Miles to Go Before I Sleep

by ErgoMaria

Seven years ago Meetra Surik saved the Republic and lost a piece of herself. Six years ago Revan died and Meetra's soul died with him. Three years ago Revan was reborn. Meetra wasn't. Now Revan is missing and Meetra has been dragged back to life. But is she ready? Can Revan face a past he can't remember? (KOTOR AU - Meetra/Atton, MRevan/Carth) (Sequel to No Light without Shadows)

8. Chapter 07 - Korriban

CHAPTER 07 - KORRIBAN

Now (3953)

"I don't know what I expected, but this… isn't it. I suppose I thought that Korriban would be dark, surrounded by shadows and lurking terror. But it's really just barren. Empty. In a way, it almost feels sad." Meetra sighed softly as she strolled between the towering tombs in the Valley of the Sleeping Kings, the harsh winds loosening her hair from its braid.

Kreia merely tutted. 'Korriban is a dead world full of graveyards and relics of the past. The Sith abandoned it long ago and there is little left for the living.'

"Then why do new Sith keep coming to this planet?" Pausing in front of the final resting place of Ajunta Pall, Meetra frowned. She was currently the only member of the crew who was wandering the valley, the others still gathered around the ship as they discussed the best place to begin searching for either Nihilus or Master Vash. "Bastila told me that Alek er, Malak, built an academy here to train a new generation of dark Force users. And the Handmaiden says that this is the only place Nihilus calls home."

'It is because these new Sith have yet to learn the lessons of those who came before. They do not realize that the future cannot be built upon the decaying remains of what has already come and gone.'

A flicker of hope alighted in Meetra. "So, does that mean the past Sith failed at whatever plans they had?"

'I never said that, child.'

"Then why are they no longer here?"

'Hmm… Perhaps that is a question you must discover your own answers to."

If she had been with the rest of the crew, Meetra would have been satisfied with the cryptic response and ended their conversation. But she was currently alone with her mentor, everyone else too far away to overhear what was said. That privacy was empowering. "Kreia… How do you know so much about the Sith?"

There was a long pause before the older woman remarked, 'You still word your questions like a Jedi, wrapping your truth in politeness rather than speaking plainly. If you are asking if I am a Sith or a Jedi then you will find no answer here, at least none that will satisfy your curiosity. Sith and Jedi are merely words, like dark and light, Consular or Revanchist.'

"But Kreia…"

'Hush now. You are approaching the ruins of history and you still have many lessons yet to learn.' The older woman's voice grew harsher as she ordered,'Do not dwell upon what will bring you no comfort.'

Atton arched a brow as he approached, prodding the Handmaiden in front of him as Bao-Dur walked behind, trailed by Visas. "Uh, who were you talking to?"

"Kreia."

"I forgot that you have some type of connection with that old hag." Shuddering, Atton glanced back at the Hawk. "The fact that she can give you 'advice' even when she's still on the ship is just creepy."

"She said that she would be more useful to us staying behind." Meetra shrugged. "I trust her."

"Funny, Bastila had almost the same excuse for not trekking across this hellscape."

Meetra frowned. "She's not coming with us?"

"What she said is that she's technically never been to Korriban, so she doesn't think she'll be much help." Chucking a little, Bao-Dur added, "Also, it seems that the last time she went on a trip with a former Revanchist it wasn't uncommon for some… complications to arise. She offered to stay on the ship in case we need any assistance later."

"She does have a direct line to an entire Republic base, so it could be helpful." Mostly unperturbed by the younger woman's decision, Meetra nodded to the others. "I guess it's just the five of us. So, where are we headed?"

There was a brief, nervous pause before Atton made a vague gesture to a path beyond the valley. "Malak's old academy."

Likely mistaking Meetra's sudden tension for confusion, the Handmaiden clarified, "It is one of the few places on this planet that my master will not view as sacred, and also one of the only locations outside of Dreshdae where a Jedi might be able to survive for any length of time. It will be good to locate another potential ally before we confront Lord Nihilus."

"I only met her a few times, but Master Vash always preferred to handle problems directly. It wouldn't surprise me if she specifically came to Korriban looking for answers about the Jedi deaths and disappearances. She's a Sentinel after all, which means that she was trained to be resourceful. If I were her, I'd establish a secure base near my search perimeter…"

"Stop doing that." Frowning at Atton, Meetra shook her head as she began walking towards the valley's exit.

"Doing what?"

"Reminding me that you're a Jedi. Were a Jedi. Whatever it is that you are now."

Abandoning their prisoner as he rushed to catch up, Atton called, "Look, I'm sorry. Do you want me to go back to pretending that I'm just some spacer?"

"No!" Meetra stared straight ahead as she walked. "I don't want you to lie to me anymore. Just because I don't like the truth doesn't mean that a lie is better."

"Then what do you want me to say?" There was a hint of exasperation in Atton's voice.

"Nothing! You don't have to talk! Just be quiet."

"Is your crew always this contentious?" The Handmaiden glanced between Bao-Dur and Visas for confirmation.

The Miraluka's expression remained impassive. "This problem is recent. I would accuse you of sowing distrust among them, Sith, but the truth is that this issue arose before your attempt on Meetra's life."

"It's love, isn't it?" When she received no response, the Handmaiden explained, "I see the way they move in and out of each other's space, like a dance… or a duel. My master told me that love is a powerful emotion but that we should be wary of it, as it can cause us to make foolish decisions."

Glaring over his shoulder, Atton snapped, "You know that I can hear you, right?"

"Just keep walking." Ducking her head against the harsh wind, Meetra raised her voice above the howling gusts. "If we're going to investigate that academy we need daylight to do it."

The journey between the Valley of the Sleeping Kings and Malak's former academy was oddly fascinating, the soaring cliffs and jagged peaks of Korriban's landscape creating an imposing yet beautiful backdrop. The wind buffeted the crew for the entire walk, providing a small bit of relief from the burning glare of the sun. Nobody said much of anything during the journey and even Kreia remained silent within Meetra's mind. Eventually, the towering entrance of the academy came into view and the former General realized that pyramid-like structure that was built directly into the surrounding mountain had probably been there for millennia. Malak had only rediscovered and repurposed it for his own needs.

The tall black doors were left partially ajar, allowing a thin beam of sunlight to illuminate the darkened building. It also helped to reveal the scuffs in the dust that covered the threshold and the floor just beyond. Noticing the potential tracks, Meetra raised a finger to her lips as she gestured for everyone else to be quiet. They softly crept through the entryway one at a time, pressing close to the walls as they fanned out to cover more ground and make themselves a larger target for any potential attackers. As they approached the end of the hall, Meetra pointed around the corner at one of the smaller wings of the building. The others acknowledged her signal and the group headed in that direction.

Slipping into a passageway that led to the student dormitories revealed no signs of anyone or anything else living. The rooms were all open, the beds and desks coated in a thick film of dust while forgotten possessions spilled from a few of the footlockers. Peering closer revealed that there were numerous datapads still set in stacks for convenient studying, flimsiplast sitting beside the texts so that students could take notes. It seemed that when this academy was abandoned it happened in a hurry. By the time they had circled through the area, it was obvious that the wing was unoccupied.

"I know I'm not supposed to say anything, but…" Sighing, Atton shook his head. "I'd put credits on Vash slicing the academy's computer system the second she got in here. So, she probably knows that all of the dorms can be locked down remotely and for obvious reasons decided not to stay in one. If I were her, I'd hide in one of the old classrooms so that I could have access to a terminal that controls a lot of the academy's functions."

"I assume that the classrooms occupy a lot more of the building? If so, it's going to take some time to cover the area safely." Meetra turned to the Zabrak. "Bao-Dur, can your remote do some of the work?"

"Technically, yes. But if he runs into a Jedi he might become lightsaber practice."

"Good point." For a moment Meetra considered splitting the group up, only to realize that Atton was the only one with any real knowledge of the building and that anyone exploring without him would be at a distinct disadvantage in potentially hostile territory. "Alright, I guess we'll work together and see what we can find."

The first corridor past the dormitories brought them to what had once been a library, most of the consoles now broken by neglect. The room looked like a smaller version of the Jedi Archives on Coruscant and for a moment visions of Atris passed through Meetra's mind. She shook her head to clear the thought. "Anyone find anything?"

Atton slipped a spike into one of the few working terminals. "Hmm, it looks like someone was accessing the system a few days ago, though it's impossible to tell who since all of the usernames are a series of numbers and letters. But it looks like they were using a computer in one of the training rooms."

"How do you know all of this?" Visas looked curiously at the Human.

"Every now and then, Malak had me take a break from assassinating targets to come here and teach some of his students the finer points of performing covert missions." Waving away the memory, Atton scowled. "And before you ask, I'm pretty sure that none of those kids ever got a chance to use what I taught them. I heard that Revan and his allies cleaned this place out about three years ago. I'm glad."

Furrowing her brow, the Handmaiden wondered, "You were an assassin? But I thought that the Jedi Order doesn't condone such actions."

