There's a ladybug creeping up her index finger. Reishi observes it with the bored gaze of a lazy cat until it reaches her fingertip and flies away. She closes her eyes and follows its small chakra signature until it's outside her range and then remains with her eyes closed, feeling a slight breeze play with her bangs. Her hair has been getting too long lately, perhaps she should cut it.
Days like this, sunbathing in the back garden, are the ones that bring memories of her past life. The memories come as figments, never a complete memory, but enough to bring with them a feeling of nostalgia. The images in her head and reality overlap, a shadow taking the place of someone in real life, a building that suddenly turns into another...
Reishi has no idea why she can remember some things perfectly, but her family remains such a distant memory. Maybe they weren't close?
Something blocks the sun over her eyes and she opens them to find Ryouji smiling down at her, for a moment his face seems to be that of another man, and the ghost image trails behind him as he moves, as if trying to imprint itself on him. After a few seconds the image gives up and dissolves.
"Hey there, Rei-chan."
"Hi, dad, do you need something?"
"Awww, can't I just want to see what my precious daughter is up to?" He sits down next to Reishi and she shrugs. "So, what were you doing?"
"There was a ladybug, but it flew away."
"Ah! Those treacherous bugs!" He says, shaking his fist in the air at what Reishi supposes is the escaped ladybug. It's the wrong direction. In a lower tone, he adds, "don't tell any Aburame I said that."
Reishi snorts.
"Dad..."
"Alright, alright, just- Follow me, I have something for you."
Ryouji gets up and starts walking towards the house and Reishi takes a few seconds to follow. He leads her into his studio; the shelves are full to the brim with books and scrolls and the smell of ink permeates the air as if he had just spilled an inkwell. Reishi suspects that he may be a fūinjutsu specialist, but she doesn't want to ask in case he decides to start teaching her that too.
She doesn't notice the small package on the table until Ryouji reaches for it, he looks at it fondly for a few seconds before extending it to her.
Upon picking it up, Reishi realizes that it's soft and malleable, some kind of clothing perhaps? She looks back at Ryouji, who is smiling at her expectantly, and opens it. Inside there is a violet haori with dark blue flowers and black details, on its back there's a symbol Reishi recognizes. It's the symbol emblazoned on Ryouiji's clothes.
"That is our family's crest," he explains, "we might be the last members of the Ikotsu clan, but we must honour our ancestors and wear our crest with pride."
Reishi lets the memory fade away, and contemplates her reflection. The haori is still too big for her despite a year having passed, Ryouji probably bought it thinking that she wouldn't wear it until she graduated, maybe until she made chūnin. If that was the case, why would he give it to her so early?
She wonders if he knew already that he wouldn't be coming back from that mission. She wonders if it was a goodbye present, something to remember him by.
Whatever it was, it doesn't change the fact that the haori is still too big to be worn by her, so she folds it and returns it to its rightful place in her closet. Before closing the door, she inspects her face yet again, she doesn't think she will ever get used to it.
Reishi has never thought of Ryouji and Fuhaku as parents; biologically speaking, yes, she accepts that, but that and acknowledging them as parents-parents…
It's a complicated relationship.
But now, as she looks in the mirror she can see more clearly Ryouji's prominent cheekbones and jawline and Fuhaku's dead eyes in her still baby face. The thing that reminds her the most about Ryouji though, is her hair. It is grey; not a pretty silvery grey or an almost white elegant hue, no, hers is dark like tempered steel. She can never stand looking at herself in the mirror, knowing full well that the image she will find isn't the one she expects. It's wrong, but still…
She isn't going to lie, she misses Ryouji. Perhaps not as a father, but maybe as a particularly close uncle. So, knowing that she carries something of his within herself is comforting, in a way.
She also doesn't know what to do with Fuhaku, the woman never seems to leave her room nowadays and when she does, it's to rummage through the kitchen cabinets in search for more sake, or wine, or whatever it is that is keeping her drunk at the moment.
Fuhaku's sisters come by at least twice a week to check on them, though they are really bad at covering how unnerved they are by Reishi's presence. Like she is a possessed child of some sort. Reishi hasn't completely discarded that possibility, but she leans more on the reincarnation theory. Not that they need to know that.
Even though Fuhaku doesn't press her for it anymore, she keeps hanging out with Obito, who has quickly ingrained himself as a constant in her life. Like a persistent fungus. Or a chronic disease.
