"Why don't we say we just slow down and talk this thing through?."
"I'm sorry, but there's no 'talking this thing through', Samuel," I muttered, my hands holding onto the table, trying desperately to stop them shaking.
I can't believe this was happening again. Even though it's been a couple of years since we defeated Azazel, he would still swoop in and haunt my dreams from time to time.
That bastard had taken everything from me, stopped me and my brothers from having simple, normal lives. Hell, Sammy would probably be married to Jessica, one or two kids running about the place. And Dean would probably be with Lisa and Ben.
Me?. I honestly don't know. Maybe I would be with John even though his life is far from normal. But would that have meant I never found Castiel?. It was getting harder to stop myself from thinking about him and those haunting, electric eyes.
Could this truly be my chance to stop him, to change all our lives?. Is this why Castiel sent me back here?.
"You said it was a demon, right?. None of us have heard of a demon with yellow eyes," Samuel said, making me look up at him from the map I'd been studying.
"Yeah, well, I have. This thing killed my family."
"Just calm down."
"NO!. Look...you don't get it. We're all in danger. The best thing you can do right now is get some place safe."
"Not until we know what we're dealing with here."
"Samuel's right. It could be a demon, shapeshifter, any number of things," Deanna said, walking over to us.
"I know what this thing is. And I'm gonna kill it. That's all the talking I need," I said, letting go of the table, crossing my arms over my chest.
"You're gonna kill a demon?. How?," Samuel frowned.
"With this," I explained, my hand moving to my waist, pulling out the knife I'd used putting the witnesses to rest back at Bobby's place.
"I don't get it. How does one little knife kill a demon exactly?."
"You wouldn't believe me if I told you. Just...trust me, it will work."
"All right, say that it does. You got some kind of crystal ball telling you where this demon's gonna be?."
"Yeah, maybe I do," I nodded, putting the knife back in the sheath around my waist, walking over to my jacket, pulling out dad's journal, starting to flick through it.
"What's this?."
"It's a list. My dad wrote down anyone he thought came into contact with the yellow-eyed demon. Who, where and when."
"Why?."
"Because the more he could learn about the son-of-a-bitch, the more he could figure out why he killed my mom. Look. Whitshire farm. I told you that name sounded familiar," I said, my finger landing on the right page.
"Whitshire farm?. That was two days ago. How the hell is that on your dad's list?."
"Umm...My dad could kind of see the future. Look at this. He's gonna hit here tomorrow night."
"Liddy Walsh?."
"Haleyville. That's close."
"Well, yeah, it's about three miles, but..."
"I know you guys think I'm crazy," I sighed, closing the journal.
"You seem like a really nice kid, Alex. But, yeah, you're crazy."
"Maybe. But I know where this bastard's gonna be and I'm gonna stop it. Once and for all."
-x-
"Hey, umm, I'm heading off. I just wanted to say bye," I smiled walking into the living room seeing Mary sat by the stereo looking through a pile of records, her looking up at me.
"Really?. So soon?," she smiled, getting up.
"Yeah, well, job to do. I...I wanted to tell you...you know, for what it's worth...doesn't matter what your dad thinks. I really like that John kid."
"You do?."
"Yeah. Yeah, I think you two are meant to be. Hell, I'm depending on it."
"What?."
"Nothing. Can I ask you a question?. What's he like?. John?."
"Why do you ask?."
"Just curious," I shrugged walking over to her, both of us sitting down.
"I don't know. He's sweet. Kind. Even after the war, after everything...he still believes in happily-ever-after, you know?. He's everything a hunter isn't. Can I tell you something?."
"You can tell me anything."
"He's gonna ask me to marry him. Tomorrow, I think. Dad's gonna explode. But I don't care. I'll run away if I have to. I just...I love John, and..."
"And what?."
"I wanna get out. This job, this life...I hate it. I want a family. I wanna be safe. You know, the worst thing I can think of, the very worst thing, is for my children to be raised into this like I was. Well, I won't let that happen."
"Yeah," I whispered, looking down, my hand moving to my mouth, trying hard to keep myself from breaking down just about succeeding.
"Hey. Are you okay?," she asked softly, her hand moving to cover mine, squeezing it gently.
"Y...yeah. No, I'm fine. Can I...tell you something?. Even if it sounds batshit crazy?. Will you promise me that you'll remember?."
"Okay."
"On November 2nd, 1983...don't get out of bed. No matter what you hear or what you see...promise me that you won't get out of bed."
-x-x
"Dammit," I muttered, pulling the car over to the side of the road, my hands moving from the steering wheel to my face, unable to stop the tears from finally breaking free.
Even though I'd pleaded with Mary not to go into that nursery on that night, I'm afraid my words will ultimately be forgotten and she will still die, that I will still lose her.
"Why did you have to bring me back, Cas?. Why couldn't it have been Dean?. Is God my co-pilot, is that it?. Well, you're a regular Chatty Cathy," I said irritably dropping my hands turning to the passenger seat having already sensed his presence before seeing him. "Tell me something. Sam and Dean would've wanted in on this. Why bring me back and not them?."
"You had to do this alone, Alexandra," he stated making me sigh.
"And you don't care that they're both tearing up the future looking for me right now?."
"They're not looking for you."
"All right, if I do this, then the family curse breaks, right?. Mom and dad live happily ever after...and me and my brothers grow up living happy, normal lives?."
"You realise, if you do alter the future...you, your father, Sam, Dean, you'll never become hunters...and all those people you saved, they'll die."
"I realise."
"And you don't care?."
"How can you ask me that?. Of course I care. I care a lot. But these are my parents. I'm not gonna let them die again. I can't. Not if I can stop it."
I let out a heavy sigh watching him disappear, his words still weighing heavy on me like the anchor of a ship.
I feel exactly like that anchor right now, tossed into an ocean, the waters representing my emotions. Am I really strong enough, brave enough to do this knowing if I succeeded then my life would never be the same, knowing I could possibly lose my blue-eyed saviour. But I have to try even knowing it would cost me everything.
-x-x-x
The knife Alex has will be explained in a later chapter. I am thinking about doing a few flashback chapters involving earlier episodes. I have something pretty interesting in mind for when I move into 'The Rapture' and 'On the head of a pin.' Thanks again for all the support!!.