Renji sat silently watching as Toshiro attempted to argue with Zaraki Kenpachi. Coordinating defense strategies was probably an exercise in futility anyway, but trying to coordinate with the Eleventh was a joke. His captain had been wise to skip out.
"Having you and your officers race to the strongest available enemies is not a strategy!" Toshiro insisted loudly.
"Why not?" Kenpachi wanted to know. Behind him, Ikkaku was nodding in agreement, and Yachiru, having gotten bored, was trying to convince Yumichika to let her braid his hair.
"These are supposed to be full-division, multilayered, coordinated defense strategies," Toshiro said, rubbing his head in frustration. "In any case you can't be everywhere at once. What if the enemy has multiple strong members?"
"Suppose you and Kuchiki can have the extras," Kenpachi said with a shrug. "You got them big ice walls. You can at least hold 'em off till we get done with the first ones."
Toshiro groaned loudly, and Renji was pretty sure his mother would not have approved of what he was about to tell Kenpachi when a pair of black butterflies fluttered down to the captains.
"An emergency captains meeting," Toshiro said after a second. "Looks like our joint exercise is cancelled." He didn't manage to sound even slightly disappointed.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Another emergency meeting, Gin really thought they were overusing the term. When you had an emergency meeting everyday surely it wasn't an emergency anymore. It was really almost a regularly scheduled meeting for discussing all the new problems for the day.
He certainly didn't see any reason to hurry in promptly on time. They'd assigned him to Kurotsuchi's mad mission to find an Arrancar to play with when he'd accidentally showed up on time for the meeting the day before, proving conclusively that on time was a bad idea.
He was walking back and forth through the nearby halls of the First looking for some sort of trouble to get into as the meeting's starting time approached.
"Finally," he heard Kurotsuchi exclaim and stopped abruptly. Kurotsuchi was always good for a little trouble. "I knew you couldn't hide forever!"
He would listen in for a bit. He hoped the mad scientist was up to no good. He was a little disappointed when he heard Ukitake respond, but at least he sounded less than pleased to have run into Kurotsuchi.
"I have not been hiding," the older captain said. "I'm sorry I have been too ill to see you, but from what Nemu tells me you have nothing to discuss with me in any case."
Gin raised an eyebrow quizzically. The two captains had stopped just before the turn in the walk. They were out of sight, but he could hear them clearly. The freak sounded seriously put out, almost as annoyed as he'd been when he'd realized all of his experiments were going to be getting oversight, and Ukitake sounded at least equally upset, how odd.
"Nothing to discuss? You render my lieutenant useless, and you think there is nothing to discuss?" Kurotsuchi demanded in that shrill, obnoxious tone that even managed to make Gin's skin crawl. "Nemu is my lieutenant. She is necessary to the operation of my division. You have done enough damage with your bleeding-heart ethics, insisting that dozens of troublesome and pointless regulations be enforced, and teaching Nemu your bizarre moral code. I will not allow you to interfere further!"
"I do not consider this to have anything to do with your division," Ukitake answered. "If you wish to speak to me as Nemu's father out of a concern for her health and wellbeing I am, of course, glad to listen, but if you wish to speak as her captain then I must tell you to kindly mind your own business."
It was too bad he started coughing at that moment because Gin was finding it more than a little entertaining, hearing the soft spoken captain tell off the freak. He was hoping Kurotsuchi would keep pushing him because he really did want to know what Ukitake would do if he was pushed too far. Everyone had a line, and it was important to know what they would do when they hit it.
He'd spent years studying all the captains and various other senior officers who might be dangerous, figuring out what might set them off and what they might do, and more importantly how to not end up dead if their anger was ever directed at him, but Ukitake, as far as he'd ever been able to tell, simply could not be pushed to violence. He supposed centuries playing the peacemaker among a crowd of hotheaded captains had helped Ukitake to forge his already even-tempered personality into one of near godlike patience and calm--but surely, if anything was going to make him lose it...
Gin grinned hugely. If Kurotsuchi had had any kind of control of his wife the mad captain would have died years ago, in laboratory accident or some such, but Ukitake had actually managed to forge something of a familial relationship with the man, but this, maybe this would finally be the last straw.
"To think she almost convinced me to begin work on a treatment for you," Kurotsuchi said the moment Ukitake's coughs quieted. "I should have started on a better poison. I will clearly have no peace until you're gone. You simply will not cease your meddling. But this time you have gone too far! Sabotaging another captain's lieutenant! I will take this to Yamamoto, and we will see what he thinks. It's not too late to undo if he--"
"What, exactly, are you suggesting?" And there it was, the tone Gin had been waiting for; that was real anger, still suppressed, but not for much longer if Kurotsuchi didn't take the hint and shut up.
Gin moved silently to the corner and peaked ever so carefully around the wall. Ukitake was bent and leaning against the wall; there was blood on the handkerchief in his hand and splattered over one white sleeve. Physically, he looked quite weak, and Kurotsuchi was looming over him with his freakish face paint and costume to make up for the fact that he was actually quite a bit smaller than the other man.
