Disclaimer: Supernatural doesn't belong to me, only the plot, and some characters (such as Lily) belongs to me.
English is not my native language, so I apologize in advantage for any mistake I might have.
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Chapter 4
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The lights were flickering as she passed through the hallway, heartbeat growing erratic as she tried to outrun the flickering of the lights and reach the part of the house that was still illuminated, being easily frightened of the dark, imagining, as any child of her age does, that a monster waited for her in the shadows.
"Mommy?" The small child called out, messy blonde curls bouncing as she walked as fast as her little legs allowed her to. Desperation started to get the best of her and she started to cry, "Mommy?"
As she reached the end of the hallway, she caught a glimpse of a tall figure she recognized observing one of the light-bulbs on the wall to his left, moving to carefully tap at the flickering bulb until it returned back to normal.
The child sniffled and ran to the figure of her father, crying out a: "Daddy!", and jumping on his arms as tears continued to fall from her green eyes and she held into him as though her whole life depended on it.
Her father was taken off guard, because he had tugged her into bed an hour before, but was quick to pull her up and held her against himself, concern crossing his features once he realized she was crying.
"Oh, baby, what's wrong?" He asked in concern, observing her to see if it was that she'd accidentally hurt herself, but she had no visible wounds, the only thing out of place was the tears running down her cheeks. She was always a happy child, dancing at all times and giggling when her older brother tried to copy her moves; everyone hated to see her cry.
"Daddy, there's someone in the house."
His blood went cold, startled by those words. Out of everything he would've imagined her to say, he never fathomed hearing something of the such. But then, he realized what was happening, and a soft, amused smile appeared on his face. His daughter was growing up and reaching the stage where she was scared of the monsters under her bed or inside her closet. Her older brother was just in that stage, so the father considered himself almost an expert consoling his children.
"No, baby," He said gently. "There's no one else here. It's only a bad dream."
She shook her head, looking nervous and scared as she held tighter into his embrace. "No, daddy. When mommy went to give me a goodnight kiss, there was a man watching her in the shadows. Mommy didn't see him. It followed mommy out of the room and then disappeared."
The young man shook his head, gently moving a hand over her cheeks to clean the remaining tears away. "You were already asleep when mommy went to give you a kiss, baby. Remember? We were watching cartoons with your brother downstairs and you fell asleep, so I carried you to your room."
But the small child was stubbornly convinced of what she had seen. "No, daddy, the yellow-eyed man woke me up and followed mommy-"
Her father chuckled at her stubbornness, thinking that she had inherited it from her mother. He interrupted her by saying, once more: "It was just a dream, sweetheart. There are no yellow-eyed men in the house. There's no one else but us here."
"Are you-" The small child sniffled, "Are you sure?"
Her father was everything to her, she was a daddy's girl through and through, and the fact that he was convinced about it having been a nightmare made her feel more at peace, though she had been certain it was not a nightmare.
"C'mon, sweetheart, let's find mommy and get you back to bed, okay?" He put her into the floor and held out his hand for her to take as they walked together.
A scream cut through the air just as they reached the hallway where the baby's nursery was.
Her father called out an alarmed name- the name of her mother- and started running towards where the scream had come from, pulling his daughter with him.
"Stay behind me," He instructed the child, imagining the worse. What if his daughter had been right and there was someone in the house? His wife wasn't one to scream- she even killed the spiders around the house without any hesitation at all.
Now inside of the baby's nursery, the room was illuminated, and it appeased the child's nerves a little, but she couldn't ignore the fear that hearing her mother's scream provoked in her.
The father approached with relief, finding his son safe. "Hey buddy, you okay?"
The child leaned forwards on her tip-toes to look at her younger brother, who was still awake and happily cooing at the toys dancing in the baseball's themed mobile over his head.
"Where's mommy?" She looked away from her brother and around the room as she moved to grip her father's elbow, frightened by the scream they'd heard.
The father's relief was short lived. As he leaned over the baby's crib, a few drops of an alarming red color fell into the pillow, and when he moved a hand to touch whatever the substance was, two more drops fell into his hand, and it was then that he was able to recognize that it was blood.
Scowling, he turned and looked at the ceiling from where the blood was coming, just as his daughter produced a heart-shattering scream, ("Mommy!"), having seen before her father the image of a young woman glued to the ceiling, blood coming from an invisible wound on her stomach, fire slowly engulfing her as she struggled to breathe.
"No!" The father screamed, falling backward into the floor in shock of what he was seeing, not understanding a single thing about the situation, but overwhelmed with pain at seeing his wife in that way. "No!"
The fire that engulfed the blonde woman started to reach the whole ceiling, going down the walls, until the heat became strong enough to make the three alive figures in the room recoil from it.
The baby and his older sister started crying harder, scared and traumatized all at once, and it was then that their father managed to shake himself out of his shock in time to grab the baby and push the two-year old girl out of the room.
They stopped in the hallway, where the four-year old son of the couple met them, startled at the fire that he could see coming out of his brother's nursery.
The older man wasted no time. He pushed the girl towards her older brother, and then carefully deposited the baby into his small arms. He met their startled gazes, swallowing a turmoil of emotions that came his way when he realized his baby-girl had seen her mother on the ceiling. That his wife was glued to the ceiling for some inexplicable reason, and that their whole house (including his wife, their mother) was being consumed by the mysterious fire.
"Take your brother and sister outside as fast as you can and don't look back!" He instructed the older sibling, who remained frozen on his spot at the harsh tone of voice his father had used with him. "Now, Dean! Go!"
The blond boy took on a run, holding between his arms his younger brother, and looking over his shoulder every five seconds to make sure his sister was following them. She was slower than he was, but the three of them managed to get outside of the house faster than they ever had before.
