KEN FUEGUCHI

CHAPTER 2:

COMING TO TERMS

It took a few weeks before he was discharged from the hospital. In that time, he wasn't allowed any visitors, though he had a few worried texts from the Fueguchis, Touka, and Yoshimura. He sent some back, saying he would explain once he got back home.

And there was, of course, the pain of losing Hide. The sight of Rize standing over his mutilated body was something that would be forever etched into his memory. If only he had gotten there sooner, then Hide may still be alive. His oldest friend…gone. The sad thing was, he felt not so much guilt as much as a bleak emptiness in his soul where the bond he used to have with Hide was.

His father picked him up from the hospital, and they drove back home in silence. Even so, Ken was worried. His fears about becoming a Ghoul had only worsened over time, as he didn't truly feel hungry, and the food began tasting worse and worse, even making him vomit recently.

They got back to the Fueguchi home, and he was instantly embraced by Ryoko and Hinami, told how much he was missed by them. Eventually, Hinami was sent to bed, and Ken was left with his adoptive parents. After a long, awkward silence, he asked, "Do you have any…meat? Of the sort you eat? If so, could you bring it out?"

Asaki and Ryoka looked at each other, before the former went to the fridge and brought out a lump of meat. It looked like almost any raw meat one could get at a supermarket or a butcher's, but Ken knew that it was human meat. But the smell…oh God, the smell…it was the most heavenly thing he had smelt for a long time, like his mother's cooking.

As he stared at the meat, Ryoka gasped in horror. "Ken, your eye! You have a kakugan!"

He looked up at her, and then looked into a nearby mirror, and stared. His left eye showed the distinctive black sclera and red iris of a kakugan. He began to pant hard and fast, before saying, "Please, take it away now!"

"Ken, what happened? We know you ended up nearly getting killed with Rize and your friend Hide around, but…" Asaki began.

"You don't understand! That damned doctor put Rize's organs into me! I haven't been able to eat any hospital food! I…I…"

"Don't want to eat it…I understand," Asaki said quietly, as Ryoko got up and went around to Ken, gently rubbing his back. "But…we've told you what a Ghoul's hunger is like. How awful it is. If you don't eat human flesh soon…you'll become a rabid animal, unable to reason or be reasoned with. Though how you actually became a Ghoul…it can't be as simple as implanting some organs. Who was your doctor again?"

"…He called himself Dr Kanou."

"That sounds familiar," Asaki mused, before shaking his head. "Ken…I'm sorry. I really am. But, if you really have become a Ghoul…"

Ryoko snapped, "Asaki! He's gone through enough! Hideyoshi is dead, Rize's organs are in him…can he at least sleep on it?"

Asaki nodded, running a hand through his hair. "Sorry, yes, of course." He took the human meat away and put it back into the fridge. "Ken, we're here for you. All of us are. So's Yoshimura and Touka, I'm sure. You know that because you're a part-Ghoul doesn't mean we think any less of you…"

Ken's sleep that night was haunted by nightmares, of Hide's mutilated body coming back to life and accusing him of not doing enough to save him, of Touka and Yoshimura and his family turning their backs on him, calling him a half-breed, of Rize's crazed cackling…and then, he ended up being attacked by a Dove with a briefcase. It was by that point he woke with a cry. For want of anything better to do, he went into the kitchen. Ryoko was bustling around, making coffee already. She turned and looked at him, and smiled, her eyes looking bloodshot. "Did you sleep alright, Ken?"

He shook his head mutely. Unbidden, he went over to the fridge, and plucked out the lump of meat again, tears trickling down his face. He then went and fetched some utensils, went to the table, and sat down, the meat in front of him. Slowly, ponderously, he began cutting it up, before he speared a small part of it on his fork. He stared at the crimson lump, knowing he stood on the edge of a precipice, and by doing this small act, he would forever go down the path of being a Ghoul.

It felt like an eternity, but it took seconds. Long seconds, longer than anyone should linger with a piece of meat on their fork, but seconds all the same. Ken had been around Ghouls for almost half of his life by now. He knew better than almost any non-Ghoul that Ghouls could be every bit as moral as the best human being. Indeed, they weren't monsters, merely humans who were afflicted with a cursed hunger. The Fueguchis had shown him more love than his relatives. Indeed, he remembered times when his birth mother abused him, times he wanted to forget, because his birth mother was a good person, a decent person, in spite of that. Those were isolated incidents, as far as he was concerned. But Ryoko never did that.

True, many Ghouls were monsters, like Rize, or Aogiri Tree. But not all of them were. Being a monster was a choice, and Ken Fueguchi chose to not be a monster. He would eat human flesh, and if need be, he would kill to eat, if only they were criminals like those Asaki or Touka targeted. But he would not kill just to eat, kill for the sake of killing.

With that, he put the fork in his mouth, and the morsel impaled on it came along with it.

It's like the flavour exploded in his mouth. It was so juicy and tender and nice, an indefinable flavour that nonetheless was the epitome of pleasant taste. He chewed and swallowed hastily, his desire to savour it losing out to his Ghoul's hunger to have more MORE MORE!

