(A/N: It's a showdown not to be missed. Sonia Nevermind Vs Bandit Keith. Do note that I don't like the dub's change from Revolver Dragon to Barrel Dragon. F**k you 4kids censorship. Any chance I can get to subvert that shit I will. Now, let's go!)
Bandit Keith and Sonia stood a comfortable distance away from each other, the restaurant Keith had been drinking at off to one side, with a tall building to Keith's right with Sonia standing dead center in a four-way intersection. The two had just declared their readiness to duel and Sonia was ready to kick things off.
"Since I am both a challenger and a princess," Sonia said, "I shall start things off. And I shall play Shining Angel in attack mode." Sonia's monster appeared. It was a fairy with glowing, orange wings and a blue tunic. "I turn the duel over to you, Mr. Keith," Sonia smiled.
Bandit Keith smirked with a smug grin. "A girl playing with girly cards. This duel will be over in record time. I draw." He looked at his hand. "I play this, Mechanical Chaser, in attack mode!" A monster with a round torso, spear in one hand, crooked, bendy second hand and a third appendage sticking out of the base of its torso appeared. It had 1850 attack points. "And I'll equip it with Machine Conversion Factory, raising its attack points up to 2150." Mechanical Chaser was given a tune-up as its body was covered in tools, wires and gadgetry and it was given a shiny, chrome coating. "And now, Mechanical Chaser attack! Mechanical spear strike!"
"Aaagh!" Sonia yelped as Mechanical Chaser destroyed her monster, reducing her life points down to 3250.
Bandit Keith chuckled. "Clapping won't bring that fairy back to life," he said.
"Perhaps, but you have activated Shining Fairy's special ability," Sonia declared, arm outstretched. "When he's destroyed I may play any one of my monsters in my deck into attack position that is a light monster with 1500 attack points or less and I choose Queen's Knight."
"Bid deal," Bandit Keith barked. "You can't destroy Mechanical Chaser with that card!"
"Perhaps not, but do not underestimate the power of a princess," Sonia said with a confident smile.
"Oh I won't, princess," Bandit Keith said with a smirk.
"You'd do best to correct your condescending tone," Sonia said politely. "I can forgive ignorance, but I actually am foreign royalty. I'm Princess Sonia Nevermind from the country of Novoselic."
"Never heard of it," Keith said. "Sounds made up."
"Silence! I will not have you dishonor my home land," Sonia said in a commanding tone.
Keith sweated for a moment, finding it impossible to say anything more, but at the same time unable to bring himself to apologize. "Just make your move."
"I shall," Sonia said.
"You fix that TV yet?" Nekomaru asked. "We're missing the tournament."
"Hey, I'm not the one that somehow got grape juice all over the circuit board and tried to cover it up with duct tape and panic so get off my back, will ya?" Kazuichi snapped.
"Seriously, cut him some slack, at least he's doing more than complain about it," Mahiru said, giving Kazuichi some actual words of encouragement. "But seriously, are you almost done?"
"Just about, actually," Kazuichi said and closed the panel. "There, should be good as new. Who's got the remote?"
"I-I do," Mikan said.
"Well," Kazuichi said, coming out from around the TV. "Fire this sucker up and let's watch us some duels."
Eyes closed and pointing the remote at the TV, Mikan nervously hit the power button. The TV came to life, but it was unfocused a little. "Eek! I'm sorry, I broke it!" Mikan exclaimed.
"No, no, it's not broken," Kazuichi said. "Here, lemme see that a sec." Mikan handed the remote to her classmates.
With a few button presses, the image was crisp and clear and the spectators of Class 77-B were rewarded with a menu screen along with a duel happening in the upper left corner, though it wasn't involving any pro-duelists or anyone in their class.
"A menu screen?" Mahiru said interrogatively.
"Guess you can pick from the duels that are currently going on to see who's dueling and where," Nekomaru said. "KaibaCorp sure knows how to let folks at home check up on the action."
"Let's see if anyone in our class is dueling." Using the up and down keys on the remote, Kazuichi scrolled through the active duels, which were in order from last started to newest started. At the tippy top, Gundham Vs Espa Roba was listed as just finishing in Gundham's favor.
"Looks like Gundham's doing well," Nekomaru said. "I don't see anyone else from our class though."
