If prompted to tell of it, Exdeath could make an excellent story out of his own origins.
It was a fantastical tale in and of itself. Eons and eons ago, before the worlds ever existed as these warriors knew them, there was a Sorcerer-King named Enuo. Already the most powerful being in his own world, he constantly sought even more power. He wanted dominion over all worlds, not just his own. Dominion, even, over the Void, the nothingness that all Life returns to upon its death from its mortal prisons.
In his pursuit, Enuo targeted the four Elemental Crystals. Essences of Life itself - Water, Fire, Air, and Earth. He planned to use the Void to suck all power from the Crystals, absorb it into himself, and drain the world of all life until it perished. Exdeath was one of his soldiers. A powerful fiend, one of thousands, who fought and killed the humans and their worlds for Enuo.
But the humans, seeing the threat to their worlds, fought back. They used the power of the near-drained Crystals to seal Enuo away in the Void he so desperately craved. And all of his ranks were sealed away as well, in the trees of the Great Forest of Moore. Exdeath's body and his consciousness were crammed into the bark. He and many others were seeped into the roots, twisted around the branches. Eventually, all of those souls congealed and morphed, twisting together to form individual and sentient beings within the trees of the Forest themselves.
Exdeath was the only one powerful enough, and consumed with enough hatred to ever break out of his tree.
He remembered his time as a tree. He remembered being unable to move his painfully twisted and gnarled limbs for millennia. Being unable to speak to another soul, only able to push against the other consciousnesses crowding around his until he finally consumed them and amassed their power. It was torture. He pulled them into himself until their essences disappeared and only he was left. He planned his ultimate escape from the tree. For millennia he planned how he would exact his revenge upon the people who sealed him there. He planned his ascent to become the next Enuo, the most powerful being in all of the worlds.
He would rather go back to being sealed in a tree than spend any extra and unnecessary time with Kefka. The jester followed him to the Rift, rather than follow Ultimecia to her castle or stay and bother the Emperor.
Exdeath resorted to ignoring him. Completely, blatantly-
"You sure you don't wanna show me what's under that helmet, Deathy?"
Exdeath slowly turned towards Kefka, even leaning slightly downward to try and make him feel small. Usually it worked, but Kefka was brainless. He couldn't even glare at him with his helmet in the way. It prevented any sort of emotional display.
"I won't laugh, I promise!"
He could feel the rage climbing. His fists clenched so hard that they trembled, as he imagined how much pressure it would take to crush Kefka's skull with his bare hands. It was by sheer force of will he restrained himself.
"Ple-e-e-ease-"
"You ask me that again at your own peril." His voice came out clipped and tight through his clenched teeth.
"Deathy-y-y-"
"No, no, NO! For the last time, you cretin, I will not remove my helmet for you!" To drive his threat home, he summoned his sword to his clenched fist, then allowed it to hover in the air between him and Kefka as a last warning.
But of course, Kefka found a way to ignore it.
With a screeching yowl, Kefka sprang from the ground and leapt straight over the sword, straight towards Exdeath. He latched on, wrapping his legs around Exdeath's torso like a leech. He tugged and pried at the helmet, attempting to detach it from Exdeath's shoulders.
"Come on, come on! It's gotta come off, somehow!" Kefka jabbed his fingers into the slit, and tried to brace it open.
"RRRRAAAUUUGH!" Exdeath roared, as Kefka's fingers stabbed and clawed at his face. He back-pedaled as fast as his trunk-like legs could carry him. He writhed and thrashed as much as he could in his armor. He could not detach Kefka from his face.
The Emperor was a fool.
Even after Chaos's direct threat, the Emperor was still trying to overthrow him. His tenacity was commendable, Ultimecia thought as she left Pandaemonium. Unfortunately, he was too arrogant to realize he was an insect under Chaos's boot. Even at his full power, the Emperor could never hope to contend with Chaos. And if he thought she honestly believed his promise of payment, then he was an even bigger fool. He had outright admitted that he had no plan to realize his ambitions, only ideas, yet he was willing to send her on a petty errand in the meantime while he figured it out. It was probably to keep her distracted from him while he acted against Chaos so she didn't capitalize on his efforts, whatever they were. He didn't feel threatened by Exdeath or Kefka, so he had probably asked them to participate so she would be forced to babysit them. Another layer of distraction to divert her attention.
