Chapter 5
Guest: Thank you for catching my stupid mistake! I must have had a brain fart, by calling Edward Cullen, Cullen instead of "the master". Thank you. I went and edited it right away. This is why I need a beta lol. I mean we all knew it was Cullen…but didn't mean to ruin it completely. Thank you for reading.
Scattycow: Hey! This story is a little Beauty in the Beast like..huh. I never thought about it that way, but I guess it could be. Love the movie by the way. Do I want Edward and Bella together in the end?...read and find out. Thank you for reading.
Ajfflady: The dialog between Bella and Edward can be like watching a tennis match. Good analogy. You mentioned you can't tell if he is baiting her and teasing to get these reactions or if he truly looks down on her. Well, it could be a bit of all of them. Edward is unique in that we just aren't sure if what he reflects on the outside is really how he feels on the inside. The only way to know, is to read on. Get to know him. I think maybe this chapter will help everyone to see Edward a little better. Thank you for reading.
sherylb: He is arrogant. I thought that comment was funny.
As Cullen and I approached a large black carriage, the stagecoach smiled at me, and tipped his hat. I returned his smile, and bowed my head in respect. Cullen cleared his throat. "No need for those formalities Swan." In a quick jolt, Cullen opened the carriage door for me and stood calmly as I stopped abruptly to take in the lavished interior. The small black couches on both sides were very plush with petite white pillows. It was wonderfully inviting.
I glanced at Cullen, who simply raised a brow. "Stand out here any longer we both will catch cold."
I held my head high, as I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at his constant bossy demeanor and stepped in to take my seat on the far end of the carriage. The seats were in fact just as comfortable as they looked before I sat in them. When I glanced out the window of the carriage, I could not help the smile that naturally appeared on my face. Never had I ridden in such a wealthy transport before. I wondered if I ever would again. Cullen climbed in and sat gracefully on the couch across from me. Swiftly, he took off his hat and placed it next to him on the seat.
"Excuse me Miss." Cullen and I both looked to the stagecoach who stood by the open carriage door while holding out a fluffy cream-colored blanket. "For the lady. It's quite chilly out tonight, the breeze gets very strong when we start to move."
My eyes widened as I sat at a loss for words for a moment. "Um, no. No, you needn't- I mean, thank you. But I don't think-" I looked to Cullen who turned away from me with an amused smile on his lips. He clearly would be of no help to me. It was apparent he would not decline the gesture for me, but chose to remain out of the conversation completely.
The man continued to hold the blanket out to me, motioning for me to take it. So, reached for it and took the soft comfort with an uneasy smile. "Thank you, Sir." He smiled at me.
"I'd feel awfully bad to have you catch a cold Miss. Now, where are we off to?"
Cullen looked at me and raised a brow, waiting for my response. This was indeed the part I was dreading the most. Cullen was used to living in such comfort. A life of privilege. But my residence was far from lavished. It was not where people of his status would even pass through by mistake.
"Um, I live at the end of town. Near the woods. It's not around here." Cullen tipped his head to the side as I struggled not to say the obvious. With a nod he proceeded to take over the conversation.
"Take us to the back streets," Cullen said to the man. The stagecoach bowed and shut the door taking his place up top. We were off in a matter of moments. It wasn't long before I felt goosebumps running up the sides of my arms from the cold breeze. Wasting no time, I awkwardly placed the blanket across my lap, as the cold air swept in from the windows and continued to send chills down my body.
Besides the sound of horse hooves and the occasional creaking of the carriage I tried not to look at Cullen as he stared aimlessly out the window. Even when I looked at him, try as I might, his expression was unreadable anyhow. Suddenly, I felt my body lean forward as we hit a small dip in the road. I quickly moved to steady myself letting the blanket fall to the floor. Before I could lean forward to pick it up, Cullen quickly grabbed it and slowly handed it to me.
"Thank you," I whispered while taking the blanket and covering myself again to hide from the cold. He didn't say anything but acknowledged my words with a nod. To end the silence between us, I finally cleared my throat, "is this a habit of yours? Taking women home?" Immediately I grimaced at my poor choice of words. "I mean taking women to their home." Again. I scrunch my face in disapproval.
Cullen looked at me and chuckled. "Accompanying ladies to their place of residence to be sure of their safety when they have no carriage of their own is expected of a gentleman."
"Indeed. And I am thankful. But some ladies need no carriages. Some prefer to walk."
"Must you argue everything? I'm not picking a fight with you. I am simply doing what is done. What is right."
I sighed. He was correct after all. But after our first encounter, I was having a hard time seeing him as a gentleman. It was still hard for me to believe that he would even care about my safety to escort me home himself. "I don't mean to be offensive. I just didn't expect you to-"
He looked at me with interest as I stopped mid-sentence. When I didn't continue, he leaned forward slightly. "Miss Swan, there are certain traditions and customs to follow. I would not seek out the shame of having you leave my home so late and have something happen to you. Formalities must be observed. Do not think it anything else. It is not to flatter you."
"Of course not. You certainly don't seem like a courter." Again, I bit my impulsive tongue.
He scoffed. "What do you mean?"
"Nothing. I mean nothing by my words. Pay them no mind."
"No. I insist. Please do tell and enlighten me on what you think of me."
"Well, I meant exactly what I said. You don't seem like the sort of gentlemen that courts." His eyes narrowed for a moment
"Too bold Miss Swan. What else would I do with a respectable lady if not court her?"
"I don't know what you would do. It would not be right to assume your actions."
