My heart thudded in my ears, blocking out any and all sounds. Was anyone saying anything. The pixie-girl had stopped bouncing. I stared at the sofa, taking in the lean but muscular figure that rose to his height over six meters. His golden eyes gazed across at me – wide, drinking up the view. He was real. The small girl, left on the sofa, watched him nervously.

"Jasper?" I breathed, joy bubbling up in my chest. His lips quirked upwards in recognition. I beamed; my next words breathless with laughter. "Jasper! You're real!"

I leapt towards him and threw my arms around his neck hugging him to me with all the strength I had. The girl he had sat beside hissed but no one acknowledged her. It was then my heart dropped; the warm body that used to hug me so tightly was now a cold one that tensed at my touch. Firm, freezing hands wrapped around the tops of my arms and gently, slowly, he pushed me away. My heart, down in my stomach, clenched as he took several determined steps away from me.

"Jasper?" I whispered, taking in his stiff posture and clenched jaw. I could almost swear that he wasn't breathing. For a moment all I heard was my own breathing.

"Stay away, Emmelyn," my heart lifted at his voice even as it broke. His voice was comforting and familiar even though I was sure it held a new ring to it than wasn't there when I had last spoken to him decades ago.

"What?" I asked, staring at him in disbelief. I felt tears tingling my nose from all the emotions that were rocking through me. I had imagined being reunited Jasper many times, though I knew it was near impossible, I had always imagined it happy and joyful; just like it was when Jasper returned for a short leave during the civil war. I'd imagine him picking me up and swinging me around like he had then, both of us laughing. I had never imagined this. Never had I thought Jasper, of all people, would push me away.

I watched horrified and heartbroken as a pale hand rose to reinforce his point, "stay back. Stay where you are."

I swallowed thickly, unsure what was going on. I stared across the feet that separated us with wide eyes. Jasper stared back desperately; his eyes a horrid reminder that everything was wrong. They should be brown, I thought stubbornly, almost like Maman's. Coffee. I took a step forward towards him and he instantly moved further back. I felt tears flood my eyes at his obvious rejection and a sob escaped me.

I covered my face with my hands, trying to hide the tears from him but, with no comfort forthcoming, I wrapped my arms around myself.

"Jasper," it was more of a sob than a word and I realised I had said little else since setting eyes on him.

"Emma, I love you," he whispered, agony distorting his features, a different type of handsome than I remembered them. "So please, please, just stay where you are."

Even with his eyes the wrong colour, I knew true sorrow from him when I saw it. I had always been able to tell what Jasper was feeling, though whether that was about me or him I was never sure. I nodded and watched him relax ever so slightly. Pain shot through me and his expression morphed once more.

"Jazz, I shouldn't have lied," I whispered the words I had wanted to tell him since I heard he'd gone missing. "I shouldn't have lied to Daddy. He wouldn't have let you sign up, if he had known, he would have never let you go."

"Don't do that," Jasper practically growled at me.

"Do what?" I breathed, trying to brush away the tears that still fell stubbornly down my cheeks. His hand twitched as though he wanted to close the distance between us and brush them away like he always had but he stayed firmly where he was, across the big, white room and silhouetted by the large dark windows.

"It's not your fault."

"I should you stopped you," I sobbed, ignoring his words. I had lied to Dad so he could sneak out and join the war too early. If I hadn't lied, Dad would have made sure Jasper didn't go, he would have made certain of it. Jasper wouldn't have gone to war when he did and things could have been changed.

Jasper's lips quirked, "I'd like to have seen you try."

I laughed but it came out watery and the amusement of Jasper's face faded as quickly as it up come.

"What's wrong with you?" I whispered so low I couldn't be entirely sure he could hear me, but he had. He broke our eye contact and sat back down beside the dark-haired pixie. I stayed frozen where I was, I couldn't stand to hear him tell me to stay away from him again.

"I can't tell you," he answered eventually, his voice tense and firm.

"Why not?" I snapped and his head snapped back to me, surprise clear on his face. I was rarely curt with him. "You can't just not tell me. I need to know what's happened to you. I have to. I'm your sister, Jasper!"

I heard a gasp from behind me but didn't care if it was Carlisle or Esme or someone else entirely that had made the noise. Jasper had shot to his feet, matching my frustration with his own "I can't be trusted, Emmelyn!"

"I trust you," I swallowed thickly, my voice as whisper once more, "I've always trusted you."

Jasper didn't look at me but looked over my shoulder, "I'm guessing Dad's probably here with you. He must be worried: Carlisle will drive you home."

I clenched my jaw, "so he can be trusted but you can't?"/

Jasper stared back at me and I glared, trying to appear threatening but knew that being soaked to the skin – Esme's towel having been thrown to the floor long ago – and with tears streaming unabashed down my face, I did not give the impression I desired.

"Yes," Jasper's words were grave, and, in that moment, I sensed some true darkness in him. Darkness I could not account for. Darkness I certainly didn't remember from my brother. He turned away from me then and Esme's arm appeared comfortingly around my shoulders guiding me away from him. I was so lost in my word of upset that I couldn't even be embarrassed around the scene I had just caused in from of what was likely Jaspers' new family. My stomach lurched: he didn't need me anymore.

Carlisle and Esme moved with me to the dining room. They didn't speak much as I tried to calm myself down and Esme tried to squeeze the last of the water from my hair. It was nearly dry now anyway, beginning to curl and flutter around my face. Carlisle rested a hand comfortingly on my shoulder but soon I realised that darkness had surrounded the house long ago. Dad would be terrified something had happened to me.

"You don't mind driving me home, do you, Carlisle?" I asked softly. "I can walk if it's inconvenient."

Carlisle gazed at me softly with a furrowed brow, "Are your parents there?"

I nodded, not bothering to correct him that it was only Dad. Maman was not a hiker and she was far too busy with weddings to take time away from her floristry business.

Carlisle stood slowly and I followed his lead, letting him guide me with a gently hand under my elbow. Jasper shot me a tortured smile as we walked into the main room but I couldn't respond. I felt numb.