Bio Profile: The Damned 33rd
The 33rd Mobile Infantry Battalion, also known as 'The Damned 33rd', had been in existence since the 1st World War, where it participated in the 2nd Battle of the Somme, and earning its first battle honors. It further saw action in World War II where, contrary to the popular news reports, it was the 33rd that broke the siege of Bastogne, and paved the way for General Patton's 3rd Armored Division to turn the tide in the Battle of the Bulge. It was rumored that General von Lüttwitz, when he heard of the successful breaking of the siege, cursed the luck of the Americans and "those damned 33rd," earning the Damned 33rd its nickname.
The 33rd continued to see action in Korea, Vietnam and even in the 80's with the Cold War. But it was during Operation Enduring Freedom and Operation Iraqi Freedom where the 'Damned 33rd' became the most decorated unit during the War on Terror. During the Coalition's occupation of Iraq the 33rd provided relief and support to the Marine contingent which was tasked with retaking Fallujah in April of 2004. During that battle, which would have otherwise resulting in an operational failure and black eye for the Coalition Forces, the 'Damned 33rd' once again helped turn the tide of battle, earning the battalion a whopping 134 battle honors.
In Afghanistan the 'Damned 33rd' was no less distinguished. In March of 2005 during the 1st Siege of Kabul, Konrad helped rescue a platoon of Special Forces operators stranded outside the city and cut off. Braving incoming enemy fire, then LTC Konrad led elements of the 33rd on a rescue mission and helped evacuate the surviving soldiers, Konrad also personally carried three badly wounded operators, including then 2nd Lt. Martin Walker, to an evac chopper. He would later go on to receive the Congressional Medal of Honor for it.
The 'Damned 33rd' would also undergo another significant change in late 2005, when an IED attack and insurgent ambush almost decimated the 33rd's command squad. Col. Harvie, then commander of the 33rd, was killed outright when his HUMVEE transport was targeted by several RPG's. Several key company commanders were also seriously injured in the attack, but LTC Konrad once again rallied the survivors and they routed the attackers, then withdrew, leaving no one behind. For his bravery Konrad was awarded the Distinguished Service Cross, a Purple Heart, and a promotion to Colonel as well as command of the 'Damned 33rd'.
After the 2008 election John Kerry was elected president, and in late 2009 the President made good on his campaign promises of withdrawing troops from Iraq and Afghanistan. Things took a turn for the worst in Afghanistan in 2010 and 2011 as the enemy saw an opportunity and took it. As the troops withdrew from various provinces, the Taliban-backed Islamic Caliphate slowly took over. In December of 2011, mere weeks after most major combat operations were suspended and FOB's were closed, the insurgents led their own surge, taking over vast swaths of Afghanistan, the Afghan National Army either withdrew, or worse, deserted and joined the insurgency.
Kabul held out, mostly because of the local forces being bolstered by the 'Damned 33rd', but eventually even they had to evacuate Afghanistan under orders in early January of 2012. Colonel Konrad felt personally responsible for the loss of Kabul, and felt it was a black mark on the 'Damned 33rd's reputation. When the 33rd was re-routed to Dubai because of the sandstorms, Konrad saw an opportunity, in saving the abandoned civilian population he felt that this a chance at redemption, for him and the 33rd. Sadly, it turned out to be his and the 33rd's damnation, and ultimate destruction at the hands of Captain Martin Walker in late June of 2012.
Units within the Damned 33rd:
The 33rd was revolutionary within the U.S. Army as being a 'combined' battalion, comprised of infantry, mechanized and air units:
Headquarters Company (Exiles)- the staff and support element for the rest of the unit. Includes the 33rd's senior leadership, logistics, operations, planning, intelligence, and communications cells, liaisons, HUMINT and CI teams, mechanics, and other miscellaneous troops. 170 men. Almost all of Captain John Foley's men join the mutiny, including most of the senior staff. The loss of the unit's command and support structure left Konrad and The Damned reeling in the first months of the Mutiny.
Alpha Company (Damned)- standard motorized rifle company, 180 soldiers. The vast bulk of Alpha Company remained loyal to Konrad.
Bravo Company (Exiles)- Large motorized rifle company, includes the Ground Contingent headquarters, HUMINT, and recon teams. 250 soldiers. Captain Ivan Wright's men, hit hard during the failed Evac, allied with Long from the beginning.
Charlie Company (Split)- mortar, anti-air, and anti-tank weapons company. 120 soldiers. About half of Charlie's soldiers and equipment go to each side during the Mutiny.
Hotel Company (Damned) - specializes in air assault tactics. 160 soldiers. With some notable exceptions, Hotel Company stayed loyal to Konrad.
India Company (Exiles) - standard motorized rifle company, 180 soldiers. Captain George Glynn and almost his entire company are among the first to join the Mutiny.
Juliet Company (Split) - Snipers, Intelligence, Forward Observers, and long range surveillance. The smallest company at only 80 soldiers. Juliet split 60-40 in favor of The Damned.
