Surprise! I published a new chapter!

Sorry for making you wait this long, hopefully you'll remember everything that happened beforehand haha.

Also I've only recently noticed I have a typo in the title of this fanfic so I'll be fixing that finally.

xXSakuraBlossomsXx: Thank you again for your words of praise! It's nice to see that I am succeeding in making this story funny for someone, since all the jokes lose their charm for me after a several rereads :)

OneOfYourGuests1: could be *winky face*

chloemika: Thanks a lot for the comment, I think Kakashi is crazy smart so I am trying my best to portray him as such!

Midnight Phantasma: Woah, Midnight Phantasma, please continue rambling (although I didn't actually consider your comment as 'rambling' at all!)! Maybe you'll be pleasantly surprised in some of the upcoming chapters? Who knows? *eyebrow wiggle*

fauness333: Thanks, fauness333! I know first person OC's can be kind of annoying to many people, so I tried not to give too many descriptions of Mizu's appearance to allow anyone to project themselves into her without the entire y/n type writing^^ I hope someone does buy you a life-sized Madara poster for your birthday!

OneOfYourGuests2: Thanks for reminding me I haven't updated in a while and for always rereading this fic! Hopefully, you are all confused about this time thing as I am ever since this pandemic, so it seems like I updated the chapter 8 just yesterday haha

Note: I don't watch Boruto, and I don't plan to so if you notice any inconsistencies between what you know happened after the war and what I say happened, that's why. As far as I'm concerned, Naruto after the war is free real estate.

Enjoy!

The Zeigarnik Effect

"...hard-core PDA"

Naturally, I blacked out.

When I came to it, my head was on Kakashi's outstretched legs and he was gently fanning my face with Icha Icha Paradise.

"Wow, that book truly is multi-purpose."

I considered getting up, but realising I can pretend I am on a picnic date with Kakashi in my head, I changed my mind instantly.

"Um, I better stay like this while we discuss this… sensitive information. You know, just in case I black out again."

Kakashi offered an eye-crinkle. "Alright. What's bothering you?"

Let's see. Is it the fact that this man, this drop-dead gorgeous, kind-hearted, gentle, gentle man is supposed to make out with me in front of the entire village just so he could earn a vacation? Or is it the fact that I could feel myself becoming giddy with excitement by simply thinking about it?

I could feel the onset of a nosebleed as I started going into details about all the things that constituted hard-core PDA in my accumulated experience so I decided to snap out of it.

"I know we are supposed to YOLO our way through this hard-earned vacation first, but considering how long you'd planned for it, it's safe to say you have some sort of idea of what needs to be done for the second one?"

"Mm, I'm not sure what you mean by 'YOLO our way through' but, yes. I do have some sort of idea of what's going to happen."

What's going to happen? Wow, I wish I had that kind of unjustified confidence. I mean, I fainted two seconds after he mentioned making out in public and he still thinks I'll be able to go through with the real deal. What a can-do attitude, truly admirable.

"Well, were you planning on telling me the plan? Because I'm not helping you any other way." I glowered at him so as to be more convincing. I think he was well aware he could just rope me in regardless, but he politely refrained from mentioning it.

"I was. But then you fainted."

"Oh... you noticed that?" I smiled, all contrite.

Kakashi chuckled attractively. "I'll tell you eventually. Don't worry – I had to recalibrate to account for your...um...swooning, so we'll take it step by step if that's okay with you."

Yeah, that sounds reasonable. I closed my eyes in order to overview the situation. I was willing to help, I just wasn't of much help at this point. So easing me in gradually was really all that I could handle. Meaning, the first thing on the list would be something inconspicuous. Like, I don't know, holding hands, or a hug, or… lying down in his lap.

"You're already doing great, Mizu. I could see you were struggling at the beginning, but you managed to calm yourself down. Well done."

Oh no. I could've maybe handled lying there in silence, but of course he had to praise me.

I immediately stood up and forced myself to walk away from him so I could blush in peace.

I was slightly cautious of Kakashi ever since the moment he told me he has a plan to ease me into making out with him in public. Three days after, we were on our way to the long-awaited hot springs, and I was one sleepless night away from going insane.

Sure, I was fervidly waiting for his next move, but that made acting normal simply unbearable. I kept throwing furtive glances his way because I have zero self-control, but he seemed not to notice them. I mean, he wasn't supposed to, what with me being a sneaky ninja and all, but then again he was an even sneakier ninja so...maybe he was? Or rather, he did?

I threw another furtive glance his way, but he remained stoic. I screamed internally.

Ugh, I need a distraction. I looked ahead at our travel buddies and considered each of them.