"In case it hasn't been made glaringly obvious, I wasn't exactly a good Jedi. I fell… Or I assume I did. How else do you explain the fact that I killed people for Malak and never felt any real remorse?"

"Is it that you never felt remorse, or that you always felt justified?" When everyone turned to look at Bao-Dur, he bowed his head in contrition. "I admit that I joined the war effort for all of the wrong reasons. My people have colonies throughout the galaxy, many of which were decimated by the Mandalorians… including the one where I was born. I was angry at seeing my home destroyed so I volunteered for the Republic military. For years that anger is what drove me and every time I made or repaired something that helped kill more Mandalorians, I felt justified in what I'd done."

Visas glared at the Handmaiden even as she spoke to the Zabrak. "And how did you move past your anger?"

Shaking his head, Bao-Dur sighed. "I'm not sure I ever did. After I got done being angry at the Mandalorians, I was just angry at myself."

"Because of the Mass Shadow Generator." Meetra winced as she approached her friend. "I… I'm the one who gave you the orders to build that weapon. I'm sorry."

"And I gladly built it because I wanted to hurt the Mandalorians as much as possible. Anger is a vicious cycle, General. I can see why the Jedi don't approve of it."

"Maybe I did feel justified, but it wasn't because of anger. If anything, it was pride. I was one of the best at what I did. In the beginning, I convinced myself that I was taking lives for the greater good." Despite his insistence that he was remorseless, a haunted expression passed over Atton's face. "But in the end, I was doing it for the thrill of the kill. I remember my last mission, a senator named Yusanis."

Cold fury surged through the Force as the Handmaiden whirled to snarl at the Human. "Who was your target's name?"

"Yusanis. A senator from… Oh shit!"

A powerful Force push knocked Atton to the ground and he skidded awkwardly along the floor as he struggled to regain his balance. Meetra tried to hold the Handmaiden back as the other woman lunged for their companion, but the Echani was too strong and fueled by pure fury. She broke free and charged at the target of her rage, leaping into the air and coming down with a hard kick on the spot where he had been laying less than a second before. As he rolled away from the attack and onto his feet he reached for something hidden by the back of his jacket. The snap-hiss of a lightsaber igniting somehow startled them all even though they knew that the former assassin carried one. Maybe it was because this new blade glowed a silvery viridian.

"Look, I don't want to hurt you," Atton stated, falling into the opening stance of Djem So.

Glaring darkly, the Handmaiden assessed her opponent. "I do not share your sentiment!" Diving low, she attempted to duck beneath the range of the lightsaber as she sent out another push through the Force.

Atton stumbled again, regaining his balance by crouching down and slipping behind his adversary, striking her in the side with the hilt of his 'saber. "I can explain! I'm guessing Yusanis was someone you knew?"

"He was my father!" Tears streamed down the Handmaiden's pale cheeks, even as anger distorted her features. There was no strategy or finesse to her motions as she punched blindly at the Human, missing wildly as he neatly side-stepped the attack. "His death caused Eshan to devolve into chaos and when my master arrived the planet offered little resistance."

"That wasn't Malak's plan, I swear!" Holding up a placating hand, Atton lowered his lightsaber just a little. "He somehow knew that someone, or something, was targeting your homeworld and he wanted to declare martial law and use the Republic military to protect the planet. But Yusanis, your father, refused to approve the measure. Malak believed that the only way to save Eshan was to kill your father and cause enough political unrest to force the military to step in. And it worked… Sort of."

Panting hard, the Handmaiden stared accusingly at the Human. "Then why did Lord Nihilus still come?"

"Because we were too slow! By the time the military arrived to take control of Eshan, Nihilus had already attacked and left." Swallowing hard, Atton hung his head. "I'm sorry… About your father, about your home, about everything."

Crossing her arms over her chest, Visas muttered, "Yes, Sith. The actions of his master were meant to be a mercy."

"Stop it!" Giving the Miraluka a disapproving frown, Meetra placed herself between her arguing crewmates. "We need to stop fighting amongst ourselves. This academy is strong with the dark side and it's affecting our rationality."

"Not to alarm you, General, but it seems that we're not the only creatures being affected by the energy in this place."

Meetra was about to ask what Bao-Dur was referring to when she heard a growl from just outside of the library. Slowly turning towards the sound, she started slightly when she saw not one but four large beasts poised to sprint into the room. They were fearsome with curved horns, a row of spines running down their backs, and sharp teeth protruding from their long snouts. Without thinking, she reached for the new lightsaber resting at her hip, the familiar sensation of a curved hilt helping to calm some of her fears. But her mind was still unfocused, caught between the revelation that Atton had killed the Handmaiden's father and the realization that Alek actually believed that assassination was the only way to save a planet. She tried to thread her companions' minds together and create some semblance of cohesion between them but her thoughts were too scattered for her to gather the power.

"Aw kriff, those are tuk'ata…" The rest of Atton's hissed curses were swallowed by the roars of the creatures as they leaped at the Force users.

"Bao-Dur, I don't suppose you can convince these things that they don't want to eat us?" Meetra called as she tumbled beneath a wickedly curved claw.

The Zabrak was staring at a different tuk'ata, one hand extended as intense focus creased his brow. After a few moments, he stopped and backed away. "Sorry General, I think they're too hungry!"

"There's only one way to handle these schuttas," Atton warned as he slipped his shoto blade into his off-hand using a reverse grip. Leaping forward with help from the Force, he struck with his main lightsaber, severing the leg from one tuk'ata before stabbing his secondary weapon into its throat. "Oh, and be careful of the spines. They're venomous!"

Grumbling as she processed this new information, Meetra cautiously backed up to prevent being cornered by two of the beasts. The silver glow of her new lightsaber was strange but not unwelcome, the hilt more elegantly balanced than the Sith weapon she took from Dxun. Giving it a light twirl just to appreciate the sensation, she carefully led the creatures out of the library and into the more open hallway. Noticing that one tuk'ata was tensing to pounce she slid out of the way, crouching close to the floor before whirling around and stabbing her weapon between what she assumed was its ribs. It roared in agony, though it was soon put out of its misery as a bronze-colored blade sliced through its neck.

"You know, I think I'm getting used to this," Bao-Dur commented as his instructor admired the hilt that he had crafted over the past weeks. It was thicker and heavier than most models in the same way that his prosthetic was larger than his organic limb. It also possessed the same seamless craftsmanship.

Grinning in approval, Meetra vaulted over the dead tuk'ata just in time to spot the Handmaiden palm-strike one of the beasts in the nose when it lunged at her. Recoiling with a snarl, it turned and snapped at Visas as it violently shook its head.

"You have a weapon!" the Echani shouted. "Either use it or give it to me!"

"How much of a fool do you think I am, Sith?" Visas nearly bent backward as she ducked out of the tuk'ata's path, keeping her sight trained on the creature as she moved.

"It is fine if you hate me. But at least use your emotion for something productive!" Glaring at Atton, the Handmaiden dropped into a defensive stance as she extended both arms, moving them through the air and using the Force to push the offending beast into two of the broken consoles. It staggered as it struck, shards of transparisteel and twisted metal embedding in its flesh as it tripped and fell. Springing towards its prone form, the Sith brought her foot down on one of its legs. The bone audibly cracked as the creature howled in pain, though the sound was choked into silence as she wrapped her power around the tuk'ata's throat and squeezed until it collapsed.

By now most of the crew had made it into the hallway, followed close behind by the remaining tuk'ata which bit at their heels. "Are there any more after this one?" Meetra asked as she froze the creature in mid-leap, enabling Atton to dive beneath it and drive both of his lightsabers into its underside, raking them across as he raced clear of the viscera that poured forth.

"How should I know?" he demanded, just as a growl sounded from around the corner. "Though, I'm betting that there are."

Bao-Dur's remote veered towards the sound, only to come speeding back a moment later emitting high-pitched beeps of warning. Nobody had time to wonder what it said before a pair of massive tuk'ata charged into view, easily twice the size of four they had just defeated. One sniffed the air, scenting the blood that slicked the floor, before releasing a mournful howl and then baring its teeth at the Force users.

"Where those… babies?" Meetra nodded towards one of the corpses.

Atton raised his 'sabers threateningly. "Yes, and I think these are the parents who are blocking our path to the training rooms."

"Dammit." Reaching out with the Force, Meetra attempted to push one of the creatures back. However, she felt her power fizzle and then die in its presence as it shook its massive head in confusion. Its tail lashed out, the venomous barbs flying over Bao-Dur's shoulder as he ducked to the floor just in time.

The second beast leaped forward to defend its mate, its tail arcing through the air as its jaws closed around Meetra's leg. The large teeth dug into her calf and she yelped before turning around just enough to swing her lightsaber at the creature's muzzle. It carved a huge gash, causing the tuk'ata to retreat with a snarl. Seeing that Meetra had her situation under control, Atton turned and dove beneath the first beast's legs. He used the Force to slide across the floor before jumping to his feet and digging his main 'saber into the creature's haunch. It roared and tried to whip around to bite whatever was causing the pain, leaving its chest open for Bao-Dur to sink his own blade deep into its flesh. Hurt and enraged the tuk'ata reared back, its tail swinging around and jabbing Atton's right arm.

