It was nice, Clary had to admit, being with Sebastian. He was sweet, kind of boring, and liked to hold hands a lot. But he was nice to her, easy breezy, and didn't ask her too much. Like why she was always at Izzy's house, or where her mother was. Easy breezy. Sometimes.

"What are we doing this weekend?" Sebastian asked the group at lunch; it had been a few weeks since Isabelle's party, since they had gotten together, and it seemed like finally the gossip about the pair had died down.

"I don't mind… Isn't there an open mic on at the coffee house?" Isabelle said carefully.

"Coffee?" Clary said happily, and everyone laughed.

"I guess that's decided…" Maia said. "I haven't been to a gig in so long; we could go to Pandemonium after?" She asked, and Izzy groaned, shooting Clary a dark look.

"My fake got confiscated last time, I am not going back in there." She said dubiously, and Clary laughed.

"I'll come home with you after instead." She said, and Izzy grinned.

"So, you aren't coming home with me?" Sebastian whispered in her ear, and Clary blushed hard, trying to look away.

"We're at school Seb," She whispered back, grabbing the hand that Sebastian was trailing up her jean clad leg. "Cool it."

She felt him huff beside her, but focussed on the conversation at hand, trying to ignore his palming. It was only now, when she had him, that she realised Sebastian wasn't exactly a dream guy. He wasn't bad- he just seemed so absorbed in himself it was sickening. Especially in bed. But he was hot, and popular, so she could stick it out. It was senior year after all. She just needed to get through this year, then she was gone.

"There's a friendly match with Xavier's tonight so I'll be sticking around after school- is cheer practice on? I can give you and Iz a ride." Meliorn asked Clary, and she nodded.

"I didn't realise there was a friendly match though- how come?"

"They want a taste of the state champions." Sebastian jeered, and fist bumped Meliorn. Clary rolled her eyes.

"Sure. Just don't get in our way. Iz and I are ramping up practice now ready for nationals."

"Oh god." Maia groaned, putting her head on the table.

"Hey- you love it." Isabelle said, and Clary laughed, trying to hide her worry. As the bell rang for class, she let Sebastian peck her on the cheek then made her way out the back of the cafeteria with Izzy; they spent most of their week avoiding both homeroom and trig, and so they waited behind the bleachers until school ended and they could start practice. Isabelle sat on the dusty ground, braiding her hair, and they shared a crumpled cigarette from the bottom of Clary's bag.

"Seb seems very touchy- feely." Isabelle said carefully, and Clary shrugged, doodling on her thigh.

"I guess… he's always been like that."

"Do you not like him?"

Clary looked up, frowning, picking at the hem of her jeans.

"No, I do like him. He's just…"

"What?"

"He's just… Seb."

Isabelle laughed, passing her the cigarette.

"You mean he's dull." Clary rolled her eyes. She knew that she could never have what she wanted, could never say what she was really feeling. But she needed Seb, to make sure people knew that she had status, so she wasn't going to give him up because of something as stupid as her 'feelings'.

"I just need him. And he likes me, so…"

"So, whatever?" Isabelle replied, and Clary nodded sullenly, taking a drag. "I get that… with Mel. He's not exactly the most interesting guy- all he ever wants to do is have me watch his games. And now the season is over, so…"

"You'll have nothing to talk about."

"To be honest, sometimes not talking is much more fun." She laughed, and Clary rolled her eyes, stomping out her cigarette butt and standing up. They changed into their uniform hastily behind the bleachers- no longer caring who saw them- and sat watching the football team warm up as they waited for their team to arrive.

Clary didn't much like watching football, even if she was a cheerleader, but the energy she felt when everyone was screaming, cheering, was the best high she had ever had. The rest of the squad slowly filtered out onto the field, and Clary watched as the team from St Xavier's arrived and began to warm up, shaking hands with the Alicante team while the coaches made small talk.

Clary turned to Isabelle, ready to start their warmup, but instead noticed the glazed look on her best friend's face. She followed her gaze out onto the field and frowned, not seeing what could be capturing her attention, considering Mel was just drinking from his bottle of water.

"Iz?" She asked, poking her friend, and Isabelle turned to her.

"Huh? Oh, everyone's here." She stood up, brushing down her skirt and trying not to catch Clary's eye; her friend just frowned, following behind. "Okay guys, let's get started; pair up everyone! We're doing killers."