"You don't think they lost already, do you?" Mahiru asked.
"No way, our classmates are way tough!" Akane exclaimed. "I mean, it's a game right. That's like, Chiaki's forte. I'll bet she's already on her way to the finals!"
"K-Kazuichi, l-look!" Mikan stuttered.
Towards the bottom read the name: Sonia Nevermind.
"Miss Sonia's dueling? This I gotta see!" Kazuichi selected the duel being viewed as the menu bar shrunk to the side and Sonia's duel blew up onto most of the screen.
"Who's that guy?" Mahiru asked, watching as Queen's Knight was summoned to the field.
Kazuichi let out a rather horrified scream.
"What's wrong with you?" Fuyuhiko said, entering the room. "A big rat run across your foot or something?"
"Fuyuhiko, Peko, you guys are back already?" Mahiru asked.
Meanwhile, on the television, Sonia was playing Pot of Greed and drawing two more cards.
"We challenged Joey Wheeler one at a time and we lost," Peko said. "We are unfortunately eliminated."
"Well then, why not have a loser's compensation and chow down to a home-cooked meal?" Teruteru suggested. "We were just about to watch Sonia duel against a rather intense looking gentleman," he said with blood dribbling out of his nose.
Fuyuhiko walked into the center of the room. "Huh? That ain't no gentleman! That's the intercontinental champion, Bandit Keith!"
"You know that guy?" Mahiru asked.
"Heard of him, actually," Fuyuhiko admitted. "He's one of the best duelists in the west. What the hell is Sonia thinking?"
"That's what I want to know!" Kazuichi exclaimed. "We gotta go give her our support."
"Yeah, okay," Mahiru said, putting a hand on her temple. "And where exactly are you rushing off to, o dashing knight?"
"Ah…" Kazuichi started only to stop and sigh.
Mahiru let out a deep sigh. "That's what I thought."
"Oh, I hope Sonia will be okay," Mikan said, hands clenched together in worry.
"I wouldn't worry too much," Nekomaru said.
"How can we not worry?" Kazuichi barked.
"Well for starters look at the field," Nekomaru said as Sonia had finished summoning King's Knight and was now special summoning Jack's Knight to the field. "Not to mention, I was worried about Sonia too when I heard she wanted to participate in the tournament. Do you know what she said to me?"
"Oh it's all right, Nekomaru. Among the ladies of the royal Novoselic court, I'm actually the best duelist amongst us all."
"Huh," Kazuichi said, rather surprised, but also reassured.
"So why don't we keep our support from here. I'm sure Sonia knows we're all behind her anyway." Nekomaru then laughed. "Besides, if she loses we can comfort her with all of this delicious food!"
"Have as much as you'd like," Teruteru said. "And if anyone wants, I can always whip up more."
Thinking Kazuichi looked at Sonia's duel with apprehension and faith. Come on, Miss Sonia. You can win. Show this Bandit Keith character that you're the best there is.
Back on site at the duel, Sonia had just finished summoning Jack's Knight. "And what exactly do you plan to do with those monsters?" Bandit Keith asked.
"I play to fuse them together!" Sonia declared.
"You what?" Bandit declared. Fusing Jack's Knight, King's Knight and Queen's Knight? Was that even possible.
Sonia sure seemed to think so. "I play Polymerization to fuse King's Knight, Queen's Knight and Jack's Knight together to create: Arcana Knight Joker!"
With a twirl and a shower of violet petals and playing cards, a knight garbed in all black with purple hair appeared. He had golden pauldrons and carried a longsword in his right hand with a buckler on his left arm. He had 3800 attack points and 2500 defense points.
Bandit Keith's jaw went slack. "You gotta be kidding me."
"And that is not all," Sonia said. "I shall also play my Quick Attack magic card, which allows me to attack immediately."
"Ah crap!" Bandit Keith declared.
"Go my Arcana Knight Joker!" Sonia declared. "Destroy Mechanical Chaser!"
Taking his sword in both of his hands, Arcana Knight Joker leapt at Mechanial Chaser with a spinning slash, cutting it in half and destroying it. Bandit Keith's life points fell all the way to 2350, giving Sonia a significant lead.
"All right, Miss Sonia! And against the Intercontinental Champ no less!" Kazuichi declared.