"Ah, shit!" Falling back, the former Sentinel grasped the wound, coating his fingers in blood and venom.

Without thinking, Meetra turned away from the tuk'ata she was facing and lunged at its more injured mate. Jumping into the air, she slashed at the thick muscle of its neck in tandem with Bao-Dur who struck viciously at the beast's right leg. While both attacks hit, it left their backs exposed to the second creature. Hot breath ruffled Meetra's braid as huge teeth snapped just beside her right ear. But they were prevented from carving through flesh by a violet blade that sunk deep into the beast's bottom jaw, burning through bone and tissue.

"Can you feel my anger now, Sith?" Visas hissed through clenched teeth as she drew her weapon back with a flourish. Without missing a beat, she pivoted lightly on her heel and made another strike just as the second beast's tail whipped towards her, severing the tip with a single swing of her arm. "You, who serve the thing that destroyed both of our homes?"

Unwilling to let the Miraluka's efforts go to waste, Meetra nodded to Bao-Dur as a thin thread of power linked their minds together. They circled around until they were flanking the wounded tuk'ata, diving forward simultaneously as they drove their blades into creature's abdomen. The scent of burning flesh filled the air, joined by animalistic roars as the beast made a final attempt to shake itself free and flee. But its life was quickly fading and as it staggered across the floor a bronze lightsaber slashed into its muscled chest just as a silver weapon carved a fatal wound across its throat. With a last gasp it collapsed less than a meter away from where Atton was still fighting the effects of the sting he received. A moment later Meetra was at his side, healing energy flowing through her palms as she purged the venom.

Visas remained unaware of the chaos around her as she stood her ground against the last tuk'ata, parrying each of its attacks with smooth strikes of her own as she used its momentum against it. An attempted bite became a wound in its neck while a lash from the remainder of its tail resulted in a cut seared into its hip. Sweat beaded above the Miraluka's lip and her face shone with perspiration, but she didn't back down even as her swings grew fatigued. Before the creature could take advantage of its opponent's weariness the Handmaiden flipped forward, shielding the other woman as she grasped the beast's injured muzzle in her bare hands. A brief flash of yellow shone in her pale blue eyes as she twisted cruelly, the harsh crunch of a neck snapping drowned out by her scream of outrage.

Dropping the corpse, the Sith turned to an exhausted Visas. "I joined Lord Nihilus because I had no choice! You would have done the same in my place."

The Miraluka jerked her chin up defiantly. "You know nothing of me."

"No, but I do know my master."

For a moment the Force surged frigidly with the strength of their combined anger before the emotion gradually receded, a faintly glowing thread of understanding blooming between the two women. Meetra watched from a distance, nodding quietly to herself as she sensed whatever silent agreement they had reached.

Bao-Dur also felt the slight warmth cutting through the darkness of the academy. "I know that the Jedi admonish anger and the Sith abhor peace, but from where I'm standing there's strength in both of those emotions."

"The dark side is what enabled Visas and the Handmaiden to defeat that tuk'ata and save our asses." Humming thoughtfully, Meetra added, "But if they clung to their resentment towards each other, it would have rotted them from the inside out."

"Speaking of rot," Atton interrupted as he gagged softly. "Does anyone else smell that?"

The sharp tang of fresh blood and charred skin soured the air, but beneath it, Meetra could detect the distinct odor of putrefaction coming from somewhere nearby. Covering her nose with her sleeve she nodded. "Yes. Maybe the tuk'ata had a nest somewhere?"

"I don't know. But I think the smell is coming from that room."

The battle had carried the group down a long hallway and into another wing of the building, positioning them between two large sets of doors. Atton was gesturing to the set on their left, a grim expression twisting his lips as he stared at the black stone entryways that loomed menacingly over everyone.

Smiling hopefully, Meetra asked, "Is that one of the training rooms?"

"Something like that." Atton didn't elaborate further, instead depressing the panel that opened the doors. They produced a harsh grinding sound as ancient gears groaned in protest, though that was nothing compared to the stench of death that wafted out of the room. Everyone immediately recoiled, covering their faces as they peered inside.

While Meetra assumed that this could be a training room by Sith standards, it looked more like a torture chamber. Cages lined one wall and various wicked-looking implements hung from hooks in the ceiling. But the main feature was a large stone table that sat off to one side, a set of lights illuminating a body that was growing bloated and discolored from the beginning stages of decay. Shrugging off Atton's hand, which was grasping her shoulder, Meetra walked stiffly into the room as she scanned the corpse for any distinguishing characteristics. Old, dried blood covered any areas that weren't decorated with cuts and bruises, making it difficult to see anything of note. But the hair was mostly clean and she immediately recognized the familiar gray and brown bun of Jedi Master Lonna Vash.

"It's her, isn't it?" Atton's voice was hollow.

"They tortured her…"

Idly tracing the scars that marked the skin beneath her robes, the Handmaiden nodded. "I can only assume that refused to give my master her secrets. The strength of her will must have been remarkable."

"It was."

The deep, gravelly voice sent a chill through the room and all of the Force users turned in unison towards the door. Sion's massive form now blocked the entryway, his cracked visage even more somber than usual. The snap of multiple lightsabers igniting filled the air as the crew spread out, trying to keep away from the Sith. But their tactic was hampered by the appearance of a second figure who seemed to melt from the shadows, his black robes making him seem nebulous and indistinct aside from the white and red mask hiding his face. While not as large as Sion, something about this new Sith terrified Meetra.

It took a moment for the former General to realize that the gnawing coldness encompassing the academy, a sensation that she had assumed was the aura of the building, was actually the signature of this cloaked figure. He exuded a ravenous, insatiable darkness that cloaked even Sion's remarkable presence, enabling the other Sith Lord to approach unnoticed. That was how they managed to trap the group in place.

A garbled shriek came from behind the mask, causing the Handmaiden to cover her ears as she collapsed to her knees muttering, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

Meetra's hand hovered near her commlink as she debated calling Bastila for assistance. The younger woman had firsthand experience with Sith Lords and might be able to help them escape alive. But there was a chance that Sion and the creature she assumed was Nihilus didn't know about the Hawk or it's remaining passengers and the former Consular couldn't risk endangering them by contacting the ship. But maybe there was another way…

'Kreia, can you hear me? Sion and Nihilus are here and I think we're in trouble.'

There was a flutter of acknowledgment in Meetra's mind but no other response. She clenched her teeth as she shifted her grip on her lightsaber, keeping both Sith Lords in her sight as she moved to shield the Handmaiden. "Leave her alone."

There was another garbled sound, this one almost akin to laughter. Sion joined in, a deep chuckle rumbling through his scarred chest. "You feel sympathy for an assassin sent to kill you. Strange, but I've come to learn that I should expect nothing less of you, Exile."

"What do you want from me? From us?"

"We have watched as you've searched for answers to questions that you have no reason to ask, all to aid an Order who discarded you without a second thought." Sion stepped forward, his broad form casting a long shadow across the floor. "Exile, surely you realize that this is not your fight. Abandon your quest here and now, and we will let you and your allies leave this planet unscathed."

Meetra slipped into an offensive stance as she raised her head in challenge. "I can't do that. If you've been observing me, you've probably realized that I have a habit of getting involved in fights that don't concern me."

"I have also witnessed the destruction that your intervention wrought upon Malachor Five. You know war and death, and I respect you for that. But though you have tasted darkness you did not embrace that power because you still fear it. And because you cannot hear the true call of the dark side there are things about the Sith that you will never fully comprehend." There was a low hiss as Sion ignited his lightsaber, the red blade glowing eerily in the gloom. "This is how it ends for you, Exile. Your futile search is your downfall."

"Did your master send you after me? Is it Nihilus? Some sort of true Sith?"

"I am my own master and who I pledge loyalty to is no concern of yours."

So, Nihilus wasn't the master. Meetra quietly tucked that information away should she manage to escape from this situation alive, which seemed increasingly doubtful. The Force was thick with her companion's fear, the combined weight of their dread settling heavily around her. But through it all, she could feel a flicker of hope and she was surprised to discover that the source was Atton. Glancing towards him, she noticed that his attention was focused just past Sion and into the corridor behind him.

Even without a true Force bond, she could sense the pilot's thoughts. If they could somehow escape the Sith Lords, he knew the inside of the academy well enough to lead the crew to safety. They just had to distract Sion long enough to run past, just like they did on Peragus. Meetra wondered if she could keep him talking. "You and your masked friend are the sources of the Jedi deaths and disappearances, aren't you?"

"The Jedi are the architects of their own doom, lost in their traditions and ignorant to the danger all around them. You know this as well as we do. We are merely speeding up what they have already set in motion."

Meetra wanted to object on principle, even as she mentally acknowledged the truth in the Sith's words. In the end, she said nothing. The Order had failed in so many ways that she had run out of excuses to defend them many years back. But there was still a question about one former Jedi that she needed answers to. "What about Revan? Where is he now?"