Everyone groaned, pairing off and starting their sprints along the edge of the field; the teams had already started playing, and considering it was a friendly there were very few people in the stadiums, only a couple of girlfriends and some giggling freshmen. The lack of cheering made the game seem less surreal, and the shouting of the players filtered over to them.

Practice went smoothly, and Clary was exhausted by the time they had finished. She was dripping in sweat, hair wild around her face, and everyone looked equally exhausted. As they packed up the game still raged on, the match seemingly less amiable than when it had started, and Clary could barely see Sebastian's number, a darting figure across the huge field.

"Are you staying with me tonight?" Isabelle asked, and Clary shook her head.

"I'm good- Dad went off on a business trip last night so I can stay at mine; did you want to stay over?" Clary asked, grabbing her bag.

"Nah, I'm going to hang out with Alec I think, I haven't seen him in a while." Isabelle sighed, and Clary smiled sympathetically. The Lightwood siblings no longer lived together- Alec lived with Robert and went to school in a different district; Isabelle had stayed with her mom in the wake of her little brother's death, and that meant that- although the house was often full of people- it was a lonely place.

"Okay- tell him I miss him." Clary said, and Isabelle grinned, bumping her army lightly. Izzy's eyes strayed to the field once again, staring- most likely at Meliorn- intently. "Imma grab my bag from my locker and then just walk home, so I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah- I'll pick you up for the gig, okay? Don't let Seb take you- and bring clothes because you are definitely staying at mine after."

"Yeah, yeah- tell Mel thanks for the offer!" Clary said, wandering off in the opposite direction, leaving the sound of her friends' shouting in the distance.

She made her way quickly to her locker, not liking the dark halls after hours, and grabbed her bag. Even through she loved her mom, she spent barely any time with her- and if she was being honest her home didn't really feel like her home. She always had a bag packed in her locker ready to stay at either Izzy's or Maia's- or sometimes Magnus', who lived alone in an apartment owned by his uncle. But today she was taking her bag to her own home; her mom probably wouldn't be around, and for once she would be able to get a moment of peace away from everyone. Away from pretending to be something she wasn't.

She closed her locker and hiked her bag on her shoulder, dreaming of the bath that she planned to take. She didn't have her car with her, but there was still the last glimmer of sun in the sky, so she was happy to make it home on her own.

It was only when she got out the back gates, and smelled the distinct smell of skunk, that she knew she wasn't out in the clear yet. She glanced around the bushes, and made no sign of surprise at Jace, who was propped up by a streetlamp, watching her approach. Everything about him told her to go the other way, to ignore the fading smile and the air of danger. But she couldn't.

He watched her approach silently, brown eyes burned gold in the fading sun, and Clary could feel her cheeks heat. She tried to adjust her skirt so maybe not so much of her legs were showing, but the smirk on his face told her she needn't have bothered.

"What are you doing here?" She asked carefully, and he grinned wider.

"Good to see you too, Red. How was the party?"

Clary felt her cheeks heat, and all of a sudden, he wasn't smiling quite so wide. He pushed himself off the streetlamp and approached her, face hard.

"I'm waiting for Lewis. He's on the Xavier team, you know. Facing off against your boy toy."

Clary huffed, hand on hip.

"He is not my 'boy toy', not that it matters to you." She scoffed, hating the way he watched her. He raised an eyebrow. "I need to go."

"Don't leave on my account. Stay… ogle the team- I know your friend likes to." He spat, and Clary glared at him.

"The hell is that supposed to mean?" She asked.

"Lightwood. Next time we're here, ask her who she's staring at." He spat, and Clary glared harder.

"Her boyfriend is on the team, asshat."

"Yeah… boyfriends."

Clary shook her head, feeling the headache forming.

"Whatever, I don't have time for this."

She turned and walked away, feeling the chill of the night settle around her and the final drops of sun scatter away. He was saying something to her as she left, but she no longer felt like listening. If there was one thing she knew to do, it was stay away from Jace Herondale.

….

"I hate this colour." Clary said of the dress she was wearing, twirling in front of Isabelle and Maia.

"You hate blue? Since when!" Isabelle asked, flicking through her closet.

"What do you mean, since when? Since always, Iz, you freak." Clary said, pulling off the dress as Maia giggled, applying makeup at Isabelle's vanity. "I'm just going to wear my jeans." Clary said, standing in her underwear, eyeing up her jeans and sweater.

