WARNING: some sexual harassment in this chapter!
Sorry for the long wait! I warned you this chapter was going to be long! Plus, I was busy working on my original novel and am proud to say I've finished the first draft!
Insert animated ballroom dancing scene here.
The ball was to begin in less than an hour, and Black Hat was inspecting the ballroom to ensure that those idiot minions of his hadn't botched things up. The beige marble floor was glistening, free of any scratches or smudges. All the cobwebs that had inhabited the ceiling were gone, and the crystal chandelier had been polished perfectly.
It was clear that Lita had taken the Día de los Muertos theme seriously when creating the decorations. Garlands of marigolds and painted skulls hung from the walls and were wrapped around the pillars. Black Hat was a little disappointed that the skulls were plastic, but found the choice tasteful, nonetheless.
The bear had followed Black Hat's instructions in preparing a buffet table consisting solely of finger foods. Which had been a good call, as Dementia's idea of silverware was meat cleavers and pitchforks. Sighing, Black Hat snapped his fingers to teleport the weapons away. As much as he would love to watch other villains go at each other with sharp objects, tonight was to be a sophisticated event. He would save the bloody brawls for the company picnic.
"S-So," Flug said, coming up behind his boss, "d-do you like it, s-sir?"
Black Hat turned to the scientist, who was dressed in a black tuxedo. His paper bag and goggles remained the same, though he'd switched his usual yellow rubber gloves for white satin ones. Black Hat himself had ditched his trench coat for a tailcoat, and his red undershirt for a white one.
"You morons get to live another day," Black Hat said, glancing Flug over. "But can't you tie a bowtie properly?"
Flug squeaked as Black Hat undid his bowtie in order to retie it.
"Honestly," the demon said, brushing lint off Flug's shoulders. "You are all really hopeless sometimes." Stepping back, Black Hat went to readjust his own bowtie. "Where are the others?"
"S-Still getting ready, sir," the scientist replied, subconsciously smoothing out the wrinkles in his undershirt.
"The guests will be here any minute! What could be taking them so long?"
"W-Well, s-sir, L-Lita asked for help in getting ready, b-because she doesn't know much about—"
"Let me get this straight," Black Hat said, putting his hands together. "You have Dementia helping Lita get ready for a ball?"
"A-And 5.0.5., s-sir!" Flug pointed out with a shaking finger.
The demon narrowed his eye. "If both those women come down looking like wild animals, I'll make you look much worse, Doctor!"
The scientist gulped. "Y-Yes, sir."
Just then, 5.0.5. appeared at the top of the ballroom steps. All he really needed to get ready was a black bowtie beneath his neck and a top hat covering his flower. Well, at least the bear has some class, Black Hat thought.
5.05. was squealing as he raced down the stairs, his paws on his cheeks as he grinned.
"What's gotten you so cheerful?" Black Hat demanded. "Never mind, idiotic question."
"Boo-fuh!" 5.0.5. exclaimed.
"'Beautiful?'" Flug translated. "Are you talking about Lita?"
The bear nodded excitedly.
Meanwhile, Lita and Dementia were behind the corner of the entrance at the top of the steps. The latter had the former by the hands, urging her to come.
"I don't know about this, Dem," Lita said.
"Come on, don't be shy!" Dementia exclaimed.
"I look ridiculous!"
"I made you look hot! Don't let all my hard work go to waste!" She leaned in to whisper. "Just let me go out first, so Blackie doesn't get distracted by you!"
Lita rolled her eyes. "Like I said. He's all yours."
Squealing giddily, Dementia stepped out in her red satin gown. She had styled her green hair into a single long braid, sticking out of the top of her head. She still wore fingerless gloves, only they were a matching black this time. She watched Black Hat expectantly as she descended the stairs, but he only grunted in disinterest.
"Thank evil you managed to bathe her this time," he said to Flug. "Now where is Miss Ladrona?"
"She's coming," Dementia said, cozying up the demon. "So, what do you think of my new dress, honey?"
He scowled at her. "I swear, if you made her look ridicu—"
He stopped suddenly, his eye widening as it caught the figure descending the staircase. Not taking his gaze away, Black Hat pushed Dementia out of his space.
Black Hat had never seen Lita in a gown before. It was no surprise that she had chosen black, as she wore that color often. But he did not expect her to look so elegant in that long, tulle-layered gown. The bodice emphasized her tiny frame, the off-the-shoulder style exposing her finely-toned shoulders. Her arms were accessorized with black silk gloves reaching up to her elbows, fingerless to show off her black nail polish.
What was even more striking about her was her hair. Its usual blackness was streaked with blue, bright enough to be noticeable, but dark enough not to be considered outlandish. Her ponytail was a little higher than normal, held up by a spiked hairclip, the highlighted locks dangling in curls down her neck. This brought attention to the black choker with a spider pendant.
Her makeup, courtesy of 5.0.5., had brought new life to Lita's face. Her features had been smoothed out with honey-colored foundation, with her cheeks faintly blushed in contrast to the black lipstick. Her eyes were lined with black, shadowed with the same shade as her highlights, bringing out the brightness of her blue eyes.
The sight struck Black Hat speechless. He had to hand it to Dementia. Her stylizing choices had given Lita a sort of sophisticated, dark look. Like a goth version of Cinderella.
To think that this elegant beauty before him was the same skinny little brat who had kicked him in the shin all those years ago.
"Wow," Flug uttered in amazement.
5.0.5. elbowed the scientist, as if to say, "What did I tell you?"
"I did her hair and nails!" Dementia exclaimed, raising her hand. "And lent her some of my accessories! Did I do a good job, hon? Did I, did I, did I?!"
Black Hat ignored her. He was too focused on Lita as she reached the bottom of the steps. She was too self-conscious at the moment to look anyone in the eye.
"I knew it," she said, turning to go back up. "I look silly!"
Before she could take a step, her hand was snatched. Lita looked down to see the black gloved hand belonging to her boss. As she met his gaze, his one tiny pupil seemed larger than normal. He looked like he wanted to say something, but he didn't. Lita stood still as he slowly raised her hand towards his face. Towards his lips.
"What are you doing?" Dementia said in confusion.
Snapping out of his daze, Black Hat released Lita's hand.
"You look," he said, clearing his throat, "suitable enough. And even if you didn't, we simply haven't the time! Flug, make sure the Hatbots are in service mode, and start the DJ Bot! 5.0.5., monitor the buffet table and do not try and look cute!"
"Broo?" 5.0.5. said, translating to, "How in the world am I supposed to do that?"
"Dementia, try not to kill any of the guests!"
"Sure thing, love!" Dementia said with a salute. "I'll try not to kiss any of 'em, either!"
Ignoring that last part, Black Hat turned to Lita, pausing a moment as he took in her appearance for a second time. His chest tightened as her brilliant eyes locked onto his. Biting down on his tongue was all he could do to stop himself from saying what he was really thinking.
A cough from Flug brought the demon back to the present. "Lita, yes. You will be up front with me, greeting the guests."