Sion shook his head. "I know nothing of the Revanchist excepted that he created you. That is all the information I need."

From the corner of her eye, Meetra noticed Atton shifting minutely, a slight shuffling of his feet that could easily be mistaken for nervousness or impatience. But he was actually trying to angle himself towards the doorway, something that both Visas and Bao-Dur also appeared to sense.

Nihilus must have felt a change in the room because he let out a garbled growl of warning as his masked face turned towards Sion. Though his expression was unreadable, the cloying darkness of his presence rippled and the air grew colder with his irritation.

Nodding once, Sion swung his blade into an attack position. "We have talked long enough, Exile and your final questions have been answered. Korriban is a planet of the dead, so it is fitting that you will meet your end here."

Despite the panicked pounding of her heart, Meetra's expression remained calm as she looked into the Sith Lord's good eye. "Funny, I was about to say the same thing to you."

Their blades sang as they swung through the air, connecting in a sizzle of plasma and sparks as the pair lunged at each other simultaneously. Sion was pure strength and aggression, and the power behind his strikes made Meetra's arms sting as she struggled to hold him off. But she only needed to guide him away from the exit long enough for Atton to get the others out. Pivoting on one foot, she took advantage of her smaller size and ducked beneath her opponent's slash before rising back up and attacking him from the side. While he parried the blow, the swiftness clearly surprised him.

Atton had given up on subtlety and was trying to take advantage of the opening Meetra provided, gesturing frantically for Bao-Dur and Visas to follow him. However, Nihilus saw everything and reached out an arm, his power rippling as he tossed the Human two meters through the air before doing the same to the Zabrak when the other man rushed to help his crewmate. There was an audible cracking sound as the mechanic struck the side of a cage. The accompanying groan of pain snapped the Handmaiden out of her daze and she looked up just in time to watch her ally crumple to the floor, her eyes going wide as she scrambled to her feet.

"Master, they are nothing! Do not bother…"

A high-pitched screeching filled the room as Nihilus frantically shook his head, turning away from the Ebon Hawk's crew to once again focused on his apprentice. Visas watched this, a thoughtful frown tugging at her lips. "Sith, keep moving! You are the only one who can distract this creature!"

Now torn between targets, Nihilus growled as he reached out a fist, his power wrapping around the Miraluka's throat as he constricted her airway and lifted her off the ground. Meetra was standing at just the right angle to see this happen, the distraction creating just enough of an opening for Sion to slash her forearm with a hard chop. The pain was intense, causing her hand to tremble as agony flooded her mind. But a rush of adrenaline enabled her to push past the sensation and slip around her opponent's back as she sprinted towards Visas. Just as she was close enough to help a foot reached out and struck her thigh, knocking her down.

"No Exile," Sion growled as he loomed over his opponent. "Their deaths will feed Lord Nihilus. Only you are mine to kill."

Screaming in fear and pain, Meetra aimed the sound at the Sith, baring her teeth as it caused him to stagger backward with one hand clutching his ear. "They're not going to die today, and neither am I!"

Twisting back onto her feet, Meetra thrust out her blade and met Sion's next strikes with renewed vigor. Red and silver clashed and hissed, the sounds of the duel filling the air as the Handmaiden clenched her fists and charged at Nihilus. Terror swirled around her in a frozen storm even as she rammed her shoulder into her master's ribs. "Run!" the Echani yelled. "Get out of here!"

Once again the garbled screeching echoed off the stone walls, Nihilus's smothering presence momentarily drawing back as he released his hold on Visas and turned to his apprentice. The Miraluka hit the ground hard, her knees striking the stone floor with a heavy thud. She cried out in pain but didn't collapse, instead reaching for her lightsaber and tossing it through the air. Guiding the hilt with the Force she called out, "Sith, if you are truly a warrior worthy of this weapon, prove it now!"

Nihilus was a blur as he moved to intercept the item but the Handmaiden's desperation made her faster. With a burst of Force-enhanced speed, she leaped up and snatched the hilt from midair, igniting the violet blade before her boots touched the ground. Dread filled her eyes as she turned to face her master, but she didn't back down even when he produced his own blade and met her first strike with an easy parry. Gritting her teeth she intensified her attack, each slash and stab strengthened by her terror. At first, the Sith Lord held his own but his impossibly quick movements soon became sloppy and unfocused

Still locking blades with Sion, Meetra only caught glimpses of her companions as she carefully dodged around the room. Atton was back on his feet, desperately herding a visibly shaken Bao-Dur and Visas towards the door. Wanting to draw attention away from them, Meetra flipped around Sion's larger form so that he was forced to turn his back on the exit. Kicking hard, her boot struck his kneecap and buckled one leg. With a shout she leaped up, plunging her blade straight through the center of the Sith's chest. His single good eye went wide as he stumbled backward, his broken body collapsing to the floor with enough force to shake the ground.

Fueled by exhaustion and a tenuous spark of hope Meetra ran past the apparent corpse, glancing over her shoulder long enough to see the Handmaiden making frantic slashes at her Master's blade. She was about to yell for the other woman to find a way to flee when a roar made her heart jump. Sion was already climbing back to his feet, the 'saber wound in his chest still smoking against his scarred skin.

'They cannot be beaten here,' Kreia's voice warned. 'Korriban runs through them, strengthening them beyond flesh and blood. Flee and you will have another chance.'

Meetra briefly considered raging at her mentor, demanding to know why it took so long for the older woman to offer advice. But she saw Sion beginning to move and she changed her mind, instead bolting towards the door as she shouted, "Handmaiden, please come with us!"

The Echani's chest was heaving as perspiration soaked her clothing. When two of her attacks missed by a wide margin Nihilus recognized that he once again had the advantage and dove towards his apprentice. But Meetra was already using the Force to drag the other woman away, pulling her to safety an instant before her master's blade struck the spot where she'd been standing. The brush with death was enough to make the Handmaiden realize that she had an opportunity chance to escape and she joined Meetra as the pair rushed out of the room and into the corridor. The others were just up ahead.

Sion's roar of outrage filled the hall but Meetra didn't look back. She could feel the cold tidal wave of his presence as he and Nihilus raced through the academy but she tried not to focus on the sensation. Drawing a shaky breath, she wrapped her power around her companion's minds, connecting them so that she could send the encouragement they need to keep moving. The Force fortified them and they found extra speed. The Sith were close behind but pure desperation fueled the crew and they managed to outrun any attempts to slow their progress.

"We're almost there!" Atton told them as the academy doors came into view, still partially ajar. Without breaking stride they all dashed into the searing heat.

It was disorienting to burst into the blinding sunlight, dust whipping around them and further obscuring their vision. "Which way now?" Meetra asked, her words muted by the howl of the wind.

'Flee into the caves that line the path leading into the academy,' Kreia ordered. 'They are still unexplored by modern Sith and hold mysteries that even Sion and Nihilus fear. But you are not Sith, so perhaps you will find answers within.'

Belatedly realizing how odd it sounded to answer her own question, Meetra pointed to the rocky cliffs that rose up on either side. "There's a cave system nearby! We can hide in there for now."

"Let me guess?" Atton panted, "Kreia told you."

Shrugging a little, Meetra jogged towards a jagged opening that was barely large enough for one adult Human to fit through. Motioning for everyone to join her she cautiously slipped inside, immediately igniting her 'saber to serve as a light source in the nearly pitch-black environment. Footfalls echoed behind her as the rest of the crew entered and soon they were all standing in the beginnings of a large cavern that stretched far into the rock.

Wiping the sweat from his brow, Atton ignited his main lightsaber. "Well, at least there's no wind in here."

"But there are some creatures nesting in the ceiling." Bao-Dur looked up with a grin, his remote beeping some information about the cave's temperature and moisture level. "Though, they don't seem as aggressive as those tuk'ata."

Handing the violet-bladed lightsaber back to Visas, the Handmaiden bowed her head. "Thank you for trusting me with your weapon. I appreciate the unique design. I assume that you left the crystal partially exposed so that you can…"

"Feel it resonating, yes." Accepting the weapon, the Muraluka ran her fingers over the casing. It was a far more minimalistic style than what the others had crafted, though that was apparently the intention. "You should build your own weapon, Sith. You fight well and it would be beneficial for you to arm yourself."

"Stop calling me 'Sith.'" Glaring in the low light, the Handmaiden shifted uncomfortably. "My name… it's Brianna."

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, Brianna." Meetra smiled at the Echani as she slowly walked deeper into the cave. "And thank you for the help back there."

Bao-Dur carefully kept pace with the former Sith apprentice, studying her for a moment. "I'm curious, do you know why you're able to distract Nihilus like that? It reminds me of holding an electromagnet too close to a droid."

"It's because she's Echani. Or, so it appears when you look through the Force." Noting the confusion on the others' faces, Visas explained, "Energy flows differently around both her and Atris. Perhaps it is because their people are so in tune with physical motion and communicate through combat. When they move, and especially when they fight, the Force ignites."

"Everyone's Force signature is unique, but I have heard that different species possess different patterns." Meetra laughed gently. "I'd say that makes about as much sense as anything else that happened today."

