Thank you all so much for reading! Please let me know what you're thinking of the story so far, hopefully now that I'll be dedicating myself solely to this story the updates won't take long. I apologize for the grammar mistakes you may find in here, as you know; English is not my native language.

Please enjoy!

"I am terrified by this dark thing that sleeps in me"

Sylvia Plath

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The room was in complete darkness but his eyes had gotten used to it already, so it wasn't hard for him to take in the figure resting on the bed next to him. He was propped on his elbow and watched her chest move up and down with the force of her breathing.

His free hand moved towards her and lingered over her face for a couple of seconds, his fingers so close to brushing against her skin. She was so beautiful, and so innocent despite the world she had been born into, despite the awful things he had shown her and the million things she didn't even dare to imagine. She had always been the purest part of himself and every time he tarnished her with his sins, he felt his soul blackening a little bit more.

As the darkness around him seemed to swallow him whole, the face of the woman next to him started to transform until she was no longer the Elena he had gone to bed with, but the seven-year-old girl who had liked to play around with her golden-haired doll everywhere she went.

The morning everything changed for him had been a gloomy one. John Gilbert was hosting one of his usual soirees and the house had been crowded with people, he had been only twelve at the time, but with more knowledge about life than any kid his age. A couple of minutes had gone by before he realized Elena was no longer where he had left her, so without losing any more time he had set out to find her.

It wasn't hard since he knew how much she liked to sneak around in her father's office and play with her dolls next to the big fireplace that kept the place warm in the winter nights. Finding her wasn't the problem, the real issue was the scene he found when he opened the door to John's favorite room of the house.

He didn't remember the man's name, but he had seen him around John's soirees quite a lot lately, he was always smiling too much and praising his mother's looks whenever he got the chance, and now he was sitting on the floor next to sweet innocent Elena. She was absorbed in her game, the dolls moving in her hands as the stranger's hand grabbed her ankle and inched higher towards her thigh.

He was pretending to play with her, his voice was sweet and gentle as he imitated the voice of one of the dolls in Elena's hands, her lips had started curving in a smile before she felt his hand gripping her upper thigh with more force than before.

"Step away from her"

To this day, Damon still couldn't remember moving towards John's desk and pulling out the gun, he could only remember the look of pure shock on the man's face and the sound of Elena's feet running towards him.

"I'm scared Damon" She had whispered as she went to stand behind him, her tiny hands fisting his shirt with the force of her grip.

The strange man stood up then, a weary look in his eyes as he started moving towards them, "You could get hurt with that, kid"

Damon sneered, his arm raising the gun higher "You're the one who'll get hurt"

The man chuckled "Give me that, son" He said as he extended his hand towards them, but before he could get closer, Damon released the safe from the gun and rested his finger on the trigger. The man backed away, his hands raised in a surrender gesture "Woah, why don't you put that down and we can talk like grown-up people"

"Back away" Damon hissed again, Elena was silently crying by now, her face hiding against his back as she clung to him for dear life.

The sound of approaching footsteps made Damon take a glance towards the door where he saw Jon standing "What is happening here?" His step-father asked as he walked into the room.

The other man gave John a preoccupied look "Your kid has misinterpreted the situation"

Damon released a dark bitter laugh, startling both men in the room "I didn't misinterpret shit"

John's eyes bore down on him; there was something in them Damon hadn't seen before, a curiosity so perverse that chilled the blood in his veins. "Why don't you calm down Damon," He said softly as he moved to stand in front of the entrance.

Damon regarded him coolly, his head cocked to the side as he lowered the gun. All the burning fury of minutes earlier seemed to have cooled down, leaving a frosting bite that was ten times scarier "Don't you forget who I am John" He said slowly "Who my grandfather is, I am not a stupid boy"

The older man regarded him with something akin to admiration "No, you certainly aren't" He said "But I am sure you got it all wrong"

"I didn't get anything wrong" Damon answered as he started moving towards John, Elena following behind "You keep him and everyone else away from her" The gun in his hand went up once again, the barrel resting against John's neck "Or I'll put a bullet right between your eyes while you sleep"

The air seemed to have been sucked out of the room, a kid shouldn't have been speaking those words or holding that gun, but Damon was no normal kid and in his world, it was moments like those that changed everything.

John had stepped aside and allowed him to leave the room with Elena and the gun. Damon guessed that was the moment where the blonde man decided he was more useful as an ally and an asset that as an enemy.

Damon had won the battle that day, but he still wanted to win the war.

Elena stirred in her sleep and the darkness around him seemed to evaporate, her face morphed once again until she was the grown woman he had kissed the night before. Unable to stop himself, he allowed one of his fingers to trace the soft skin of her cheek, the memory had left a bitter taste in his mouth and he wanted nothing more than to reassure himself she was safe and sound next to him. That he had vanquished all the monsters that once wanted to hurt her and that he was never going to allow another to get close, it was all for her, everything he did was always for her.