"Oh, hell no. You are not; this is the last night we're going to be able to go out for ages, we have nationals so soon!"

"Hey, I'm only coming for the coffee, I'm not going to Pandemonium after; me and you are having a quiet night, right? Then I'm working every night next week- Luke's sister is ill." Clary said, pulling on a sweater, only to have her hands slapped at by Isabelle, who tossed her another dress, this time bright red.

"Oh, hell no."

"Put it on, sis, or you're wearing the blue."

Clary huffed, turning the shimmering piece of fabric over in her hand.

"Can't I just wear the black one? The one I wore to Aline's party?" Clary said, chucking away the red dress and moving to Isabelle's huge closet. Her parents were both extremely wealthy, and exchanged emotional presence for material possessions. Clary was well aware of their type, since her parents were the same.

"Mmm… actually, yeah, wear the black one. I like that on you."

Clary smiled, pulling the dress from her friend's closet and slipping it on, hastily throwing on a jacket to cover up, then throwing herself down on the huge bed. She watched her two friends do their makeup, Isabelle curling her hair in one of the many mirrors she possessed.

"How was your mom yesterday?" Isabelle asked, a look of deft concentration on her face, and Maia met Clary's eyes in the mirror.

"She wasn't actually in… the whole night… or morning…" Clary said, looking down at her nails.

"Scandal!" Maia said, swiftly ducking at the pillow Clary threw. She and Isabelle laughed, Clary rolling her eyes.

"You mean the great Lady Fray was absent, yet again? What a shocker." Isabelle said.

"Yeah, yeah, alert the media. I didn't think that she would be home but… all night? I literally haven't seen her in weeks."

"Maybe you should alert the media then."

"Nah, I'll just wait until she remembers that I exist."

The doorbell rang, and Isabelle shot Clary a telling look.

"What? You want me to get it?"

"Thanks, darling." Isabelle replied, shooting her a grin. Clary mumbled her complaints as she got up, ready to ascend the million stairs. She hopped down the hallway, knowing that no one was home, as no one ever was, and opened the front door.

"Hey, little red!" Magnus greeted her at the door, wrapping her in a glittery hug, Clary blowing pieces of highlight away from her face.

"Mags, you're early. You know Alec left yesterday, right?" Clary teased, and Magnus grinned slyly.

"Oh, you know I've given up on that private school pet- for now. Anyway, I'm just here because Meliorn refused to give me a ride to the gig, so I'm going to walk with my girls."

Clary frowned, pulling at the hem of her dress, then crossed her arms.

"He wouldn't give you a ride? Why not?"

The look that crossed over Magnus' face was answer enough, and Clary could feel the blood beneath her skin boil. Magnus was one of her oldest friends; she had lived in his neighbourhood, or he in hers, before he had come out to his parents and been banished from their echelon. He was a child of a certain echelon of people, like she was, and understood the pressures. He understood what it was like to have absent parents, to be on the inside looking out. And despite the fact that he had his own struggles, he had always been there for her.

"He wouldn't let you in his car because you're gay? That fucking piece of shit, when I tell Iz—"

Clary was cut off by Magnus putting a hand over her mouth and stooping down, closing the door swiftly with his other hand and pulling Clary toward the kitchen, away from the staircase and Isabelle's earshot.

"Cee, my darling, keep your mouth shut about this. The last thing I want after this humiliation is to hurt Isabelle, especially if that Neanderthal makes her happy." He whispered carefully, and Clary removed the hand from her mouth gently.

"That's just the thing, Mags, she doesn't like him that much, especially not if she knew about this!" She hissed back, and Magnus just shook his head.

"The one thing I don't want is more trouble, doll. And shit stirring in my last year of the hell that is high school is my one way ticket to ass-beat city. Just let him be, I wouldn't want to associate myself with him further anyway."

Clary sighed, pulling her friend into a hug as best she could with the elaborate coat he was wearing.

"I hate when people treat you like this. You deserved the moon, not some shit eating homophobes who are stuck in the 1950's."

"Yeah, yeah." He pulled out of the hug and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, leading them back to the front door. "The thing is this isn't a 1950's way of thinking, its just a way of thinking. People do this, and they always will. I've stopped caring."

She could tell by his voice that he did care, a lot, but she didn't push. It wasn't her place too, and if she knew one thing it was that Magnus needed to be left to make his own decisions.