"I think you already have." He straightened himself upright again and folded his arms across his chest. "I have nothing against courting a lady. But I rarely must. I am well endowed with any and everything a proper lady could ever want. Many women consider me quite the catch."
"You speak as though money replaces love."
"Love," he mocked, "love is what they write about in fairy tales. In reality, marriage is a contract. Women seek security, luxuries, and fine things. Men seek physical pleasure and children."
"I hope those aren't the words you use to court a lady. Certainly, you don't hope to sweep a girl off her feet with that talk."
He mockingly laughed, "Proper ladies are aware of such things. Only those of lesser means and inferior birth dream up extravagant notions, and silly ideas of love because no legitimate gentlemen would ever court or make an offer of marriage to them. Dreams are all they have."
My eyes widened as his words sunk into my mind. In irritation I turned away. His words cut deeply. I chewed on my bottom lip choosing not to make eye contact with him. "I assume you are referring to me, and my notions of love. Maybe I am of lesser means, and maybe my ideas of love are silly. But a life without love, is not a life at all. I guess that's only something a person of inferior birth can understand," I jeered back.
He remained quiet as I slowly looked back at him with a look of fury. He studied me for a moment and then looked ready to respond when suddenly the carriage came to an abrupt halt. We must have been close to my home. I looked out the window and confirmed we were indeed close, but additional direction was needed.
Cullen cleared his throat. "How much further Miss Swan?"
"I'm at the end of the road on the left." It was a well-known part of the slums, or in other words, a place of those with very little means. Cullen's eyes darted from side to side as he silently confirmed for himself exactly where I lived. He then turned to tell the driver and we continued.
When we arrived, there was not much to look at. Thank goodness it was night, or the sight would have been much worse. Nevertheless, one could still see the rundown homes, the lack of sanitation, narrow lanes, and heaps of garbage in the corners.
"This is where you live?" He asked in a low tone as he looked out the window of the carriage. But although his face was turned away from me, he could not hide the look of disgust etched across his face.
When we had traveled a little further, I leaned forward. "You can stop here. I'll walk the rest of the way." Instantly Cullen told the driver to stop, then immediately got out of the carriage to hold the door open for me. He offered me his hand of help, but I ignored it as I stepped out.
"Thank you for the escort and stimulating conversation." I quickened my pace to my home, wrapping my shawl around my shoulders. Cullen shut the door to the carriage and ran to catch up to me. I rolled my eyes, "No need to follow, I am home now. Best be on your way, before you sully your pretty boots."
"You are angry with me," he grinned.
"No," I lied, "Just fatigued."
"Admit it. You are upset because of my words to you about love."
I stopped and jerked my head to him in wrath, "I don't like superiority. And what's more, I think any man who approaches love like a contract shouldn't be married at all."
"And yet many are."
I heaved a sigh of frustration and continued to my house. "Well they shouldn't be."
"Sometimes, love comes later. Attraction, lust, longing, all can come later in a marriage. First security is needed. A woman is happy when she is guaranteed protection and a comfortable home."
"And how do you know what truly makes a woman happy? How many women have you asked what truly makes them happy? Not all females are as shallow and dimwitted as the women you court." I scoffed. "Or don't court."
He laughed a little, "Are you saying these are things that do not bring you happiness? They are things that you do not seek to have someday?"
I stopped again and faced him. "Of course, I do. Who wouldn't? Those things are nice-"
"Needed. Those things are needed. Not just nice. A lady reaches her highest beauty when she is well taken care of and must not struggle for simple necessities in life."
"A woman is happy when she is content with the things around her. And contentment leads to happiness. And either way, I would never marry for money." He tipped his head to the side with a small smirk.
"I think you are confusing money with freedom. A good marriage affords freedom for both. To experience life. To be intimate with. Most do not fear a loveless marriage, they fear the unlived life."
"Isa? Isa!" I gasped at the sound of Mary's voice. Mary came running out of the house excited to see me. "I'm so happy you are home! I was worried something happened to you when you did not come home with the sun." She threw her arms around me.
I kissed her head and hugged her close, "It's alright," I chuckled, "I'm fine. I'll always come home to you." She nestled her face into my stomach as Cullen looked on in silence. "How is father?"
"Oh! Doctor Hale is with him now."
"What?"
"He said he was scheduled to come by, but when you weren't home, he left to attend to other patients. When he came back again, you still were not home, but father was awake, and he gave him permission to come in."
"Heavens, I completely forgot," I shook my head.
Mary finally caught sight of Cullen. Her eyes widened a little. She looked at the big black carriage not too far away and then back at Cullen. "Isa, is he? Market? The man from the mar-"
"Mary this is Mr. Cullen. He was just escorting me home. That is all." I gave her a warning look, to which she ignored.
"You rode in that carriage?" she said pointing to his carriage. "Alone?" She smiled, "and at night?"
Cullen chuckled.
"Go inside, while I say goodnight to Mr. Cullen. I'll be in shortly." She smiled slyly at me and gave a bashful smile to Cullen. I sighed. Sometimes she was just over the top. She hurried inside but I could see her peeking through the window curtains. "Well, again, thank you for the ride home."
"You are welcome." He looked at my house, his eyes darting this way and that as he examined it. As he did so his face held a look of vulgar. He then looked around at the surroundings again failing to hide another look of repulse. "I'll see you inside before I leave." Why was he so set on being the perfect gentleman? He did not need to impress me. We would never have a future together. He was my boss. And that is as far as we would ever go. Besides, he clearly believed himself to be above courting someone from my station.