Kilo Company (Damned) - specialized in air assault tactics, same as Hotel. 150 soldiers. Bill Pilton's men sparked the Mutiny with their attack on the Exiles at the airport, and were slaughtered nearly to a man. After the Mutiny remnants of Kilo were folded into Alpha.
65th Filed Medical Company (Split) - attached to the 33rd out of Joint Base Lewis-McChord. 130 soldiers, split in flavor of the Exiles.
Delta Company (Split) - Home of the 33rd's Black Hawk helicopters, the aviation contingent headquarters, and the aviation mechanics and maintenance group. 26 helicopters, 315 soldiers. Split in favor of the Damned.
Echo Company (Split) - Echo Company's 18 AH-6A Little Bird gunships provide the 33rd with their most potent offensive punch. 140 soldiers. Split in favor of the Damned.
Fox Company (Split) - The smallest of the aviation companies, Fox has 6 OH-58 Kiowa recon helicopters and 4 IMH-6 Little Birds, equipped for surveillance and intelligence collection. A SIGINT team and analytical cell are also organic. 90 soldiers. Split nearly down the middle.
Factions of the 33rd during the Mutiny:
"The Exiles" - The faction of the 33rd that turned against Colonel John Konrad. Led by Battalion XO, Lieutenant Colonel David Long. At their peak, the Exiles comprised a little more than a third of the 33rd's total strength. The Exiles manage to capture about half of Dubai in the early months of the Mutiny, but suffered a devastating defeat while attempting to capture the city's water supply at the Aquatic Colosseum. They were driven back and took refuge at Dubai International Airport, where they fought the final battle with the Damned and lost. Those Exiles not killed in battle or rounded up and executed soon after scatter and flee into the surrounding desert.
"The Damned" - The part of the unit that remains loyal to battalion commander, Colonel John Konrad. The Damned comprised about 2/3 of the 33rd's total remaining strength. After suffering a series of early disasters, the Damned rally and take back much of the territory they lost in the early months of the Mutiny. An attempt by the Exiles to capture the city's water supply is beaten back with terrible losses to both sides, but the Damned are able to use their superior numbers and air capabilities to overwhelm the remaining Exiles at the airport. After the end of the Mutiny, the execution of the surviving Exile leaders, and Konrad's suicide, the remnants of the Damned are formed into something resembling a cohesive unit by Major Gavin and the Battalion Sergeant Major Wolfe.
AN: I had meant to get the Damned 33rd's bio out earlier, but it was a victim of my chromebook's untimely death a few chapters back. Long story short, I was able to retrieve it on a portable hard drive, and put it back together. I hope the bio profiles aren't too much of a distraction...
Well, I hoped to have this out earlier this week, as an April Fool's joke, but the joke was on me...work got busy and life went crazy. Hopefully all you find this story as entertaining to read as I do writing it. As before I did rush this out, so I would like to apologize for any grammatical errors, blah-blah-blah, you know the drill. Now we get to see this mission from a different perspective, as well as seeing the after-effects of all the havoc the Exiles have caused in Agabrah...Enjoy!)
"Please, your majesty, we must hurry!"
The princess had paused in the street, looking back in the direction where the young thief and the odd foreigner had fled. She then turned her attention back to Fareed, the Captain of the Royal Guards, who was trying to urge her on, as respectfully as possible. Her gaze fell on several of the Royal Guards who were limping and supporting one another. They were wounded by the giaour's profane weapon, apparently it was akin to a crossbow but shot small projectiles capable of penetrating any armor. Her thoughts went back to the foreigner named Torrez, who just earlier was so friendly to her and Aladdin, and wondered how such a person could be capable of such cruelty.
Her musings were interrupted by Fareed's words reaching her ears.
"...Princess, it isn't safe on the streets anymore..."
She looked up at the Captain of the Guard, the massive man's swarthy brow was beaded with sweat, and his dark features pale with fear.
"...the City Guards are scattered or dead at the hands of those invading giaours, if any brigands or criminals find out that royalty is out in the open..."
He stopped and shuddered.
"I know that the boy meant something to you, but-"
Fareed was cut short by the princess's dismissive wave of her hand.
"That street rat is nothing to me, Captain. I thought he was different, a diamond in the rough, but the fact that he lusts for gold and consorts with invading foreigners means he's no better than any common brigand..."
One of the still unwounded Guards approached.
"This street is clear, if we continue it will lead us to the Palace!"
Fareed nodded, and escorted the princess, as the remainder of his contingent formed up the rear guard. As they made their way through the deserted street, the ground rumbled as a loud explosion rocked the city. Fareed and the princess turned, in the distance they saw a large cloud black smoke billowing from the city's center. Then, something caught the Captain's eye, and one of his subordinates shouted.
"Allah save us! It's the Ḍaḥḥāk!"
The Captain of the Royal Guards stared in the direction that his subordinate was pointing. Through the haze of the smoke he could make out a shape, something hovering over the the rooftops. As the smoke cleared and his vision focused, the head guard's blood froze. It was most certainly a dragon, or some sort of flying demon, it had a wide grey body that ended in a blunt snout, and a long tail. Fire spewed from the creature, and in its wake more explosions blossomed outwards, creating more clouds of choking black smoke.
