(A/N: So this has been a long time coming. My apologies for the delay. You can blame my three weeks of overnights (including this week) for making me tired, lethargic and unwilling to do any work on a series like this. I actually was content to let it squander a little longer, but a good friend of mine actually enjoys this story and she's very hard to please so out of fear of constant nagging—as I envision being bonked on the head with a squeaky hammer if she were in hitting distance—here it is, the duel I've built up for the last 16 chapters. This needs some appropriate mustic *goes to Listenonrepeat and selects a tune* Perfect).
Hands stocked, hologram projectors deployed, Joey and Celeste prepared to face-off.
"You can do it, Joey. Ibuki believes in you!" Ibuki cheered.
Prove to me you are worth my attention, Celestia Ludenburg, Marik thought. Defeat Joseph Wheeler so that I can use him to make the Pharaoh suffer so that I may obtain his millennium puzzle and rule the world!
"I'm ready if you are," Joey said.
"The holograms are deployed," Celeste said with a smirk. "I see no cause for delay."
"All right then," Joey said.
Then he and Celeste said at the same time, "Let's Duel!"
"Why don't you take the first move, Joey?" Celeste offered.
"Don't mind if I do!" Joey declared. "I draw!" he drew the top card of his deck.
Fool, Celeste thought, holding her cards by her face in place of her fist. Against an opponent like Joey, reacting was better than acting against him. Plus, she would get the chance to attack first.
"I play Gearfried the Iron Knight!" Joey shouted. "In attack mode! Next, I'll throw one card face-down and end my turn."
"Predictable," Celeste said with an expressionless face as she tore the top card off of her deck with a precise, swift motion. Glaring so slightly at Joey and his monster, she said, "I'll start by playing Mystic-Space Typhoon and rid the field of your face-down card."
"Nyaah!" Joey yelped as Celeste's gust of wind utterly destroyed his Skull Dice, one of his better trap cards.
"Next, I play Cost Down," Celeste said and held one card in front of her graveyard. "By sending one card to my graveyard, I can lower the stars of all the monsters in my hand by two."
"Eh, why would you do that?" Joey asked.
"So I can do this of course," Celeste said. "I play Trance the Magic Swordsman in attack position!" The mighty magically armored warrior with a whopping 2600 attack points hit the battlefield.
"Say what?" Joey gasped.
"What? Can you not do simple math?" Celeste asked. "Trance the Magic Swordsman has six stars, but with Cost Down it has four, therefore I can play it without needing to tribute a monster. Dear me, defeating you may prove simpler than I thought. How you got to be a Duelist Kingdom finalist is beyond me," Celeste said. In truth, she knew the reason, but psychological trash talk was part of any duel and Joey was an easy one to rile up. "Now, Trance, attack! Destroy Gearfried the Iron Knight!"
Celeste's monster lifted its powerful sword and struck forward, cutting through Gearfried's armor and sending it right to the graveyard. Joey's life points were reduced to 3200 and he was now defenseless. And it was only his second turn.
"That'll do for now," Celeste said.
"I told you not to duel her!" Teá exclaimed.
"Why are you so worried?" Ibuki asked, looking confused.
"Huh?" Teá looked at Ibuki.
"Look at Joey's face," she said.
Teá did as Ibuki suggested. Joey had his heels dug into the concrete and his face was filled with stern determination.
"See? Joey's not gonna let a big monster like that scare 'em. He wouldn't have made it this far if he was the type to run away." Ibuki smiled brightly and cheerfully. "That's why Ibuki likes him so much."
"Determination will only get you so far," Namu said. "At the end of the day," he said, looking at Celeste, "It comes down to a powerful combination of skill and luck."
"Well, I guess I can't argue with that," Ibuki said.
"Come on, Joey," Teá said lowly.
After taking a minute to composure himself, Joey drew his next card. He looked at his hand. He wasn't happy with what was in it. Ahhh, what am I supposed to do with this? He groaned. All I can do is offer up fodder to Celeste's swordsman. However, just as he was about to play Battle Warrior in defense mode, he noticed what was in his hand. Wait a sec, I almost forgot. "All right, here goes!" Joey declared, grabbing three cards from his hand. "I activate the spell card, Polymerization! And I'm summoning a little special something! Using the power of two monsters without special abilities—my Tiger Axe and Battle Warrior—I'm bringing out a new friend. Say hello to First of the Dragons!"
The massive monster that Joey won off of Fuyuhiko roared over his shoulder.
An impressive card, Marik thought, How will you counter it, Celestia Ludenburg?
"Next, I'm playing one card face-down on my field and ending my turn," Joey declared. "You know, since I can't attack due to the fusion rule and all."
"Hmph, an unwise decision," Celeste said. "First of the Dragons is easily dispatchable by a normal monster and my Trance the Magic Swordsman is more than fit for the job."
"Now who's bad at math?" Joey asked. "Your monster has 100 less attack points than mine."
"Not for long," Celeste said as she drew the top card of her deck and revealed a spell card in her hand. "I activate Black Pendant, increasing my swordsman's attack power by 500 points to 3100." The negative energies of the pendant powered up Trance as it made its home snugly around the spellcaster's neck, making it more powerful than your dragon. Now Trance, attack!"
"I don't think so!" Joey declared, "I activate my trap card, Armored Glass!"
"What?" Celeste gasped.
"This trap card negates the effects of all equip-type magic cards in play until the end of this turn. So my monster's back at the top of the food chain!"
"Hmph," Celeste frowned. Using such a situational type of trap card? What sort of barbaric fool IS he?
Celeste watched as Trance the Magic Swordsman was destroyed by Joey's dragon, bringing her life points down to 3900.
"How'd ya like that?" Joey asked, giving Celeste a firm thumb's down.
"It'll do for an amateur comeback. Now watch as I raise the stakes in this little battle." Celeste inserted a spell card into the spell/trap zone. "I activate the continuous spell card: Wave-Motion Cannon!"
A gigantic energy cannon appeared next to Celeste, aiming right at Joey.
He braced for impact.
