58. "You don't have to say anything."

Pairing: Raven and Wally (Kid Flash/The Flash)

Setting: Comics / College AU

Age: 25-28

This is a continuation of "79. I'll still be here when you're ready".

"Just make sure you don't forget about lil' ol' me." He had let out a laugh and finger-gunned her as he backed out of the room. Her beautiful smile between the glimmering tears in the corners of her eyes was the last thing he saw, her cute little laugh still echoed in his head. But the immense pain in his chest still lingered, too.

He remembered everything, like it had happened yesterday, how he broke down on the floor as soon as he had reached his own dorm room, not really wanting to risk her finding him like that in the hallway. It had been the longest walk he'd ever had to take in his life, acting like his entire being hadn't just been completely shattered into millions of pieces.

It was the best for her, he always told himself. She'd worked so hard, she deserved this opportunity. And yet, it never truly lessened the pain. They say that time heals all wounds. Bullshit. When your heart gets ripped out of your chest like that, it may get put back into place, but it's never the same as it was before and the scars remain there as a constant reminder.

In the beginning just hearing her voice on the other end of the line, seeing her face on the other side of the screen seemed like it was enough. Enough to calm his aching heart and just put a smile on his face. But eventually the inevitable happened. The calls got rarer, the conversations became shorter, they grew further away from each other. These were the things he'd been most afraid of. Yet, he expected it. Although it didn't make it any easier.

Before he even realized, they lived their own lives. Everything was so different. It felt different. Even between the occasional happy birthdays and remember whens. His heart skipped every time he took his phone and saw her name in his notifications. And all he could ever do was to wonder if her heart skipped the same way… But he never asked. How could he? Everything in her life seemed so perfect, even without him. How could he ruin that? Some days he felt like a coward because of that. No. Most days. Every day. Because he was a coward.

But there were good days too. When he convinced himself that he just had to have a little bit more faith, both in himself and her. That silent promise they made back then wasn't for nothing. It meant something. And he meant what he said - he'd be there for when she was ready. He was willing to wait for her for the rest of his life as long as there was even the slightest bit of hope for them. All he needed was just patience.

Those were the good days. The days when he could bring himself to be optimistic. Not that he ever lost that trait in front of his friends. For them, he was still the good ol' Wally, the life of the party and the forever smiling redhead. But most of them weren't that good… Especially when he was left on his own, at nights when the darkness crept not only into his room, but his heart and mind as well.

And so the days went by.

One by one.

Agonizingly slowly.

"Oh my god, what are you doing here?"

It was Wally's birthday and, of course, Dick had to throw a big party for him. So many people arrived, even those who he went to college with. They'd graduated only last year, but it seemed like it'd been ages.

"I didn't know you were in town, it's great to see you!"

It was nice catching up with some of the people he hadn't seen since graduation. A bright smile was on his face, like always, and he truly was happy to see everyone, but somehow his mind kept wandering off to other places…

"Is that really you? Wow, it's been so long!"

Not like he'd ever had the greatest attention span anyway. But it was especially on occasions like this when he was surrounded by so many people that he felt the ache in his chest the most.

"You're here! Come on, let's go find Wally!"

His eyes couldn't help but wander around the room in a naive hope that he'll see those familiar eyes, the dark hair, the enticing smile. However, even then, he did it so mindlessly that he hadn't fully registered the commotion taking place just on the other end of the room. Everyone had flocked around someone who'd just arrived and, well, he just presumed it was yet another of his college friends. Many of these people hadn't seen one another in a while after all, so he didn't exactly pay much attention to it. That was until the crowd scattered and Dick emerged with someone by his side.

A petite form in a black dress. Delicate fingers clenching onto a single rose. Piercing blue eyes focused solely on said rose as if afraid of what they might see if they looked up. Black raven hair barely reaching down to the jawline. Lips pressed tightly together in anticipation. Everything about this sight was just nerve-wracking.

With each step they took, Wally's heart started beating faster. Or slower, he couldn't tell because eventually it was beating either so fast or so slow that he felt like it just stopped. Maybe it did stop. Again, he couldn't tell. For all he knew, he might have lost consciousness at one point because he got himself together (barely) when the two were already standing right in front of him. The blue eyes suddenly shifting up towards him made him finally snap out of it.

"Rae- Raven, hey- Hi. Um… It's uh… great to see you. Um- Thank you for coming." The poor boy tried his best to muster complete sentences together, laughing nervously. "How did you know-?"

"Richard invited me." Raven answered right away and motioned towards the man in question, who was already leaving the scene with a "you're welcome" smile plastered on his face. Calm. Straightforward. Not even the smallest hiccup in her voice. He wouldn't expect any less of her.

"O-oh." He looked towards Dick and shook his head. But not because of disapproval. It was more of disbelief that he'd actually gotten her to come. "So," the green eyes turned back to her once more, "you came all the way down here just for my birthday?" He couldn't help but let out another nervous chuckle.

"No." She smiled and held a small pause before continuing. "It's not your birthday I came here for."

But it only confused him more. A part of him already went through all the bad scenarios that might have happened that brought her here - a death in the family, her house in England burning down, a family member falling ill and having no one else to care for them and so on. He wanted to inquire, but the girl had extended the rose towards him and his train of thoughts shifted completely.