They stopped in front of the house, watching the window of the baby's nursery, from where the fire came from.
The baby on his arms started to make soft wailing noises, to which he carefully left a kiss on his forehead. "It's okay, Sammy. It's gonna be okay. We're here." He looked up to meet his sister's gaze. "Are you hurt, Lily?"
She shook her head, still crying, "Mommy," which was the only thing she could bring herself to say, remembering over and over again the scene she had seen but couldn't understand completely due to her young age. She couldn't stop crying because she thought her mother was hurt, because her mother didn't move an inch when she called out her name, because their father was still inside the house.
"It's okay," Dean drew her into a hug, carefully making sure that Sam remained between them unharmed and uncrushed. He was concerned about their mother too, but hoped that their father's delay meant he was helping her out of the house. "We're gonna be okay."
Their father came running from inside the house in that moment, and grabbed them into his strong arms, hurrying them away from the house, to the other side of the street, in time for their house to completely explode in flames.
The neighbors started coming out of their houses calling out for them, others hurriedly calling the fire-department while they motioned for the four Winchesters to approach their end of the street and to get further away from the burning house.
When the oldest kid innocently asked where their mother was, worried with the fact that she hadn't come out of the house and the fire seemed to have surrounded it whole, John Winchester couldn't bring himself to answer, and both oldest kids were able to comprehend, even though their innocence and young age, what it meant.
...
For the four hunters, the following morning started in an unconventional way. The news of the most recent attack on campus reached their ears as soon as they went out to get lunch, an event that made them realize they needed to act before the number of victims increased.
Bobby wasted no time and, right after having a quick lunch, went directly to the morgue.
Tricksters could only be killed with a stake to the heart, but it had to be bathed in the victim's blood, which meant that the old hunter had to steal whatever remains of their blood he could find.
Meanwhile, the Winchester siblings drove towards Crawford Hall.
The blonde woman remained quiet through the whole trip, feeling shaken by the nightmare she had of her mother, a memory she had been almost convinced she had successfully pushed from her mind. Sam noticed, but thought it better not to question what was on her mind. Dean, on the other hand, was too concentrated on their plans to notice how unusually quiet his sister was.
The plan they'd created was simple enough, Lily was meant to distract the janitor while Sam and Dean revised his locker to search for something that could incriminate him further, but, as was to be expected, things didn't go as planned.
Loki wasn't nowhere in sight when they arrived in campus, and when they asked for him at the janitor's lockers, one of his co-workers told them it was his free day.
The three hunters stayed behind for a couple of minutes, hoping to be able to break into his locker, but the room was full of other janitors, and no matter how much they waited for them to go do their respective jobs around campus, none of them made any attempt to leave.
"One would think janitors would actually do their job," Dean muttered angrily as they walked back towards the parking lot. "I swear last time we were here, there was not a single one of them in the lockers."
"Maybe he did it on purpose," Sam suggested, shooting an amused look at his older brother when his words made their sister roll her eyes. "He must've known we were coming and made sure not to be here, and left the lockers protected, too."
"Janitors have free days," Lily shot them a stern look, annoyance crossing her features. As usual, the green-eyed woman had a headache that affected her mood- all due to lack of sleep. "Just like every other worker does. This is just a coincidence."
"I thought you said you didn't believe in coincidences." Dean crossed his arms over his chest.
Lily chose to ignore his words, having no idea how to defend herself.
It was true that she didn't believe in coincidences, she liked to think that there was a reason for everything to happen.
It was one of the many beliefs that distanced her from her father, who couldn't fathom the thought of bad things having a reason to happen other than the world being a fucked-up place. In his point of view, there had been no reason for his wife to die; she had done nothing wrong, she had been the perfect wife, the perfect mother, the perfect human being, and she did not deserve to die the way she did. He resented his daughter for even implying that events as horrible as that one had a reason to happen.
"And I thought we had agreed that he's innocent until proven guilty," She shot back at them, turning her head to the side for a brief moment, noticing how her brothers shared a look.
"We're trying to prove he's our man," Dean pointed out, moving a hand to his pocket to collect the keys to his car. "It hasn't exactly been easy."
"We're not saying it's all an elaborate plan from his part," Sam said, though he was starting to believe that it was. "We just find it curious how he was always around at first, but now that we suspect him, he's nowhere to be seen."
"You have to admit," Dean nodded in agreement of his brother, looking down at his sister. "It is kind of strange."
They stopped in front of the Impala, the three of them wondering if there was something else they could do before heading back to the motel.
That day had felt like one big waste of time, because they weren't able to do the investigation they'd intended to, and they were running out of time.
Every passing day without hunting their monster meant danger for other humans around campus. It had been a while since they had encountered a case with so many complications, and it made them feel helpless every time a new victim was announced.
"I know it's strange," She wasn't as blind as her brothers thought her to be, she could see that there was a valid reason to suspect Loki. "I just don't want to end up staking the wrong man."
"Let's just head back to the motel," Sam sighed, exasperated with how uneventful that day had started.
Lily was already opening the passenger's door to the Impala when she nodded at his words, saying: "Maybe Bobby had more luck than us," while knowing that he must've had some complications at the morgue.
Most of the Trickster's victims were dead, which meant that all their blood had coagulated. They couldn't soak their stakes in that, it would have no effect at all. She imagined the old hunter must've gone straight from the morgue to look for the only victim alive- the abducted frat kid.
After the experience Curtis narrated, Lily doubted he would be willing to give some of his blood to anyone, much less trust a stranger enough to hear whatever excuse Bobby managed to come up with.