She remembered nothing from that day, her mind seemed to have shut down and stored all of it away somewhere she couldn't reach it and Damon was grateful for it. He had shown her some awful things growing up, but there were things he wanted to keep her away from, horrors so great that still to this day made his blood run cold. He didn't want her to be naïve and weak, but he also didn't want her to know of such evil existing in the world.

He wanted to be her executioner and her savior.

She had always been the greatest contradiction in his life.

As if somehow sensing all the attention was on her, Elena's eyelids fluttered open, her eyes finding his immediately. "Hey" She whispered groggily as she wiped away the traces of sleep with her hands.

The right corner of his lips twitched as he stared down at her "Hey" He answered.

Elena groaned and proceeded to bury her face in the pillow "I feel so foolish" Her words were muffled and he couldn't help but be reminded of the spoiled girl she was growing up, always throwing tantrums for the minimal of things, most of the times in hopes of getting his attention.

His hands reached for her, his fingers caressing her hair and moving her head gently so she could face him instead of the pillow "Don't" He whispered.

Elena sighed and proceeded to sit down on the bed, her back against the headboard and her knees tucked in front of her "I am supposed to be a grown woman, I shouldn't seek your protection" She told him and he tried to ignore the stab of unwanted pain her words brought "I shouldn't be so naïve and to expect— I know the family I was born into"

Her eyes moved away from his as she whispered the words and he felt a wave of empathy hit him, unlike him and his brother Elena had never welcomed their violent lifestyle and yet there was nothing she could do to change her fate.

"I am sorry," He said as his fingers found her cheeks and touched her skin softly "Believe it or not, I wish I could keep all of this away from you—but I can't"

She seemed taken aback by his words. After his last night outburst, he couldn't blame her, he often felt like Elena was the only one who could bring out the side of him he tried so hard to bury.

Her hand went to rest above his until their fingers were laced together and their hands were lowered from her face "I know that" She whispered and something about her expression reminded him of that scared little girl that had hidden behind him when a bad man had tried to hurt her.

Feeling the weight of the memory pressing down on his chest, Damon brought her towards him, her lithe figure being engulfed by his arms, "I've missed this, I've missed you" He confessed as he buried his face in her hair and lowered them so they were resting once again on the bed.

If she was startled by his sudden display of affection she didn't show it, she snuggled into his body and allowed him to seek comfort in her embrace "I've missed you too Damon, so much"

Later that morning, they found themselves sitting in Stefan's living room while they shared takeout from Elena's favorite restaurant. She was wearing a pair of his boxer briefs and one of his t-shirts, her hair was wild and messy, too short to be put in a bun so it kept constantly falling over her forehead.

The domestic sight in front of him stirred something in Damon that he refused to acknowledge, a longing he had pushed away since the moment he was old enough to understand his place in the world.

"I was thinking we could have a Game of Thrones Marathon," He said among bites of French toast, his night had been filled with hellish memories and he wanted to prolong the feeling of peace he felt only in her presence.

Sometimes he hated her for evoking such feelings in him, for being that one thing that kept him from being a true monster.

Elena raised a finger in the air to indicate him to wait until she finished chewing her pancakes and then proceeded to wash it away with a sip of orange juice "I promised father I was going to be at the house tonight" She said "He's having some fancy dinner and wants me to entertain the guests" The annoyed roll of her eyes indicated him she wasn't keen to the idea, and neither was him.

"He doesn't need you," He told her "Mother is capable enough to keep everyone cheerful"

He was still feeling distressed over the memories of the night before, so the idea of Elena without him in that house once again chilled him to the bone. He wanted to keep her next to him, somewhere he could be certain she was safe and being cared for, despite the way she grew up, Elena was still too innocent for her own good and he feared that would be her downfall.

"But I did promise"

He chuckled and leaned to her to remove a smudge of strawberry jam in the corner of her mouth "But I know you'll love spending an entire day with Jon Snow more"

Elena's eyes moved to the finger that still rested on the corner of her lips, he saw the way her body heated up and goosebumps broke in her skin, he was aware of how wrong it was to use her attraction to him in order to make her stay but he was long past caring, he wanted her safe and nothing else mattered.

"He'll be angry" Elena answered breathlessly as he moved his fingers over her lower lip "Real angry"

Another chuckle escaped his lips at the same time he removed his hand from her face, not without tracing a path from her lips to the base of her throat "I'll handle John"

Elena frowned, pulling herself out of the spell he had wrapped her in "I don't want you to be at odds with each other"

Damon wanted to laugh at her words but controlled himself, Elena had no idea of how much at odds he was with her father, and she couldn't know, not yet. So instead of telling the truth, he chose another way out "We won't be, Len" He said "We haven't seen each other as much as I would like lately" He told her, evoking the emotive side that he knew lived in her "You used to want to be glued to me all the time, remember?"