He held out his arm and Lita blushed as she slid her hand through. Dementia scowled, watching the two of the ascend the steps.
Black Hat couldn't understand what had come over him. He'd seen many women in elegant gowns before, their hair done up and their faces caked in makeup. So, why did seeing Lita like this have an effect on him? He glanced at her every few seconds, as if to verify that this was indeed his employee. But none of that made the unfamiliar stirring in his stomach go away.
Meanwhile, Lita was trying not to look so flustered, but failing miserably. She'd only ever seen Black Hat in his trench coat. She hadn't been prepared to see him in a tux. It made him look more distinguished than usual, which she hadn't thought possible. And there was something about men in formal attire that just…did it for her.
She shook her head, reminding herself that this was her boss, and that if she got this worked up over every man in a tux, she was going to be a mess tonight. After all, this was a ball.
Once they reached the top of the steps, Black Hat shrugged out of Lita's hold, placing both hands behind his back. A Security Bot was manning the front door, using facial recognition to verify that all the guests coming had been indeed invited. Heroes would certainly take advantage of the outdoor security system being turned off for the night.
Out of the corner of his eye, Black Hat could see Lita fiddling with her partially gloved hands. "What's the matter? Scared to meet a crowd of villains all at once?"
"More like…nervous." She bit her lip. "What if…what if they make fun of me?"
He tilted his head. "Now, why would they make fun of you?"
"W-Well, you've said so yourself I'm…not a real villain. After all, Megamind and Hawk Moth didn't take me seriously when they first saw me." She clenched her hands together. "What if…they think I'm weak because I haven't killed anybody? O-Or think I'm a joke, because I look too 'cutesy' or something? What if they make fun of me like…like everyone else and…?"
She trailed off when she felt his finger on her chin and he turned it so that she could see his grin.
"Just be your usual charming self, my dear," Black Hat said sincerely, lowering his hand. "And if they do make fun of you, you have my permission to show them just how villainous you can be." As the doorbell rang throughout the house, he turned his back to the ballroom. "Just don't stab them. That would be rude."
Holding back her smile, Lita faced outward. "No problem. You issued a no-weapons policy for this event, remember?"
The first to arrive was a pale woman who reminded Lita of the legendary la Llorona. Her hair was a cloud of black smoke, and her white ballgown covered her completely from neck to toe, fitting her lean figure.
"Miss Penumbra," Black Hat said, holding out his hand. "You are early."
"I was trying to get out of the sun," Penumbra said, shaking his hand. "It hasn't quite set yet. Hope I'm not being a bother."
"Not at all." Retracting his hand, he looked her over. "I take it that Sunblast wasn't much help in finding a cure for your condition?"
"Oh, no," she said with a sigh. "He must've escaped somehow. Clever boy! He put a lightbulb in his place!"
"I see," Black Hat said with a knowing smirk. "Well, I'm sure some other sun-themed hero will turn up soon. Those golden boys are a dime a dozen around here." He gestured to the woman beside him. "Allow me to introduce my new Head of Sales, Lita Ladrona."
"Um…buenas noches, Miss Penumbra," Lita said, extending her hand unsurely.
"Oh, of course!" Penumbra said, eagerly shaking her hand. "I saw you in the last commercial! The one with the nuclear freeze ray? You're an inspiration to villainesses everywhere, young miss!"
Lita blushed. "Um…thanks?"
"You'll have to tell me more about that ray later. I've been thinking of using it to freeze the sun!"
Lita stiffened. "Wouldn't that…destroy all life on Earth?"
Penumbra thought about it for a moment. "Perhaps. But how else am I supposed to keep the sun from burning me alive?"
The situation was clear now. "I think I could recommend some products that are a little less…overkill."
"Excellent! I'll catch you later, dear!"
As Penumbra walked between the two of them, Lita sighed heavily, as if she'd just dodged a bullet.
"You did fine," Black Hat whispered. "Now all you have to do is keep up that same attitude for the next two hundred guests."
Lita looked down at her right hand. "This thing's gonna be sore before the night is over."
She was absolutely correct. The next hundred handshakes took a toll on her hand. Mostly because half the hands she shook weren't even hands, but claws, slime, hooves. At least Mother Poltergeist's hand went right through hers. After a while, Lita didn't pay so much attention to faces, but kept her hand out with a smile on her face.
It wasn't until a certain comment from a mostly bald man in a blue mask and blue-lined tuxedo—Dark Phantom, she heard her boss say—that her smile broke.
"Well, well, well," Dark Phantom said, looking Lita over as he shook her hand. "'Bout time ya got some real eye candy around here, Blackie!"
Lita glanced sideways at Black Hat, who didn't look too happy about that comment either. As uncomfortable as she was, she had dealt with creepy flirts before. She was a woman, after all.
"So, you're a psychic, Mr. Dark Phantom?" Lita said, putting her smile back up.
Dark Phantom tilted his head in confusion. "Um…no. Why?"
She subtly pulled her hand away. "Well, how else could you have known we were serving candy eyeballs tonight?"
The masked villain's face fell and she heard a snort of laughter from her boss. Shaking his head, Dark Phantom walked past them.
"R-Right. Um…they are just candy eyeballs, right?"
Lita purposely paused before answering. "Sure."
She didn't need to turn around to see that he was now the one who was incredibly uncomfortable.
"Brilliant deflection," Black Hat said in an impressed tone.
"Best way to get rid of a creepy flirt," Lita murmured. "Act completely oblivious."
"Really? Not even kicking them in their privates?"
"Nah. Some guys actually like that."
The two of them chuckled as the next guest approached them, a buff, bull-like man. He was nearly twice Lita's size, and his choice of formalwear was a horned bronze helmet and armor, complete with a white bowtie.
"Buenas noches, Señor Black Hat!" he exclaimed excitedly, as if meeting an old friend.
"Metauro," Black Hat said, shaking his hand. "How's the family?" Metauro raised a finger to answer. "Don't actually care. Say hello to Lita Ladrona, my new Head of Sales."
"Ah!" Metauro said, holding out his enormous, metallic hand. "Hola, Señorita Ladrona!"
Seeing the spikes coming out of his knuckles, Lita worried that this handshake was going to hurt, but he was surprisingly gentle as he took her small hand in his giant one. This gave her reason to smile genuinely.
"Bienvenidos, Señor Metauro," she said. "Es un placer."
Metauro's glowing yellow eyes widened, obviously pleased that someone was speaking his native language. "¡El placer es mío, querida! ¡Eres una joven encantadora!" He turned to Black Hat. "Where'd you find this one, mi amigo?"
"Her father used to work for me," Black Hat said simply.
Lita shrugged. "It's in my blood, I guess."
"I'm a father myself," Metauro said proudly. "And to think I've been telling this old fossil to try and settle down for years! But I must say, I didn't think he'd find someone as charming as yourself."
Both Lita's and Black Hat's faces shifted into expressions of horror.
