Chapter 54
Azula felt as though she had been trampled by a moose lion. Her whole body ached, her head more than anything. Groaning as she regained full consciousness, bright light had her squeezing her eyes shut again. She reached up to prod the left side of her brow where the pain seemed to be coming from but froze when she realized she had no idea where she was. Blinking slowly, she squinted around the room. There was too much natural light to be her dark cell. That also ruled out having been left for dead in the tunnels. To her right was a row of small windows, gauzy curtains that reminded her of the care home but for their green color stirred in a cool breeze. Beside the bed was a large basin of water and a wooden stool.
Her breathing picked up as she began to panic. A sharp pain lanced through her middle as she tried to sit up. Her accompanying hiss of pain drew the attention of a guest she hadn't known was there. Steady hands were suddenly supporting her and helping her to a more comfortable position. Someone muttering in her ear, 'Easy, easy..' Letting out a long breath once she was finally settled, she turned to her left. Zuko looked terrible. His hair was loose around his face and he had dark smudges beneath his good eye. When their eyes met, he gave her a small pained smile.
"Hey."
She could only mumble something unintelligible in reply. Her mouth was dry and her throat felt tight. He poured her some water from a pitcher beside him and helped her drink before he spoke.
"You've been asleep for two days. Katara has been in to heal you a few times, but you were so badly injured it's taken her a while. How are you feeling? Should I get her? She said you might be in some pain when you woke."
Azula nodded absently but reached out for him as he made to stand. When she tried to speak again, her voice came out in a dry rasp.
"Wait… wait. She… Katara has been healing me? But I thought, what happ…" She suddenly remembered why she had been down in the tunnels to begin with. "Is Kya ok?"
Zuko's face grew guarded and there was a pause before he nodded. "She's fine. We've been staying here at the palace again. The lower ring doesn't feel safe anymore and we're leaving soon anyway. Plus, it's easier to heal you if Katara is close by."
Azula relaxed back into the pillows and sighed, watching her brother shift uncomfortably from the corner of her eye.
"Azula, I wanted to say… well… If you and Sokka hadn't intercepted the Dai Lee when you did we may not have caught up to them in time. It would have been nearly impossible to catch them if they had made it past the outer wall and we never would have been able to find them so fast if it wasn't for you." Frowning, Zuko and ran a hand through his hair and seemed unsure of what to say. He gave her a long, contemplative look. "I'm not sorry I didn't trust you. You have never, not once in our lives given me a reason to. Especially not now that I have more than ever to lose. But, like I said if it wasn't for you we might not have gotten Kya back. Normally I'd be inclined to think you only helped to further some plot but, you almost died. Katara said if she hadn't healed your internal organs right away you wouldn't have made it back to the palace."
He sighed and reached forward to take her hand where it lay on the bed beside her. "What I'm trying to say is, thank you Azula. I don't know why, but you risked your life to save my daughter. I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust you completely, there's just so much history of betrayal there, but thank you. No matter what your personal motives might be, I owe you my daughter's life. I have no doubt that father would have…" Azula winced as he was momentarily overcome by his emotions. His eyes squeezed shut and his lips pressed in a tight line. "Well, anyway thank you. I should get Katara."
Azula blinked back an annoying burning in her eyes and called after her brother as he stood to leave a second time. The first few words came out in a nervous rush.
"I know you don't believe me but I don't have any ulterior motives this time. Well, unless you count helping you kill father and keeping Kya safe from him because she's my niece and I don't want that bastard getting anywhere near her." She blinked rapidly again and looked away from him. "I told you before that the reason I want to deal with our father so badly is because of Sozin, our half brother. Spending so much time with mother and working through lots of… uncomfortable trama stuff has me feeling all kinds of things I used to ignore. Like how desperately I wish we could have had a different childhood. Maybe if we had been raised by normal people instead of a sociopath we could have been friends." Keeping her eyes on the windows and letting out a shaky breath, Azula pushed on in a near whisper. "I wish we could trust each other. I wish we loved each other. I wish we had a normal relationship and someday I could teach my niece how to bend lightning and tell her all kinds of embarrassing stories about her dad."
