Ichigo was very surprised when he stepped in the front door of his home and did not immediately have to deflect a fist to the face or a kick to the chest, but that surprise blew up by about a thousand percent when he found his entire family seated in the living room talking to a perfectly normal and respectable-looking young man who just happened to be Shiba Kaien.
He froze, completely unable to find any way to respond to a shinigami in his living room. It was worse than when Rukia had shown up at school. This was his family. Had the shinigami messed with their brains like they had his classmates? Who did they think Kaien was?
"I can't believe you went and stayed with Dad's family and you didn't even tell us!" Karin said, turning to glare at Ichigo. Then she turned back to their father. "And I can't believe you didn't tell us you had any family! Here we've been living like orphans all this time and you have a family?!?"
It isn't entirely Isshin-san's fault," Kaien said. "He chose to follow his own path, to marry your mother and become a doctor, rather than to stay at home and run the family--business. I'm afraid most of the family still considers him dead. It's too bad. Even when Ichigo was staying with us, there were many who did not want to accept him as family. I feel bad about that. I think it must have been an uncomfortable visit for Ichigo."
Ichigo continued to stare. How was it that Kaien could talk about the Great Shiba House like it was any family, and Ichigo's experience in Seireitei like it had been a normal summer vacation?
"What was it like?" Yuzu asked turning her huge eyes on her brother. "Did you meet a lot of our cousins? What about our grandparents?"
"They died a long time ago," Ichigo answered, his eyes shifting to his father. Ichigo'd been told his grandmother had only passed away a year or two earlier--after his father had left Soul Society, but Isshin showed no sign that the news meant anything to him. Then again, Urahara could probably have told him when his mother passed. Urahara did seem to know pretty much everything that was going on in Soul Society despite not having been there in a century. "But there were a lot of other people." The nobles of the Shiba family had generally ignored him and the other Ryoka when they happened to run into each other on the expansive Shiba Estate. "It was really traditional. The main house was really old and beautiful, and there was no western furniture at all. They only eat Japanese food--except whenever this crazy little girl with pink hair would show up, and then Miyako-san, that's Kaien-san's wife, would suddenly pull out a box of cookies, and the girl would eat them all in like five seconds flat."
"Pink hair?" Karin repeated skeptically.
"That would be Yachiru. She's a--neighbor of ours. I'm afraid her--father spoils her, but then we do too. Can't seem to help it. I think pretty much everyone gives Yachiru exactly what she wants."
Isshin smiled suddenly. "Did you get to meet Kenpachi, Ichigo?" he asked.
Ichigo paled, and his father laughed. "Now there's someone who can toughen you up."
"If he doesn't kill me," Ichigo said, wondering how much of the rest of his life he was going to have to spend running from the Captain of the Eleventh.
"I heard you won," Kaien said.
"He wants a rematch," Ichigo explained, and Kaien nodded.
"You got in a fight while you were visiting our family?" Karin demanded. "No wonder they don't want anything to do with us. They probably think we're all crazy like you and Dad."
"I didn't start it!" Ichigo protested.
"I'm afraid we're pretty much all into fighting back home," Kaien said. "It's where your dad gets it."
"You fight?" Karin said, looking at Kaien doubtfully.
Ichigo could see why she was doubtful. Kaien, of all the shinigami, was probably the most normal-looking. He didn't have the tattoos both Hisagi and Renji sported, and unlike most of the nobles his hair was short. He wasn't even particularly muscular, at least not so that you'd notice. Ichigo did have to appreciate that; at least they hadn't sent one of the showier lieutenants or a captain! He could just imagine Kenpachi walking down the road in Karakura; even if he was wearing normal clothes everyone would stare.
"I am considered very skilled in kendo," Kaien said with a smile. "And so is my wife, Miyako. In fact, we met in a kendo class in school."
"You were highschool sweethearts?" Yuzu said. "How romantic!"
"I don't think Ichigo's figured out girls exist," Karin said.
"Like I'd tell you," Ichigo snapped back.