She laughed under her breath, her cheeks coloring and giving her an air of innocence that made something inside Damon awaken "I still do" She answered "We can have your damn marathon"

His lips widened in a grin, his eyes shining with mischief at his triumph "I'll even let you choose the episodes"

Elena laughed once again "We both know that's not true"

Their attention returned to the food in front of them and no more words were exchanged for the next couple of minutes. He observed her as she ate, he was always observing her and wondered idly if she would be strong enough to waver the storm that was coming their way.

The night fell upon them too quickly for his liking, Damon was finding it hard to get used to the darkness and the biting cold of New York in the winter after spending so many years sharing his time between Colombia and Italy. The temperature had dropped considerably so Elena had changed the pair of boxer briefs for some sweats and she was currently snuggling against him as The Rains of Castamere was playing in the screen.

Elena leaned forward to grab a handful of popcorn from the bowl they had placed into the table "Ugh why do we have to watch this episode" She asked once more as she watched Robb Stark being murdered in the screen, at the same time she stuffed her face with the popcorn she had retrieved "I hate it" She muttered with a mouth full of food.

Damon looked at her with fake outrage "It's a bloody good episode"

Elena scrunched her nose "Bloody it is" She released a deep sigh before dropping her head against his shoulder "Watching Robb Stark die will always hurt my tender heart"

"Only because he's hot," He said with a roll of his eyes.

Elena gasped theatrically "How dare you?" The words were accompanied by a jab to his side; he laughed under his breath and kissed her forehead softly. They remained in silence for a couple of minutes, watching the tragic scene developing into the screen.

Once Catelyn's Stark throat was cut off and the screen faded to black, Elena moved her head slightly so she could stare at him from where she was resting "If we were born in that world, what we would be? Not the Starks that's for sure"

He released a chuckle at the same time he pinched her nose playfully "Do you even have to ask?" He said "We're the Lannister. Stefan is as ugly as Tyrion"

"I am deeply offended by that statement, Peter Dinklage is not ugly" Her face moved closer to his, until only a few inches separated them, her brown eyes looking up at him from underneath her lashes "And who would that make us, Cersei and Jamie?"

The air seemed to sizzle around them as her eyes moved towards his lips, want and desire were etched all over her face. Damon felt his pants getting tight and the blood in his veins starting to heat up, it would be so easy, to lean down and capture her lips in a kiss… but then he would only manage to damage her more than he already had.

He took a deep breath as he tried to control himself "Don't get any ideas in your head, Len"

Elena's expression fell, one of her hands reaching to him and touching the skin of his cheek tenderly "Sometimes I think I got you figured out and then I realize I might not know you at all"

The statement made something painful twist in his gut, his mouth opened to answer her when the door of the apartment burst open and his brother strolled in calmly "What are you two doing?" He asked as he took a seat in the other remaining couch.

Damon clenched his jaw, not even trying to conceal his annoyance at the interruption "We are tap-dancing little brother, in case you missed it" He answered briskly.

"Asshole" Stefan muttered as he leaned back on his seat, oblivious to his brother inner turmoil, his eyes moved to Elena, unable to hide the shame he was feeling inside.

"Don't look at me like that" The girl answered more brusquely than she intended but her expression softened when she saw him flinch at her words "You are forgiven" She told Stefan "Even though I still think what you are doing to that poor girl is disgusting"

A conflicted look crossed his brother's features "Elena, we are no—"

She raised a hand in the air signaling him to stop "Hush, I don't want to know anything" Elena told him "it's better this way, I am already guilty by omission, I don't want to get deeper into this"

"Smart girl" Damon murmured.

She rolled her eyes at him and punched him in the leg "Shut up Damon"

Stefan smiled awkwardly; Damon could see he wanted to move past the subject of the agent's daughter. Stefan could be the most ruthless of men, sometimes he even got worried by how much his brother seemed to enjoy the illicit side of their affairs, but something had sparkled in his eyes when he told him about the girl, something that made Damon fear for the first time in a long while.

As if sensing he was under the scrutiny of his brother, Stefan's hands reached towards the bowl on the table and grabbed a fistful of popcorn "So, what are we eating?" He asked with his mouth half-filled with food.

"We?" Damon leaned forward and grabbed the bowl of popcorn that rested on the coffee table "Go get your food brother" He said before grabbing a fistful of popcorn and throwing it at Stefan.

The other man laughed and threw the food right back at him, making Elena and himself laugh. It was strange for him, hearing the sound of his own pure unaltered laugh, not laced with disdain or snark, he had laughed twice already during the day and he couldn't even remember the last time he had laughed like that before.

The mere thought was depressing as fuck. Because at that moment, surrounded by the only true family he had known Damon wished, for the first time since he was a boy, that things could be different.