Authors Note: Still not owning anything. Enjoy. Drop a review they are what keeps me writing.
Growing Up
The screen flickered to life.
Thomas: How much do I enjoy visual puns? Well you wouldn't be-LEAF it! [crowd cheers] Thank you, thank you so much! [repeated]
Everyone started to laugh.
[theme music plays]
Thomas: What is up everybody? Oh man, so I just recently celebrated my BIRTHDAY! One more year older! Putting a stamp on another year of doing...whatever the heck I'm doing. I don't know. And how does it feel?
Patton: AMAZING!
Thomas: That's right, Morality!
Roman: Uhhh...
Logan: Uhhh...
Anxiety: Uhhh...
"Three of your sides agreeing like that. That can't be good" Terence said.
Thomas: Ugh, come on you guys, WHAT? Can't I get through one video without having some sort of...dilemma?
"No" Joan laughed.
"Shush you" Thomas blushed.
Anxiety: I'm not alone on this one? Nice.
Thomas: So thrilled to see you, Anxiety, working together with my logical side and my fanciful side. This is...really heartwarming.
Patton: It is! But I'm also confused!
Anxiety: Another year older and, yeah, you're here, but is "here" where you need to be?
Logan: Well, I don't think that's the dilemma. This is indeed his apartment.
Everyone laughed.
Anxiety: I mean―[grunts] Like, is he satisfied with where he is at this point in his life.
Logan: Ah, yes. That's where I was coming from.
Roman: I don't like it, but I too have to agree with Surly Temple here.
Anxiety: How many of those you got?
"Alot aparently" Logan stated.
Roman: Thomas, there is so much that you have dreamed of doing. Are we there yet? Nay.
Patton: Moo! Animal noises. Go!
Logan: Baaa―wait! This is not the time for word association games!
Everyone laughed.
Thomas: Okay. Well, yeah. There's still lots I have to accomplish.
Logan: Oh, lots indeed. There's your dreams, sure. But, there's also business responsibilities, social commitments, personal health responsibilities, groceries, hygiene-
Thomas: I get it.
Logan: Oh, those are just the categories. We haven't even gotten into specifics yet.
"Sheesh that's lot" muttered Anxiety putting his hood on.
Patton grabbed his hand and started rubbing his thumb to Anxiety's palm. Anxiety shot Patton a tired smile.
Thomas: Okay. Well, I still have time for all of that.
Roman: [tsks]
Anxiety: [scoffs]
Thomas: ...Right?
Patton: You sure do.
Anxiety: I don't know. Do you? That's what a birthday brings, sadly enough. The awareness of the passage of time. How far you've actually come. How little time you have left. I mean, who knows? Any day could be your last...
"Wow" muttered Thomas and his friends.
T: [groaning]
Patton: Stop! Stop. Now, I know we tend to overthink a couple things.
Logan: A couple?
Patton: But a birthday is...a birthday! Getting older should be celebrated!
"Exactly" Valerie grinned.
Thomas: I don't know, Morality. Maybe they're right? I mean, we've kinda had this talk before, but with getting older, I feel more and more... out of place.
Patton: What do you mean by that, kiddo?
Thomas: I don't know. I'm just―am I really doing what I should be doing?
Patton: Aw, well, look who needs another lesson in adultery!
Everyone started laughing.
Thomas: Ok, for the last time―THAT IS NOT RIGHT.
Patton: I'm sorry, look WHOM needs another lesson in adultery.
Thomas: Somehow worse.
Everyone somehow started laughing harder.
Roman: Now Thomas, you know I believe in you. ...But I get a little bit restless when I think about all the adventures yet to come. When comparing yourself to your friends and what they've accomplished, how do you stack up?
Patton: Like pancakes―a grand slam!
Anxiety: Like pancakes―you fall flat.
"Ooof. Thomas shouldn't be comparing hismelf to others. Everyone moves at their own speed and does things in there own order." Lilly said.
"True" Thomas smiled.
Thomas: Don't you dare turn breakfast food into a negative metaphor.
Logan: Some of your friends are getting married, some are pursuing higher education, and some are getting serious jobs, all for the betterment of their futures.
Thomas: Yeah...
Anxiety: So...what are YOU doing?
Thomas: I-I...