"Oh, relax," Celeste said. "This card needs to charge up before it can do any damage. Specifically, for every one of your turns that passes after its activated, it can deal 1000 points of damage on my turn when I choose to sacrifice it. And that effect stacks until I can annihilate all of your life points in one fell swoop."
"But that only gives me…"
"Three turns," Celeste said. "Well, Joey?" she asked, putting her fist by her mouth. "I've raised the stakes. The only question remains is if you're going to call my bet. Or will you surrender this duel and run like a little puppy dog with your tail between your legs. I honestly won't think less of you if you do. After all, you're only a D-rank human to me."
"Hey! That's not nice! Joey's at least a B-rank!"
"I'm not talking about skill in Duel Monsters you loud, naïve twit. I'm talking about life," Celeste said, fiddling with the end of her hair. "If it wasn't for this tournament, or Duel Monsters, you, Joey, don't interest me in the slightest. So like I said, I won't think less of you for it."
"Yeah, well guess what? If you were hoping for an easy victory, you ain't gettin' one!" Joey exclaimed.
Celeste chuckled, fingers in front of her lips. "Ah, I do so love that kind of defiance in these games. Did you actually think I wanted an easy victory?" Celeste's eyes grew very hollow as she gave Joey a nightmarish expression that made it look like she was staring deep into his soul. "There is nothing I enjoy more than taking out a spirited competitor and showing him just how little his skill and talent really matter in the face of my ability as a gambler." Celeste then did a complete 180 and smiled brightly. "And you, Joey, I cannot wait to see the silly look on your face when I finally beat you."
"Well you'll be waitin' for an eternity because I ain't gonna lose to the likes of you!" Joey declared defiantly.
Celeste stopped smiling and stroked her chin with her finger brace. "My, my you really are just a loud Neanderthal. But I suppose that's cute in its own way." She chuckled and laughed. "The same way that a mentally addled puppy pissing into its own eye is cute. Besides, everyone knows cats are better." Celeste plucked one of the two remaining cards in her hand and played it face-down. "I shall play one card on the field and end my turn."
"All right then, my turn," Joey said, "I draw!" he declared, firmly grabbing the top card of his deck. He looked at the only card in his hand. I dunno what Celeste is up to, but I don't want to take a risk with whatever that face-down card is. He looked at the two cards in his hand and then looked back at the field. "First of the Dragons, attack Celeste's life points directly! Ancestral Dragon Blast!"
"I don't think so!" Celeste declared. "Activate the trap card: Mirror Force!"
I knew it! Joey declared, watching as the trap card reflected his attack right back into his monster's face, sending it to the graveyard.
"I honestly can't believe you walked right into that," Celeste said, glancing aside. "You really are a boring human being."
"Actually, I had a feeling you planned that," Joey said with an amused grin. "An obvious trap like that wouldn't surprise a fourth grader."
Celeste's attention was caught.
"Cause if I had fallen for it, I wouldn't have waited until after I attacked ta do dis! Go! Axe Raider!" Joey summoned the armored axe warrior to the battlefield in attack mode. "Heh heh, I didn't have anti-trap card ready to go, but I didn't want to take the risk you'd put me in a real bind on your next turn, so I sprung your dumb trap and let you think I didn't have any more monsters. Whatdya say to that, Celeste?" Joey barked.
"I'd say you need to learn better strategies then if that was your optimal move," Celeste said and drew the top card of her deck. "Excellent." She played the card she'd just drawn. "I play Pot of Greed, allowing me to draw two cards, gamble free. Also, since your turn passed, My Wave-Motion Cannon can now deal 1000 points of damage," Celeste said as the cannon whirred a bit louder and glowed. "But I won't fire it this turn. Instead, I'll play this. I activate Monster Reborn!"
"Heh, too bad for you, but my First of the Dragons can only be summoned by fusing. You can't use Monster Reborn to bring him back."
"Who said I was targeting your graveyard?" Celeste asked. "I'm targeting my own graveyard."
"Aw, no. Not Trance the Magic Swordsman," Joey complained.
"Heh," Celeste smirked. "As if I'm the type of fool that uses the same trick twice. I summon Phoenix Beast Gairuda to the field!"
"What?" Joey gasped, watching as Celeste's favorite monster hit the battlefield, wings spread out wide. It had 2500 attack points. "Hold on a sec, when did that thing go to the graveyard?"
"Oh, I sent it there with Cost Down, don't you remember?" Celeste asked, fiddling with her hair and acting like her action was no big deal.
"Say what?" Joey gasped. Why would anyone discard such a powerful monster?
"I got inspired for my strategy by a very spirited competitor in my last duel." Celeste laughed at Joey's misery. "And judging from the look on your face, I'd say it was a gamble well worth the payoff. I'll be taking your life points as my reward. Phoenix Beast Gairuda," she declared, pointing with her finger brace, "Attack! Destroy Axe Raider! And thanks to its special ability, it gains 300 attack points when it declares an attack!"
Phoenix Beast Gairuda wrapped itself in hot flames and charged forward, destroying Joey's monster and sending it straight to the graveyard, causing him to lose 1100 life points. This brought his total down to 2100.
Very impressive, Marik thought. Even though she lost to Chiaki Nanami, she's learned from her defeat and even used Chiaki's strategy on Wheeler. He looked across the dueling arena to the now sweating Joey Wheeler. And now look at him, sweating and nervous. Celestia Ludenburg, you may be qualified to become one of my most powerful Rare Hunters yet.
"What's the matter, Namu?" Ibuki asked. "You're awfully quiet. Aren't you going to cheer for Joey?"
"What?" Marik gasped, trying to quickly compose himself as his alias. "Oh, no," he said with a harmless tone of voice, "I'm not really the talkative type. I get so invested in duels, I hardly ever say a word when I'm spectating."
"Oh, I so know what you mean. Ibuki's that way with horror films, minus her constant eye boggling and screaming."
"Hang in there, Joey!" Teá exclaimed. "You can do it!"
"Darn right I can," Joey said and drew the top card from his deck. "Watch this. I draw!" He was satisfied with his draw. "I activate Scapegoat, letting me get four sheep tokens to the field to protect myself. So if you want to attack me directly, you gotta get through these little guys first."
