Revisited the 25th of May 2020
Chapter 6: I will stand here and burn in my skin
The following chapter will contain some graphic descriptions of violence.
The flames engulfed his body. He felt them catching onto his arm, and then onto his leg, pinning him down to the floor. The pain was excruciating and would not let go of him.
«Mom!» he yelled, voice shattering into a million little pieces, the thick, black fog forcing his throat shut.
Where was she?
«Help me! Mom, where are you?» Still nothing.
Edward turned his head to look around the room. Alphonse, he remembered. Where was Alphonse?
Fueled by the thought of his helpless baby brother, he forced himself to break through the chains of fire. Getting back to his feet, he saw the roaring flames, launching spitballs of fire through the room. The sight of the ominous stonebuilt fireside, previously associated with cozy and warm evenings spent with his family, made him paralyzed with fear. It had large blazing teeth, eating away at anything that came too close. It grabbed a hold of his right arm and Ed screamed from agony and panic.
Wicked laughter roared from the blazing beast before Ed finally was finally able to break free of its searing barbs.
He gasped as he realized it had chewed his arm off. A warm liquid started to dribble from his eyes, and he grasped at where his arm was supposed to be.
«Nononono,» Ed cried and looked up with tearful orbs at the monster that was eating his body.
Devouring his family- his entire life.
Ed's eyes shut open widely, when he saw what it had started to gorge on next. Inside of the flaming gap of fangs, he saw his mother, embracing his infant brother tightly to her chest. Her face looked twisted in the bright light, as the flames tore at her clothes, pulling her down to her knees.
She screamed.
«M-mom! Get out of there!» Ed shouted as loud as his small lungs could muster. «Let go of them!»
Ed ran towards them but stopped dead in his tracks when his mother's skin started to melt off of her skeleton. His brother bawled his little heart out, and the sound broke Edwards's heart and made him sick with guilt. Two illuminating arms spread out from the gap and grabbed onto Alphonse, forcing the toddler from the embrace of his mother. Her hazel eyes grey and kept widening until they were unnaturally big, her skin peeling off her face and bones appearing as blood burst from underneath the burnt flesh. Her mouth gaped, jaw unhinged as a high pitch howl escaped her body, and uncontrolled hysteric sobs made her body convulse while grasping for her baby. Melting arms tried to reach for her young son as Ed stood and watched in terror. His tears had frozen in his eyes, despite the high temperature and he couldn't move.
"M-mom?" he finally managed to pipe, as his mom's dissolving body turned to look at him. That was when her eyeballs dropped out of her skull.
"What have you done?" His mother's voice sounded like it had dropped an octave as it roared dangerously at him.
"Mom-"
"You devil child!"
"Please!"
"You evil, good for nothing-"
"I'm sorry."
"Just like your father! You destroy everything you touch."
The fireplace got the hold of his leg.
He cried.
His mother's body withered before him, her bones poking out of her body.
"Poisonous..."
"Mom... It hurts!"
"Little piece of shit."
Ed startled awake, gasping for air with tears sprung from his eyes.
Every night.
He wiped some sweat on the edge of his duvet, catching his breath while covering his face. It's all my fault. I deserved everything- Every single little thing. He hid his face in the blanket, wanting to wait until his tears stopped running, when he heard the heavy snores.
Sounds like at least someone is getting a good night's sleep, he thought, but felt as if they sounded too close to be coming from a different room.
Wait.
He peeped over his duvet.
Roy was draped, fast asleep, over his bed while still seated on a chair pulled close.
"You old perve-" Ed thought, but quickly realized he had probably cried out in his sleep again. His pillows were placed on the foot-end of the bed, where he knew they probably weren't when he had been put to bed.
So, Roy must have checked in on him.
Ed felt embarrassed, but could not deny feeling some warmth in his chest by the gesture. Then, it turned into guilt. He had worried Roy, and been an inconvenience. Disrupting the man's sleep. Probably his whole life too. Why was he even still here? Ed frowned, and even though his mind was not quite ready to go back to sleep, his body was very much so.
"I am sorry, Mustang," he whispered carefully and laid back down. "I mean... bastard."