These giaours weren't just invaders, Fareed thought, they must be devil-worshippers and necromancers to be able to summon such fell creatures. He nodded to his point guard.
"Hurry! These foreigners are not to be trifled with."
His second-in-command, Hamid, spoke as they crossed another deserted.
"It's a shame. I kind of liked the giaour named Torrez."
He saw the dirty look his Captain was giving him and shrugged.
"What? He was a funny man, I find it hard to believe he was an evil man or a sorcerer."
Hamid yelped as he felt a large hand cuff the back of his head. He rubbed the sore spot and glanced up at his captain, who was glaring down at him.
"Be silent, fool, or I'll put an arrow in your knee!"
The guard had another wisecrack on the tip of his tongue when he heard a chocked scream. Fareed instinctively pulled the princess behind him, and Hamid drew his sword. Both saw the lead guard crumple to the ground, dead from two arrow bolts to the neck. Several heavily armed men, wearing similar armor to the Royal Guards own, but without any livery, appeared out of side streets. The Captain of the Guards turned, and saw that more men advanced from behind. Two of his wounded guards were already cut down. He looked down at his charge, the princess, who was staring in wide-eyed fright.
"When I tell you, you must run, and run as fast as you can. Do you understand?"
The princess began to speak.
"But what about you-"
Breaking decorum and taboos, he took the princess by her shoulders and shoved her towards an empty alleyway.
"Run! Run like the Prince of Demons were after you! I will be along shortly, after I deal with this rabble!"
As Fareed drew his own massive sword, he glared at his attackers.
"Have at you, cowardly fools! I'll send you all to hell today, courtesy of my blade!"
For all of his outwards bravado, the Captain of the Guards feared for the safety of the princess, and inwardly he prayed fervently.
"Lord...please hear the prayers and supplications of your most humble servant whom I confess is not the most devout...please safeguard the princess, send an angel to save her!"
(At that very moment)
"Roger that, as soon as these guys are toast I will exfil to the rally point..."
(BGM: SO:TL OST, Downed Plane)
PFC Gobbi had just finished copying down the coordinates for the extract point from Lt. Bradley. The private had 'appeared' in Agabrah just a few minutes earlier, and just in time, as his fellow 33rd soldiers were pinned down in the streets below.
His point of arrival was a rooftop overlooking a large group of crossbowmen and heavily armed guards that were advancing on a wrecked HUMVEE. It took Gobbi a few minutes to realize that there were no satellite dishes are powerlines crisscrossing the streets. It reminded him enough of Iraq, but then he saw the crossbowmen and took cover on the roof.
He fired off several rounds from his M4, taking out two of the crossbowmen. The element of surprise was gone, and the remaining half-dozen janissaries turned their crossbows at Gobbi, who was forced again to take cover. The private dropped his empty magazine and reloaded, waited until all six arrows whistled overhead. Then he switched his selector to full auto and blind-fired. He couldn't see what if his bullets hit their mark, but was rewarded by several cries of pain.
Gobbi glanced out of cover, seeing the crossbowmen scattering in confusion, then took the initiative and vaulted over the low wall. He sprinted and took cover at the far edge of the roof, now less than a dozen yards from the surviving enemy soldiers. He reloaded, and ducked as more arrows sailed by, one glancing off his Kevlar helmet. The private heard a feminine cry for help, and looked down.
In the streets he saw a young woman in a traveling cloak running, with several rough-looking and heavily armed men chasing her.
Well, this is a no-brainer, Gobbi thought to himself. He looked back up and saw the crossbowmen were gone, either dead or already fled. He looked back down and saw the woman had turned down an alleyway with a dead-end, and was cornered. The thugs had reached the entrance of the alleyway. Gobbi saw the largest one, who looked to be the leader, give an evil leering grin and advanced on the trapped girl. Seeing as he only had seconds to react, the private raised his M4 and took aim at the bad guy.
The princess was trapped, she knew now that it was folly to leave the safety and security of the Palace, and now she was going to pay for her folly. Seeing the looks the wicked men were giving her, she shuddered to think what sort of ghastly treatment she would receive in their clutches. Their leader advanced on her, giving her a lecherous grin.
"Our master paid us much gold to retrieve you, princess, but fortunately for us he didn't say anything about what sort of shape you were to be handed over in..."
He glanced back at his comrades.
"We'll all have a bit of sport with our little street mouse before handing her over to the Master..."
The other rough men laughed, but their mirth was cut short by the sound of a loud crack that echoed in the narrow alleyway. The leader looked shocked as he stared at a red circle in his breastplate, then a second crack caused his head to explode, and his lifeless corpse collapsed to the ground. Another crack echoed out, and another man fell, and with that his comrades took cover. One of them shouted out.
"It's one of the giaours! Stay out of sight, or their thunder weapons will kill you on sight!"