"Actually..." Dean hesitated, then continued, "I have an idea." When he saw that his siblings had focused their attention on him, he then directed his words to the blonde woman. "But you won't like it." He waited for a couple of seconds before expressing what was on his mind. "We need to revise his locker today, we don't have more time to waste, there are new victims every single day. And, it's because of our urgency, that I thought about asking Caleb to open the locker for us-"
"No," Lily interrupted him, mouth dry. "Absolutely fucking not."
Sam shared a look with his brother over their sister's head. The tall man hadn't thought about that idea before, but as soon as he heard it, he knew it was what they needed to do.
"Lily," He started, "Think it through, it's a good idea. Caleb is also a janitor, it wouldn't be strange for other janitors to see him in the lockers, and he can open Loki's locker for us without it being an issue. Besides, the sooner we find proof that incriminates him, the faster we'll be out of here, and you won't have to see your ex again in a long time."
"Everyone will be happy," Dean concluded, nodding as he thought about it. "We'll be killing two birds with one stone. We'll find the proof you want, then we kill the Trickster, and students around campus will be safe."
Sam had a soft smile on his face as he watched his siblings with twinkling eyes, having an idea. "We could have dinner together, just the three of us, once this is over. What's the name of the place in Utah that we used to go together? Uh, the one where we fought a poltergeist-"
Lily shook her head, having a faint reminder of the place his brother was mentioning. It was a nice place, one of their favorite restaurants in the whole state, and at first it sounded like an amazing idea, but she realized soon after that it was an attempt to convince her, and she refused to accept.
They couldn't understand how she felt, how painful and frightening it was to see her ex-fiancé again.
It was something she didn't want to deal with. She had nothing against him, but seeing him brought back a lot of memories that she didn't want to remember.
It was better if they were as apart from each other as they could be.
"No," She repeated firmly, interrupting Sam's plans with Dean. At the tone of voice she used, both brothers turned to look at her, eyebrows raised. "If you two want to involve Caleb, be my guest. But I won't be a part of it."
"It's just for a moment," Sam tried to convince her, not noticing how nervous she had gotten after their brother mentioned what his idea involved. "It's not like you two will be alone, we'll be by your side."
Dean relented, "If Sam and I do as you mentioned and involve Caleb for just a moment, where would you even go? Back to the motel with Bobby?"
But the blonde woman had an idea of her own. "No. I'm going to see if I can find Loki on my own. I can at least distract him with my presence, just for enough time for him not to be able to choose a new victim. That, if he's really our Trickster, which I'm not saying he is or isn't."
Lily's hands trembled as she talked, an unconscious reflex that portrayed a great deal of anxiety in her system.
Her brothers were able to notice at last how shaken she looked, and realized that, perhaps, there was more to the story of her previous relationship that they previously thought.
Feeling guilty for having caused her such a reaction by mentioning his idea, Dean looked away and cleared his throat uncomfortably, not knowing how to behave after said realization.
"Be careful around him," Dean managed to say at last, voice sounding a little strained. "He's still our main suspect, and if he did this just because he thinks we're onto him-" He gestured to the building, referring to the fact that there were other janitors guarding the lockers. "I don't want to know what he'd do if he realizes you're trying to distract him."
"I'm not scared of him," Lily said sincerely. She couldn't feel any kind of ill emotion towards him after how he behaved the previous night, how he had attempted to protect her against the unknown creature following her.
It was a slight complication, because she needed to be alert and cautious around him in case he was actually their Trickster.
"It's not about fear, it's about your protection," Sam protested. "If something happens when you're with him, don't hesitate to call us. Don't act out on him, just wait for us to arrive, okay?"
"Dude, I'm twenty-four, and I learnt how to hunt before learning how to write. I know what I'm supposed to do."
Despite what Sam could think of Lily's response, she felt much better after his words. Her younger brother portraying his affection towards her was one of the main situations she cherished the most in her young life.
Lily's role had constantly been the same- she had raised him as a mother would, despite the fact that she had been only two years older than him. Because of that, she felt accomplished every single time that Sam showed how compassionate and caring he was, because it meant that she had done a good job- that both Dean and Lily had done a good job raising him and imparting him the manners that John never taught any of them during their broken childhood.
A small smile appeared on Lily's face, her eyes seeking Dean's similar ones over the small distance that separated the three of them. We did well. As though knowing what she was thinking about, the blond man nodded imperceptibly, and allowed a pleasant, though rather small, smile to cover his lips.
There were several things, however, that Dean hadn't had the time to tell Lily about.
They had been too immersed on the case, and even the brief times that they weren't, Sam had been with them, and what the oldest Winchester needed to tell his sister involved their little brother.
Lily didn't know the circumstances that drew their father to his death, she didn't know the things that were happening to her little brother at the time, she didn't know of the plan that the yellow-eyed demon had for him.
She was in the dark about many aspects of their recent lives, and it was driving him insane.
When the time comes, John had told him, moments before he died, if you can't prevent Sam from becoming what the yellow-eyed demon wants him to, you must act. You have to protect your brother, Dean, no matter the consequences.
But Dean had hope in his brother.
Sam was not the monster that John believed he could be if the yellow-eyed demon's influence on him grew. Dean was sure of that; his brother was not going to become what his father feared. He was a lot of things (obnoxious being one of the main characteristics Dean could think of at the moment right after an argument with him) but the poor kid was not evil. The yellow-eyed demon was not going to transform him into a (figuratively speaking) monster, Dean wouldn't allow him.
I've never stopped protecting him, Dean had fought back instantly, unable not to justify himself, even as he could see it was his father's last moments. We both have, Lily and I. Together we can protect Sam.
No, John had widened his eyes instantly, a distinctive emotion crossing through his face, to the settle into a look of regret that his oldest son had never seen on him before. Your sister made her choice when she turned her back on this family. It's your job alone now to protect your brother.
But at that exact moment, when his sister smiled at something that their youngest brother said, Dean thought his father's words were absolute bullshit.