Patton: ANYTHING he darn well pleases! Look everyone, Thomas and I have already had the talk on learning new things to be more responsible, and he's doing that! Getting older is not a bad thing! Independence is a celebration! It's got "dance" right in the word.
Logan: N-No it doesn't.
Everyone laughed.
Patton: I mean, think of it! You no longer have any schoolteachers to tell you what to do.
Logan: Was this really a necessary visual?
Patton: Which means YOU choose what you want to read and what to learn!
Thomas: [screaming]
Anxiety jumped. His eyes widening and breathing becomong slightly harsher. Patton got off his chair and climbed into Anxiety's chair to snuggle with him.
Patton: You and your friends can be as loud as you want without getting in trouble.
Thomas: So yeah, that's probably what I would sound like if I was giving birth.
"What?" all of Thomas's friends said confused. Thomas also looked confused.
Patton: You always have the perfect group for group projects!
Thomas: We've finally done it... [dramatic music plays] VOLTRON SHIRT! AWAY―oh, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry!
Joan: Drop it, it's fine.
Thomas: Ok. Let's go!
[music stops] [abrupt ripping noise]
"Yeah that was always going to be a bad idea" Thomas laughed along with his friends and sides.
Patton: You're lucky enough to be able to work whenever you wanna work! And when you don't feel like working, you can stay up until 3 a.m. rewatching Parks & Recreation.
Thomas: [dopey laughter]
Roman: ...What were those scenarios?
Thomas: They were all real events, in my life. Except the 3 a.m. one. I usually stay up much later.
Patton: Well, yeah...
Logan: He cannot stay up until 3 a.m., or however late.
Thomas: It's like 5 a.m.
"Go to bed Thomas!" All of Thomas's friends called shocked at such a late time.
Thomas just blushed.
"Yeah I do have to work on that" Thomas stated embarrassed.
Logan: Oh my...
Roman: [gasps] Great Odin's eyepatch!
Anxiety: 5 a.m. The witching hour.
Logan: I could be wrong, but I believe that's midnight.
Anxiety: 5 a.m. The devil's hour.
Logan: Now I'm pretty sure that's 3 a.m.
Anxiety: Well, then it's just 5 a.m. and you need to go to bed.
Everyone laughed at the byplay betwwen the sides.
Logan: Exactly! He can't stay up rewatching Parks & Recreation every time he doesn't feel like working.
Patton: Why is that, Mr. Gloomy Gus Teacher?
Logan: Because...! [clears throat] ...he'll never get anything done.
Anxiety: Unless you want me to keep coming around to remind you of all the things you fail to do, in which case, keep it up.
T: [whimpers]
Everyones eyes widened.
Patton: He will do whatever he has to do at his own pace, and he can spend his down time however he wants. Adults get to make decisions independent of their parents, which means... See, Logic? I'm doing it too! You can eat whatever you want... You wear whatever you like... You're free to make fun, ill-advised decisions...
Thomas: I need you to hit me with your car for a video.
Joan: I've dreamed of this moment.
Thomas: You have?
Joan: Uh, no, let's go!
Thomas: Alright.
"I would never agree to that, like that, by the way" Joan said looking at Thomas.
"I know" Thomas said back.
Patton: You do chores whenever you feel like it... Play video games until your eyes are sore...AND no curfew! You can stay up until 3 a.m. rewatching Parks & Recreation. Oh, and if you ever need help from your parents, they're just a phone call away.
Roman: Did you ever wash that shirt? You're wearing it right now.
Thomas: I did not.
"Gross" Everyone including Thomas said.
Roman: Ewwww! Anxiety: Dude.
Thomas: Why did you have to show everyone that?
Patton: [shrugs]
Logan: That settles it. Morality, you are the issue here.
"Uh oh" Anxiety muttered seeing where this was going.
"What?" Thomas asked.
"Well by stating Pattons the problem Logan and Roman will probably try to work with you to supress Patton's influence to you. Making everyone job harder to do" Anxiety answered squeezing Patton's hand.
"Oh. Wait you said Logan and Roman will try to influence me to supress Patton more but what about you?" Thomas asked his anxious trait.
"I'll probably be very quiet about my opinion taking on a role of observation to see how this is affecting you and Patton" Anxiety answered.
"Oh"
Everyone sat there and thought about that for a moment before the screen started up again. Patton snuggled closer to Anxiety in comfort realising this episode may be hard on himself.
