Chapter 17: Psych-Part 1
Hey everybody, I'm back and with an extra-long chapter not created by me, but my Beta-Reader Nacoma23 him/herself. This one involves some T.V. series that I don't really know, but should be entertaining enough as we see what Nacoma23 put extra work into it. Now then, let's see how our audience reacts to it. Especially when its characters that are rarely used in the multiverse setting.
Also got a crossover story known as Next Avengers Heroes of Remnant by EvaShinobiKaiserKnight
But I should also mention that this will be the first 2-Parter event as it's really long. So, enjoy.
(Beta-Reader's note: This one was actually suggested by one of the reviewers.)
"Okay, everybody," Mayden told his audience as the next world was coming up. "Right now I'm going to introduce a world where we will see both familiar faces and original characters."
"Original Characters," Blake questioned, her cat ears perking cutely at the term. "Can you explain what that means?"
"That's right; you did mention "Original Characters" some time ago." Ironwood recalled, remembering the Gamer-world featuring Torchwick.
"Yeah, give us the info, man!" Nora cried out with Mayden chuckling.
"Alright, sure," The Keeper said. "Ahem, basically original characters are individuals who don't exist in your universe, but do in others. There have been many creators who've written about these characters, especially how their presence affects the timeline and plot, usually for better or worse."
Mayden knew that Original Characters caused all sorts of changes. Usually they helped out team RWBY or other certain characters to stop the plot from getting worse. Of course, there were some OC characters who did the exact opposite, usually making things worse for just about everybody by being either cruel, or abusing their power.
"In any case, I should also mention that, due to the length of this viewing, this will be a two-part event." Mayden then explains telling that the world they will be seeing is a bit longer than the other worlds.
"That sounds interesting." Yang said already liking that they'll be seeing this world a bit longer. Kinda like a show that was an extra hour long and had many parts in it. That sounded pretty sweet to here.
"A two-parter, huh, what do you think this world will be like, Ren?" Jaune asks his friend who simply shrugged.
"No idea. But at least this world may be a bit more peaceful." They've seen their fair share of simple peaceful worlds, but also war torn ones and blood. Even though Ren could calm himself, that didn't mean he liked seeing such fierce battles time and time again. So hopefully this world will be much nicer.
"A regular world, huh," Mercury began only to groan, "That sounds boring."
He just wanted to see more action.
"Don't worry, Mercury, this one will have comedy, potentially painful comedy." Mayden reassured the assassin. Mercury grinned, while not a violent world, anything involving people in pain was a source of comedy for him. He hoped this world will be as funny as their host implied.
"Oh boy, comedy..." Emerald mockingly praised, waving a finger in the air. If she could choose a world, she'd rather it be a dramatic or perhaps involved romance. Comedy was nice, but it wasn't something she entirely enjoyed.
"Huh," Cinder was a bit the same, also not seeing any point in comedy. Maybe this world will provide a surprise, but she doubted it.
"Hopefully it's one where I get to be top dog again." Cardin chuckled, summoning a nice tub of popcorn and a few hot dogs. Everybody else called upon their meals, ready to see what world they will watch. Each guest wondered what familiar face may appear and what their situation will be. The screen came to life ready to answer them.
The Screen came to life and the first image to be shown was that of a large, three-story hotel known as the STAY'N SAVE Motor Inn. It was a bright and beautiful day in San Barb, a coastal city located on the northeastern coast of Sanus, just north of Vale. There was not a cloud in the sky and the temperature was warm. However, beneath the picturesque weather, a dark deal was being made within the hotel.
Thankfully, the diligent officers of the SBPD were already on the scene.
"The police are there, thank the gods they've come." Ironwood said in relief, pleased that the local police force were already on the case. On the other side Roman groaned not liking the boys and blue ready to ruin to fun of a bad guy.
'Hmm, I wonder what crime is being committed.' The thief wondered as he paid attention to the strange world everyone was looking at. It seemed like Remnant, but had additions he never saw before. Maybe he should check north of Vale again, if he ever had the chance.
Inside one of the many hotel rooms, a command center had been prepared for a stakeout. Gathered around a table, the team of officers watched live video feed from the hidden cameras they placed in another room. The video on the monitor showed two men discussing a deal, one that the police suspected was a drug deal. The leading officers on this case were Detectives Carlton Lassiter, twenty year veteran of the force, and his partner, Dew Gayl.
"Come on, Niño," said Detective Lassiter, "Show us the goods."
Carlton addressed his fellow officers, "Listen up, the minute Niño reveals his stash, we move."
Suddenly, the officers heard a knocking on the perp's door. The criminals on camera turn their attention to their hotel room door, murmuring about who would be bothering them.
"Did one of them call for room service?" Dew asked, watching the feed with renewed interest.
"Hey, wasn't she one of the competitors from Vytal?" Nora said recalling that girl.
"Yes, Neptune and Sun's team beat hers." It seemed that Mayden was right in that they would see familiar faces. Ren just wondered who else will appear
She then heard the door open and a familiar voice warmly greet the perp's, "I have your lunch, Mr. Baez."
Then, much to her shock, a black-haired, tanned and grinning young man she knew quite well entered the room. It was Oscar Pines, who was wearing a server's uniform and pushing a cloth-covered food cart. Oscar stopped near the bed, placing the cart right at the foot of it. The two criminals immediately went to argue with the man, lambasting him for bringing them food when they had not ordered anything.
"Woah, it's me!" Oscar shocked upon seeing his double. And also questioning what he was doing there, and if he had a decent role in this. Hopefully he wasn't going to be just some server and then leave like that...Even the boy wanted some screen time.
"That's Oscar!" Ruby said a bit surprised seeing the boy appearing a bit more... grown. Her eyes stared in amazement at how much Oscar had grown.
"What's the matter, Ruby, see something you like?" Yang teased her younger sibling, whom quickly replied "No!"
Though she did take a few peeks at Oscar. It should be reminded that Ruby is still a young girl who had a passing interest in, well, anything that wasn't a weapon.
"Hmph," Weiss saw Ruby's reaction and just turned around with a pout.
"You've got to be kidding me." Lassiter groused, wondering what that idiot Pines was doing. He then tempted fate by asking, "Can this get any more ridiculous?"
"Wait for it." Roman grinned with Neo smiling as well.
As if the universe was answering his rhetorical question, a head poked through the food cart's drape. Crawling from his hiding place, a young man with white hair and arctic blue eyes, wearing casual clothes made himself known. It was none other than Whitley Schnee, Psychic Detective and the one person whom Lassiter hated the most in the world. The detective stared at the screen in irritation and lamented, "I was wrong."
"And me?!" Whitley had to admit, he didn't expect himself to show up. And considering how those detectives were staring, it would appear he would have an extra role with this Oscar fella in this world.
"A Schnee in casual clothing, strange, but fitting," Adam chuckled with a smirk. A few others were also giggling at what Whitley was wearing. The boy had never been seen in clothing such as those. The boy just ignored their insulting words.
'Whatever. If anything, I pull it off well.' He thought to ease his slightly bruised ego.
"What exactly is Whitley's role in this?" Weiss said out loud to the entity.
"You'll see." Mayden replied back at her. "All I'll say is that both Whitley and Oscar in this universe are rather... unorthodox and interesting compared to other people in this dimension." That got people interested, while also satisfying Whitley and Oscar that they did have big roles.
Whitley and Oscar were glad that they were the focus this time. No more RWBY, Roman, Jaune, Cardin, Blake, or others hogging the spotlight. It was their time to shine.
"Oh, no..." Dew whispered in fear. Unbeknownst to her partner, she had her very own relationship with the department's regular psychic detective. She and Whitley were dating.
Whitley instantly spat out his drink. Normally, he would have done much better holding it in, yet naturally hearing this grown up version of him was dating this girl from Shade surprised him. The boy's face immediately blushed up a storm.
He wasn't alone in his shock, as Winter and Weiss spat out whatever they had in their mouths, too. If their father had been here, he'd have done the same. Even their mother would have spat her drink out and she was an alcoholic.