"Wait, you think…?" she started to say, pointing at him.
"…that she and I…?" he said, pointing at her.
They simultaneously stepped away from each other.
"Nope!" she exclaimed, waving her hands. "Porque no!"
"Absolutely not!" Black Hat said, recoiling in disgust.
"As if he would ever…"
"The very idea is absurd!"
"I mean he is so not my type!"
"Exactly! Wait, what do you mean by—?"
"Not to mention he's old enough to be my great-great-great-great—"
"You can shut up now," Black Hat said between his teeth.
"My mistake," Metauro said, holding up his hands. "If that is the case, then perhaps," he held out his left hand towards Lita, "you could honor me with a dance, Señorita Ladrona?"
Unsure, she glanced between his outstretched hand and her boss. Black Hat was eying Metauro suspiciously.
"Aren't you married?" the demon said shortly.
"Oh, I mean nothing romantic, I assure you," Metauro said calmly. "I just think the señorita would like a break from shaking hands all night."
"You're right about that," Lita said with a laugh, before catching Black Hat's gaze again. "But of course, if I'm needed here—"
"Go on," Black Hat said gruffly. "Everyone's nearly arrived, anyway."
Sighing in relief, Lita placed her hand in the minotaur's and he led her down the steps. Black Hat watched them out of the corner of his eye. He knew Metauro was faithful to his wife and children, so the demon wondered what he could be up to.
"I should warn you," Lita said, curtsying once they reached the dancefloor. "I'm not very good."
"That's alright," Metauro said with a bow. "My wife's not the best dancer either."
His hand was so huge, when he placed it on her waist, it practically encompassed half her body. Thankfully, as he took her right hand in his left, he moved slowly and took care not to crush her.
"I'm surprised Black Hat let you get married," Lita said, craning her neck up to look into his eyes. "He's always going on and on about how villains shouldn't involve themselves in romance or family."
Metauro chuckled, sounding like a grunting bull. "That sounds like Lord Black Hat. But he was fine with it, once I promised to send my children to his institute and camp. My little Nina is the champion in gladiatorial combat!"
Lita smirked. "My mom taught me a few things about fighting."
"Oh, is she a villain too?"
"No. And my dad's more of a second-rate criminal than a full-on villain."
"Ah. My wife's not too keen on my career choice either. I mean she's alright with it, as long as I don't kill anyone in front of the children."
When the DJ Bot had finished the song, Metauro stepped away from Lita and bowed. Just as she was curtsying, someone tapped her on the shoulder. She turned to see a man all in black. Literally, he was black all over that he looked like a shadow. The only defining feature about him was the black pipe sticking out of where his mouth should have been. Lita recognized him as the villain known as Father from the orientation videos.
"May I have this dance?" he asked with a bow.
Lita was hesitant, but she remembered what her boss had said about entertaining the guests. So, taking the shadowy man's hand, she accepted his invitation.
As the night went on, Lita got a surprising amount of attention, particularly from the male guests. She could hardly go two seconds without someone asking her to dance. She wondered if it was because of the dress, or the fact that she was a new face. It had come to a point where she was barely paying attention to what her partners were saying, as her head was dizzy from all the spinning.
After dancing for eleven songs straight, Lita made a beeline for the buffet table. She was so thirsty that she grabbed the first glass of champagne she could and downed it in one gulp. Panting, she leaned back against the table to catch her breath. Against her better judgment, she picked up another glass and started sipping it slowly.
Her eyes wandered the room. She wasn't used to crowds, especially a crowd of this variety. There were people of different species, sizes, some clearly undead in some way. If this had been a costume party, this would've been a normal sight. But no, this was how these people looked on a regular basis. And not all of them were as polite as Metauro. From what she'd seen in their files and in the orientation videos, some of them could get pretty nasty if you rubbed them the wrong way.
So, her current social awkwardness wasn't unwarranted.
"So, you're Black Hat's newest henchgirl," said a female voice with a slightly Southern American drawl.
Lita turned to her left to see a redheaded woman in a sleeveless green gown, sipping a glass of wine. The hem of her skirt was lined with faux leafy vines. Honestly, she looked pretty normal compared to the rest of the crowd.
"Uh, yeah," Lita said, attempting small talk. "Been here for about…nine months."
The redhead leaned forward, looking her over. "If this were a nunnery, I'd think you were here for family matters."
Glancing down at her stomach, Lita blushed and forced a laugh. "Good one. I'm Lita Ladrona, by the way."
The redhead studied her extended hand for a moment before taking it. "Poison Ivy. Ivy, to my friends. But I don't believe we're that acquainted yet."
Deciding she liked this woman, Lita looked down at Ivy's plant-themed dress. "I can guess what your superpower's all about."
Ivy shrugged. "Not so much a superpower, more like a talent. I'm a biochemist. I let the plants do the work for me."
"Explains why you joined the organization," Lita said with a nod. "We have a lot of dangerous plants at the greenhouse." She leaned towards Ivy. "Not judging. Carnivorous plants need to eat too. But last week, the Venus flytrap nearly bit my arm off!"
Poison Ivy scoffed. "Give me a minute alone with it, and it could swallow you in one gulp." She sipped her wine casually. "And what exactly do you do?"
"Well, I'm Head of the Sales Department," Lita said, "but I was originally hired for my thieving skills. Hence, the name." Ivy raised an eyebrow. "You know, ladrona? Spanish for 'thief?'"
When it was obvious Poison Ivy didn't know much Spanish, Lita gulped down the rest of her champagne, hoping that it would make her look less socially awkward. It didn't.
"So," Ivy said, tilting her glass, "how did you get mixed up with a creep like Black Hat?"
She gestured to the other side of the ballroom, where Black Hat was chatting with a tall, red, demon-like being with crab-like claws, dressed in feminine attire. Lita vaguely remembered the guy from the orientation videos, but couldn't remember his name.
"Oh, you know," she said, leaning back against the table. "My papi owed him money, I sold my soul so he wouldn't get hurt."
"Ah," Ivy said, sipping her drink. "That dispels some of the rumors going around."
"What rumors?" Lita asked, genuinely curious.
"Oh, just what's to be expected of any woman working for a man." She leaned in to whisper. "Not that it's any of my business, but you two aren't…involved, are you?"
"Why does everyone think…?" Cheeks red, Lita slammed down her empty glass. "Let me just set the record straight. My relationship with Black Hat is strictly professional. And before you ask, no! He hasn't made any advances of any kind! Between you and me, I don't think there's a romantic or sexual bone in that guy's body! Oh, he might tease you now and then, but he's never serious about it!"
"That's a…relief," Ivy said, still sounding suspicious. "My partner, Harley, wasn't so lucky with her last boss. She's over there with your lizard friend."
She pointed to the corner of the room. Dementia was giggling with a pale woman in a red and black dress, her two ponytails dyed the same colors.
"Better watch out," Ivy whispered. "I think they're planning an elaborate prank."
"Sounds like something Dementia would do," Lita said.
