Chapter 2

Reneesme Cullen

Library

My day started as it usually did: with momma showering my face with cold kisses to get me out of my slumber. My eyes fluttered open, blinking against the bright light coming in from the outside, unfiltered by the trees surrounding the house we called home. She was there, in all her beauty, like always, unchanging. My mother was a beautiful creature – despite her vampiric traits: my father attributed her ethereal beauty to the human aspects that she couldn't bring herself to leave behind, in a past life. No other vampire bit her lip or ran her hand through her hair as my mother did; it was too real to think of it as an act.

She seemed to be the combination of two totally different worlds, colliding in her eyes before me.

"Good morning, Reneesme," she cooed, brushing the hair away from my face. An adoring look graced her features, a look that never seemed to go away, even when I intruded on Bella-Edward time. My mother could never bring herself to be angry with me or disappointed, because in her heart, I could never be as such. I was the proof that she'd defied immortality in her last few minutes, proof against all those who'd told her that she was throwing away her life by marrying her father. "Would you like some breakfast?"

I scrunched up my face in disgust. Everyone in my family knew that I adored blood and would drink it all the time if I could, but Jacob had made my entire family promise that they'd try their best to feed me human food, to widen my palate or something or other. So on most days, I'd be forced to eat the same food Jacob was eating when he came over to visit us – Aunt Rose would still slip me some blood in some way to keep me satisfied – but overall, it wasn't always a bad experience.

My mother, ever the avid Jacob follower, was taking his advice too seriously and attempted to force human food onto me whenever she could. This was her way of having a daughter that was the best of both worlds: human and vampire.

"Okay," I muttered, sitting up in bed. She grinned widely and flitted away, off to the kitchen to help my Grandma Esme make me something to eat. I settled into my bed comfortably, reaching for the book perched on my bedside table and setting it on my lap with a loud thud. My human hands were a bit too small to handle such a large volume, but in bed, I was comfortable enough to flip through the pages at leisure, absorbing every single word imprinted onto it.

I was now almost a year old, but looked to be five, maybe six years old. My father and grandfather confirmed, however, that my intellect was far beyond that of a six year old… maybe even beyond that of an eighteen year old, as my aunt Rose was quick to point out. She was never good at subtlety – everyone knew she was referring to Jacob. I could never really grasp the animosity present between the two; Jacob always tried to keep a safe distance from her whenever he could, but my aunt was always around me, and Jacob was too, so they couldn't help bumping into each other.

Sometimes, she complained that Jacob spent too much time at our house, too much time with me, but then, when she saw how happy he made me, how much I laughed at his silly jokes and antics, she would shut her mouth and smile tightly. I liked my Aunt Rose – she was a very complex and strange person, even for a vampire.

And I liked Jacob too. For the first few months of my life – when I was growing rapidly and trying to grasp everything around me that the world had to offer – my mind couldn't comprehend Jacob's presence at our house. He was clearly very different from us, both in terms of aesthetics and also in terms of genetics. Everyone at home was cold, whilst Jacob was warm. My family was pale, whilst Jacob's skin seemed to shine and glow with colour. At first, I was able to deduce the differences between Jacob and family, even myself. I thought that Jacob existed alone in this universe as a warm, olive-skinned entity who visited us once in a while.

But then, sometimes, he brought his friends along with him, who looked so much like him, but then again, were so different from him as well. I started cataloguing all the different types of people one could meet in life: vampires, like my parents, shapeshifters like Jacob and his friends, and humans like my grandpa Charlie.

Once I had accepted this, there was still another matter I couldn't yet understand: why was Jacob always with us? He was obviously repulsed by certain things my family did, and he was constantly complaining of their smell, and yet, he was still drawn to us in some way.

My mother came in with a tray of food and I set the book aside to start nibbling on my breakfast. She sat on the edge of the bed, smiling down at me as I ate, before she kicked off her shoes and climbed into bed with me, getting in under the sheets and curling her body against mine.

"Do you miss the food?" I asked her, bringing a strip of bacon to her nose. She smiled as I did so, and shrugged.

"Sometimes I miss the taste of burgers and fries and really good pizza… but I don't get cravings for food anymore… it's a bit weird to get used to, I suppose."

Content with her answer, I focused my attention back on the food in front of me. When all the food was cleared from the plate – only then was my mother satisfied with my attempts to behave as a human – I placed the tray on the floor beside the bed and turned the face her. Question time was not over yet.

