The prompt for this was "A world where the heroes serve Salem, and the villains serve Ozpin." Obviously I made it silly.
"Alright," declared Ruby. She and her teammates stood over the defeated forms of Watts, Tyrian, Cinder, and Hazel. "It's time to see who these guys were really working for!"
Ruby pulled back the curtain that covered the doorway deeper into the base. Everyone gasped when they saw the bespectacled man who was revealed.
"Professor Ozpin?!" came a chorus of voices.
"Yes, it was me!" cried the headmaster of Beacon.
"But that's impossible!" came a voice from the Seer Grimm that floated alongside the students.
"Master?" asked Blake.
"That can't be..." Salem continued. "Because I was working for Ozpin!"
Everyone gasped in surprise.
"But that's impossible!" cried Sage, the most that anyone present had ever heard him speak. "Ozpin was working for me!"
Everyone gasped in surprise.
"Ruff!" came a sound from the entrance. The group turned to see Zwei entering, a small group of Beowolves following him with their heads bowed. "Ruff ruff!"
Everyone gasped in surprise.
Several shocking revelations later.
"OK, so let me see if I've got this right," began Jaune. "Team WTCH was working for Ozpin, and Team RWBY was working for Salem, but Salem was working for Ozpin, and Ozpin was working for Sage."
Everyone nodded in confirmation, so Jaune continued.
"The Grimm were working for Zwei, and Adam was working for Yang, and Raven was working for Whitley, and the Shadow People were working for Sun, and Qrow was working for Cardin, and Velvet was working for Weiss, and Ironwood was actually Neo in disguise."
Again, everyone nodded.
"And Torchwick was working for money, and Nora was working for pancakes, and Zwei was working for belly-rubs, and Neo was… Neo, what were you working for?"
Neo held up a cue card that read "LOVE."
"Aaaaaww," everyone sighed.
"OK," continued Jaune. "So Neo was working for Torchwick, and Neon was working for Jacques, and Glynda was working for Neptune, and the God of Darkness was working for Henry. Is that everything?"
Jaune looked around and saw everyone nodding their heads.
"So who was working for me?" he asked. Behind him, Pyrrha raised her hand, but Jaune didn't see it. When no one else answered, he slumped his shoulders in disappointment.
"So now we all fight?" asked Yang.
"I mean, we could," answered Weiss. "But who would be fighting who?"
For a moment, no one answered, all trying to work out the complex web of alliances in their heads. Then, Nora broke the silence.
"Free for all!" screamed the hyperactive redhead.
In an instant, the entire group launched into action, each pummeling the person closest to them. Bullets flew, weapons were swung, and Auras shattered. Blood splattered onto the ground. Only when the last two combatants fell, striking each other down in the same second, did the curtain descend on the chaotic melee.
Shandromand leaned over his desk, eyeing TedOrAlive with fascination.
"But what would you call such a fanfiction?" he asked.
Ted gestured excitedly with his hands as if presenting a billboard with the title emblazoned on it.
"The Aristocrats!"
Author's Note: For those of you who weren't aware, Shadromand is the guy who runs Writing Prompt Wednesday. You can check out his stuff here.