"Come with me."
The words hung in the air between them, fully charged, and for a moment, Amanda thought she might've been too brazen, too assumptive, too hopeful. Olivia stared up at her, tears drying on her flushed cheeks, fingers tight around Amanda's hand. Amanda hardly breathed, listening to her pulse scream in her ears. She was terrified, yet relieved. She'd finally said what she'd been dying to say for weeks, ever since Olivia had admitted to her relationship with Elliot.
Olivia's uncertain gaze dropped from hers and Amanda swallowed hard, waiting for the moment of truth. She followed Olivia's line of sight down to her cellphone. She hadn't hung up the phone yet.
Slowly, Olivia lifted the phone to her ear.
"I...I've got to go." Her voice was raw and husky, but the words ignited hope in Amanda's chest.
When Olivia lowered the phone once more, she tapped the disconnect button and the device clattered to her desktop. Silence swelled and Amanda nearly spoke before Olivia's eyes lifted once more, tracking up Amanda's body until their gazes locked. Amanda's breath came quicker, and she felt perspiration lining their clenched fingers. She wanted to say something, utter some encouragement or coaxing word, but the words stayed lodged in her throat as Olivia stood from her chair.
Their bodies were scarcely an inch apart, and Olivia seemed to radiate an electrifying energy that compelled Amanda to remain close, dangling by a thread of desire and hope. She stared up at Olivia, but Olivia's eyes didn't meet hers. Instead, her heavy-lidded gaze was directed lower.
"Liv…" Amanda began to choke out.
At the sound of her name, Olivia seemed to break. Her eyes fluttered closed and she sank into Amanda's body. When their mouths met, a tide of arousal washed over Amanda's body, so strong and all-consuming that she nearly lost her footing. She grappled for balance against the desk and rode the wave to its peak. There, she found her strength, plunging her fingers into Olivia's hair at the nape of her neck. Surging into her, she parted her lips and urged Olivia to do the same with the tease of her tongue along the barrier of Olivia's teeth. She heard Olivia moan, and the vibration of her verbal desire radiated into her own throat. Then Olivia's jaw was lapsing beneath her ministrations and she was tasting her again, her saliva as sweet and heady as she remembered.
Amanda disentangled her hand from Olivia's and grabbed her by the hip. Spinning them around, she pushed Olivia against the desk and felt Olivia's knees part around her. Pressing between her legs, she squeezed her fingers in Olivia's hair, tilting her head back further with minimal prodding. Olivia complied easily to her directions, igniting even hotter flames of desire between Amanda's hips. Slanting her mouth along Olivia's, Amanda curled her tongue into Olivia's mouth, laving the roof of her mouth until she elicited another moan, then another, and another.
At last, Olivia's mouth broke from hers and she was panting, her hands trembling against Amanda's hips where her fingers were bunched around Amanda's shirt. She pressed her forehead against Amanda's, her eyelids fluttering shut.
"Are you okay?" Amanda whispered, her voice strangled with desire.
Olivia breathed heavily, but her fingers remained tight, holding Amanda close. Amanda smoothed her hand down Olivia's back, offering a gentler gesture as she prayed that Olivia would not come so far only to push her away again. She wanted more than she ever should have allowed herself to imagine, and she knew that she could give Olivia more than Olivia had ever thought possible if only she would let her.
Finally, Olivia's eyes opened, flicking upwards to meet Amanda's.
Her mouth trembled when she whispered, "Get me out of here."
Euphoria filled Amanda's chest, and she immediately felt a shaky smile on her lips.
"Come on." She replied, squeezing Olivia's hip. "We'll catch a cab."
Grabbing Olivia's hand once more, she reluctantly stepped back from the warmth of Olivia's body. Olivia's slipped off the desk without hesitation and grabbed her coat before following after her. Amanda knew she couldn't read Olivia's mind, but the look in her eyes was the same sort of relief that Amanda felt in her heart. They both wanted this, perhaps more than they'd allowed themselves to think and for reasons that Amanda didn't want to dwell on. Soon, none of it would matter.
