Clary and Simon talk about what they saw before Clary finds Jace storming out. They have a moment while Magnus and Alec heal. Enjoy. Please review.

Chapter Eleven.

Clarissa Adele Fairchild was a very concerned woman. She could practically feel how scared Jace was earlier. He would never want to admit that to her, being that he had only ever cried once since she had known him and she wondered if he would have admitted it if she asked him. But right now, this fear was something else entirely. It was not fear for himself or for Clary but fear for something that he did not do, fear for something that he possibly could have prevented if he would have known better. Fear for not being there for the one person that he is connected to more than anyone else. There are ways that Alec and Jace know each other that no one else could because they are inside each other's souls. It felt like a failure or a betrayal to himself that he did not realize the pain that Alec had been in most of his life. From the moment Jace had met Alec, he had respected the warrior. He always knew Alec was different. That first night when Jace had snuck downstairs to clean up his wounds and hide them from the institute, Alec had only ever wanted to help. The first moment their hands met there was a moment of total silence where they both stared and knew that something was different. Something was just right. And Jace never had to be alone again. But he had not realized that he left Alec alone in so much.

That pain was clear on his face tonight. Clary noticed all of it and she could not help but think that she wished she could be a fly on the wall so that she could hear the conversation happening between Alec and Jace right now. Surely Alec will forgive him but perhaps they need to heal together and perhaps that conversation is not for her at all.

But that's okay because she needs a different kind of comfort today. She needs her own parabatai. Clary knows the bond as well as anyone and she can feel how intense it gets when something is truly wrong with Simon. When she was in that horrible position, feeling all of that pain, what she could really feel worse than anything was the pain of her parabatai. It was excruciating and deep, which made it all the worse for the both of them.

After Max was lain down on the couch and Izzy and Simon gave each other a quick embrace and spoke quietly for a few moments, it was Clary who rushed over to him and wrapped him in a hug. It was a long and quiet hug filled with a need that they both felt for a long time. It was so intense that their runes were practically glowing as they healed together.

"We're okay," Simon muttered into her red hair that smelled clean and fresh to him. It made him smile, having her so close once again. It was Clary who pulled away just a little so that she could see his face but kept her hands on his arms, never wanting to break that bond again.

"I saw you," Clary managed to get out. "You forgot everything. I was talking to you and I could feel our rune start to fade. I felt you falter away from me. I could feel you forgetting me deep inside my body. It was horrible. Then I looked down and our rune was gone and so were you. I couldn't feel any of it anymore."

"I'm here," Simon mutters, taking her back in his arms again. He wraps his arms around her small frame and holds her tight the way he has done his entire life. But this time it is for her comfort. He did not dream of anything that had to do with their rune. He is not afraid of losing her that way because he knows he never will. What he was afraid of was far more complex, but he did not want to talk about. It was long gone now and to him it was not even real.

"It's over. That would never happen. Our rune is safe," he assures. "And so are we."

This is when the concern hits Clary hard. She hears a door close and then Jace runs from it, emerging like he's on fire and running in the direction toward the door. Clary gives Simon a squeeze before she runs after Jace. She finds him standing outside of the apartment with his back against the far wall, staring down at his feet.

"Hey," Clary says in a soft tone. Jace looks aloof as he stares, his shoulders hunched and his hands clenched at his sides. "What's going on? Did something happen?"

"No," Jace says. "I just need a second."

"Okay," Clary says in a calm voice. She reaches over and squeezes his hand but he does not look up to meet her gaze. He stares down as if he is very far away in another realm and yet he is right here with her.

"Jace, talk to me," she begs.

He stands up straight and looks down at her gaze but it's too clear that he is angry. She doesn't understand it a bit so she leans toward him, resting her hand on his but he remains unsteady and clearly uncomfortable. She thought the fear would be over but it's still just as strong as the moment that spell began.

"I can't," he says. "I can't tell you what I saw that has me…freaking out."

"You can," Clary assures, squeezing his hand.

Instead of talking or trying to explain, Jace reaches across the space between them and grabs her in his arms. He wraps her up close and they hold each other for a long time. She nuzzles her neck in the space between them and brushes her soft lips against his skin. Jace's arms are shaking when they go around her, squeezing her and holding her close. It's clear that whatever Jace saw is still bothering him.

"Is this because of Alec?" she asks.

He shakes his head against her but does not make any effort to separate. She does not move from him. Instead, she kisses his neck again and brushes her hand over his shoulders a few times.

"Tell me," she begs again.

"Do you want to be with me forever?" Jace asks against his shoulder.

"Yes, of course I do."

"Then why did you say no?"

Clary pulls away when she realizes what he is talking about. The engagement. The question. When he asked her…the panic and the unknown feeling in her gut. The feeling of not being ready, of not knowing if she was supposed to be ready. She takes a long breath and then pulls away from him.

"Was that what yours was about?" Clary asks.

"Not being with you forever. You not choosing me," Jace says in a nod as they look at each other now. "Then there was that nasty bit with my father—Valentine and the whole thing with watching my parabatai rune fade away. Then I received Max's death, which was fun. But yeah…mostly you."

"Jace, I will always choose you," she says with a sigh and reaches across the space between them to lock him in a long hug.

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