"I wouldn't celebrate just yet," Fuyuhiko said. "I guarantee Bandit Keith still has a few tricks up his sleeve either figuratively or literally."
"As they say in Duel Monsters," Sonia said to Bandit Keith. "It is your move."
"Sure thing, Sweet Heart," Bandit Keith said, recovering from his earlier setback, mentally. "And I'm summoning one monster in face-down defense mode. Then I'm throwing one card face-down on the field. Go ahead, toots, show me your stuff."
"As you wish," Sonia said and drew the top card of her deck. "I play Mystic Space Typhoon, which destroys your face-down card." Bandit Keith's face-down card turned out to be Mirror Force. He braced for impact as the typhoon carried it away and destroyed it. "Hmm," Sonia said, slightly troubled. "I would not expect the intercontinental champ to play with such tricks, but I suppose when you are pushed into a corner you make novice mistakes." With a twinkle in her eye, Sonia declared, "And now, Arcana Knight Joker, attack!"
Bandit Keith smirked when his Cyber Jar was destroyed by Sonia's monster.
"Ah, not Cyber Jar!" Sonia exclaimed in fright.
"That's right!" Bandit Keith declared with a shit eating grin. "And because of its special ability your Arcana Knight is toast!"
Sonia's Arcana Knight was destroyed. The two duelists then picked up the top five cards from their deck. Bandit Keith smirked. "Say hello to my Cyber Falcon, Giga Tech Wolf, Robotic Knight, and Ground Attacker Bugroth, all in defense mode!" Four machine monsters took to the field, each varying in degrees of attack and defense.
"It appears I can only play one monster," Sonia said, "My Darklord Nurse Reficule." A woman with purple hair, scary wings and covered in bandages appeared on the battlefield. It had 1400 attack points and 600 defense points.
"Well, them's the brakes then, sorry Princess," Bandit Keith said, insincerely.
"Oh, but who said I was done?" Sonia asked. "My Battle Phase continues and I shall destroy Ground Attacker Bugroth. My Nurse Reficule's 1400 attack points are enough to destroy its 1000 defense points."
"Aw, crud," Keith complained. He had played all his monsters in defense mode to protect his ailing life points. Oh well, one monster wasn't too bad.
"And now that my Battle Phase is over, I shall follow up with this: Graceful Charity, allowing me to draw three cards as long as I discard two."
"Okay, so what?" Bandit Keith asked. "You're gonna have to discard several cards at the end of your turn now."
"That suits me just fine for I activate the spell card Premature Burial, which lets me bring Darklord Superbia back from the graveyard to my field. It will cost me 800 life points, but that is a small price to pay," Sonia said as her life points fell to 2450.
A crow-looking creature with a red, bald head appeared. It had 2900 attack points.
"What the hell?" Bandit Keith shouted. "When did that thing go to the graveyard."
"Just now when I played Graceful Charity," Sonia said sweetly. "But that is not all, I shall also activate Darklord Superbia's special ability. When it is summoned from the graveyard, I get to call another fairy type monster from my graveyard back to my side of the field and I select the other card I discarded: my Darklord Edeh Arae. A fiendish looking fairy that had the face of Frankenstein's monster appeared on the battlefield. It had 2300 attack points and 2000 defense points. "Darklord Edeh Arae also has a special ability. If it was summoned from my graveyard, then when it attacks a monster in defense position, you still take life point damage equal to the difference in my monster's attack and your monster's defense."
"N-no!" Bandit Keith stuttered.
"And last, but certainly not least, I play Monster Reborn so that I can bring Arcana Knight Joker back to the field in attack position."
Sonia's monster appeared once more with its familiar fanfare.
"Next, I shall play one card face-down on the field and end my turn," Sonia said with a sweet smile. "Like this, I no longer need to discard anything from my hand."
"YEAH!" Kazuichi declared. "Go, Miss Sonia! Look at all those strong monsters."
"Get down from the desk, you're going to hurt yourself," Mahiru told him.
"And you're blocking the view," Hiyoko complained.
Nekomaru promptly picked up Kazuichi and placed his feet firmly on the ground.
"I wouldn't mind getting manhandled like that if you don't mind, Nekomaru," Teruteru said, but was bonked on the head by Peko with her bamboo sword by Fuyuhiko's silent order.