Patton: Oh, Logan. I love this playful teasing back and forth that we do!
Logan: No, I'm serious right now. And always have been. And forever will be. NECKTIE!
Roman: You are holding Thomas back!
Anxiety: His heart's just not in the right place.
Logan: Again, that is not the issue. Anatomically, Thomas is fine.
Everyone chuckled at that.
Anxiety: Why do you only take whatever I say literally?
Roman: I am always a proponent of following one's heart, BUT if it is not helping on the quest to fulfill one's longing, then what is the gosh-darn-ding-dang point?
Patton: Well...
Logan: Figures like parents or teachers were there to keep you accountable for your actions, Thomas, and without them, you lack the accountability system necessary to stay on track.
Thomas: Yeah...you're right.
"See Logan is influencing Thomas alot more" Anxiety said.
Patton: But, kiddo...
Thomas: That's just it! I am not a "kiddo" anymore! It's time I start acting like it.
Patton: I'm sorry, does... "adulto" work?
Thomas: How about "Mr. Sanders"?
Logan: I like it, very professional.
Thomas: Yes. Yes, it is.
Patton: But that's not fun...
Roman: Well, let's face it, Morality. Things can't always be fun if we're trying to get where we want to go. We need actual contributions from you every now and then.
Logan: You stand there, making your... puns, and are just needlessly... silly. All the time.
Roman: Perhaps it's best you just stick to knowing the difference between right and wrong, and leaving the rest to us.
"See I have already taken a step back from this discussion slightly to observe. I saw how that affected Patton now I will try to come up with a plan to help him while both still contributing to the conversation and making look like am not" Anxiety nodded to himself.
Everyone else was just amazed at the thought process behind some of Anxiety's actions.
Thomas: Now, what else should I do to properly grow up?
Logan: Well, let's re-examine your habits and see where we can make some improvements. You can't stay up until 3 or 5 - a.m. every night. Your current sleep schedule is unhealthy. You should be in bed at precisely 10 p.m.
Roman: You need to eat healthy in order to maintain beauty! And to, you know, be healthy. That's important too. No sweets or guilty pleasures. Only broccoli, brussels sprouts, carrots-
"How about doing everything in moderation" Talyn said worried about the extreme changes the two sides were trying to make in their friend.
Thomas: Ca-uh, carrots?
Roman: YES, carrots. And beef, pork, chicken, mmm...
Anxiety: No Mulan lyrics right now, man. Come on.
"Subtley pointing out that your plan wouldn't allow you to watch children's disney movies" Anxiety said.
Roman: So be it. [drum beat plays] Greens, greens, nothing but greens...
Anxiety: Into the Woods is not better!
Logan: You can read whatever you want, but you don't. So, maybe start looking into reading for entertainment instead of what you normally do. In fact, let's just cut out Parks & Recreation altogether.
Patton: Ahh...!
Logan: He's already seen it.
Roman: You need to do chores as soon as you are able to. That means wash your filthy shirt, you heathen!
Logan: While a decision can be fun, it can also be...stupid, and should thus be avoided.
Joan: Hey, Darude Sanderstorm! There's a bouncy castle out back! You wanna come? It's pretty lit.
Thomas: No, I would not like to bounce in a bouncy castle. I could trip and injure myself.
Joan: Hm, a fair point. Your logical decision-making truly is a positive influence on your companions.
Thomas: Let us instead start a book club.
Joan: Yes!
Anxiety: Wow. Who's the fanciful one here?
Logan: It's Roman.
Anxiety: OK, Pocket Protector.
"That wouldn't happen. I would needle Thomas to find out whats wrong before teasing him until he relented" Joan laughed.
Logan: And you don't need to call your parents, ever.
Patton: WHAT!?
"What about to tell them you love them, or arrange catch ups" Valerie stated.
Roman: You are an adult! You can manage everything yourself!
Anxiety: They never understood you anyway.
"Subtley pointing out how much you are acting like a teenager right now" Anxiety smirked.
Patton: Okay, this is getting a little bit...extreme.
Logan: Sure, some of these scenarios may not be verisimilitudinous, but...
Thomas: Try again.
Logan: Sure, some of these scenarios may not seem realistic, but in time―with effort―it can become a reality.
Roman: And it will make dream-chasing all the more possible!
