Chapter 2 kicked by butt, I know where I am trying to get to but my muse forced me to take about a million different routes until I found one that I was happy with. This one sets the scene for what is going to be a really interesting time for our favourite duo.
Thank you for the lovely comments on chapter one. I'm really intrigued to see what you think of this one.
"Jack, are you listening?"
Jack turns to Daniel; His blank expression is enough of an answer for the archaeologist.
"What?" he asks with a slight hint of an apology in his voice.
"I was just saying that General Hammond is going to be really happy about this," he holds up a large leaf, waving it around. The leaf has proven to help skin to heal quicker after an injury. "Might get Kinsey off our backs for a little while," Daniel shrugs.
"I hate that guy," Jack murmurs.
They are hours away from gating home and Jack is antsy. It's a short mission, just forty-eight hours but he wants to get back to check on Carter. He'd been as patient as he can, but he is ready to see her, he's spent the last two days thinking about the moment that they had shared in the infirmary. She'd held his hand, wrapped her fingers around his and tightened her grip. She never touches him like that, never.
He's glad the mission is a simple one, some last minute negotiations before a trade deal that Daniel is leading. He's been preoccupied the entire time, wondering what he should say when he next sees her, if he should say anything at all. She had shut down straight after their forced confessions, insisting that they left everything in the room and acting like the perfect subordinate. He knows why, he understands that even a hint of any inappropriate behaviour with a superior officer can destroy a career, so he did the right thing and followed her lead. He would never, ever want to jeopardise her career but if she's ready to think about facing thing thing between the two of them after the year from hell then he is as well.
Jack hadn't had the chance to speak to her since that moment that Ambassador Faxon had interrupted them, he'd been called to see Hammond and reminded about the mission for the following day. He'd tried to drop in on her before he left but Daniel had ruined his chances with a last-minute addition to their pre-mission briefing.
He wants to know what she's thinking, why she'd held his hand and what it could mean. Although he'll never admit it to anyone, he's nervous.
He checks his watch again, three hours, just three hours until he can see her.
-SJ-
Jack strides to the infirmary, ignoring Daniel's comments about never having seen him so keen to go to a post mission check-up. He's trying to play it cool, but he needs to see her, to be near her. He doesn't fully understand why, after a year of holding himself together, it suddenly feels so much harder to keep his feelings under wrap. Could it really be down to the fact that they'd held hands for a few seconds?
He steps into the infirmary and freezes for just a second as he sees her, she sat at Faxon's bedside and she's laughing at something that he's just said, really laughing. It takes her a few seconds to notice that he and SG1 are even in the room.
"Oh, Colonel O'Neill, Dr Jackson, Teal'c." Joe Faxon notices them before she does but as soon as he speaks, she turns to them.
"Carter how are you feeling?" he asks, watching as a soft smile forms on her lips. "You look better."
"I feel better, Sir, thank you. Janet says I should be able to go home tomorrow."
"And what about you Ambassador?" Daniel asks, turning his attention to the man in the bed.
"Uh, still a little sore. Can you believe I got to thirty-five without ever breaking a bone?"
Jack looks at the man, thirty-five? He's younger than Daniel?
"Wish I could say the same," Jack offers with a shrug.
"How you people do this every day astounds me," he turns to Sam, "although Sam assures me that they aren't all as dangerous as the one I went on."
Jack can't help but flinch at the ambassadors use of her first name. He hides it well, sure that no one noticed. What is it about this guy that is making him feel uneasy? Probably that he's working on behalf of Kinsey, that's it, he's sure.
"Ahhh, SG1."
"D'oh," Jack mumbles as Dr Frasier approaches them.
"Who's first?" she asks, checking Ambassador Faxon's notes briefly.
"That would be me," Daniel offers.
"Great, and Teal'c, Nurse Michaels can see you now. Colonel O'Neill, are you happy to wait for ten minutes?
"Ecstatic," he smirks, edging towards Sam as she stands and heads towards her bed, climbing into it slowly, careful not to jar her arm.
"Ambassador Faxon are you ready for some more pain meds?" he hears Janet ask as she pulls the curtain between the two beds.
"You sure you're okay?" Jack asks Sam quietly, watching as she nods. She still looks pale and he watches as tries to hide a wince when pain shoots through her collar bone.
"The pain is getting better," she tells him as he digs his hands into his pockets. "How was the mission?"
"Oh, you know, the usual. Daniel talked for about six hours straight while Teal'c and I tried to stay awake, you really missed out."
"Sounds like it."
After a moment of silence, they both speak.
"Look Carter-"
"Sir I-" she offers a gentle smile and allows him to continue.
"SG1 are on downtime for a few days, I thought that you might need a ride home tomorrow?" he watches as her eyes widen slightly before she meets his stare. They both know exactly what he's suggesting, that they take whatever it is between them out of that damn room. That for once they have an honest conversation about what is going on between them.