"It's nothing but a bundle of cells at this point, easily disposed of," Kurotsuchi said. He must have been oblivious to the fact that, although Ukitake did not move, his reiatsu was rapidly increasing, because he just kept talking, and even Gin, at that point, would have taken the hint and shut up. "But, because that idiot girl wants to keep you happy more than she wants to fulfill the purpose for which she was created, she's refused! It's absurd! Why should she keep it? It's the worst possible timing, and she knows it. She's told me she had no intention to become pregnant. She claims it was accidental, which is nonsense. Nemu is not the bimbo from the Tenth. She does not make mistakes. The only possible explanation is that you purposefully negated the kido. You do not want her involved in the fighting to come so you impregnated her!"
Gin let out a laugh. It had very suddenly occurred to him what had happened, and he covered his mouth a second too late. Both captains turned the instant he laughed, and were looking at him with very unfriendly expressions. He'd noticed that before about people, they didn't like to be eavesdropped on.
He stepped out from behind the wall to join them. "I don't suppose you've got anything new in your private quarters, made of stone perhaps?" he suggested with a very friendly smile if he did say so himself.
Ukitake's eyes narrowed. "What are you talking about, Gin-kun? What could the decor have to do with anything?"
Gin was not happy with the way the other captain's reiatsu still hadn't calmed. Whether Ukitake could be driven to violence was not an experiment he'd wanted to take part in personally. "Didn't hear about Ran's little mistake with the sekiseki? Also known as Yukiko? Enough exposure to that stuff and all your kido go and fall apart."
"Nemu would have the sense to redo her kido after coming in contact with sekiseki; she's not a complete fool," Kurotsuchi snapped.
"Not if she didn't know it was there," Gin said. "You see I may have suggested as much to Aizen, as a joke, after Ran got knocked up. He really hated to see you two getting along so well. Or at all, really--he's not much for cooperation." He turned to Ukitake. "It's why I've been poisoning you for the past few years."
"You've been poisoning Captain Ukitake?" Kurotsuchi demanded, sounding almost gleeful at the idea.
"It was your poison," Gin protested.
"Which one?" Kurotsuchi demanded.
"M-36-K229-43 or was it 44?" Gin answered, frowning slightly. He'd taken both and couldn't quite remember which one he'd settled on.
Kurotsuchi turned thoughtful eyes on Ukitake. "Probably 44," he said. "43 does liver damage after long term exposure, but I see no signs of that."
Gin turned to Ukitake. "Kyoraku did pass on my message about throwing out all of Nemu's toiletries?"
Ukitake sighed and rubbed one hand over his face. "Yes, but I do wish, if you had to poison me, you could have used some other method to administer it."
"She didn't think she was making you worse, did she?" Gin asked.
"I assume that was the idea. It seems Aizen delights in causing such pain," Ukitake said slowly. "And now you're telling me that this child she has conceived is yet another plot by Aizen for no other purpose than to drive a wedge between me and Kurotsuchi?"
"Just a guess. If you find a piece of sekiseki in your room that'd pretty well confirm it. You'll need to figure out who put it there. I hate to think how many minions he could have running around Seireitei, just waiting for the chance to cause trouble. We're not going to have much of a Gotei left if we don't manage to stop them soon."
"Well, we will not let his plan succeed, of course," Kurotsuchi said. "Nemu will terminate this pregnancy, and we will move on without any hindrance whatsoever. I'm sure Aizen will be quite disappointed."
"Nemu has wanted a child for years, and she has been delayed over and over again because of my illness or some inconvenience to you. This accident or whatever it is has granted her wish and nothing less than the gods themselves will take it from her."
"And that's why I thought it was such a brilliant idea," Gin said, grinning hugely. "You two have been one good push away from killing each other since the day Ran-chan set Ukitake and Nemu up. I'm honestly not sure if even knowing it's what Aizen wants you can avoid it."
"Don't be absurd," Kurotsuchi snapped back. "We are quite capable of settling a disagreement without resorting to violence. We will simply put aside all foolish emotions and discuss the thing rationally—however that will have to come after this meeting as we are already late."
He turned and strode away, his strange air of dignity and conceit not at all affected by the harsh words of only moments ago.
Gin was not at all surprised to see Ukitake did not appear to agree with Kurotsuchi's dismissive attitude. The unfamiliar anger was still easy to read in his eyes.
"I've worked out seven different ways to murder him, if you're interested," Gin offered. He did owe Ukitake for helping Shiro out, after all, and it wouldn't be much of a chore, really, taking out the scientist.
Ukitake smiled then, his usual slow, gentle smile. "No, Gin-kun, I'm sure it wouldn't be right to murder my child's grandfather."
Gin sighed. Of course Ukitake would never consider violence. The man was a saint. He'd been a captain for centuries and had probably never killed anything that wasn't already a hollow.
"And, if it becomes necessary, I assure you I can handle him on my own," Ukitake added, gazing down the hall after Kurotsuchi with a very cold expression.
Gin frowned at the frail captain, wondering if that might actually be the case. How strong, exactly, did you have to be to keep yourself alive in the face of a fatal illness? And then to still have enough strength remaining not only to earn the position of captain but to hold onto it for centuries. Most captains had a pretty short shelf life. Lasting over a single century was pretty impressive. More than two was limited to four: Yamamoto, Unohana, Kyoraku, and Ukitake. He'd heard rumors Ukitake's reiatsu was absolutely beyond comparison, even to most captains, and all things considered, that probably was the case. He couldn't have lasted otherwise, not even with Kyoraku looking after him. He had to be able to hold his own.
He was startled when Ukitake suddenly smiled at him and patted him on the shoulder. "I do appreciate the offer, though. It's very kind of you."