"It's so rare that Harley finds someone as childish as her. It's a good thing I'm not the jealous type."
At that comment, Lita glanced between Harley and the way Ivy was looking at her. "When you say 'partner,' do you mean partner in crime, or…?"
With a small smile on her face, Ivy swept some hair behind her ear. "A little bit of both."
First Megamind, then Hawk Moth, then Metauro, now Poison Ivy. Lita was beginning to wonder if any of the villains followed Black Hat's Rule 10V3.
Ivy seemed to know what Lita was thinking as she murmured, "Don't go telling your boss. He's not very…open-minded about these sorts of things."
"Oh, I know!" Lita threw her head back with a groan. "I can't tell you how many times I've heard the whole 'love is a waste of time' speech! Honestly, I don't know why Dementia even bothers! Especially with the way he throws her around all the time!"
"Some girls would take a little pain over not being lonely," Ivy said, casting another glance at her partner. "When I first met Harley, she was a hot mess of low self-esteem. When I realized what her crazy clown of an ex had done to her, I took her under my wing, gave her some much-needed confidence, taught her that she could commit spectacular crimes without a man just fine."
Lita kept her gaze on Dementia, noting how she was ogling at Black Hat from across the room. "So, what you're saying is…I should try…being a friend to Dementia?"
Poison Ivy shrugged. "It worked with Harley."
Lita huffed. "Like that'll work! She already thinks I'm out to steal her beloved, and won't listen to a thing I say!"
"It can be a little hard to reach Harley sometimes too." Ivy paused as she watched Harley and Dementia playfully shove cupcakes into each other's faces. "But if no one treats her like a human being, she'll never feel like one."
Lita considered this, but her eyes weren't focusing on Dementia. Rather, they were focusing on the top-hat-wearing demon across the room.
"I guess you're right," she said, reaching back for another champagne glass.
Before she could take a sip, Flug came running up to her.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" he exclaimed, lowering her glass with his hand. "I-I think you've had enough! Trust me." He set her glass back onto the table. "You don't wanna get drunk around this crowd."
Lita glanced at Ivy, who shrugged. "He's not wrong."
"Sorry, Flug," Lita said. "It's just a bit…overwhelming. All these people in one place."
"Maybe a dance will help you take your mind off things?" Flug asked, holding out his hand.
Smiling, she accepted his hand. "Sure."
Across the room, Black Hat was only half-listening to Him's ranting about his custody battle with Mojo Jojo over the Rowdyruff Boys. But Black Hat's attention kept wandering over to Lita, still unable to process how elegant she looked in that ballgown. She was dancing again, this time with Flug. They both looked comfortable and friendly as they giggled at whatever joke they had shared.
Of course, Black Hat couldn't have helped but notice the numerous male villains asking her to dance. And she had accepted all of them. That was good. He'd told her to play nice, to entertain the guests. It was for this reason that he'd taught her to waltz.
Then why did he feel so…perturbed?
"So now Mojo and I have a sort of time-share worked out," Him droned, saving the champagne glass in his claw. "I get the boys Thursday through Friday, he gets them Monday through Wednesday, and Sundays…well, we flip a coin." He chuckled. "A two-headed one, of course. I know Butch is always excited to be in my realm, but Brick is always jabbering on about some shiny new invention of Mojo's, and Boomer…well, let's just say he didn't get his brains from my side of the family."
Him sipped his glass. "I see why you're always discouraging us from marriage, Lord Black Hat. Divorces are excruciating, and we weren't even married to begin with! Don't you agree?"
"What?" Black Hat said, snapping his gaze back to the other demon.
"Oh, marriage isn't all bad," Metauro said. "As long as you have a spouse who is supportive in your criminal endeavors."
Dark Phantom, who had obviously had too much to drink already, laughed loudly. "Y-You're only—hic—s-saying that cuz you d-don't wanna be in the c-cat-doghouse!"
"I'm so glad I resorted to adoption!" Father said, lifting his glass. "Forget the wife, just get the kids! And make them into smaller, eviler versions of you!"
"Here, here," Him said as they clinked their glasses together.
Black Hat rolled his eye. "You call yourselves villains! But all I ever hear from you saps these days is children this, family that!"
"Not me!" Dark Phantom shouted. "Still a—hic—eligible bachelor here!"
"Don't care," Black Hat said bluntly.
Before he could take a sip of his champagne, someone threw their arms around his shoulders from behind. That someone turned out to be Dementia, who was covered in frosting for some reason.
"Hey, honeybun!" she cooed, circling her finger on his chest. "Aren't ya gonna ask me to dance?"
The other villains snickered, while Black Hat groaned in annoyance. He was itching to toss her through the wall again, but he had sworn to himself to refrain from violence tonight. Unless a hero infiltrated the party, of course.
Thinking on how Lita had rubbed off Dark Phantom earlier, Black Hat grinned wickedly.
"I have a better idea, darling," he said, gently removing Dementia's arms as he turned to face her. "How about you go to the broom closet on the third floor," he leaned forward to whisper, "and I meet you there in say…five minutes?"
Dementia's expression turned from shocked to delighted to crazy eager, all within a span of six seconds.
"O-Okie d-dokie, my love!" she said, shaking excitedly. "I'll see you in five!"
She bolted off, leaving a cloud of dust behind her. Black Hat chuckled as he turned back to his guests.
"And that, gentlemen," he said, raising his glass, "is how you get a desperate woman off your back."
"Sick—hic—burn, dude!" Dark Phantom exclaimed, spilling his own glass as he attempted to raise his.
"Very sneaky," Father said.
"I've always preferred subtlety over brute force," Him said, putting his claw dramatically to his chest.
Metauro didn't appear so impressed. "Must you be so cruel to the woman, mi amigo? She has very much affection for you, and you take advantage of it."
Black Hat frowned. "Well, what do you expect me to do? Give into the affections of a woman who disgusts me?"
"You can still get—hic—laid!" Dark Phantom said, leaning his elbow onto Black Hat's shoulder. "You wouldn't even have to ask! She'd be—hic—all over ya like…like…whipped cream on toast!"
"I've no interest in such nonsense." Black Hat grunted as he shoved the drunkard off. "Especially with that reptilian dunce!"
"P-Perhaps ya'd rather," Dark Phantom slurred, "b-bang Bag Boy over there!"
"That spineless shrimp?!" Black Hat gagged. "Don't make me lose my lunch! If you do, I'm having you for supper!"
"What about that charming new secretary of yours?" Father said, looking to where Lita and Flug were dancing.
"She's not my secretary. She's my Head of Sales, and my best thief." Black Hat followed his gaze. "And what about her?"
"You two seem to get along well," Metauro said.
"And she is delightfully cocky," Him said with a chuckle. "Don't think I missed that commercial where she disintegrated you."
"She got a lucky shot in!" Black Hat snapped, causing the other men to snicker.
"Aw, yeah," Dark Phantom said, licking his lips. "I r-remember that pretty n-number she wore."