But no matter how much I wanted to hate him, or say a few choice words to him, I could not. He had given me work, decent pay, and saw me home safe. I would have to be insane to attack him verbally after all he had done for me.
"Very well," I said with limited patience. Cullen walked beside me slowly until we approached the door of my home. It was strange to see him, of all people, at my door escorting me home. We stopped a few feet away from the door and I stood before him embracing the awkward silence. There always seemed to be awkward silence between us.
"I hope you have a pleasant night Miss Swan."
"Thank you." I turned to walk away but stopped for a moment, unsure of how to say the words. "Mr. Cullen,"
"Miss Swan?" His eyes locked onto mine as if he was just waiting for a reason to stay. But that must have been a fantasy in my mind. Why in god's name would he ever want to stay in such a rundown dirty part of town?
"You will never know what it has meant to me, but thank you, for hiring me and giving me work."
"I think I can understand considering your circumstances." I could not tell if he was being genuine or mocking me. His face did not give way to any emotion. A simple you are welcome would have sufficed though.
"Even if we differ in our ideals, I also did appreciate the conversation. I hope you have a safe trip home. I would offer refreshments were it not so late."
"Perhaps one day we will see eye to eye." What did that mean? What was it supposed to mean?
"I do not think so, we are too different Mr. Cullen." He nodded once, a ghost of a smile on his lips. He opened his mouth to reply but stopped when his eyes caught sight of something behind me.
"Miss Swan?" I whirled around caught off guard. Doctor Hale was standing in the doorway cleaning his hands with a small white rag.
"Doctor Hale! I'm so sorry. I apologize for forgetting our appointment. I got stuck working late. And the time just flew-"
He held up a hand with a smile. "No worries Miss Swan. No need to explain. Mary was more than willing to let me in, with your father's permission first of course."
"Yes. I am sorry for your two trips. I should have been here to greet you the first time. I will pay you for your trouble. And I do appreciate you coming back."
"Of course, Miss Swan. My pleasure. And payment for one trip will suffice." He smiled at me and then caught sight of Cullen. His brows furrowed. "Edward?"
My eyes widened at the name. He meant Cullen? I mean, Edward? Edward? I turned to Cullen, who was smirking.
"Hello Jasper." Jasper?
"I'm, sorry. Do you two know each other?" I asked skeptically.
"Fairly well," Cullen responded.
Doctor Hale looked at me and then at Cullen with a look of slight disbelief. "Well. You will have to excuse me. I don't want to intrude on you two. I didn't realize you had gentlemen company Miss Swan."
I shook my head violently, embarrassed he would even think Cullen and I were anything but workmates. "Oh no. You are mistaken. We are not, well, we are not-we just work together-"
"I wanted to see Miss Swan home was all," Cullen said with irritation. At what, I did not know. He folded his arms across his chest and switched his weight back and forth on his feet.
"Yes," I agreed. "That was all. And I'm sure he will be on his way now." I looked at him with an obvious look for him to take his leave. But he didn't seem too pleased at my way of dismissing him.
Doctor Hale chuckled. "Well, it sure was nice of you, Edward, to see Miss Swan home. I should hate if something happened to her along the way. I suspect you would as well, otherwise why else would you accompany her?" Cullen rolled his eyes slightly breathing out a sigh.
"Any respectable employer would do so. If he were a true gentleman."
"Ah," Doctor Hale said with surprise, "I was not aware Miss Swan worked for you."
"I was not aware you were her doctor."
What was his issue? Did these two have a vendetta against each other? Seemed so.
"Excuse me," I said interrupting their stare down, "I don't mean to interrupt, but how is my father?" I said looking at Doctor Hale.
He laughed a little. "I'm sorry Miss Swan. We are old friends is all, we have not had the luxury of catching up in a long while. Your father is well. He is recovering nicely. But make sure he continues to rest. Mary tells me he tries to do more than is needed during the day. You must tell him, that he needs to rest his body. In order for the stitches to stay in place, and for him to heal."
My father was more than stubborn but thank goodness he met his match in me. "I will make sure he rests. Even if I must tie him to the bed." I laughed a little. "Thank you, for all your hard work, in coming out to see us."
"Of course. You are by far one my most appreciative patients. And it's always a pleasure to see you doing well."
I blushed a little. "Can I get you anything? Water?"
"Surely he does not intend to stay that long," Cullen chimed in. I looked back him with a scowl, shaking my head a little.
Doctor Hale smiled, "Well I was going to say that is most kind of you, but I must be on my way. I left my bill on the table inside. Of course, no rush. You can continue to pay as we have arranged."
"And what is that arrangement?" Cullen rudely asked, stepping forward between me and Doctor Hale with displeasure.
Doctor Hale looked at Cullen with a mocking look in his eyes, but did not respond.
"What is the arrangement?" He asked again with fury towards Doctor Hale.
"Temper, temper Edward." Doctor Hale smirked. But he was right, Cullen was acting in the strangest way and he did have quite the temper. Nothing had even been done and he was passionately displeased. I would hate to see him legitimately upset.
"It is none of your concern," I stepped around Cullen while glaring at him. "What goes on between me and Doctor Hale had nothing to do with you. Honestly, you should be getting home. I don't want to keep you Mr. Cullen, any longer than I already have."
Doctor Hale tipped his head to the side with a look of amusement. "The lady has spoken." I thought this strange. It was as if I had chosen a side, when I didn't mean to do anything of the sort. Cullen was being too intrusive. And Doctor Hale? Well, he seemed a bit taunting towards Cullen.