Naruto was happily bickering with Sasuke again. Ever since the Uchiha heir returned they were catching up on all those years they'd spent apart. It would be touching if it wasn't hilarious since they kept getting interrupted by Sai. They managed to confirm all his twisted friendship theories with their twisted friendship practices, so we were all bound to suffer from it at some point in the future. But for now it was funny to watch Sai discredit all Naruto's not-so-humble brags.

"I wish I could help Konohamuru more with his training, but I've been so busy learning to combine all the elemental styles I just don't have time for the little guy." Naruto beamed with his hands behind his head.

Sai smiled his signature neutral smile. "Combining? Is that what you were doing? It looked like you were trying to use the wind to raise the skirts of the passers-by."

Naruto started shouting defensively at Sai saying something about that being for research (Jiraya's influence?) and completely unrelated to the training he did yesterday anyway. Sasuke took the opportunity to walk faster and create some distance between the group and himself. Oh, look at him go. He was technically on parole (the villagers found it hard to trust him after he killed those samurais) so Naruto was only too happy to follow him around and lowkey babysit him. Highkey? He just really missed his best friend.

Naruto stopped shouting at Sai to shout after Sasuke and dashed to catch up.

My beloved sister passively watched the entire episode and didn't even attempt to console her abandoned teammate who was now looking forlornly after Naruto and Sasuke. I mean, as forlorn as Sai can look. One truly had to be a ninja to notice his micro-expressions.

Sakura stretched and turned towards Yamato who seemed tired already. Maybe I should go join them?

I sneaked a glance at Kakashi only to see him observing me from the corner of his eye. Blushing at being caught mid-deed I firmly decided I will never ever lay my eyes on Kakashi ever again.

"Wanna hold hands?"

I know I've just said I will never ever look at him again, but in my defence, I had to see if he was joking. Despite him sounding sincere. And despite those words being spoken softly to prevent others from overhearing.

He was still watching me from the corner of his eye, but now his hand was between us, palm turned upwards. I watched his offered hand in disbelief.

"Oh. Sorry to pressure you."

His hand started to go back into his pocket and I was suddenly faced with very little time to convince myself that holding hands with your best friend is a completely normal thing to do even if you secretly harbour not-so-platonic feelings towards them.

"WAIT!"

Oh no.

I was holding Kakashi's hand with both of mine and everyone was watching. This was like someone took notes during my nightmares and made them real. I quickly crossed my arms, not trusting myself after I felt the warmth of Kakashi's palm.

"I mean, wait. Why are we leisurely walking towards the hot springs, can't we pick up the pace?"

Yamato shrugged. "Well, it is a vaca–"

"Yeah-dattebayo! Mizu-chan, you read my mind! Why are we crawling like some lame snails– ooops." Naruto started backing away defensively from my sister, who was ready to pummel him for insulting her precious summons. "Sakura-chan, I didn't mean it like that, snails are just the first thing that came to mind– um, Mizu-senpai, save me!"

I started praying for him.

"Oi, Mizu-chan! That's so mean, I am not dead yet!"

Sakura smiled "Yet being the key word." She cracked her knuckles.

After that we just tried to catch up with the two so we arrived to the hot springs in no time.

However, upon seeing the hot springs Naruto reserved for us, Sakura's wrath indefinitely multiplied. I have to admit, I was tempted to join her.

We were staying in front of hot springs alright. And the inn next to it looked pretty decent as well. The only issue I had was with the sign in front of the hot springs that said Konoha Onsen (Konyoku).

"Naruto-chan, how could you?"

"I swear I didn't know, Mizu-chan, you have to believe me!"

A single tear dramatically trickled from my eye as I fell to my knees and abandoned the idea of ever relaxing on this vacation. There's no way I could ever relax in mixed-gender hot springs.

Kakashi casually pulled me up to my feet and dusted off my knees. "I'm sure we can find some sort of alternative."

Naruto gulped. "Um, they asked for an advance. It was...substantial."

We sighed unanimously. As we reluctantly made our way towards the inn, we noticed an older couple racing towards us.

"So much for a relaxing vacation," Kakashi murmured.

"Hey, it's never too late to take off your mask and pretend you're someone else. I'm guessing they only have a picture of the Hokage Rock as a reference," I snickered , earning a groan as a response.

Clearly excited, they steadily made their way towards Kakashi who reached for his pouch instantly. Unsure whether they should continue to approach the leader of all ninjas who was fumbling with his weapon pouch, they toned down their enthusiasm to a reluctant walk. Upon setting their eyes on the red book, they renewed their eagerness only for it to simmer down again as they noticed the lewd cover.