Logan: Of course, you can't just wear anything you want.
Thomas: This smelly shirt's not cutting it?
Roman: No.
Anxiety: You need all dark clothing...
Logan: No ... You're a serious adult, and you need to dress like one. You'll wear a belt, tuck your shirt in, and you'll wear...a necktie.
Patton: [gasps] Not the necktie!
Everyone chuckled at that.
[dramatic music plays]
[music stops abruptly]
Thomas: Good?
Patton: Noooo!
Roman: I'm not sure if this outfit fits you.
Thomas: Wha- is the shirt too tight?
Roman: No, too square.
Thomas: Okay.
Anxiety: You are the man.
Thomas: Oh, well, that's kind of you, Anxiety-
Anxiety: No, you look like The Man. I fight The Man. I wanna fight you now.
Thomas: Whoa, whoa...
Logan: This...this is just my look. You stole my look.
Thomas: What are you-!? You TOLD me to dress this way!
Logan: Well, I didn't think we would look so similar. Plus, I wear it so much better than you, objectively.
Thomas: What are you talking about? We have the same face!
Logan: Ah, but you aren't peering through a *styling* pair of Warby Parkers.
Everyone laughed.
Patton: Thomas, you...don't look like yourself.
Thomas: That's "Mr. Sanders," and this is who I am now.
Anxiety: Is no one going to acknowledge that he just dabbed?
Everyone laughed at Anxiety's observation.
Patton: But you're giving up all the things that you love!
Thomas: I can't keep going moment to moment doing whatever I want, because I'm not getting what I want long-term. Nobody wants to work...but we have to. Doing exactly what I want all the time, i-it's leading to a very unproductive lifestyle.
Patton: But...
Thomas: I'm doing this for both of us! This is the only way to achieve my goals. Once I have everything I want...then we'll both be happy.
Logan: That's right- wait, what do you mean? Is this new lifestyle not filling you with enjoyment?
Thomas: No, but it will...eventually...hopefully...
Logan: I...I don't...think we have this...quite right. Morality? What are we doing...wrong?
Patton: Well...I do think you're trying to do what's right... ...but life shouldn't be lived without enjoying the simple pleasures from time to time! Goals are great, but...life is short! Might as well make it short and fantastic! Like Danny DeVito...
Everyone chuckled.
Thomas: Wait a minute... yeah. If I'm not happy doing what I'm doing...is it worth it?
Roman: If you're not enjoying it, it would be very hard for me to gain inspiration and do my job.
Anxiety: It would give me more work to do, and I do not like to work hard.
Thomas: I can't sacrifice everything you bring to the table! The things that I love, the things that make me feel good, the things that make me laugh... ...the things that make life worth it! Just to work towards...something, I don't even know what- to try to fit in with what I think others are doing at my age...
Logan: I do... believe that you are right. But now we're back where we started!
"Not really" Lilly stated.
Thomas: Not necessarily. I can't go moment to moment listening to everything you want me to do. I really do need a more consistent schedule in order to stay healthy and productive. BUT, I will always make time for the things that I enjoy, and any time I'm feeling overwhelmed, or just need a break...I know who to turn to.
Patton: Danny DeVito.
Thomas: Well, you're not wrong about that, but I meant you.
Patton: [gasps] Awwww!
Everyone chuckled.
Thomas: So, OFF with this tie!
Logan: Careful with it, careful!
Thomas: And come to think of it, we need to keep in mind how much Morality contributes? He's the reason I started making videos in the first place, and see what dreams were accomplished from that?
Roman: That is... Wow, I am ashamed of myself!
Logan: I do not like being wrong.
"It's ok to be wrong sometimes, you just need to learn from mistakes and try not to repeat them" Thomas said to his logical side.
Anxiety: I was gonna bring that up...but it would have been too much work.
Patton: Well, sometimes I lead you in the right direction. Oh! Mr. Sanders?
Thomas: We're back to Thomas. That name was never gonna stick.
Patton: Thomas! I do think I have something in mind to help keep the balance between productive and fun. Something that makes you feel a little bit more mature, but still keeping the spirit of your inner child alive.
Thomas: Love it, love it!
Patton: This is your apartment, your personal space, and the place where you just like to have your down time. Well, how about you construct a cozy little Mind Palace to help you regain balance, work things out, and get things done whenever you need to?