"You are coming with me," Cullen said looking at Doctor Hale with irritation. Or should I say Jasper? I smirked. He certainly didn't look like a Jasper to me.
"I have my own transport thank you," Jasper said with humor.
"Finish your business with Miss Swan. Now. I'll wait in my carriage after I dismiss yours." I looked at Jasper with bewilderment. Why didn't he just tell Cullen off? After all, he didn't need to put up with his temper. So why was he?
Cullen then cleared his throat, regaining his composure. "Goodnight Miss Swan," he said bowing slightly. "I will see you tomorrow at work."
I nodded once but did not say anything to him as he stalked off.
Jasper chuckled. "I'm sure that was most interesting to you to watch. And I do apologize on his behalf for his rudeness." I frowned again. There was absolutely no reason for him to take the responsibility of Cullen's bluntness. But Jasper didn't seem all that innocent either. I was a little confused about both their actions.
I smiled awkwardly. "I assume there is some history between you two that I am unaware of. And anyhow, it is none of my business what goes on between you two." I laughed a little. "It was interesting though."
"It's ok to be honest Miss Swan."
"May I ask, without you thinking too poorly of me, why was Ed- I mean Mr. Cullen was so crossed with you? Everything I have seen has led me to the conclusion you are a good and respectable man. How could he treat you so?"
"I would never think poorly of you. As for Edward, we are old friends. And you are right, we do have a history. A history that would take far too long to go into. But as you can see, he does have a temper, especially over things he views as his."
I frowned. Things that are his? "What do you me-"
He laughed again, "Ignore my words, please. I may say he has a temper, but I can't always blame him. It's not all his fault. He has suffered more than most ever will. I feel he is still stuck in torment most days. And I believe he relives his pain every day."
"Torment?"
Jasper shook his head, closing his eyes. "I'm afraid I have said too much. So, how is it working for Mr. Cullen? I had no idea."
I wanted to go back to his words. What did he mean when he said Mr. Cullen had suffered much? Cullen certainly didn't act like he was a man in pain or had suffered much. He was always so unpleasant and arrogant. "It is adequate. I mean, it helps put food on the table. And pay the rent. I'm grateful to him for the work I have."
"Yes, as am I. He is a good man. Demanding. And temperamental at times. But he is loyal, and fair. And from what I hear, his business is very profitable. Not just in this town, but in many across overseas."
"Yes. One has to wonder why he isn't married yet." I caught myself embarrassingly too late. Did those words really just come out of my mouth? I bashfully blushed, "I did not mean that. I mean, I didn't mean to presume anything about his marriage status. I mean, I'm not interested or anything. It was just a senseless comment."
"Miss Swan, its fine. My lips are sealed. But then, who am I to talk anyhow? I too have not yet found a special lady in life."
I smiled again, looking down at the ground. "She would have to be very special to attain the heart of such a fine upstanding gentleman such as yourself."
He smiled deeply at me. "Thank you, Miss Swan. You are too kind to say so."
I glanced over to Cullen's black carriage. He was standing stiffly outside the carriage, his arms folded, and an impatient look etched across his face.
"I better head out, before he sets the dogs on me" Jasper replied. "Have a goodnight Miss Swan."
"Thank you, you as well. And safe journey home." I watched carefully as Jasper made his way to Cullen's carriage. He entered quickly after exchanging a few words with Cullen. But then suddenly Cullen turned his attention to me. His gaze was so deep, I felt he could see right through me.
He stayed stationed in his spot, watching me. I could feel his eyes glued to me. Nervously, I turned and entered into my home, shutting the door behind me.
Taking a deep breath, I placed my back to the hard wooden surface of the door my heart pounding. It was unnerving he could have such an effect on my emotions from one look.
I placed my hand on my beating heart and calmed it by taking more deep breaths. After a moment, I ran to the window and peeked out. I saw he still stood in the darkness, like a ravenous wolf, watching me carefully, as if he knew I would run to the window to watch him, and waited. Our eyes stayed locked for a moment but then I jerked my head away from the window hiding myself. His look of hunger had my heart thrashing in my chest.
Suddenly I heard wheels roll on the bumpy earth as his carriage pulled away. I let out a stiff breath and fanned myself due to the heat rising in my chest.
"You must tell me everything!" Mary grabbed my hand and dragged me over to a chair.
"There is nothing to tell, Mary, believe me. You would be the first to know if there was."
"There must be something, you are flushed."
"Only from the journey home," I got up and poured myself a glass of water.
"Do you think he will call on you again?" I roughly put the glass down on the counter.
"No Mary. He won't. And there is nothing to call on again! It's nothing like that. He was just escorting me home. Now stop inventing such wild fantasies, I won't hear of them."
"But you rode in his carriage. Alone. That must mean he cares for you."
"Trust me, he doesn't. The only thing that man cares for is making a profit. Honestly, the only time he would find something attractive is if someone held a mirror up to him of himself."
"Well, I think he's handsome."
"You say the same for Doctor Hale too."
"Yes. He is very agreeable as well. We could both marry into wealth."
I rolled my eyes. "Mary, it just isn't done. Men like that- well- men like that, in those stations, prefer to marry in their own rank."
"But it's not impossible."
"No, I guess it's not impossible, but rather highly unlikely."
She smiled. "I can live with that."
"Anyhow, it's important, not to marry for money. Marry someone that believes in love. That loves you." Mr. Cullen most certainly did not believe in love.