"Yes," Father said with a nod. "That gown also suits her quite nicely."
"Nice skin." Dark Phantom's eyes rolled over in Lita's direction. "And that rack of ribs…"
Black Hat clutched his glass tightly. "You speak of her as if she were a piece of meat."
Dark Phantom scoffed. "What do you—hic—care? D-Don't you—hic—eat h-humans like meat?"
"We're merely complimenting her appearance," Father said. "Even you have to admit she's easy on the eyes."
"It's no w-wonder you hired her," Dark Phantom leered. "I'd p-pay a million for her services!"
"I did not," Black Hat said between his teeth, "hire her for her physical appearance! Lita is a very talented and intelligent woman and has already accomplished so much in her short time here! She is not livestock for you to bid on!"
The champagne glass shattered in his claw. The other villains stared at him in bewilderment.
"I must say, Lord Black Hat," Metauro said, smiling knowingly beneath his helmet, "I have never heard you talk about one of your subordinates this way."
"Oh, ho, ho, isn't it obvious?" Father said, leaning towards the minotaur to whisper. "He wants the dame for himself!"
Black Hat narrowed his eye. "You better not be implying what I think you're implying! My relationship with Miss Ladrona is strictly professional! Same with all my subordinates!" He crossed his arms. "And I certainly hope none of you have forgotten Rule 10V3!"
"Who said anything about—hic—love?" Dark Phantom said. "We're talking about getting laid!"
Black Hat was about ready to wring the young villain's neck. "You think a superior being such as myself has time for such petty indulgences?!"
"Told ya!" Dark Phantom said, elbowing Father. "He's a fucking virgin!"
"I am not!" Black Hat shouted, stomping his foot.
"Ooh!" the villains said collectively.
"Oh, grow up! I'm two thousand years old!" He smoothed out the front of his tuxedo. "I simply have better things to do with my time! And it's not like I need to! Demons have no reason to procreate, as we are immortal!" He turned to Him. "Back me up on this, will you?"
"It's true," Him said with a shrug. "Our kind has little reason to reproduce." He smiled brightly. "Now adoption, on the other hand, can be very fulfilling!"
"Oh, yes!" Father exclaimed. "And so entertaining! Especially when the little devils are as destructive as yourself!"
Black Hat facepalmed himself. "And this is why you all have yet to conquer the world."
"So…you're not banging the broad?" Dark Phantom asked.
"No!" Black Hat yelled, tiny flames erupting at his feet. "How many times do I have to make that clear to you?!"
"So, then," Dark Phantom said with a grin, "y-you won't mind if I—hic—ask her to dance?"
Black Hat's face fell. It took him a while to answer.
"N-No," he stammered, placing his hands behind his back. "N-Not at all!" Dark Phantom didn't hesitate to cut across the room. "A-After all, she's a grown woman. She can dance with whomever she likes."
The cocky stares from his guests caused his cheeks to darken.
"I'm getting a new glass," he said abruptly, before making a beeline for the nearest Hatbot with a tray.
Snatching up a fresh glass of champagne, Black Hat searched the crowd. He found Dark Phantom just in time to see him wedge himself between Lita and Flug. Shoving the scientist aside, he swept Lita into his arms and began clumsily waltzing her around.
Black Hat's claw gripped around his glass. Why didn't Flug put up more of a fight? Why wasn't Lita putting up more of a fight? Why was she letting that scumbag touch her?! At least while she was dancing with Flug, Black Hat didn't have to worry about her dignity!
Then he remembered that she was only doing what he had instructed her to do. The discomfort on Lita's face was evident that she didn't actually want to dance with this drunken clown. Indeed, Black Hat certainly trusted Lita not to get carried away with any men. The men in question, however, were a different story. Even now, other villains were eyeing her, probably thinking the same thing Dark Phantom was thinking.
Why did this bother him so much? Why did seeing those slimy hands touch her make his skin crawl? Why did seeing those bastards leer at her from afar cause steam to come out from beneath his hat? Why was it when he overheard a lude comment directed at Lita, did he have the sudden urge to strangle every male in the room?!
His second glass of champagne didn't last long, so he grabbed another. This time, he downed its contents before shattering it.
This was ridiculous. They weren't in a relationship. Black Hat had no claim over Lita in that respect. He had no right to be envious. He just couldn't stand the sight of her dancing with other men!
"So I was—hic—fighting this hero Vanity!" Dark Phantom said at a volume loud enough for the whole room to hear. "A-And I was r-really punching him hard! Y-You know that guy has p-pretty great hair? Mine's good too! D-Don't let the balding fool ya, I'm not even thirty yet!"
"R-Right," Lita said, her nose crinkling at the smell of alcohol emanating from him.
She really wanted to ditch this guy. He'd rudely pushed Flug aside and had started dancing with her without even asking. He was obviously drunk, and was stepping on her feet more often than she had done the first time she'd danced. But she remembered she had to play nice with these people. They were clients, after all.
"Hey, I have an idea!" Dark Phantom shouted, spinning Lita harshly, causing her to yelp.
He pulled her in tightly, a lusty grin on his face. "I hear there's a broom closet on the third floor. What say you and I get nice and…cozy?"
Deciding enough was enough, Lita pushed against his chest. "Um…no, thanks. I'd rather not."
But his grip on her was too tight. "Aw, come on, babe! How can ya say no to a—hic—guy like me?"
She winced as his stinking mouth drew nearer. "Okay, for starters, you're as drunk as fuck right now, and you clearly aren't thinking straight. So, yeah, obviously I'm really uncomfortable with this." She struggled to reach down to her leg. "So if you would kindly get off of—YIPE!"
She felt his hand on her rear. He only laughed.
"Gimme a chance, doll! You might actually have some—FUCK!"
Dark Phantom suddenly let go of Lita, clutching his hand, which had somehow twisted all around. Several heads turned in their direction. Before Lita could process what was happening, she felt familiar cold hands on her shoulders. She didn't need to turn around. The terrified look on Dark Phantom's face was enough.
"The lady," Black Hat growled next to her ear, the room darkening slightly, "said no."
Whimpering, Dark Phantom scampered as far away from the angry demon as possible. Smiling, Lita turned to face her boss.
"Thanks."
"My sincerest apologies for that, my dear," Black Hat said in disgust. "Some villains have no class."
"Oh, and you do?" Lita said coyly.
That put a small grin on his face. "But of course, my dear. If you'll remember, my dancing skills are impossible to be rivaled."
Deciding to mess with him a bit, Lita put her finger to her chin, pretending to think. "I don't know, boss. I've danced with at least a dozen other guys tonight."
He saw her game, and was all too willing to play. "Then allow me to remind you of how excellent a partner I am."
With the flourish of a gentleman, Black Hat bowed before the lady, grinning toothily as he held his hand out to her.
"May I have the pleasure?"
Giggling, Lita lifted her skirts and bent down low. "The pleasure is mine, sir."
