Timeline- Adam is 13 years old, events occur during the March before Sam leaves for Stanford.
Sam spotted the kid quickly, sitting on the edge of the sidewalk knees pulled up tightly to his chest, his head resting on them as he stared out into the parking lot listlessly. Sam sighed, relieved he'd found Adam safely, but also wishing it wasn't at the local bus station. He'd been praying that Adam would be found at a friend's house or at the mall or even the library, but the dour look on the kid's face made it clear what Sam already knew: Adam was over this life and running away. He approached Adam slowly, not wanting to scare him into bolting.
"Adam," he said calmly.
Adam jumped at the sound of his name, immediately grabbing his duffle from the ground beside him making the move to run.
"Hey…hey" Sam said, holding open his hands in a gesture of peace, "I'm not gonna drag you back."
Adam eyed him warily, "You're not?" he questioned.
Sam shook his head and sat down on the curb next to his younger brother. "No. I totally get wanting to run away."
Adam stared down at his shoes, attempting to ignore his brother.
"Where were you planning to go?" Sam asked.
Adam shrugged, continuing to stare at his shoes.
"Really, I'm just curious."
Adam sighed not looking at Sam, "Figured I go back to Windom, stay with some friends till I got a job."
Sam couldn't help but chuckle, "You know a lot of places hiring 13 year olds?" he scoffed.
Adam glared at him; hurt visible in his eyes and Sam instantly regretted the dig. He had come here to help this kid, not make fun of him.
Adam was quiet again and had returned to staring out into the bus station parking lot. Sam sat quietly as well, unsure on how he wanted to continue the conversation. Part of him wanted to let the kid go, let him run and be free of the life that Sam himself hated so deeply. But the more logical part of his brain realized that Adam was 13 years old, with no one to run to and no real skills to make running even possible. At least when Sam had run away he'd known enough about stealing, lying and recognizing danger to be able to take care of himself for awhile.
Sam sighed with resignation. "I ran away." he started, receiving a shocked stare from Adam. "When I was about your age actually."
"Went to Flagstaff, Arizona. It was two weeks before Dad and Dean found me." Sam explained. He looked down to find that Adam was still staring up at him, urging him to continue.
"I hitchhiked, hot wired a car, took a bus, did everything I could to cover my tracks. I got a little cabin out on the edge of a state park and found the coolest dog you could imagine. I always wanted a dog..." Sam said, staring off into the distance, remembering how happy he was in Flagstaff, how light he felt being out from under his father's thumb. He had relished the time he spent taking care of himself, deciding what he wanted to do and when, not worrying about monsters and training.
"It was a great time actually." Sam admitted.
"Yeah?" Adam said hopefully.
"Yeah. 'Till Dad found me." Sam said as Adam's face fell. Sam could feel his own mood darken at the memory of John bursting into the cabin, red faced with anger and fear. He had lunged at Sam, pulling him into a crushing hug and scanning him for injuries before glancing around at the cabin. Upon seeing no predator or villain holding him hostage John had shaken Sam hard enough to jar his head and rattle his teeth, before he boxed his ears and stormed out, screaming for Sam to follow. After the dizziness of the hit had past, Sam gave his dog one last soft rub between the ears and headed out to the Impala parked in the dirt in front of the cabin. He had passed Dean sitting in the front seat, his face stoic and hard. Sam knew there would be no sympathy or understanding from his big brother on this one. Dean would never understand why Sam just had to get away.
Shaking his head to clear the hurtful memory, Sam glanced down at his younger brother. Being a big brother still felt new to him, especially in times like this. Sam knew he wanted to give Adam the understanding and empathy he never got from Dean, but he also couldn't openly support him running away.
"Adam..." Sam started but stopped short, confused on how he wanted to say what he wanted to say. "Adam, look. I get why you wanna run away. I do. You know I do. I probably hate hunting more than anyone, but running away won't work."
"I'm not staying." Adam said quietly, then mumbled something Sam couldn't quite hear.
"Hmm?" Sam said, leaning down toward his younger brother.
Adam took a deep breath, but didn't look at Sam. "I'm not staying. Not after you go." He said firmly.
Sam was shocked. He hadn't told anyone about the colleges he'd applied to, or the acceptance letters he had received. He'd shredded each one after Pastor Jim had shown them to him. How could Adam have found out?