It was at that point that Isabelle and Maia thundered down the stairs, giggling at something and smelling strongly of Chanel no. 5. Clary met Magnus' stern look with a resigned smile, and the pair joined their friends, Clary shoving her feet into her shoes before allowing herself to be pulled out of the door as Maia lit up a cigarette and Isabelle opened up a bottle of something she shouldn't have.

…

As it turned out, gigs at coffee houses weren't exactly the kind of party that entertained people like Sebastian for long, and after the first band had played only half a song he had rolled his eyes, and he and his crew, including Mel and Raphael, left the small café and headed to the nearby club Pandemonium, which had a reputation for letting anyone in- especially before 10 pm. Clary, Isabelle and Maia all stayed, along with the loyal Jordan and Magnus, who was eyeing up the bearded barista. Aline and Seelie had also decided to leave with the boys, a decision that was met with an eye roll by Isabelle. Aline and Seelie both had a reputation, and despite the fact that they were both loyal enough members of the cheer squad, neither of them was particularly warm to Isabelle, or Clary.

"Okay, I'm getting more coffee!" Clary said, standing up from the plush seat she had sunk into, somewhat drunk from whatever Isabelle was spiking their drinks with, and everyone laughed at her enthusiasm. "Anyone want anything?" She asked, being met with a chorus of 'no's', instead getting up herself as the music died down and the next band set up, ordering herself the largest americano that they offered. She tried her best not to spill any on Isabelle's dress as she made her way back to her seat and found herself surprised by how many people had arrived. Her seat had been taken, dragged away by someone who had joined their friends, so she instead carefully placed her drink on their table and perched herself on Isabelle's lap.

"What's going on?" She asked the group, accepting the bottle of vodka from Isabelle and taking a swig.

"I don't know, I think this band that's setting up is super popular around here or something, everyone just arrived." Jordan said, his arm around Maia's shoulder. Clary shrugged, leaning back into Isabelle, who seemed distracted.

"You tired, Belle?" Clary asked, looking to her friend. Her eyes were glued to the stage, lazily following the band that was currently setting up on stage in the dim lights. She nodded absently, acknowledging the question, but refusing to look away from the stage. Clary turned curiously, watching as the harsh spotlight lit up the small coffee shop, and three people were illuminated by the light. It was juts three guys, hair dishevelled, skin pale as though they spent most of their time indoors. They looked nothing special. But it was when the front man stepped back on stage from checking the amps that Clary realised what Isabelle was staring at.

Simon Lewis.

She sucked in a breath, not hearing as the tall boy introduced his band and they began to play their first song. Isabelle was transfixed, mouthing the words to their first song as though she had heard it a hundred times. And Clary finally realised what Isabelle had been staring at during the St. Xaviers match.

Clary knew Simon. She and him had run into each other on multiple occasions, because of one person.

Eight Months Earlier.

…

The music thrummed, the air filled with electricity and desperation as Clary made her way through the club, her mind set only on one thing.

"Camille!" She shouted over the music, her eyes being met with the sight of an old friend, the kind of friend who provides you with any pill you like, as long as you could pay. The kind of friend you didn't tell your parents about.

"Hey, sweet thing. You here alone?"

Clary rubbed at the back of her neck, feeling the raised bump that lay at the base of her head. She needed to forget.

"Yeah… I just need something… anything to help me…"

"Stop feeling?" Camille asked, and Clary nodded, leaning against the wall that Camille was stood against. The blonde woman looked the girl in the eyes, knowing full well the kind of pain that she was in. She stroked her hair gently, then slipped her hand into Clary's, exchanging the notes that were there for a small bag. Clary sighed, mouthing a silent thank you before moving past her and heading back out of Pandemonium.

"Ey, watch it."

Clary felt a harsh push as she exited the club and fell to the ground hard. She hadn't seen who had pushed her- but she did see the guy who came out of nowhere, and swiftly punched him squarely in the face.

"Hey, fucking cool it man!" Simon shouted at his friend, pulling him off of the club goer and holding him back. Jace shook off his friend and turned to Clary, who cringed, seeing distinctly the look of anger on his face. She took the hand he was offering to her, letting herself be pulled from the ground, when she saw the threatening look dissipate, instead left with a tempered look of concern.

"You okay?"

Clary looked up into the eyes of the stranger; burning gold, unlike anything she had ever seen.