The surviving men cowered down, hiding behind low walls, alcoves and even piles of trash. Their quarry, the princess, was still standing in the open, but she was not the target. One of the attackers started backing away, trying to slowly make his way to the streets and escape. Unbeknownst to him, a figure dropped down from the roofs behind him. The man sensed something amiss, and turned, only to see the butt of an M4 assault rifle coming at his face.
Gobbi clubbed the first baddie, rewarded with the wet crunching noise of the man's nose breaking, causing the man to collapse. But the soldier had no time to savor his kill, there were still three more tangos in the alleyway. Fortunately for the girl, her attackers were now more interested in self-preservation than her. She was rooted to the spot, staring at Gobbi in fear, and honestly the private didn't blame her. He was fully kitted out and wearing his helmet, his face covered by the skull balaclava theat the leader of Zulu Squad had given him.
The remaining hired mercenaries were petrified with fear. Their attacker was most certainly one of the giaours, his clothes and armor matched the description of the survivors who had recounted their botched attack on the foreigners in the city market. This one brandished his thunder weapon, his own face concealed behind a scarf that was woven to look like a human skull, giving the farangī a terrifying appearance.
The private took advantage of the enemy's moment of hesitation, and fired off two quick bursts. Two more fell, but the last one pulled out a short, wicked-looking dagger and grabbed the girl. Holding the knife at her throat, the man shouted out.
"No closer! Or I'll-I'll kill her!"
Gobbi still had his M4 trained on the final thug, then remembered what Merlin told him. Right, think out outside the box, he thought.
The thug watched as the giaour paused. Clearly his threat to the princess's life had at least given the infidel pause, and his hopes soared as he saw the foreigner hold up a gloved hand, and lowered his weapon.
The private slowly and deliberately put his M4 down, leaning it up against the wall. He had discretely put the safety on, just in case the thug or one of his other compatriots would make an attempt to grab it. Besides, Gobbi still had his M9 as backup. He reacted up and undid the clasp on the chin-strap of his helmet. He pulled off his helmet and slowly made his way towards the thug, still gesturing in a placating manner with his free hand.
"Easy does it, man...you don't wanna hurt her, right?"
Gobbi could see the man's grip on the knife relax fractionally. Good, he thought to himself, this could work. The private continued to close the distance, still talking.
"Alright buddy, just release her and you're free to go."
Hope dawned in the thug's eyes, and as if to make his point the private stepped off to the side, giving the man an opening. The thug's eyes darted at Gobbi, then back to the alleyway and the deserted street beyond, then back. The private could see that the man was torn between his desire to avenge his comrades, and his cowardly desire to save his own skin.
Finally the thug sprang into action, shoving aside the girl and lunged at Gobbi with his knife. Gobbi parried the man's clumsy stabbing attack with his helmet, then punched the man in the face. Dazed, the thug turned and made a half-hearted slashing attempt, but the private was too quick, and clubbed him with his Kevlar. The lights went out, and the thug fell. The private leaned down to check the man's pulse, but left himself open to attack from one final assailant.
Gobbi felt a sharp pain in the back of his head, but before he could react he felt the world spin and go dark, then he collapsed to the ground. Behind him the princess held the remains of a ruined flower pot, she was still frightened and reacted more out of instinct than anything. It took her a full minute to realize that the giaour was probably trying to save her. She glanced down at the unconscious foreigner. He was dressed in the same odd clothing and armor as the one called Torrez.
Gingerly she poked the giaour with her foot. No response. She then crouched down and turned him over on his back. On his chest was the same sage-green cuirass, with the same odd pouches and pockets as Torrez. The foreigner's face was still concealed behind the fearsome face covering that was fashioned to look like a death's head. Curiosity got the better of the princess, and she reached out and pulled down the scarf, revealing the giaour's face. The princess's breath caught in her throat, he was just a boy! She had expected an older man like Torrez, or else some ferocious bearded barbarian. Not a smooth-faced boy.
Her staring was cut short as there was a loud crackling noise, and a voice emanated from the boy's armored vest.
"Gobbi this is Misfit- I mean this is Lt. Bradley, we are in the air and en route to the rally point, what is your sitch?"
It gave the princess the second shock of her life, but then she remembered that the same style of voice came from Torrez when she and the street rat were confronted in his hideout. As if on cue, the same voice hissed again.
"Gobbi, this is Lt. Bradley callsign Misfit One Actual, how copy?"
It must be some form of scrying communication, she thought to herself. Her thoughts were interrupted as she heard shouts echoing from the street.
"This way! Hurry!"
She stood up, but her fear gave way to relief as she saw two familiar figures running from the street into the alleyway. Her captain of the Royal Guards, Fareed, and his lieutenant had caught up to her. Fareed had a few superficial cuts, but appeared none the worse for the wear. His large, bearded face creased into a look of relief and joy as he saw his charge unharmed.
"Allah be praised, you are safe!"
He came up and drew short of embracing her, instead he knelt down in front of her.
"It gladdens me to see you unharmed, your majesty!"
As he knelt Fareed saw the unconscious giaour at the princess's feet. A dark look crossed the captain's face, and he stood up.