The next day
I struggled to get Cullen out of my mind. I mean, Edward. Edward. What kind of name was that anyhow, I thought as I hauled piles of laundry into the washing room. Edward. Sound like a name for a snobbish man.
I sighed. Get out of my head Edward! Those silvery eyes. Why did they seem to haunt me? I sighed again. I didn't want to indulge in fantasy. I had to keep in focus the type of man he was. The day we met needed to stay fresh in my mind. He was an arrogant, selfish, prideful money lover. And he believed me of a lesser class. All reasons I should not be thinking of him.
So why couldn't I shake him out?
I thought back to the conversation between Cullen and Dr. Hale. I was curious what that was all about. It was certainly interesting. And what pain had Edward gone through? Was it really a secret?
Perhaps I could pry it out Lisa. I smiled and then mentally slapped myself as I shook my head. I couldn't seem to stop my wild thoughts from thinking of Edward at every turn. Honestly Bella, leave the man alone, my inner self said. He really is none of your concern. You work for him and that is all.
Right I nodded in agreement, determined not to spend another thought on him.
Swoosh.
I closed my eyes. I knew the sound well. A note from the other side of the closet. Just as I was trying to get him out of my mind, he made it all the more difficult. I looked down at the note, wondering if I should pretend I didn't see it and just go about my day. I swallowed hard and with a defeated huff as I picked it up. It read:
"The adjustments you made to my suit are very well done. I'm pleased with it." I smiled as I wrote on the back of it:
"I am glad you approve."
After this short exchange, Edward and I did not speak the rest of the day. When Lisa had dropped off some refreshments to me, she mentioned that he was out of his office for the day supervising the factory. Thankfully he was. My mind didn't need any more excuses to think about him. Also, it was nice to be able to focus on my work. Admittedly thought, it was a little strange not hearing his notes slip under the door.
When night had come, I packed my things and left my work station, this time at a more reason hour of the day. The journey home was peaceful and tranquil. It satisfied me knowing I put in a hard day's work and things were finally looking up. Rent was on time. Father's operation had gone well. I was making steady payments to Doctor Hale. And my line of work was simple and enjoyable. I beamed on the inside. Finally, a well-deserved break in life.
I paused just as I was approaching my home to catch my breath. I could see the small home and was happy I would soon see my sweet sisters and have a rest. It wasn't much, but it was warm and safe.
I spent the night at peace with my sisters. All three were snuggled in my bed next to me as I held them close. I was truly thankful for what I had. I was thankful I could hold my dear sisters close as they slept. There was nothing I wouldn't do to protect them.
The next day as I walked to work, I felt like I had real purpose. I held my head high, proud that I could provide for my family and live more comfortably than we had ever lived before. There was food on the table every night, rent was paid, and shopping trips were more frequent. I smiled. It was high time I got a break.
When I entered my workroom, a small white note propped up by my sewing machine caught my eye. I set my coat down on a table and walked to pick it up. It was Edward's writing. It read:
"Miss Swan, I will be out of town again today on business."
I smiled to myself as I flipped it over to write:
"Thank you for telling me Mr. Cullen. I hope you have a safe trip."
I don't know why I said it. Maybe because it was just something to say. Things seemed sort of awkward between us ever since he saw me home. I sorted through a few items in the closet taking a few down to wash.
Swoosh. I smirked as I bent forward and picked up the small note. It read:
"Thank you, Miss Swan. Kind of you to say so. I hope while I am away you will make sure to leave at an adequate time as you did yesterday. That means, before the dark."
I frowned at the note. Why did he always feel that I needed protection? His protection. It was annoying to say the least. And how did he know what time I left yesterday? Did he have little spies in the corners watching my every movement?
I wrote back:
"I will be fine. If I have work to do, I will do it. I can take care of myself. Thank you."
I took the few items I had and delivered them to the washroom. I then stuffed one of the shirts into the cold water with a little soap. Where did he get the nerve to be involved in my life? He was always prying where he wasn't wanted. Just because he was wealthy and had everything and everyone at his beck and call did not mean he owned me.
After hanging the clean shirts to dry I made my way back to the garment closet. Sure, enough Edward's note was waiting for me. I sighed as I rolled my eyes while picking it up. It read:
"I understand. Stay late if you need to. My carriage will be available to take you home should you stay late. And Miss Swan, it is non-negotiable as to whether you will take it home. If you are leaving from my residence, as my employee, you will be seen safely home should you decide to work late. Try to exercise your authority in this matter and you can find other employment."
That was it. I flipped it over and wrote:
"I wish to speak with you now."
From the other side of the door I heard him softly chuckle, which made my blood boil all the more. "Come in Miss Swan," he said from the other side of the door, as if he knew I was waiting nearby.
Immediately I opened the door. And not too gracefully either. My breath caught in my throat. There he was. Just as handsome as always. Dressed in a pair of black trousers, and a white shirt that was conveniently unbuttoned towards the top to reveal his cream-colored skin. Why did he have to be so elegantly handsome? All the time! I directed my eyes to the floor clearing my throat to get a handle on my thoughts.
"Mr. Cullen," I started.
"Miss Swan," he replied in a deep husky voice.
I took a breath and looked at him. His silvery eyes captured me with interest as he waited.
"Mr. Cullen," I said again. This was embarrassing. Why did I keep losing my thoughts? If only his heart was not such a black hole, perhaps he might make a suitable man. He was too handsome for his own good. I shook my head to tame my thoughts again.
With a small tug at the sides of his lips he cleared his throat. "You called this meeting Miss Swan. Do you intend to actually say something?"