He watched, lost in thoughts, how the green-eyed woman approached Sam and left a sweet kiss on his cheek, making him smile down at her in pure, unfiltered, adoration.
Dean was brought out of his thoughts when he felt his sister leave a sweet kiss on his own cheek. Despite what he had been thinking, he couldn't help but smile at the gesture, a warm feeling crossing his chest and going up to his throat, leaving an uncomfortable lump there. He hadn't noticed before, but in that moment, he was unable to deny just how much he had missed having her around.
"Please," He called out as she walked away. "Be careful."
She turned to give him one last smile, her green eyes twinkling as she did. "Always, love. Don't forget to call me as soon as you guys find something, and please don't mention me to Caleb. It's enough that he knows I'm around, he doesn't need to know more."
Sam nodded, understanding flashing through his eyes. "Don't worry, we won't."
Dean made a promise with himself to have a conversation with her as soon as their case ended.
To hell with what John had said before dying, Lily had never turned her back on them. The important thing was that she was there with them again, and most of all, she deserved to know what was happening. She was their family, she was their sister.
There were a lot of things they needed to discuss.
Before leaving, both blonds shared a small look, an imperceptible nod being passed through them.
They had been together for enough time to recognize each other's signals and, judging by how serious her brother had looked at her, she imagined there was something he wanted to discuss with her, and it was highly probable that, as usual, it involved their little brother.
...
The blonde woman walked around town without having a specific direction in mind, driven forwards with her desire to put as much distance between her ex-boyfriend and herself. It was probably stupid considering all the years that had passed, but she didn't feel ready to interact with him again, she just couldn't.
She hadn't lied when she told her brothers she was going to try and find Loki on her own, but as she strolled through the streets, she realized it had been only empty words- she wasn't doing anything to find him, she wasn't even conscious of the people around her.
Her thoughts were suffocating her, distracting her from her self-imposed task.
She just wanted to be alone for a little while.
Lily stopped to rest in a park far from Crawford Hall, finding it to be a beautiful place that didn't deserve to be ignored. She sat by the shadow of a tall tree and watched her surroundings distractedly.
Unlike most of the parks she had seen around the country on her hunting trips, that specific one was bright and colorful, with tall trees that spread through the whole place, and blooming flowers that made it look like one gigantic meadow.
There were families enjoying their day and playing with their children, there were dogs running around their owners...it was a place that she liked, but that brought her some melancholy as she watched how happy those families seemed to be.
She never had any of that on her childhood, she never had an opportunity to go to a park and just have a picnic with her brothers, not even when she was allowed to attend high-school in multiple cities.
Her father often brought her on his hunts, which didn't allow her much time to enjoy herself after school. And when they were younger, she wasn't allowed to take her brothers out of their motel room- direct orders from John, who didn't trust them to be safe in the outside world without him.
She thought about Caleb, and how much he had wanted to have a family with her.
If she closed her eyes, she could picture herself there with him, in that park, enjoying their day as their children laughed and played with one another. It had been the life he had wanted for them, the life he promised would make them happy.
But it was also the life she could never have.
Lily opened her eyes, not realizing that she had closed them, and sighed as she leaned down against the tree's trunk.
As Caleb had admitted in one of their last fights, she didn't have what a woman was supposed to have to get married- she couldn't see herself being domestic and taking care of a whole house, and he was never going to settle down for having to do the domestics of the house himself; he was keen on the absurd idea that it was a woman's job.
As for the family he wanted to form, if she was sincere with herself, she did want to have children. Perhaps one or two. But she was also aware that, given the world she had been forced into as a child, she couldn't risk to have any. They would be in constant risk because of her job, and even if she abandoned her life as a hunter to raise them, she had already made enough enemies for it to still be risky.
No matter how much she wanted it, the perfect life of those families around her in the park, laughing and being happy and safe, wasn't a life she could belong to.
Seeing Caleb hurt because it reminded her of all she couldn't have.
It hurt because she still, to some extent, loved the memories of him that she had.
Lily was smart enough to realize she deserved better- he wasn't the ideal man most of the time, he had been controlling and he had caused her more pain than joy- but she couldn't bring herself to forget about him completely. She had loved him like she had never loved anyone else before, and it had been consuming enough for her to still feel the remains of those emotions, however toxic it had been for both of them.
She didn't want to see him because she didn't want to go down that hole of toxicity once more, but it was something she couldn't tell her brothers; she didn't think they would understand.
She had been resting against the tree, watching around without really looking for something in specific, when something jumped at her. She let out a small yell of surprise, then saw an energetic little dog (a corgi) on her lap, watching her with incredible attention as it seemed to be unable to stop wiggling its tail at her.
"Hey, there," Lily laughed, holding one hand out for the puppy to smell. "Aren't you a pretty thing?"
Once the small puppy didn't give signs of being against her caressing him, she moved her hand through his soft fur, scratching behind his ears and watching with a smile how he seemed to melt under her touch.
She looked around, trying to stop the dog's owner, but those around her were immerse on their own business. The blonde woman then tried to read what the tag on his collar said, but he was too energetic for her to be able to do so. She laughed every time he lunged forward to her face and licked her cheeks, gently pushing him down, only for him to jump at her face once more.
"Yes, yes," She said softly as she tried to evade some of his kisses, and before he could attack again, she moved and planted a soft kiss upon his small head. "I like you too, buddy."
As she looked up once more, wondering where the puppy's owner would be, her eyes found a familiar figure making its way towards them.
Loki.
Her heart did a double take as soon as she saw him, though she forced a smile into her face and beckoned him closer with a small wave.
When he approached them, he gave the blonde woman a friendly smile, then settled his eyes on the dog.
"There you are!" He crouched down and opened his arms to the puppy, beckoning it towards him, "C'mon, boy. Leave the pretty girl alone."