Roy decided to work from home the next day. He always carried a messenger bag, bursting at the seams with paperwork, just in case he would actually feel like doing some work out of the office. Ed had been placed on the sofa in Roy's home office in the basement, with his ankle tightly bandaged and raised on a pillow. Now, he was lounging comfortably on the couch, alongside a stable of books he had picked out from Roy's personal library.
He had shut off again, but not because of trauma this time. The many books in Roy's home had swallowed and devoured the kid completely. Roy smiled as he gazed across the room. This was the first time in the last 24 hours he had seen the boy relax. He clearly needed it. Roy needed it too. This morning Ed had woken up with a bad chough and a runny nose. His leg wasn't looking any better either. Actually it looked worse, and that worried him.
The rest of the day went by mostly uneventful. Roy had worked for a couple of hours, and Ed had been reading continually. They were even being civil towards each other. Some quarreling had occurred, but that was to be expected as two so clearly opposite personalities had to spend any kind of prolonged time together. They had also decided that Ed's temporarily best method of transportation around the house was on Roy's shoulders. At first it had been a challenge, with Ed's wounded pride coming in the way. But then it seemed like he started to enjoy it. Ed was curious about everything and seated on Roy's shoulders, he could follow along without being too much of a hinder.
After getting Ed off to bed that night, Roy could not sleep. He had felt so inadequate last night, while today had been kind of fun, and that was just as unsettling for Roy.
Tomorrow he had to go back to the office, and Ed couldn't stay home by himself while sick and injured. He probably had to bring him along. Maybe he should take Ed to the infirmary to get his leg looked at while they were there.
Roy sighed. He could already hear Havoy and Breda's comments about him becoming soft. And, maybe he was, because when did he start to care about what those clowns thought?
Hawkeye would be pleased with him though. Roy caught himself smiling, then shook his head. Naaaah, he definitely didn't care what she thought of him...
...okay, maybe just a little.
Ed sat on Roy's shoulders as they arrived at the HQ the next morning. He was not too happy with having to tag along to Roy's office, so Roy had left out the part where he was taking him to be assessed by a doctor. Ed had been very assertive that he could take care of himself. But eventually, Roy had talked him into coming voluntarily, bribing him with the HQ official library.
At least they seemed to be the first ones arriving, Ed thought, a bit self-conscious about his spot on the colonel's shoulders.
"Good morning," Hawkeye greeted automatically, not lifting her eyes from the paperwork in front of her.
Ed had been wrong.
"Good morning, first lieutenant," Roy answered, seemingly unfazed by her early presence.
"Morning," Ed chimed in.
At first, Riza did not seem to react to the new addition to the office, but after a couple of seconds she arched her eyebrows, gazing up at the strange pair. She looked them over appraisingly, before settling into a devious smile.
"Nice to see you Edward," she murmured affectionately, turning her attention back to her workload.
"He sprained his ankle," Roy clarified, realizing that they may be looking a bit strange. No matter how young the 16-year-old might appear, a piggyback ride could seem a bit excessive. He knew Riza would not judge though, and was probably just content that Roy had ended up taking care of the kid after all.
After about an hour of work, Roy finally brought Edward to the library as he had promised. Edward almost jumped off his back with eagerness as they entered the comfortably lit room. Still with the boy sitting on his shoulders, Roy got a couple of military files out of a locked archive. While reading silently, he stood by Ed's bookcase of choice, letting him look through the shelf undisturbed. After a couple of minutes, Roy looked up from his reading.
"Have you found something jet?"
"Uh-"
"Hey!" Roy smacked his file closed, catching the boy in reading it from his position over the Colonel's head. "These are confidential!"
"Sorry," Ed smiled in embarrassment. "What does Debellatio mean?"
"I am not discussing military business with you, Edward," Roy snarled. Ed still looked like he wanted to say something, but decided against it when hearing Roy's threatening tone. Instead, he grabbed a book, balancing it between himself and the back of Roy's head, and then picked up another one.
"Kay, done."
Roy turned to leave the library but startled when he noticed Havoc standing by the opposite shelf, puffing at his cigarette as he usually did. What did seem different was the astonished expression on his face, replacing his regular carefree and crooked smile.
It was not hard for Roy to guess that it was because of his new slightly unconventional, sixteen-year-old neckpiece.