As she rose up, she took his hand. Without taking his eye off her, Black Hat slowly pulled her in, his other hand encircling her waist. Lita tried not to blush as she settled her left hand on his shoulder.
He led her into a waltz, his eye taking in every detail of her. With every step, her gown swished like a graceful black cloud. After a quick turn, she eased back into his hold, not missing a beat.
"You've been practicing," he said.
Lita shrugged. "Didn't wanna embarrass myself."
"Of course," Black Hat said, glancing around at the villains staring curiously at them, "you've had much opportunity for practice."
"Just…entertaining the guests," she said, biting her lip. "Like you said."
He signaled for her to spin again, but he made her stop halfway through so she was facing outward. Snaking his right hand around her stomach, he pressed her back against his chest. Watching his left hand hold hers out to the side, she allowed him to guide her in slow circles.
As he did this, Black Hat sent each of his male guests a warning look. Spinning her back into the standard waltz position, he tightened his grip on her waist, deliberately bringing her an inch closer.
The message was clear. Lita was his property. And if anyone so much as touched her in an unseemly way again, he would bite their fingers off one by one. He trusted Lita not to fall prey to these pigs, but he would not let her be defiled by force. This wasn't a matter of jealousy, but a matter of ownership. He would not let his property be damaged!
At least, this was what he kept telling himself as he continued to hold her close.
Noticing his glare, Lita cocked her head. "Did I do something to upset you, sir?"
"Hmm?" Black Hat said, turning his attention back to her. "Oh, no, my dear! I was just wondering if any other guests have treated you…unpleasantly, this evening. After all, you've attracted…quite a bit of attention."
Lita lowered her eyes slightly in embarrassment. "I-I don't know why everyone keeps asking me to dance, sir. I don't mean to encourage anybody, you know? But you did tell me to dance with anyone who asked."
Black Hat was simultaneously regretting that command, and raising an eyebrow at her words. Did she really not know why she was getting so much attention? Didn't she realize how exquisite she looked tonight?
"But they're not all bad, I suppose," Lita said, locking gaze with him again. "Metauro was really polite, and I had a nice talk with that Ivy chick. And Flug's a pretty good dancer."
"Is he?" His hold on her hand tightened. "I hardly think his skills are anywhere equal to mine!" Lita snickered. "What's so funny?"
"You're jealous!" she exclaimed teasingly.
"I am…" Black Hat's cheeks darkened. "Am not! I'm the most superior being in this room! I have nothing to be jealous of!"
Laughing, she patted his shoulder. "You're right, boss. You can relax. You're still my favorite."
He tilted his head. "Favorite?"
"Dance partner!" she said quickly. "Favorite dance partner!"
As he spun her once more, Black Hat inhaled sharply. "You smell…different."
Lita shrugged as she moved back into position. "Dementia did hit me with a lot of perfume and hairspray."
She didn't mention that he smelled different too. His breath was less like rotting flesh and more like spicy barbeque. Kind of made her hungry.
"No, that's not it," he said, taking another whiff. "Did you shave recently?"
"How did you even…?" She blushed. "Um, y-yeah. Flug suggested it."
"That explains it," he said bluntly. "I don't like it."
"That's…fine?" Honestly, she wasn't sure about how she felt about his opinion. "I don't like it either." She lowered her voice as he took her left palm in his right. "It's really uncomfortable." They started turning, occasionally switching palms and turning in the opposite direction. "And the whole thing Flug said about pheromones? I don't think it matters to these guys!"
"Indeed." He sent his male guests another warning look. "These men don't pay attention to the scent of pheromones, unfortunately."
"Wait." She looked at him in shock. "You can actually…smell that?"
"Are those highlights permanent?" he said abruptly, guiding her back into their starting position.
His attempt to change the subject didn't get past her, but she let it slide. "Uh, no. Dementia says I just have to wash it out. Unless she pranked me and it is permanent." She hung her head slightly. "It's awful, isn't it?"
"No, no!" Black Hat said a little too quickly, causing her to lift her head back up. "It…it suits you." He shook his head. "O-Of course, what you do with your hair is your business!"
"But," she said unsurely, "you like it?"
His eye flickered to the ceiling. "I don't hate it."
Lita giggled. "Well, boss, you look pretty distinguished in that tailcoat."
"Even if too reminiscent of Charles Dickens?"
"The style works on you."
The waltz was reaching its climax, and Black Hat felt it was time to up his game. After another turn, Lita was caught off-guard as she was led into a slow dip. He was grinning, a mischievous glint in his eye. She breathed heavily as she stared up at him, wondering what he had in mind.
"Hold tight," he whispered.
She felt herself being lifted into the air. On instinct, she threw her arms around her partner's neck. He held her to his side, his arm around her waist as he spun her through the air, her gown swishing around them. Lita felt like she was flying, and the adrenaline coursing through her veins caused her to laugh. Black Hat joined in her laughter, spinning her a few more times before gently setting her back onto her feet.
"You truly are the best dancer here," Lita said coyly.
"And you've improved greatly," he said simply.
"For a second there, I thought you were gonna toss me through the ceiling!"
He scoffed. "Now what kind of a gentleman would I be if I let anything happen to my dance partner?"
When their eyes met once more, their smiles faded.
Every other dance tonight had been awkward and tense, with the exception of Metauro and Flug. But the moment she'd found herself back in Black Hat's arms, Lita felt safe. He had done far worse than any other villain here. How was it that she felt the safest in his arms?
She also hadn't stumbled once since the waltz had begun, despite having done that several times the first time they had danced. They moved gracefully together, as if…they'd always been meant to do this.
These thoughts swam through her head as she stared into his eye. Once upon a time, that one-eyed gaze of his would've sent a frightening chill up her spine. Now, it sent a warm tingle. He truly wasn't that hideous-looking in this form. If one looked past the fact that he seemingly had no nose nor ears, he appeared no different from any other man. Even those sharp fangs of his were more welcoming than threatening.
Black Hat couldn't take his gaze off her. Not just because that was the rule of dancing. He'd acknowledged her human attractiveness before. The words "pretty" and "lovely" had come to mind.
Tonight, was the first time he ever considered her to be beautiful.
"Lita?" he said softly after a long pause.
"Yes?" Lita replied, her voice even quieter.
He curled his fingers over her hand. "Does this…bother you?"
Wondering what he meant, she looked over to their hands. His black, demon talons were laced with her small, honey-colored fingers. That's when she noticed something off. Quite a few things, actually.
"N-No," she said. "But…are you alright, boss?"
He tilted his head. "What do you mean?"
"Well…you're not wearing your gloves and…your hands are…not cold?"
Black Hat glanced briefly at his bare hand holding her partially gloved one. "Is that a problem?"
"No, it's just…" She trailed off when he locked gaze with her again. "Never mind."
In reality, the revelation had come as a surprise to Black Hat as well. Why was he warm? And why did this always seem to happen whenever he was around her?