"Where do you get the nerve to order me around? How about that? Who do you think you are? I am not a child. Or a simpleton. I have taken care of myself for a long time and I don't need you or anyone else to pamper me or treat me like I'm not a capable woman."
"I never said you were not a capable woman. And I am not pampering you I-"
"You say to me, either take your carriage, or I'm fired? What nerve you must have! I do my work well. I work hard for you. And yet you try to take my personal choice away at every turn. If I don't wish to take your carriage, then I won't! You have no right to tell me how I may travel home."
Cullen heaved a sigh, mumbling something under his breath as he turned away walking towards his desk. He rubbed his hand along the dark wood on the desk in thought. Then he spoke slowly. "I am not taking away your personal choice Miss Swan. I wish you would not look at it that way. The world is a cruel place. I would hate to see something happen to you-"
"Yes, I know, you have said that many times. But there is a difference between offering your kind hand and forcing it. Do you really expect me to respond favorably to a man who claims to be a gentleman who is actually just a threatening bully?"
"Bully?" He scoffed with false amusement. "I offer to care for your needs, and you call me a bully? Well, I'm sorry we can't all be like your Doctor Hale."
What? Where did that come from? I scrunched my face in confusion. My Doctor Hale? "I do not know what you speak of."
He whirled around eyeing me intensely. "You deny it? With your arrangements and his late-night visits." I wanted to vomit. "How convenient it is that he provides exactly what you need and even accommodates you for what you lack. Surely there must be something convenient for him as well. Why else would he be so agreeable?"
"Because he is a fine gentleman! Just what are you suggesting?!" I said stalking up to him. We were inches apart from each other and his eyes roamed over me quickly before meeting my eyes once more. "How dare you presume that I- that we would-" I paused as I tried to contain my anger. Without thinking, I slapped him. When he turned his head towards me, I slapped him again.
It caught us both off guard. I took a slow breath while coming to terms with my actions. It just happened. I didn't mean to. But it just happened. Although I did not regret it. I took a few steps back from him, for I knew I was dismissed. I knew it. How could I not be? It was over. What would I do now? Go back to begging on the street? It scared me to think of such a thing. But with all that to consider, I still could not and would not apologize to him.
He practically called me a whore to my face.
He slowly turned his head back to face me. His eyes blank. I could not tell if he was angry or still in a daze. Or perhaps he was so angry it hadn't fully surfaced yet. I swallowed hard as he gazed at me.
Without another word I turned and left his office, slamming the door behind me. I could not decide whether to quit or to wait for him to fire me. Surely, he would not want to keep me. In fact, I was not even sure I wanted to stay. But what I wanted was not important. The only reason I worked here was to provide for my family. If I had another means for doing so, I would.
I waited for Edward to send me a note under the door telling me I was dismissed or for Jacob to tell me he would escort me out for good. But neither came. I just continued to work normally as if nothing had happened. I would clean and mend his garments and follow the notes left for each one. In fact, besides the notes on the garments, I heard nothing from him at all.
This continued for the next few days. There was silence between us. Edward made it clear he was out of town through Lisa's messages to me. But he sent me no notes.
I worked rather quickly to get all my work done so that I was able to leave precisely when the clock said I could. It felt like I was staying on borrowed time anyhow. It was only a matter of time before Edward came back and dealt me the real blow he had been holding back all this time. I was consumed with thoughts of what I would do for work should I lose this job. So, every garment I completed was done well. I did not want to be slacking.
When Edward returned, he would come home to find the entire garment closet done. All garments would be clean, pressed and hung nicely. If he would fire me, it would not be because of any fault in my work.
When I finished the last garment, I smiled as I put it away. There was no more work to be done till Edward returned, which would be in a day or so. When Lisa had come in to bring me food, I had told her I was done with my work completely. She just laughed and said I was free to read a book or clean up my work station.
"Perhaps you can take a tour of the grounds. You have been so busy, you haven't spent any time outside on the grounds."
I had not thought of that, but it was true. Perhaps this was the perfect time to look around the grounds. My work was done. Edward was out of town. I had nothing to do.
"I think I should. I would like to see the gardens."
"Oh yes. They are very beautiful. Master likes them well kept up. It's a wonderful place to spend your free time. Besides, who knows when you will get another chance like this?" She smiled.
I smiled back. She was right. When would I have another time like this? Work done, and Edward gone. And of course there was always the threat that he would make the choice to dismiss me when he returned. "Very well." I grabbed my shawl and headed out.
As Lisa said, the gardens were amazing. They were beautiful. It was like entering a different world. A paradise. I followed the garden path. There were fountains, small ponds with ducks, benches beneath trees, and flowerbeds with all sorts of colors. The path ended at a lake that stood between me and a forest.
I breathed in the cool crisp air and smoothed down my dress. It was peaceful. I sat down on the cold damp ground and ran my fingers through the grass. I pulled my hair loose from the tight bun it was in and let it flow freely down my shoulders. Before I knew it, I had laid down and was falling asleep to the serene sounds of birds and running water.
The warm breeze blew through my hair and I felt a ray of sunlight grace the side of my face. I will just rest a short while, I thought.
"A lady should not fall asleep so near to the forest."
I gasped at the voice and sat up. Edward was sitting proudly on a black horse letting it take a drink of the lake water. "Mr. Cullen. I had no idea you were back in town. I just-"
"Predators hunt near the lake in search of prey that come to drink."
"Yes. Well. Thank you. I was just resting is all. I finished all my work. And thought I would just take a break and see the grounds. And now I have. And now I'll go back to my workshop." I said this quickly as I stood and brushed off my dress.