"I gotta admit," Bandit Keith said, trying to show that he wasn't completely shaking in his boots. "You took me by surprise with that move, lady, not good enough though." Bandit Keith grabbed Cyber Falcon and Giga Tech Wolf. "I summon Revolver Dragon!" A gigantic, all black machine with three revolvers attached to it—one on its head and the other two for arms—appeared on the battlefield. Bandit Keith then contemplated his next move. That Arcana Knight Joker is something else. Because of its special ability, if I target it right now, she might be able to discard a monster card from her hand and save it. Best to play it safe. "And I'm gonna target your Darklord Superbia with my Barrel Dragon's special ability. It has three barrels each chamber filled with either a blank or a live round and if two of those chambers are filled with live rounds, I can destroy it, no questions asked. Go Barrel Dragon! Attack!"
Barrel Dragon's chambers tumbled one slot forward as it fired all three of its guns, three live rounds coming out and utterly annihilating Darklord Superbia. Bandit Keith laughed. "Direct hit. Now how about an encore performance? But first, I'm switching my Robotic Knight into attack mode. And now, Revolver Dragon attack and destroy Darklord Edeh Arae!"
With three blasts from its guns, Barrel Dragon destroyed Sonia's monster, reducing her life points down to 2150.
"And that's not all, Robotic Knight, destroy her Darklord Nurse Reticule. Machine Gun Blitz attack!"
Robotic Knight unloaded its machine gun arm and destroyed Sonia's monster, bringing down her life points to 1950. Bandit Keith laughed in a mocking manner. "And after you worked so hard to get your monsters on the field."
Distraught, Sonia said, "I must say, you did take me by surprise." She steeled her willpower and gave Bandit Keith her toughest look. "But I have not given up."
"Whatever, it's your turn," he told her, "But not before I play one card face-down on the field."
"Okay!" Sonia declared. She drew the top card of her deck. "First I shall play my Royal Knight in attack mode." Sonia played a monster with 1300 attack points that was all white with wings, carried a sword and had a humanoid shape. "And next, I shall equip it with Cestus of Dalga. Now when my Royal Knight destroys a monster, I gain life points equal to the damage dealt and that is on top of Royal Knight's special ability for when he destroys a monster, I gain life points equal to that monster's defense points. Oh! And Cestus of Dalga also raises my monster's attack power by 500 points. So now it is strong enough to destroy Robotic Knight."
"Next, go my Arcana Joker Knight, destroy Revolver Dragon!" Sonia declared.
"I don't think so!" Bandit Keith shouted, "I activate my face-down card: Block Attack to switch your monster to defense mode!"
"Sorry, but I'm discarding one magic card from my hand to negate your magic card's effect, allowing my attack to continue."
Ugh, Bandit Keith groaned inwardly. It was worth a shot.
"Now, Arcana Knight, destroy Mr. Keith's Revolver Dragon!"
With a spinning, leaping sword slash, Bandit Keith's monster was destroyed and his life points fell down to 1150.
"And now, Royal Knight attacks and destroys Robotic Knight."
"This can't be!" Bandit Keith declared as Sonia's Royal Knight destroyed his machine. "I might actually lose?!" His life points fell to 950 and Sonia's life points climbed all the way to 3950, practically putting her at full strength.
"It is your move," Sonia said with a smile.
Ugh, Keith thought. What the hell do I do now? I've got no monsters on the field and she's got a monster on the field that I can't freaking touch. Bandit Keith took a deep breath. Just play it cool, Keith. Don't let the babe see you rattled. You got this. "I draw!" Bandit Keith declared and drew the top card of his deck. "And now, I'll play the card you played earlier: Graceful Charity. Now I draw three cards as long as I discard two." After performing both actions, Bandit Keith said, "And now, I'll use Monster Reborn to let me bring back the Slot Machine I just discarded, just like how you did the same with your monsters."
Sonia was perplexed. I wonder why that monster, perhaps it can do something his Revolver Dragon cannot?
"And next, I'm playing the magic card, Cost Down! By discarding one card from my hand, I can summon a monster in my hand that requires one sacrifice for no sacrifices. So say hello to Machine King!" Bandit Keith summoned a personal favorite of machine users everywhere.
"Oh my," Sonia gasped.