"Sending lambs to the slaughter, how appropriate," Celeste said dryly. "I regret to inform you that you're on a timer." She drew the top card of her deck. "The timer that is my Wave Motion Cannon that is. Since another one of your turns passed, my cannon's destructive capabilities are up to 2000 life points worth of power." The cannon charged and whirred louder. "And next, I'll play this nifty little spell card," Celeste said, holding it in between her fingers before playing it. "Card of Demise. This lets me draw until I'm holding five cards and since I'm only holding one, I get to draw four more. Of course," Celeste said as she drew her cards and arranged her hand so that she could properly see the images and text, "the tradeoff is that I have to discard my whole hand five turns later, but I plan on ending this duel before then." She pulled a card out of her hand. "Observe. Since your scapegoats are all earth-attribute monsters, I can special summon this monster without taking up my summon for the turn. Behold," Celeste declared as she played a powerful bird-warrior monster that was all white. "I special summon Alector, Soverign of Birds!" Celeste's white, bi-pedal creature had 2400 attack points.
"And that's not all," Celeste said. "I also play this monster card, 7 Colored Fish!" A tusked trout of many colors and 1800 attack points appeared on Celeste's side of the field. "Now, my monsters!" Celeste declared, "Wipe out Joey's Scapegoats!"
Joey watched much to his horror and Marik's delight as Celeste's monsters chewed through his scapegoats like freshly cooked lambchops.
"Joey!" Ibuki shouted in alarm. "Next time you should add Rosemary to your play. Maybe her sophisticated nature will let her be more merciful."
"Oh please, I despise lamb," Celeste said. "I prefer duck. In fact," Celeste said. "Now that I think about it, I don't particularly like mammalian meat unless its exotic or one hundred percent beef."
"Well aren't you just Miss Fancy and Rich. I should introduce you to a not-friend of mine. His name is Seto Kaiba. You two would get along great."
"That would be lovely," Celeste said, causing Joey's insult to backfire. "Kaiba's actually far more of a man than you could ever hope to be."
"Why you," Joey snarled.
"Getting riled up won't change the situation," Celeste said. "Look at the battlefield." She gave him a stern look. "You are completely boxed in with no way out. If you manage to summon a monster powerful enough to defend yourself, my Wave Motion Cannon will finish you off. And if you summon a spell or trap card to destroy Wave Motion Cannon, my monsters will obliterate you."
YES! Excellent work, Celeste. Wheeler is completely defenseless! Marik thought.
Celeste was thinking the same thing. That Rare Hunter gig is as good as mine.
"Holy crap!" Ibuki exclaimed. "She's right! Joey's completely screwed! It's like the Kobayashi Maru! No matter what he does it's a no-win scenario! Joey! You should've just blown it up when you had the chance, now you're against an adaptive A.I that'll counter your every move until you and your crew are completely dead and floating adrift in space like frozen dessert treats!"
Teá opened her mouth to speak, only to close it and shake her head. She was better off not addressing Ibuki's insane ramblings.
Of course, the only person that didn't think Joey stood a snowball's chance in hell: was Joey himself. "Celeste," he said, "I don't care what sort of insane trap you set for me. Cause as long as it's my turn, I'm gonna fight my way through any barriers, walls, spells, traps or whatever and get that winning solution!"
"You're all talk," Celeste remarked, "You have nothing. Just admit defeat and walk away with your dignity intact." She glanced aside. "There are fewer things I can stand less than someone that doesn't know when they're beaten. It's a checkmate solution, Joey."
"No it ain't!"
Celeste sighed. "Fine, I suppose you have cards that might help you survive a bit longer, but you can only draw one card. The chances of you having that exact card combination in the right order is—"
"Slim," Joey said. "I know, but I don't care about odds. You think you've got good luck because you're a good gambler? When I was first learning to duel, Yugi and his grandpa taught me a very important lesson. They taught me to have faith in my deck and about the heart of the cards. I believe in the deck I built and it ain't gonna let me down," Joey said as he held his hand on top of his deck and seemed to be praying to whatever god would listen for some kind of miracle.
"Just what on Earth is that supposed to mean? Faith in your deck? Heart of the cards?" Celeste asked. "Explain."
Joey opened his eyes. "The way I understand it," Joey said. "Having faith in the deck you made and faith in the cards within them can turn even a surefire defeat into a victory. Maybe there's a card in your deck you're just not thinking of or maybe you, through sheer willpower can pull out the card you need to win the duel. Most duelists figure, aw man that card must be buried deep inside my deck towards the bottom." Joey made a fist with his duel disk hand, "But a true duelist knows he can pull the right card as long as he's got heart!"
"Sounds to me like cheating sleight of hand," Celeste said dismissively, again playing with her hair.
"It ain't cheating! It's luck and faith!" Joey shot back.
Celeste gave Joey a focused look, paying special attention to his torso and fingers. "Very well," she said, "I'll be watching you carefully. I know all the best sleight of hand tricks in the world. If I think you've done anything fishy, I'll motion to have you disqualified."
"Ha! Joey doesn't have to cheat to win! He beat Ibuki didn't he?"
"That's because you're third-rate trash," Celeste commented dismissively. "Someone like you was never meant to walk the high heights I plan to."
"Boy those must be some extravagant heights," Ibuki said, more impressed by Celeste's claim than she was offended by her insult.
Celeste sighed calmly, figuring wasting her breath on Ibuki was a waste of time.
Joey then opened his mouth to speak in order to address Celeste's claims that he was all talk. "Just you watch!" He declared. "I'm turning this duel around!"
He drew the top card off his deck. Awesome! "I play Pot of Greed, letting me draw two cards."
"Oh yes, Pot of Greed," Celeste said, practically yawning. "It's not like I didn't figure you had that when I made my declaration."
Joey looked at the two cards he drew: Graverobber and Graceful Charity.
"Next I play Graceful Charity!"
Celeste's eyes stirred for a little bit. Graceful Charity following a Pot of Greed. It was possible, but probable? Not in the slightest.