"Oh, let's go find a vase for that." After realizing that neither Dick nor Alfred were anywhere in sight, they were on their way to the kitchen to hopefully find something on their own, followed by a number of curious eyes that they somehow paid absolutely no attention to.

"So," Wally started again as they walked, wanting to ask why she was here then, but decided to avoid that question for now and instead go for something lighthearted, "you've cut your hair."

"Helps me keep it out of the way." She nodded and smiled lightly. "And maintaining is easier."

"Yeah, I bet it is." They both chuckled and a silence broke between them for a moment. It was almost awkward. And Wally wanted this to be anything but awkward.

"It looks good." He finally spoke up with a brighter, much more confident smile. And received a smile in return.

"Thank you."

But the return of the silence was inevitable. So many things were unsaid between them, so many moments in their life they wanted to share, so many apologies that it was all too overwhelming and resulted in complete inability to speak. The tension was there, neither of them could deny it even if they wanted to.

Eventually, he gathered to courage to say something when they were already in the kitchen and he was searching for a vase in the cupboards.

"Rae, do you mind if I ask?" He looked over to her who gave him a nod of approval and he took a deep breath before asking. "Why did you come back? Are you- Is it just temporary or…?"

"It's-" She bit her lip, trying to put her thoughts into words. "No. It's not temporary." At those words Wally's heart skipped a beat.

"Really?" He looked back at her in surprise.

"Yes." She nodded. "I had a good job and a nice house back in England, going to work every day felt like I made a difference in the world and everyone was just so nice there, but- I… I miss home. Everything I know and love is here and I- I just miss it." Raven shrugged, fighting back a tear forming in her eyes.

"And, well," she continued, gazing down at the rose still in her hand, "I miss you. And coming here… I didn't know if you ever-"

"I missed you every day of my life, Rae." Wally quickly intervened and stepped closer to her. He wanted her to have absolutely no doubts about the fact that he had her in his thoughts day in and day out. And with that, she looked at him with the saddest eyes he'd ever seen from her.

"I'm sorry." She barely managed to breath out.

"For what?" He laughed softly and reached to wipe a tear from the corner of her eye.

"For leaving. For not visiting often enough. For not keeping in touch. For- I don't know. There's so much I have to apologize to you for, Wallace." Raven desperately tried to explain, but he only smiled at her.

"You don't have to apologize for any of that. How could I ever hold it against you for wanting a better life, a better future for yourself? I already told you - you deserve only the best." He gave her a reassuring smile, but it didn't seem to convince her enough.

"But I've caused so much pain. I have so much to explain-"

"No no no. Raven. No." He stopped her and took the rose from her hand to put it on the counter so he could hold her hands. "You don't have to say anything."

"But-"

"Just tell me you're ready. To start it all over again. To have a new beginning. A new, a better ending." Wally held her hands tight and pressed them against his chest, waiting patiently for her answer as they gazed into each other's eyes. The moment of silence seemed to drag on forever. The anticipation was driving him crazy. What if she said no? What if she still didn't believe it could work out between them? But what if she did? What would his plan then be? Oh, so many questions running through his mind.

"Master West." A male voice suddenly broke the silence between them and both of them jolted apart from each other. "May I help you with anything?" They both looked over to see Alfred standing in the door with a tray of empty glasses.

"Ah. Alfred." Wally breathed in trying to calm his beating heart. "Yeah, um… We were just… Ah, trying to find a vase for the rose." He explained and gestured towards the flower, which Raven took in her hand and extended towards the butler as proof.

"I see. Well, let me take care of that for you." There might have been the tiniest of smiles on his face as he walked further and took the flower. "Miss Roth. Very nice to see you again."

"Thank you, Alfred. It's great to see you too." Raven smiled at the man before being taken by the hand by Wally who lead her out of the kitchen. Once they were out, they both giggled like school kids who'd been caught making out by a teacher.

After their little laughing fit, however, she still kept holding onto his hand despite him loosening the grip to let her go, earning a look of surprise from the other as he raised his eyebrow at her.

"I'm ready." She finally said with a smile and he could instantly feel his heart burst out of joy. He could barely hold it in at this point, so he just laughed out in happiness and wrapped his arms around her, lifting her up in the air and twirling around for a second or two.

"I'm so happy!" Wally laughed out and finally put her on the ground. "Thank you."

"No, thank you. For waiting on me all these years." She spoke softly and rested her hands on his shoulders. A moment of silence fell between them once again, but this time it was filled with joy and love. So much love. So he used this chance to lean down to her and gently press his lips against her.

"Wally!" Of course someone had to interrupt. Dick's voice echoed through the hallway as he stood at the other end of it, having finally found the redhead. "The cake's ready to-"

But Wally didn't even look at him, just gave him the good ol' talk-to-the-hand treatment and continued from where he left off.

"No one's gonna ruin this moment." They both chuckled as their arms wrapped around each other and lips locked in a long overdue kiss with so much passion that Dick even got embarrassed just standing there.

Sometimes there are more important things in life than cake.