After she joined the academy, they had started training together, though they are still way away from sparring, as Reishi hasn't yet started to learn taijutsu, or any kind of jutsu for that matter. Their training sessions consist on running laps, push-ups and various other exercises to gain muscle and endurance, as well as throwing practice.
Reishi hasn't miraculously decided that she wants to be a ninja or that she wants to become a damn hero, but Ryouji's death has helped her to see this world as it is; helplessly violent. She has realized that the only law here is the law of the jungle – big animal eats small animal – and self-defence will just go so far in the 'keeping herself alive' department. Her shift in plans consists in her making it to genin, and staying there. You could say it's Plan B.
Genin aren't sent to the front line, instead being kept close to the village to protect Konoha in case of an invasion – something that will only happen twice, whether she is a civilian or a genin, if her memory is correct – or to take D-Rank missions.
She will have to make sure to be busy during the chūnin exams so she won't have to partake in the fighting, and nobody is going to die permanently during Pein's invasion as far as she knows.
It's the perfect plan, fool proof. She will have a regular income and, being the daughter of a chūnin and a civilian, nobody will have great expectations for her, so she won't be pressured to go up in the ranks. Except by Obito, but he doesn't count, he sees the best in everyone.
It takes Obito weeks of nagging, and agreeing to go with her to the library to study, to get Reishi to train with him. She doesn't plan on getting freakishly strong, just enough, so she hadn't planned on adding to the training the academy already provided, but saying no to Obito is very difficult.
Right now, she is sitting with her legs crossed and her eyes closed, practising her chakra sensing with Obito. The exercise mainly consists on Obito just going about his katas as he normally would while she tries to follow the way his chakra flows inside his coils.
She had only told him that she was meditating because she didn't want to seem creepy, which she is being anyway, and because she didn't want anyone in the academy to know she is a sensor.
Frowning, she swats that thought away as she would with a fly and tries to focus on Obito's chakra, – breathe in – there is a chunk of chakra flowing through the coil parallel to the Brachial Artery – breathe out – and steadily making its way forward, apparently dispersing upon reaching Obito's fingertips. If she had to imagine the movement of chakra, she would picture it like waves generating in the core and making their way through different channels until they lost force.
Judging by how the chakra is moving along his right arm, he must be practising some form of haishu over and over. It seems repetitive.
She tries not to let her mind drift and think too much about how Obito's chakra feels almost like Ryouji's. He probably had been a 'fire type' like Obito. If she had to compare both, she would say that Ryouji's was like the embers of a dim fire on a winter's night; warm and comforting, whereas Obito's feels pretty much like sunrays on your skin in a Spring's evening.
She wonders how her own chakra feels; she is so used to it that it just feels like a shapeless blob, which sucks balls because she is curious about it.
After chakra sensing she decides to practice with senbon and Obito joins her with some shuriken of his own. They are both terrible at it. Obito had actually tried to 'teach her' how to properly throw senbon once. They don't talk about it.
The moment they are finished with their training session, she sits in the grass to study. It's a beautiful day, so cramming in the library would be a waste, besides, Obito seems to think better under the sun. Maybe the Uchiha have some kind of secret photosynthesis technique they snatched from the Senju or something.
She ignores the thought and focuses on the book in her lap, a task that is getting more difficult by the second, with a certain Uchiha peering over her shoulder.
She sends him an accusatory glare, probably not as scary as it should have looked, because she is five and has baby cheeks, and because he is used to her by now. Obito smiles sheepishly and shrugs, clearly unfazed.
"I was just curious. What are you reading? That's not an academy textbook." As a response, she closes the book and shows him the cover, making him grimace. "Ugh, Clans of Konoha? Seriously?"
She shrugs back. "It's more interesting than the textbooks," she says with a blank stare. Obito groans.
"That's not the point Rei-chan, that book is as thick as my forearm, why on earth would you want to read it?!"
"Ow, shut up, you don't have the right to criticize me, your grades are lower than the dirt." He makes a hurt face, moving his hand to clutch his chest in mock agony. "Rei-chan, how could you?"
Reishi rolls her eyes, but lets herself smile a little. He wasn't like that in canon, was he? Maybe she is a bad influence.
"Besides," he adds, "you're one to talk, you're dead last in the physical stuff."
