A/N I have used a derogatory word for a gay person in this chapter, if it easily offends you then you may not want to read further. However, as my grandmother told me when some one had called me the same word. "It's only a word, it has no power over you. The only way it can have power over you is if you allow it to." Happy reading and please leave a review, if you have any suggestions or characters you would like to see let me know. I may be able to include them, but this story is evolving itself. Maybe, just maybe Kevin will come back to us in the next chapter.

Chapter 4

Eddward, was once again looking out of the window in Kevin's room, it was a bright and sunny outside. He could see people standing in the yard down below and knew it was time, Kevin had been home for a few days and friends were wanting to visit Kevin. None of those down below really meant much to Double Dee, he knew them and knew that most had never really noticed him before, the ones who had, he really had no fond memories with. The cul-de-sac group had been over the day before.

Nazz had breezed in early in the morning saying she wanted to beat the crowd, she smiled and hugged Double Dee. This morning the vitals were good, a mite better than yesterday, however there was no smile on Kevin's face. See it was just muscle reflex. Nazz pulled Dee over to the bedside with her and together they stood looking down on Kevin's motionless form.

Nazz turned to Double Dee with tears in her eyes and grabbed the raven haired boy in a tight embrace "it hurts so much to see him like that. He has always been so full of life."

"Yes, he is, and will be again, you just wait and see" Dee reassured her. "I am going down to the kitchen for some coffee, you can stay for a bit and visit. When you feel you have to go send the next person up."

Double Dee walked out the door and headed down the stairs, he could see thru the opened door the people outside waiting to go up and see Kevin. Why do I feel as if they seem to be here for a show, or final visitation.

Now, Eddward, you know most of them are Kevin's friends and team mates.

He walked into the kitchen and over to the coffeepot as he poured a cup he heard Mrs. Barr speak to him.

"Edd, I... I want to thank you for all you have done, after the last few years I know this is such a burden for you. Kevin wasn't always nice to you and I've wondered what happened that caused my two favorite little boys to grow apart. However in the last year you and Kevin have seemed to fix whatever was the problem."

"Just childish mistakes on our part, but we are friends again..."

Mrs Barr looked over at Edd and saw a sad far away dreamy look in his face.

Edd was visioning two thirteen year old boys, one red headed with emerald eyes, the other Black headed with deep blue eyes looking at each other. They were looking into each others eyes. Neither were smiling.

Dee thought back to earlier that same day, Kevin had called and invited him over. Since starting middle school their friendship had been strained, well actually it was before that but had became worse over the years. It had really started when Edd had became friends with Ed and Eddy. Edd had came upon Kevin and Eddy arguing whose friend the raven haired boy actually was. Because Edd detested violence, he pulled Eddy away to keep Kevin from fighting him. Kevin took that move as Edd didn't want to be his friend anymore, and had stormed off home in a rage.

"Fine, go be friends with the dorks, see if I care" He had yelled back over his shoulder. For several years Double Dee had tried to play mediator to the group, but Eddy kept them in a state of animosity with Kevin. Kevin had responded in return by bullying the group of Eds. Although he usually went easier on Double Dee than the other too.

One day Kevin had called Dee and asked him to come over to his home. As Dee walked up the walkway to the redhead's front door he wondered if this was a trap or did Kevin really want him over. Dee could see through the front window of Kevin's home thru the living room into the kitchen. Kevin was standing at the stove cooking something. The emerald eyed boy was dancing around and singing into his spatula to the song Barbie Girl. He spun around just as Dee laughed at the antics. He called thru the open window "What are you laughing at Dork? C'mon in the doors open."

Dee opened the door and called, "Greetings Kevin, I'm sorry I laughed but the sight of you dancing to that song was just too funny, and the look on your face priceless."

Kevin was dressed is some black sweat pants, and his red hat, He wasn't wearing a shirt which caused Double Dee to blush, and then blush again as he remembered he now had a picture of that scene on his new smart phone that his parents had sent him.

Kevin grinned, turned and started the song over again and did the whole routine over for Dee. He still loved to see Dee smile. When the song was over. He offered Dee a water and asked him to sit down at the table, Kevin sat down across the table facing him.

Dee blushed again as he looked at his friend wondering what he wanted him to come over for, surely not just to put on that dance routine for him. Seeing the blush Kevin reached over and grabbed a tee shirt and pulled it on.

"Dork, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for being so mean to you and your friends, Please forgive me and let's be friends again." Kevin stated, the smile leaving his face. His eyes took on a serious look as he looked at Double Dee.

"I don't know Kevin so much has passed between us. You have bullied us so much, now I am not saying that due to Eddy's schemes we didn't deserve most of it. Also there have been times that you have actually been friendly to me and protected me from others. Dee's face took on the same serious look. The boys sat there and looked at each for several moments.

The crimson haired boy, put on a pouty face and said "pweese, Dee, I truly am sorry and I am trying to turn over a new leaf." He turned his pout face into some big old puppy dog eyes, letting a little quivering smile cross his lips. "c'mon Dork, say we'll be friends again."