She turned back to look at him. Zuko was facing the door a few feet from the bed and when she paused he looked back at her.
"I wish I didn't have to almost die for us to have a civil conversation. Look Zuko, I know you probably won't ever really trust me, but I want you to know I am sorry for well, basically our entire relationship until now. I'm so relieved that I was right when I chose the tunnel I did to look for the Dai Lee and I want you to know that I would have died to save Kya. You don't have to thank me Zuko. You're my family and mother says a family is supposed to protect and support one another. I think, I'd like for her to be right."
Zuko was still frowning, but his eyes were as wet as hers were now. Azula didn't want him to cry, she was giving it everything she had to keep her own tears in check as it was. This conversation was already almost too much for her to handle.
"Azula I…"
"Go get your wife Zuko. She was right, there is a lot of pain."
He blinked away his confusion at her sudden subject change and the lingering wetness in his eyes and gave her a lopsided smile.
"Ok, Azula."
She allowed herself a small smile as he left. They wouldn't ever have a normal relationship, but maybe they could have something.
oOoOoOoOoOo
Katara had woken early that morning. Not that she had slept well to begin with. It helped that they were staying at the palace, but even the added security it provided couldn't ease her anxiety. They had come so close to losing Kya. Worse, she owed her daughters safe return to someone she considered an enemy. Azula had tried to kill her and her friends on multiple occasions and she was notoriously manipulative and dishonest. That made it all the more confusing that she had almost died saving Kya.
After a light breakfast she headed to Azula's room. Kya was playing with Sokka and Toph, and she knew the firebender would need another healing session soon. It had been two days since the fight with the Dai Lee and Azula still hadn't woken. Her injuries had been severe and even with Katara and Sitka's combined efforts it would take time for her to be fully healed. As she walked down the high stone hall, she hoped Azula wouldn't be in too much pain if she woke before she got to her. That thought stopped her in her tracks for a moment as she was once again faced with the fact that she was caring for a former enemy. What would Aang say?
Her footsteps were slower as her mind wandered. When he had fought Ozai, he had faced his foe with compassion for his humanity. It had ultimately gotten him killed but then again, Ozai hadn't been trying to help them. She remembered what he had said when she had gone to find the man responsible for her mother's death. Then too he had stressed forgiveness and compassion. If he were here, would he trust Azula? He had been able to forgive Zuko so much easier than she had. They had gradually formed a bond of friendship as strong as any of them and Zuko had spent more than a year chasing them around the world intent on capturing the Avatar. Was Azula any different really?
Voices snapped her from her thoughtful daze as she approached Azula's door. Her hand on the handle, she paused to listen. From the sound of it, Zuko was thanking her for helping to save Kya. When he had finished speaking, Katara made to push the door open but Azula's voice made her stop again. She pressed her ear to the door, her eyes wide at what she was hearing. A short lifetime filled with regrets and a sacred sibling bond destroyed by a father's hatred and manipulation. It was sad really; Katara's eyes filled as she listened to Azula's words. She thought about her relationship with her own brother and how precious that bond was to her. It was impossible to imagine what her life would have been like if Hakoda had raised Sokka and herself to hate one another.
Suddenly Zuko's footsteps were moving towards her and Katara jumped back from the door as if it had bitten her. Even though they were married, his conversation with Azula had sounded private. Being caught eavesdropping was not how she wanted to start the day. Thankfully she had backed several feet down the hall by the time he opened the door.
"Oh, morning Katara. I was just coming to find you."
His genuine smile when he saw her settled the rioting nerves she'd felt all morning and she reached up on her toes to kiss him.
"Good morning, my love. We woke early and I figured your sister might need me. I thought I heard voices just now, is she awake?"
He slid one hand around her waist, the other cupped her face as he kissed her back before answering.
"Yes. You were right about her being in pain. She's never been one to appear weak so I have no idea how bad it is but she asked for me to find you." Katara nodded and gave his chest a pat before stepping around him. "Will you need anything? I can stay if you want…"
"No, I'll be ok Zuko." She gave him an encouraging smile. "Kya is with Toph and Sokka, so you could find your Uncle. I am sure he would like to know Azula is awake."