Joey drew the three cards from the top of his deck and looked at them: Shield and Sword, Magical Arm Chain and Heavy Storm. Joey sighed. All three of these cards were useful, but he could only keep two at most and that would require discarding the card he originally had in his hand: Battleguard King.
Joey reluctantly sent it and Shield and Sword to the graveyard. Hopefully his luck would hold and he wouldn't regret discarding Shield and Sword later on. "It's time for you to see that I wasn't bluffing," Joey declared, "Go, Heavy Storm!"
Celeste was unfazed as the powerful gale destroyed her Wave Motion Cannon. "Now, I'll play two cards face-down," Joey declared, glancing down at his duel disk. He then glanced up at Celeste with a smug grin. "And end my turn."
"Joey's got no monsters on the field besides his last scapegoat, what's he thinking?" Namu wondered aloud.
"Haha, don't count a monsterless Joey out," Ibuki laughed. "He did the same thing with Ibuki and totally turned the tide against her."
"But that was you," Teá said. "Against Celeste…" she looked forlorn at the gambler, praying for Joey's success silently.
"I warned you about giving me another turn," Celeste said, drawing another card and holding it down and away from her duel disk. "And now you'll pay the price dearly. I activate Harpie's Feather Duster, destroying your two face-down cards."
"Oh no!" Teá exclaimed.
"Then I'll activate this: my Graverobber!" Joey declared. "This lets me steal a card from your graveyard and I pick Monster Reborn!"
"Even if you brought back Trance the Magic…" Celeste stopped herself, realizing she'd already made this mistake in her duel with Chiaki. "Oh, you clever little boy. You discarded a powerful monster with Graceful Charity just now, didn't you?"
"Well now, looks like someone's paying attention!" Joey declared. "I'm bringing my Battleguard King to the field in attack mode!"
The powerful, red monster appeared, the thick slab of stone it called a club held in one of its mighty hands. Standing tall and proud more than twice Joey's size, it had as much attack power as Blue-Eyes White Dragon for 3000.
"Woohoo! Look at Joey go!" Ibuki cheered.
"I must admit," Celeste said with a smirk. "I'm actually rather impressed. It would've been a poor tale to recount a highly anticipated battle of mine to have been finished so easily." She gave a head tilt and a smile to Joey. "Thank you for actually living up to my expectations a little, Joey." With a serious expression, Celeste then said, "I switch all of my monsters to defense mode." All of her monsters crouched or otherwise took a defensive posture. "Next, I shall place two cards face-down," she said, arming herself with a back-up plan. "Well, Joey, you've bought yourself some time, now let's see you do something with it."
"You got it," Joey said, drawing the top card of his deck with a smirk. "I'll start by playing this little number face-down onto the field." Joey said, playing the card he'd drawn face-down. "And next," he said, thrusting a fist forward. "I attack! Battleguard King, destroy Celeste's Phoenix Beast Gairuda!"
"As always you jump in without thinking, but that works for you I suppose," Celeste said. "Activate trap card: Negate Attack!"
Battleguard King's charge was ended when the beast came to a screeching halt. Joey frowned, almost biting his lip.
"Don't feel bad," Celeste said. "I'm only delaying the inevitable if I had to resort to such a basic tactic. You should feel proud of yourself. After all, you have three chances to crush me while I bide my time." Celeste drew the top card of her deck and smirked. "Well, perhaps that was a poor choice of words. It seems my luck hasn't failed me when I need it either. And unlike you I don't go attaching it to some inane philosophy." Celeste reached for her monster zone. "I sacrifice all three of my monsters in order to play a rare card I received in my previous duel. I play the almighty Wicked Dreadroot!"
A big, powerful green-skinned demon appeared with skeletal wings and fingers. It had 4000 attack points.
"Holy crap! That thing is stronger than Kaiba's Blue-Eyes!" Ibuki exclaimed.
"And unlike Kaiba's Blue-Eyes it can keep its superiority with a devastating special ability. While out on the field, all monsters besides itself lose half of their attack and defense points."
Wicked Dreadroot towered over Joey's Battleguard King, its evil aura emanating and reducing the warrior's attack power to 1500.
"It's over," Celeste said. "So much for your heart of the cards. Wicked Dreadroot, attack!" Celeste declared. "Take out Joey's Battleguard King along with the rest of his life points."
"Joey!" Ibuki and Teá declared in alarm at the same time.
Wicked Dreadroot's fists came down and destroyed Joey's monster.
"It's over," Celeste said.
"Wrong again," Joey declared, "I activate the trap card: Nutrient-Z!" Joey declared, revealing his face-down card.
Celeste's expression of cheer became one of sullen disappointment.
"Since your attack was gonna do over 2000 damage, I got to gain 4000 life points after my monster was destroyed. Not bad for something I just drew, am I right?" Joey's life points recalculated themselves to 3600, practically resetting the duel.
"You got lucky," Celeste noted.
"I was born lucky," Joey said with a cheesy grin and a thumb jerked at himself.
"You know," Celeste said with a small smile. "I can't help, but agree with that statement with the way this duel is playing out. Go ahead and draw, Joey. I'm actually enjoying this."
"You know what?" Joey asked rhetorically. "Me too, Celeste."
You won't be for long, Marik thought.
"I draw," Joey said. "Looks like my luck is holding. I play Roll of Fate! Depending on the number I roll, I get to draw that many cards from the top of my deck, but as a trade-off I gotta then send that many cards from the top of my deck to the graveyard."
"Quite the gamble," Celeste said. "I hope you're prepared to roll a 1."
"Always," Joey said to her. "Now go, Roll of Fate!"
The dice rolled to the ground and gave Joey an average three.
"Cool, three I can work with," Joey stated calmly and picked the cards up: Monster Energy Drain, Silver Dollar, and Flame Swordsman.
To the graveyard went Thunder King, Graceful Dice and Swordsman of Landstar.
Too bad I didn't roll a four, Joey thought.
"You look disappointed Joey," Celeste said, "Fate not smile upon you."
"I'll be fine," Joey said and played a card face-down. "I place one card face-down on the field and end my turn."