My mother never seemed to be irritated by my constant string of questions, about every single thing that seemed to spike my interest. I could tell that Jacob sometimes got annoyed when I asked too many questions, but my mother and father were always thrilled to answer me – knowledge is key, as my father liked to say.

"Why is Jacob always here? Logically, it doesn't make sense that he would be willingly spending his time here, since he is so different from us; and yet, he does. Why?"

My mother blinked – not because she had to, but it was a habit she hadn't gotten rid of yet. Her golden eyes danced over my face, not betraying any emotions that might have been triggered by my line of questioning. If she was surprised, or saddened, she didn't show it.

"Well, Reneesme, in the world, in life, you get family and you get friends. Family is given to you, you don't have to choose it, but friends – you have to find them for yourself. Jacob is my friend, and your friend too – he doesn't care that I'm a vampire and he's a shapeshifter, he loves me because we get along, and sometimes we make each other laugh, and help each other. And friends visit each other, because they like to spend time together. That is why Jacob is always here."

I pondered her explanation for a while. "So Jacob is your friend from when you were human?"

She nodded. "I see," I said. In the past year, I'd never grappled with the concept of friendship before… it was still a bit abstract to me. "Mother? Jacob is your friend, and so he is my friend by default. Will I ever have friends of my own?"

She smiled, but I caught a bit of sadness lingering at the edges of her eyes and her mouth. "Why, of course, sweetie, you can have as many friends as you want." She pulled me into a solid, cold embrace: my mother's hugs were different from Jacob's and the other wolves, but I still liked both kinds of hugs anyway.

Aunt Rose danced into the room as my mother was still holding me to her, and she clapped her hands enthusiastically. "Good morning, Reneesme! Let's get you dressed honey."

I couldn't help it – my eyes went wide with surprise and joy. "We're going out?! Even though it's really sunny outside?"

My high pitched words seemd to linger in the air between us. Rose's hands were still raised, mid-clap, but her smile faltered, even if for just a second. Her face went all tight and restrained, as it did when she got mad about something. Something in my stomach churned in embarrassment and guilt as I realized the sad look on my Aunt's face was my fault.

"I'm sorry, Aunt Rose – "

"No, it's not your fault. Silly me, I forgot to check the weather outside – I was so excited to try on your new outfits for you."

My mother and aunt exchanged sad looks over my head; this was always hard for them – on the rare occasion that it was actually sunny in Forks, my parents and family were confined to the rooms of their massive home, and I was sometimes forced to stay inside along with them. Sometimes, my mother would call Jacob and he'd take me out to play, against the wishes of my dear Aunt Rose, of course.

But now that she'd promised me to go out, she'd have to find a way to make me happy – and so, she sighed in frustration as she left to call Jacob to arrange an outing. Outings with Jacob generally meant crossing the border into La Push and visiting his family, or going down to First Beach to play on the sand. I didn't mind – I guess these were activities that normal five-year olds would enjoy.

My mother and aunt swapped roles when they realized that Bella was far better suited to deal with Jacob than Rosalie ever would be. Rose brushed my hair slowly, braiding it up and straightening out my clothes in a way children would dress up dolls. My aunt's love for me was sometimes intoxicating, but I enjoyed the feeling of basking in her adoration from time to time.

My mother came back into the room with a disappointed look on her face. "Uh… Jacob can't pick you up this morning sweetie – "

"What?!" Rosalie snapped, setting the hairbrush down on the bed slowly, as if to calm herself. "Why the hell not?"

"Calm down, Rose. Jacob has a job now, he can't just leave to come take Reneesme out." That seemed to shut my aunt up. "But, he'll be coming to pick her up later, for lunch. He can take half the day off, would you like that Reneesme?"

I nodded, a small smile on my lips. I didn't mind – I'd have more time to read at leisure, and spend some time with my family. My mother seemed to think that forcing me to do human stuff would make me more human, but at the same time, she also wanted to revel in the vampiric side of me. My mother was confusing. Aunt Rose helped me to change back into more comfortable clothes, and I settled down for a morning of reading whilst my father played soft, soothing music downstairs on his piano. Bella soon left my side, probably to join him and stare lovingly as he played her lullaby.