Obediently, the puppy moved out of Lily's arms and jumped at Loki's expecting arms. He smiled and scratched his head as he moved to sit by her side under the tree's shadow, allowing himself a pause from his plans enough to spend time with the green-eyed woman.
The blonde woman gave them a curious look, not having expected the sweet dog that approached her to belong to the man she was supposed to be looking for. The most curious thing was, though, that as usual, there had been no need to look for him. They constantly found themselves in the same place, as though they were meant to continue colliding with each other unexpectedly, as though they were supposed to be together.
Or perhaps, she thought to herself, it was all one elaborate plan from his part to distract her from her original task.
"I didn't know you had a dog," Lily decided to act as though everything was normal, not knowing what else to do. "He's really cute."
Amusement crossed Loki's features. He moved his head to the side to glance in her direction. "We never reached that topic of conversation between all the chaos happening around campus." He looked back at the puppy on his lap, lazily scratching behind his ears as he said, "His name is Cupcake."
Lily couldn't help but smile, amused with the unusual name. "Cupcake? Really?"
Loki grinned unabashedly, "What can I say? I like all things sweet, cupcakes included." His words only made the young woman at his side visibly tense, because Bobby had told them that Tricksters had a fast metabolism that indulged them to develop an intense love for sweet things such as sugar and candy. "And this little fella is certainly one of the sweetest dogs I've had the pleasure of adopting."
Lily found herself observing him, though rather distracted with her thoughts. He seemed like he belonged in that place, a relaxed look on his face as he lazily leaned back on the ground and continued caressing his dog, moving one arm over his head to shield his eyes from the sun.
It was a sight that made a pleasant warmness cross through her chest, though it was fairly different to the melancholy she had previously felt when watching other people around the park having a nice, enjoyable evening with their loved ones.
He looked human.
As though sensing her eyes on him, Loki tilted his head to the side and locked eyes with her, a gentle smile appearing immediately on his lips as he caught her staring.
He rejoiced in the blush that adorned her cheeks, thinking to himself that she looked radiant that day, but knowing that she was trying to find something inhuman in him, something that would incriminate him.
A Trickster couldn't be tricked, he was aware of her brothers' plans for his fate, just as he was aware that she didn't seem to share their suspicions, which allowed him to enjoy what would, most certainly, be one of the last times they would see each other. It was only a matter of time before they realized he was indeed the creature they were trying to hunt down. It was only a matter of time before he would be forced to leave the quiet life he had formed in the city and start over somewhere else.
"I always wanted to have a dog," Lily admitted distractedly. "But my father wouldn't let us get one."
"Really?" Loki leaned back against the tree's trunk. He knew every single detail about her life, but there were things he wanted to hear from her perspective, events he had overlooked through the years. "Why?"
"We were in constant movement because of our job, but it was just an excuse that my father used with us when we asked him for something. He didn't like animals, not even dogs or cats, he thought that caring for them was a waste of time."
John had also mentioned that he didn't have time to care for an animal, which had turned out to be true considering that he didn't even have time to care for his own children.
"My brothers don't care much for animals," Loki started to say, bringing her out of her thoughts. He looked almost as lost in thoughts as she felt. He was thinking that, in fact, his brothers haven't cared much about anything that their father created, but he had always found himself interested in the masterpieces his father gave life to. "But my father loved them."
Through thick and thin, God had loved every single one of his creations, even when they broke his heart in pieces and forced him to give them their free-will; even when he had been forced not to interfere in their lives, he had always loved them.
But things had changed, his disappearance had brought chaos and pain upon every creation of his.
Loki hadn't thought about his father's disappearance for a long time- it was the one thought that caused him enough pain to want to push it as far as he could inside of his mind.
"Are your brothers here?" Lily was curious about him, though she wasn't supposed to be as interested in him as she felt.
Something different crossed his eyes after her question, though it was brief enough for her not to be able to recognize what emotion it was. She recalled what he had mentioned about his brothers, how they constantly fought with one another just like her own brothers did, and she had to wonder if the look that crossed his face meant that things were still complicated between them.
For a moment, she felt embarrassed for having asked, but it was driven out of her mind once he shook his head as an answer.
"I haven't seen them in a while," Loki admitted carefully, a little cautious of the whole topic. "We have very different perspectives about certain subjects, which eventually prolonged the constant fights between ourselves, something that I didn't think I could continue handling."
"So," Lily had to swallow the lump that had gotten stuck on her throat, understanding more about his situation than she would've previously believed she would. "You left them?"
Loki stared at her in a way that made her think that, perhaps, she wasn't the only one that could sense the connection between them, that could feel how similar to each other they were.
It was a thought that frightened her, but at the same time, that made her feel less alone in the world.
"It's not easy to see those that you love more than anything else in the world try to destroy each other," He said at last, a guarded expression on his face. "I couldn't stand to see them like that. The worse part of it was that they wanted me to choose a side. They wanted me to choose what brother I loved more than the other, and what brother I would be willing to see destroyed, and I couldn't stand that," He sighed tiredly, then allowed himself to meet her eyes, knowing that he'd find comprehension there. "I had to leave."
Lily took a moment to process his words, then nodded quietly. "I'm sorry you had to go through that, I know from personal experience that it's never easy to abandon your family, but sometimes it's something that needs to be done."
The green-eyed woman was thinking about her own choices, how she would always regret having abandoned them, but it had been something she needed to do to properly heal from all the emotional and physical abuse she received from her father through her childhood.
"What about you?" Loki wanted to move the conversation around, not thinking that he could be able to continue talking about his brothers without becoming overwhelmed with all the melancholy he had attempted to push down through the centuries. "Last time we talked you mentioned you were reconnecting with your brothers, how's that going?"