"Hmph, we'll see about that," Celeste said and drew the top card off of her deck. "Oh, look at that, my luck is holding too." She revealed the card she'd drawn to him. "Fairy Meteor Crush."
"Awwww, crap," Joey stated. That card was how he lost to Duke Devlin.
"And by equipping it to Wicked Dreadroot, any monster it destroys in defense position will cause you to take battle damage anyway. Now, Wicked Dreadroot, attack Scapegoat and end this folly."
"I don't think so," Joey said. "I activate Silver Dollar!" he declared, revealing a trap card with a silver coin as the picture. "This protects any monster on my side of the field from being destroyed by an attack and, as a bonus, I don't take any battle damage either."
Celeste was quiet, holding her fist by her mouth again. She was quiet for almost half a minute before speaking again, "I must admit I always wondered what would happen if I clashed with someone whose luck was in the same range as my own. Now I know and I must say, I'm quite intrigued. Keep the good luck coming, Joey," Celeste chuckled. "I might be inclined to upgrade you to a C-rank person."
"Keep your ranks to yourself," Joey said. "You doing anything else?"
"Just this," Celeste said. "I place Dark Valkyria on the battlefield in face-up defense position." A monster with purple skin and dressed like a valkyrie appeared, crouched on the ground. It had 1800 attack points and 1050 defense points. However, split in half that came to 900 attack and 525 because of Wicked Dreadroot.
Joey held his hand over his duel disk, fingers shaking a little. Come on, Heart of the Cards, I need you right now. I'm not gonna survive another turn without some good old-fashioned Joey-style luck. With a deep breath and a low-volume grunt, Joey pulled the top card off his deck. "All right! That's exactly what I need to turn this duel around!"
Celeste could only smile. This was certainly the most amusing duel she'd ever played in her entire career. "I play Monster Reborn!" Joey declared. "This let's be bring back Thunder King from the graveyard!" The giant kaiju appeared in a storm of lightning and mayhem, roaring with each of its three heads.
"EEEEEEEEE!" Ibuki shrieked happily, forcing Teá to cover her ears and Namu to recoil to one side. "That's my card! JOEEEEEEEEEEEY!" she was so happy to see Joey using Thunder King for a comeback play.
"Ah, so that was something that got sent to the graveyard with Roll of Fate, yes?" Celeste asked.
"Yeah, and the funny thing is, if I had drawn any more cards, I would've had to send Monster Reborn to my graveyard."
"That is certainly true. How fortunate for you," Celeste chuckled.
Why is that witch enjoying this? Wheeler probably has a plan to destroy her Wicked Dreadroot? Does she truly not see what's wrong with that.
"I activate my spell card: Monster Energy Drainer!" Joey declared. "This lets me target one monster on the field and make its attack points become zero until the end of this turn. And I choose Wicked Dreadroot!"
A ghostly hand reached through the card and grasped hold of Celeste's Wicked Dreadroot, bringing its attack power all the way to 0.
"Now, Thunder King!" Joey shouted, "Attack Wicked Dreadroot! Triple Lightning Destruction Blast!"
Thunder King reared its heads back and annihilated Celeste's monster. Fortunately Wicked Dreadroot's ability was still in effect and Celeste only lost life points equal to half of Thunder King's attack points, but it was still a devastating 1650 life point loss, bringing her life points down to 2250.
"Next, I play one card face-down on the field," Joey said, performing the appropriate action, "And end my turn. Whatdya think of that, Celeste?" he asked, rubbing his thumb against his nose.
"I'd say that was most impressive," Celeste said. "It's too bad though."
"What's too bad?" Joey asked, looking confused.
"That I already anticipated the possibility that Dreadroot would be destroyed." She drew the top card from her deck. "For now, I switch Dark Valkyria to attack position and activate her special ability. This lets me raise her attack power by 300 points." Dark Valkyria switched to a standing position and its attack points climbed to 2100. "Only to remove those attack points so I can destroy one monster on your side of the field, namely, your Thunder King."
"Aw, no," Joey stated.
"Oh, I'm afraid so," Celeste said. "Dark Valkyria, unleash the wrath of dark heaven and obliterate his kaiju."
With a downward tip of her index finger, Dark Valkyria unleashed a powerful dark blast of energy from heaven, wiping out Thunder King and sending it to the graveyard.
"And with that eyesore out of the way," Celeste said. "I now attack your scapegoat, finally getting rid of it from the playing field."
Dark Valkyria used a much less impressive dark blast to destroy Joey's monster. "Lastly, I shall play a card face-down." Celeste now had two. "Your turn, Joey,"
"Kay," Joey said, feeling a little dismayed. He drew the top card off of his deck. "I place one card face-down and end my turn."
"How unfortunate," Celeste said. She drew the top card off of her deck. "Since it has been five turns since I played Card of Demise, I must regrettably send my entire hand to the graveyard." She did so. "But with things as in my favor as they are, that's hardly a problem. Dark Valkyria, attack Joey directly!"
"And I activate my new trap card: Trap Hole of Spikes!" Joey declared, opening a chasm below Dark Valkyria's feet, skewering Celeste's monster as it reached out to her with its dying breath and lifeless eyes before disappearing.
"Barbaric," Celeste scoffed as her life points fell to 1350 due to the secondary effect of Trap Hole of Spikes. "Well, since I have no other cards to play this turn, you can go, Joey."
"Don't mind if I do," Joey said and drew the top card from his deck. "Heh heh, perfect. I play Rocket Warrior in attack mode!" The rocket shaped chibi warrior appeared. It had just enough attack points to take out Celeste with a direct attack. Rocket Warrior, attack!"
"I don't think so!" Celeste declared. "I activate Ring of Destruction, which will destroy your Rocket Warrior and cause a field-wield explosion that will cause 1500 life points of damage."
"What?" Joey gasped as Rocket Warrior struggled and staggered to get the ring off. "But that means you'll lose."
"No, I won't because I have this," Celeste said, revealing her face-down card: "My Ring of Defense. Now my life points are safe." Rocket Warrior exploded and Joey lost 1500 life points, bringing him down to 2100.