"I should have known that these foreigners were behind your kidnapping..."
He drew his sword.
"I'll have my vengeance, with your permission, your majesty..."
Quickly he drew himself up to his full height, readying the killing blow.
"Stop!"
The princess's outburst shocked both Fareed and his lieutenant. The captain slowly lowered his blade, his gaze alternating between his charge and the unconscious foreigner lying on the ground.
"B-but, your majesty! These men are dangerous!"
The princess shook her head. Truth be told, she had shocked herself by her response.
"This one was not part of the thugs that were trying to kidnap me."
Her gaze fell on the giaour's face.
"He saved me, and risked his life..."
She directed her attention to Fareed and squared her shoulders.
"You will not harm him, by order of me, the Princess!"
"Momma! Lookit!"
Her mother was sitting on the couch by the Christmas tree, and smiled.
"What is it, Zellie?"
The 3 year old girl, still dressed in her pajamas, had just opened a brightly colored box with air holes in it, revealing a small, furry bundle. The toddler held up a cute, meowing kitten.
"Kitty!"
The girl's father, who was sitting next to her mother grinned.
"That lil' fella sounds hungry, Zelli..."
Pete Gobbi glanced back at the small dining/kitchen area that was adjacent to their living room.
"Why don't you let Daddy feed him an' you go finish your breakfast sweetie?"
Zellie ran up to her dad and hugged him.
"Daddy is the best!"
Gobbi gently took the kitten from his baby girl and watched as she scampered off to her place at the table. The private leaned over and kissed his wife.
"Thanks for makin' it happen on such short notice, babe."
His wife returned the kiss, then gave her husband a sly smile.
"No problem, but you do realize you're the one who's gonna be taking care of that little furball, right?"
Gobbi grinned again as he held up the kitten.
"C'mon, Robert, you gonna take that lyin' down?"
He saw the look his wife was giving him.
"Really? You're naming our daughter's kitten after your battalion 1st sergeant?"
The private shrugged.
"Hey, it's a 33rd thing, babe..."
As if on cue the little kitten meowed, and started licking Gobbi's face. The private chuckled as the kitten's tongue rasped across his face. It felt odd, but for some reason Gobbi felt like the kitten's tongue was leaving a larger footprint than he thought.
Until he woke up, still feeling a tongue rasping across his face. Gobbi slowly opened his eyes, and saw a large, orange tiger licking his face. The private froze, not sure where he was. The tiger, for his part, seemed fairly intelligent, and nudged him. Gobbi took that as a sign that the large jungle cat didn't view him as an entree on the menu, and slowly sat up.
"Easy does it there, Tony the Tiger...easy..."
Another voice, this one distinctively feminine, spoke up.
"Ah, thou art awake."
Pete looked up and for the first time got a good look to his surroundings. He was in a large room that reminded him of some of the more opulent venues in Dubai, at least before the sandstorms had ravaged them. It was all polished marble floors, arched doorways filigreed in gold, heavy silk curtains and brightly-colored woven rugs. Then his gaze fell upon the voice's owner.
It was a girl perched on a satin pillow beside him. He recognized her as the girl that he rescued from the thugs, although before she was almost completely covered up in a dirty traveling cloak, now he finally got a good look at her. She was a teenager, with classic Middle-Eastern features; olive skin, an Aquiline nose, and large light brown eyes rimmed in khol. Her lips were glossed in a burgundy, that were parted slightly as she stared at him. She had raven black hair bound into long pony tail with several golden bands. Gobbi realized that he was still in his ACU's and armor, although his weapon was nowhere to be found.
The girl reached out and stroked his face, her crimson-painted fingernails grazed across his cheek. The private noticed her clothes, she was dressed in wispy thin clothing made of turquoise muslin. She leaned forward, revealing more of her figure that was appropriate for a girl of her age. As she drew closer Gobbi's nose was assaulted by the aroma of exotic spices and perfumes, her skin also seemed to glisten. He also saw that his M4 was laid out beside him.
Finally Gobbi found his voice.
"Uh...gonna ask a stupid question, but who are you, and where am I?"
The girl giggled.
"Oh my, where art my manners? Thou currently stand," she paused and giggled, "...or rather sit, in the presence of Princess Alyasimin Bin Harun al-Rashid, daughter of the Sultan Harun al-Rashid, the Just and Upright, Beloved by Allah and all, ruler of Agabrah, of the Abbasid Caliphate. And you are currently my guest at the palace, for saving me..."
Gobbi's eyes widened as the implications of his actions clicked into place.
"Princess? But you're still a girl!"
She let out an unladylike snort.
"Hah! I just surpassed my sixteenth summer, so I am on the cusp of womanhood."
She looked him over, and her hazel eyes glittered as she caressed his face again.
"Thou are quite comely, for a farangī. Tell me, lovely fair-skinned boy who saved my life, what is thy name?"
His brain froze up, and he recited his name and rank mechanically.
"Um, Private First Class Pete Gobbi, Ma'am."
The girl looked puzzled.