"Wow, okay, this suddenly got interesting." Yang said a bit amused. She then told Weiss with a teasing tone, "Gotta say, Weiss, your little brother really grew up."
"Don't test me, Xiao-Long!" Weiss groaned at her teammate's attempt to rile her up. Whitley, having heard Yang's words, just drank some cold water, in order to cool his increasingly heating cheeks.
"You said it." Qrow smiled quickly taking out his scroll to take a picture. Winter spitting her food like that is an exceedingly rare thing, and possibly an opportunity he'd never have again.
"Oh, boy," Ironwood will have to deal with Qrow later. Still, he had to admit he'd never seen Winter act like this. The Schnee were many things, but they always kept a tight grip on their emotions. Never did he see anyone from the family make an expression like that.
The only one not happy was Glynda, who had been sitting in front of the three siblings. She was soaked in the very beverages that the Schnee Sibling. She hoped there was a laundromat in this strange dimension.
Roman laughed with Neo doing the same. This was comedy gold. Still, even he can admit that he was surprised that the littlest Schnee brat was dating! That was definitely something that got the rumor mill running. People tend to pay good money for that kind of juicy information.
They watched as Whitley crawled away from the food cart to the side of the bed, disappearing from the view of the camera. Seconds later, he stood up, hefting a black duffel bag with his left arm, which he promptly tossed onto the bed while shouting, "AHA!"
Whitley palmed his face, already suspecting his alternative counterpart wasn't all that bright.
The sudden action jolted the two criminals, who promptly turned to look at the newest intruder. The duo promptly pulled out their weapons, aiming them at the young man. Dew turned to her partner and urgently said, "We should in get in there!"
"Eh, just hold on there," Lassiter waved her off, "Keep- keep going."
"Something tells me that guy doesn't like you two." Tock pointed out with the boys grudgingly agreeing. The man's face was that of someone who wouldn't mind if a person got hurt, especially those that caused trouble.
The detective was not going to stop a week-long stakeout without getting any evidence of a drug deal being made. The two idiots' presence may be unwanted, but it might work well in the end. He had learned long ago that Whitley Schnee had a way of getting under people's skins, breaking them down until they broke and confessed, in his own unorthodox way. Plus, there was a chance either he or Pines will get shot in the leg. Either way, Carlton Lassiter wins.
On one hand, Whitley began liking that his other self was very effective at his job and Oscar felt the same. On the other hand, both boys didn't want their counterparts to risk getting shot.
"This pretty much sums up James and Qrow's entire relationship." Glynda muttered, using her semblance to remove food and beverages the Schnee siblings spat on her. Unfortunately, she couldn't get rid of it all.
"That sounds about right." Ironwood agreed with no hint of regret. While he didn't exactly want Qrow dead, he wouldn't be shedding any tears if Qrow broke a leg or two.
"Screw you, tin man!" Qrow shot back.
He listened as the psychic detective, despite the guns pointing in his direction, grilled the criminals, "We were not under the impression that you would be armed."
Oscar spoke up and accusingly asked Niño, "You're selling these prescription drugs right out of this hotel room?"
Niño turned to him and offhandedly replied, "Yeah, sure."
"Did you get that?" Lassiter asked over the radio to the officer handling the recording equipment.
The officer on the other line confirmed the recording. Lassiter then ordered, "Let's move."
But just as they were about to proceed, they watch as Whitley swiped a glass of water from the food cart, splashing the liquid into Niño's face. Caught off guard by the sudden action, the criminal lost his focus, allowing the psychic to reach for the pistol in his head. Whitley tried to pry the weapon from Niño's hand, but the criminal's grip proved too strong. The two got into a tussle, at which point the weapon went off, shooting a hidden camera and disrupting the live feed.
"What are the odds?" Ruby asked in all seriousness.
"Super low," Blake said, surprised the bullet hit the exact spot the camera was located.
"Wish I could do that." Roman wished he had such luck when he was alive.
"Crap!" Lassiter exclaimed, as he Lassiter and Gayl jumped into action, sprinting over to the suspect's rooms.
The screen changed over to the suspect's room, with Whitley holding a pistol, aiming it at Niño's partner, ordering with a forceful tone. "Don't move, don't you frickin' move!"
"A Schnee with a gun... that's new." Ironwood observed, with even the siblings themselves unsure how to take in this information.
"Does he even know how to work that gun?" Winter asks. Mayden gave her a short "So-So" in response. Whitley immediately began fearing for his life.
Then the door was busted open. Lassiter and Gayl ran inside, their pistols out for a potential firefight, with the older detective shouting, "SBPD!"
Whitley and Oscar, who had tackled Niño onto the bed, looked at the Detectives in surprise. Whitley was the first to speak, greeting the older detective with his personal nickname for the man, "Lassie."
Whitley grinned, "We totally caught the bad guys."
Unamused, Lassie stepped over and snatched the pistol out of the Schnee's hands, admonishing him with a harshly delivered, "What were you thinking? You crashed our stakeout!"
Whitley, unbothered by the man's tone, simply replied, "You're welcome."
"Yep, just like Qrow and James." Ozpin said feeling that young Whitley and Lassie were like his comrades in many ways. Being at each other's throats was one of them.
As the detectives moved to arrest the perps, Oscar got up and scooted over to his best friend. The two men then bumped their fists with victorious smiles, congratulating themselves for another job well-done. They were sure to get some mad props for this case.
"I wouldn't count on it." Ironwood whispered softly. If Lassie was anything like him, those two would get something else. Meanwhile, Oscar and Whitley just stared at each other... friends?
'That would be a first.' Weiss thought.
Later at the police station, the two friends were strolling through the main office, discussing what their reward for the job will be.
"You think the chief called us in to congratulate us on our bust yesterday" Oscar asked, wearing a finely-pressed, tucked-in buttoned up shirt with khaki pants, his typical attire. His clothes showed him to be professional and well-organized, as befitting his work as a pharmaceutical salesman.
"Most definitely, I'm also assuming that there will be an award involved." Whitley answered, dressed in far more casual clothing which showcased his more carefree and nonchalant attitude towards his work as a psychic detective.
At least, that was he wanted people to think he was. What most people don't realize, save for Oscar and the Schnee's relatives, was that Whitley was not a psychic at all. He was actually just insanely gifted at deductive reasoning, with a hyper-observant eye and an amazingly accurate photographic memory. People think that with such gifts, the young man could have joined the police force, making detective in a few short years. However, what those people didn't know was that Whitley Schnee was a professional slacker.
Whitley now wasn't sure what to say about this counterpart of himself. A part of him thought that his on-screen counterpart was just some lazy weirdo, yet for some reason he also felt... jealous?
"He seems like somebody I could get along with." Weiss honestly said. She kind of liked this Whitley, a sentiment that Winter shared. Ruby was just amazed by Whitley's super observant eye, wishing she had it, if only to improve her weapons.
"Hey, um, Mayden," Jaune asked with a raised hand. "What the heck did the "psychic" part mean?"
"No." Mayden admits. "I don't really know much about that universe, but I do know is that people think Whitley is a psychic."
"What, like his semblance?" Ruby asked, curious about whether that was the case.
"I doubt it, since aura doesn't exist here." Mayden reveals shocking the people.
"What! No aura!" Yang cried out. Aura was the manifestation of one's soul, yet Mayden just said this world didn't have any. Didn't that make the people soulless or something? Others somewhat thinking the same. Even those like Cinder and Adam were surprised.
"Yep," Mayden continued. "Some worlds are like that. But just because one doesn't have powers, doesn't mean life ain't easy." After all, even those without aura and semblances can prove just as brutal.
Bouncing from job to job, Whitley spent the better half of a decade after high school making anonymous tips to the police after using his skills to discern cases from watching the news. It was easy money in his opinion, he'd just watch an interview of a man whose store had been robbed, observed his behaviour during said interview, and if he's nervous, fiddling with his hands, and averting eye contact with the reporter, then it was clear to Whitley that he did it. Especially if one of the man's hands had bandages upon them, most likely to hide the cuts he made breaking a glass window.