"It's my turn," Celeste said and drew the top card off of her deck. "I place Mystical Elf in face-up defense position and end my turn."
"My turn," Joey said. "And I'm also gonna play a monster in defense mode too: my Tiny Guardian!" Joey declared, letting his monster show up crouching and looking at the elegant Mystical Elf.
"My turn," Celeste said as she drew the top card off of her deck and looked at it. "How unfortunate for you that I played a monster first. I tribute my Mystical Elf to play Granmarg, the Rock Monarch!" A gigantic, golden creature appeared, slamming into the ground like living statue. "And since Granmarg was summoned by sacrificing a monster, I get to destroy one spell or trap card on your side of the field."
"Aw, no," Joey gasped.
"Too bad," Celeste said with a smirk. "Granmarg, destroy Tiny Guardian! Rock Arm Pummeling!" Granmarg's arm came swinging down and flattened Joey's Tiny Guardian, destroying it. "It's your turn."
"Man, who would've thought this duel would come down to just what Joey and Celeste could draw?" Ibuki wondered aloud. "Only lucky people like them could have such an intense duel. Well, except for Yugi and Kaiba, I suppose," Ibuki said with a smile.
"It really is close," Namu said, arms folded, "For every strong move Celeste makes, Joey counters just as hard and the same holds true for the reverse of that statement."
"Well something's gotta give and I have faith in Joey," Teá said.
"Me too!" Ibuki exclaimed.
Namu remained quiet, keeping his eyes glued to the battlefield.
Joey drew the top card of his deck. "I play Arduous Decision!" Joey declared and pulled the top two cards off of his deck, showing the back of them to Celeste. "See these two cards? You get to pick one of 'em. If it's a monster card, I get to summon it and add the other card to my hand. If it's not a monster card, then both cards go to the graveyard."
"Those are the top two cards off of your deck, yes?"
"That's right," Joey said.
"Well then, that means you wouldn't be playing this charade unless you were holding at least one monster card."
"Who knows? Maybe I'm bluffing," Joey said.
Celeste sighed irritably. "If you were bluffing you wouldn't suggest the idea." She then became quiet and studied Joey's hands. She was looking for any signs of body language that would let her tell which card was which or if they were, somehow, both monster cards. The way Celeste saw it, she had a 25% chance of actually picking a spell or trap card. After all, based on Joey's statement, the top two cards of his deck could both be monster cards.
Celeste raised her arm and drew her hand back a little, making it seem like she'd made her decision. However, she made her movement slow and deliberate, watching for any kind of tell that would let her see if Joey would give away which card was which. Unfortunately for her, he actually had a really good poker face.
Ugh, Celeste thought, I hate this type of gambling. Even with her amazing luck, Celeste disliked games that relied solely on chance when she could avoid them. They had their fun and excitement, but she hated playing them when the stakes were this high. Sure, she'd won plenty of those in the past, but that didn't mean she liked them. And what was especially bad was that Joey's luck equaled her own. It wasn't just some inanimate object or no-name dealer she was gambling against, but someone with equal luck and skill to her. Right now her odds were truly 1 in 4 of a best case scenario and she could do nothing to improve those odds.
With nothing else for it and time of the essence, Celeste resigned herself to a completely blind guess. "I pick your right hand," she said, holding onto the hope that her luck was greater than Joey's."
"You sure?" Joey asked with a smirk.
"Don't think you can confuse me," Celeste said, annoyed. "I made a decision and I will not go back on it."
"Well if you're that sure," Joey said.
"Hmph," Celeste said, turning her head to the side.
Joey flipped the card around, revealing Goblin Attack Force. "Ooooh, bet that's gotta hurt. Go! Goblin Attack Force!"
The army of Goblins appeared on the battlefield.
"Are you quite serious? "This will hurt"?" Celeste asked, mocking Joey. "Those wretched creatures are barely within a draw of Granmarg, yet you act like…" she cut herself off again. "That's an equip-type magic card in your hand, isn't it?" she asked.
"Yup!" Joey declared. "Go, Lightning Blade!"
Celeste watched as the leader of Joey's attack force obtained a blade sparking with lightning, raising the entire force's attack power to 3100. "Goblin Attack Force! Attack!"
Celeste sighed, watching as Granmarg was pinned down by Joey's goblins as the leader sliced it in half with the lightning blade. Her life points fell to 650. After that, Joey's goblins went to sleep, automatically switching to defense mode.
"Such foul-smelling wretched creatures are so repugnant I consider them F-class," Celeste said and drew the top card of her deck. "And with this, I will see them personally slain. Evocator Chevalier!" A warrior clad in fiery red armor with 1900 attack points appeared on the battlefield. "Ah, my knight, so good to see you. Destroy those goblins for me, would you please?"
Celeste's chevalier nodded and used fire magic to complete burn the goblins to ashes.
"Thank you," Celeste said, refusing to look at the ashes.
"Wow, you really hate goblins, don't you?" Ibuki asked. Celeste did not answer her.
"My move," Joey said and drew the top card from his deck. He looked a bit freaked out.
"Oh, what's this? Did your luck not hold?" Celeste asked. "How miserably unfortunate."
Joey sighed. "I play Baby Dragon in defense mode. Sorry little guy."
"You seem so emotionally attached, I actually feel bad," Celeste said and drew the top card from her deck. "Oh wait, no I don't. I play Phantom Gryphon in attack mode."
Joey gulped.
"Evocator Chevalier, attack!" Celeste declared, ridding the field of Baby Dragon.
"And now, Phantom Gryphon, attack Joey's life points directly!" Celeste declared. It was the only successful direct attack of the duel as Joey was bowled over by the attack and his life points fell all the way to a mere 100. "I'd say this duel is all wrapped up," Celeste said, scratching her chin and looking a bit contemplative. "However, with the way this duel has been going, you might surprise me. And actually," Celeste chuckled, "I think I'd like that. Surprise me, Joey. I'd hate for the fun to end just yet."