A comfortable silence settled around the group as they continued through the cave, the glow of their lightsabers illuminating the path just enough to prevent them from tripping over cracks or stumbling down a ledge. The light also seemed to keep the native creatures away, though they did growl and flutter their leathery wings to protest the intrusion. It was a while before Visas paused, her head tilting to the side.

The Miraluka reached out her hand. "Does anyone else feel that?"

"If you're talking about the Force, everything still feels just as miserable as the rest of this kriffing planet," Atton complained as he rolled his eyes and kept walking.

"No, it's not the Force. I think it's… fresh air?" Bao-Dur turned to his remote, which beeped in confirmation. "It seems like the airflow changes right around here."

Grinning in relief, Meetra moved her blade to check the nearby walls. "Maybe there's an exit nearby."

"Or just another cave inside of the first cave, because this entire planet is a nightmare." When he received nothing but doubtful frowns, Atton pointed to a small opening that was the source of the breeze. "I'm not joking."

"It could still be a way out…" Meetra shivered as she spoke, a wave of dark energy washing over her. And yet, there was something oddly familiar within the sensation.

"You're going in, aren't you? Don't try to deny it, you have that determined look in your eyes that means I'm about to follow you somewhere ridiculous."

Meetra shook her head at Atton. "I told you to stop pretending…"

"I wasn't pretending when I offered to travel with you wherever you go. That was all me. The real me. The person who wants to see the galaxy with you."

There was no lie in Atton's words, only heart-wrenching sincerity. Meetra felt her resolve to stay mad rapidly weakening. "Don't…"

Shrugging weakly, the former Sentinel stated, "You wanted the truth from me, so there it is." With that, he brushed past the others and slipped into the secondary cave. Meetra was close behind.

"Atton, wait…" The rest of whatever she was about to say died on her tongue as she looked around and noticed the geometric carvings decorating the soaring archways and domed ceilings that surrounded them. She sucked in a shocked breath, craning her neck back to study the intricate designs. "Wow."

"This is quite impressive. And it's… how old?" Bao-Dur looked at his remote in disbelief, but the droid only beeped insistently.

Brianna frowned when she saw the architecture. "These are Sith markings. But they are far different than anything my master ever showed me."

"Well, this is a Sith planet." Kreia's words suddenly floated through Meetra's mind. Perhaps you will find answers within… Drawing a deep breath, she walked through one of the archways and into a secondary chamber as she called, "Come on, let's see if this leads to a way out."

By the time they reached a third chamber the crew was pausing at random intervals, rubbing their temples or staring blankly at the walls for several seconds at a time. The behavior was disconcerting, but every time Meetra asked about it her companions insisted that nothing was wrong. In the fourth chamber, the others started talking to themselves.

"As I walk through the ashes of Katarr…"

"Visas, did you say something?"

"Hmm?" The Miraluka looked at Meetra, but her expression was unfocused. "No… But do you smell that? Something is burning…"

"General, behind you!"

Meetra whipped around, her lightsaber raised and ready to strike. But all she saw was her own shadow reflected across the carved walls. "Bao-Dur, I don't see anything."

"It's the Mandalorians, General. I think they caught our trail…"

"Shit." Meetra drew a few calming breaths as she tried to comprehend what was happening. "This cave is a Sith… something. So maybe the dark side energy is making them hallucinate?" The explanation sounded ridiculous, at least until Brianna started screaming.

"Father, no! What happened, who did this?!"

Immediately rushing over to Atton, Meetra grabbed his arm and dragged him out of Brianna's line of sight all while thanking the Force that the Echani was currently unarmed. "Alright, maybe you should stay away from her…"

"Sorry, I didn't catch that. Who's the target?"

"The… target?"

Atton nodded. "Yes, Supreme Commander. Tell me the target. I'll take care of things from there, just like always."

"Aw, karking hells…" Releasing her grip on Atton's forearm, Meetra spat a few more colorful curses as Brianna let out another mournful howl just as Bao-Dur shouted another useless battlefield warning. "This is bad. We need to get out of here and…"

The smell of smoke filled Meetra's nostrils, a familiar mixture of plasma mines and burning foliage. Dxun. Her companion's words were growing fainter, replaced by the shouts of soldiers and the shriek of blaster fire, occasionally drowned out by grenades exploding amidst the dense jungle. To her right, a soldier was asking for orders…

This isn't real, it's an effect of these caves. I need to break through these hallucinations to help the others.

But the caves were gone. Thick jungle surrounded Meetra, the trees shaking violently as detonations rocked their trunks and cracked their branches. The odor of wet earth mingled with the metallic tang of blood, the acrid burning of green leaves, and whatever chemicals were used in the multitude of incendiary devices that were being set off all around her.

The soldier was still staring imploringly, looking terribly young. "General, your orders?"

No, not this battle. Anything but this battle.

The scene shifted impossibly quickly and Meetra was staring at a minefield that she couldn't see only seconds before. Nearby was a small platoon of soldiers, all of them watching her intently as their fear made the Force grow unbearably frigid. She knew what orders she gave, accepting heavy casualties in return for gaining a large amount of ground in the Mandalorians' territory. It was an impossible choice to make, forcing her to decide between winning the war for the Republic or valuing the lives of her individual troops.

"General, your orders? Do we… Do we charge?"

I told you to charge. Most of you died but we won the day. Acceptable losses to ensure an overall victory, just like Revan taught me.

But here, trapped within her mind, Meeta could make a different decision. As someone who had spent seven years on the fringes of known space, she now knew how to disarm those mines. But did it matter? She could run through all of those mines herself and it wouldn't restore the lives lost. And ultimately they won the day. Hells, they won the whole damn war.

It must have taken her too long to decide because the scene shifted again and the platoon was charging. Meetra was half running and half floating beside them, watching as soldier after soldier was blown apart, their screams filling her ears as their deaths reverberated through the Force. But the violence never seemed to touch her, every spark and piece of shrapnel flowing around her, leaving her unharmed. She only slowed when the troops that survived reached the end of the minefield, battered and exhausted but still forced to face the Mandalorians waiting for them. Instinctively, Meetra swung her lightsaber into an offensive position, ready to fight whatever phantoms attacked.

I fought that day too, lightsaber versus beskad. They screamed when my blade rent their armor into slag.

As a Mandalorian took a swing at her, Meetra struck back. But something was wrong. Her blade, which had been green a moment before, was back to its silvery-white color. And the sword that she was locked with wasn't the heavy weapon of a Mandalorian but something far slimmer and more delicate. The image of the battlefield flickered and the shouts of her troops faded away, replaced by nothing more than the sound of her own heavy breathing. Dense jungle melted back into stone walls, the geometric Sith designs once again filling her vision.

But the individual she was fighting didn't disappear. Instead, they lunged at her with a double-bladed sword that looked strangely ancient in its design. She parried the strike and was shocked at the ferocity of her opponent. They weren't particularly large but their fighting style was incredibly aggressive. While Niman was designed to be a reasonable counter for most situations, she was fumbling horribly as she tried to deflect slashes and stabs that whirled towards her at a blinding pace. There was only one form that she had ever struggled this badly against.

Juyo. This is Juyo.

Blinking sweat out of her eyes, Meetra yelped as she took an elbow to the ribs. It knocked the wind out of her and she staggered backward, her feet slipping on the rough terrain. After barely managing to deflect a stab aimed for her throat she ducked down and rolled away, scrambling to put space between herself and her attacker. With some distance between them, she could finally see that they were a human male whose long brown hair was tied back with a scrap of cloth. His clothing was plain and gray, at least where it wasn't stained with blood and dirt. An unkempt beard hid most of his features, but Meetra could see that his eyes were a deep brown. They were amazingly expressive, accented by the noble curve of his brow, the straight line of his nose, and the high arch of his cheekbones. It was all achingly familiar.

Reaching out, she gently probed the man's Force presence with her own, nearly crying when the faintest glow of a familiar signature filled her mind. The majority of his signature was being camouflaged but she knew him well enough to sense what couldn't be hidden.

"Revan! Revan, stop!" Pleadingly raising her hands, Meetra looked at the face of the man who, at various points in the past seven years, she truly believed she would never see again. "It's me, it's Meetra!"

"I know who you are!" His voice was hoarse, as though he'd been screaming. "You keep reminding me! Every time we look down at Malachor you remind me that it was you who used the weapon and not me! Every kriffing time!"

Revan's sword came dangerously close to Meetra's middle and she jumped back, bringing her lightsaber up to guard her vitals. "But that wasn't me, it was just a hallucination. This cave makes people hallucinate!" It stung to realize that she was part of whatever horrors her closest friend had been witnessing.

"It's always you, Surik. Whether you're dark or light, it's always you…"

"But…" There had to be a way to prove that she wasn't a figment of Revan's imagination. Frantically parrying another hard chop with a motion that aggrieved the wound she'd received from Sion, Meetra wracked her brain to think of something. "Carth says hello! He says… he says to tell you that he's watching over the Star Forge and the Republic, just like you asked. But he also said to get your ass home because he misses you!"