Kakashi, who acted oblivious to their changes of pace was now safely behind Icha Icha Violence. The rest of us were subtly snickering at the inn owners' attempt to muster a modicum of respect for the Rokudaime.

"Oh, we are so honoured to have the Hokage-sama visit our humble establishment! Oh we can die happy now!" exclaimed the wife rather convincingly.

"Please, please, come with us, we will show you to your rooms. We have prepared our best room for you, Hokage-sama!" joined in the husband.

They ushered us in and started down one of the hallways.

"Oh, let's first get your entourage settled in, just so we could save the best for last!"

"Great suggestion, Hanako-chan, as always! Please – this way!"

We followed them to a simple room with six futons folded neatly in the corner. There was a lot of space inside and it was spotless, albeit plain. The windows were open, letting in the breeze from the outside to create a pleasant flow of air.

The room was fine, but I wasn't looking forward to Naruto's snoring. Yamato's patented Naruto-proof earplugs worked flawlessly, but they blocked hearing too effectively for a ninja to feel comfortable wearing them. Ugh, maybe I can get a separate room with Sakura?

"Mizu."

I turned towards Kakashi's voice. He was waiting at the doorway with the owners who just managed to recover from the knowledge that the Hokage reads porn in public and were now once again exchanging horrified glances.

"Oh, forgive us, Hokage-sama! We were unaware you were travelling with your wife (or that you had a wife, for that matter)! Thank Kami that our Hokage room (we have named it especially to honour you, Hokage-sama) comes with a large bed!"

"Oh, yes, and the sweet wine and chocolates we've left for you will only taste so much sweeter as you share them with your wife! Good thinking, Ryu-kun!"

Large bed? Sweet wine? Chocolates?

"Oh, and we believe you'll find the private bath to your liking! We have scrubbed it to be especially clean for you!"

Sorry, Sakura, my private bath awaits.

I finger-gunned my way out of the room, reaching Kakashi and graciously waving at Naruto and the remaining poor souls staying in their 'cosy' abode. Gotta love that Kakashi is a man of few words ready to let people assume what they want from the little he gives them.

"Hey wait, she's not his wife!"

I swear to all that is holy, had Naruto not said that with a pure intention to help clear up the misunderstanding, I would've suffocated him right then and there.

I smiled innocently at the owners. They weren't amused.

"Hokage-sama, we have to ask – is she your wife? Our esteemed establishment has a reputation to uphold, we can't just let anyone stay in our most luxurious room!"

Darn it, I was so close to actually relaxing during this vacation! But my future was so predictably bleak right now it passed before my eyes like a series of war flashbacks. I could already see myself wrestling with Sakura for the best corner in the room, or entering into a staring contest with Sasuke because there is nothing else to do, or trying not to have a mental breakdown when Sai comes up with a new nickname for me and accidentally chooses to focus on one of my insecurities, or spend five excruciating, sleepless nights fighting down the urge to try and find a door frame to stand below to shield my body from what seems to be a level 6 earthquake, but is only my teammate's (a precious teammate, I had to remind myself, one I should definitely refrain from killing) relentless snoring.

"We are together."

WHAT!?

Thank Kami everyone was looking at Kakashi in disbelief so I had time to regain the control of my expression and make it seem like I totally knew we were together as well. I mean, we technically were together. Together with everyone in front of the room I'll probably enter in the future only to gloat.

"We apologise for doubting your wife, Hokage-sama! But was it not one of your own ninjas who suggested such a preposterous idea? You should consider reprimanding him!"

They kept talking and walking and apologising to us intermittently as they led us further down the hallway. I followed them in a daze, not believing my luck. Being still loosely attached to Kakashi's forearm I decided some show of gratitude is in order.

I pulled at his arm until he took it out of his pocket and then entwined our fingers together. I was blushing furiously but at least I was holding his hand! Which is a huge win I would say. Also shows that I'll do anything necessary to get him that second vacation. Given sufficient amount of time to adjust, of course.

His grip slightly tightened in understanding but his expression remained professional. Thankfully, that wasn't enough to jump-start my overactive imagination. If he, for example, had smiled kindly at me as I gave him my hand, or bumped our foreheads as he was wont to do, or, haha, imagine if he had taken my hand and gently raised it to kiss it with closed eyes, and then if he had given me a half-lidded look underneath his lashes, one of those that made it seem like he adored my entire being and acted like we were the only people in the world–

"Hokage-sama, is your wife okay? She looks like she'll faint. Oh! She's getting redder by the minute!"

How does that jutsu go again? The one that makes the earth swallow you?

"She's just tired from the road. If you don't mind, we would like to rest now. I'm guessing this is our room?" Kakashi pulled me along, positioning himself to shield me from the owners' curious stares.