Members of my family would stop by my room to talk to me as the day progressed – Emmett attempted to rope me into one of his latest fixations, but I politely declined, whilst Jasper discussed my book with me for a while before he went to search for Alice. Esme came by to offer me food (and a small glass of blood), but apart from that, I was left to my own devices for the majority of the time.

When it was lunch time, a sharp knock on the front door alerted us that Jacob had arrived to pick me up. As my mother greeted him downstairs, I got dressed quickly and rushed down to meet him.

"Jacob!"

"Hey Nessie," he grinned, ruffling my hair as he slung an arm around my shoulders. Aunt Rosalie hissed as he did so, but he'd probably done it one purpose just to piss her off.

"Where are you taking her?" my father inquired. Edward sometimes found it difficult to hide his discomfort when Jacob came to take me out… I couldn't understand why exactly, but I supposed it had something to do with the fact that he turned into a giant wolf and took me to see other giantwolves.

"We're going to grab some lunch then we're going to meet up with Quil and Claire," Jacob informed and when my family seemed happy enough with the plan, we were allowed to leave; but not before each of my aunts kissed me goodbye, and my mother and father held me for an unnecessarily long amount of time before handing me over to Jacob.

I climbed into the Rabbit, and peered over the edge of the window as he drove us to La Push. It truly was a beautiful day, with the sun shining and the air not nearly warm, but perfect enough. I watched the trees rush past us, the dense forest that welcomed us to La Push, and then, we were stopping in front of a small diner in the middle of town. Jacob helped me out of the car and lead me to the front door – even though I didn't like human food, I tried my best to enjoy it with Jacob… maybe because a part of me desperately wanted to make him my friend, not just my mother's. We sat down at one of the booths, the old plastic seat sticking to my leg as I slid further into the booth.

"So, Ness, what you've been up to today?" Jacob asked as he eyed the menu, looking to see what he was going to devour in the next couple of minutes.

"I was reading… I'm learning Hindu."

Jacob put the menu down on the table and looked at me with narrowed eyes. "Why are you learning Hindu?"

I explained why as if it was the most plausible reason in the world for a one year old who looked five to be learning Hindu. "I need to understand Hindu if I want to read the Bhagavad Gita – Uncle Jasper has recommended it as being a very insightful book."

"Uh-uh," was Jacob's only reply, as he took the menu back into his hands. "Sounds cool… how are you getting along?"

"Very well. My photographic memory is useful when trying to memorise a dictionary."

"You're memorizing a – You know what, nevermind. Maybe you can teach me sometime?" he said with a lopsided grin. "Do you know what you're going to eat?" I nodded and he called the waitress over. As he recited his order, I watched her eyes get impossibly wider with each item he called out – this was always amusing when I went out to eat with Jacob. I added my cheeseburger and fries to his massive order before she scurried off.

"Mother said you're working now," I started and he smiled as he realized that we were easing into a conversation that was his territory.

"Yep, I'm working for – he owns a repair shop in La Push and he needed someone to help him out. I'm hoping by the time he retires he'll trust me enough to sell me his business."

"Will you have time to study?"

"Study? Why would I want to do that?"

I scrunched my face up in confusion. "Why wouldn't you want to study? Become a doctor or a scientist or something."

"Huh, I guess I never considered that," he said, stroking his chin in contemplation. "I always assumed my life would be here, in La Push, not at some fancy university in some other state."

I was about to continue the discussion when the opening of the door caught Jacob's attention. He smiled wider and I turned around to see Leah Clearwater entering the diner. My heart skipped a beat: the she wolf had always been an enigma to me, I could never fully understand her or her demeanor. From what I could gather from the other wolves, Leah was as free-spirited and wild as it could get. That was a bit strange and foreign to me, as no one in family was that way, and she represented a concept that I could not wrap my head around.

Leah had sensed Jacob before she entered the diner, because she was making her way over to us without a second thought – her face was set into a small scowl as she made her way over. Everytime I'd seen Leah, her face had always been like that. A part of me wished to see her smile – she was pretty despite the scowl on her features, so I could only imagine how beautiful she looked when she smiled.

"Hey, Leah."

"Hey," she mumbled as she came to stand by our table. She crossed her arms over her chest and I soon realized that she was staring down at me.

"Hello," I croaked out, smiling slightly. My only response was a brusque nod before she turned her attention back to Jake.

"Are you going to move your fat ass or what?" she asked, glaring at the seat until Jacob moved over so she could slide in next to him.

"Wow, Leah, nice to see you too."