"Okay toots, party's over!" Bandit Keith exclaimed. "I activate this magic card. It's called Big Jackpot and it can only be used on a Slot Machine. For one turn its attack and defense points are boosted by 2100."
"No!" Sonia declared in fright. "My Arcana Knight!"
"Slot machine, go! Plasma Gun Cannon Fire!" Bandit Keith's monster let loose a bolt of hot plasma, which ripped through Sonia's monster and utterly eradicated it, bringing her life points down to 3650.
"T-tis merely a scratch," Sonia said, a little shaken up by the explosion.
"Yeah, well it wouldn't be Big Jackpot without an added effect, now would it? If the damage dealt to you as a result of using this card is 700 or less, the damage your dealt gets multiplied out by seven. So you lose 1800 more life points."
"No!" Sonia gasped as her life points dropped sharply all the way down to 1850.
"And I'm not done yet. Machine King attacks! Jet Punch!"
Machine King launched its rocket arm off of its body and straight up punched Royal Knight in the face, destroying it. Sonia was now left with only 1250 life points.
"Ahahahahahaha!" Keith laughed. "You've got no monsters left to protect you, princess. Next turn, your life points are toast.
"I'm sorry," Sonia said, giving Bandit Keith her sweetest smile. "But there will not be a next turn, Mr. Keith."
"Oh yeah? Prove it!" Bandit Keith declared.
"Gladly!" Sonia said and drew the top card of her deck. "Reveal face-down card! Call of the Haunted! And I shall use it to bring back Darklord Superbia!"
Bandit Keith was dumbstruck. "You gotta be kiddin me."
"And I shall do the exact same thing as before, bring back Dark Lord Edeh Arae from my graveyard!"
Keith growled. "All right, you said there wasn't going to be a next turn, but if I've got my math right, I'll still have 150 life points left."
"And there won't be," Sonia said. "Because I'm sacrificing my Darklord Edeh Arae to bring out another Darklord. Behold, my Darklord Desire!" A monster emerged with 3000 attack points. It had big, hulking gilded gauntlets on its otherwise darkly garbed form. It had shimmering red wings and a beautifully crested helmet.
"How did you summon a monster that strong with only one tribute?" Bandit Keith panicked. Sonia had to be cheating.
"I can perform a special type of tribute summon if I tribute a fairy type monster and most of the cards in my deck are," Sonia explained. "And now," she declared happily, arm outstretched, palm angled at the ground, "I shall activate Darklord Desire's special ability. At the cost of 1000 of its attack points, I can destroy one monster on your side of the field and the monster I choose is Slot Machine."
"N-no!" Bandit Keith stuttered.
By converting its attack points into power, Darklord Desire annihilated Slot Machine with a special powered beam.
"And now," Sonia said. "Darklord Superbia attacks! Darklord's Destruction Gust!"
A black wind blew from a beat of Darklord Superbia's wings, which destroyed Machine King and reduced Bandit Keith's life points down to a measly 350.
"This ain't right!" Bandit Keith shouted indignantly.
"Bow down," Sonia said with a very contralto tone. "I attack your life points directly with Darklord Desire!"
The magnificent, weakened fairy flew in and punched Keith right in the chest, bowling him over and taking out the rest of his life points.
Man, talk about overkill, Kazuichi thought. Miss Sonia could've just attacked Keith's Slot Machine with Desire and not have had to destroy it, but that's Miss Sonia for you. "Did you see that?" Kazuichi exclaimed, pumping his fist and clenching his bicep. "Even an intercontinental champ is nothing compared to Miss Sonia's skill."
"Pfft, she got lucky," Hiyoko scoffed.
"Hiyoko…do you want to learn to play Duel Monsters?" Mahiru asked.
"No!" Hiyoko shouted, pointing an accusatory finger at her only friend. "Why would I want to learn some stupid game?"
"You say that, but you were waiting with baited breath when we watched the match," Nekomaru said.
"Ewwww, were you watching me you pervert!" Hiyoko exclaimed, revolting in disgust.
Mahiru sighed with a smile. "Hiyoko, if you want to play the game, I'd be happy to teach you. I mean, I'm not very good at the game, but I still have all my dad's cards after he quit. He thought I'd like them." She sighed. "He really ought to try again. I mean, if you quit every time you're defeated how is that a career or a struggle for success?"