The owners kept apologising for keeping us and bowing in unison, until they finally closed the door of our room behind them. As soon as they (finally) left and we could hear the sound of their footsteps growing fainter in the distance, I used my sensing technique to check for possible threats and quickly surveyed the area for any irregularities before approaching Kakashi again, now more composed.

"Kami, that was awkward. Thanks for the save, babe."

Kakashi responded with a charming smile and by bumping our foreheads together. "Anything for my lovely wife."

I was K.O.-ed on the floor for the next hour and a half.

"Mizu-chan!"

I turned around to see Naruto happily running towards me in his underwear.

"Um, Naruto-chan, where are your clothes?"

"Oh, you don't need clothes in an onsen, Mizu-chan! I'm actually overdressed!" he said, proudly. Dear lord, if Kushina was alive now, she would have grounded him for eternity.

"What's up?" I decided to change the subject.

"Oh, I was just talking to Kurama– oh, Kurama is my Bijuu, remember? That's his name-dattebayo! Everyone just kept calling him the Nine Tails and no one even asked if he had a name! All the other Bijuu have names as well! Oh, I actually wrote a song about it to help remember all the names, since there are nine Bijuu and nine jinchūriki so it's hard to remember them all! Do you want to hear it? I call it the Tailed Beasts Counting Song! It goes like this: Hitotsu, hito yori inemuri–"

"Naruto-chan! Did you have something to tell me?" I had to stop him now before that catchy song gets stuck in my head. Sure, I could've relied on the Zeigarnik Effect to make it stop in theory, but I was a bit dubious when it came to the trick's effectiveness. I mean, the idea behind the Effect is that you will better remember those tasks that you stopped in the middle of doing, but it was never suggested that you will also more easily forget the task that you finished doing. Furthermore, the research on the Zeigarnik effect was done in a school setting, meaning it wasn't actually proven to work in everyday usage. Also some studies that attempted to get the same results failed to do so, so it is a really controversial topic. Oh, was Naruto talking this entire time?

"...something about puppies, I wasn't really listening, but he said to back off, so I guess I could do that for you if you're really interested?"

Oh, no! I missed important information about puppies!

"What about puppies? Did you see puppies here? You shouldn't hide them from me, Naruto-chan, I thought we were friends," I was ugly-wailing at this point.

He blinked a few times: "I think he was talking about your puppies, though."

He completely lost me now. Was someone planning on giving me puppies?

I was scowling trying to connect the information I had available until Naruto started pouting. "Mizu-chan, Kurama-baka said you weren't listening to me just now! Is that true?"

Oh, dang, Kurama telling Naruto obvious things happening around him actually explains why Naruto was less oblivious lately. Okay, so Kurama was saying something about my puppies whose existence would require Naruto to back off if I'm truly interested in having them? But I still wasn't sure about the identity of the puppy-giver. Let's see, who had a possibly steady supply of puppies?

Okay, either someone from the Inuzuka clan or Kakashi, obviously. Oh, I should catch up with Hana, maybe she's the one who...wait...had Naruto been talking again?

"...so I have a lot of great ideas, and I have them all the time! But I was really surprised today when Sai came to me with a decent idea for a prank! He suggested messing with Sasuke-kun's towel when we go to the bath!" Naruto started cackling delightfully.

I pulled my yukata more tightly around my body, warning him not to get any weird ideas, and he actually noticed (or Kurama did).

"Don't be silly, Mizu-chan, you're a girl. Girls are supposed to wear yukatas in here at all times, even I know that."

I gave him a Drew Scanlon look and started untying my obi to show him what I thought of that sexist spiel he tried to sell me. It was really funny how he turned completely white in a matter of a second.

He tried keeping the two ends of my obi together, but then realised he might be touching me inappropriately so he was just flailing between keeping me fully covered and avoiding to touch me at all, and it seemed like he had an intense inner battle. I guess Kurama was giving him too many mixed messages.

"What is going on here?"

We froze.

Turning our heads towards the voice, we saw a horrified expression of the owner (Hanako-san, was it?). She marched towards us and pushed Naruto away.

"You should be ashamed of yourself, young man! That is the Hokage-sama's wife you are manhandling! I swear, I will personally disclose everything that happened here to the Hokage-sama himself! This is a highly-esteemed establishment, and we don't look kindly at assault. Especially at assault of our honoured guests!"

She continued yelling close to my ear, and I was at my limit. I used the body replacement technique to switch myself with some random girl standing nearby, and I noticed Naruto doing the same a second later.

We were hiding in the nearby bushes trying to hold in our laughter for the next half an hour.