"Yeah…" She slurred, well aware of the hand he kept on her arm. He smiled slightly, then glanced at her arm and frowned.

"You're hurt." He said, inspecting the trail of bruises along her arm. She pulled out of his grip, covering her up with her other hand.

"That wasn't him. I've got to go."

She turned away, ready to make her way home through the cool night air as she shoved the small bag into her bra. She was again by a hand on her arm.

"Look, wait up."

Clary sighed, turning back, and for the first time heard the name that would ruin her.

"I'm Jace."

…..

The Present.

Clary snapped out of her reverie and stared up at the familiar face. Simon was a tall guy, pale like his friends with chestnut coloured hair and pale brown eyes that were perpetually sympathetic. He wasn't like some of the guys that ran with the down town crew. He was kind of normal, although his singing left a lot to be desired.

She glanced at her best friend again, seeing the way she was seeing Lewis. Then she leapt from her seat and made her way out the door, not looking back.

"Clary?" She heard her friend's call, but didn't stop until she was out in the dim lights of the street, the air finally hitting her and the slam of the door leaving her alone in the night. She heard the door open again, and she pulled her jacket tighter around her as she faced Isabelle.

"How did you know?" Isabelle asked, rubbing her bare arms. Clary scoffed.

"I know you better than I know myself, Iz, and you could barely keep your eyes off him. And the other night at the football match? I know he was there. And I know you were watching him then too."

Isabelle looked down at her hands, and Clary shook her head.

"How long?" Clary asked, and Isabelle shrugged.

"Not long… it just… it just happened." She replied. Clary scoffed.

"It just happened? It just fucking happened, what the hell happened to 'staying away from downworlders?" Izzy cringed at the nickname, but Clary kept going. "You've been telling me for four months that we need to steer clear of people like them, and then you do this? What the hell is up with you, Iz? What about Meliorn?" She continued, knowing it was wrong to throw these things at her best friend, but the feeling of betrayal being too strong to stop her.

Isabelle laughed bitterly.

"This is different, Clary. You know Mel is an idiot, Simon is different, he's not like..."

"Like Jace? Say it, Lightwood, if you're going to insult me and my choices make sure you go all the way."

Isabelle though her bag to the ground in anger and stepped toward Clary in anger, towering over her friend.

"Actually Clary, yes. He's not like Jace; don't get pissy at me because of that scumbag- he hurt you. He made you miserable, and you are so much better than him. I won't apologise for insulting that piece of shit, because he hurt you. Okay, he fucking hurt you, and I could kill him for it. And I know that Simon could never."

She breathed heavily, and Clary felt her anger begin to dissipate. She sunk down to the curb and sat with her legs in the street, pulling out a cigarette.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked, and Isabelle sat down and joined her, taking the cigarette and pulling a deep breath.

"I don't know… I was ashamed. I thought you'd take Mel's side, because he's one of them, and I know that you wouldn't approve, not after everything I put you through with Herondale. I just wanted to keep it to myself. Then I know I'm not hurting anyone."

Clary nodded, taking a drag of the cigarette.

"You can tell me anything. I love you, no matter what." Clary muttered, and Isabelle laced their fingers carefully. "Besides, Meliorn is a piece of shit anyway. And I never minded Simon. He's okay."

"For a downworlder?" Isabelle smiled, and Clary rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, for a downworlder."

They were silent for a minute, the sound of the band inside like chattering voiced above water, Clary and Isabelle deep underwater. Isabelle looked at their intertwined palms.

"I met up with him on Max's birthday. I told you I was staying with Dad, but really I just went to Alto's and drank all morning. His band was playing. He was nice to me."

Clary sucked in a breath; Max's birthday was a hard day for everyone who had known him. He had died only four years ago, and every year Isabelle seemed to struggle more. It had been two months

"Oh Iz." She whispered, holding her friend tighter.

"His dad died when he was a kid. We talked for ages, and he got me, and then when I had cried enough and we had drank enough he let me crash at his place. God, I was a fucking mess, Clare, and he just played me his stupid songs and told me all these stories. He makes me feel safe, like I don't have to be Isabelle Lightwood, cheer captain every fucking second. I can breathe when I'm with him."

Clary sighed, resting her head on Isabelle's shoulder.

"What will you tell people?" She asked, and Isabelle turned to face her.

"You can't tell anyone, Clary. I can't tell anyone."

Clary furrowed her brows.

