Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stomach Ache
Chapter 7
What if Severus Snape thought he was Helping Harry all along?
By
Jason Richard
Warning: will be referencing information from the final book in the Harry Potter series. Major spoilers if you haven't read that far.
You've been warned.
While the idea of spending hours in classrooms having someone explain things to him had once sounded like the most boring thing in the world, taking classes about magic was an incredible experience. Learning about magical creatures, plants, and the various spells he would get to use was the exact opposite of boring. And of course being famous among the other students was pretty enjoyable too.
However, there was one class he found he was destined not to enjoy. That would be potions with Professor Severus Snape.
…
Snape paced back and forth in his office. This was it. His first class with the famous Harry Potter. He was dreading it. He'd seen the papers and knew the boy looked almost exactly like his father James Potter did at that age, and James Potter was a man Snape loathed.
Especially for stealing Lily from him.
Still, despite his looks, the boy was his beloved Lily's son too. He would try to look past everything for her sake.
So Snape strolled into the classroom giving his customary announcement, then turned and saw Harry Potter. He sneered. The boy looked exactly like his loathsome father, from the forehead to the chin, to that hair to the eyes…
No, Snape realized. Not the eyes. Those eyes...those vivid green eyes...those were Lily's eyes. Suddenly Snape couldn't bring himself to hate this boy...even if those eyes were attached to all that...James Potter.
Wait, thought Snape, if I picture it hard enough I can see those eyes without the rest of him. Yes, just a pair of vivid green eyes floating by themselves and looking right at me…is actually ten most terrifying image I've ever come up with. But...they're Lily's eyes so...I'll take it. Now, for what I've planned.
Meanwhile, Harry saw Snape go from sneering to faces he couldn't fathom in a matter of seconds and wondered what in the world was wrong with the man.
"Potter!" Snape said suddenly, making Harry Jump. "What would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood."
"I don't know sir," said Harry, rather frustrated that he should be asked this on the first day of class.
"Ooh! Ooh! I know!" said Hermione, her hand in the air.
"Very well," said Snape, trying to ignore the girl bouncing in her seat. "And where would you look if I tell you to find me a bezoar?"
Harry, "I don't…"
Hermione, "I do!"
Harry, "Shut up Hermione, you're making me look bad."
And Snape muttered, "Yes girl shut up, you're making him look bad."
Snape cleared his throat and said, "And finally, what is the difference between Monkshood and Wolfsbane?"
"How should I know any of this?" said Harry. "It's the first day of school for goodness sake! You haven't taught us anything! How would anyone know the answers already?"
Hermione, "I know."
Harry and Snape, "Shut up!"
And poor Hermione made a sad face.
Snape then cleared his throat and said, "Well, clearly fame isn't everything." Before explaining the answers to the questions.
Later after dismissing class, Snape was quite pleased with himself. Surely Harry will have learned a valuable lesson, that his fame won't be enough to get by at Hogwarts.
Why even the famous baby William the Infantile wasn't able to get by on his fame alone. And he successfully hexed a dragon as an infant the ultimate sleeping spell. Some debate whether or not this was intentional on the baby's part as that particular incantation does sound suspiciously like baby gibberish.
Regardless of anything else, Snape's surely this will deter Harry from abusing that fame, forcing him to rely on what Lily did. Hard work and determination.
But Harry, as he left the class, said to himself, "What a jerk. Fame isn't everything huh? I feel like abusing my fame just to spite him. Hey, you, do my homework for me and I'll give you my autograph."
Random kid, "Awesome!"