Thomas: That...could work.
Patton: Roman, you mind lending a hand?
Roman: I like where you're going with this! Mind Palace, ho~!
Thomas: Whoa.
Logan: It's a little too, um...basic.
Patton: Yeah.
Anxiety: My eyes!
"Way to bright" Anxiety muttered.
Everyone laughed.
Roman: Sorry, I seem to have drawn a blank for a second. Let me try again.
Thomas: That's...better.
Roman: Ah, perfection! I am too good.
Logan: This...is... ...adequate.
Patton: Yeah, we each got our own little handy nooks! Even made one for you, Anxiety.
Anxiety: Thanks for noticing me.
Thomas: Morality, amazing idea! I love this.
Roman: Um, excuse me―I did the hard labor.
Thomas: Oh, you're right. Thank you.
Roman: But also: yes, good work Morality.
Anxiety: Small, dark and empty, like the cavity where my heart would be... if I had one.
Patton made some concerned noises clutching Anxiety to him.
Logan: Yes, I suppose you did provide a suitable upgrade from our previous setting.
Patton: Now we're in the perfect space to work out our issues! So, let's hear it! Who wants to go first?
Roman: I think we got it all figured out.
Logan: Yeah, I'm done.
Anxiety: Happy birthday.
Thomas: Oh, thank you.
"At least one side wished Thomas a happy birthday" Terence smiled.
Patton: Uh, okay, alright, cool, see you guys later.
Thomas: Uh, before you go, I... do want to let you know how grateful I am that no matter how old I've gotten, you've still been such a huge part of my life, Morality.
Patton: D'awwww, you're gonna make me all emotional! I'm glad we could come to a compromise. Like adults! How about a good old game of Patton-cake to celebrate?
"Another name down onscreen" Thomas smiled.
Anxiety who realised that his would probably be next decided to annunce his later.
Thomas: ...You mean patty cake.
Patton: Well, it's like patty cake, but this version is named after me.
Thomas: Oh my gosh! Your name is Pattoncake!
Everyone laughed at onscreen Thomas including offscreen Thomas.
Patton: Y- No, it's just Patton.
Thomas: Yeah, that makes more sense. Wow!
Patton: Tell you what, you let that sink in, and I will sink out...to get the tuna fish. It's required for Patton-cake.
"Um what?" asked Valerie.
Thomas: Oh. Okay. Well, as I stand here scared for what that's going to be like, let me just close by saying growing older is something you should never be scared of. It will bring new responsibilities, but those responsibilities don't necessarily mean sacrificing the things that have always brought a smile to your face. Don't abandon that inner child. Pursue the things you're passionate about because, by doing so, you may be growing older, but you don't have to completely grow up. Until next time, take it easy, guys, gals, and non-binary pals! PEACE OUT! Before we go to the end card, I want to note that recently I was given the honor of receiving the Shorty Award for Best YouTube Comedian,
"Oh my god that is so cool" Thomas smiled really excited for that.
Thomas's friends and sides were all proud of Thomas.
Thomas: and I want to thank all of you out there for... your continual support and all who voted for me. I'm just blown away and overwhelmed by all the support. It just... it really encourages me to keep going with these videos, and, uh... I'm having fun with them, and I just... I can't wait to see what comes next, so thank you all so much, I love you. Yeah, and I just hope that I can keep making you smile!
"That was an interesting video" Thomas said glancing around.
"Yeah shhhhh, Endcard" Talyn smirked.
Everyone laughed.
Patton: Okay, I got the tuna fish! Logan, you have the two tennis rackets?
Logan: Yes, for some reason...?
Patton: And Roman, you've dipped all your fingers in candle wax?
Roman: Yes, it was very hot!
Patton: And Anxiety, you...
Anxiety: No, I didn't. Whatever you asked me to do, I didn't do it.
Patton: ...are standing there sulking in a corner, yes! Look at what a good job he's doing, everyone! Alright, we're all set! Now, get ready, because on this ride, you will get wet.
Logan: What!?
Roman: WHAT ARE WE DOING?!
Everyone was rolling around laughing at the sides reaction to whatever Patton-cake was.
After about fifteen minutes everyone had calmed down alot.
"Alright lunch time" Thomas said.
Everyone moved into the kitchen to look at what they could have for lunch.