"Why not?"

"He's one of them! You know what people would say, what my mom would say… I can't say anything. I'm going to keep pretending to be Miss Perfect, I'm going to keep being Meliorn's doormat, and then I'm going to graduate and never see any of those judgemental idiots again."

"Iz… you can't just keep stringing people along. That sounds fucking exhausting."

Isabelle laughed, running a hand through her hair.

"We have to play the game Clary. Be on our best behaviour- you know that better than anyone."

Clary grimace. She did know that; in a world where everyone was constantly watching, waiting to dig something up on you that could ruin your life, you had to play the part.

"Okay. Fine. But you need to be careful."

"I know. We are."

"No, seriously Iz. Because Jace knows, and if he does that means that he can tell anyone that he likes."

Isabelle froze.

"When did you see Jace?" She asked, slightly panicked by the thought of her friend interacting with him, and Clary blanched.

"Not like that… He was hanging around after the match, and he said he knew you were looking for Lewis."

"Yeah, well Herondale can run his mouth as much as he likes. I hope he knows that if he tries anything, he's fucking dead."

"Amen, sister." Clary said, and Isabelle laughed, putting out the cigarette and wrapping both arms around Clary.

"Not long, Clare. We just have to keep pretending a little longer, and then we're out of here. Just me and you."

…..

Clary spent the next week working her hardest to try not to think about Isabelle and Simon; it wasn't that she wasn't happy that her best friend was happy, it was just that now she had to balance pretending not to hate Meliorn, pretending that Sebastian even mattered to her, and trying not to think about Jace Herondale. She gave it her all at practice every night, then worked until one in the morning at the bookstore, counting and recounting the stock. Her boss, Luke, seemed to be working less and less, so she was often alone in the shop, smoking out the back window and facetiming Magnus.

Isabelle knew that Clary was struggling, so she too tried to distract her as best she could.

"Please, please stay with me tonight, doll. Maia and Magnus are coming to mine for a movie night, it won't be right without you. Who will make sarcastic comments about the dumb blonde with Magnus?" Isabelle pleaded over lunch. They were sat outside, the last nice days before winter keeping them warm, and Sebastian was engaged in a conversation with Meliorn, his arm like a vice around Clary's waist.

"I'd like to, Iz, but I'm working again. Luke has plans so I said I'd watch the shop."

Isabelle sighed, picking at her salad.

"How about, I pick you up from work and bring you to mine. You can stay the whole weekend. I'll invite Alec!" She said before Clary could say no, and Clary laughed.

"Okay, okay… But I'll need to make a quick stop at home though- I'm running out of clothes at your place." Clary said, and Isabelle grinned.

"Of course, Cherry."

"So when are you going to stay at my place…" Sebastian whispered in her ear, and Clary blanched, embarrassed at the way he constantly made suggestions in front of everyone that they knew.

"Seb, can we go for a walk?" She said, and Sebastian got up, slipping his hand into hers and pulling her from the table.

"Thought you'd never ask." He said as he pulled her along, and Clary shot Isabelle a tired look, her friends laughing at their retreating forms.

"Hey, slow down!" Clary said as Sebastian pulled her down the hallway. "Where are we going? I wanted to just walk around." Clary said, and Sebastian quickly pulled her into a janitor's cupboard, enrobing them both in darkness.

"Seb-" Clary said, and was cut off by Seb planting a wet kiss on her, his fingers finding purchase in his hair, unaware that her eyes were still open, her body unmoving.

"Seb…" She said between kisses, "Can you stop for a minute…"

"What's wrong?" He asked, pushing the pair further back into the cupboard. Clary felt her back hit the wall, and she grimaced as he trailed his hands along her body, down her jean clad legs.

"Wait…" She murmured, trying to move her hands to his chest, but he only took this as a sign of encouragement. She had wanted to tell him they needed to slow down- that they had fun together, but maybe she wasn't ready for a boyfriend. Instead she felt him push against her harder, like he was trying to swallow her whole. It was only when she felt his fingers on her zipper that she gave up pushing, and tried her best to just kiss him back.

…

"I don't smell it." Clary said later that night, stacking the discarded books onto the shelf as Izzy swung her legs on the counter. She was finishing up closing the shop early, as Luke wasn't working and it had been dead since six, and Isabelle was trying to convince her that the whole place smelled like moth balls.