"How..." Sam whispered, mentally racing to retrace his steps to find the flaw in his plan. He'd been so careful to keep his college intentions from Dad and Dean, knowing how seriously they would react.
"I overheard Mr. Gregory congratulate you last week. He said Stanford is a really tough school to get into."
Sam nodded slowly, remembering the compliment he had received. Adam must have been just behind the door Mr. Gregory had come out of.
"Yeah..." Sam said quietly.
"I'm not staying after you go," Adam said again.
"Why after I go?" Sam questioned, he understood wanting to run away from the hunting life, but why would his own exit make a difference?
"Cause Dad will make Dean keep staying with me and training me and I know Dean just wants to go out on his own. It's not fair. And I'm no good at hunting anyway. I'd rather just go on my own and start over."
Now it made sense. Adam wasn't stupid. He'd seen the pattern of neglect in John's parenting. The fact that Sam and Adam were more often alone in Dean's care then their father's wasn't lost on him. Sam was pretty sure that Adam was right; after he left Dean would still be wholly responsible for Adam, his training and his day-to-day wellbeing. Sam also knew what Adam knew, that Dean loved hunting. He flourished in it. Suddenly Sam understood Adam's dilemma. Selfishly Dean's future was not something Sam had ever considered. He'd been so focused on escaping his father; he'd never stopped to wonder if he was holding his own brother back. Sam felt a little ashamed that his 13 year old brother had more sympathy and worry for Dean then he had ever thought to give.
"Dean does want to hunt, Adam, you're right about that. But it's not like you are a burden to him. He loves you," Sam said.
Adam shook his head. "No. Dean loves you, he tolerates me."
"Adam, that's not true."
"It is true Sam. He doesn't love me; he just knows he has to take care of me. I'm his responsibility- nothing more." Adam said flatly.
"Adam..."
"He almost never uses my name, just calls me 'kid', or some other stupid nickname. He yells at me, he never wants to listen to anything I have to say. Every time he looks at me it feels like he's telling me to shut up."
Sam had expected Adam to cry or get mad, but instead he sat on the curb motionless, as if he didn't have any energy left in him.
"Adam, Dean does care about you," Sam said, trying to get Adam to look him in the eye, "Right now he's tearing up half of this town looking for you."
"Only cause Dad will kill him, if he can't find me." Adam mumbled to the ground.
"No," Sam said, "Dean's scared shitless something could have happen to you. Family is the most important thing to Dean, he'd do anything for family- and you are family."
Adam didn't respond, still seemingly not convinced.
"You know how you're gonna know how much he cares about you?" Sam asked, "By how much he wants to kill you when you come back. If Dean didn't love you, he wouldn't give a shit about you leaving. Dean's gonna throttle you and probably break a few ribs hugging you." Sam smiled.
Adam rolled his eyes, " Yeah that makes me wanna go back,"
"Look I already told you, I'm not here to force you back. You can make your own decisions. But if you leave, make it for the right reasons. Run to something, not just away."
"Is that what you're doing?" Adam questioned, knowingly.
Sam paused a moment, considering.
"Yeah. It is." He confirmed. "Besides, you can't do shit out there on your own till you're 18 anyway. Why do you think I'm waiting till May to tell Dad about college? I gotta make sure he can't drag me back."
Adam nodded thoughtfully and both boys went quiet.
"I'm still not staying after you go," Adam said finally.
The reply surprised Sam. He was silent as he considered what say.
"Ok." he said, after a few moments. "Let me help you come up with a plan, something that will get you free of Dad and Dean but keeps you safe. Maybe moving in with Bobby or Pastor Jim for a while? Just give me some time to think."
Adam was quiet for a moment considering, before finally nodding in agreement "Yeah. Ok".
"Alright, you wanna go back with me?" Sam asked, trying to offer his little brother a choice, even though he knew Adam would accept.
"Yeah ok," Adam said begrudgingly, standing up and grabbing his duffle.
"Hey," Sam said, stopping Adam with a hand on his arm, "Keep your mouth shut about college ok?" he said seriously.
"Yeah, of course," Adam said casually, like he had never considered telling Dad and Dean anything.
"Yeah ok," Sam said, breathing a small sigh of relief and leading Adam out of the bus station and down the road back to the motel.