Leading the way towards the elevator, Amanda relished the simple pleasure of Olivia's fingers laced in her own. There was so much tenderness to be had in this act, the one of holding hands with another woman. Even this took her breath away.
Olivia joined her inside the elevator, and Amanda pressed the button for the bottom floor. She turned back towards Olivia with a smile, ready to offer another reassurance, but as soon as the doors closed, Olivia pressed into her again. Amanda's heart rushed as Olivia's mouth connected with her own for the second time that night, and she grasped the back of Olivia's neck, taking every kiss that she was offered until she heard the ding of the elevator and the creak of the doors.
"Hold on." She whispered to Olivia though she was grudging to force them apart in any way.
Olivia glanced over at the doors as though she'd forgotten where they were through the haze of desire.
"Come on." Amanda whispered, pushing away from the wall of the elevator and grabbing her hand again.
Their pace was quick across the dark atrium to the exit, and Olivia's hand never left hers. Amanda shoved the door open and they broke out onto the sidewalk, but even the cool air could not touch the heat that had formed between them.
Reaching the edge of the sidewalk, Amanda glanced up and down the street, hoping to see a cabbie nearby. She would hate to have to call one and waste any more precious time. When she saw a yellow car approach, she breathed a quick prayer of thanks up to the heavens and stepped off the sidewalk to wave down the car.
"Amanda, wait." It was the first time Olivia had spoken since her plea to leave and her voice held a tremulous quality that caused fear to grip Amanda for a moment.
"What is it?" She asked, attempting to calm the tremble in her voice as she turned back towards her.
Olivia's brow was furrowed, but her hand remained tightly clenched around Amanda's.
"I… I don't want to go home." She whispered at last, her eyes finally meeting Amanda's.
"Where do you want to go…?" Amanda asked carefully, her voice breathless in anticipation and agonizing apprehension.
Out of the corner of her eye, she could see the cab pulling up to the curb.
Olivia hesitated, glancing down at their intertwined fingers. "Somewhere else."
Amanda swallowed the knot in her throat, glancing back at the cab.
"My place." She said at last, risking the chance that Olivia had changed her mind and she was only fooling herself; but she'd realized in the moment Olivia had kissed her that she would risk being a fool for the chance to be with her.
Olivia's gaze lifted to hers, holding another expression of relief that went beyond words.
"Okay." She whispered, and the simple admission lifted Amanda's swooning heart from the ground back up into the clouds.
"Okay." Amanda echoed, her heart pounding with renewed desire. "Wait here."
Turning towards the cab, she bent down to the open passenger side window and pulled out her wallet.
"I'll give you an extra ten to keep your eyes on the road." She told the cabbie, offering the bill between two fingers. "And only on the road."
The cabbie glanced at the bill then out the window at Olivia on the sidewalk.
"Fifteen?" He wagered.
"Whatever." Amanda slipped out a second bill and shoved it into his palm. "Just do you job, okay?"
"Yeah, yeah." He muttered, taking the money.
"Hey." Amanda ordered, pulling her coat lapel back to show the NYPD shield clipped to her blazer. "I'm doing you a favor here, buddy."
The cabbie's face straightened and folded the money into his pocket. "No problem, ma'am. Where can I take you on this lovely evening?"
Amanda flashed him a sarcastic smile and told him the address.
She certainly could have allowed them to take the cab ride half a seat apart, but at this point, she wasn't sure she could keep her hands to herself and she wasn't sure that Olivia could either. It was better to have insurance, and better still to nurse the flame between them until they could be alone. Silence and quiet left room for doubt and second thoughts, and she didn't think she could stand another week, furthermore another day of tension between them.
Straightening from the window, she grabbed the back door handle and turned towards Olivia. Offering her a smile, she held out her other hand towards. Olivia hesitated for only a moment before she joined Amanda beside the cab. Taking her hand, Olivia slipped into the cab ahead of her and Amanda climbed in after. Pulling the door shut, she sent a final glare towards the cabbie before glancing over at Olivia.
Olivia had slid over into the opposite seat, and Amanda spread her hand over the middle seat as the cab pulled away from the curb. Olivia met her gaze over the seat before she glimpsed Amanda's outstretched hand. Amanda slipped her hand a closer before patting the seat slowly. Olivia's lips parted and she quickly glanced at the driver before glancing back at Amanda.
