Chapter 45

She would have thought she could have made better traveling by herself. There was less to pack up in the morning, less to do at night. As it turned out, having her mother walking beside her had given her an extra pep as they walked the miles. Someone to talk to made it go by faster. Now, with nothing but the sound of her feet against the road, her pack felt twice as heavy and the way twice as long. Walking endlessly by herself, she realized that this was the first time she was truly alone. In the Fire Nation she had always had others around her. Then she had had her 'friends' Mai and Tylee. There had been soldiers she commanded and servants. Even at the care home there were always other people around. Here on the road to Ba Sing Se, she was alone. It reminded her of the day of the comet and unnerved her terribly. At night, lying beneath the stars and trying to sleep, every snapped twig or animal call made her flinch.

After almost two weeks Azula felt close to another mental break, this time from the silence. There were no cruel visions or voices in her head this time but she still felt like she was losing it. She had taken to talking to herself as she walked. Sometimes she tried to practice small talk and nice things to say to sad people. Most of the time she imagined all the different ways the conversation might go when she finally reached Ba Sing Se. Sometimes Zuko sicked his wife on her and she froze all the blood in her veins and killed her before she had said a word. Others felt more realistic but they were less entertaining to contemplate. Most often she tried to practice what to say when she finally saw them.

Should she play to his soft side and come off overly sad and remorseful? It might work for half a second before he remembered who he was talking to and how prone to deceit she was. She 'always lied' after all. Then she remembered how she had felt after trying to manipulate King Bumi that way. She was working so hard to become a better person, why should she throw it all away like that? Falling back on old habits, especially when it wasn't likely to help her seemed like a poor plan. Once she had decided to be as honest as possible and hope for the best, she spent an entire day thinking of exactly what to say. If she caught him alone or with Uncle Iroh it would be easier to get the words out before the threats started. If he was with his wife and their friends she would have to be fast. She prayed their child wasn't around, she doubted she would even have time to say hello if it was.

Setting up her camp for the night, Azula sat on her bed roll and wished desperately for someone to talk to. Anyone at all would do. Strangely, there had been almost no one on the road with her. She had thought she would have ran into more travelers the closer she got to Ba Sing Se considering how many people flocked there seeking refuge from the war. There had been the odd person here or there, but no one had seemed overly interested in talking to her once they realized she had the social skills of an angry hog monkey. She tried, but being nice to strangers and coming up with small talk when they had absolutely nothing in common was completely beyond her. By now though, she would be happy to follow along and listen to other people prattle on about anything. Even cabbages!

Just as she had fished a few handfuls of fruit from her pack to have with the bird she had cooked over her fire, the bushes beside her began to rustle. Azula froze with the berries halfway to her mouth and slowly turned her head to look wide eyed at the offending bush. Nothing happened for long enough that she began to berate herself for being startled by nothing when suddenly the bush shook again. Two large yellow eyes peered out from beneath the foliage and glared at the fruit in her hand. A low trilling sound was all the warning she had before a blur of white and brown fur dove out from the bush and tackled her. She was too shocked to even bend. The handful of berries she had were deftly wrested from her before the long tailed creature darted back to the safety of the bush.

"Hey! You fuzzy thief, those were mine! How dare you steal from me, do you have any idea who I am?" She lit a small ball of flame and tried to look menacingly at the bushes around her. There was no more movement or noise so she assumed the creature had ran off with its prize. After one last huff in its general direction, Azula turned back to her fire and plucked the bird from the stick she'd stuck it on to cook. As she tore into it, she thought more about what had just happened. That angry fuzz ball had been vaguely familiar. Something about the noise it had made and the coloring and its tail pricked the edges of her memory. Where had she seen something like that before?

She was so wrapped up in that line of thought, she didn't notice the rest of her berries were about to be pilfered until the animal she now instantly recognized was reaching into her lap.