"Pry-pryvait?"
"A Private First Class, it's a military rank..."
Her eyes lit up.
"Ah, thou art a salibi! I should have known by thy bearing."
She ran one of her hands over his plate carrier, along with its pouches. She seemed particularly fascinated by the velcro straps and the noises they made.
"But thy raiment and armor is nothing like the pictures and descriptions that my scribes have said about thy kind. Art thou different? Where doest thou come from? The Kingdom of the Franks?"
Gobbi shook his head.
"Ah, from a faraway place, Ma'am..."
He felt a pain on his arm as the princess pinched him.
"I told thee, my name is Jasmine!"
Her fair features creased into a frown.
"My guards wanted to kill thee on sight, thy companions caused much pain and suffering in the city."
She seemed guarded as she asked the question.
"Art thou invaders, as my guards would believe?"
Gobbi shook his head vigorously.
"Ah, that's a negative, princess. This was all just a big mistake, fog of war, that whole shit..."
He saw the puzzled look on Jasmine's face.
"Look, I just arrived here when the shit hit the fan, but from what I gathered, one of my buddies got into trouble, and the rest of my cadre went charging in to rescue him, and apparently made a mess..."
The princess slowly nodded.
"A misunderstanding...that would explain why thou didst risk thy life to save me..."
The private didn't know how to respond to that, but didn't have to, as he saw the princess pick up his M4 by the barrel. She turned it over in her hands, and for a moment Gobbi thought how ridiculous a delicate princess from an Arabian Nights tale looked carrying a NATO-grade assault rifle. He gingerly took it from her and secured the weapon.
"I'll take that, you don't want to be playin' around with my boomstick, it'll hurt ya if you're not careful..."
She laughed again.
"Oh, thou art so amusing, Pete Gobbi of the rank of Private First Class...I would so much like to beg Father to keep thee here just as a companion..."
She paused and leaned in, the scent of her perfumes almost overwhelming.
"Thou art not a prince, perchance? Or have any Royal blood?"
Pete chuckled.
"Ah, that's a negative, princess. Just a hillbilly from Kentucky."
She leaned back on her haunches, clearly disappointed.
"A pity then...I wish'd thou wert a prince in disguise, then I would have finally found a suitable suitor."
That set off more warning bells in Gobbi's head, and he tried to steer the conversation away from him.
"Ah, hold on a sec...didn't you have a fella that you're carrying a torch for, y'know, that diamond in the rough?"
She turned sharply and arched one of her perfectly plucked eyebrows.
"What doest thou know of that lowly street rat?"
That didn't sound like a term of endearment to me, Gobbi thought to himself. This could be bad. He glanced back at the princess, and saw the look she was giving him. Scratch that, this was bad.
"Ah, well you see, I find it odd that you an' him were an item, and I didn't realize you had a fallin' out..."
The princess giggled and and stroked Pete's cheek again. The private thought that she liked to do that and would use any excuse to do it again. Gobbi tried to keep the conversation focused on her beau.
"Um, princess?"
"I told thee, it's Jasmine!"
"Well, Jasmine, Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why do ya hate on the street rat so much?"
She let out an unladylike snort.
"I thought he was different, but I was wrong...all he cares about is gold, so he can become royalty..."
Gobbi shook his head.
"C'mon, you know the only reason he wanted that treasure is because he knows he can't be with ya if he's a commoner!"
The princess looked at him directly, and for a moment Pete thought he might have said the wrong thing. She then laughed.
"Thou art a mystery, Pete Gobbi of the rank of Private First Class! I so wish thou wert a noble."
"Why's that?"
The princess smiled slyly as she crawled towards him. Pete tried scooting away, to no avail.
"Then I could ask and receive Father's blessing for marriage."
Channeling her pet tiger, Jasmine crouched down and then jumped, landing in Gobbi's lap. Now straddling him, she ran a finger down his chest, smiling licentiously.
"Or we could just enter into a sutric congress...if thou wert to defile me and put a baby in my belly then Father will have no choice..."
She paused and put a finger to her chin.
"Of course, I will have to make sure Father doesn't castrate and kill thee for impregnating his daughter..."
Any illicit thoughts of a teenaged girl in vaporwear straddling him left Pete Gobbi's mind and dumped a metaphorical ice bucket on his crotch. He pushed the princess off, causing her to land on her rump and squeal. The private pulled himself to his feet.
"Look sweetie, there ain't gonna be no conjugal congress or deflowering or anything like that! Y'all are a princess and yer gonna find the love of yer life..."
He reached down and grabbed his M4, slinging it over his shoulder. Jasmine seemed to read his mind.
"Wait! Where art thou going?"
Gobbi looked around for his helmet.
"Leaving...Lt. Bradley's probably wondering why I didn't make the rally point..."
Suddenly spying his cover on a nearby end-table, the private grabbed it. The princess had no idea what 'rally point' meant, but she was able to parse out that her fair-skinned boy was leaving her. As he took his helmet, she grabbed the chin strap, causing Gobbi to stop.
"Hey, leggo!"