Edward's eyes studied me. His lips parted a little as the breeze swooped in and blew my brown curls across my face. "Oh." I said, grabbing my hair and pulling it into a messy bun. "Excuse me. I wasn't expecting company."
"Miss Swan," Edward said stopping me in my tracks. I turned fully to face him hoping he would not address our last encounter.
"Our last words to each other," he hesitated. I cringed a little but there was nothing I could do but remain silent as he spoke. "Our last words to each other did not take place in a civil way. And I feel it should be addressed."
Did he expect me to apologize to him? Is so, he would not get it. I might not have been graceful in my actions, but they were fair.
"My words. I know it is impossible to take them back. And I'm not accustomed to doing so either. But they were not what they should have been. It was not my intention to put such vulgar accusations to your character. I respect your feelings for Doctor Hale and will not mention it again."
I blinked twice. Did he honestly just apologize to me? I didn't think him to be capable of such a thing. I nodded slowly, letting his words and actions sink in before I responded.
"Mr. Cullen. I accept your apology, but I feel I must correct your thoughts about Doctor Hale and me. You are gravely mistaken if you think we are anything but what we are. He simply takes care of the wellbeing of my father, given his recent surgery."
Edward smiled slightly. "He is not courting you then?"
Good heavens, no. Not that it was any of his business anyhow. "No. It is nothing of the sort."
"But you have a sweetheart, no doubt." I stared at Edward strangely. There was only one reason a man blatantly asked such things. My eyes expanded a little as I gazed into his playful grey eyes.
Why on earth would he ask such things from me? I was not his status or rank. I certainly had no money to offer or add to his wealth. Perhaps he was seeking to toy with me as most wealthy men did with those of lesser means.
I thought it to be perfect time to tell a little lie that I did in fact have a sweetheart, but I refrained. "No. And it's just as well. I don't have the time for silly romances. I have my family to care for. Even if a man wanted to court me, I feel he should know I have not the time."
Edward laughed at this. "Silly romances. Odd for a lady with your notions to say such things. I thought you believed in flowers and romances. Isn't that all part of the love you believe exists?"
"It does exist. I just simply have no time for it right now." I started to walk away, but he quickly positioned his horse and slowly walked beside me.
"I thought love was unexpected. If everyone planed for love, wouldn't that take away from all romance?"
I sighed. "No. Love can not be planned. One knows when it strikes. And I think you should know it hasn't for me. Not in the slightest." It was a kind way of telling him where my interest stood and I hoped it would discourage his efforts. But it only seemed to fuel his fire.
"You also can not plan who you love either. It just happens." How would he know? I knew him to be incapable of such a thing. He believed love to be a fairy tale. He was just saying the things he knew I believed in. Perhaps he just wanted to make conversation, but I was in no mood.
"I suppose."
"Well then, it doesn't make much sense that you would say you have no time for something you can't plan for." He smirked at me from under his top hat. "Love could happen at any moment," he said with slight sarcasm in his voice. "At least that is what you say you believe in. And if that moment comes, it would be logical to not let that person go."
"Sometimes the right person may seem like the right person, but in the end is not truly the one that can make you happy."
"But it's worth finding out. Otherwise, you risk the pain of seeing what should have been yours with another. What is love without a little risk?"
"Or, you move on and find the one that truly is your match." I looked pointedly at him. "That, I think would the wisest course."
Edward's eyes took a slow stroll down my body and smiled as if I revealed some unknown secret to him. I tipped my head to the side wondering what I said to make him smile so wickedly.
"You have interesting notions Miss Swan. Most are fantasy and illogical. Should a man ever chose to court you, I pray he stays on his toes and enjoys the chase. You would need a man who enjoys the challenge."
"I'm not a trophy Sir. Or an animal that needs herding. I won't be a challenge for the man that claims my heart. I would give myself willingly."
"I don't think anyone gives themselves willingly to someone until they are taught to trust that person. And trust comes from taking a risk. I think, Miss Swan, you would give yourself willingly, but in time. You don't strike me as an open book to the world."
My heart fluttered a little. He was right of course. He had quite a gift when it came to perception of others, I would give him that. "I suppose I prefer my privacy."
"Something I think we both value in life. You and I chose what we allow the world to see. But that doesn't mean there isn't more to us." I looked up at him and slightly smiled. He could be charming when he wanted to.
"I cannot argue with you on that Mr. Cullen."
He eyed me mischievously, causing me to remember he was still the devil. No matter how charming he was, he was still an arrogant man.
"You know, this is only one part of the grounds. There is a whole other half you have not seen."
I cleared my throat. "Another time, perhaps. When I finish my work next time, I will be sure to go the other direction and see them."
I could see him smirk beneath his tall black hat. "Why wait? You have the time now. I can show you the other half now."
"That's very kind of you Sir. But I think I should be heading in now. It's um. It's chilly. As I said, another time."
"As you wish Miss Swan. I assume you know the way back?"
I nodded. "Yes, thank you."
He nodded and then trotted off. I half expected him to try to escort me, but he didn't this time. Thankfully. I did not want to argue with him again about the fact that I was a capable woman, able to take care of myself.
When I arrived back on the manor, I saw a few garments had been hung up in the closet with notes attached to them. They must have been the recent ones from Edward's trip.
I glanced outside my window. It was getting late, so I thought to just do one garment and then head home. I would get an early fresh start in the morning.
So I did one of his shirts and hung it back up neatly before packing up my things. I could not wait to be home. The first thing I would do was light a fire and put on a pot of stew. I smiled as I ran through the ingredients in my mind.