'Hmm, it seems my alternate is more intelligent than he appears.' Whitley thought in appreciation.
Of course, that was actually the tip that landed him in hot water with the San Barb Police Department. After making so many anonymous tips, using information he had seemingly pulled out of thin air, Whitley had inadvertently made himself out to be an accomplice in the very crimes he was reporting. Out of options and not wanting to spend time in a jail cell, the slacker lied and told the police that he was a psychic. That landed him his first case, which he solved with the help of his best friend and partner, Oscar Pines.
'Or... not..?' And there went that appreciation as Whitley and everyone heard this version of him, while quite intelligent, was not that bright in thinking ahead. Whitley was still surprised that Oscar was his friend. But hey, if it was because of him that he was out of jail, then he'll take it. The heir of the company stared at Oscar, wondering what he could do.
It's been five years since that case and they've made quite the names for themselves as "special consultants". After yesterday's bust, their fame will probably reach new heights, as well as an award.
Oscar was excited about the prospect of an award, saying what he thought would be the name of one given for outstanding arrests, "A Busty?"
"I was thinking lifetime achievement," Whitley opined, going on to explain, "Busties usually go to strippers or sculptors. Leo Richey has one."
Oscar hummed in thought at that, finding that statement to be a legitimate point. The two soon found themselves within a gathering mob of police officers. They have been gathered to listen to Lassie give a briefing of their newest case.
Standing next to a monitor, with Dew on the opposite side, Lassie began his briefing. "Alright, people, listen up. This morning another check-cashing establishment was robbed at gunpoint. It, like the others, is owned by Devry Longsdale."
Lassie pressed a remote in his hand, causing the monitor to project an image of the man in question. Devry Longsdale was a bald, dark-skinned man with a goatee, dressed in expensive-looking clothing. Whitley didn't know why, but he got an incredibly large flamboyant vibe from the man.
Lassie continued speaking, "Longsdale is a two-bit gangster who runs one of the sleaziest operations in town. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he's being ripped off by some other lowlife that he's double-crossed."
The officers and the two special consultants were now listening with interest. Lassie continued on, "It is important that we separate our feelings about Longsdale from the fact that whoever's robbing him is breaking the law and needs to be brought to justice."
Dew the spoke up, taking over for her partner. "And we have strong reason to believe, based on security-video footage, that this person is a Mr. David Arnold."
Whitley had to hold back a laugh as Arnold's picture was shown. The man was light-skinned, with a poorly groomed grunge mustache and a fully grown mullet, over which he wore a green trucker hat. He thought all of those went out of style a decade ago. Apparently Arnold was a little behind on the times.
"Oh, definitely," Roman thought aloud, finding that outfit horrible. In his opinion, if one wanted to commit crimes, then they'd do it while dressed to impress. Neo, while not as fashion conscious as her boss, also thought the same.
"No lie about that." Blake also thought looking nice on the job was good. Many aspiring Huntsmen dressed decently during battle, but not just because of the Grimm, but also to let people know they were fine. After all, nobody wanted to be rescued by some smelly bum dressed in rags.
"He is 35 years of age and served seven years for armed robbery." Dew finished her explanation, handing the briefing back over to Lassie.
"He disables the alarm, gets in and out in less than five minutes. He is all business." Lassie declared with seriousness.
"But only up front. Around back, there is a major party going on," Quipped Whitley, cracking wise about the robber's extremely dated hairstyle.
He and Oscar chuckle, which none of the gathered officers share in.
Suddenly a voice called out, "Mr. Schnee, Mr. Pines, my office now."
The two men turn to see the Chief of Police, Glynda Goodwitch, standing in the doorway to her office, motioning for the two to enter. Oscar immediately walked over with Whitley saying to the officers, "Excuse us. Oscar and I have to go receive props now."
"We're not going to get props, are we, Ozpin?" Oscar asked his soul-hopping ally.
"If this Glynda is anything like ours, then yes, Oscar, I can only see pain in your future." Ozpin said without sugarcoating it. The young boy gulped.
Whitley felt as though somebody just stepped over his grave.
The two friends enter her office. They are both surprised to see Henry Spencer was there as well. Henry was a retired detective who had been recently hired back to work as a consultant. He was also Whitley's uncle, as he was married to the boy's aunt, who was his father's sister. After his parents died in a plane crash, Whitley and his older sisters, Winter and Weiss, were taken in by their aunt and uncle. Obviously, Henry Spencer was a far better father figure to them than their own father, considering that Winter joined the military and Weiss became a surgeon. Whitley, on the other hand, was not as successful.
"Father and Mother died?!" Weiss was more than a little shocked, and that went double for both Winter and Whitley. They definitely didn't expect this, yet, seemingly aside from Whitley, they had... betterlives. All three suddenly felt envious for some reason.
But right now, Henry was not happy to see his nephew and Oscar. In fact, the man had a very stern and disapproving look on his face. The Schnee had seen that look more times than he cared to recall, but for some reason, he had a sinking feeling in his stomach, as did Oscar, as they stared at the man's levelled gaze.
Glynda closed the office doors and went to her office desk.
"Yesterday's stunt..." She began.
Whitley and Oscar were practically beaming at the coming praise, forgetting Henry's disappointing stare.
"May be the most asinine and idiotic thing I've seen in all my years at this department." She concluded with a borderline scathing tone.
"Ouch, talk about harsh!" Mercury remarked, chuckling a bit. Whitley and Oscar immediately glared at him, but he ignored them.
The two men's faces fell. Oscar turned to his friend, "That doesn't sound like props."
"She's roasting us." Whitley replied, completely in denial that he was being reprimanded.
"What the hell did you think you were doing?" Henry asked his nephew, completely upset by the young man's recent display of idiocy.
"Oh, I don't know, catching the bad guys." Whitley cheekily replied, causing both he and Oscar to snicker. Henry and Glynda didn't find that remark funny in the slightest.
"I hired you to assist Lassiter in taking down Baez, not go rogue." The police chief reminded them, barely containing her outrage.
Whitley then retorted, "Yeah. I told him a week ago that I sensed Baez was working out of that hotel and he didn't do anything about it."
"He was setting up a sting, Whitley." Henry told his nephew. "Do you have any idea what that involves?"
Still in a joking mood, Whitley started listing off rock bands as possible answers, "Newman, Radford, the Ladies, and the Ponies."
"This is not amusing at all." Glynda replied rubbing her head, her alternative undoubtedly feeling the same. Ironwood liked this version of Glynda, because now she was just like him.
'Sweet,' the general couldn't help happily think.
Glynda was not amused, listing off what actually went into setting up a sting operation, "Wiretaps, search warrants, surveillance teams, all of which take time!"
"That sounds like something you need to worry about. What we like to do is to come up with a solution and then make it happen." Whitley replied, explaining his work ethic.
"Not always in that order." Oscar added, backing up his bro-for-life.
Glynda was close to the end of her patience, finally telling her two usual consultants. "Well, I can't afford to hire you on any more cases when you have zerounderstanding of basic police procedure."
"In the end, we always come through." The Schnee said in his own defense.
Oscar nodded, "Just like the chairman of the kingdom's reserve."
"I'm not putting you on another case until you acquire a fundamental understanding of how police operate." Glynda warned them.
Whitley relented and said, "Fine. We'll dust off our CHiP's DVDS and meet you back here Monday morning."
Oscar grinned and quietly cheered, "Best homework ever!"
"I'm afraid that's not going to cut it." Glynda informed them with a smug smile, dashing their hopes of binge-watching one of their favorite childhood shows over the weekend. She motioned for Henry to continue in her stead.
Henry moved over to his nephew and Oscar. He placed his hands on their shoulders, as if he was worried they'll try to escape as he delivered them the news. "We've organized for the both of you to participate in a three-week crash course at the Police Academy."