"YOU! No wait! Here!" For some reason she couldn't name, she was holding several berries out to the flying lemur in an attempt to draw him back. "Come on you furry little berry thief, that's it…" She wished she could think of his name. He was always flying around the Avatar and his friends, one of his companions from the air temple like the great bison. Slowly and with his weary eyes locked on hers, he reached out and snached them from her hand. "There, see I can be nice." She took another bite of her bird as she watched him munch on the berries. When he finished she handed him more which he took without hesitation this time. "What are you doing out here anyways? We're hundreds of miles south of where father defeated your friend."

He gave a sad sort of chatter and reached for another berry. Why was he here? Surely the Avatar's other friends would have looked for him. Wouldn't they?

"Why would they just leave you behind? Maybe they were too scared after the Avatar died and they forgot about you. That sounds like something they'd do." The lemur trilled angrily at her as if chastising her for deriding his friends. She rolled her eyes. "Oh fine, they were probably really, really scared and couldn't go back for you. I'm sure they miss you terribly." A long oscillating series of chirps and trills as if he were trying to speak actual words came as a reply. Azula stared at him, as though she could understand if only she concentrated enough.

When he quieted and reached for the last of her berries, Azula had a sudden epiphany. She fixed the animal with a calculating gaze.

"If you come with me, I can take you to your friends. I'm already going to Ba Sing Se anyway and that's probably where they all are." He clocked his head as if listening and didn't look away as he chewed slowly. "You know, the bushy haired girl that plays in the water, the dirt covered blind girl, the boomerang freak and my dumb brother." He chirped. "This could benefit both of us. You could get back to them and they might be more willing to not kill me if I have you with me. What do you think?"

He stared at her for a long moment before turning around and darting into the bushes. Well damn. Azula was surprised at how much it stung to watch him go. Biting the inside of her cheek to suppress her sudden swell of emotions, she glared down at her fire. Stupid, big eared, freak. She didn't need him anyway. Maybe she could tell them where she'd seen him and they could look for him themselves. Huffing as she swallowed the last of her meal, she didn't think that was likely.

She was just shoving her pack over to use as a pillow when the bushes shook and twigs snapped. He was back. Shocked, she watched him as he picked his way to her bedroll. There was something in his mouth. When he stopped and perched on her legs, she could see it was a small carved animal of some sort.

"I thought you'd run off. What do ya have there?"

The lemur plucked it from his mouth and cradled it in his hands, holding it up to his chest. He trilled softly and held it up for her inspection. It was a carved bison, whistle? A small piece of torn orange fabric was tied around its middle. Azula realized with a gasp that it must have belonged to the Avatar. He always wore the orange robes of a monk and the whistle probably had something to do with the flying bison.

"You miss them huh?"

He was nuzzling against the whistle now and chirp-talking again. She recalled Yun Sui mentioning that the bison had died when the Avatar had. This little flying lemur had somehow survived more than a year on his own. Watching him, she thought she should say something. Maybe she should practice the empathy her mother was always trying to explain. He couldn't really understand so he wouldn't care if she was awkward.

"I am sorry your friends are dead. I don't have any friends. I have to find my brother. I'm hoping I can make him trust me enough to let me help him kill our father, that's the man that killed your friends… If you come with me it might make that easier. I don't know how much help I'll be to him but I doubt he can do it on his own."

He gave her another long look that made her wonder how much he actually understood. After apparently reaching a decision, he hopped past her to curl up on her pack. She glared at him. Well it wasn't like she needed a pillow to sleep.

Sighing dramatically, she flopped down on her bedroll beside him. They still had two weeks of walking ahead of them. The thought made her tired all over again. She rolled around a bit to get comfortable and closed her eyes. A small smile curved her lips as she fell asleep too. She might still be ages from Ba Sing Se, but now she wouldn't be alone.

A/N We're almost to Ba Sing Se! And we found Momo! Hope everyone had a good 4th of July yesterday, my family had a great time despite how many bug bites I now have. Ah summer.

Have a great weekend, we finally see Zuko again on Tuesday!