She stamped her foot and raised her chin obstinately.
"No! Not until thou promises to stay!"
"No can do, princess. I gotta RV with my cadre and hope they don't do more rash shit..."
Before she could respond the doors to her boudoir crashed open, revealing several Royal Guards, including the burly captain of the guards. Instinctively Gobbi raised his M4, backing away from the princess. He also notice a smaller man, wearing opulent silk robes and a highly ornate turban. At a guess, the private reasoned that was the sultan, her father. His guess was confirmed when the diminutive man frowned at Gobbi, and pointed a chubby finger at him.
"Kill him! That giaour has violated the sanctity of my daughter's privacy!"
The guards, including the captain, hesitated as they saw Gobbi's M4. The sultan had only heard second-hand accounts of the foreigner's thunder weapons, and doubted their accuracy. The captain, on the other hand, had witnessed their deadliness first-hand, and there was no doubt in his mind. As it turned out, his hesitation was unnecessary as Jasmine cried out.
"No, guards! I forbid it!"
The princess turned to her father.
"Father, thou wilt do no such thing! I forbid it!"
The sultan shook his head.
"That is the advantage of being sultan, good daughter. I can do anything I wish..."
He gave the foreigner pointing some sort of short metal spear at his guards.
"Including ordering the execution of a vile infidel whose profane gaze has witnessed your beauty unguarded..."
The princess advanced on her father, glaring at him.
"Father, if thou dost kill this boy, then I will have no reason for living, and will fling myself from the highest tower of his palace..."
The sultan paused, and glanced over at his daughter.
"You wouldn't..."
Gobbi could see that the sultan was trying to convince himself as much as his daughter. Jasmine held up her head and continued.
"If thou harmest a blonde hair on my beautiful fair-skinned farangi boy's head, I swear by the Lord Allah I will do it, and be damned forever in Haawiyah."
The private saw it as a good distraction, and piped up.
"She'll jump, yer majesty!"
The sultan looked over to Gobbi as if he had just hatched out of nowhere.
"You stay out of this!"
The private tried diplomacy.
"Okay, so there's no reason for anyone to be jumping off anything...Look, your highness, this is all a big misunderstanding..."
The princess nodded emphatically.
"Yes, that boy saved my life! He is my rescuer!"
Her father's demeanor change immediately. He cheerfully clasped his hands as he looked over to Gobbi.
"Oh, so you were the one who saved her from those horrid thugs? Well, that's splendid!"
The private slung his M4 and started for the door.
Yeah, great. Now, if you want to throw me out, y'won't have to, I'll leave freely. I gotta report in..."
He looked up at Fareed, who was still glaring at him.
"Can ya tell Tall and Grizzly here to step aside so I can leave?"
Jasmine grasped her fathers' hand.
"No, Father, please do not let him go! he is my savior!"
Both Gobbi and the captain of the Guards stared at the princess, both equally shocked.
"What?"
"What he said, what-what?"
But the princess continued, her gaze fell on Gobbi.
"Let him stay...as my guest."
The sultan shook his head.
"Oh, Jasmine, really I can't stand your rebellious behavior! Why can't you be this way towards the princes who come courting?"
She smiled, still staring at the private.
"Because this one is different! He is sweet, and kind and he is a mighty warrior."
Fareed stared incredulously at Gobbi, who shrugged his shoulders at the captain.
"Hey, that last bit is a stretch."
She looked at her father with shining eyes. The last time I saw this trick it was in a Japanese cartoon, Gobbi thought to himself as he watch the scene unfold.
"Please?"
The sultan finally relented.
"Oh, all right."
Gobbi reacted before the guards did.
"Wait, what?! Don't I have a say so in this?"
The sultan smiled as he gazed at the princess.
"You have my gratitude for saving my daughter's life, and what's more you've been a gentleman towards her, and not to be too blunt you're the first man that she hasn't thrown out on the seat of his pantaloons. And I can't refuse any request my dear daughter asks of me."
He then turned his attention to Gobbi.
"And to answer your question, I'm afraid you don't have a say so in the matter."
He paused.
"Of course, I expect you to maintain proper decorum with my daughter..."
He wagged his finger at the private.
"I warn you, if you lay your hands on her and despoil her virtue, then you will either have to marry her, or you will be executed."
The sultan saw the look of horror on Gobbi's face and shrugged apologetically.
"I'm sorry boy, those are the rules..."
Gobbi watched as the sultan left, then looked over his shoulder and saw the princess wink mischievously at him. He saw the captain of the guards still remaining at the threshold.
"Ah, buddy, I know this sounds odd, but even a dungeon cell is sounding comfy about now..."
Fareed could see the young man's discomfort, and felt sorry for him, in spite of him being an infidel and a foreigner. But the princess clapped her hands, interrupting his thoughts.
"Guards, leave us! And I am not to be disturbed, is that clear?"
The captain gave a low bow.
"As you command, your majesty."