And like that, whatever veneers of maturity the two men tried to project melted away as they began to shake with an uncontrolled excitement. Oscar was practically preening, acting like a child who just bought every piece of candy at a candy store. Whitley was nearly bouncing, grinning like an absolute dope as he imagined all the antics he and Oscar could get into. Forget watching one of their favorite childhood shows, they were going to actually live out one of their favorite childhood movies, the classic eighties comedy, POLICE ACADEMY.
As the two men were wrapped up in their excitement, Glynda felt the need to ruin their childish fantasy. "I have to warn you this is going to be challenging."
"Oh, come on, son." Oscar confidently said.
Don't worry. We know exactly what we need to do." Whitley said with a grin. He then listed off what was expected of them at the academy, "We make funny sound effects with our mouths and stay on Bubba Smith's good side."
He turned to Oscar, "Oz, give me some machine-gun action."
The Schnee then mimed holding a machine-gun with his hands as Oscar provided the sound effects. However, instead of a rapid succession of bullets being fired, the sound Oscar made with his lips sounded more akin to a very fast motorboat. Henry just looked on in barely-hidden exasperation. Glynda just wiped her eye as Oscar's motor boating lips had gotten some saliva in her eye.
Whitley just stared at his best friend in disbelief, "I said machine-gun action."
"I know. That was an AK-47." Oscar defended himself, completely convinced that he had sounded like one.
"Oh boy, I can only see trouble for these two." Qrow smirked, having taken a liking to the duo. They reminded him of, well, him and he liked him.
"What do you think about this Cinder?" Emerald asked her boss who just shrugged, not really into this world. Truthfully, she found it more than a little dull and barely worth a yawn. She wondered if she should just take a nap. The only ones watching were Mercury, Adam, and Roman. The others seated on the bad side were just barely paying attention.
"Hopefully something cool happens." Cardin also wanted something better. Maybe that'll happen during this academy.
"This isn't a movie, Whitley." Henry scolded before speaking, "You're gonna have to exhibit discipline, a respect for authority, a willingness to follow the rules, none of which are you strong suit."
"Noted," If it was her Whitley, Winter felt that he might have a slight chance at passing. But the one on screen, she thought it was highly unlikely.
Ignoring his uncle's words, Whitley said. "Just tell us when and where. This is a Rebecca Lobo layup."
"Okay. You have to report to the Academy downtown at noon." Glynda told them.
"Noon," Whitley mused. "That means we have four hours."
He and Oscar then exit the office. If they were going to the academy, then they had to make sure they had everything they needed for the experience. After they left, Glynda stared at them incredulously, "Four hours? No."
She looked to Henry, "It is 11:00 AM!"
"I know..." Henry sighed in defeat, used to having to deal with Whitley's lackluster sense of priorities.
Glynda then ran off to inform the two idiots that they only had an hour to prepare. Hopefully, that will be the only mistake they'll make for the next three weeks.
It was noon at the Police Academy. Walking through a hallway leading to one of the Academy's many workout facilities with two binders nestled in the nook of his arm, was Head Instructor Taiyang Xiao-Long. He had readied himself for a special assignment given to him by Chief Goodwitch. What was the nature of his assignment? It was to train two so-called consultants in basic police procedure and skills. Upon reaching the door to their meeting place, he stopped to review the information presented to him By Glynda about his newest students.
Schnee, Whitley. 29 Years of age. Only criminal charge was resisting arrest after being given a speeding ticket at age 18. Claims to be Psychic, has been hired on numerous cases for the San Barb Police Department. Has issues with authority figures, generally childish, and might suffer a textbook case of clinical narcissism. Co-Founder of a private detective agency that he has titled "PSYCH".
Pines, Oscar. 29 Years of Age. No known criminal record. Along with his partner Whitley Schnee, he has worked on numerous cases for the SBPD. Generally submissive, rarely childish, and possibly suffers from an inferiority complex. Co-founder of private detective agency "PSYCH".
"Looks like dad might have a challenge, huh, Rubes?" Yang told her sister while also glad to see her old man again. It's been too long since the whole 'song' thing.
"Yep, I hope he does alright, oh, and Whitley and Oscar, of course." Ruby said wanting all three to be fine.
After consulting his clipboard, Taiyang opened the door. He entered without sparing his new students a glance, addressing them with a stern tone. "So, Chief Goodwitch told me you two were psychics?"
"That's just me, sir." He heard Whitley say with a mockingly serious tone.
"I'm a pharmaceutical salesman, sir." Oscar clarified, using the same sort of tone as his friend, only his seriousness was somewhat more genuine.
"You don't need to finish every sentence with the word sir." Tai told them. He had been called that so many times that it has gotten tiresome.
"But it feels fun and silly, sir." Whitley joked, not dropping the tone.
"Well, knock it off." Tai ordered as he finally looked at his students. He then blinked, wondering if what he was seeing was real or not. "What the hell are you two wearing, anyway?"
Oscar answered, "These are official Police Academy sweat outfits."
Indeed, Whitley and Oscar were standing at attention, dressed in dark blue sweat suits that had a Police Academy badge stitched upon their chests. On their left sleeves, they had patches stitched on, which had their names upon them. Both men held two dark blue baseball caps in their left hands, carrying them with the same sort of respect they would hold if they were actual police hats.
Ironwood just slapped his head at the two men's idiocy. Winter was also doing the same, but only because she never thought she'd see Whitley act like this.
"I've never seen 'em before." Stated Tai truthfully, still confused by their choice in clothing.
"Then you've never seen the movies." Whitley said before explaining, "These are exact replicas."
Yes, they were in fact wearing replicas of the sweat suits worn by the actors from the movie Police Academy.
"If you give Oscar your sizes, he'll make you one as well." Whitley offered with Oscar nodding.
It hadn't even been a minute and Tai's patience was already wearing thin. He addressed the two consultants with a very stern teacher's tone, "Let me make this very clear, gentlemen. This is not summer camp. For the next three weeks, I will be putting you through an intense program designed to make you think, act, and behave like officers of the law."
Whitley and Oscar somewhat deflated at the statement, their joking moods quickly dissipating. Tai then gave a final warning, "Prepare to be pushed to your physical, mental, and, yes, emotional limits."
Ironwood liked this Tai.
Tai then approached the desk to review the lesson plan. He then heard Whitley say, "Warning- Oscar's a big weeper."
Oscar didn't sound amused in the slightest, retorting, "Say's the guy who broke down while watching a commercial this morning."
"There were abused puppies and a Sarah Lakeland song, I am not a robot." Whitley replied, trying to defend his fragile, little heart.
Then the sound of the doors opening echoed through the gym, followed by the sound fine leather shoes upon wooden tiles. The three turn to see that the SBPD'S own skeptic and grouchy detective, Lassiter, had come to see if the two were indeed at the academy. The detective had a very mocking grin on his face as he called out, "Good. Wanted to make sure you two didn't snake out of this."
Tai's face fell as he saw the Detective, whom stopped in his tracks as his grin grew wider as he recognized the instructor.
"Taiyang Xiao-Long?" Lassiter greeted the instructor as though they were old friends. Only it didn't sound friendly in the slightest, in fact, it sounded rather mocking. Lassie than asked, "I didn't know you were still on the force?"
"Hello, Lassiter." Tai greeted with a strained voice.
"Oh, looks like we got trouble." Roman mocked silently.
"If a fight breaks out, dad can beat him." Yang said, confident in her father's ability in stopping Lassiter.
Oscar looked between the two men and asked, "How do you two know each other?"
"Us," Lassie said with a smug smile, "We're old pals from the academy."
"We had an ongoing battle as to who would graduate in the top spot," Taiyang elaborated before stating proudly, "I won."
"I knew it!" Yang applauded, with Ruby joining her. Qrow just gave his ex-brother-in-law a big thumbs-up at his accomplishment.
Lassie got in Tai's face, "That's probably 'cause you cheated on that final exam."
