Thanks for the great response guys. I made this super cool Monopoly board game with all Shadowhunters/Mortal Instruments items and characters. It's so fun!

Anyway…Alec is still having trouble getting over the fear demon.

Chapter Fourteen.

Alexander Gideon Lightwood is a cautious young man. He has been cautious since he was young, first finding out that he had an inkling for boys when Izzy would catch him looking at her male posters in her room or even later when he found himself watching Jace. That was all in the past now but he still remains cautious in many ways. He still remains on edge when it comes to much of what he has been feeling this last day. Last night, he got almost no sleep at all. He was awoken by nightmare after nightmare. Eventually, he could not take it anymore and he came out to the couch to wait for the rest of his family to wake up. He hadn't been doing much. He had tried to read but it hurt his head so badly that he had to stop. He instead resorted to sitting on the couch and staring down at his large feet in nothing but his grey sweatpants. It was well past nine in the morning before the others got up.

Rafe was the first one to get up since he had been the least depleted after yesterday. He got up and came out with a small nod to his dad. He got some cereal and started eating right away, barely talking to Alec at all, which he did not think was odd. Rafe does not speak unless he really has something important to say. Otherwise, he is a kid of few words.

"Are you okay?" Alec asks.

Rafe gives a nod that lets him believe that his son is safe. It's over thirty minutes before Magnus is awake, walking over in nothing but his boxers and his robe to his lover. He leans down to kiss Alec on the forehead before sitting beside him, wrapping his arm around the tall man. The moment that Magnus has his arm around him, he tenses, trying to control the feeling in his chest that has been pushing on him.

"What's going on?" Magnus asks. Alec tries to muster up the best cautious smile that he can make out. He gives a very small nod toward his husband to try to make him understand that he might not be okay but he wants to be and he can be with time.

"Nothing," he says with a shake of his head. "Where's Max?"

"In the room. He's still asleep. I figured it best not to wake him given yesterdays turbulent events," Magnus offers with a flick of his fingers, flying blue magic sparks across the room.

"Probably," Alec agrees, grabbing Magnus's hand in a long squeeze. He leans back on the couch and closes his eyes, feeling Magnus beside him and his family around him. He thought that this would make him feel better. He thought that everything would go away if his family woke up and he was surrounded by them. But now he is with them and he feels just as scared as he did before. Magnus feels that shaking sense of unease surrounding the father of his children.

"Alexander," Magnus says, reaching across him to put his hand on his knee. He looks to his boyfriend but Alec does not open his eyes. His hands are shaking and his body is starting to feel very far away.

"Alec, what's wrong?" Magnus asks.

Alec shakes his head once more, unable to get the words out. Something is wrong. He is afraid. Terrified even. Alec hunches his body over, his head tucking between his knees as his long arms wrap around the back of his head. He is covered almost entirely by himself as his shoulders start to shake and Magnus realizes what is going on in some level.

"You're afraid," Magnus says. He reaches his hands across to Alec and uses the smallest amount of magic to feel that he still has some of that poison in his veins. "There is a bit of poison left. It's not much but it's enough that you're still feeling some of that fear, Alec. You need rest. You can sleep this off."

"I can't sleep, Magnus," Alec says into his knees. He can't manage to lift himself up, to look at his almost fiancé and tell him what is going on in his head. These last two days have been so dramatically terrible that he can't afford just one more embarrassing thing to happen to him. He can't handle it.

"My love," Magnus says, squeezing his hand a bit further. "You have to let me help you. I cannot use my magic but I can bring you to bed. I bet I can help you back to sleep again."

Alec shakes his head again, leaning it further down into his elbows as the fear gets worse. The fear starts to intensify in ways that he cannot describe. He bites his arm when he feels some fear coming onto him so strong that he can't hold back his noises. Magnus hears just the slightest whimper and grabs his lover around his shoulders, sharing some of their weight.

"Get Rafe out," Alec manages.

Magnus turns to his older son. All he has to do is give him a short nod in the direction of his bedroom for Rafe to get up with a quick eye roll and take his cereal bowl into his bedroom. Magnus wants to walk after him and tell him that everything is going to be fine but he doesn't want to leave Alec. He is so afraid.

"We have to get you into bed, Alexander. I think that will make you feel better," Magnus says again.

"No!" Alec shouts, shaking his head. He pushes Magnus off of him all at once and leans on the other side of the couch. He stares across at his lover unable to say anything.

"Alexander, what is going on?" Magnus asks.

Alec stutters over his words at first before he swallows, collecting himself and moving on to what he can get out of his jumbled brain.

"I don't know," Alec says. "I keep having these weird visions of people getting hurt. I don't want to be away from you but I'm afraid of being with you too."

"It's just the leftover poison. It will go away with time if you do not give into it," Magnus says.

Alec shakes his head and stands up, rushing out of the doors and out onto the balcony. He storms outside, slamming the doors closed behind him and then leaning across the brick wall with his elbows down. He tries to look down onto the streets below him but he can't think straight. All he can feel is pain and fear and confusion. Being near Magnus makes it feel better but being near him also makes him afraid that Magnus will feel that same fear too. He can't risk that.

"Alexander," Magnus says behind him. "I understand that you don't want me near you but you have to have someone. I am not just going to leave you alone."

"It has to be someone else," he says.

"Jace?"

"No!" Alec shouts. "He's too close to me. He can probably already feel this. It has to be someone that won't be able to share in my pain."

"Clary?" Magnus says, sounding confused but just trying to help his almost fiancé.

"Isabelle," Alec decides. "I need Izzy."