His frown only lasted a moment before he smiled at her again and nodded as he turned down the hall. Once he was out of sight, Katara took a deep breath, steeling herself, and opened the door. Azula was facing the windows and didn't show any sign that she had heard her enter. There was a small smile on her face but her eyes were far away. It wasn't until she had walked around to the far side of the bed that Azula looked at her. Her apprehension was evident but besides gripping the blankets a little tighter, she didn't move.
"Good morning Azula."
"That was fast. Zuko only just left to find you."
Katara huffed a nervous laugh and looked away.
"Well I was already on my way here. I didn't know if you'd be awake but I had wanted to get here early just in case you were." There was an awkward pause in which both women stared at one another. "So, Zuko said you are in pain? I was able to knit your ribs back together, you had broken six of them, but there is still tissue damage around them and the injured organs will probably require more work too…"
Azula looked like she was as uncomfortable as Katara felt, it had been so much easier to heal her when she was still unconscious. Finally she nodded and spoke.
"My whole body aches, but my chest and stomach are the worst. If I try to move it feels like I'm being stabbed all over here." She gestured to her side and where Katara knew her worst damage had been. "And my head feels like it's been split in half."
Katara nodded and forced a tight smile as she moved to stand beside the bed. She pulled water from the large basin and brought it to her hands and reached over Azula's chest.
"Well, lets see what I can do about that. This will repair more of the damage, but I brought something Sitka, a friend who has also been helping to heal you, made up for you. It will help with the pain. From what Sokka has said I understand that it tastes terrible. It helps though."
She closed her eyes and focused. The water around her hands glowed as she moved it along Azula's injuries. All of the bones were mended and the organs were whole again, the remaining tissue damage was much easier to repair. Azula let out a long hiss as she knit muscle and tendon back to her ribs. Peeking up at her patient, Katara gave her a sympathetic look.
"Sorry, I know this part hurts. It's a good thing you weren't conscious for the worst of it honestly. This skill is almost miraculous in how it allows for such fast and accurate healing but regrowing flesh and attaching ligaments is painful when it happens so suddenly."
Azula didn't respond but her labored breathing told Katara she was doing her best not to show how much it hurt. She finished her work in silence, pausing only to reach for fresh water. Not for the first time, Katara found herself thankful that such intense healing required her to close her eyes in concentration. Feeling Azula's eyes on her was bad enough, having to see her watching her as she worked would have been unnerving.
It took nearly an hour before she was satisfied, having taken a break halfway through to give Azula a moment from the pain. Tomorrow, she thought, she could focus on the inflammation that would no doubt plague the new tissue. Now that everything was finally put back together she would try to decrease pain. Watching her one time enemy sigh in relief, she decided she owed her that much. No matter what she had done in the past she had saved Kya. That meant more to Katara than she could say. Sitting back onto the stool, she ran her hands down her tense thighs and tried to decide what to say next. Azula spoke before she could manage it.
"Thanks. For doing that. I must admit, I was surprised when Zuko told me you were using your healing powers on me. I guess I thought you might have preferred to leave me in the tunnels."
Guilt twisted her gut. Katara knew if anyone had asked her three days ago, she would have done just that. Now she felt ashamed to have ever been capable of it. Thoughts of the bloodbending she'd done only added to the shame. At this point she wasn't sure if she was any better than Azula ever was.
"Of course I'm healing you. You saved my daughter." She straightened and looked into her eyes. "Thank you for that Azula. I have my baby back because of you. This is the least I could do." With another tight smile, she stood to leave. "I should go, I'm sure Kya is hungry." As she walked around the bed toward the door, Katara remembered the last thing Azula had said to Zuko. Thinking of Aang, she decided to take a chance and spun around.
"Azula, no matter what your history is, you are Zuko's sister, and I'm his wife. That makes us family. Unless you give us reason to doubt you again, that means something. If you need anything, just send someone to find me."
Her parting words spoken, Katara left to find the rest of her family.