Tai raised a finger, "I won that that spot fair and square!"
"It's good to see you two have put all this old stuff behind you." Whitley calmly and sarcastically observed.
"Eh, look, that doesn't matter now, does it," Lassie shrugged, walking past the Schnee toward the desk, "Because I'm head detective of the SBPD, and you're..."
He picked up a wooden prop gun and mockingly complimented Tai, "Clearly doing well."
"Asshole," Yang muttered, not liking Lassie already. Even Ruby frowned at the man for mocking her father. Ironwood was also losing respect for the man.
Oscar and Whitley swore they felt their instructor's blood pressure rise at that comment. The air in the gym was getting very thick with animosity.
"I'm the associate head of this academy, in charge of all cadets training," Tai explained, the anger in his voice palpable in his calm answer.
"Cool." Lassie remarked, not at all impressed. He then noticed something on Tai's chest, "Hey, look at that. They even give you your own badge."
Oscar wondered if Tai needed some ice for that burn. Whitley was wondering how the man would counterattack.
"It just turns out my heart was in teaching." The instructor said in a vain attempt to protect his self-worth.
Lassie held his hands up. "Look, there is no judgment here, if you ever want a real-life example of someone who catches bad guys for a living."
He reached over and picked up a collapsible nightstick. "I'd be more than happy to come and talk to your students."
He then jabbed the nightstick into the desk. Taiyang was not intimidated in the slightest, saying with a proud smile "Don't you forget that I worked in the field too, detective."
Lassie's face scrunched up in deep thought, "That's right. What was that, six months? Six months you did that. Then what happened?"
Tai's smile collapsed into a frown. He remembered full well what happened.
"I don't like him." Ruby said referring to Lassie and his insults toward her father. Yang glared at the detective.
"That's a good line there." Mercury was more focused on writing down the insults they threw at each other, deciding to keep them for another time. It'd be nice to use when he insulted other people.
"Suspicious Person, 4423 live at the Mobile station," Lassiter's radio blared.
"Excuse me, duty calls." Lassie spoke, before picking up his radio, "Copy, Lassiter responding, ETA 15 minutes."
"I gotta go. Really good seeing you, Xiao-Long," He walked away, not even glancing toward Oscar and Whitley as he told him. "Have fun with these clowns."
The detective left the gym, leaving a dejected Tai to stew in his self-pity. After a few seconds, Tai turned to his new students and asked, "Is he really head detective?"
"I'm afraid so." Whitley answered, regretting that he couldn't say anything to boost the poor man's confidence.
"Officer Xiao-Long, is it possible that I may take a little snack break." Oscar asked, trying to lighten the mood. Of course, he was also actually hungry and he doesn't do well on an empty stomach. "I haven't had anything since 2."
Tai looked at his watch. He then indignantly told Oscar, "It's 2:15, absolutely not."
Tai returned to his paperwork. Oscar decided now was the time to try something else. He then said aloud, "Is that a fire alarm?"
"I don't hear anything."
What followed was Oscar moving his lips, hiding them behind his baseball cap, as he tried to imitate the sound of a fire alarm going off. It sounded nothing like one, as to be expected. Tai turned back to his students and confusedly asked, "Why is he making weird cat noises?"
Whitley turned to his friend and said, "You have to stop. You've embarrassing yourself."
Oscar blushed and shrunk into himself as his counterpart made a fool of himself. The fact that many in the audience were laughing didn't help.
Whitley could understand how his alternative friend felt. Hopefully he wouldn't be as big of a fool.
"Listen, your program breaks down as follows." Tai began as he picked up his binders, "third will involve field work and one-third will be focused on physical training."
The Schnee thought it wise to joke, "What about the other third?"
"Are you kidding?" Oscar incredulously asked, not wanting more work than he already had to do.
Tai gave them both a befuddled look, to which Whitley replied, "Never mind. Surprise us."
At that, Taiyang Xiao-Long smiled. He can most certainly do that.
The screen immediately changed over to the Academy's outdoor training field, where many cadets had begun their warm-up exercise. They were getting themselves ready for the obstacle course. What followed was a shot of several cadets, humans and Faunus, jogging across a wooden beam, one of the hardest obstacles to overcome for newcomers. Following that was an elevated platform that had a single rope suspended over a muddy hole of water. The purpose of this exercise was to swing across, without falling into the dirty water. The last exercise was a wall-scaling challenge, in which the cadets had to climb over a wooden wall to the other side.
Every cadet that had taken the course thus far were in the prime of their youth, bodies nearly at the pinnacle of peak human and faunus conditioning, effortlessly accomplishing each exercise with a practiced poise and precision befitting future officers of the law.
And then there was Whitley and Oscar, who are nearing the end of the prime of their youth, with bodies that were average in physique and conditioning, struggling with each exercise with all the uncoordinated clumsiness and awkwardness of two physically-challenged fifty-somethings.
Oscar and Whitley weren't sure what to say about that particular notion. Though considering how Roman, Ruby, Nora-who was laughing out loud-Cardin, and even Winter were chuckling, they had a feeling this wouldn't end well for them. Not one bit.
The screen showed Taiyang near the wall, eagerly awaiting the arrival of his new students. He looked up in anticipation, only to find that they had not reached the top. He gave them a few more seconds, but they still had not climbed over. Just as he was going to check the other side, he was surprised to see Whitley and Oscar running past both sides of the wooden obstacle, out of breath and having given up on the task. The man just watched the two in disappointment.
"This should be fun." Cardin grinned as even Cinder decided to see what might happen. Who knows, maybe one of the two fools will break a leg, in a literal sense. Adam was hoping for such a thing.
The screen switched over to another area, the simulation village, where cadets train for shootouts and Swat maneuvers. Whitley and Tai, wearing protective eyewear and noise-canceling earmuffs, approached one of the mocked up buildings. Suddenly, a wooden cutout of a masked gunman slid into view, gun drawn and aimed. Whitley immediately aimed his own firearm and fired, placing a bullet right into the mock-crooks hands. Tai, honestly impressed, nodded in approval.
Winter and Weiss nodded in approval as well, proud that their little brother, in this universe, actually knew how to defend himself.
It cut back to the obstacle course. Whitley and Tai stood on the Rope-swinging platform, waiting for Oscar to swing over to other side. Unfortunately, Oscar had not used enough momentum in his swing, for he was now suspended over the muddy water, hands gripped firmly around the rope like a lifeline.
"Dude, you're supposed to let go." Whitley told his friend, hoping that he'll oblige.
Oscar was having none of it, "And fall into that disgusting-ass water? I'll get dysentery, Whit!"
Taiyang just palmed his face, wondering how was it these two were taken seriously by the department.
"By doing actual successful work in the crimes they solve." Mayden responded. Plot armor, it was a beautiful thing.
It cut back to the Simulation House, only this time Whitley was inside it. As he scoped his surroundings, he heard the sound of another cutout being pulled out. Turning on his heel, he instinctively pulled the trigger, firing a single shot. Fortunately, the bullet hit the target dead center in the chest. Unfortunately, it was just a woman carrying groceries.
Seeing that he made a mistake, Whitley did the only sensible thing in his position.
He shot a bullet through the grocery bags. It was the only way to be sure there was no bomb. Nodding at his work, Whitley moved on.
Winter was starting to feel doubt in her alternative brother's skills, but said nothing. Ironwood knew why.
'Strange how he hit the exact same spot as Winter did back in training.' Even Winter had to learn a thing or two back then.
The screen Cut back to the Rope-Swinging Platform. Oscar was still on the rope, refusing to let go. However, Whitley had run out of patience and decided to swing across, regardless if his friend was still hanging on to the rope.
Now they were both stuck suspended over the dirty-ass water Oscar was so afraid of.
"How does this improve the situation?" Oscar angrily asked, wondering how Whitley thought this was a good idea.
Completely missing the point, as well as the question, Whitley asked his friend, "What is dysentery?"