"It's actually going pretty well so far, which, if I admit so, surprises me."
"Having siblings is...complicated," Loki chuckled, nodding in understanding.
"I can go from loving them to wanting to kill them in literally five seconds," Lily laughed, "I'd die for them, but I would also totally murder them if they tested my patience."
"And that," Loki smirked. "-is the joy of having siblings."
They shared a small laugh, then a comfortable silence covered them.
It had been a while since she had felt as comfortable around someone as she felt around him in that moment. There was just something about the place, about how close to each other they were sitting, about how his puppy rested between them in the short space that separated them that made her feel alive. She felt almost whole, as though she were exactly where she was supposed to be, as though she had found her place in the world, which didn't make much sense when she tried to think about it.
Caleb had never made her feel like that. She had never felt like she belonged at his side.
When she looked at Loki, however, she couldn't help but feel as though she finally belonged there, in the park, as though the two of them were better together. To some extent, it scared her deeply; no one had ever made her feel like that before, not even her ex-fiancé, and she didn't know him well enough to be feeling those things. He wasn't only a complete stranger- he was also the main suspect of their hunt.
It was wrong.
But being with him felt right, like it was supposed to happen.
Somewhere to their left, Cupcake lay on the ground, exhausted at last, chewing on his paws.
The sun had begun to settle, casting a soft golden gleam through the whole park.
For a moment, as she looked at the man on her side, she couldn't help but think that he looked like an angel with the sun's golden glow over him. It accentuated the color of his hair, the paleness of his skin, the vivid amber of his eyes.
It was a sight that, in all honesty, stole her breath away.
In that moment, Loki turned his head to look at her, a soft smile playing on his lips. "This is nice," He said at last, looking as though he shared her thoughts, to then teasingly add: "Have you been following me? We've ran into each other constantly these past days."
"You can thank your dog for us seeing each other today," Lily said, and as though the small dog could understand those words, he leaped into action and started to lick her cheeks once more, his tail wiggling in excitement. She giggled as it happened, muttering a soft, "I think he likes me."
Loki watched the scene with a warm smile, something different crossing his features this time. "That makes two of us."
Lily looked down, hoping to hide the smile that crossed her face at his words, forcing herself to push back the warmth that had spread over her chest. Sam and Dean could be right about their assumptions, the least she needed was to become sentimental with the monster they were meant to hunt.
Observing her reaction made him feel accomplished. Despite how inappropriate and forbidden it was, he couldn't dismiss the fact that he had a soft spot for her, and that, as startling as that discovery was, he found himself wanting to be on the receiving end of her smiles and soft looks at all times.
His duty was to protect her, Loki convinced himself as he ignored all the warnings that Heaven seemed to be sending down to him, because a guardian angel was never meant to directly intervene with their human. They were just supposed to watch and gently guide towards the right path through a series of events that humans would later catalog as coincidences. But, he smirked to himself, he was never good at following orders.
He ignored all the sirens going out on his head, reminding him that he was not even supposed to approach her, and said, "I could take you out to dinner, if you'd like," while he pondered on the possibility of her discovering his real identity before her brothers could even fathom the existence of angels.
People had the tendency of considering Sam to be the smart brother, Dean to be the perfect soldier, and Lily to be the rebellious runaway, but Loki knew better than to degrade her to those titles. He could see that she shared some of their characteristics: she was loyal, fierce, and willing to play her role as a soldier; characteristics that Dean bore. In a similar way, she was also intelligent, intuitive, and kind; attributes that often described Sam. But she was different in her own way- she was different in a way that made her be similar to him.
Sam and Dean Winchester were two different sides of a same coin.
His father had once mentioned the same thing about Michael and Lucifer, leaving both Gabriel and Raphael out of said stereotype. He could see then, having been around the young woman for enough time, that she was similar to himself in that sense.
Lily couldn't help but to give him a teasing look, "If I hypothetically said yes...?"
She wanted to accept, but there was the whole issue that he could be their Trickster stopping her.
Loki knew what she was trying to do, he could see how she tried to focus on her mission from time to time to no avail. It made him realize that she also felt the intense connection that tied them, though she was probably confused about it as she didn't know the same things that he did.
He acted as though he were thinking it through, then said, "I would be very hypothetically happy," and meant it.
He had always felt great admiration and love towards humans, he was one of the only angels that liked being on Earth surrounded by them. However, through the course of his immortal life, he had never wanted to be around a human as much as he wanted to be around her. It was something that should have scared him, but that he imagined had to do with their connection as guardian angel and assigned human.
"Yes," The words were out of her mouth before she could stop herself. There were about a million things telling her she was playing with fire, that she needed to be cautious around him, but she pushed those thoughts away, allowing herself just one moment to act upon what she wanted. "I'd love to have dinner with you."
Surprise shone on the blond man's face, eyebrows raising in contemplation of her words. The young woman across from him seemed almost nervous after those words were out of her mouth, another blush covering her cheeks. Seeing how flustered she looked, he allowed himself to feel the warmth that overcame his senses every time he was in her presence.
It was wrong, but at the moment, it felt right.
Being together, even when it was just talking, or teasing each other, or bluntly flirting, or even having a discussion, felt right.
Loki had watched over her from the exact moment, the exact second, she was born, and even when he decided to leave heaven to become a Trickster, she remained under his protection because there were things he couldn't bring himself to leave behind. He left his family, that he loved more than anything else on the whole universe, and doing so destroyed him. He held into her because he couldn't leave everything behind or he'd go insane.
An angel was assigned only one human to protect on their lifetime, and she had been the one assigned for him to protect. Her brothers were vessels, and while she was lucky enough not to be involved so directly with them, she had, quite literally, an archangel on her shoulders.