"Yeah, well you're used to it, Fray. Spending all your time in this dusty place; why do you even work here? Your parents don't give you a big enough allowance?" Isabelle laughed, flipping absently through Wuthering Heights.

"You know why, you dick. I'm saving for when you and me run away and live together in our tiny house." Clary replied with a grin, and Isabelle smiled back.

"Oh of course! I'm just gong to siphon money from my Trust Fund when the inevitable day comes when you and I escape to Canada."

"Smart plan, Lightwood. Then we can live off caviar instead of Cheetos."

"Duh."

Clary laughed, slapping the book out of her friend's hand and placing it back on the shelf, locking up the register and putting the key in its safe before turning off all the lights.

"Ready?" She said to Isabelle, and her friend nodded, hopping from the counter and heading out the door.

"Hey, you okay?" Izzy asked as Clary locked the front door and pocketed the key. Clary nodded.

"Yeah… just tired. It's been a long day." She said, climbing into Izzy's car and pulling out a cigarette. Isabelle pursed her lips, saying nothing, and headed toward Clary's house. No matter how long Clary had lived there, it never really felt like home. It was too big, too many empty rooms, always absent of parents and people. It may as well be a museum for domestic inadequacy.

"I'll only be a minute, no one's in anyway." Clary said, getting out of the car.

"Okay, Cee. I'll call Mags and tell him to order food- I am star-ving." Isabelle said, pulling out her phone and grinning. Clary shook her head, getting out of the car and running to the front door, ready to grab the clothes she needed and run from the empty house.

It was only once she was inside that she realised she might not be alone. Her mother's coat was hanging on the bannister, a bad habit she did when she knew her husband wouldn't be home. Her handbag was also there, and Clary could hear the faint sound of the television in her mother's room. She ran up the stairs and pushed into her bedroom, ignoring the floor strewn with discarded sketched and heading to her wardrobe, shovelling clothes into the bag without really looking at what she had. She quickly entered her bathroom and grabbed her washbag, hoping that she wouldn't need to be back for a while. Satisfied that she had everything that she needed she left her room and made her way up another flight of stairs toward her parent's room, ready to give her mother a fleeting farewell, obligated to acknowledge their mutual existence. She knocked on the door and pushed it open, expecting to see her mother tucked up in bed in one of her depressions, clutching a bottle of wine and watching an old film.

Walking through the door, she saw her mother asleep in bed.

With a man.

A man who was, distinctly, not her father.

Clary gasped.

Her mother woke up immediately, as though Clary had screamed, rather than whispered. The two nearly identical pairs of eyes met, and Jocelyn Fray immediately sat up with stricken eyes and reached out to her daughter.

The man beside her awoke too, and Clary felt sick to her stomach as she realised it was none other than her boss, Luke. She turned and ran from the room.

"Clarissa! Clary, please wait! Darling."

"Don't fucking speak to me!" Clary shouted, feet pounding down the stairs. Her mother reached out and grabbed her, stopping her daughter from going any further. There was a pleading look in her mother's eyes as she turned her daughter to face her.

"Clary, please, you have to understand. You can't tell anyone, you can't tell your father."

Clary groaned, hot tears welling up in her eyes. But she wasn't going to cry.

"You think I'm going to tell him? You know what he'd do to me?" She hissed, looking her mother up and down. "To you? He'd fucking kill us, mom. How could you do this?" She finished, eyes searching her mother's. Jocelyn's lip quivered and she ran a and over her face. It was moments like this when Clary wondered how they could look so alike, be so alike, and yet be so far away from each other. She missed when she was a child, younger and naïve, and her most favourite person in the world had been her mother.

"Darling, please. You don't understand-"

Clary pulled back her hand and slapped her mother. Hard. Her mother pulled away slightly, shocked from the impact.

"I don't give a shit about your excuses- clean up your mess. And don't ever bring him here again, okay? Don't. Because if Dad ever finds out that this happened, you're going to get us both killed."

She pulled her arm from her mother's grasp and continued down the stairs, only stopping to call back one last time.

"And Luke, in case you didn't get the message, I quit."

With that she ran from the house and threw herself into Isabelle's car, only allowing herself to cry when she was sure they were on their way away from the house that she feared most.

A/N:

I hope you enjoyed! Please leave a review as it means so much and let me know what you think. I'm also currently working on my other stories, so if you have any requests of which I should update next please let me know so that I can work on getting it finished!

Big love.