"Yeah, yeah cut the crap. I forgot to bring lunch to work and I'm starving… I hope you ordered, Jacob."

I looked at them and studied their behavior. I'd seen Jacob interacting with the other wolves but I'd never seen him with Leah. Her attitude and words were completely the opposite of what my mother and father had taught my about friendship and being nice, but Jacob didn't seem to mind that she was being rude and simply shrugged his shoulders and rolled his eyes when he realized that he would have to share his food.

"Babysitting?" she asked, looking at me pointedly.

"I don't require a babysitter –"

"I meant for him," she interrupted with a smug grin on her face, earning her an elbow to the stomach from Jacob. "Ow, you asshole."

"Leah, language! Reneesme is five years old," Jacob feigned anger but he couldn't help the smile that spread across his features. Leah mouthed 'five' in silence, as if she couldn't believe that that was the age that I was going with now. To some, it must have been really difficult and strange to keep track of my growth spurts. Both Jacob and I nodded and Leah's face seemed to pale slightly. I was well aware that from the wolf pack, Leah was one of the wolves that was most repulsed by me and my family.

"It's okay… Leah's vocabulary is very interesting. No one in my family talks like her in front of me."

"You're welcome, kid," she muttered, tapping her fingers against the table impatiently.

"How's the job going?" Jacob asked.

"You're working as well?" I asked, eager to find something to talk about with the she-wolf.

Leah's eyes narrowed and her lips pressed into a tight line. It was quite obvious she was restraining an outburst. "Yes, I'm working. Not everyone can spend eternity sitting on their sparkly asses all day doing nothing."

"Le-ahh, Nessie was only asking to be polite. Ness, don't take Leah too personally. She doesn't know how to speak to people – that's why she's working in the library," Jacob explained with a small grin and a glint to his eyes. I was starting to understand that the relationship between Leah and Jacob was based on a series of verbal jabs that they would throw at each other repeatedly until one of them got really mad.

Leah started muttering something under her breath which both of us couldn't hear, but she was soon silenced by the arrival of food at our table. They both started devouring the food Jacob had ordered, barely leaving time for conversation during eating. I just watched as they ate everything in sight, slowly nibbling on a French fry as they did so. Once their food was ready, they attacked mine, as they realized that I didn't intend on eating it at all – they weren't complaining, and neither was I.

After a few minutes, the waitress came by to check on us and was shocked to see that they'd actually eaten everything Jacob had ordered. She silently took the plates and cleared the table whilst a satisfied Leah and Jacob rubbed their bellies across from me.

I tried to keep up conversation with Jacob for the rest of our stay at the diner, whilst Leah just watched me curiously. The she-wolf had leaned back into the plastic seat and kept her eyes on me the whole time: I felt as though she was sizing me up, like I was prey, but I then deduced she was only trying to understand me, like I wanted to understand her. When the time came for us to pay for the food, I slipped Jacob the money my father had given me before we left the house so that he would be able to pay with it – it was a sort of thank you from the whole family for taking me out. Leah watched this exchange in shock and disgust slowly started marring her features before she abruptly stood from her seat and announced her departure.

"So, ladies, thanks for lunch, but I've gotta get back to work," and without waiting for a response from our part, she was gone. Both Jacob and I watched her leave the diner, her shoulder-length black her swaying with each confident step she took. As she walked, I couldn't help but think that the world seemed to be molded around Leah Clearwater and her existence: the nature of La Push seemed to bend and distort around her, the wind seemed to sway with her steps and the sun seemed to beat down on her the hardest.

I had to admit: I was slightly infatuated by her – mainly because she was so strange and weird and unique like me. I desperately wanted to know more.

I followed Jacob out of the diner and we drove down to First Beach where Quil and Claire were playing in the sand. I'd met Claire a handful of times before, when I looked younger and almost her age, and the human girl did not seem to mind that I aged a couple of years every few months – she played with me regardless. Jacob and Quil settled back on the sand, talking about some football game and some pack related business whilst I indulged Claire in one of her games and played along with her childish antics until it was time to go home.

Greeted by my parents and my family, I was very eager to get back to my reading. Only this time, I disposed of the Hindu dictionary and instead entered my grandfather's vast library, trailing my fingers along the thick leather tomes on the shelves. I no longer cared for the Bhagavad Gita… my focus was now trained on gaining more knowledge about wolves.