The private turned and barely had enough time to react as the princess pounced on him, sending them both into a large pile of overstuffed pillows. Gobbi was once again overwhelmed by the smell of perfumes and musky spices as the girl frantically kissed his face. He felt his temperature rising, and vaguely he could feel a small pair of hands fumbling around where his belt was. That was enough for Gobbi to come to his senses, and he tried to push the princess off him.
But this time, she was not going to be so easily dissuaded.
"Thou strugglest too much, Pete Gobbi of the rank of Private First Class! Many men would go to war for the privilege of taking my virtue! If thou despoiles't me then thou wilt have to marry me!"
Fortunately for Gobbi buttons won't be invented for another 600 years, as evident by the princess's inability to figure out how to unbutton them.
"Wilt thou stop struggling!"
She huffed exasperatedly and sat up.
"Thy breeches, how to they come undone?"
Gobbi shook his head.
"No can do!"
"Why!?"
"Because one, these ACU pants are property of the US Army and two they're they only think preventing me from givin' in to temptation."
The princess sighed, then something caught her eye. A sly smile pursed her lips as she stood up.
"Well, there is more than one way to filet a fish..."
She padded over to the end-table and opened a drawer, revealing an ornamental dagger. She picked up and walked back over to Gobbi.
"Now, either tell me how to unfasten your breeches, or I will cut them off!"
Before Gobbi could respond the doors to the princess's chambers were flung open. A pair of guards fell to the ground, unconscious, and a woman stepped in. She was tall, with dark hair and grey eyes, and was dressed in a revealing harem outfit complete with slippers in dark red. Pete noticed two things about the newcomer, she had to be from his world, and she was also a soldier. Mostly because she had tattoos on her shoulders and arms, including an Eagle, Globe and Anchor, which meant she was a Marine, and the woman was also brandishing a Beretta M9 handgun. The woman looked over to him and spoke.
"Private Gobbi?"
The woman stated it in a voice that spoke of an senior NCO or commanding officer. Instinctively Gobbi straightened up.
"Yes ma'am!"
"You're coming with me, private. I'm your ticket outta here..."
The private breathed a sigh of relief as he stood up, pushing the still stunned princess off him.
"You're a sight for sore eyes, ma'am..."
The Marine glared at Gobbi.
"I hope that wasn't a comment on my getup, private, or that'll cost you later. An' save the gratitude for Lt. Bradley, assuming he doesn't shoot your ass for the shitstorm you've caused..."
She turned her attention back to the princess who was still sitting on the ground, staring at the two of them in stunned silence.
"Sorry, Princess, but the Private's coming with me."
Jasmine finally came to her senses and glared at the woman.
"No! He's my beloved, and he is to become my husband! Find thy own thrall, harem whore!"
Captain Pelayo's eyes narrowed.
"Flattery will get you nowhere, princess."
Gobbi started towards the door, and the princess started to call out, only to be silenced by a deafening crack. Pelayo had fired her M9 in the air, and it seemed to have the desired effect. Both the princess and her pet tiger were frozen in place. She leveled her weapon on Raj.
"...And I love cats, but if Tigger on`Roids over there moves then he's getting a lead salad."
Pelayo stepped over the unconscious guards and motioned Gobbi to do the same. As they left she noticed that the private was staring, specifically at her clothes, or lack thereof.
"Screw your eyeballs back into your sockets, private. An' I hope for your sake you have ammo for that weapon, otherwise this is gonna be a real short trip..."
Glossary:
Ḍaḥḥāk: A demon in Persian mythos that takes the form of a huge, fire-breathing dragon.
Salibi: A mercenary for hire.
Haawiyah: One of the names for Hell in Islam.
(AN: And yes, before anyone says it, I'm a stinker for doing that to PFC Gobbi :) Facing down blue ballin', then death, then more blue-ballin', then a scantily-clad Marine...He's had a busy time on his first day on the job XD
Also I know in the fluff of the cartoon Aladdin the sultan's name is Hamed Bolobonius II, but it didn't sound right so I took some artistic liberties...And if the princess seems flighty and spoiled, well that's part of my deconstruction of the tale. In most of the Disney princess tales she has a single parent, and usually that parent is useless. In real life those types of situations lead to the offspring becoming a spoiled brat. Case and point. Ditto for the sultan, if he comes off as a ditz and not a very good judge of character, well, he has Jaffar as an advisor so go figure. I wanted to emphasize that in this chapter, that maybe the bad guy has a point. Anyways, hopefully it struck the right balance.
As for the reason the princess is speaking in Ye Olde Archaic English is to show that she speaks a more refined version of Farsi than the 'street lingo' of Aladdin.
So, the cavalry shows up in the form of the Marines (or Marine, in this case), saving PFC Gobbi from a fate worse than death! Will Gobbi and Pelayo make it out of the palace? Well, I should have the next chapter up by Easter, I've been neglecting another writing project and I promised myself that I would get that chapter done before putting out another chapter for this one. And in fairness that still puts me at the two week turnaround timeframe that I have been keeping up on this story. Fair warning, once the training mission is over and we get into the actual fairy tales, updates will be more like once a month. Until then!)