"Actually Kevin, I never really remember saying that we had stopped being friends. It was you that pushed me away. You said you have a reputation to uphold now that you were starting high school. That was that day your dad's brother was here visiting and he caught you giving me a hug. I heard what he told you, about you couldn't be hugging boys, that you should be hugging girls, and not that you had a chance to be on the baseball and football teams you had to grow up and act like a man."

Kevin hung his dead, and frowned at the memory. That was a rough day. After his uncle Bob had left his dad had called him over to the recliner where he spent most of his time, due to the cancer. He told Kevin. "Never listen to that idiot, he was small minded. That Kevin should like whoever caught his eye and that he would always love him. Kevin's father passed away a couple of days after that discussion. His uncle was relentless after that molding Kevin to get into sports so that he could get a scholarship to go to college, It would be the only means for him to go to college. He had to act like a real man if he wanted to get anywhere in sports.

The day of the funeral Edd was walking around the cul-de-sac and had noticed Kevin standing in the garage next to his father's motorcycle crying. He hurried over to offer Kevin his condolences, and seeing the tears in his eyes Edd reached over to give the emerald eyed boy a hug.

Double Dee hugged Kevin and gave him a little kiss on the cheek which brought a watery smile to the red head's face. Just then the uncle called from the door.

"Kevin, what did I tell you!"

The emerald eyed boy jumped back and looked at his uncle and then back at Dee and said "Don't touch me Dork! You don't hug or kiss another man." Double Dee just looked at Kevin and turned on his heel and walked to his home.

"You dumb ass, I told you to say 'don't touch me faggot' here's comes that cute little blonde from down the street, hope you get it right this time."

As Nazz walked up she could see a sad distressed look on Kevin's face. She grabbed the green eyed boy in a tight embrace and held him tightly to her. "I'm here Kevin, just let it out."

"That's right boy, now you got it right, you just remember to keep it that way, and no more hugs from that little faggot, ya hear me."

Nazz drew Kevin out of the garage and over to her house without saying a word until the reached the porch swing at her house.

"What was that all about?"

"Uncle Bob saw Double Dee give me a hug and a kiss on the cheek and got upset. He s, s, said I wasn't a man and shouldn't let Dee hug me." Tears rained down the freckled cheeks. Nazz hugged him again and rocked him back and fourth. Nazz was a fast thinker and wanted her friends to be happy no matter what.

"Kevin, you used to call Double Dee your best friend, do you still like him?"

"y y yes," the red head blubbered on her shoulder, "yes I do, I still love my dork. Uncle Bob wants me to go to school and get a sports scholarship so that I can go to college. He said that Dee would hold me back and cause me to be passed over if people thought that about me. Here I thought Dee and I could put the past behind us and be friends again."

"You still can Kev, if Dee said he forgave you and wanted to be friends again, he will forgive you again. Double Dee isn't cold hearted. It means a lot to him to be your friend."

"He just said he would think about it, and now I pulled the unthinkable, because of my uncle. Although I didn't use the words my uncle told me to say."

"What did you say to Double Dee?"

"My uncle said I should call him a fag, but I couldn't. When my uncle shouted at me I said 'don't touch me dork' I didn't want to hurt Dee by calling him that other word."

"I don't know Kevin, it sounds almost the same to me. You've really put your foot in it this time."

"No, Nazz, I once heard other kids calling Double Dee a dork and told him that if I called him that it would help him get used to it and it wouldn't be so bad. That he should remember that when I said it, it was just a cute nickname that couldn't hurt him anymore. What am I to do? I want my dork back in my life."

"Talk to him Kevin, ask him again to be your friend again. Explain to him about the pressure you are under. I am sure Double Dee will understand. You know friends mean the world to Dee. Just remember that no matter what, that new kid, Nat and I have your back in this."

Double Dee was looking out his bedroom window, and had heard the whole conversation between Kevin and his uncle. He saw Nazz come down the street and lead Kevin to her house and his heart broke. Standing there looking at the couple swinging on Nazz's porch Double Dee decided that whatever made Kevin happy was wanted in life.

Later that evening as he was getting ready for bed he looked out his window over to Kevin's home and saw Kevin setting at his desk looking out the window. Just then he caught the red head's eye. The boy waved at Dee and smiled. Dee frowned and turned off his light and went to bed. Seeing the frown on Double Dee made Kevin unhappy. He turned off his light and fell into bed, but sleep would not come. Was it too late, had he driven his double dork away with his own stupidity. All night thoughts swirled in his brain. He remembered what his dad had told him and thought long and hard about priorities in his life. Which was more important some one he loved or getting a scholarship?

A few days later Kevin's uncle went back to his hometown. Before he left he had another speech with Kevin about being a man. The next morning when the emerald eyed boy got up and went down to make breakfast is when he called Double Dee.