"Did you say… Carth?"

"Yes! I saw him about a week ago, and Bastila is literally right here on this planet…"

Revan snarled as he lunged at Meetra, using the backside of his blade to sweep her legs out from under her. She landed on the cave floor with a grunt, the rocks bruising her back. "You can't know about them. It's impossible!"

"I know about them because I'm real you kriffing idiot!" As Revan dove forward to stab her in the chest Meetra kicked upward, catching him right in the gut. It wasn't a particularly hard hit, but it still managed to knock him back a few steps. He wheezed painfully, stumbling uncertainly.

"Shit, ow! What the… what the hells…?"

Suddenly, Meetra remembered that in her hallucination the violence never seemed to touch her. Everything felt real, but nothing had hurt. She climbed to her feet. "I'm the real Meetra Surik."

"You… You're real?" The sword clattered out of Revan's hands. "How…?"

"We came here looking for answers about the Jedi and about, well, you. How are you even on Korriban? Where have you been?"

"We're on Korriban?! I was on Dromund Kaas as a Sith prisoner but I escaped and… Shit." Revan reached out and grasped Meetra by the shoulders, physically pushing her towards the nearest archway. "There are Sith after me. You can't be here, you have to leave and…"

"Sith Lords? Sion and Nihilus? A big man who looks like he's held together by scar tissue and a masked figure in a black cloak?"

"No, these are actual Sith purebloods. They're a species with red skin and…" Pausing in confusion, Revan stared for a long moment. "Wait, did you say there's two of them?"

Meetra nodded. "Yes, they're here on this planet."

"There should be three."

Now it was Meetra's turn to look confused. "What?"

Revan blinked back. "What?"

"Karking bantha shit, what the hells is this place?!" Atton winced and rubbed his forehead. "I just re-lived… Well, you'll probably be happier not knowing."

"Jaq?" Arching a brow, Revan watched the other man with obvious bewilderment, a blank expression briefly ghosting across his features. "That's your name, right? You're a Revanchist. Were a Revanchist. And during the war, I trained you to… Oh shit. I trained you to hide your Force presence because we needed you to do something. I'm, uh, sorry for whatever horrible thing I made you do but don't remember."

Atton turned notably pale as he backed into a wall, his mouth opening and closing ineffectively before he finally stammered, "R… Revan?"

"Vann." He reached up and rubbed his grimy forehead. "Please, just… Just call me Vann. It's a long story."

"Memory loss. Ship crash. Alek, er, Malak tried to kill you." Meetra ticked points off using her fingers. "Carth and Bastila covered most of it."

"How do you know Carth again? And did you say Bastila is… here? And also, didn't your hair used to be different?"

Fingering her braid, Meetra twisted it ruefully. "That was a Jedi style. And, well, I'm not exactly a Jedi anymore, am I?"

"You were cast out of the Order. Right. I'm… I'm so sorry. About that, and about Malachor. How are you even talking to me right now? You should hate me for what I made you do! Hells, I hate me and I don't even remember most of it!"

Seeing the stricken expression on Vann's face, Meetra frowned. "So, you don't remember that I volunteered to be the one to set off the Mass Shadow Generator while you confronted Mandalore the Ultimate?" When her friend shook his head, she continued, "I could have refused. I wouldn't have been the first person."

"Huh?"

"You originally asked Alek to set off the weapon and he told you no. It was probably the first time during the war that you completely disagreed about tactics."

"I asked kriffing Malak to set off a superweapon and he refused?" Vann snorted at the very idea.

"It's true." Having finally found his voice, Atton approached nervously. "I was there. Or, at least, I was around for the aftermath. Malak was furious. He didn't think that you should have given the order to design a superweapon, and he especially didn't think that Meetra should have volunteered to use it. He was convinced that both of you fell and, to be honest, he was pretty damn scared."

"He thought that I fell?" Meetra and Vann asked simultaneously, both with the same incredulous tone. They glanced at each other and then back at the former Sentinel.

"Well, that's what he said at the time. But he also trained me as an assassin, so you're free to make your own judgments." Atton still looked a bit pale. "Also, why is Revan in a cave on Korriban?"

"I think that's another long story. And we should probably get out of this cave before we hear it." Retrieving her commlink, Meetra bit back a grin as she hailed the Ebon Hawk. The reception was poor, but Bastila's voice was still recognizable when she answered the comm.

"Meetra, are you alright?! Kreia said that she sensed Sion and Nihilus in the academy and…"

"Yes, we're all fine… more or less. We just need Tee-Three to used the Hawk's sensors to perform a scan of the cave system in the cliffs between the academy and the valley, and then analyze the data to locate a way out. He can probably triangulate our coordinates from my comm signal."

Vann was silent throughout the conversation, but his Force presence flared brightly as Bastila announced, "Yes, I think we've found something. It seems like there's an exit a few hundred meters away. We can guide you there fairly easily."

"That would be wonderful," Meetra sighed in relief. "But I'm actually going to hand my comm over to someone else who really wants to speak with you."

Awkwardly accepting the commlink, Vann muttered, "Uh… Hey Bastila. Before you ask, I can, um, I can explain."

"…Vann?!"

---

"You are an absolute idiot!" Bastila had been ranting at Vann for the past five minutes, in between her attempts to heal a nasty gash that ran across the top of his chest.

"As you've reminded me at least a dozen times already." Vann rolled his eyes at the chiding. After some time in the sonic, a shave, and a change into some spare clothes that he had stashed in one of the Hawk's hidden smuggling compartments, he once again resembled the person Meetra remembered. While he dressed more like a spacer than a Jedi, his penchant for black remained.

"And I'll say it at least a dozen more times until you get it through that thick skull of yours! How could you possibly think it was a good idea…"

"I was captured and tortured, Bastila." Some of the levity fell away as Vann's expression darkened. "Do you think I wanted that to happen to you, Jolee, Juhani, Dustil, or anyone else?"

"Maybe if we had all been there you wouldn't have been captured and tortured!" Though the Padawan attempted to send forth healing energy, the press of her palm only managed to reopen the wound.

"Ow, kriffing hells! Making me bleed more is the exact opposite of healing!"

"Bastila, you're angry right now, which isn't exactly conducive to healing." Meetra chuckled as she guided the other woman to sit down and take a calming breath. It didn't alleviate the flurry of irritation that was radiating through the Ebon Hawk's main hold, but at least she could examine Vann's injury. It was deep, the edges jagged and raw, through the worst of the bleeding had been stopped with a stimpack. Moving her hand in soothing circles, she summoned her own Force connection and sighed as healing warmth flowed from her palm. It knit the skin back together, leaving a fresh scar behind. Now that Meetra was examining her friend, she could see the dark circles that lined the skin beneath his eyes. "You should get some sleep."

"I'm fine."

Sighing in exasperation, Meetra gave the man a pointed glare. "You always say that and you're always lying."

Vann looked surprised. "How do you know I'm lying?"

"Because at the moment, I might know you better than you know yourself."

"Well, now I feel like shit because I barely remember you. And half of what I remember I'm pretty sure I hallucinated." A wistful expression crossed Vann's face. "We must have been close if you know me that well."

"We were. Alek was your best friend but sometimes…" Meetra paused, looking for the right words to describe the complexities of their relationship. "Sometimes I think I understood you better."

"Alek… You said that name back on Korriban. Was that Malak's name?"

"Yes. Honestly, he's still Alek to me. I never really knew Malak."

"Yes, you did." Atton's expression was somber as he glanced around the hold "The difference between the Jedi Knight and the Supreme Commander wasn't as big as most people think. Trust me, I probably know that better than anyone here. It was the Knight who trained me to be an assassin."

"I remember. Well, not all of it, but bits and pieces. Enough to understand why we decided that we needed assassins." Vann was nodding to himself, his eyes unfocused. After a moment he blinked, his gaze studying the younger man."You were one of the best, weren't you? I remember training you to hide your presence and shield your thoughts. Everyone else struggled, but you picked it up almost immediately."

"What can I say?" A faint blush crept across Atton's cheeks. "You and Malak figured out where my real talents lay."

Bastila scoffed. "You were talented in plenty of other areas besides assassinating targets…"

Shoulders slumping, Vann ignored his student's ranting. "Shit, you were only a kid at the time. What were you, eighteen?"

"Seventeen, but who's counting?" Laughing weakly, Atton managed to sound cocky as he explained, "I sliced my records because I wanted to be part of the war effort and I was too impatient to wait another year."

"That doesn't make me feel any better, you know."

Meetra shook her head, a flash of anger surging through her. "Why did I never know about these assassins? You shared all of your other tactics and strategies."

"I think there were a lot of things that I kept from you… and things that I told you but kept from Malak, or whoever he was at the time. I knew how much darkness both of you were willing to accept and I was careful to never push you too far beyond those boundaries. It was calculated." A scheming shrewdness passed through Vann's eyes, an expression that was entirely Revan. "I wanted your unwavering loyalty, and to get that I had to ensure that you didn't question my decisions. I wanted to save the Republic at any cost and I didn't want anyone to stand in my way, including the people I trusted the most."