Because of the rules that prohibited it, he never thought he'd get to meet her, which made him reluctant to leave her side now that he had the privilege of meeting her.
They had so much in common, he never though it possible for someone to share the same internal conflicts when it came to the matter of family, and he wondered if that was the reason for his father to assign that particular human to him.
He found himself wondering if guardian angels were prohibited to meet their assigned humans because they'd feel the same fascination and connection that he felt towards Lily, or if it was a different case and their connection had nothing to do with heaven and all to do with themselves.
That theory was quickly disregarded when he remembered that his siblings often mentioned that their assigned humans felt like a burden. He had never agreed with that statement. Lily Winchester had never felt like a burden. Now that he had the chance of being in her presence instead of simply watching from far, he could admit that she felt special, different. She felt like a friend.
"I actually know of a place that allows dogs," Lily said suddenly, "It's only a few streets away."
"Yeah, we should get going," Loki stood from the ground in one swift movement, crouching down to tie a leash to Cupcake's collar before straightening once more. "Lead the way, sweetheart."
They started walking together.
As they were leaving the park behind them and entering the streets once more, they maintained small talk through most of the trip, and when she inquired what his job as a janitor included, he deliberately took a moment to answer, something that she noticed but decided to ignore, and at last, as they were almost approaching the restaurant that the blonde woman had guided him to, he cheerfully said: "Cleaning the University's campus so those crackhead students can live in a healthy environment."
At those choice of words, Lily raised her eyebrows, a look of disgust crossing her young face. "That sounds like a nightmare."
He shrugged, not giving it much importance. "Sometimes it is. But it's not always bad. Kids are not always bad."
Lily moved a strand of her hair that blocked her eyes away from her face and observed him, drowning on the warm feeling that persisted since they started walking together.
The young woman couldn't deny the fact that she liked him- more than she was supposed to- and it was because of that attraction that she felt, that connection, that she could only focus on how it felt to be around him, thus forgetting that she was supposed to be cautious around him.
She just couldn't see him as a monster, not when she took in consideration the way he treated her, and how he had seemed to want to protect her from whatever had been stalking her recently, and how, in that moment, when he talked about the students in campus, his voice had been full of respect for them.
"You actually like your job," She tilted her head to the side. "And you also like the students?"
Loki gave her a curious look, not understanding where she wanted to get with that point. "I do."
"But most of them are-" She stopped herself, not knowing how else to address the situation. The amount of times she had heard her ex-fiancé mention all the horrible things he had seen through the years there had never escaped her mind; it was awful to think of all the drugs, all the rape, all the violence happening around campus. It unnerved her to no end. "Most of them are really fucked up and do horrible shit just because."
"They're flawed," He conceded carefully, "But a lot of them try to do better." It had only been a simple phrase, but it laced with a deep amount of passion and respect, something that left the woman at his side pleasantly surprised. "And, in my opinion, that's what matters."
Lily didn't know much about demigods, just what she had learned in the last twenty-four hours. They were the offspring of a deity and a mortal. It had been mentioned in one of the conversations, however, that they had the tendency of shutting down their mortal side and adopting a 'holier than thou' attitude based on their half-divine status.
It was an attitude that she had never seen on Loki.
He was charismatic most of the time, and while he had a smirk that sometimes portrayed mischief and trouble, he hadn't acted arrogant in front of her before. The more time she spent around him, the less she believed him to be their Trickster.
"Can we talk about last night?" Lily asked suddenly.
Loki seemed startled with the change of topic, looking at Cupcake walking ahead of them before looking towards her and cocking one eyebrow in her direction. "You make it sound like we fucked last night and then refused to acknowledge it."
Her gentle touch on his arm- she was holding into his bicep as they walked- distracted him. It seemed to ignite a gentle fire that warmed him in a pleasant, comfortable way. She was close enough for him to be able to smell her perfume, it was sweet and alluring in a gentle way, making him feel intoxicated.
He always preferred sweet things (smells, candy, etc.), even before becoming a Trickster.
Everything about her felt gentle and sweet, but he knew it was quite the opposite- she was perfectly skilled to kill anything on her path if needed, there was supposed to be nothing remotely gentle about her persona.
However, when he looked into her eyes, he could only see kindness on her soul.
It made a lump form on his throat when he remembered that all her that made her gentle and sweet would be gone as soon as the apocalypse started. Things would drastically change, and as much as he wished he could stop it from happening, some things had been set in stone since his father created the universe. Some things had to happen.
Lily found herself rolling her eyes at his words. "I'm a grown woman, not a teenager. Sex is not a topic I'm afraid to touch, I wouldn't not-acknowledge having a one-night stand with someone."
He'd been about to answer when they approached an old-looking building with several circular chairs outside, overlooking a small garden that looked very well-cared for. The inside of the shop could be seen through its transparent crystals windows; it was a small place, but it had an air of sophistication that couldn't be found in most modern restaurants. The shop's main theme seemed to be flowers, because that was what adorned the door, the windows, the sign with its name. It seemed like a nice place, and he could almost picture them sitting in one of those tables, his puppy laying down by their feet as they laughed and talked- it seemed like the perfect place to spend time with her.
The perfect place for their last conversation.
"This is it," Lily brightened, leaving behind their previous conversation. "Petal's café."
"I'm not digging the name," Loki shrugged as he looked around. "But I like the place."
The tables were small enough for them to be extremely close to one another, for which once they sat across from each other, their legs kept brushing. In an attempt to be more comfortable, he pulled her chair closer to his own and allowed her to gently rest her knees against his own, the closeness delighting both of them.
Cupcake lay by their feet between them, aggressively chewing on his own paws.