Oscar could only glare at his friend for his ignorance. Taiyang said nothing. He was too busy banging his head against his clipboard.
"Pretty sure your old man did that with Summer and Raven." Qrow told his nieces, who looked at him in surprise.
"Really," Ruby asked with interest.
"What happened that made him do that?" Yang also wanted to know.
"Let's see," Qrow said smiling while also remembering the good old days. "Summer was unable to land properly when she jumped off a tree and kept landing on her face, and Raven, well, she accidentally broke more than a few swords in battle."
He remembered all the money Raven lost and then stole to compensate for the loss.
The Screen returned to the house, where Whitley was still undertaking his target practice, with Taiyang following closely from behind. After everything he'd seen today, he was not going to leave this idiot unsupervised. As they turned a corner, Whitley saw what he thought was another cardboard cutout. He stopped and aimed his gun.
Only it wasn't a cardboard thug or civilian. It was Oscar, who had foolishly walked into the middle of a live fire exercise, chowing down on a sandwich. Oscar saw his friend and froze.
"Don't shoot!" Oscar cried out not wanting to end up dead because of a mistake. Whitley also felt the same, but only because he didn't want to end up in jail. The cells he saw when he went on that trip to one of Atlas' prisons were unsanitary.
For Taiyang, that was the straw that broke the camel's back. He shouted out, "TIME!" bringing the exercise to an end. Having heard the man's shout, Whitley removed his earmuffs. He then noticed that Oscar actually had two sandwiches. He walked over to his friend, wondering if he'd let him have the other one.
Taiyang shook his head at the two, wondering how it was that these two idiots haven't killed themselves yet, doing what they do.
"By incredible luck and the fact they were born as the stars of the show." Mayden opined, even though the audience didn't understand what he meant by 'stars'.
They returned to the gym, where Taiyang "I can't believe you are Henry Spencer's nephew!"
He honestly can't understand it. How can the relative of one of the SBPD's most decorated and legendary officers, a man whom he considered a legend and role model, be this horrifically inept at police work?
Said relative replied, "Well, neither can I, It's an ongoing investigation."
He then raised a finger in the air, saying, "And in my defense, I had reasonable suspicion for all of those cardboard people that I shot."
"You shot two innocent women," Tai said, still completely in disbelief at that fact.
Winter looked away, averting her gaze from Ironwood, who just smirked. Who knew Whitley and his oldest sister had that much on common?
"If I may, the first woman with the groceries was exiting a library that doesn't allow snacks." Whitley began before explaining his reasoning, "I know this because we've tried on several occasions."
Oscar nodded in agreement. They had indeed tried that, only to be thrown out.
"The second woman was simply a replica of the first woman, but they painted whiskers on her face, which is both offensive to Faunus and suspicious." Whitley finished, explaining his rationale behind the second woman.
Adam had no words, he honestly couldn't tell if that was racist or not. The same went for Blake.
"But you shot her three times." Oscar commented.
Winter now looked away from Whitley in embarrassment. Her action only confused him.
Whitley shrugged and replied, "Semantics."
Oscar immediately argued, "It's not semantics."
Taiyang ignored their little debate and asked, "How can you two be responsible for solving all these cases" he then wondered aloud, "I can't believe you get out of bed in the morning without hurting yourselves."
Whitley chose that moment to joke, "Oh, but we do and injury free since June of last year; when Oscar broke his finger flipping the injury-countdown calendar"
Oscar just stared indignantly at the remark, wondering why he had to be the butt of the joke. Whitley then asked his friend, "Wait, that's irony, right?"
"Irony is you asking me what irony means every time you say it." Oscar shortly said, still confounded by his best friend's poor grasp on the concept of irony.
Tai shook his head, wanting to forget this idiot exchange. He then suggested, "All right, maybe you'll do better in the field."
Forgetting their previous argument, the two cadets perked up. They followed Tai to the desk. As soon as he was on the opposite side, he explained, "Today, we will be patrolling a designated area under my close supervision, as well as Fenway."
"Who's Fenway?" Oscar asked. He wondered another instructor going to join them.
"That guy right over there" Tai smiled as he turned and pointed, directing both men's attention to an open doorway. Lying down on a welcome mat, fight in the doorway, tongue slobbering and panting, was an old basset hound. Whitley and Oscar immediately cooed at the sight of the old dog.
"Is that a version of Zwei!?" Ruby excitedly asked, with Weiss and Yang wondering the same. Blake just hissed at the sight of the dog. In her rightly justified opinion, dogs shouldn't be allowed on the force. Who knew what diabolical plots they had in their little minds?
"No, he's just a dog that was in the K-9 unit." Mayden answered honestly.
The three girls sighed in disappointment, but Blake kept her eye on that dog nonetheless. Adam just rolled his eyes, recalling his old partner's ridiculous fear of dogs. He remembered this one time when she ruined an operation because she heard what she thought was a dog barking.
It was from a dog, alright. But it was a child's toy dog!
Taiyang then stated with pride, "Best scent dog in the whole kingdom, played a role in solving over 50 cases."
Whitley then jokingly remarked, "Also played roles in the Bad News Bears, The Odd Couple, and Grumpy Old Men."
Oscar laughed at the joke. He then joined in the fun, saying "He does look like Walter Machtau."
As though understanding the joke, Fenway barked. Tai then pulled up a box from beneath the desk, which he then placed on top of it. Whitley and Oscar immediately helped themselves to its contents as Tai explained. "Here are your uniforms. The badges are temporary. The guns, thank the gods, are props, but everything else is what's issued to our current officers."
He then noticed Oscar messing around with a nightstick and Whitley fiddling with a radio. "These are not toys, Gentlemen!"
He then told them sternly, "An officer's equipment is to be guarded and accounted for at all times, is that clear?"
Whitley turned on his radio and spoke into it, "Yes, Sensei."
"So on patrol today, can we pull people over and stuff?" Oscar asked.
Although dreading to answer, Tai answered nonetheless. "Yes, as long as there's probable cause."
Oscar smiled and nudged Whitley, looking at him with an excited gleam in his eyes. The Schnee didn't know what his friend was planning, but he was sure that he was going to like it.
"This isn't going to end well." Jaune answered already feeling something messy was about to happen. Nora just chewed on her popcorn with glee, ready to watch the coming comedic hijinks.
The sound of wailing sirens blared as the screen switched over, this time to a blue car that had parked onto the side of a street. The driver of this vehicle was none other than Detective Carlton Lassiter, who can't believe that he, of all people, had been pulled over by the police.
"I'm actually okay with this." Ruby agreed with her sister.
The detective fumed in silence as he waited for an officer to approach, window already rolled down. He then saw the torso of a uniformed officer enter his field of vision, standing right next to his open window. The torso then leaned, revealing the face of the person who had pulled him over. Lassie immediately scowled upon recognizing the face.
Wearing sunglasses, with a toothpick in his mouth, was none other than Whitley Schnee, dressed in full cadet officer's uniform, looking at him with a mockingly serious face. The so-called psychic then calmly asked, "Sir, I'm gonna need to see your license and registration, please."
"Heh..." Whitley lightly chuckled, not minding what his counterpart was doing this time. Oscar pretty much felt the same. Lassie deserved it, in their opinion.
"This is the power of karma at work." Qrow said with a smirk, glad that the arrogant officer was being knocked down a peg or two.
"Go get him, Oscar and Whitley!" Ruby cheered out loud.
"That man is going to have a headache." Ironwood stated, knowing that Qrow sometimes did this.
Lassie immediately retorted, "Schnee, you must be out of your damn mind if you think that is gonna happen."
"License and registration, please, sir." Whitley insisted as he straightened himself.
Before he could protest further, Lassie heard a loud tap on the passenger door. He looked over to see an irritated Oscar Pines tapping a nightstick against the car door. The other annoyance in his life then accusingly asked, "Have you been drinking, sir?"
Having crossed the threshold of his anger, Lassie unbuckled his seatbelt and yelled in rage, "THAT'S IT!"