"But why did you even need assassins?" Glancing over at Atton, Meetra realized that her outrage was as much for him as for herself.

Vann nodded, clearly sensing her frustration. His own presence was withdrawn and tinged in sorrow. "Because not every fight could be won on the battlefield. Even as a mercenary I knew that. There are always enemy strategists who stay off the frontlines, politicians who provide political backing and legitimacy to the enemy, underworld figures who sell weapons to the highest bidder… the list goes on."

"At first, I tried to excuse what I was doing by telling myself that I was evening the score." Laughing sardonically, Atton flashed a dark grin at Bastila, as though daring her to say something.

Ignoring the obvious bait, the younger woman merely muttered, "What I don't understand is why Malak needed human assassins when you had already built a droid to do the job."

When Vann shrugged helplessly in response, Atton cut in. "Malak never trusted that droid. He believed there were some jobs that only organics could do."

"Speaking of which, where is H-Kay? I left him on this ship with a datapad that might have helped you find me a lot sooner…"

As though sensing his master's distress, T3-M4 rolled into the hold urgently whistling an explanation. "Boo beep-beep whoop whoo. Boop boo-bee whoo!"

"The who put him in the what?" Even as Revan, Vann had never had a mind for binary despite learning a myriad of other languages with ease.

"He says that the Jedi didn't like the other droid, took him apart, and locked him in a closet." Meetra's brow furrowed in concern, and she hurriedly clarified, "I'm, uh, not 'the Jedi' in case you're wondering. I never knew there was another droid on this ship."

Atton snorted. "I think it's safe to say that nobody in this room qualifies as a Jedi."

"Yes, we're all shitty Jedi and the Order is richer for having lost us." Vann was already following T3-M4 around the hold, only half-listening to the rest of the conversation. It was good to see that he was still the same bundle of energy, unable to sit still without some sort of project to keep his hands busy and soothe his anxieties. "Now, which closet are you talking about?"

"Bee-whoop boo-boop beep!"

"Shit, the panel's fried. Tee-Three, can you help me…" There was a minor commotion from the corner as Vann and the droid set to work opening the locked closet.

Speaking over the noise, Meetra mused, "Ironically, the Order isn't better without us. They're dying and the Sith are winning."

"And we're going to have to save all of their asses, aren't we?" Arching a brow, Atton grinned. "Which… kind of makes us the better Jedi if you think about it a certain way."

"That is certainly not how it works, Jaq." Huffing indignantly at the very notion, Bastila turned to Meetra. "But I do believe that we may be the only individuals who are capable of defeating this new threat. We're actually quite fortunate to have found Vann when we did…"

That compliment was punctuated by a loud clatter as the pieces of a large droid tumbled out of the closet. Groaning when he saw the poor shape they were in, Vann sighed. "H-Kay, what did they do to you? It's alright, I can fix this. We'll have you spouting insults again in a few days."

Glaring at the reddish-colored droid, Bastila didn't bother to conceal her exasperation. "So exceedingly fortunate."

From that point on, Vann spent his spare time repairing HK-47. Which, Meetra assumed, was why she found him sitting on the garage floor a few days later with a glowrod tucked behind one ear. He was fiddling with his droid while conversing with Brianna as the latter crafted a new lightsaber. Dark stubble pepper the lower half of his face and his hair was pulled back in a messy bun that was already coming loose in several places. He looked so much like he did during the war that the sight made Meetra's heart hurt.

"Am I doing this incorrectly, Revan?" Brianna held up the pieces of a half-finished dual hilt, partially built from the remainder of her old weapon.

"No… Sorry. I didn't mean to stare. It's just that I think you remind me of someone." Vann blinked and shook his head. "But that's impossible. I'm pretty sure she was a lot older than you and also Human. No offense."

Brianna set aside the lightsaber pieces. "Your words do not offend me. I am only half Echani and I have been told that my features honor my Human mother. Perhaps you knew her. It is possible, as she was a Jedi named Arren…"

"Arren Kae? She was my teacher, but I think something bad happened to her. I'm sorry, I don't remember much more than that."

"I have been told of your memory loss. I don't remember much of my mother either, but my father told me that she was a great Jedi Master. She gave her lightsaber crystal to me when she was expelled from the Order due to her attachment to myself and my father." Holding up the deep blue crystal that she planned to set in her new weapon, Brianna admitted, "I've always kept it close to me but I never thought I'd have the opportunity to use it."

Frowning, Vann murmured, "What happened to your mother after she left the Jedi?"

"She followed you to war and…" Brianna closed her eyes. "She met her end in a great battle."

A cold lump settled in Meetra's gut. "Malachor. Master Kae was one of the only soldiers who volunteered to be part of that assault. Of course, she didn't know about…"

"The Mass Shadow Generator. Kriff." Shame bloomed through Vann's presence. "I… I'm sorry Brianna."

"There is no need to apologize. To fall in battle is considered one of the greatest honors to the Echani. If anything, I am the one who dishonors her memory. She was a great Jedi and I have done nothing to respect her legacy. Until now, her crystal never even resonated with me."

"I think that, towards the end of her time with the Order, Master Kae recognized the Jedi's flaws. I'm not sure she'd want you to follow in her footsteps." Shrugging, Vann offered Brianna a thin but genuine smile as he put down the parts he was soldering. "She'd probably be prouder of the path you're on now. You're not following a bunch of arbitrary teachings, you're following your own heart and aiding a cause that you know is right. That's never something to be ashamed of."

"I… Thank you, Revan." Brianna flushed a little before bowing deeply. "To be paid such a high compliment by a renowned warrior like yourself is a great honor indeed."

"It's just Vann but, uh, no problem. It's the truth."

Still clutching the crystal as she moved toward the exit, Brianna bowed again. Some of the worries had lifted from her face. "If you do not mind, I need to step away from my work for a time. My mind is racing and I do not wish to make a mistake. Perhaps I will go and meditate on what you have said."

Vann nodded encouragingly, waving to the Echani as she exited the garage.

After Brianna moved out of sight, Meetra settled herself beside her friend in silent awe. Everyone seemed to think that Vann was a different person since his memory loss but from everything she had seen, he was still the same man she'd admired since childhood. His simple words of encouragement to Brianna were almost identical to the conversations he frequently had with his troops during the war. He had often pulled soldiers or even other Revanchists aside during moments of doubts to assure them that their decisions were valid and that they were far more capable than they believed. The Republic always promoted the images of his impassioned debates with the Jedi Council or his rousing speeches right before major battles, but these more intimate moments were his greater strength.

"Your hair's a mess." Without asking for permission Meetra gently unfastened the tie so that she could unravel the tangles, combing her fingers through the silky strands. They were just as soft as she remembered. Revan had always been remarkably tolerant and even appreciative of her coddling, though she honestly wondered if Vann the mercenary would be as receptive. She half expected to be pushed away, well aware that those who made a living selling violence along the Outer Rim had little patience for tenderness.

But Vann leaned into the calloused fingers carefully smoothing his hair into a neat ponytail. "What are you doing?"

"Fixing it."

"Hmm. Feels nice." After a moment, Vann sighed happily. "Did you do this for me often?"

"Often enough. But then, you and I were always touching each other. I think it confused Alek at times, but he didn't grow up in the Order and didn't realize how normal it was. He was like Bastila and Atton, raised by his birth family long enough to still have memories of them."

"I don't remember any of that. I didn't even realize that I never knew my family."

"Well, I'm not entirely sure that you didn't know them. You're five years older than me and you've literally been a Jedi my entire life." Meetra hummed sadly as she completed tying Vann's hair back, momentarily feeling the old ache that came with thinking about the birth family she never knew. "I don't know how old you were when the Order found you, but you never mentioned a life before the Jedi."

"When you say that things were different for Malak… or Alek, what do you mean?" When there was no immediate response, the former mercenary quickly leaned forward and tried climbing to his feet. "I'm sorry, I'm asking too many questions. You probably don't want to answer them or even think about the Jedi…"

Grasping her friend by the shoulder, Meetra pulled him back down. "Vann, it's alright. I don't mind talking about the people we used to be. It's been seven years and I've had time to come to terms with a lot of things." She drew a slow breath, chasing away her own sorrow. "Alek was a lot older by the time the Order found him… Already a teenager, if I remember correctly. He was originally brought to Coruscant and I was still an Initiate on Danootine at the time, so I wasn't there when it happened."

For a second, Vann's eyes grew unfocused and his expression became lax. It passed quickly, but his voice was still distant when he stated, "They had us train together because we were only a year apart in age and they thought that I would be a… good influence? Kriff, they got that one wrong."

"You were a prodigy. It was a reasonable, if not humorously incorrect assumption."

Vann scoffed in disbelief. "I was a prodigy?!"

"Nobody's told you that? What, do you think your connection to the Force is average?" Meetra chuckled at her friend's shocked expression. "Master Kavar once told me that you were so talented it intimidated the other Padawans. Alek was new to the Order and didn't know who you were. You both needed a friend, so the Masters made a decision that they later regretted."