Sam takes a moment to think about what that could mean. Maybe a conversation could help them? Maybe talking about these feelings could mean that they can work through them and go back to their light, fun friendship.
But what if it means more? What if a conversation leads to more than just talking? Her heart starts to race.
Part of her thinks that she should thank him but lie and say Janet is bringing her home, but then she thinks back to the feeling of his fingers laced with hers just a few days ago. She had instigated that. She knows how much it would have taken for him to take this step and she isn't going to turn away from him, not now.
"Uh, that would be nice, thank you Sir."
"No problem. I'll be here at one?"
"Sure, I'll be ready."
-SJ-
Jack is in the locker room about to reach for his coat when Daniel walks in.
"Hey," Jack starts, "what took you so long down there?" Daniel was checked before him but had only just emerged from the infirmary.
"Oh, I got talking to Ambassador Faxon. Talking about how successful our mission had been today, he seemed pleased."
"Oh, good." Jack can't quite shake a little voice in the back of his head that tells him not to trust Faxon, but he can't quite figure out why, the man has been nothing but honest and up front.
"He uh, he was asking if we manage to maintain relationships outside of the SGC, I got the feeling he was trying to figure out if Sam was seeing anyone." Daniel watches as Jack stills for just a second.
"Oh," is all Jack says, his unease around Faxon suddenly making sense.
"Is she?" Daniel asks slowly, bracing himself. He knows better than to speak to Jack about this kind of thing.
"How would I know?" Jack asks, doing his very best to act as though he isn't interested in this topic of conversation. He doesn't dare look at Daniel, the younger man can read him like a book.
"Well I just thought…" Daniel trails off, he isn't quite sure what he thinks. He knows that there is some sort of unspoken "thing" between Sam and Jack, but he doesn't know if he's suggesting that their "thing" has turned into something physical or if he's just checking how Jack would feel about the potential of Sam being pursued by someone else. He can never tell with the two of them. "Never mind."
"Night Daniel." Jack is gone before Daniel can respond.
-SJ-
Jack is surprised by the knock on his door just after 9pm. He thinks for a second that it could be her, that maybe she got out of the infirmary early and has made her way straight to him.
He stills as he opens the door to reveal General Hammond.
"Hi Jack, can I come in?"
"Uh, yes Sir. Is everything okay?" he asks as Hammond steps into his living room. The older man doesn't respond. "Beer?" Jack asks.
"No thanks, why don't you sit down." Jack does as he's told, trying to calm the nerves building in the pit of his stomach. Has something happened to one of his team?
"Sir, you're kind of worrying me here-"
"Your team are okay Jack," Hammond tells him, watching as Jack's shoulders relax slightly. "But I thought it was better to come to you at home than call you into my office."
"Okay," Jack frowns, waiting to hear what his CO has to say.
"This is a conversation I didn't want to have with you but unfortunately I have no choice," he takes a deep breath. "I had a visit today from someone on the base who wanted to voice some…concerns about the relationship between you and Major Carter."
Just like that Jack feels his stomach drop. "Uh, I don't know what you-"
"Jack," Hammond cuts him off. "I know that the situation between the both of you is complicated and I've tried to stay out of it as much as I can, you haven't given me any reason to feel like I should be involved, but I can't ignore this."
"What exactly is the accusation Sir?" Jack asks, anger building. Who would go to Hammond about them? They haven't done anything…yet. He feels a twinge of guilt as he realises that this conversation might be very different if it were to happen 24 hours later.
"Nothing concrete, more of a feeling on their part. They reported seeing you and Major Carter holding hands in the infirmary a few days ago," he sees a flash of guilt across Jack's face and continues, "the rest is just that persons interpretation of moments between the both of you over the last few days."
"Sir-"
"Jack, I don't want you to say anything that will result in you being dishonest with me. I just need to remind you that as much as I admire you for the way that you have handled this situation up until now, there is a very valid reason why it had to be handled this way." He hates that he has to say this, but he knows that this is his only chance of getting the younger man to listen, to really listen. "Major Carter's potential is unlimited, and we both know that she will be the one who is the most impacted by any rumours or accusations. Her career won't recover from it."
Jack inhales, nodding. Part of him wants to claim innocence, to tell Hammond that he hasn't touched her, that he's spent the best part of a year wanting her but doing everything in his power to make sure no one else sees it. But the rest of him knows that he was planning on meeting her tomorrow to suggest starting to pursue something and that his outrage would be hypocritical.
"Nothing has happened." It's all he says, not wanting to lie to a man he respects.
"But?"
"But I don't know how much longer I can go on like this." He watches as Hammond nods and sighs. "I could retire." It's something he has been thinking about over the last few days, weeks, maybe months.
