Lexa POV

I gazed forlornly into the fire as it crackled happily away, my mind going back to the last few email exchanges with Griffin. Her life seemed to be turning around for the better. She was healing, painting again, and the latest; she had fallen in love. As much as it made me happy to read those words, it made me painfully aware of how lonely I was. I was still on the outs with Anya and I found myself missing her as if a part of my heart was. I knew that there wasn't anything that I could really do about it except wait for Anya to forgive me.

Then there was Clarke, another shadow in my life. I had given her what she wanted. I stayed away as my people did the same. Her only interaction was with Jackson. The only time I ever saw her was when I would accidentally catch her at the ledge. She seemed to find peace there as much as I did and that made me happy. My attraction to her seemed to grow every time I saw her, but I didn't know if it was because I couldn't have her or if it was something else, something deeper than mere attraction. Either way, I knew that there would be no way to ever find out. I just had to accept that and stop torturing myself.

Sighing, I walked back over to my desk and sat down. There were still preparations to be made to ensure that the Solstice Festival we held with Eden would go off with minimum disruption. I had nearly completed which groups would be allowed to have a booth this year and the obligatory speech I was to give. Even though we no longer lived in Eden, my family was still recognized as one of founders and I was expected to attend. With a deep breath, I dug once more into my work and didn't look up again until there was a knock on the door.

"Enter," I called out, my head still bent over my work.

"Hey, Lex," Lincoln said as he came in. "You got a minute?"

I looked up at him and smiled, "For you, sure. What's up?"

I leaned back, stretching my arms over my head, as he came and sat in one of the chairs.

"My new girl has invited me to a dinner next Friday," he said. "And since I know that you don't have any plans then, I was wondering if you'd like to come with me? You know, get out of the house, the office, out of your head. Just for one evening."

I sighed, looking at him and realizing that he was trying to get me to ease up on work.

"I've been overworking myself, haven't I," I replied.

"You have. Ever since you had your fight with Anya and then your conversation with Clarke, you've been working nearly nonstop. You need to just be, even if it's for one night."

"Do I have a choice?"

"We always have a choice, Lex, but I'm telling you that you really need this. Especially once your part of the Festival is done with."

I glanced over at the painting, debating. Or rather, trying to find an excuse not to go. Unfortunately, I was left high and dry when nothing came to me.

"Fine," I said. "I'll go, just don't expect too much out of me."

He grinned wide and said, "Great. I'll pick you up at your place at six."

"Why can't I just meet you there," I nearly whined.

"Because I know you, Lex. You'll come up with some lame ass excuse not to go, and you are going," he said, looking at me sternly.

"Dammit, Linc," I said, groaning. "I fucking hate you."

He grinned at me impishly, "I love you too, Lex. Don't worry, it's not going to kill you."

"Whatever," I grumbled. "I gotta get this done."

He sighed dramatically, "Fine. Just a reminder we gotta be at Eden Park at three."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," I mumbled, waving my hand at him. "Get ye gone, beast."

"As you wish," he replied, laughing.

He got up and left me to finish my speech.

I walked up to the stage that had been set up for the beginning of the Festival. Greeting the Mayor and the Sheriff, I stood aside and scanned the crowd. Lincoln had disappeared as soon as we got to the park and Anya was off to the side, ignoring me with a glower.

I spotted Lincoln as he leaned towards a petite dark haired woman, smiling at something she had said. That must be his new girlfriend. I watched them wistfully as they talked, heads bent towards each other and wished once more that I wasn't so lonely. They were soon joined by other people. A tall, lanky man that bore a strong resemblance to the woman, another petite woman with tanned skin and brown hair, a chipper blonde, and an Asian looking young man. They seemed to be in a deep conversation and would occasionally glance around as if they were looking for someone.

Having seen enough, I let my eyes wander and in the setting sun, I saw her. I saw Clarke and she was with a woman. My heart seized for a moment before it began beating rapidly. Watching them, I recognized the other woman as Janice, the waitress from Rosie's. I was also painfully aware that they were a couple. I watched as they kissed and then broke apart, laughing. I don't know why, but it was hard for me to watch and I felt something akin to disappointment.

I tore my eyes away and searched for Lincoln once more. Spotting him, I couldn't help but smiled bittersweetly as he leaned down and kissed the woman. It looked like he was happy and then seeing Clarke happy, made me glance at Anya. She had her head down, focused on her phone. I wanted very much to walk over and talk to her, but her very body language told me that she wanted to be alone.

As the sun finally set, the mayor stepped up to the podium and welcomed everyone to the Festival. When it was my turn to give my speech, I did so as I scanned the crowd and found Clarke and Janice once more. She seemed shock to see me there, said something to Janice, and then nodded when Janice responded. She spared me one last glance and then they headed out. All in all, it appeared that this would be a very crappy Christmas for me.