He knew why he had removed the gloves. Ever since he had first touched her hand in Paris, he'd been wanting to feel her skin again. He hadn't done anything outlandish, of course, but he'd figured dancing would be a good enough excuse. He couldn't feel her whole hand, but he could feel her fingers. They were small, but strong. Excellent for picking locks and throwing punches. Her skin was as smooth as he remembered.
And warm. Very warm.
The song ended, and Lita sighed internally, thinking this meant the end of their dance. But the moment she tried stepping away from him, he only pulled her back in.
He wasn't ready to let go of her warmth just yet.
The next song started, this one much slower. The associates Black Hat had been conversing with earlier watched slack-jawed as the couple continued their dance.
"Well, I'll be damned," Him said.
"He actually did it," Father said.
"Pay up, señores," Metauro said, holding out his hand.
Groaning, Father and Him dug into their pockets and each handed Metauro a twenty-dollar bill. He would exchange them for pesos later.
"How did you know he would take her for a second round?" Father asked. "I've never seen the guy dance with anyone for more than one song!"
"Oh, I had a feeling that this girl was special," Metauro said, holding the bills up to the light to ensure that they were real. "That is why I asked her for a dance, to see if I was correct."
The other two villains looked at him impressed.
"You were trying to make Black Hat jealous?" Father asked.
Metauro nodded. "Except I was a gentleman." He glanced at Dark Phantom, who was passed out at the buffet table, still cradling his broken hand. "I have no death wish."
Meanwhile, Lita was starting to notice the amount of attention she and Black Hat were receiving. "Uh…boss?"
"Yes?" he said with a smile as he continued their waltz.
"Don't you think…?" She glanced around. "Everybody…everyone's staring at us."
"Of course, they are," he replied simply. "I am the host, and you are the belle of the ball."
Lita tried not to blush at that last part. "But don't you think…? Won't they think…think that we're…?"
The words were caught in her throat.
"A true villain," Black Hat said in a whisper, "wouldn't care what others think."
She blinked. "That's…pretty much the opposite of everything you've told me about being a villain!"
He shrugged as he turned her. "At the end of the day, it's not about what your style of villainy is, but doing what you want and not letting others stand in your way."
Lita thought about this as she glanced at the onlookers. She could only imagine what they were all thinking, seeing her and Black Hat dancing so intimately, laughing like old friends. She caught Poison Ivy's raised eyebrow as she waltzed by with Harley. Ivy probably thought Lita had been lying about her relationship with her boss being strictly professional.
Maybe it wasn't. Lita wasn't romantically involved with him, of course, but she was still fond of him. She could consider him a friend, though he would forbid her from ever using that word. That explained why she felt so secure in his arms. At least, that's what she thought.
She was certain about one thing. She did not want to go back to dancing with strangers. Once her dance with Black Hat ended, as it eventually would, other men would still ask her, and have difficulty taking no for an answer.
People had been accusing her and Black Hat of being somehow involved all night. Why not let them think that? After all, no one would risk moving in on Black Hat's territory.
Closing her eyes, slowly and deliberately, she allowed her head to fall onto her partner's shoulder. He stiffened at this, but did not push her away, so she remained there.
The many murmurs and gasps in the room intensified.
Black Hat did not know what to make of the situation. Once upon a time, she would've shied away from his touch. Now she was practically embracing him! How could she be so comfortable around him? He didn't understand it! And why do this in public? All the other villains were suspicious enough as it was!
"W-What are you doing?" he whispered harshly.
Lita clutched his shoulder. "I…don't wanna dance with anyone else tonight. Is that alright?"
Black Hat blinked. "It's, uh…it's fine."
Truth be told, he didn't want her pulling away from him. The feeling of her head on his shoulder was…pleasant. Maybe it was the warmth, or the wondrous smell. Underneath all the hairspray and perfume, it was still her scent.
Absentmindedly, his claw rose from her waist and started combing through her ponytail. It was stiff from the spray, and curlier than usual, but it was still her hair.
She didn't object to this action, finding it soothing, and closed her eyes contently. Suddenly, neither of them cared who was watching anymore. Villains did what they wanted, after all.
Across the room, Flug was watching his boss and his favorite coworker waltz. Just like the first time he'd seen them dance, their gazes had been locked with intensity. But now their movements had become much more intimate. Flug practically shrieked the moment Lita rested her head on Black Hat's shoulder, and was even more shocked when he seemed to welcome the gesture!
"What in the name of Stephen Hawking are they doing?!" Flug exclaimed.
Beside him, 5.0.5. let out a squeal that sounded like, "Wee-wee!"
The scientist turned to him in horror. "W-What do you mean you're finally getting a mommy?"
"Broo!" the bear said, pointing to Lita and Black Hat excitedly.
"5.0.5., we talked about this!" Flug said, shaking him by the shoulders. "You can ship fictional characters! Not real people!"
"Buh-ruh-ruh," 5.0.5. said with a pout.
"They do not…" He lowered his voice so others wouldn't hear. "They do not make a cute couple! Don't you know what kind of man Black Hat is, 5.0.5.?"
"Mrrf-fuf-ruf!"
"Well…yes, he does seem…calmer when he's around her, but that doesn't mean they're…" Flug gasped suddenly. "Dementia! Where's Dementia?!" He gripped the sides of his bag. "Oh, no, no, no, if she sees this…"
Sure enough, Dementia appeared at the top of the stairs, searching for Black Hat after waiting in the closet for fifteen whole minutes. She figured he was caught up in a business deal or something. What other reason would he avoid her?
But just as she started going down the steps, she spotted him and her body went still. There he was. In the middle of the dancefloor. With Lita. Her head was on his shoulder. He was stroking her hair.
And they were dancing!
In all the parties Dementia had attended, Black Hat hadn't danced with her once! But was willing to dance with Lita at her very first?!
Dementia clenched her hands into fists, grinding her teeth together with a growl as the hot jealousy that had been simmering for months finally came to a boil.
Charging down the rest of the way, the mutant bulldozed herself between Black Hat and Lita. "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?!"
Lita held up her hands as she stepped back. "Dem, calm down!"
"Don't you 'Dem' me, you little tramp!" Dementia said, poking her harshly in the chest. "Was this your plan all along?! I make you look all hot and sexy only for you to steal my honey right out from under my nose?!"
"We were just dancing!"
"Yeah, right!" Dementia huffed. "You've been 'just dancing' with dudes all night! But you," she said pointing between Lita and Black Hat, "were cuddling him just now like he was your fucking teddy bear!"
5.0.5. grunted, as if to say, "What do I have to do with this?"
"That was…" Lita shook her head, feeling an explanation for that would only make things worse. "There is nothing going on between me and Black Hat! And even if there was," she turned back to the crowd of villains staring, "which there isn't," she faced Dementia again, "it's none of your business anyway, because you're not his girlfriend either!"
Laughing, the lizard-girl placed her hands on her hips. "Oh, you wish that was the case, you little slut!"