What is this witch saying? It's like she's asking to lose! Marik thought irately. Is she actually, truly enjoying this match?
"Don't come to regret that," Joey declared and drew the top card from his deck. Seeing what it was, he resolutely declared, "I play a monster face-down in defense position and end my turn."
"Very well," Celeste said and drew the top card off of her deck. "I suppose I'll attack first," Celeste said. "Just in case. Phantom Gryphon, take out Joey's face-down monster!"
Celeste's monster attack with a screeching charge, but Joey smirked as his face-down monster was revealed to be Fiber Jar. The look of surprise on Celeste's face was worthy of posting on social media.
"Surprise," Joey said with a smug smirk. "Now we gotta shuffle all of our cards, even the ones in our graveyard, back into our decks and then we draw a new hand of five cards."
Celeste looked at her hand. "Not a bad play, Joey, but too bad you've just re-armed me with powerful cards. I re-summon Phantom Gryphon to the field and place three cards face-down." Celeste played all four cards. "And before you accuse me of cheating because I didn't shuffle well, rest assured, I have three Phantom Gryphons." Celeste said.
"I wasn't accusing you of anything," Joey said. "I draw." He smirked when he saw what was in his hand. "Celeste, thanks for the duel, but it's all over now. I play Heavy Storm!"
"No, you don't!" Celeste declared, "Activate Dust Tornado, allowing me to destroy it."
"All right, then here's my other spell destroying card. I play Giant Trunade! So put those cards back in your hand where they came from!"
Celeste pulled the cards out of her spell and trap zone. "Impressive, Joey, but fortunately that will only be a minor setback with Phantom Gryphon on the field. It is among the most powerful monsters that can be summoned normally. So unless you somehow are planning to summon First of the Dragons again to attack, I'll just play them face-down next turn."
"Nah, I don't have polymerization in my hand," Joey said. "But you know what I do have?" He flipped a spell card in his hand to show it to Celeste. "One of these." It was Shield and Sword.
"Shield and Sword?" Celeste gasped. It was the very bane of Celeste's early game strategy. Most of her monsters had way higher attack than they did defense and in the case of her Phantom Gryphon, it had absolutely 0 defense points.
"But first say hello to a good buddy of mine, Swordsman of Landstar!" Joey played the weird looking swordsman that had 500 attack points and 1200 defense points. "And with Shield and Sword, its attack and defense are swapped just like your monster's!"
I can't believe this, Celeste thought.
"Swordsman of Landstar!" Joey shouted, "Attack Celeste's Phantom Gryphon with Landstar Sword Strike!"
Celeste watched her monster be destroyed by Joey's monster and while everyone was focused on the explosion of Phantom Gryphon into shards of light, they all missed the very brief smile Celeste had on her face. So brief, in fact that by the time the hologram projectors ceased functioning, it was completely gone from her face.
She lost, Marik thought. How disappointing.
"Well," Celeste said, maintaining her dignity. "These things happen I suppose. Congratulations, Joey."
"Wow, you're taking this a lot better than Ibuki thought you would," Ibuki said, looking surprised. "Ibuki thought you'd be ranting up a storm at how unfair this is."
"Quite," Celeste said, "Because you know what I love most about gambling?" she asked, chuckling sinisterly. Suddenly a bunch of Rare Hunters began walking out of the alleyways like hidden zombies. They were all chuckling as they honed in on their target: one Joseph Wheeler. "When you're in good with the house," Celeste chuckled so sinisterly. "They throw out your annoying competition."
Well, well, Marik thought. Perhaps you are not entirely worthless after all, Celestia Ludenburg. He watched as one of the Rare Hunters grabbed Joey's shoulder.
"Get your stinkin' hands off me, ya freak," Joey said and then turned around and laid the guy flat with a punch to his face.
Marik, still pretending to be the average joe, Namu, said, "Celeste, you're a Rare Hunter?"
"Can't be, she ain't wearing a freaky cloak," Joey said.
"Well I suppose I'll have to give you that detail," Celeste said, using her finger brace to scratch her chin. "I suppose you could call this," she gave Joey a sweet smile. "Collusion?"
More Rare Hunters surrounded Joey as one grabbed Teá. "Hey! Get off me!" she shouted.
"Ta-ta," Celeste said, still with that sweet smile on her face as she calmly walked away onto the sidewalk. "See you at the finals, Joey. If you make it that is."
As Celeste disappeared behind the advancing cloaks of the Rare Hunters, Joey sprang to action, punching, hooking, jabbing, axe and roundhouse kicking his way through Rare Hunters as best he could. However, it wasn't long before he got outnumbered, two of the Rare Hunters restraining him as a third punched him in the gut.
As another Rare Hunter grabbed and restrained Teá's arms behind her back, Ibuki looked quizzically around, head darting back and forth wondering what to do. Her decision was made for her when Teá shouted loudly, "RUN, IBUKI!"
"Do not let her escape," Celeste commanded sternly, as Ibuki began to charge out of the alleyway and through the streets. No less than three Rare Hunters pursued, but Ibuki was way faster and, like a street rat, pushed shoved and ducked her way through the city, managing to leap through a street vendor's cart in between the banner and the food, even grabbing some Yakitori as she leaped through.
Tucking into her roll as she put the food in her mouth, Ibuki landed on her feet, crouching and prepared to take off.
"I hope you plan on paying for that young lady," the street vendor, a bald bespectacled old man in an apron said to her.
Ibuki quickly pulled a 10,000-yen bill out of her skirt. "Keep the change," she said and took off, getting lost in a crowd of people.
"There she is!" One of the Rare Hunters exclaimed, seeing Ibuki disappear in the distance. "After her!"
The three men pursued, only to lose sight of her as she ran into the park. "Where'd she go?" they asked, looking around.
"Let's ask that guy," one of the men said, pointing at a fat guy in black under armor, a red jacket and a red baseball cap with goggles on top of his hat with blue jeans. He was sitting on a park bench with a stick of Yakitori. "Hey, fatty," they said, walking up to him, "You seen a teenage girl pass through here about five and a half feet tall, crazy hair and a sailor outfit?"