"Come here." Amanda mouthed at her with a tilt of her head.
Olivia's throat bobbed, but she moved over slowly into the middle seat. Amanda slipped her arm around her waist and pulled her closer, nearly into her lap. Ducking her head she pressed her mouth against the slope of Olivia's neck and shoulder, kissing slowly. She felt Olivia's breath quicken, and she moved her mouth a bit higher. There, she could feel her pulse throbbing beneath thin layers of warm flesh.
Olivia's hand moved quickly to Amanda's thigh, squeezing tightly as the cab lurched beneath them.
Amanda's flicked her eyes towards the cabbie, but as promised, his eyes were on the road. Emboldened, she slipped her hand beneath Olivia's coat and skimmed the buttons of her shirt, playing with each one until she felt Olivia's fingernails biting into her leg. Sliding one button open and then another, she shifted fingers into the opening. Smooth, bare skin and the lace of her bra met Amanda's fingers and a throb of desire went through her. Despite all of her daydreams and desires, the real thing was so much better than she had ever dared to imagine. Sliding her hand deeper, she cupped the swell of Olivia's breast, squeezing slowly through the material of her bra.
Olivia's breath wavered, and when Amanda chanced a glance at her, her head was tilted back against the seat, her eyes and mouth squeezed shut. There was no hint of doubt or discomfort; only pleasure and arousal. Whatever excuses had been used to explain away their kiss outside the bar had been left in the squadroom, and now they were hurtling towards Amanda's apartment with no intentions other than to fulfill both of their desires. A tremble washed over Amanda's body and she pressed a kiss against Olivia's taut jaw before ducking to catch her earlobe. She sucked the soft flesh once before breathing warm air across the shell of Olivia's ear.
"I wanna fuck you so bad." She whispered in ear, and felt Olivia viscerally quake beneath her. "You don't even know what I want to do to you."
The confession had long remained behind her teeth, waiting at the back of her tongue, hiding in her eyes. Releasing it now felt like it's own singular pleasure despite the clear direction of their interaction leading to much more explicit things.
Olivia whimpered in return. Her fingers were squeezing the inside of Amanda's leg harshly, but her touch could only encourage the desire pulsing between Amanda's legs. She could already feel how wet her panties were and the tight seam of her jeans against her crotch felt like a terrible affliction. She shifted her legs further apart, allowing Olivia's hand to slide dangerously close.
Her body trembled, and she welcomed the ache of desire. It'd been so long since she'd felt so much. Her last relationship had long been dead and the nightmare of Atlanta was closer than any other sexual encounter. She longed to replace it now as she imagined that Olivia hoped to replace her fraught relationship with Elliot. Amanda would not fault Olivia if it were her only reason for coming with her. No, she wanted to be that for Olivia. She wanted it more than anything.
Squeezing Olivia's breast one last time, she arched her fingers higher and felt for the edge of the cup of the bra. Dipping her fingers beneath the silk and lace, she plunged her hand into the hot interior. She needed to touch naked flesh, needed to feel Olivia's body searching for completion just as much as her own was. To her satisfaction, Olivia's nipple swelled beneath her fingers, hardening immediately to her touch, and Amanda let it prod her palm for a moment before squeezing it between her fingers with enough pressure to twist a low moan from Olivia's mouth.
Olivia tossed her head, pressing her face into Amanda's hair as she grabbed Amanda's arm with a trembling grasp.
"Amanda…" She whispered huskily into her hair.
Amanda turned her head, and their noses pressed against one another before their exhales washed over the other's mouth. Their desire-ladden gazes met and Olivia moaned softly as though giving in all over again. She collapsed into Amanda once more, kissing her with a plea. She was already begging.
Amanda wished desperately that they were already inside her apartment so that she could strip off the barrier of cloth and stitching that stood between them and give Olivia everything she knew that she had been searching for, but they had to maintain some sort of protection from the world while they were in the cab.