"We can't let that happen Jack, you're too valuable an asset. And we both know that even in that case Major Carter would still suffer the consequences, professionally." They both know of female officers who have had their careers ruined even when following the correct protocol in a situation like this.
"So, what happens now?" Jack asks, frustrated as he realises that Hammond is right.
"I have managed to convince the person who reported this that I would speak to you but that I was certain that it was all a misunderstanding. They have agreed to leave it with me."
Jack wants to find this person and kick the crap out of them.
"Thank you, Sir," he closes his eyes briefly, almost unable to believe that they are having this conversation. He takes a moment to remind himself how lucky he is, that another CO could have split them up long ago or would have demoted them right away after the report received today. It does little to take the sting out of the whole thing.
"I know how difficult this is for you, for you both. But I have to ask you to hold on."
"For how long?" Jack asks, knowing that there isn't an answer. Hammond doesn't respond. Jack sighs, wiping his hand across his face.
"Think about her in all of this Jack. Think of everything she can still do. And now think about what will happen to her if someone like Kinsey gets even a sniff of what was brought to me today." He knows that Jack has very little concern for himself, for his career. He hates having to be the person telling him this, from the second the allegation was made he was deeply troubled about how to deal with it.
He hates that he is here, having this conversation but this is the only way that he knows how to protect them. He has watched their relationship grow over the years and had thought about splitting them up numerous times, but they are at their best when they were together with Dr Jackson and Teal'c. He wouldn't risk splitting them and allowing the Goa'uld to conquer Earth.
In the last year there has been a shift between the two officers, starting with the Zatarc testing. He knows what each one confessed and has watched as they struggled, especially during the entity incident, to keep a lid on their feelings, to put the safety of the earth first. If George is honest with himself, he wants nothing more than to tell them that they had his blessing, that if they could be discreet it won't be an issue, but he can't. Kinsey has never had a closer eye on the SGC and would be delighted if he could take Jack down, the entire SGC down. George hates it, but knows that he must do this, he has to speak to Jack for the sake of the both of them for SG1 and for the safety of the world. It doesn't seem fair that two fine people should hold such a huge responsibility, but he'll be dammed if they lose their careers over something like this, not after giving so much of themselves to the SGC.
He had thought about speaking to them both, but he decided against it. He doesn't want to make it any more awkward for the pair of them. Besides, Jack is the commanding officer.
"Son, I'm not going to order you to do anything. I just want you to think really carefully about your next step." And with that, he stands and leaves.
-SJ-
Sam has barley slept. The pain killers that Janet had given her made her drowsy but there were too many things racing through her brain to allow her to give in to sleep. So here she is at 1pm, having had just a few hours sleep, sat in the infirmary, waiting for her CO to pick her up and take her home.
She can't stop thinking about the fact that between them they have allowed their situation to accidentally leave the room. She'd been in pain when she'd reached for his hand but that wasn't why she held onto it, she held onto it because there have been too many times when she has longed for his touch, too many times when she has been desperate to feel his hands on her or to put her hands on him and every time she's managed to stop herself. She's tired of pretending that she doesn't feel something for him. The last year has pushed her to her very limits and she really doesn't know if she can go on as she has been.
She's surprised that it was him who suggested what might happen tomorrow, but she's also relieved. She doesn't think she could have done it, she's spent too many nights analysing his actions and words over the last few months, wondering if he still felt what he admitted to in front of Anise.
She thinks about what might happen today, how things might have changed by the time the sun goes down and she's both excited and scared. She would never want to do anything to jeopardize her team, she loves them, and they are her family, but she knows that something has to change.
She has promised herself that she will be brave, that she'll be honest about everything that she has felt up until now, no hiding. He has taken the first step here, but she is more than ready to meet him half way. She tries not to think too hard about what that could mean for SG1 or for her career, she just wants to talk to him, to see where they stand and then she can think of everything else.
Her stomach flips as she hears footsteps approaching, she gently climbs off the bed, ready to greet him with a nervous smile as she wonders if he feels as nervous as she does. She takes a deep breath as the footsteps get closer and he enters the room.
"Hey Sam."
Her smile fades instantly as Daniel enters the infirmary. "Daniel, what are you doing here?"
"Jack said you needed a lift home? He said to tell you that something came up and he'll see you when you're back on active duty." He speaks without any understanding of the message that he has just delivered. "Do you want me to carry your bag?" he asks, reaching for the bag. He looks up at her when she doesn't respond, the colour has drained from her face. "Sam, are you okay?"
"Uh, yeah." She takes a deep breath, quickly recovering. "Sorry, just…pain," she gestures to her shoulder as he stares at her in concern. Again, she inhales deeply as the realisation of what has just happened sinks in.
He isn't coming.
Thank you for reading. I would love to know what you think.