"Crazy hair?" the fat guy asked, "You're going to have to be more specific."
"Forget it, if you saw her, you'd know," one of the hunters said.
"Come on guys, it's Wheeler that Marik wanted anyway and that chick's out of the tournament," the smartest and skinniest of the trio said. "Let's go." The Rare Hunters trudged away. After all, what could Ibuki do really?
Munching and swallowing his Yakitori, the fat man then said, once the hunters had cleared the part, "The coast is clear."
From out of a bush behind him, Ibuki popped out, letting out a breath like she'd just come up from the ocean depths for air. She had leaves and twigs stuck to her "horns".
"Thanks for saving me, stranger," Ibuki said.
"No problem, Ibuki," the fat guy said.
Ibuki gasped. "You know my name. Are you some sort of spy?"
"Ibuki, it's me," the fat man said. "Er, hang on a second." He stood up and took his hat off, ripping off a mask of some kind and replacing it with a rosy-cheeked, lighter haired visage.
"Ryota? Is that you?" Ibuki asked, alarmed.
Ryota, or more specifically, the Imposter in Ibuki's class she thought was Ryota, rubbed the back of his head, "In all my abundant glory," he said.
Ibuki laughed. "No wonder you were so quick to help Ibuki. You'd do anything to help a classmate in trouble. What're you doing dressed so funny anyway?" she asked.
"Never mind me," "Ryota" said. "Who were those men after you?"
Ibuki poked at her scalp with her index fingers. "They called themselves Rare Hunters. They're like super bad news." Ibuki's expression of shock and agony appeared on her face again. "Crap! Ibuki can't stand here talking! She has to go get reinforcements!"
"Reinforcements?" Ryota asked. "What are you talking about?"
"Ibuki's new friends were just kidnapped!" Ibuki explained. "So she's gotta run really really fast to get Akane and Nekomaru so we can totally bust into Marik's secret villain hideout lair and bust out the old one-two," Ibuki said throwing a straight punch and then an uppercut while winking.
"Allow me to help," Ryota said.
"You sure you can keep up with Ibuki?" Ibuki asked.
"Hey, I might be hefty, but I can run," Ryota said. "Besides, you're going in the wrong direction if you're trying to get back to school."
"…Oh."
"Follow me," Ryota said. "We'll help your new friends. And you can explain the situation to me on the way."
"Yeah, sounds like a plan," Ibuki said and the two took off running.
As Ibuki retreated to begin a rescue mission, Celeste had other plans to still enact. With Teá restrained and Joey down for the count, that just left Namu. A pair of Rare Hunters got on either side of him, but Celeste approached quickly. "Allow me, gentleman," she said and, with a firm backhand, slapped Namu across the face.
"Namu!" Teá gasped.
"Gag, her would you?" Celeste asked. "And a blindfold as well. She mustn't know where we are taking her." She looked at Namu. "As for you, you're coming with me." She dragged the blond by the upper arm into the alleyway and threw him against the wall as the Rare Hunters carried out her latest orders.
"What do you want with me?" Namu asked, sounding frightened.
"Oh drop the act, Marik," Celeste said coldly. "It's quite tiresome. You can't lie to the Queen of Liars."
Marik, finding he didn't need to cower to a business partner, pulled out the Millennium Rod, holding it close to his chest and said, "Well, well, well, what gave me away, exactly?" He was intrigued by Celeste's success where Ibuki, Joey, and Teá had failed.
"Well let's see, as if you locking gazes with me before you lured Joey and the others into your trap wasn't enough, if you were acting as Joey's friend, you could've afforded to cheer for him a little more to keep up appearances. That's not a lot by itself, it was a little suspicious. But most importantly," Celeste said with a smile. "Your kindness is just as insincere as my own. You did your best to keep calm, but your eyebrow was practically straining to look non-threatening." Celeste stroked her chin again. "Oh, and I suppose Ibuki and Teá are just unobservant, but you kept glaring on occasion for no explicable reason, especially while looking my way and only when the ball seemed to be out of my court. Now why on Earth would someone affiliated with my opponent get mad at me for losing. Of course even with all of that said," Celeste said and gave Marik the most pleasant of fake smiles. "I didn't confirm my suspicions until just now when you gave yourself away."
"Hmph," Marik said, scowling.
Celeste chuckled. "All that talk about only meeting me in person only if I beat Joey and look what fell into my lap."
"So if you knew who I was, why did you hit me?" Marik asked.
"Oh, I had to act convincingly in front of Joey, Ibuki and Teá of course." She smiled a little, but something about it seemed insincere, especially with the way she was covering her mouth. "My apologies for the pain. So, shall we talk business?"
Marik smiled. "Sure, why not? A pleasure to be working with you, Celestia Ludenburg."
"A pleasure to be working with you too, Marik," Celeste said. "I hope this will prove to be a…" she chuckled sinisterly, "lucrative partnership."
(A/N: Ohhh snap! Celeste just pulled a fast one on Joey. I dunno, does this qualify for tropes as a Batman Gambit? Next chapter it's back to focusing on Nagito and after that: a certain blonde rears her ugly head. We'll come back to the Celeste subplot later. There's a twist in it I don't think any of you are going to see coming. Well…aside from my good friend that motivated me to write this chapter XD. Something tells me though none of you saw this going down the way it did though.
Next chapter will also have one of my favorite jokes in the entire story up to this point, but you're going to have to be a fan of Yu-gi-oh The Abridged Series to get it. Anyway, I hope to be into the Noah arc before September. In fact, with any luck, we could be done with Battle City right around the time V3: Killing Harmony comes out. Anyone know if you can pre-order on Steam, because I specifically took the day of release and the three days before it off so I can play it ad nauseum.
One a side note: Monster Energy Drainer is actually the anime version of energy drain. Look it up on the Yu-gi-oh wikia. I just didn't want to confuse people since there actually is a card called energy drain now and it having widely different effects in the game than the anime would have accusations hurled at me for not doing research. Can't have that. Anyway, with that said, until next time, as always, from all of me, to all of you, let your hearts stay human and your wrath draconic. Ja ne!)