Hiyoko still looked grouchy. "Hmph."
"Well, if you change your mind, let me know. I actually rather like the game myself. I'm just a total novice."
"I could teach you both how to play better," Kazuichi said, fired up. "Watching Miss Sonia duel got me in the mood for a duel! I mean, I barely got edged out of the KaibaCorp's AI, but I still count myself above novice level."
"Heh, why learn from a total scrub when you could learn from the best player in this room?" Fuyuhiko asked, smirking. "I actually got in the tournament."
"Why don't we host our own tournament right here in the classroom?" Nekomaru suggested. "We can all take turns playing. I've got a whole bunch of cards!"
"That reminds me, why aren't you in the tournament?" Mahiru asked. "With how much of a spectacle Duel Monsters is, I would've thought you'd trained at least one pro-duelist protégé by now."
"Hey, yeah, coach, you're better at this card stuff than I am. You even explained it to me when you were dragging me back to the building," Akane said. "How come you aren't in it? I bet you'd kick ass!"
Nekomaru paused for a moment. The truth was that he had participated in the tournament try-outs, but his heart condition had gotten the better of him and he had to forfeit the match. Normally, dueling wasn't so strenuous, but with the addition of the holograms and the nail-biting tension, his heart couldn't take the strain. He thought maybe to share that with his classmates, but didn't quite feel close to everyone listening to share the cold-hard truth. So, he made up a lie on the spot, but a heartwarming lie nonetheless, "Remember how Yukizome put me in charge of you guys? Well, I could've been in the tournament." Nekomaru laughed. "But somebody's gotta make sure you guys don't do anything stupid!"
"Wow…that's…huh," For his big bravado, Mahiru hadn't expected Nekomaru to be so…wholesome.
"So then, who's up for dueling boot camp? Got my trunk in my dorm room full of cards. If you don't have a deck, you can just use my spares. I've got PLENTY!"
"That sounds like fun," Mikan said. "I-I've always wanted to learn how to play, but…" she looked sad. "No one would teach me."
"Sounds like this is gonna get juicy," Teruteru said. "I'd best work up another buffet. I know how dueling can work up a person's appetite."
"Aren't you going to participate?" Kazuichi asked.
"Oh, no, no, don't mind me," Teruteru said. "I'll just cater to you all watching your foreheads strain with brain busting strategic insights as you sweat from all the tension."
"Gross," Hiyoko said.
Meanwhile, back with Sonia and Keith, the American duelist could not believe he just lost. "I…this…is insulting…the intercontinental champ…beaten by a no-name duelist AGAIN?!"
Sonia seemed to have no sympathy for Keith, smiling sweetly as she approached for her spoils of war. "Since I won, I get your best card and two of your locator cards."
"And I owe you a favor as I wagered," Bandit Keith said.
"Ah, right, you did say I could ask for any favor. Well then..."
"What?" Bandit Keith asked with a sigh. "If it's something humiliating get it over with."
Sonia asked politely. "Could you escort me back to the big clock tower in the middle of the city? I'm afraid I'm hopelessly lost."
Bandit Keith blinked repeatedly at the mundane request. "That…that's it?"
"That's it!" Sonia exclaimed happily.
"That's all you want? You could ask for money, to borrow my whole deck, a free meal for a week, or for me to be your eternal servant, but all you want is directions?"
"Uh huh," Sonia nodded.
Bandit Keith sighed. Women. "Yeah, sure okay." He said and willfully played escort service to Sonia, leading her back to the center of town.
(A/N: Up yours, Keith! And wow this chapter is shorter than I thought it would be with all the added cutaways to the Class 77-B group. Still, Keith proves why Espa Roba, to me, is the superior machine duelist. I actually had an idea for Revolver Dragon where Keith flipped a two-headed coin to cheat for its effect (though Revolver Dragon was doomed to get destroyed next turn anyway) but when I remembered that other coin flip monsters get reduced to random chance in the anime, I just improvised.
Anyway, next chapter we go back to Nagito for a spell and see his first real duel. He's more than just dumb luck and Exodia after all, which his carefully selected opponent will be made all too well aware. See you all later for the exciting 10th chapter of Dueling Trigger Finger and, as always, from all of me, to all of you, let your hearts stay human and your wrath draconic. Ja ne!)