It was a Saturday morning and for some unknown reason the raven haired boy had decided to sleep in only waking when his phone went off with the 'if it don't fit, don't force it' ringtone that he had changed it over too. Dee had heard that song on an oldie rock station that Kevin's dad used to listen to.

"Salutations Kevin how may I be of assistance to you?"

"Hey Dee, could you come over to my house, I want to ask you something."

"Why, Kevin haven't you hurt me enough this week? If you want to ask me something go ahead?"

"Its about a problem in math, I need to show you the problem" Kevin knew that if he said it was about homework Double Dork would come over. Dee loved helping people with their education no matter who it was..

"OK, I'll be over in a few moments, I have to get dressed first I just got up."

When Dee crossed the street he could hear 'Barbie Girl' blaring from Kevin's home.

The boys were sitting at the table looking at each other after had made his apology and request of renewed friendship.

"Kevin, I have always and will always be your friend, however I cannot take these feelings you are putting upon me. First you ask me to be your friend then scream at me not to touch you when you obviously need a hug."

"I'm sorry Dee, but my uncle was putting a lot of pressure on me at the time. I am sorry, I've thinking about it a lot and I promise that no matter what will I let that kind of pressure come between us being friends again."

"I don't know Kevin, We cannot foresee what may happen in the future, but I am willing to let the past be behind us and once again try to be your friend." oh what am I doing, this green eyed god has the ability to make me happy or destroy me completely. "Kevin, I have some thing to tell you, after I do you may decide on your own that you may not want us to be friends."

"Well, don't tell me then."

"No, I must, I know the other day you didn't use the "f" word, but I understood what you meant. I have realized..." The ravenette stopped short, he couldn't think. Oh what am I to do, but he does need to know if he rejects me this time I will have to walk away from him, the only man I love. I can never love another, only him. It's those damn green eyes they draw me in and I drown in my love for him, No matter what I will keep on loving him.

"What is it then?"

"Kevin in the last year after much research and thought, I have come to realize that I am gay. If you can't handle that I need to know now, and I will walk out of here and leave you alone."

Kevin sat and looked at Double Dee for a few moments, Dee was beginning to feel as if he had lost the carrot top with his coming out."

"Wow, Dee, I haven't even come to turns with what I like or don't like and here you have already made your mind up. Do you have a boyfriend? One of the Eds maybe."

Double Dee blushed a bright red, "Eww, Kevin they are my friends and I have no desire for them. There is one boy in our school that I like, He's very cute and athletic and I like him very much."

"Does he know, what if he doesn't like you back."

"Well if he doesn't like me, then I will live out my life loving him and no other."

"You gotta tell him Dee, or you will never know if he likes you back."

"No, I don't want him to have problems in his chosen field."

"Dee, come back" Was the words that woke Dee up from his little trip down memory lane. He looked at Mrs. Barr and smiled. Then checked his phone that was blue toothed to the monitors on Kevin's bed.

"Something is off, I best be getting up there and check on Kevin, One of the monitors isn't registering the correct numbers."

"Drink your coffee Edd, I'll go up and check on him, I think he maybe tired of all the company, even though he hasn't shown any signs of noticing anyone in the world yet."

As Mrs Barr reached the top of the stairs she could see one of the football team in there with Kevin. She could see the boy talking and paused to hear what he was saying.

"... getting your horn tooted by your own in house fag, Kevin? Does he get his jollies from seeing you naked? I'll bet he touches you when no one is around. Must be cr..."

"Young man" Interrupted Mrs. Barr, "We don't talk that way in this house. You can leave my home now. You are talking rudely about a friend of this house who have single handly took on the care of my son. It is none of your business what Kevin's friends do, but I will assure nothing goes on in my home that I don't know about. Eddward is most careful about Kevin and takes wonderful care of him. Whereas I haven't seen one of you football players even offer to come and help with Kevin's needs. Now get out of my home. Visitation is over."

She herded the boy down the stairs, pushed him out the door. Looking at the crown on her lawn she announced that since the last visitor was so rude and had upset Kevin visiting was over for today. And slammed the door if their faces.

As she turned around she saw Double Dee run up the stairs, she quickly followed the raven haired boy up the stairs and into Kevin's room. She watched as Edd reached over to touch Kevin's wrist to check his pulse. As she watched the boy fussing over her son she saw him look at the monitors checking each one, her glance fell upon Kevin's face and she was startled.

"Edd, do you see what I see, he has a smile."

"Yes Barbra, I see it. He has been doing that for a few days now. No other signs of consciousness, but he does smile. I was waiting to tell you, I wanted to be sure that it wasn't just muscle reflex from the muscle stimulation exercises that mother prescribed."

"To see my baby smile, is heartening, it brings hope back to me. Maybe he'll wake up soon." They both stood there and looked down at Kevin. Both willing him back from the ether world.

"I emailed mother about it and she said she thinks it is a good sign and that maybe he will back among us soon."