"But was attachment different for him? Or for us?"

Meetra noticed the flicker of concern that passed through the man's dark eyes. "You remembered something important."

"I'm not sure. Maybe? It might be nothing." Vann sighed, studying the blonde closely. "I just have some memories of us as older teenagers back on Coruscant. The way he used to look at me… Did the Order train me not to notice those types of things?"

The laughter that burst out was completely unintentional, but it felt good. Meetra tried to hold back her giggles, especially as bewilderment and a bit of irritation flowed through the Force, but she couldn't fully contain them. "I'm… I'm sorry for laughing. It's just… This has nothing to do with the Order. You've always been good at convincing others to help you or at reassuring them when their own confidence falters. What you just did for Brianna? That's what made you such an incredible leader. You have a natural charisma that makes others want to follow you."

"But?"

"But you've never been good at understanding certain emotions. Love, at least anything non-platonic, has always puzzled to you. And you were never able to acknowledge that your choices could hurt others emotionally, especially when you were just trying to serve a greater good."

Vann groaned softly as he realized, "Like when I left for Dromund Kaas and didn't tell anyone."

"I was really surprised to learn about you and Carth." Meetra gave her friend a look of admonishment. "But I wasn't particularly shocked to hear that you left him and everyone else you care about without any real warning. And that message you gave to Mand'alor doesn't count."

Clearly eager to change the topic, Vann muttered, "So, Alek…"

"I don't know how much you remember, but I always suspected that he was in love with you. How much of it was admiration and how much was genuine romantic interest I can't say but…" Sadness crept through Meetra as she recalled the way that Alek's gaze always followed Revan with such unrestrained adoration. "For him, there was always something more than camaraderie."

"And I never noticed."

"Not that I'm aware of." Grinning sardonically, Meetra tried to lighten the mood by adding, "It's probably not a bad thing. There's a good chance you would have kriffed it up spectacularly."

Vann remained somber. "Because I didn't already? I'm the reason he fell and dragged the entire Republic down with him."

"No!" The amount of anger and resentment that surged forth surprised Meetra and she drew a breath to calm herself. "Alek chose his path in life. Just because he followed you to war doesn't mean that you're responsible for his fall or his choices afterward."

"But he…"

"He loved you, but that love isn't what poisoned his heart. That was the dark side." Glancing at the bulkhead, Meetra whispered, "Probably the same darkness that we're fighting now."

There was a long minute of silence before Vann hung his head, mumbling, "I'm sorry I'm not the man you remember."

Sorrow spread through the Force, chilling it with so much shame and doubt that Meetra's heart broke all over again. It was the same emotions she had felt a thousand times during the war, always joined by the heavy cloud of anxiety that surrounded Revan whenever he began fearing that even his genius wasn't enough to save the Republic. Tears stung her eyes at the memory and she tried to blink them back, but they continued to flow. Sniffling softly, she flung her arms around her friend's shoulders, gripping him protectively as she fiercely insisted, "No, you're exactly who I remember."

"Meetra…" Vann gathered the smaller figure in his arms, wrapping her up in a tight embrace that was comforting in its familiarity. His awareness flowed forth and he must have sensed the truth in his friend's words because warmth bloomed around him, chasing away some of the uncertainty that clung to his presence. When he finally spoke, his tone was firmer. "I'm not the Republic's only hope, you know. You may have been expelled from the Jedi Order but that isn't a punishment. It's freedom. You're no longer bound to Masters who don't see their own faults, or to a system of beliefs that's become so entrenched in the past that those who follow it can't see the danger in front of their faces."

Hastily brushing away tears, Meetra snorted. "I thought I was the one comforting you."

"I think the war broke us both in different ways and we're each struggling to pick up the pieces. I don't know if this helps, but… I do have a memory of who you were before. You must have been a brand new Padawan when you told me that you wanted to be a Consular so that you could settle conflicts and bring peace to the galaxy." Vann grinned at the thought.

Meetra blushed faintly from embarrassment. "Do you also remember the way my bangs used to stick-up in different directions and the little gap between my front teeth that sometimes whistled when I talked?"

"You still have a tiny gap, it just doesn't whistle." Dodging a playful swat to his shoulder, Vann continued, "The galaxy as a whole cares more about actions than fancy titles like Knight or Master. So, you don't need to be a Jedi to bring peace to others. Just look at everything you've done for your crew. You've given them unity, a place, and a purpose. Hells, you've probably helped more sentients in a few months than most people do in a lifetime."

"Carth claimed I was collecting lost souls."

"I can't say he was wrong. You've gathered quite a collection."

Meetra laughed again, leaning hard against her friend's shoulder. "Thank you."

"For what?" Vann arched a brow, his presence clearly puzzled. "I didn't do anything."

Shaking her head, Meetra leaned up and pressed a soft kiss against his stubbled cheek. "You've done more than you'll ever realize."

Vann still seemed confused at this response, but his expression softened at the gesture just like it always did. Eventually, they settled into more comfortable conversation, trading stories about Meetra's crew and their adventures. Vann wanted to know more about them, and about their interactions with Carth and Canderous. In turn, she asked about the search for the Star Forge and what had transpired to turn Canderous Ordo into the new Mand'alor. It felt like only minutes had passed, but by the time they climbed to their feet their joints were stiff and their legs felt sore from spending hours seated on the garage floor.

It wasn't until later when Meetra was brushing her hair after getting out of the sonic, that she really thought about Vann's advice. It echoed what Kreia had told her back on Korriban. Consular, Jedi… they're just words. Actions are what we're truly judged on.

'What has the Revanchist awoken within you?'

Carefully dividing her hair into smaller sections, Meetra scowled at the mental intrusion. "You're avoiding him, shielding your presence so that he doesn't notice you. Why?"

'Revan has learned everything I can teach him. There is nothing more to be gleaned from our interactions.'

"He still might want to see you."

'And what makes you think that I wish to see him? That I hold any more affection for him than I do for Sion?'

Frowning at the thought, a rush of anger froze in Meetra's veins. "And when you're done with me, will I become one more discarded footnote in your history?"

'Perhaps. And perhaps it is better that way. Passion, be it love or hatred, is often blinding. Great affection will always prevent you from being truly objective.'

"I think you're jealous." It wasn't entirely true, but Meetra wanted to see what her mentor would say to the accusation. "Revan was my teacher long before you were, and now he's back."

'You still have much to learn, child. The lessons to come will be your hardest yet and the Revanchist is ill-prepared to handle them.'

Irritated at the older woman's vagueness, Meetra snapped, "What do you actually know of the future, Kreia? Have you seen something, or are you only guessing? Sometimes I think you like to be cryptic because you don't know any more than the rest of us."

Laughter reverberated through the bond. 'Ah, now you are finally asking the right questions. Good. You are right to doubt me, just as you should doubt any member of your crew… including the Revanchist.'

"I trust him because he's given me a lot of reasons to, unlike you."

'You should not trust me. It's wise of you to think critically and it is better to be wise than merely intelligent. That is why the Mandalorians feared you so.'

"The Mandalorians feared me because I killed them," Meetra declared, looking at her reflection in the refresher mirror. She wasn't weaving her hair into its usual braid, but instead something far more complex. "But fear and death will only get you so far."

'And so I ask you, someone who has seen the death of the Force and has lived blind to its power, who has brought armies to their knees and has in turn been rendered completely helpless, what lies on the other side of it all?'

Meetra smiled at her reflection. "Potential."

(line break here)

Author's Notes

Thank you for reading. Comments and constructive criticism are always appreciated!

You can find me on Twitter (ergo_maria) and Tumblr (ergomaria). Feel free to say "hi" or ask me any questions.

1. Atton killing Yusanis had been planned since No Light without Shadow (the first time the attack on Eshan is mentioned). I knew it would be a good way to give Atton's assassinations a "personal" connection.

2. Atton's new viridian blade is a tribute to Meetra, who carried a green blade during the war. This is an intentional choice for the character and the author.

3. Swapping Brianna and Visas had a lot to do with the events of this chapter. I wanted them to have a connection that initially created conflict between them, but ultimately bound them together.

4. And that's where Vann landed. I've obviously taken a very hard left from canon but in my mind, Revan and the Exile's stories are completely intertwined. This is THEIR story, though Meetra and her crew are still the primary protagonists.

5. I've read a lot of stories and theories in which the Exile hates or resents Revan because of the Mass Shadow Generator because Revan used the Exile to complete the task without caring about the consequences. I like that angle, but it didn't feel right for my characters. Meetra is far too thorough to undertake something as important as the Mass Shadow Generator without understanding its nature. Similarly, Vann may be utilitarian at times but he'd never assign a task as important as the MSG to someone who didn't comprehend the consequences.

I also wanted to add a new dimension to the relationship between Revan, the Exile, and Malak. In my story, it's Alek who has the most resentment over the MSG, viewing it as proof of how far the others fell. There's a lot more to unpack there, including the fact that Alek always viewed Meetra as the lightest of them even if she wasn't. There's also the fact that he started falling out of love with Revan when his friend decided to create the MSG. But that's a story for another time.