She lets the smile fall from her face, annoyed. "It's not my fault that the rest of the kids in the class are little freaks of nature. They're too fast and strong to be human. What the hell do they eat?" she fumes, and Obito pinches her cheek.
"Language."
"I know, I know," she says while swatting at the offending hand. "It's just… how do they do it? It's not natural."
"Maybe they just enhance chakra better than you? It used to happen to me all the time because I would use too much-"
Obito keeps rambling but Reishi isn't listening anymore. Of course. Chakra enhancement. Duh. She hadn't remembered that. Why hadn't she? It's so obvious… She resists the urge to smack her forehead.
How does people do the chakra enhancement thing anyways? Their teacher hasn't taught that yet at the academy, has he? Is it like a natural thing all ninjas do or something? Again, why couldn't she remember any of that from the series? Surely, they must have had explained it in some episode.
She glances at Obito, who keeps talking alone, unaware of her lack of attention. Maybe she should ask him?
No. She will try to learn on her own first, if it doesn't work she will ask him.
Satisfied with her decision, she manages to get Obito to stop talking and start doing his homework, he still complains about it being unnecessarily difficult from time to time but she is pleased to see that he is actually making progress.
Unlike her, Obito isn't against asking for guidance when there's something he doesn't understand – if you aren't a pint-sized jerk like Kakashi, that is – and she had explained to him most of the math problems a few days ago.
At first when she offered her help he was sceptical of having his kōhai explain anything algebra-related to him – which also, what the hell; why was he learning algebra already, he was what, seven? – but he had warmed up to the idea soon enough.
To her surprise, Obito isn't nearly as stupid as he was portrayed in the series, he actually learns pretty fast and when she points out a mistake, he barely makes it again. It must have been something to do with the way his teacher explains things, or maybe it's just easier for him to focus on her; she isn't an expert in that aspect though, so the only way she has to help him is tutoring him.
After this they go their separate ways, Obito had suggested to go eat some dango before returning home but she didn't want to keep walking around all sticky and sweaty so she had turned him down.
He leaves with a pout that makes her feel a bit guilty – because Obito is essentially a puppy and you do not say no to puppies without feeling bad about it – but she has better things to do, like figure out how to use chakra enhancing, so it couldn't be helped.
When she arrives home, one of her aunts is sitting on the couch with her mother, and going by the sounds that are coming from the kitchen, the other one is raiding the cabinets from any alcohol bottles she can find. Joke's on her though, Fuhaku is very good at hiding her secret stash of wine. Reishi would know, she has tried to get rid of it several times already.
She takes in the form of Fuhaku, slumped on the couch with the eyes lost in some random crack of the ceiling. It is frustrating, even for someone as apathetic as Reishi, to see her crumble down this way. Even if they try to help her, ultimately only she could help herself.
She nods at her aunt as a form of acknowledgment and makes her way to her room, where she picks a new set of clothes to change into after taking a shower. She has never had a good relationship with her mother's side of the family – her father's side of the family could be found engraved on the memorial stone –, they don't like her, and she doesn't like them. They tend to be frivolous as only civilians can be.
Her mother is the younger daughter of a rich merchant, and the family as a whole considers the shinobi life unworthy of their status. They hadn't been happy about Reishi's general weirdness before, but their already strained relationship snapped the moment she decided to follow the steps of her 'father'.
That is… acceptable. After all, Reishi doesn't have any interest in being tied to a family again, not because of bad past experiences. She just doesn't see the point in becoming attached to these people when she is already making plans to leave them behind as soon as she can.
It is for the best that she keeps her distance, as she won't be able to give them what they deserve. By distancing themselves from her, they are just making things easier for both ends, so Reishi is pretty satisfied with this outcome.
Once she gets out of the shower, she changes into some comfy looking pants her mother had bought for her, and a simple shirt. Ryouji's outfits always used to be different combinations of purple, black and grey (sometimes with blue thrown in, 'to spice things up', he had said). He had explained to her one day that those were the colors of their clan, and that even if it was a small clan and they were the only members left, they should honor their ancestors. Reishi wears those colors too, less because of the ancestors' thing and more because it's something to keep him close.
Her clothes doesn't have the Ikotsu crest emblazoned yet, mostly because she fears Fuhaku might have an anxiety attack if she sees the symbol that had always belonged to her husband's back again.