As the detective exited the driver's seat, Whitley calmly warned him. "Sir, if you don't calm down, I will be forced to tase you in the face."
"Do it! Do it!" Qrow cried out with Mercury and even Roman cheering for that to happen. Pain will hopefully be brought.
"You don't have a taser!" Lassie argued as he left the vehicle, standing next to Whitley, who maintained his calm composure as a fake-cop. Then he saw the person standing behind the Schnee. It suddenly all made sense to the detective.
"Ohh," He began, "I should have known."
Officer Xiao-long addressed his former rival, "You were going 45 in a 40." He then smiled, "The law is the law."
"Oh snap! How'd you like that, copper?!" Tock joyfully said already liking this direction. Seeing an officer getting busted by another officer, and for a speeding violation? That was priceless. She could already tell this was going to be a riot.
Lassie scowled, "What the hell, Xiao-Long? You can't beat me on the field, so now you're trying to beat me off?"
Whitley couldn't help himself as he said with a straight face, "You may want to rephrase that, sir."
Some in the audience laughed at that, with Cardin, Qrow, Mercury, Nora, and Roman being the loudest. Whitley was trying his hardest to keep his own laughter down, but the face he made as he tried to do so just caused the laughter to increase in ferocity.
As she laughed, Yang nudged her sister and asked, "Double Entedres, you've gotta love them, am I right?"
Ruby blinked in confusion and innocently asked, "Double what-now?"
Winter and Weiss simply wondered where their brother had learned such distasteful humor.
Oscar threw in his two cents, "Maybe he has been drinking."
"Sir, I'm gonna need you to stand on one foot and hop at a medium pace." Whitley ordered the detective, wanting to test his friend's theory.
Before he could rebuke that statement, the radio in Lassiter's car suddenly blared. "Attention all units, we have a robbery in progress at Longsdale's check cashing, Wilcox and Shire."
"You three clowns stay here; I'm gonna go do some real police work." With that said, Lassie returned to his vehicle, but not before sending Taiyang a hateful glare, telling the instructor, "You're pathetic, Xiao-Long."
The three stood silent as the detective drove off, sirens blaring and speeding faster before. Oscar walked over to Tai and said to him, "Damn. Don't let him get to you, Tai."
Tai, however, wasn't reassured by his new student's words of encouragement, "No, he's right. I am pathetic. What the hell am I doing?"
"Oh, dad..." Ruby cried, wanting nothing more than to give her alternate father a hug. Yang felt the same.
Those on the 'Bad Side' no longer cared as the fun had been ruined.
Taking the toothpick out of his mouth, Whitley told the man with a genuinely sincere tone, "I'll tell you exactly what you're doing. You're teaching refined skills that guys like us can utilize for weeks, most likely days."
Oscar nodded at his friend's words as Tai regained a little bit of his confidence. Whitley continued, "Seriously, for the ten hours or so that we retain the stuff you've taught us, you made a real difference, Tai."
His confidence and ego recovered, Tai then confidently declared. "I am TWICE the cop that he is."
"Hell yeah you are, dad!" Yang screamed with her arms up, glad her father had regained his confidence. "Show that prick who's the boss!"
"Well, don't just stand there and wax on about it. Did you know that he took the freeway?" Tai turned to Whitley in surprise as the younger man said that. The blond officer shrugged, "So?"
"So? He just added ten minutes to his trip and we can get you there in less than five." Oscar explained, wanting to help the man show up Lassiter.
Whitley smiled knowingly, "Just in time to bust the perp."
Despite his newfound confidence, Taiyang immediately dismissed the idea, saying, "No. No. No way. You know what kind of trouble I'd get into, getting two cadets involved in an active robbery? No."
"Think about it, Tai. This is finally a chance to show him up once and for all."
Tai stared at the two men as he thought about it. As he considered the proposition, his mind wandered to the past twenty years of his life. The ridicule he endured from his fellow classmates as they went on to enjoy fulfilling careers in the department, whereas he was stuck teaching rookies at the academy like a washout. He recalled the countless nights he spent coming home to his wife and two young daughters, wishing he could excite them with stories of his life as a highly respected officer of the law, rather than the regular recount of failing student after student. His mind made up, Taiyang told the two, "If we do this, we got to catch the bad guys."
Whitley's grin grew wider, "Don't worry, Tai. It's our specialty."
The Screen shifted to show the three in the cruiser, with Tai behind the steering wheel and the two consultants seated in the back. Just as they said, Whitley and Oscar's shortcut helped them get to the area in less than five minutes. The car pulled up to a street corner, where Whitley told his instructor, "Slow down. It's just up here on the left."
Tai heeded his directions, slowing his car and making a clean left turn onto another street. But just as they got on the street, a man came bolting from their left, cutting across the street to the other side. The man had a backpack, a mullet, a terribly grown mustache, and a trucker hat.
"Disaster is on the road." Roman grinned, wondering how these clowns are going to solve this case. He may not like cops, or detectives, but he would be lying if he said that he didn't find these two amusing. Plus, he hoped that a gun fight will be shown.
Whitley instantly recognized the man and exclaimed, "Holy crap! That's the guy!"
Oscar followed with a rushed, "Stop! Stop right here!"
Taiyang pressed his foot on the brake, bringing the car to an abrupt halt. Whitley and Oscar immediately exited the vehicle, intent on chasing the thief. Whitley shouted to their driver, "Let's go, Tai!"
But Whitley stopped in his tracks once he noticed the older man had not taken his hands off of the steering wheel. The instructor hadn't even taken his seatbelt off. He sat in his seat, hands firmly locked upon the wheel, eyes staring right at the suspect in fear. He was even trying to steady his breathing. Taiyang Xiao-Long was not going to move. He had frozen in the heat of the moment.
"Tai," Oscar pleaded with the man, hoping to snap the man back into action.
Whitley then told his friend, "I understand why he went back to teaching."
"Probably because of his stage fright or whatever," Qrow mused, realizing this Tai was a lot like his own. They both had slight problems when in action, and thus preferred to have a simple life in teaching.
"Dang it," Yang muttered, with Ruby feeling the same.
"Hopefully dad will snap out of it." Ruby hoped.
With that said, the two cadets continued their pursuit, leaving their teacher in his car. But as they ran off, neither noticed Tai frown as he wallowed in self-pity, hating himself for his cowardice and letting two cadets out of his supervision.
The two were now chasing David Arnold through a park. To their horror, Arnold was much faster and fitter than he looked, as he ran with the speed of a track star, whereas they ran with the speed of two out-of-shape adults. Then Arnold surprised them further by effortlessly climbing a fence, which was what the two had tried and failed to do back at the academy. The two police cadets stopped at the fence, out of breath and regretting skipping out on exercise.
Oscar then noticed something about Arnold's path, "He'd headed towards the college over there."
Whitley nodded, only to wince as he took a breath. He then said, "I guess that obstacle course does have a practical purpose."
"You don't say?" Whitley sarcastically asked. This was too humiliating for him.
It took them several minutes, but, at last, Whitley and Oscar had finally reached the San Barb Institute of Technology. After questioning various students if they had seen Arnold enter the campus, the two were now inside a Coed dorm that Arnold was seen entering. The two friends entered the dormitory, searching each succeeding floor for their suspect. They had finally reached the final floor.
"Everybody, listen up!" Whitley shouted, "Come out of your dorm rooms!"
Oscar completed the image by banging his fist against every door they strode by. However, at one door, a female student walked out wrapped in a towel. Despite being out of breath, Oscar was able to smile and say with a flirty tone, "hello."
"We are looking for a redneck..." Whitley announced before taking a deep breath. He then continued, "With a black backpack and we're pretty sure he came down this hallway!"
"Screw you, cadet!" One arrogant student shouted, laughing at the two uniformed dorks.
"Such disrespect..." Glynda angrily said not liking how the boys were being treated despite the fact they were trying to help.