Grabbing Olivia's thigh, she urged her closer, and Olivia clambered onto her lap without hesitation. With her back entirely blocking the cabbie's perspective - should be breaking his promise - Amanda felt bold enough to unbutton Olivia's shirt further. Their mouths broke apart and she gazed downwards, her heart threatening to break through her ribs as she gazed at Olivia's swollen breasts straining against the maroon material.
"Jesus." She whispered, lifting her hands to cup them both before she pressed her face into the warmth of her cleavage.
Olivia arms encircled her neck, holding her close as she slipped her hands around Olivia's body to find the clasp of the bra. Her trembling hands fumbled for only a moment before she managed to release the clasp. Olivia's breasts spilled from beneath the material, and she heard Olivia panting into her hair. When Amanda's palms closed around each breast, Olivia's flesh was soft and warm. She stroked her thumbs over her hardened nipples and her silken areolas, shuddering with arousal at each centimeter of flesh she could feel responding to her touch.
Pulling back, she cupped her hands beneath Olivia's breasts and lifted them for her to see in the sparse light of the street lamps that they passed. Her head felt dizzy with the motion of the car and the arousal pulsing through her veins, but she couldn't deny herself every pleasure of looking upon and touching Olivia's body.
"You're beautiful." She breathed.
Ducking in, she clasped her mouth to one nipple, and the fullness of Olivia's nipple filled her mouth with tantalizing hardness and sweetness, like a candy with a soft center.
Olivia's arms tightened around her, and her hips rocked against Amanda's thighs, searching for fulfillment in the friction of skin and material. If Olivia had harbored any doubts upon climbing into the cab, Amanda imagined they'd all been abandoned as she now desperately squirmed against her thigh. Eager to coddle Olivia's growing desire, Amanda let one hand fall from Olivia's breast to the swell of her ass, squeezing her circling buttock in order to pull her tightly against her hip.
She wished once more than they were alone so that the grinding of her hips might be skin-to-skin, yet this sweet torture of half-clothed, half-public foreplay was too arousing to deny. The closer they flew to her apartment the harder her body throbbed and the harder it was for Olivia to swallow her moans and cries.
Amanda briefly wondered if Elliot had ever offered Olivia teasing as arousing and alluring as this before banishing the thought of him. The way Olivia whimpered and squirmed against in her desperate pantomime informed Amanda that he had not.
Releasing Olivia's breast from her mouth, she switched to the opposite one, scraping her teeth along ridges of her tightened nipple for a moment before she sucked her into her mouth once more. Olivia pressed her mouth hard into her hair, her hips arching against Amanda's body as she experienced a wave of arousal strong enough to seize her momentarily. Amanda muffled a moan into Olivia's breast, and squeezed Olivia's ass harder before arching her fingers down the curve of her buttock. Her fingers dipped between Olivia's legs, and she felt heat radiating through her pants. Olivia gasped softly in her ear, her body still for a moment in frozen pleasure and shock as Amanda rubbed her fingers into the soft core of body.
"You like that?" Amanda murmured against her breast as she massaged in slow circles.
Olivia's head dropped against her shoulder while her fingers dug into Amanda's hair and the material of her shift. She couldn't reply, but Amanda already knew the answer.
Reaching up with her opposite hand, she grasped the back of Olivia's neck and pulled ear into alignment with her mouth.
"When I get you alone, I'm going to bend you over and fuck you like you deserve." She whispered huskily in her ear.
Olivia trembled in her grip, but her hips arched almost imperceptibly against Amanda's fingers, urging the torture to continue. Pleasure rushed through Amanda's body, stealing nearly all of her breath, but she ignored the urge to collapse into a puddle of arousal. She'd lead them thus far, and she wouldn't fail now, not when she was so close to giving Olivia everything she'd ever imagined and Olivia had ever desired.
She pressed her face to Olivia's neck, and she didn't stop until the slowing of the car and the familiar street beyond the window dragged her foggy brain from the haze of arousal. The streetlights shone bright upon their intertwined bodies and beyond towards their final destination. In minutes they'd be alone. After months of denial and misplaced anger, it would all be laid to rest at the foot of her own bed. It was all over, but just beginning.
"Hey, Liv…" She mumbling, squeezing her close. "We're almost there."