Harry Potter and the Poodle of Magic Alcatraz

Chapter 15

What if Something Goofy Happened?

I couldn't come up with a name for this chapter :(

By

Jason Richard

So Lupin levitated Snape, and they all walked out of the Shrieking Shack. Ron got his wand and kept his eye on Peter Pettigrew, seething hatred in his eyes. Peter's ex-wife, who had yet to volunteer her name, also glared at Pettigrew, while Hermione looked away from all of them, feeling confused about this whole situation.

Harry, meanwhile, began talking with Sirius.

"So," said Harry. "You knew my parents?"

"Yeah," said Sirius. "The four of us were thick as thieves. Though...that feels like forever ago. I...I don't know if anyone's told you but...Your parents made me your Godfather."

"I heard," said Harry. "And the answer is yes. I'd like to live with you."

"That was fast," said Sirius. "I didn't even get the chance to ask."

Harry turned, looked Sirius in the eye and said, "I want out of the Dursley house. Now."

"Well," said Sirius. "Okay then. Let's hope nothing disastrous happens within the next few minutes."

"Oh look," said Ron. "A full moon."

"Oh No!" said Hermione. "Something Disasterous!"

Harry and Sirius looked at Lupin, whose eyes were glazing over, and said, "Uh oh."

And Lupin began turning into a werewolf. His face elongated, fur began sprouting all over his body, his ears shifted to the top of his head and became pointy, he grew a tail and did other things that made him look like a wolf. His wizard robes ripped in a few places but otherwise stayed on him.

"Lupin!" cried Sirius.

"Ow!" cried Ron as Peter punched him and ran off. Harry pulled out his wand, but Peter turned into a ran and ran off.

"Peter Pettigrew!" cried the ex-wife. "Get back here you miserable little rat in every sense of the word!"

And she turned into a cat and ran after him. Harry would have chased after them both, but he found himself face to face with a werewolf.

"I'm going to kill that little rat in every sense of the word!" said Ron.

Harry: "Werewolf."

Ron whimpered, "Never mind. Let's run like the wind."

Hermione: "No! We can't! If we make sudden moves, he'll catch us! It read it in our assignment."

Ron: "Wow. I'm actually glad you're a total school obsessed nerd for once."

Hermione: "Harry, remind me to punch him when we aren't in danger anymore."

At that exact moment, Snape woke up and ran over to them, furious. For once his love of Harry's mother Lily didn't suppress the rage inside him.

"There you are Potter!" cried Snape.

Harry: "Werewolf."

Snape immediately put himself between the werewolf and the children.

Snape's mind: Not Harry!

Out loud: "Weasly! Use yourself as bait!"

Ron: "In your dreams Snape!"

Suddenly Sirius, as a poodle, ran in and leaped atop the werewolf, biting his ear. The small black dog did pretty well for a while but eventually got thrown away.

Sirius whimpered on the ground.

Ron: "Gee Harry, I guess when they were keeping Lupin in line your dad did the heavy lifting."

Sirius growled on the ground.

Suddenly, another wolf started howling, catching Lupin's attention.

Ron: "Does anyone else think that wolf sounds like Hermione?"

Hermione: "Why would a wolf sound like me?"

Ron: "Well, for a wolf it sounds like a know it all nerd who's obsessed with schoolwork."

Hermione: "Again, Harry, remind me to punch him when we get out of this."

And Lupin ran off. With that, Harry ran after a Sirius, who limped away in dog form. Snape called him back, but Harry ignored him.

He found Sirius Black at the shore of a lake, apparently injured. He ran to help him, but then suddenly felt a chill go down his spine.

He looked over and saw dementors...and hear heard Draco Malfoy's voice in his head.

Draco: "So, I ran into this stupid muggle."

Audience made up entirely of other Draco Malfoy's: "How stupid was he?!"

Draco: "He was so stupid he lived in a cave! Ha...ha...ha!"

And the Draco Malfoy audience laughed.

Harry: "Not now!"

The dementors came up, and suddenly Sirius cried out, "Noooooo! Not Lucius Malfoy doing standup!"

Harry: "I feel your pain!"

Harry pulled out his wand and said, "Expecto Patronum!"

And his wand gave a little white puff before fizzling out.

"Yeah," said Harry. "Didn't think that would work."

And then, the Dementors began to lift their hoods.

"No," said Sirius, terrified. "Not the dementor's kiss…"

They would suck out Sirius's soul by revealing their true form.

"No," said Harry weakly, the images of Draco doing stand up making him weaker by the minute.

Suddenly a flash of bright light burst through the woods, and a glowing deer bounded through the air, knocking the dementors away. After a few minutes, it cleared the forest of dementors. Just as Harry began to black out, he saw the glowing deer go up to someone who looked very familiar.

Dad...it was Harry's dad. It had to be. He looked just like Harry. More like Harry than even Harry expected. He was a little too short for a grown man, his eyes were green, and he had a lightning bolt shaped like just like Harry…but it had to be his dad.

Harry couldn't be in two places at once any more than Hermione could attend two classes at once. So silly!