"I understand that." Winter coldly said also knowing such a thing as once upon a time she faced such scorn. It took years before anybody actually bothered respecting her and even now it persists simply because she used to be an heiress.
Ironwood angrily stared at the boy, reminding him of an old rival who acted all that. Glad he was gone and done with.
"Yeah, that tends to happen from time to time," Qrow acknowledged, knowing that people weren't always helpful to those trying to help them.
'Yes, shame not all people can accept help." Ozpin too had his fair share of those not taking him seriously. But maybe these boys will find better luck elsewhere.
They then saw one frightened student pointing to a room with an open door. The two cadets enter the dorm room, hoping to find Arnold and apprehend him. Instead, they found a blonde-haired male student, sitting on a chair and using a laptop. The student pointed to his room's window and told the two with a frightful tone, "Uh, He-He went out there!"
Like that. How convenient.
They ran to the opened window and looked through it. All they saw was a small city park filled with a few walking students, but no sign of David Arnold. They then heard Tai call over the radio, "Pines, any luck?"
Oscar quickly replied back, "That's a negative."
The two friends stood in the dorm room, wondering how they could've lost Arnold. That's when they noticed the sheets on one of room's beds began to move. They watched as a young man pushed the sheets back. Whitley saw that he had flowing deep brown brown hair that reached to his neck, equally brown eyes, and that he had some poorly-shaven stubble on his upper lip. It appeared the kid had ripped his mustache off rather than shaved it.
"Wow, that's just sad." Roman said with Neo nodding with a sign with the word 'Pathetic' on it.
The student then squinted at the men and dazedly asked, "What are you guys, like, firemen?"
Whitley then took Oscar's radio and called Tai, "Don't sweat it, Tai, and Lassie doesn't need to hear about this."
"Too late, idiots," Lassie answered over the radio. He didn't sound happy in the slightest.
Whitley and Oscar looked at each other in fear. This was just not their day.
"You can say that again." Ironwood recalled the days when he tried solving a case, only to come up empty. Roman on the other hand smiled recalling how he put many officers in that position. Oh, how he missed those good old days.
Later, back at the Station, Whitley and Tai stood in the chief's office. Oscar had not joined them yet, having left to get a sandwich from a department vending machine to eat. He had to calm himself after all that excitement. By the Schnee's estimates, it'll take his friend about 35 to 45 before he left the bathroom after eating it. Glynda stared angrily at the two men and Lassiter sat on a nearby chair, ready to watch what was sure to be what one of the most enjoyable things he ever saw.
Glynda looked disappointedly at Taiyang, "Officer Xiao-Long, you drove two cadets to a robbery in progress, and you let them chase a suspect while you did what exactly?"
"I'm not sure it's important, chief," Tai said, trying to deflect attention from him.
Lassie would have none of it, as he stood up and smugly spoke, "I have an educated guess that's 100% accurate. Officer Xiao-Long here froze like the North Pole, because when some men look danger in the eye, they blink repeatedly, like they're staring into the sun."
Tai's confidence shrunk under the man's words. Whitley just rolled his eyes at the detective's petty display. Lassie than smiled smugly at Tai and facetiously asked, "Some things never change, huh?"
Yang and Ruby now really wanted to punch that jerk in the face. Ruby was even tempted to say a few bad words. That big jerk!
Glynda ignored her head detective and told the instructor, "Well, unfortunately, I have no choice but to suspend you for one month, pending a full investigation."
If Tai didn't look beaten before, he certainly did now, as his face began to imitate a sad, little puppy. Whitley came to the man's defense and tried to reason with the Chief, "No. Come on, Chief, don't you think that's a little harsh?"
Glynda then pointed her gaze at Whitley, harshly reminding the young man, "Mr. Schnee, You're in no position to be defending anyone. You were told not to participate in any investigations until you completed your training, and then you ignored me while somehow managing to lose half your equipment in the process."
"What?" Whitley balked at the accusation. "I lost my hat and my flashlight."
It wasn't like he lost anything important. A flashlight and a hat weren't that expensive to replace, so why was he suddenly getting all the heat. Then Lassie walked over to him and asked, "Where's your radio?"
Wanting to show he was not that irresponsible, Whitley reached down to his equipment belt, wanting to pull out the radio just to prove the detective wrong. All he pulled up was the connector. Tai sighed at his now-former student's actions, Glynda stared at the wire incredulously, and Lassie smiled like a kid in a candy store.
Whitley looked at the disconnected wire, "And my radio... I lost that."
Whitley slapped his forehead. He honestly can't believe his alternate universe counterpart was this clueless. His sister's laughter did not help.
Trying to save face, he then told Goodwitch, "Look a guy can only carry so much stuff, Chief."
Having had enough of this idiocy, Glynda told the man with a forceful tone, "You and Mr. Pines are to return to the academy immediately."
"We'd love to do that, Chief, but you just suspended our instructor." Whitley reminded her, adding, "And I'm not entirely sure Oscar is gonna make it out of the latrine."
Glynda smiled, "Well, you now have a substitute, one that I have handpicked to ensure that there will be no more incidents."
The Screen shifted back to the Academy, this time to a busy classroom, as a lecture was being given by their substitute instructor, Dew Gayle. With a slideshow playing behind her, Dew explained to her students what was being shown on the slide. As she explained the P.I.T maneuver, Whitley and Oscar sat in the back as they listened. Well, Oscar was listening; Whitley was too busy thinking about how this scenario reminded him of a certain movie.
"Dude, this is so Top Guns," The Schnee told Oscar, who hummed at that.
"I'm Cruiser, she's MacGills," Whitley then said to him, "and you're Snowman."
Oscar's face fell at that. "Why can't I be the Rooster?"
"You know why." Whitley replied.
"Stop hypothetically typecasting me, Whitley." Oscar demanded. Sure, Goose died in the movie, but that wasn't going to happen to him.
"Come on, It also means you were in Tomb-rock and got to be Batguy." Whitley reminded his friend.
"Actually, that'd be pretty awesome, to be honest." Oscar said, liking the implications of that sentence.
Oscar continued to push the issue, "I want to be the Tan Rooster."
"I can't do this with you right now." Whitley said, ending the argument, as he raised his hand. Whitley was going to enjoy every moment of this.
The screen ended just like that, With Tai beaten, the boys back in class, and Whitley's own girlfriend actually teaching said class. Though ignoring all of that, one person in the audience had a question.
"What exactly is this film Top Guns? Wait, no, dunno why, but it feels more like Top Gun." Tock asked with Mayden shrugging with his non-existent shoulders.
"No idea. I've been told it's a movie about planes. Hey, I don't know every film that exists in the multiverse, okay." Mayden replied, speaking truthfully.
"Aw man, so this is how it ends, lame!" Yang shouted, wanting to see her dad put that Lassie jerk in his place.
"It did seem incomplete." Ren said to the Keeper.
"Likewise," Glynda said in agreement.
"Then don't worry, because soon you'll get to see part two." Mayden said, reminding them that this viewing was a two-parter. This made some in the audience happy, for they wanted to see how Oscar and Whitley will solve the case.
"Then what are you waiting for? Play it!" Nora commanded excitedly, wanting to see what was next. Many shared that sentiment.
"It would be nice to see the rest." Blake agreed. She can admit to liking this universe somewhat.
Jaune then cheered, "Oh, yeah, on with the show!"
Even the Schnee sisters joined in. Oscar and Whitley also wanted to see what became of their alternates. Hopefully, they didn't get hurt or worse.
"Okay then," Mayden agrees also wanting to see the rest. "In that case, part two starts now."
With that the screen lights up to resume the show, ready to present the second half of this viewing. It was no clip like the other worlds, but a feature length showing. It was almost like watching a full episode on television.
This should be fun.
And that ends that. Part 2 will be coming up eventually with the cast seeing the rest of the adventure of our detectives. Either something good will happen, or something funny, maybe both. Only one way to find out. Until next time.
P.S.-Does anybody know how to make a TV Trope page? Been trying to make one for this fanfiction but couldn't figure out how.