaella but he knew. And the lock of hair he sent was proof to show him.
Sansa took the letter out of his hands when he stopped reading halfway through and read the rest of it.
"We have to take it back. He has our brother, he has Rhaella!" Sansa said, trying to best to keep her emotions under control.
"We have no army"
"We could raise one. They would rally behind us"
"You could ask the wildlings to fight alongside you," Davos told him.
"He's right. They would fight for you. You brought them here, you owe them your lives" Tormund told Jon as he took a big bite out of the ham on his plate. Jon clenched his fists. He was being pulled out of one fight and into another. But Jon would do it for her. He would kill Ramsay for what he's done. For what he's done to Sansa and to her. He would pay.
"We leave tomorrow"