House: Slytherin
Category: Short
Prompt: Guilt [Emotion]
Word Count: 1211
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She danced away from the jet of purple light, her heart in her throat as she watched Luna — her best friend Luna who she'd grown up with — be caught by one of Bellatrix's spells, a large gash appearing on her arm, blood spurting from the wound. The Dark witch cackled at the sight and began to press her advantage; however, Ginny snarled Stupefy!, missing Bellatrix by inches and making the witch turn to face her.
Ginny held Bellatrix's gaze, fear and adrenalin coursing through her, and the ever-present whispers of Tom suddenly growing louder and louder, just as it had in the Department of Mysteries. The whispers promised to teach her magic beyond compare and the secret to immortality; however, Ginny knew all they spoke of was Dark, Dark magic. She'd fallen under their spell before, but she wouldn't do so again. Never again.
She was so focused on ignoring Tom and glaring at Bellatrix that she almost didn't hear Hermione's shriek: "Ginny!"
A jet of poisonous green light was streaking toward her. She twisted desperately away from it, falling to avoid its deadly kiss by inches. Hermione raced to her side, wand drawn, already casting a Protego, but even in her terrified haze Ginny could tell the muggleborn witch was no match for Bellatrix.
Tom's whispers increased tenfold. Adrenaline still racing through her veins after that close brush with death, Ginny surrendered to the darkness within her. She lifted her wand, pointed it at Bellatrix, and, remembering everything Tom had taught her, she whispered in a shaky voice, "Av-Ava—"
But before she could finish those unforgivable words, her mother ran between her and Bellatrix, snarling, "Not my daughter, you bitch. Stupefy! Stupefy!" She dodged Bellatrix's answering spells, then continued, "Stupefy! Protego! Bombarda maxima! Stupefy!"
Ginny watched her mother duel Bellatrix, shaking as she realized what she had been on the verge of doing. Casting Avada Kedavra. Killing in cold blood, like any Dark witch. Like Bellatrix herself. She, Ginny Weasley, had almost cast the worst Unforgivable that existed.
She lay there trembling in her mother's shadow, watching the duel between the two witches. Finally, a spell normally to used to chop vegetables in a kitchen hit Bellatrix square on the chest, and the Dark witch fell.
As soon as Bellatrix had fallen, her mother rushed to her "Ginny!" she cried. "Are you okay?"
"I— I don't know," she choked out, her mind spinning. She almost killed Bellatrix, just as Bellatrix killed Sirius… "I— I just don't know."
"Then go inside immediately," her mother ordered. "It's not safe here."
Ginny didn't even protest; she was so stricken that she obeyed without question. Once within the relative safety of the Great Hall, the remainder of the battle passed in a blur as she helped Madam Pomfrey tend the wounded and struggled with her conscience. She almost killed Bellatrix. She almost committed cold-blooded murder. She almost cast Avada Kedavra, the Killing Curse.
It wasn't until Fred's cold, stiff body was carried in that she was jolted from her guilt-ridden thoughts.
"No!" she shouted, racing to his body. "Fred! No!"
As she knelt beside him, holding his cold hand, her mother tried to embrace her, but Ginny pushed her away. She was unworthy. She should have died in his place. Fred was too full of light and life to die, but she— she almost cast Avada Kedavra. "Please," she murmured, "you didn't deserve this— you could never have deserved this, Fred—" She sighed, then added so quietly that no one else would hear, "I did."
Ginny remained at her brother's side throughout the remainder of the Battle. It wasn't until Harry entered the hall and placed a supportive hand on the small of her back that she allowed herself to be moved from Fred's side. He led her away from Hogwarts, away from the wreckage of the battle, away from the dead.
When they finally reached the silent forest, she muttered, unable to meet his eyes, "I'm Dark. I almost killed Bellatrix Lestrange."
Harry stopped short. "You're not a Dark witch, Ginny," he said firmly, taking hold of both her shoulders and trying to look into her eyes. "Ginny, you didn't do anything."
"But I was about to," she mumbled, lifting her face to finally meet his gaze. She knew her tears were slowly streaking through the dust and dirt coating her cheeks, but Harry looked worse: his clothes, ripped and ragged, were coated in blood, of which Ginny knew was not all his; and where his shirt flapped open, she could see a circular purple burn over his heart. The war had scarred all of them. Some on the outside, some on the inside. Tom had left his mark.
Reminded of her guilt, Ginny hung her head again. "And isn't it intent that matters?" she asked quietly. "It's not what happens, what's on the surface. It's— it's what's inside. And Tom's still in there." She burst into empty tears, too overwrought to truly cry.
Harry stood before her, suddenly uncertain, his hands stuck awkwardly in his pockets. Finally, he ran a hand through his messy hair and hugged her. "Ginny, it's okay, I promise you, I promise you, that Tom is gone."
"I— I know," she hiccoughed. "But— but I'm afraid I can still feel him and I think these— these terrible thoughts, Harry— what if it was never Tom? What if it was all me? And I wanted to murder Bellatrix. I almost cast," she lowered her voice, "I almost cast an Avada Kedavra. And I would have, too, if mum hadn't shown up. Don't you understand?"
Harry pulled her closer, resting her head on his chest. "I do, Ginny," he replied thickly. "Believe me, I do."
"But how?" She reached up to brush back his hair, revealing his scar. "You're Harry Potter, the Chosen One, the Boy-Who-Lived, the Savior of the Wizarding World."
Harry chuckled, catching her hand and shaking his head. His hair fell over his scar again, hiding it. "Everyone has a Darker side, Ginny," he replied. "Even me. Those titles mean nothing."
"When?" she challenged.
"Many, many times," he answered. "When I broke into Gringotts, I used the Imperius Curse on a goblin. When Sirius died, I cast a Crucio on Bellatrix. It didn't work, but the intent was there." He sighed. "I've struggled, Ginny. I've made bad decisions."
Ginny gave a small smile at that. "And it's what makes you human." Standing on tiptoe, she pressed a soft kiss to his lips. "Thank you, Harry."
Harry smiled. "No problem, Ginny. Now, you ready to rebuild the Wizarding World? Be leaders of the Light? Keep each other from the Dark?"
Ginny grinned in return. "Together, we can do anything." She squeezed Harry's hand. "I love you, Harry."
"I love you too, Ginny," Harry replied, squeezing her hand back. "There's a new world waiting for us, and together, we can do anything. Now, let's get back before everyone starts worrying."
Ginny chuckled, and hand in hand the two returned to Hogwarts, where a new life awaited each of them.
