Picking up the pieces after someone passes away wasn't as easy as people liked to think. John tried but some days were harder than others. His boys were the only thing that kept him from crawling all the way inside a bottle of whatever he could get his hands on and never come out. The only question that kept going through his mind was: what the hell happened?

They brought Sammy home from the hospital a little over six months ago. Stood over Dean after getting him his big boy bed. Talked about expanding the shop, Dean starting kindergarten, even discussing how it'd be nice if the next baby was a girl.

Those dreams ended with one massive fireball.

Now, he wanted to know how, what, andwhy. How did Mary get up on that ceiling? Why was she cut across her stomach? What started that fire? More, he wanted to know who. Who was the man he glimpsed in the corner of the nursery?

Who, what, why, and how? Those were the things he needed answers for. The cops certainly hadn't given him any. Mike and Kate didn't have any. And Mary's family? Well, their thoughts and opinions about what happened weren't things he wanted to hear.

Maybe I'm crazy, he thought as he waited for Missouri to return with the number to a man she claimed could help him find the answers he was after. Maybe there aren't any answers. Maybe what happened is just one of those occurrences that can't be explained.

His mind rejected that thought. He clearly remembered what happened that night. Mary screamed, he raced into the nursery, Sammy gurgled quietly in his crib, blood dripped on the back of his hand, Mary on the ceiling, the fire.

He recalled all of it.

He scooped up Sammy and raced from the room. Dean was in the hall, blinking sleepy eyes, and completely oblivious to the danger mere inches from him. John desperately wanted to pick him up and run from the house, but he needed to try to save Mary.

What man wouldn't attempt to rescue his wife? Only a lousy one, he thought as he ran a hand over his face. While he far from the greatest husband, and couldn't say he was the best of men, there was no damn way he was leaving that house without trying to get Mary out.

The only problem was there was no other adult there to get Sam and Dean to safety. Hating himself for what he was about to do, calling himself the worst father in the world for doing it, he handed Sammy to him, telling him, "Take your brother outside as fast as you can and don't look back!"

Dean stood there, cradling Sammy in his arms, and blinking wide, fearful eyes at him. He desperately wanted to reassure him, but he had no time. He simply hardened his voice and snapped, "Now, Dean, go!"

Dean did as ordered.

Seeing him race down the hall made his guilt triple. Not only had he failed to protect Mary, but he now placed a mountain of responsibility on the shoulders of his four-year-old son. What kind of father did that?

Not a very good one.

Dean hadn't left his or Sammy's side for the last few weeks. That didn't bother him all that much. Letting either boy out of his sight scared him shitless. His greatest fear was he'd lose them if he wasn't there to keep watch.

"Here you are," Missouri said as she walked back into the room. "You just give Fletcher a call."

"Will he talk to me?" John took the paper she held out to him. "Or will he think I'm crazy like everyone else?"

"You aren't crazy, honey." Her voice was soft but firm. "Something dark got into your house. It killed your wife." She tapped the paper with one finger. "You call Fletcher. Tell him I gave you his number. He will fix you up right."

"You're sure he can help me find the answers I'm after?"

"If anybody can help you figure out what came into your house?" She tapped the paper again. "It's Fletcher Gable."

John tucked the paper into a pocket and stood.

"Thanks, Missouri."

"You go on home now to them boys," she ordered, not unkindly. "Keep them close. Don't let them out of your sight. You gotta protect them from the dark thing that killed their mother. You understand me?"

"Yeah." He didn't have to tell her he wasn't going to lose his boys. Not like he lost their mother. "Yeah, I understand."

A/N: Hi, all! Hope this finds you well!

I want to thank everyone following and who favorited this story. I know it's a bit of a break from the norm… but that's the fun, right? ;)

Tagged to episode 1x01