"Secon Leiuntenant Havoc," Roy addressed his subordinate sternly as he passed him by, while Ed gave an overly ceremonial, but probably sarcastic, salute.
"You know, Edward," Roy said, while they walked down the long hallway connecting the office area and the library. "Giving a salute with your left hand is considered extremely insulting."
Ed answered with a slap at the back of the Colonel's head. "Screw you, Colonel fatass."
"My... my ass isn't fat."
Edward's last comment had made their next stop a lot easier.
Instead of going into the offices, Roy made a turn and opened a door to a stairwell. He followed the steps down two floors to the basement. Opening the next door, they immediately left the feeling of an office environment behind. Because this was a hospital.
Roy felt Ed's hand pinch the top of his head, grabbing onto his hair and pulling relentlessly.
"Ouch, stop that!" he sneered, swatting at Edward's hand.
"W-why would you bring me down here?" Ed stuttered timidly. Roy let out a deep breath.
"Your ankle looks bad," he explained with forced patience. "I want a medic to take a look at it."
"N-no, it's better. It's fine. Doesn't even hurt," Ed stammered, awfully guarded and shifting his attention towards every sound in the bleak scene.
"It'll be fine Edward, they're just going to look at it. Maybe do an x-ray. It's nothing to worry about."
A young man in a white coat approached them. He was a bit shorter than Roy, had his blonde hair cut pin-short to cover up the premature balding and was wearing glasses with frames that were way too big for his small head.
"Colonel Mustang, it's nice to see you again," he greeted and shook Roy's hand before turning his attention to Ed.
"You must be Edward. I'm Dr. Leroy Munk."
Fittingly enough, Ed thought, looking at the bald spot and the thin hair still desperately clinging to the man's head with skepticism.
Dr. Munk reached his hand out to formally greet him too, sporting an overwhelmingly positive attitude. Ed's stubbornness made sure that the gesture went unanswered, and Roy was secretly enjoying Ed's reluctant behavior towards the young doctor. He was a very nice man, for sure, but he definitely addressed Ed as much younger than he actually was.
Ed refused Roy to come into the examination room with him, which was fine with Roy. He weighed the options between going back to the office and having them call him when they were done, or nod off in the waiting room for a while. The choice had been easy if it was not for his blonde-haired first lieutenant entering through the door, just a couple of minutes after he had sat down.
Roy scoffed, unwillingly getting off his chair. Something in her eyes made him slightly worried.
"Sir?" she said, walking up to him, looking around the room. "Is Edward with the doctor?" she asked.
"Yes, they just went in." Just a little white lie, in case she had come to scold him for avoiding his workload.
"Do you think there is somewhere we can talk in private?"
Roy peered down at her, before nodding curtly and taking the lead towards the reception to ask for a vacant office or meeting room. They were pointed towards a room down the hall and as they entered, Riza locked the door behind them.
"What's going on, First Lieutenant?" Roy asked urgently. "You're making me worried."
Riza turned and looked at him, letting out a deep sigh. "I was going to talk to you about this yesterday, but you weren't in."
Roy sat down on a chair by a wooden table and folded his hands on his stomach. "Continue."
Riza was acting strange, a bit frantic. She sat down on the chair beside Roy. "When Edward left the office two days ago, I decided to do some snooping around."
And that explained why she was acting so franticly. Investigating without an order. Roy bowed his head deeply, now understanding her strange behavior.
"I wanted to see if maybe there were someone back in Risembool that could take the boy in. Some neighbors, friends of the family, etc, you know." She couldn't keep her hands still, tapping her fingers on the manila folder she'd been hugging since she had come down to the infirmary.
"Riza." Roy made a motion with his hand that told her to stop. "Calm down, please."
She closed her eyes for a few moments, before continuing with newfound ease. "I looked into a couple of their closest neighbors and found a family that seemed to have close ties with Hoenheim. They are called the Rockbells."
Roy wasn't sure how he felt about this.
"They already adopted a boy from an orphanage close by some years ago." She finally let go of the death grip on the folder, sliding it over to Roy. Roy opened it carefully and was met with a picture of a toddler, clipped to what he recognized as adoption forms. Lifting the picture to read the content, he suddenly froze and looked up at Riza in disbelief. She nodded slightly.
"I don't think Alphonse Elric is dead."