Pretty soon, the human meat on the plate in front of him was gone, leaving only a bloody smear, and with it, the terrible hunger he was feeling. Ken was weeping slightly. He didn't quite notice that Ryoko had come over until she was gently embracing him. "It's okay, it's okay…you're not any less my son, Ken. You're not a monster. Never think that. It's your hunger that's monstrous, not you…"

He realised she was weeping too, her tears soaking his shirt. And so, he returned her embrace…

After some discussion with his parents, Ken decided to head to Anteiku. Leaving aside the fact that both Yoshimura and Touka had left messages for him (apparently they hadn't even been allowed to send flowers to the hospital room he was in), Ken actually felt well enough to head to work. He was also worried about university. Of course, getting involved in a Ghoul attack and spending three weeks recovering from a transplant would get him some leeway, but still…

He got there, and found Touka waiting for him, a mixture of impatience and sympathy on her face. "Jeez, you look like death warmed up. I mean, more than usual. Ken, are you all right? I couldn't come in to see you."

"…I'm not all right. Listen…is Yoshimura here?"

"Yeah. Koma's off sick, so it's a good thing you came here. Though you don't look so hot. Are you sure you should be here? Ken, I don't want you going the same way as your mother…wait…why do you smell…almost like a Ghoul?"

"I'll explain it when we're with Yoshimura…"

Touka, to her credit, looked horrified, and Yoshimura looked saddened, once Ken had explained what happened. The older Ghoul said, "I suspected this happened, when I heard about what happened on the news, and joined the dots about what happened to Rize, even if I didn't think this…hybridisation would occur. I'm sorry about your friend, I truly am. I didn't realise that she was dating Hide, or else I may have found a way to warn him. And I'm sorry for your plight."

"Shit…that's a tough break," Touka said quietly. "Are you all right, Ken? No, of course you aren't, that's a stupid question." The young Ghoul sat down next to him and hugged him. She wasn't much of a hugger, usually, but Touka realised how serious the situation was.

After a moment's silence, Yoshimura broke it by saying, "Still, at least you've taken what would doubtlessly have been the hardest step, and fed. A Ghoul's hunger is hellish. Then again, you've lived amongst us for nearly a decade, and you know us better than most humans. We are here for you, Ken. Don't believe that you don't belong in either world. Even before this happened to you, you were a bridge between our worlds. A light of hope for those of us who wish for co-existence. All that has changed is your nature. Not what makes up Ken Kaneki. Listen, if you do not wish to work today, Touka and I can handle it. Aside from your change, there is, of course, your friend Hide…"

"No," Ken said, shaking his head. "I…I need to do this, to try and do something normal. It's what I need to do, to cope with all this. Please…"

"…Very well. However, I'd suggest wearing an eyepatch, Ken. A few times during the conversation, a kakugan appeared in your left eye. I believe we have one in our first aid kit. We don't want your secret coming out to the wrong people. I'll go and fetch one."

After the old Ghoul left, Ken leaned into Touka. "Touka…thank you."

"Someone's got to look after you," she said quietly. "I know what you're like, Ken. You're as gentle as Ryoko and Hinami. I'm surprised you had the guts to eat human flesh so soon. And besides, as much as Hideyoshi irritated me, I know he was your friend. He deserved better than being killed by that bitch. And you deserve better than…well, this."

"If I was caught associating with you guys, I would've been prosecuted by the CCG anyway, assuming that a Dove didn't kill me outright," Ken said. "I was still in danger, even as a human." He chuckled bleakly. "In a way, a small part of me is glad, if only because I know what it's like now to be like you, to know all the downsides of being a Ghoul. Because it means I can understand your pain properly, how difficult it is just to live with that hunger you have. But…I'll miss being able to have a hamburger steak at Big Girl's, or try Yoriko's cooking. She was a really good cook, you know, and I have to fake enjoying it now. I'll miss having chocolate. I'll miss all those tastes normal humans take for granted." He shook his head. "I'm sorry for sounding so depressing."

"You'd better be. But seriously…I'm sorry for you. Listen…next day off we both have, we're both heading to Uta's in the 4th Ward. If both Rize and Jason have kicked up a fuss here, the Doves are probably going to start sniffing around, and you'll need a mask. I'll also take you out on patrol later tonight. Rize forced her way onto some other people's feeding grounds, and I know a few people will be fighting over it, including Nishiki."

"Nishiki?" The name sounded familiar to Ken for some reason.

"He goes to Kamii University, just like you and Hideyoshi did. I think he's a pharmaceutical student."

"Oh, wait, I know him…well, I know his name. Hide mentioned him a few times as a friend of his," Ken said. "Nishiki Nishio, right?"

"Right. Though I'd put money on Nishiki having considered Hideyoshi as potential prey," Touka said. "Nishiki may not be as monstrous as Rize, but he's pretty violent and vicious, and has an overinflated opinion of himself. I heard he has a human girlfriend, though. I'll have to start getting you up to speed in how to fight, too, see if I can find a way to get you to use your kagune at will. Between Doves and other Ghouls, you'll need it."

Ken nodded, rather miserably. "Thanks, Touka."

"Look, someone's got to look after you, like I said. And this way, you can help protect Hinami, right?"

Ken nodded again, his spirits buoyed a little at the thought of his little sister. Yes…becoming a Ghoul had that as an upside, at least. His sister was a good girl, one who was cursed by fate to have a monstrous hunger for human flesh. She didn't want to kill people. And if a Dove came for her, she'd be easy prey. Ken despaired of protecting her then. But now, maybe, just maybe, he could help defend her from a world that wanted her dead. And maybe he could do the same for the others here at Anteiku…

CHAPTER 2 ANNOTATIONS:

So, Ken, thanks to his family and friends, has come to terms with being a Ghoul far more quickly than in canon. Plus, he actually has more incentive to get stronger as a Ghoul: protecting Hinami.

No numbered annotations this time.