She wondered what Kefka and Exdeath thought of his little plan. He hadn't promised them anything tangible like he promised her, so they had agreed on principle - Chaos warriors destroying Cosmos warriors. But she still wondered if they saw through it just as she did and if they knew it was a cover up for other major plans. The most likely place to find Exdeath was the Rift so Ultimecia called a pocket of darkness. She pictured the Rift down to the exact platform she wanted and willed another opening into existence, stepping through. There was a brief feeling of weightlessness, then a rush of air, and she traveled there right as a demonic roar reached her ears.
"RRRRAAAUUUGH!" Exdeath's sword clattered to the ground and he clawed at Kefka, who was wrapped around his face like a pastel-colored vine. "GET OFF OF ME, KEFKA!"
"I JUST WANT TO SEE YOUR FACE!"
"KEFKA!"
The clown even called a fire to his palm, seconds away from blowing the helmet off of Exdeath's face.
These imbeciles were to be her partners in crime.
"Excuse me!" Ultimecia yelled in between Exdeath's cries. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" Kefka froze, arching his back and craning his neck to peer at Ultimecia upside down. Exdeath still struggled but he did it silently, scratching at Kefka's clothes and back. "Put that away, Kefka, and stop acting like a fool!"
Reluctantly, Kefka closed his fist over the fire. "Nice to see you too, deary."
She scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Have you truly considered the Emperor's proposal?" she asked, trying to sound indifferent.
Exdeath grabbed a fistful of the feathers in Kefka's hair. "I have," he said, a little out of breath. He yanked and peeled Kefka away and threw him to the ground, and Kefka yelped in protest. "There is something amiss," Exdeath continued. "Either this Rosa is powerful and he is afraid of her, or defeating her is some small part of a larger scheme."
"I came to the same conclusion. Any idea what his real plan is?"
"None," Exdeath said. "But I do not care to know it. It is of no consequence to me. Whether he succeeds or not, all will return to nothingness. He will lose in the end."
"Will you still go through with helping him?"
"Kill Rosa?" Exdeath asked. "Yes. As I told the Emperor, it is of no extra effort on my part to send a warrior to the Void."
"I'm still helping because I've been craving some fun!" Kefka yelled from the ground as though anyone had asked him. By then he was reclined on his side, with his elbow on the ground to support his head.
"Let's agree to keep an eye out for her then," Ultimecia said. "If any one of us spots her, we will alert the others."
"Agreed," Exdeath said. "Until then, do not contact me, Kefka." Exdeath called his sword back with his magic and disappeared in the next blink, leaving Kefka and Ultimecia together in the Rift.
Kefka stood up from the ground and leaned in to her, as though about to share a secret despite being the only two people there. "You can't tell me you've never wondered what his face looks like."
Ultimecia waved him away and sighed. "While you ponder your profound thoughts," she sneered sarcastically, "keep an eye out for Rosa." She left Kefka to return to her tower.
A/N: I actually finished this before the last chapter but didn't want to post two right away.
I had this chapter written in the old Petal one - the one posted on - so I just fixed it up. I loved it then. But I love it even more now because in the newest Dissidia NT trailer Kefka totally man-handles Tidus and Exdeath, and pulls them both through a portal. It was really funny to watch, and I was like, "OMG I WROTE SOMETHING LIKE THAT!" :D
Anyway, let me know what you think of this fic so far~!
UPDATE OMFG UPDATE! OKAY SO THE OPEN BETA FOR DISSIDIA IS OUT AND I'VE BEEN WATCHING CUTSCENES IN JAPANESE BUT THERE'S A SCENE WITH TIDUS, FIRION, and SHANTOTTO VERSUS - GUESS WHO! - KEFKA, ULTIMECIA, and EXDEATH, and ULTY TAKES THE LEAD! Like OMFG guy I WROTE SOMETHING LIKE THAT IN PETAL!
The new Dissidia is literally turning into everything I hoped for! I hope the story mode pays off when we get to hear it in English!