When I arrived home, I saw Mary outside. It was strange to see her outside. I frowned at this as I quickly rushed up to her. She had tears in her eyes. "Mary! Mary what's wrong? Are you hurt? Tell me!"
"Papa," she hiccupped.
"Father? What about him?! Is he alright?" She shook her head. Quickly I grabbed her arm and pulled her along as I ran inside the house. I stopped suddenly at the sight before me. My father sat on a chair with his hands cuffed behind his back. Four men of authority stood around him while one stepped forward and spoke.
"Do you understand what these crimes entail Mr. Swan?"
My eyes widened as I looked on. Crimes? "Stop! You have the wrong man. My father is innocent. Please. He has been very sick. He couldn't possibly be responsible for any crime."
The man turned to me. "Are you taking sides with this traitorous man? If so, I will view you as a co-conspirator."
"Sir, we are innocent hard-working people. Trying to make a living. We have committed no crimes."
"This man owes the government a debt of ten thousand dollars. The bank will offer no further extension on his payments. We have come to bring him to justice by order of the court."
"Ten tho-" I couldn't even finish the words. What was this? Had we been framed? "Sir I do not know-"
"Mr. Swan has been creating quite a large tab at the pubs and having his fill of gambling. Maybe you are unaware, but he is far from innocent."
"Father?" I looked at him with pleading eyes, begging him to refute the charges. But he didn't. He merely looked away in shame. So, it was true. How could he? I had worked so hard to keep us together. "Say something," I said trying to hold back the tears.
He didn't look at me. And would not speak.
"Under order of the court we are here to collect Mr. Swan so that he may be sentenced for his crimes. And we are here to claim ownership of everything in this home. Although it will hardly account for his debt."
"Please," I whispered. "Take everything if you must. But leave us be."
He handed me a piece of paper. Through glassy eyes, I scanned the paper. An eviction notice, with the landlord's signature.
"I'm afraid, further action is needed. I took the time to alert the landlord of this misfortune. It is his wish, that given the crimes attached to your name and the penalties that will be inflicted, you all are to be evicted. He will offer you no residence here any longer. The law will support him in this, and I will see it done. He wants nothing more to do with you, and has made it clear that he expects you and everything that is not taken for debt to be out."
"No. Please. You can't do that. We have no other place to live."
"By order of the court, we have to. Try to stop us, and you too will be under arrest for obstructing justice. You and the children are to be out in two days. If you are unable to care for the children's needs, you may take them to the nearest orphanage.
"What do you mean?" I could feel the tears coming. "What do you mean?!" I screamed in anger.
"You are old enough to be on your own and care for the children Miss Swan. From this day forward, you will be their guardian. But I do advise you to take them to an orphanage until you have at least found some form of residence. Children should not be forced to see the misfortunes their parents endow them with. Mr. Swan will no longer be permitted to live among society. As that is, his underage children will go to the next legal guardian who is of age. You. But if you are unable to care for them, there are suitable orphanages available until you find some form of residence."
"I can take care of them." I held my sisters close to me.
"It is your choice, whatever you chose to do with the children. But I must enforce that you be out of this house as the papers say. You should in fact count yourself lucky I am not arresting you as well. I happen to believe you are innocent, but your father will stand trial and for the good of all society go to debtor's prison. I can not force you to send the children to an orphanage, but I feel it is the best choice for you Miss Swan. I can even take them to a suitable orphanage when your eviction goes into effect."
"I love them. I can't be separated from them. I'm all they have. We are a family."
"Very well. Your choice." The man looked at my father and then at his men. "Take him away." The man turned and marched out of the house with my father in irons.
I wanted to hit myself. Tell myself to wake up. How could this be happening? This was not real. It couldn't be. I had done everything right! I worked hard. I was honest. I was supporting the family. For once, everything was in order. Why? Why now? Now I was losing everything. Everything that mattered.
I slumped to the floor and cried. My sisters gathered around me and wrapped their little arms around me.
I knew what I had to do. There was no way I could keep my sisters and force them to go without a home or food. I could be strong for as long as I wanted, but without a home or food to give them, I would break down. I knew the man was right, the children should go to an orphanage until I acquired a suitable home. But how could I be forced to say goodbye to them? How could I even leave them for a day?
At least I still had my job with Cullen. I would work harder than I ever had before to make sure I continued to make a steady wage. Perhaps my goodbye to my sisters would only be a very short goodbye. I felt so much anger. Anger at the blows life dealt me. Anger at my father for tearing us apart. Anger that I had been born with so little, it was a struggle to keep the few things I loved in the world.
"Shh," I said to my sisters as they cried in soft whimpers. "It's ok. I promise, I will take care of you."
I felt a few tears roll down my cheek, as I wondered if miracles were possible. Because I certainly needed one.
Ok. A little more drama has come Bella's way. Interesting. What do you think will happen next? I'm curious. I love to hear what you guys think up, and where you think the direction of the story will head. Some of you may be right, and some of you may be way off. Lol.
Bella's father: Wow. Frightful little you know what. What a complete you also know what. Not good.
Edward showed a slightly different side. He is still Edward, but maybe there is a bit more to him than meets the eye. And what was that part in the story about him going through some sort of pain? Hmmmm. Well thanks guys, for reading and reviewing. I'm having fun.
Please leave comments. Love to hear from you guys. Short or long, I love them all. Brutally honest, or funny laughs. And yes, even corrections.
-Your strange writer.