Reishi picks one of the books in Ryouji's library – it's hers now, Fuhaku doesn't want anything to do with them because they are about ninja techniques but she doesn't want to sell them either – and lays it open in the floor of their back garden by the pages depicting some of the easier katas.
She practices the movements before trying to use her chakra, until she is comfortable enough to do the motions with her eyes closed. Once she has memorized the motions, she closes her eyes and concentrates on the flow of her chakra.
She tries guiding it through the fourth and third gates and discovers that every time one of the chakra 'waves' passes through a gate its force intensifies, like a weird snowball effect. That couldn't do. Her use of chakra has to be precise and she can't afford wasting it unnecessarily, she will have to take the gates into account and draw less chakra from the core to compensate.
She doesn't know how much she needs yet, but taking her discovery into consideration will probably be useful in the future. She doesn't want to end up exhausted at the minimum effort if she can help it.
She directs the chakra wave through the coils of her right arm as she slices through the air with her hand, immediately noticing the difference. She had let the chakra disperse too early though, and she had used too much. Of course, she isn't expecting to master Tsunade's pinpoint accuracy or anything – mostly because she is sure that she will never get to those chakra levels –, so as long as it works it doesn't really matter. And it doesn't need to be perfect due to her planning on just staying in the genin corps forever (or until she comes up with a better plan for defecting).
However, Reishi is of the belief that if you're going to bother doing something, at least you have to do it well. Or as Yoda said once 'do or do not, there is no try'. So she refuses to just let it be after some half-assed try. That and that it takes her too much conscious effort to do it, and she needs to use chakra enhancement as a second nature like the other kids if she wants to at least graduate. Besides, it's not like she has anything better to do.
She spends the rest of the evening practicing again and again her chakra control until she can do it without thinking with a set amount of chakra, then she tries to get used to using more and less respectively until she is satisfied.
It still doesn't come as naturally to her as she would have liked, but she has just started and she is sure she will get better the more she practices. Like with the senbon.
Aaand she has to take another shower. Honestly, why had she showered before, knowing that she was just going to keep practicing? Well, no use on dwelling on it so she might as well get going.
It's already late, almost night, by the time she is done. She walks past Fuhaku's bedroom, who has fallen asleep with the door open, and watches her silhouette sleeping on the bed. Every time she sees her she half expects to see the woman's chest stand still, and she waits one, two seconds for it to rise and fall again as she breathes. Once she makes sure that she is alive, she makes her way to the kitchen. Then she makes dinner, eats it and leaves a plate on the counter for Fuhaku; for the inevitable moment every night in which she will get up to drink. At least she won't starve while at it.
It is a routine now; make sure she's alive, make dinner, leave dinner on counter for Fuhaku and go to sleep. Reishi is good at routines.
During the next weeks she adds the chakra enhancement training to her routine, right after hanging out with Obito and before shower time. During that time, her performance in the academy keeps getting better, like a geometrical progression, until she reaches the middle of the ranks… and stays there. That is, until the spars start.
She has been beaten to dust for four days straight because those little beasts don't know the meaning of moderation. For them it's all or nothing. She isn't particularly skilled at performing the katas, nor does she learns them as soon as she sees the teachers do it. But she has an almost perfect chakra control, and she demonstrates as much the moment she knocks her opponent down with a well-placed kick to the gut.
You see, lashing out savagely might seem like a good idea at first, but it falls short when it faces precision. And Reishi had been studying anatomy – she just picks Ryouji's books randomly and reads them when she's bored, which is always – and practicing her chakra control every afternoon during three weeks now, so she has a shitload of precision.
She isn't going to lie and say that seeing the kid's ugly face when he starts crying isn't the most satisfying thing that has happened to her all week. Because it is. It feels damn good. But the assessing look her instructor has when he looks at her afterwards puts a damper in her good mood. She can't stand out too much if she wants to be just an average student.
She resolves to work on her blocking or dodging from then on – she is sure that Obito will be glad to finally have a sparring partner –, she isn't going to kick any more ass from now on, but that doesn't mean that she will just let the monsters in sparring class use her as a punching bag.
Luckily, the written part of the academy holds no secrets for her, and she even finds interesting the most 'foreign' lessons like 'Ninja history' and 'War Tactics'. She always makes sure to write enough content to pass the tests without getting high grades, completing the picture of the perfectly average student.
Life is good.