"The first time I came to this place was to make an exorcism," Lily admitted as she leaned back comfortably against her chair, distractedly looking around and spotting the little changes the place had made since the last time she was there. His eyes followed her actions, finding curious how open she was about her job once he had admitted that he knew about said world. "A group of high-school students attracted the attention of a demon through what they thought was simply a silly game on a Ouija board."
"On this place?" Loki raised his eyebrows. He leaned unconsciously towards her, interested in the story she had begun to tell him. "They used a Ouija board in public?"
She nodded, having shared his exasperation at that detail. "None of them knew what they were doing, and in the end, they dragged a lot of people into their mess. The demon possessed one of them and refused to leave the body even after I casted several exorcisms, then it wouldn't allow anyone inside this restaurant to leave. A lot of people were possessed, others ruthlessly killed. Basically, the usual when it comes to demons."
"How did you deal with it?" Loki inquired, imagining that it must've been a powerful demon if it reacted so violently to the presence of a hunter.
"I had help from the kids that summoned it in the first place. I doused the creature with holy water while all of the hostages chanted the exorcism alongside me."
A waitress approached them to take their order, recognizing the blonde woman almost immediately. Last time she had been there, she'd looked younger and, in a way, healthier, but after all she had done to help the workers of Petal's cafe, there was no mistaking her.
"Welcome back," The waitress said warmly, smiling sweetly at her. "It's good to see you back under better circumstances. I'm here to take your orders as soon as you feel ready."
"Thank you," Lily returned the warm smile, remembering how frightened the young woman in front of her had been that awful day of the exorcism. "I think we're ready to order. Loki?"
And once their order had been taken, the waitress told them that their order was on the house. Before they could protest, she added: "Direct orders from the boss. We appreciate how much you helped us, miss. Our doors will always be open for you and your husband."
Loki seemed amused by those words, though Lily couldn't disguise how flustered those words had left her.
"Thank you," The blond man nodded politely at the waitress.
Once she left with their orders, he turned back to the blushing woman and fondly observed her. He wondered what had made her feel so flustered, if it was the fact that someone had openly thanked her for her job as a hunter, or if it was the implication of them being married.
Either way, such a raw portrayal of emotions made the former angel appreciate her more; in heaven everyone was a machine with no emotions, everything was done in a stoic manner. He found refreshing how emotional humans were, it was what he most liked about them.
He extended one hand over the table and briefly touched her left hand, a warm feeling crossing both of them once they made direct contact with each other in that way.
It felt like an intimate contact, which scared the blonde woman more than she would've liked to admit, but that felt suitable at the moment.
"You wanted to talk about last night," Loki conceded, slowly retreating his hand from her own. "Let's talk."
Lily felt uncomfortable even talking about it, the unknown presence having rattled her nerves since the first time she felt it follow her. The amount of power and danger it emanated unnerved her- it felt familiar in a way she couldn't understand, and that frightened her to no end.
At last, she said: "I want to know what the creature following me is. I know I said I would trust you to take care of this, but I would like to be prepared just in case things don't go as planned."
There was nothing more frustrating than wanting to assure her that he would never allow a creature of the such to harm her in any way but not being able to voice those words out-loud without revealing what his real duty was. Her protection was his main concern, he wouldn't allow anything to directly hurt her; even if he had to break several more rules to protect her, he would.
"I'll take care of it," Loki promised carefully, threading through the thin line of being sincere and evasive at the same time. "You don't need to worry about it."
Lily's head pounded, her never-ending headache making a reappearance. Truth was, while she appreciated his concern, her patience was wearing short. "I'm capable of defending myself, Loki, thank you for your concern, but this is something that involves me directly. I deserve to know what is following me around and what does it want."
There it was, the fierceness that characterized the Winchester siblings so well.
He chuckled halfheartedly. He had watched her survive against all odds, he was perfectly aware of the fact that she- and her brothers- were perfectly capable of protecting themselves. It didn't appease his protective side, though.
"I know that you are, sweetheart. It's just that there are things you shouldn't have to deal with on your own. And this thing following you?" Disgust crossed his features, a dark emotion passing through his eyes. "It's something no human should ever come into contact with."
"I don't like people fighting my battles for me," Lily moved to lean against her chair, putting a little distance between them. "If you want to help me deal with this, you can, but we do this together. The thing wants me, not you."
Loki groaned, the first glance of annoyance crossing his features. "Could you be more stubborn?"
She took it as a compliment, merely shrugging as she held her stance.
"Fine," He conceded at last, rolling his eyes. "We'll deal with this together."
He had nothing against fighting alongside her, in other circumstances he would've found it ideal for them to reach that amount of trust with one another, but there were two things that worried him. First, he worried about her safety around the creature stalking her, and secondly, she could realize he wasn't even a Trickster if they encountered the creature together; it would recognize him as the archangel that he was, just as he could recognize the monster for the hideous abomination that it was.
"But, perhaps, not today?" Lily offered him a sheepish look.
Finding and murdering the Trickster terrorizing campus was her top priority at the moment. Then, once the people around campus were safe, she could deal with whatever creature had taken an uncanny interest in her.
Loki felt relieved by those words, a soft look crossing his features. He agreed, "Not today."
Unknown to the blonde woman, Dean had texted her a message almost an hour before that moment, which remained unread on her jacket-pocket.
We found the evidence you needed, the janitor is our Trickster. Get your ass back to the motel now, we're getting ready to hunt him down tonight.
And there was another message from an unknown number. Your brothers told me you don't want to see me. I know I hurt you, but please, there's something wrong going on right now and I need you here. There's something in my house. I don't know what it is, I don't know what it wants, but please. Please, Lily, help me.
The blonde woman had been distracted enough not to notice those messages, but once she did, it was too late to help her ex-fiancé. Her brothers, however, remained waiting for her to arrive at the motel so that they could strike at the Trickster together as a team.