Lita had been called many things. "Thief," "thug," "hooligan." But those names had at least been somewhat justified. That four-lettered word, however, triggered her emotions like a light switch. Because it just wasn't true! The fact that she'd drunk two glasses of champagne earlier didn't help.
"Y-Yeah?" Lita said, her nostrils flaring as she breathed heavily. "Well, you…you're…" She stomped her foot. "¡Métetelo por el culo, mamahuevo!"
Those who understood Spanish gasped. Dementia looked about ready to murder.
"Oh?" the mutant said, crossing her arms. "So that's the way ya wanna play it, huh? Well then… ¡Que te folle un pez!"
More gasps, including one from Lita. She had never heard Dementia speak Spanish, so it was surprising that she not only understood it, but knew some pretty lewd insults! Then again, most of the island's residents were bilingual.
Lita narrowed her eyes. It was so on!
"¡El burro sabe más que tu!"
Dementia laughed as she shoved her. "¡Eres tan fea que hiciste llorar a una cebolla!"
Lita shoved back. "¡Te voy a dar una hostia que no te regeneraras lo suficientemente rápido!"
Dementia stepped towards her. "¡La mona aunque se vista de seda, mona se queda!"
Lita stepped so that their noses were touching. "¡Peina bombillas!"
"Mamón!"
"What the hell are these broads saying?!" Father shouted in frustration.
Metauro whispered in his ear, causing Father's yellow eyes to widen.
"My, how scandalous!"
This comment from Father reminded Lita that they were not alone. By now, the music had stopped completely and all eyes were on her and Dementia.
"Dem," Lita said, taking a deep breath. "We're both adults here. Why don't we just calmly go outside and talk this o—"
But Dementia wasn't ready to make piece, "Oh, vete a freír espárragos, you puta!"
Any patience Lita had held for this mutant snapped in an instant. "Come at me then, chica!"
Kicking up her leg, Lita reached for her garter and drew the dagger she'd had concealed in it. There were many gasps.
"Oh!" she said, addressing the room. "Like none of you snuck any weapons in here!"
After a pause, several villains shrugged.
"Oh, ho, ho!" Dementia cried, crouching down. "Bring it on, bitch!"
She pounced at Lita, but the smaller woman was ready. At the last possible moment, Lita ducked, holding her knife up as Dementia soared over her. The mutant cried out as her belly was slashed. She landed atop the buffet table, sending cupcakes soaring through the air. Not wanting to get caught in the crossfire, several villains rushed to the sidelines.
Dementia stared down at her bleeding abdomen. She licked some of the blood off her hand, along with cupcake frosting. Then she looked up at Lita, who was holding up her dripping dagger readily for the next attack.
"So, ya slashed me, so what?" Dementia said, her hand patting around the table. "Two can play at that game!"
When all she could grab was a crushed cupcake, she shot her eyes at 5.0.5. "Hey, what happened to my silverware?!"
The bear shrugged.
"Oh, well," Dementia said as she climbed down from the table. "I'm flexible."
Snatching up a champagne glass, she shattered it on the table, ignoring the splash it made on her dress.
"An eye for an eye, kid!" the mutant cried, lunging towards Lita with the sharp glass aimed at her stomach.
Lita stepped to the side and swung her knife as Dementia passed by, cutting her arm. Dementia responded by spinning around and scratching Lita's wrist. Clenching her teeth to keep herself from screaming, Lita stooped down and swept her leg beneath Dementia's, sending her to the floor.
"How in the—YOW!" the lizard-girl screamed as the other woman pinned her down.
"You've been training me for months, Dem!" Lita declared, holding the knife to her throat. "I know all your moves!"
Dementia stuck her tongue out far enough to lick Lita's hand. Not expecting this, Lita gagged and foolishly retracted her hand, now covered in slobber.
"Not all my moves, sucker!" Dementia shouted, grabbing her opponent's shoulders and rolling her to the side.
From a safe distance, Black Hat had been watching this spectacle with mixed feelings. On one hand, the violence before him was positively delightful! On the other, this was meant to be a civilized event! Not to mention those women were out for blood right now, and one of them might not make it out of this alive.
The bittersweet scent of Lita's blood filled his nostrils.
"S-Sir?" Flug said, coming up to his boss while nervously watching the fight. "P-Permission to stop this before it gets out of hand?"
He opened the flap of his tuxedo to reveal a small stun gun. Honestly, Black Hat wasn't surprised the doctor had broken the no-weapons policy as well. The demon was about to give the order when he heard his guests applauding and cheering at the top of their lungs.
"My money's on the lizard!"
"Nah, that little one's got skills!"
"This party's finally getting some excitement!"
"I bet ya fifty bucks the broad in black wins!"
"You're on!"
"On second thought," Black Hat said, sending Flug a greedy grin, "let's see how this plays out."
The scientist tilted his head. "B-But sir, L-Lita could get—"
"Don't just stand there, you fool!" Black Hat took off his top hat, revealing a bowler hat underneath. "Start taking bets!"
He shoved the hat into Flug's hands and caused a clipboard and pencil to appear out of thin air. Keeping an eye on the women clawing at each other on the floor, Flug went around the room so the guests could drop their money into the hat and wrote down their bets.
After giving each other several scrapes and bruises, Dementia and Lita started panting with exhaustion.
"You…" Dementia stood weakly, waving what was left of her broken glass. "You…suck!"
"Right…" Lita swayed, losing her grip on her knife. "Back…back at ya!"
Simultaneously, they dropped their weapons and collapsed to the floor. The crowd groaned in disappointment.
"Well, well, well," Black Hat said, hands behind his back as he moved in between the fallen ladies. "Looks like this match ends in a draw! Flug, did anyone bet on this particular outcome?"
"Um, uh…" Flug flipped through the pages on his clipboard. "Err…yes! There was one bet of a thousand pesos, sir!"
"Was there?" His grin widened. "Can you tell everyone who the lucky winner is, Doctor?"
The scientist readjusted his goggles to make sure he was reading it right. "Y-You are, sir."
There were several cries of protest as Black Hat took the hat full of money from Flug.
"Consider this a lesson for all of you!" Black Hat said, proudly placing the hat back on his head with the money inside. "Never gamble with the master!"
On the floor, Dementia and Lita lay semi-conscious. They were both covered in cuts and bruises, their hair pulled out of their dos and their gowns torn. Black Hat wasn't concerned with the mutant, as she would heal quickly, but the blood seeping out of Lita was not as appetizing as it should have been.
"Escort the ladies to their rooms," Black Hat said to Flug. "I believe they've had enough partying for one night." He glanced down at the fresh blood and broken glass. "And I'd just had this floor polished, too."
Father belongs to "Codename: Kids Next Door."
Him belongs to "Powerpuff Girls."
Poison Ivy and Harley Quin belong to DC Comics (I sincerely think Dementia and Harley would make great friends).
Penumbra, Dark Phantom and Metauro all belong to "Villainous." Metauro's personality was based off supercasey's interpretation of the character. And in the orientation videos he'd mentioned having a family.