"Ah, Miya-chan!" Isshin said, suddenly lost in reminiscence. "She was such a good girl, not like my Rangiku-chan; she was trouble, but they were both such cute girls!"
"Rangiku-san is not cute!" Ichigo couldn't help protest.
"Not cute! Are you blind? Rangiku is the epitome of feminine charm and--" Isshin broke off, his expression changing suddenly. "She didn't get fat, did she? It's Ichimaru's fault, three babies and driving my poor Rangiku-chan to drink. No wonder--"
"She's not fat," Ichigo interrupted. "She's just--she's--" he was at a loss to describe Rangiku. The woman was overwhelming at the very least, both her appearance and the emotion she had poured out on learning he was Isshin's son. "You should have told her you were ok, sent her a letter or something. She thought--"
Ichigo shook his head. He'd met lots of captains and their lieutenants. He couldn't think of one lieutenant who wouldn't have been devastated by the loss of their captain--maybe Omaeda, but he was sure it must have been awful for Rangiku. He had no idea why his father had done what he did, but there had better have been a really good reason.
"Who's Rangiku-san?" Karin demanded, glaring at her father. "You didn't leave some poor girl behind when you came to Karakura, did you?"
"You always said Mom was the only woman you ever loved," Yuzu put in.
"You've got it all wrong!" Isshin protested. "Rangiku-chan was my--my assistant, my happily married assistant, thank you very much! Even if that husband of hers was a nasty piece if work."
"You had an assistant?" Karin said, looking doubtful. "What did you do?"
Isshin looked frantically from Ichigo to Kaien, at a loss to think of some profession other than Captain of the Tenth Division of the Gotei 13.
"He was the general manager of the family business, or he was supposed to be, before he took off and left it for the rest of us to deal with," Kaien said.
"The family business? What's that?" Karin asked.
"Girls!" Isshin interrupted. "Look at the time! Shouldn't you be working on dinner? We have to serve our guest something special!"
His declaration got rid of Yuzu but Karin wasn't so easy. She was looking at Kaien with very sharp eyes after her sister left the room.
"Who are you really?" she demanded.
"I am really the son of your father's cousin," Kaien answered, smiling at her skepticism.
"No, you're not. You feel different, like Ichi-nii," Karin said. "You're one of them, aren't you?"
"Them?" Kaien asked, trying to look innocent.
"She knows about shinigami, Kaien-san," Ichigo said.
"But not about you?" Kaien said, turning toward Isshin.
"You leave my girls out of this. Ichigo, what sort of a big brother are you, letting Karin find out about the shinigami? You're supposed to protect your sisters! That stuff is far too dangerous for them!"
"Shut up, Dad," Karin said. "I want to know what's going on."
"So do I," Ichigo agreed. "Kaien-san, why did Soul Society send a lieutenant to Karakura?"
"It's just a precaution. I'm supposed to keep an eye on things in case Aizen decides to send something your way. Ichimaru thinks he will, but I doubt anything's going to happen. Ichimaru's gotten pretty jumpy since the Arrancar visited Rangiku."
"Wait a second," Karin said. "If you're a shinigami and Ichi-nii is a substitute shinigami and you and Dad both know this Rangiku, then if Dad really is your cousin--how could you not tell us you're a shinigami?"
Isshin flinched back at the anger Karin directed at him. "Karin-chan, that was all a long time ago, and--"
"What does that make us? Are we even human?"
"Of course you're--"
"Did Mom know? Did you lie to her too?"
"I would never--"
"I can't believe you would lie about something so important! Were you ever going to tell us?"
"Karin-chan, I--"
"Don't you 'Karin-chan' me! You're a big, fat lying liar! I don't even know who you are! Is Kurosaki Isshin even your name?"
"Actually it's--"
"More lies! You're a terrible person, did you know that? You lied to your own children! About who we are! We don't even know what we are!"
Ichigo and Kaien slowly inched their way out of the room as Karin continued to tell her father off.
"Are you staying here?" Ichigo asked as they stepped outside.
"Isn't that what family is for?" Kaien answered.